Goosed ePistle

Famous First Words: The paragraphs, you say, Mr. Snake, were all inserted? --Lady Sneerwell Richard Sheridan The School for Scandal.

Happy Mother Goose Day. Here's a few nursery rhymes for ePistliers, dreamers, lovers, and me. Do you love me, Or do you not? You told me once, But I forgot. ^^ What's the news of the day, Good neighbor, I pray? “They say a balloon Is gone up to the moon. ^^ Hey, Donald Diddle, Iran's got your fiddle. The rocket flew over the moon. JD's cat laughed to see all of that and the Dems just sing that same tune.

..........Who you gonna call?.........Ray Parker Jr …..Ghostbusters

A general strike is when working people across many jobs, industries, and communities collectively stop participating in the system. No work, no buying, no compliance, not until real demands are met. It's not just about labor. It's about people. When we stop together, the system has to listen. --Unknown, posted in West Virginia

I am different. Let this not upset you. --Paracelsus

It is a chilly (40°F) Friday morning. The sky is nearly cloudless with only a few thin streak that could be left over jet trails. A blue jay, two sparrows and a squirrel are having a breakfast of sunflower seeds on the patio but the world itself is quiet. None of the birds are singing out Beltane blessings. There is very little wind. The willow branches high up the tall tree are scraggly and battle worn for the relentless winds we have had lately. Now they are resting from their frenzied dancing. I am at my desk listening to Puck snoring under my feet and sipping my doctored decaf. It is the day for the general strike and I have no plans to shop or work or go to school. I plan to spend my day writing and reading. Blessed be, on this fine holiday morning, blessed be.

Today is Beltane, it is the start of the glorious summer. It's time for fires, beach trips, and merriment under blue skies once again.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit. --Noel Coward

My uncle died a week ago And left me all his riches: A wooden leg; a feather bed; And a pair of leather breeches. ^^ If many men did what many men do, The world would be better—I think so; don't you? ^^ Mary had a little lamb. She dressed it lots of leather. A sheep wrapped in a cow? Why not dress her in feathers.

..........We'll take on the world and win.........Rita Coolidge …..All Time High

If the workers take a notion, they can stop all speeding trains; every ship upon the ocean they can tie with mighty chains. --Joe Hill

Trivia Questions: Today is International Workers' Day

1. What is the purpose of International Workers' Day?

2. When did this holiday begin?

3. What were conditions like before the 8-hour day was enacted?

4. What do you know about the Haymarket Incident?

5. What's the difference between May Day and Labor Day?

Big Hello: Bitaю (Vitayu) - Ukrainian https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I've reached the age where I no longer know if I've sustained an injury of if that's just the way I am now. --Submitted by cjj of ks

Image of the Week: How tall do the trees grow in Washington?

Question of the Week: Who put the alphabet in alphabetical order?

Twelve pairs hanging high, Twelve knights riding by, Each knight took a pear, And left a dozen hanging there. ^^ There was a girl in our town, silk an' satin was her gown, Silk an' satin, gold an' velvet, Guess her name--three times I've tell'd it. ^^ RFJK was walking one day and found a bear cub that was dead. He took it back home, used a brush and a comb; what has gone wrong with his head?

..........There ought to be clowns.........Judy Collins …..Send In The Clowns

May Day Strong: No Work, No School, No Shopping --Indivisible

Moonbeam: You ought to be out raising hell. This is the fighting age. Put on your fighting clothes. --Mother Jones

Blasphemy of the Week: Thou shalt not leave your kneeler down when going to receive Holy Communion.

Coffee Joke of the Week: Who charges more per cup – Starbucks or Victoria's Secret?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When my fellow marines and I were being shot at by al-Qaeda and ISIS, I kept thinking, “If only we had a ballroom.” --Submitted by USDS

Wouldn't it be funny-- Wouldn't it, now-- If the dog said, “Moo-oo” And the cow said, “Bow-wow?” ^^ St Dunstan, as the story goes, once pulled the devil by the nose, with red hot tongs, which made him roar, that could be heard ten miles or more. ^^ Old Mother Pam went for the sham and everyone knew she was lying. Dear Mother Bondi protected the blondie, or at least she was trying.. Old Mother Pam was bad at the sham and so her career is dying.

