Friday, August 17, 2018

Endo ePistle


Famous First Words: Born on a mountain top in Tennessee... Davy Crockett
It is National Motorcycle Week (August 12-18). What do you call a laughing motorcycle? A Yamahahaha
..........If ever a wiz there was.........Judy Garland …..We're Off to See the Wizard
Let not your heart be troubled neither let it be afraid. John 14:27
It is a humid (92%) Friday morning. The temperature is a pleasant 71°F. The pale blue sky is striped with fluffy bands shaped like jet trails and a light breeze keeps the graceful willow moving just enough to spread the grace around the yard. Puck lies inside on the soft carpet at the open door watching the backyard for signs of unwanted intruders or for one of the neighbor dogs to come out for a morning stretch. Birdsong is intermittent, sometimes here filling the yard, sometime distant and indistinct. But cheery wherever it is. The grass is green and sparkly from dew or last night's rain; even in the shade it appears to be strewn with diamonds. A fly wanders by me, whispers something in Puck's ear and exits. Our room smells of last night's incense but the aroma of damp earth wafts through the door now and then on the breeze. I stop to watch the scene and sip my decaf, creamed and sweetened. Seems like a pretty good morning, at least so far.
Hope your weekend gets you where you wanna go, ePistliers.
Endo: Stopping with the rear wheel off the ground (the opposite of a wheelie).
Young riders pick a destination and go ... Old riders pick a direction and go. / There are drunk bikers. There are old bikers. There are NO old, drunk bikers
..........and a couple of tralalas.........Chorus …..In the Merry Old Land of Oz
Goodbye, Queen of Soul: I sing to the realists; people who accept it like it is. --Aretha Franklin The Franklin song that I have on my bookmarks Chain of Fools. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGAiW5dOnKo
Trivia Questions: Happy National Thrift Store Day !! Here's some questions about Lawrence's local thrift shop – Social Service League of Lawrence, KS
^ About when did the League come into existence?
^^ What has been the principle inspiration for the League?
^^^ What is the only product listed for the League's facebook page?
^^^^ Besides the thrift store, what other major service does the League provide?
^^^^^ And for locals – or visitors to the city – what is the address?
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I am starting to think I will never be old enough to know better.
Fake Library Statistic of the Week: 42% of staplers purchased for the new school year are already missing. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop. The surgeon was there waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his bike. The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey Doc can I ask you a question?" The surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take valves out, fix'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work? The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, whispering to the mechanic....."Try doing it with the engine running!"
..........while my thoughts are busy hatchin'.........Ray Bolyer …..If I Only Had a Brain
Moonbeam: You only live once, but if yo do it right, once is enough. --Mae West
Something to Think About of the Week:

Big Hello: Bon dia – Papiamento Aruba, Netherlands Antilles https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I don't like making plans for the day because then the word “premeditated” gets thrown around in the courtroom. --Corpse Candy Submitted by dr of oh
Week of the Week: Weird Contest Week (8/12-18) --Who can charm the most worms out of a 10 x 10 square ft patch of grass? That’s the basic premise of this competition that people actually train for. The world championship is held in Willastown, England. http://www.willastonprimaryacademy.co.uk/worm-charming/
The wind was so strong last night I really struggled to light my cigarette. Eventually, after 20 minutes of trying, I gave in and stopped my hog on the hard shoulder.
..........Dreams really do come true.........Judy Garland …..Over the Rainbow
^ The date is disputed. Our favorite version is the Social Service League began in 1863. People favoring this date like it because that it began after Quantrill's raid (August 21, 1863) to help the victims many of whom had all their belongings destroyed. “what’s not in contention is that Lawrence’s oldest continuously running service organization has done a lot of good for a lot of people over the past … century-plus. “
Almanac: It is Friday, August 17, 2018. The moon will be first quarter tomorrow and is in Scorpio. It is Meaning of "IS" Day, National Thrift Shop Day, Men's Grooming Day, and Hug Your Boss Day. In Argentina it is San Martin Day (1850) and India celebrates Janmashtami. Both Indonesia-1945 and Gabon-1960 celebrate their Independence Day. Because it is Friday it is also Admission Day in Hawaii (1959), and Klondike Gold Day in the Yukon (1896).
Among those who were born on this day were Davy Crockett (1786), Marcus Garvey (1887), Monty Wooley (1999), Mae West (1892), Maureen O'Hara (1921), Larry Rivers (1923), Robert De Niro (1943), and Sean Penn (1960).
On August thirteenth Fulton's steamboat began it's first trip (1807), the first international crew race was held (Oxford beat Harvard, 1969), the first woman magistrate in the US was elected (WY, 1870), Das Gotterdammerung premiered (1876), Mars' moon Phobos was discovered (1977), Wizard of Oz opened (1939), building began on the Berlin Wall (1961), and Ringo Starr became the Beatles new drummer (1962).
Night Sky, 8/13: First-quarter Moon (exact at 3:49 am tonight EDT). Jupiter shines to its lower right. Antares is three times as far to the Moon's lower left. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Power MorphiCon (8/17-19, Pasadena, CA) Go Go Power Rangers !! http://officialpowermorphicon.com/
Actual Science Convention of the Week: WCASET 11 – World Conference on Applied Science Engineering and Technology. (8/17-18, Frankfurt, Germany) ...a world class stage for scientists to share the exploration discoveries by sorting out International/National Conferences. https://www.eventbrite.com/e/11th-world-conference-on-applied-science-engineering-and-technology-tickets-46561186763
This Week: Saturday, August 18 – International Homeless Animals Day & World Honey Bee Day & Fajita Day
Sunday, August 19 – Aviation Day & Chef Appreciation Day & International Bow Day
Night Sky, 8/19: Left of the Moon are Saturn and then bright Mars.
Monday, August 20 – Cupcake Day & National Radio Day
Tuesday, August 21 – Poet's Day & Senior Citizen's Day
Wednesday, August 22 – Be An Angel Day & Take Your Cat To The Vet Day
Night Sky, 8/22: Venus shines low in the west during twilight. Mars is at its higest in the south around 11 or midnight. Saturn glows yellow in the south at nightfall. Uranus & Neptune are well up in the east and southeast about 1 am.
Thursday, August 23 – Valentino Day
Winter is natures way of telling you to maintain your bike. / Other people don't like my queue jumping. Especially when I use my motorcycle.
..........And through the town the joyous news was spread.........Chorus …..Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead
^^ In a 1940 speech before the league’s board of directors, then-store manager Bessie Taylor said the group started from a single idea: assisting friends and neighbors. Today's mission statement says “by relieving the condition of needy individuals and families, to the end that they may sustain themselves.”
'Nother Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: White House Rejects Supremacist Label: “No One Has Done More Than Trump To Prove White People Are Not Superior” --The Borowitz Report
Moonbeam: When I'm good I'm very, very good, but when I'm bad, I'm better. --Mae West
Late Night Snacks: In her new book, Omarosa claims that she once walked in on Drumpf in the Oval Office eating a piece of paper. Eating paper. On the bright side, that’s actually the healthiest thing he’s ever eaten. --Jimmy Fallon / President Drumpf had dinner on Friday with Apple CEO Tim Cook. Well, Tim, did you try unplugging him and plugging him back in? --Seth Meyers / And there was another huge revelation from Omarosa this weekend: She said the Drumpf administration was “deceiving this nation” by hiding how mentally declined President Drumpf actually is. Oh, come on. We see his tweets. He’s not fooling anyone. --James Corden
Not So Late Night Snacks: The only thing worse than being a space cadet in the space force would be in the space force reserve. You only have to do 2 weekends a year but it takes 2 1/2 months to get up there. --Peter Sagal Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me