..........What a lonesome feeling when you're by yourself.........Little Walter …..Blues With A Feeling

We have people power. We are the majority. We will never stop fighting for the democracy we deserve. --Women's March

1) International Workers' Day aka May Day is a holiday celebrating workers and the history of labor organizing. https://irle.ucla.edu/2025/04/28/may-day-history-significance/

Almanac: It is Friday, May 1, 2026. The moon is full (Flower) today and is in Scorpio. Today is May Day, Amtrak Day, Beltane, Buddha Day, Dandelion Days (1-2), Discuss Your Wage Day, Executive Coaching Day, Global Love Day, Hug Your Cat Day, International Doodle Dog Day, International Guerilla Sunflower Gardening Day, International Sauvignon Blanc Day, International Workers Day, Keep Kids Alive Drive 25 Day, Law Day, Lei Day, Loyalty Day, May One Day, Mother Goose Day, National Bubba Day, National Heatstroke Prevention Day, National High Potassium Awareness Day, National Purebred Dog Day, New Homeowner's Day, Religious Brothers Day, School Principals' Day, School Lunch Hero Day, Silver Star Banner Day, and Tuba Day. ~~Whew! They should just call it Everything Day.

Among those born on this day were Paracelsus (1493), Joseph Addison (1672), Mother Jones (1830), Calamity Jane (Martha Burke, 1852), Pierre Teilhard de Chardin (1881), Glenn Ford (1916), Jack Paar (1916), Joseph Heller (1922), Terry Southern (1924), Harry Belafonte (1927), Little Walter (1930), Judy Collins (1929), Rita Coolidge (1944), and Ray Parker Jr. (1954).

On May first England, Wales and Scotland formed the United Kingdom (1707), Sheridan's School for Scandal premiered in London (1777), the first adhesive postage stamps were issued (Penny Blacks, 1840), the first telegraph message was sent (1844), Argentina adopted its constitution (1853), the American Equal Rights Association formed (1866), Howard University was chartered (1867), the Folies-Bergere opened in Paris (1869), Buffalo Bill Cody's first wild west show opened (1883), the first International Workers Day was held (1889), Satchel Paige made his pitching debut (1926), the Empire State Building opened (1931), The Catholic Worker newspaper was founded (Dorothy Day & Peter Maurin, 1933), Batman comics hit the streets (1939), Citizen Kane premiered (1941), Cheerios went on sale (1941), and Pirate Radio Station 259 (England/France) began transmitting (1969).

Night Sky, 5/1: The Flower Moon rises gently into the night sky, glowing in soft silver and quiet gold as spring reaches its peak. This weekend the waxing gibbous moon will set during the early morning hours and will provide a small window of opportunity to view meteor activity under dark skies between moonset (5:57 am) and dawn.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: The boys find the magic box

Extra Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Idk who needs to hear this, but I switched from buying coffee every day to making it at home 2 years ago and I'm still not a millionaire. https://www.facebook.com/groups/1473909789461636/

This Week: Saturday, May 2 – Indigenous Arts Day & Mariachi Day & National Home Brew Day & World Tuna Day

Sunday, May 3 – Garden Meditation Day & International Firefighters Day & Public Radio Day & World Laughter Day & World Press Freedom Day

Night Sky, 5/3: The 97% illuminated, waning gibbous will dominate the sky, rising alongside the bright star Regulus. Venus and Jupiter will be visible in the evening, while the early Summer Triangle, featuring the star Vega, begins to appear in the northeast.

Monday, May 4 – Lag B-Omer & National Day of Reason & National Weather Observers Day

Tuesday, May 5 – Cartoonists Day & Cinco de Mayo & National Astronaut Day

Night Sky, 5/5: The Eta Aquariids meteor shower peaks tonight. The best time to watch in before dawn. https://www.amsmeteors.org/meteor-showers/meteor-shower-calendar/

Wednesday, May 6 – No Homework Day & Russell Stover Candies Day & School Nurse Day

Night Sky, 5/6: Sunrise: 6:15 am Sunset: 8:20 pm (14 hours and 5 minutes of daylight) Moonrise: 12:28 am Moonset: 9:26 am

Thursday, May 7 – Beaufort Scale (Wind) Day & World Password Day & National Barrier Awareness Day

My little old man and I fell out; I'll tell you what t'was all about,-- I had money and he had none, And that's the way the noise begun. ^^Jerry Hall, He was so small, A rat could eat him, Hat and all ^^ Many mumbling mice are making Midnight music In the moonlight. ^^ Jack and Jill went up the hill to buy pork chops for dinner. Jack and Jill were short of cash, and came back down much thinner.

..........My head is turning around.........Harry Belafonte …..Jamaica Farewell

May 1st! No work, No school, No spending. Time to hit their wallets! --US Democratic Socialists

2) The holiday originated from a movement demanding improved working conditions and greater recognition for workers’ contributions. In 1884, a national federation of unions announced a campaign to establish an eight-hour workday by May 1, 1886. Workers in cities across North America went on strike leading up to that date in one of the era’s largest and most tumultuous periods of worker unrest.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: They say women are emotional but I've never seen anything more dramatic than a man being held accountable for his actions. --leadingwomen https://www.facebook.com/NationalNOW

Moonbeam: What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity. These are but trifles, to be sure; but scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is inconceivable. --Joseph Addison

Fun Facts of the Week: On the morning of February 6, 1919, Seattle, a city of 315,000 people, stopped working. 25,000 other union members had joined 35,000 shipyard workers already on strike. The city's AFL unions, 101 of them, had voted to walk out in a gesture of support and solidarity. Read more

Audio of the Week: You Fascist Bound To Lose sung by Woody Guthrie 1944 (1:34) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VwcKwGS7OSQ

The human body is vapor materialized by sunshine mixed with the life of the stars. --Paracelsus

A man of words and not of deeds is like a garden full of weeds. ^^ Multiplication is vexation, Division is as bad; The Rule of Three doth puzzle me, And practice drives me mad. ^^ Bah! Bah! Red Sheep, have you any hope? No! No! No! No!. That's even worse than dope.

Unity over division! Whether you're a Progressive, Marxist, Anarchist, or a Democratic Socialist you're welcome here! --US Democratic Socialists

..........She take me money and runs Venezuela.........Harry Belafonte …..Matilda

3) Before the 8-hour day, USA labor conditions were marked by grueling 10 to 16-hour workdays, six days a week, often with minimal breaks, particularly in industrial settings. Workers faced unsafe environments at low wages for both adults and children.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm with President Trump. The WHCD shooting revealed the need for a secure, bulletproof ballroom to keep people safe. That is why going forward I will be advocating for a ballroom to be built at every US elementary school. --gamelawkate

Weird Word of the Week: Quiescent: Something that is quiet or still, often used to describe a calm and peaceful scene. https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/quiescent

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Clean a burn stain from a pot or pan. If you burn a pot or pan on the stove and want to clean out the brown burn stain, boil some Coca-Cola in the pot or pant and the burn stain will come off. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola2.html

Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater, Whacked off in the movie theater. Sprayed his load across the screen, And ruined Titanic's final scene. -Andrew Dice Clay ^^ Little Boy Blue – He needed the money -Andrew Dice Clay ^^ You better watch out. You better keep cool. Success will find you if you stay in school. ^^ Bah! Bah! red sheep, have you any shame. No! No! No! No! Good and bad, it's all the same.

No School. No Work. No Shopping. We are taking collective action and demanding a nation that puts workers over billionaires. --Women's March

...........You shake, shake here, you shake, shake there.........Little Walter …..Mellow Down Easy

4) In May 1886, police in Chicago shot striking workers, prompting activists to organize a protest in the city’s Haymarket Square. When a bomb exploded at that protest, killing one police officer and wounding others, police opened fire into the crowd, resulting in the deaths and injuries of both police and protesters. Eight protesters were arrested for inciting violence. The ensuing trial was considered by many to be unfair and resulted in the execution of seven of the eight men (1). This series of events would come to be known as the “Haymarket Incident” or “Haymarket Affair.”