Courageous people do not fear forgiving for the sake of peace. --Nelson Mandela
..........Oz never did give nothing to the tinman..........America …..Tin Man
^^^ Compassion is the league's only product.
Worthless Fact of the Week: The Martian moon Phobos orbits only a few thousand miles above the Red Planet's surface. Its proximity to its planet is one of the reasons astronomers were unable to see the satellite until the late 19th century. In fact, the moon is getting closer to Mars over the centuries, and eventually will either break up or be pulled into the Martian surface.
Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Boba Fett's full name is Bobalicious Fettuccini.
Weird Word of the Week: Warchalking – to chalk symbols that indicate that an unsecured wireless networking station is nearby that can be used to tap into a corporate network and get illicit free internet access. http://www.worldwidewords.org/turnsofphrase/tp-war1.htm
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Avoid splattered paint on windows, metal work,and floors. Before painting a room, dip a Q-tips Cotton Swab in Vaseline Petroleum Jelly and run it around the edges of glass; coat door hinges, doorknobs, lock latches; and spread a thin coat of Vaseline Petroleum Jelly along a linoleum or tile floor (obvioulsy not carpet) where it meets the wall. Paint smears will wipe off with a cloth. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/vaseline.html
HOG now stands for Heavyset Old Geezers. / If you put 10,000 hogs on the bottom of the ocean, you have a good start.
...........Never more be scared of rabbits.........Bert Lahr …..If I Only Had the Nerve
^^^^ The Social Service League operates a Vision Program which, with the cooperation of local optometrists, provides free eye exams and eye glasses to both school children and adults.
Grammar Bar Joke of the Week: Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys everything.
Still Another Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If the human population held hands around the equator a significant portion of them would drown.
Puck the Brave Episode of the Week: Here's our fearless Puck guarding a new gate in the case of Bruno's Bark.
And here's Bruno – he lives behind us.
They named it the “Harley Owners Group” because the term “Special Ed” was already taken. / When a biker and a NASCAR driver get in a fight, everyone wins.
..........When she fell from Kansas a miracle occurred.........Billy Burke …..Come Out, Come Out
^^^^^ The Social Service League of Lawrence is housed at 905 Rhode Island, 66044.
Month of the Week: August is Rye Month –What did the therapist say to the loaf of bread? Rye so serious. Can you make a sandwich with corned beef, sauerkraut, and Swiss cheese? Rye not.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If a knight in Prague dons his armor, does that mean the Czech is in the mail? --Submitted by sb of ar
Today's Peace of History, August 17, 1982: The first draft resister since the Vietnam era, Enten Eller, was convicted. A member of the Mennonite Church of the Brethren Resistance, he received three years’ probation in Bridgewater, Virginia, for refusing to register for the draft. Support demonstrations occurred all over the US.
Harley's are some of the safest bikes on the road because they can't go fast enough for you to hurt yourself. / The difference between a Harley and an old dog is the old dog can get into the back of the pickup by himself.
..........I'd be tender, I'd be gentle..........Jack Haley …..If I Only Had a Heart
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle August 17, 2018. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Peace, Laughs, and Roaring Engines. Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If things were turned around, I seriously doubt that one cat would take in 26 old ladies.
Moonbeam: Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. --Mae West
Cost of War:
As of 8/16/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,847,123,841,080.
As of 8/9/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,845,243,866,479.
As of 8/16/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $844,249,157,200.
As of 8/9/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $842,971,649,503.
As of 8/16/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $610,998,847,911.
As of 8/9/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $609,392,004,067.
As of 8/16/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $294,499,715,649.
As of 8/9/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $294,134,793,601.
As of 8/16/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,596,872,233,132.
As of 8/9/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,591,744,570,141.
Where there is charity and wisdom, there is neither fear nor ignorance. --Francis of Assisi
..........Back to the howling old owl in the woods.........Elton John …..Goodbye Yellow Brick Road
If a Hell's Angel throws a hand-grenade at you, you should take out the pin and throw it back. / I crossed a donkey and a motorcycle and got a yamheehaw.
Famous Last Words: Zurück vom Ring! --Hagen Das Gotterdämmerung
May Peace rev your motor
And Joy speed your journey
prairie mama
christine


Last Laugh:


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