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm looking forward to watching the World Origami Championship. It's on Paper View. https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100093217332185

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Ashika-Con 2026 (1-2, Vancouver, WA) ...the ultimate fan experience... https://www.ashikacon.com/

Helpful Website of the Week: May Day Strong ( https://maydaystrong.org/ ) will help you find vigils, demonstrations, and other strike activities.

Spark of Joy of the Week: Utah Phillips singing Solidarity Forever: https://youtu.be/5rBVd9JAz3M (4:29)

Ah, yes! I wrote the “Purple Cow” – I'm sorry now I wrote it! But I can tell you anyhow, I just might kill you if you quote it. ^^ I never beat a rotten egg, I hever hope to beat one; But I can tell you anyhow, I'd rather beat than eat one. ^^ Twinkle, twinkle K2-18b. Entangle a quantum, we'll talk, you'll see.

The goal is to shift from mobilizing to organizing, so we are ready to respond when it matters: to ICE activity in our communities, to attacks on elections, to the ongoing consolidation of power by the Trump regime and its allies. --May 1^st Strike Committee

..........So blow, you old Blue Northern.........Judy Collins …..Someday Soon

5) Labor Day is celebrated in the United States and Canada on the first Monday in September. The origins of this holiday are also rooted in the 19th century when the Central Labor Union organized the first Labor Day march on September 5, 1882 in New York City. It became an official federal holiday in 1894 (3). Unlike Labor Day, May Day is not officially recognized in the United States as a federal holiday. However, both holidays have ties to the American labor movement and both uplift the accomplishments of workers.

Protest Sign of the Week: I've Seen 17 Presidents In My 94 Years And He's The WORST

Quote of the Week: The belief in the possibility of a short, decisive war appears to be one of he most ancient and dangerous of human illusions. --Robert Lynd

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What kind of jerk makes an anti-anxiety pill that's difficult to break in half? --Submitted by INRITH

Today's Peace of History: , May 1, 1887: May Day was called Emancipation Day in 1886 when 340,000 went on strike (though it was Saturday it was a regular day of work) in Chicago for the 8-hour workday.

John Lithgow & Mother Goose: POTUS whose pants are routinely on fire, Could be Dumpty the Huckster or Dumpty the Liar. ^^ ...Blithering idiot, gone round the bend: when in the world will this lunacy end?

The poor were wise, who, by the rich oppressed, withdrew, and sought a secret place of rest. --Juvenal

..........But I forgot how to dream.........Rita Coolidge …..That's The Way I've Always Heard It Should Be

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, May 1, 2026: Goosed ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them. --Joseph Heller

Cost of War:

Pentagon Spending as of 5/01/26: $592,500,326,688

Pentagon Spending is April 2026: $81,264,897,194 Average spent per day $2,708,829,906.46

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/category/military/

The higest degree of a medicine is Love. --Paraclesus

Famous Last Words: Merry part until we merry meet again! --Beltane blessing

Labor will feed the People… Labor will care for the babies and the sick… Labor will preserve order…—Anna Louise Strong, summarizing the intentions of the General Strike

..........Good night turned into late night.........Ray Parker Jr …..Girls Are More Fun

Tariffs posed by Trump, Put the farmers in the dump. O, no the Derry-O, the farmers in a slump. --Stephen Colbert ^^ Once upon a time when pigs spoke rhyme, And monkeys chewed tobacco, And hens took snuff to make them tough, And ducks went quack, quack, quack O! ^^ Who killed cock robin? I said UHI, to keep the profits high. Who saw her die? We said the bears, to spare the billionaires.

May Peace lift your spirits

And Joy raise your soul

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

Digested ePistle

Famous First Words: Sì: corre voce che l’Etiope --Verdi Aida (Yes, it is rumored that the Ethiopian...)

The salamander went to Hollywood to make newt movies. == As part of NYC's anti-litter campaign veterinarians began prescribing birth-control pills for dogs. ~~Today's jokes are from the 100 best Readers Digest jokes.

..........I'm going to get some life back into my life.........Barbra Streisand …..Before the Parade Passes By

Establish democracy at home, based on human rights as superior to property rights. — Jeannette Rankin

It is a cool (51°F) Friday morning. There is no cloud in the sky to hide the sun or suggest less than full light and warmth. An unfamiliar bird song (ee^et, ee^et) wafts through the air spreading cheer and good morning greetings. The breeze is a little strong (10 mph) from the north which is causing the chill and making the willow branches dance a morning flamenco; it does not sync with the ee^et, ee^et. Last night's rain storm is in evidence everywhere and damp soil looks rich and has that sweet aroma with which it enriches the early morning air. Squirrels and birds and rabbits all come to eat a few sunflower seeds for breakfast before scampering off to their daily chores. I retreat inside before the whole backyard breaks into a Disney cartoon's show-stopping, musical number. Deep breath. Now I get to sip my morning breakfast blend (no decaf today) and write to you. To quote an old Zen joke: mere existence is such a gas.

Hope your weekend is whatever you want it to be, planetmates.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: She's so indigenous even her farts sound like bison calls. --Submitted by FNOG

According to the police reports the Devil was arrested for possession. == She was so rich that when she tickled her baby she said, “Gucci, Gucci, Goo”.

..........Traveling in a world of our creation.........Barbra Streisand …..Pure Imagination

Trivia Questions: It's National Hairball Awareness Day

1. What is the scientific name for a hairball?

2. What animals beside cats get hairballs?

3. Hairballs are seasonal. Which season sees increased hairball activity?

4. What is considered a “normal” number of hairballs annually for cats?

5. Is there anything you can do to help?

Big Hello: Salam – Turkmen https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you're bored you can simply close your eyes and rotate a cow in your mind. It's free and the cops can't stop you. --Submitted by Club42

Image of the Week: Me and Bloody Mary

Question of the Week: If a smurf holds its breath, what color does it turn? https://www.happierhuman.com/funny-philosophical-questions-wa2/

Angie, my pet anteater never gets sick. I think it's because of anty-bodies. == It only takes one gorilla to change a light bulb; but it takes a whole lot of light bulbs.

..........What a surprise, what a cliché.........Barbra Streisand …..Send In The Clowns

Moonbeam: I doubt whether any girl would be satisfied with her lover's mind if she knew the whole of it. --Anthony Trollope

Blasphemy of the Week: When the church aligns itself with Power, it compromises its prophetic role. -–https://www.facebook.com/nakedpastor

Coffee Joke of the Week: What's fat, slimy, and drinks lots of coffee? Java the Hut

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Physics: the rules of the game. Quantum physics: cheat codes. --Submitted by Club42

What do you give to the man who has everything? Penicillin. == I'm very good about saving time. I have a safe deposit box full of watches.

..........Even Jake, the plumber, he's the man I adore, he had the nerve to tell me he's been married before.........Barbra Streisand …..Second Hand Rose

1) Hairballs are trichobezoars and are gross by any name. They are tubular (not spherical), slimy, and often 1-5 inches long.

Almanac: It is Friday, 4/24/26. The moon enters its first quarter today in Leo. Today is National Historic Marker Day, National Teach Your Children to Save Day, Undiagnosed Children's Awareness Day, World Day for Animals in Laboratories, and World Meningitis Day. Because it is the last Friday, it is also Hairball Awareness Day and Arbor Day.

Among those born on this day were San Vicente de Paul (1576), John Graunt (1620), Robert Bailey Thomas (1766), Angela Burdett-Coutts (1814), Anthony Trollope (1815), Jeltje de Bosch Kemper (1836), Willem De Kooning (1904), Robert Penn Warren (1905), Shirley MacLaine (1934), Jill Ireland (1936), Barbra Streisand (1942), Richard Daley (1942), and Yvonne D Cagle (1959).

On April twenty-fourth The Boston Newsletter published the first newspaper ad (1704), the Russia/Prussia peace treaty was signed (1762), the Library of Congress was established with a $5,000 allocation (1800), the soda fountain was patented (1833), streetcar ride-in protests began in Richmond, VA (1867), Aida premiered (1871), the National Medical Association of Black Physicians was organized (1884), the Irish Easter rebellion began (1916), and the fathometer was patented (1928).

Night Sky, 4/24: On the evenings of April 24 and 25, the waxing gibbous moon will be near Regulus, the brightest star in Leo the Lion. Regulus is the bright dot at the bottom of a backward question-mark pattern of stars known as the Sickle.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: The whole family with palm trees. Toto, I have a feeling they're not in Washington.

Notice of the Week: Even if you start a nuclear war, we will crawl out of the ashes as seven-legged mutants demanding the release of the Epstein Files. https://www.facebook.com/TheDemocraticCoalition

This Week: Saturday, April 25 – Bob Wills Day & Celebrate Trails Day & DNA Day & Eeyore's Birthday

Sunday, April 26 – Alien Day & Lesbian Visibility Day & National Help A Horse Day & World Pilot's Day

Night Sky, 4/26: The waxing illuminated moon shines in front of Leo while Venus and Jupiter are in the west. Venus will align in altitude with Sirius and you can track its motion against Taurus.

Monday, April 27 – National Little Pampered Dog Day & Morse Code Day & World Tapir Day

Night Sky, 4/27: Comet C/2026 R3 makes its closest approach to Earth. Forbes Comet Tracker

Tuesday, April 28 – Save the Frogs Day & School Bus Driver Appreciation Day & Workers Memorial Day

Wednesday, April 29 – Secretary's Day & International Dance Day & “Peace” Rose Day

Night Sky, 4/29: Sunrise: 6:21 am Sunset: 8:08 pm (13 Hours and 47 minutes of daylight) Moonrise 6:34 pm Moonset: 5:08 am

Thursday, April 30 – Beltane & Adopt A Shelter Pet Day & National Golf Day & Walpurgis Night

I shopped at thrift stores before Macklemore made it cool. I'm not a hipster, I'm just poor. == So, were alley cats bred to bowl?

..........Misty watercolor memories.........Barbra Streisand …..The Way We Were

2) Hairballs are formed by swallowed fur. It is common in cats but also affects rabbits, cows, and humans.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I've heard that bats are now using the term Megashit crazy. --Stephen Bellitz

Moonbeam: Make it a practice to judge persons and things in the most favorable light at all times and under all circumstances. --Vincent de Paul

Fun Fact of the Week: It is National Historical Marker Day. My picture is on an historical marker at around 1330 Louisiana Street, Lawrence, KS 66044. It is a marker for the February Sisters occupation of what was then a large house where the East Asian Studies department held offices and classrooms. The house is gone and a scholarship hall has been built there. If you're ever in the neighborhood, stop by. Kirsten's picture is on there too.

Audio of the Week: Barbra did a great job playing Fanny Brice in Funny Girl. Here is Fanny Brice herself in 1921 singing Second Hand Rose. (3:18)

Majority rule rests on numbers; democracy rests on the well-grounded assumption that society is neither a collection of units nor an organism but a network of human relations. — Mary Parker Follett

When my mother married again I used to call her husband, Fred, my faux pas. == Do penguins vote at the South Poll?

..........Strut down the street and have your picture took.........Barbra Streisand …..Put On Your Sunday Clothes

3) Hairballs are seasonal. Flowers in bloom, chirping birds, retching cats – they're all signs of spring. Hairballs are especially common as cats shed their winter coats.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The head of the FBI, the head of the Pentagon, and the DC US Attorney walk into a bar, apparently, every single day. --Submitted by USDS

Weird Word of the Week: Eunoia: Beautiful thinking or a well-disposed mind. https://dictionary.cambridge.org/us/dictionary/english/eunoia

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Prevent the drain in a kitchen sink from getting clogged. Once a week pour a bottle of Coca-Cola down the kitchen drain, and let it sit overnight to dissolve grease build=up and prevent clogs. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola2.html

Were the Dark Ages caused by smog? == I'll tell you what, hailing taxis is a lot worse than raining cats and dogs.

...........A girl ought to have a sense of humor.........Barbra Streisand …..Funny Girl

4) The cat has developed a digestive tract that can handle normal amounts of fur without a problem. Even long-haired cats should not develop more than one or two hairballs a year.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I would have been sadder about Charlie Kirk's death if I knew it was gonna lead to me having to hear from Erika Kirk every day of my life. --@crunchyrugger

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Stellar Fest 2026 (24-26, Duluth, GA) Atlanta's Ultimate Event for Sci-Fi Enthusiasts! https://stellarfest.org/

Escape Room of the Week: I am put in a giant bookstore. Everything is 50% off and there is an open bar. The exits are wide open and are clearly marked. I have one hour to get out. --Submitted by UUHS

Spark of Joy of the Week: Happy National Historical Marker Day! Not all markers need to be taken seriously: Mill Pond ..Site of the sawmill built by John Selee in the 18^th century and continued by his son, Nathan, a wizard who purportedly used satanic imps to run the mill at night. (Berkshire County, MA) Nationwide there are markers to at least 14 ghosts, two witches, and one vampire. --NPR

I childproofed my house, but they still got in. == When I asked Siri why I'm still single, it activated the front-facing camera.

..........Where will I be tomorrow.........Barbra Streisand …..What Kind Of Fool

5) There are a number of hairball remedies out there. Many hairball-fighting cat treats contain flavored indigestible mineral oil or petroleum jelly, which keeps everything lubricated. Some cat owners skip the fancy stuff and just put Vaseline on their kitty's nose, so he or she will lick it off. Switching to high-fiber cat food is also helpful. You can do it yourself by feeding your cat canned pumpkin.

Protest Sign of the Week: We Literally Started A Country To Get Away From This Sh*t --Lawrence, KS 4/09/26

Better Protest Sign of the Week: Trump – Listen To The Pope! He Has Friends In High Places. --Lawrence, KS 4/19/26

Best Protest Sign of the Week: Keep Going! You'e Running Better Than The Government. ~~Held by a spectator at the Boston Marathon

Quote of the Week: It is not about bathrooms...as it was never about water fountains. --George Takei

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Where are we going today, Mr Peabody? Well, Sherman, today we're going back to 1970 to find out exactly what strain of weed Douglas Adams was smoking when he wrote The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy. --Submitted by Club42

Today's Peace of History: April 24, 1971: 500,000 demonstrated against the Vietnam War in Washington, D.C. It was the largest-ever demonstration opposing the US war; 150,000 marched at a simultaneous rally in San Francisco.

The fastest way to a man's heart may be through his stomach; but the surest way is through the rib cage. == Teddy termite walked into a bar and asked, “Is the bar tender here?”

..........Are the luckiest people in the world.........Barbra Streisand …..People

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, April 24, 2026: Digested ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Success is the necessary misfortune of life, but it is only to the very unfortunate that it comes early. --Anthony Trollope

Cost of War:

Pentagon Spending as of 4/23/26: $571,393,928,970

Pentagon Spending as of 4/16/26 : $551,428,238,536

Pentagon Spending as of 4/09/26: $532,032,375,984

Pentagon Spending as of 4/01/26: $509,374,006,944

So far this month we have spent $62,019,922,026 which comes to 2 billion, 696 million, 922 thousand, 518 dollars and 95 cents A DAY on killing people and destroying property. https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/category/military/

How Many Measles Cases Are There in the US: As of April 16, 2026 there are 1,748 confirmed measles cases. On March 14^th there were 1,362 confirmed cases. https://www.cdc.gov/measles/data-research/index.html ~~In the year 2010 there 63 confirmed cases … all year.

We who are members of the Communist Party repudiate the exclusive identification of democracy with capitalism. We declare that democracy can be widened, take on new aspects, become truly a rule of the people, only when it is extended to the economic life of the people. — Elizabeth Gurley Flynn

Famous Last Words: ...Paul Newman and a ride home. --S E Hinton Final line of The Outsiders which was published 4/24/1967

..........So raise your little hand and whisper.........Barbra Streisand …..So Long Dearie

My diagnosis of colorblindness really came out of the orange. == I entered ten puns in a pun contest to see which one would win. No pun in 10 did.

May Peace sing your lullaby

And Joy play your wake up call

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh: