Friday, October 5, 2018

Denim ePistle


Famous First Words: The holy, great and universal synod... papal Encyclical of the 4th Council of Constantinople
Happy Lee's National Denim Day! I got some new jeans yesterday, until I realized they didn’t fit me around the waist so I went looking for a belt. I couldn’t find one. Then I had a really good idea. I could attach a ton of watches together to make a belt! But then I just thought it was a waist of time.
..........Life's a holiday, whoa yeah........Steve Miller Band …..Good Morning
The simplification of life is one of the steps to inner peace. A persistent simplification will create an inner and outer well-being that places harmony in one's life. --Peace Pilgrim
It is a gray Friday morning. One solid cloud covers the sky without break or texture. 56°F suggests a jacket but there is no wind to make it seems colder, or to make the willow dance, or to carry the cry of the crows over distance. The cloud is thick enough to dim the light and make one think it is much earlier than it really is. I hear a prop plane above it all. Far up in the sky a flock of several dozen small birds fly silently eastward. But there is bird song down here, close and busy. Puck and Justice sit in the back corner of the lawn waiting for Bruno – ever the late riser and roll around in the newly mown grass; the yard still faintly smells of it. Apparently, however, if you stick your nose into the grass there is much more to smell than grass. But my room smells of last night's incense and this morning's coffee. I take it is gulps – artificially sweetened and naturally creamy. Best of all, I get to sit here at my computer writing to you and looking out the open back door into autumn.
Hope your weekend is less faded than your jeans, everybody.
My sister was the athletic sort. She ran track and lifted weights. Now she just pushes a pair of jeans to the absolute limit.
My favorite color is October.
..........And the same old story with a new set of words........Steve Miller Band …..Space Cowboy
Trivia Questions: It's World Smile Day !
^ What's the difference between a sincere and a social smile?
^^ About how many times do you smile during the day?
^^^ About how many years can smiling add to your life?
^^^^ Any idea why women smile more than men?
^^^^^ How many muscles does it take to smile anyway?
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Southern Belle Lindsay Graham is overwhelmed with a case of “the vapors”. Somebody get her a lemonade and some shade. --Submitted by abf of ks
Fake Library Statistic of the Week: 72% of librarians have an archenemy. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
Of course Americans are a little crazy, they have an obesity epidemic and a skinny jeans fad going at the same time.
Never jump into a pile of leaves holding a wet sucker –Linus (Peanuts)
..........She spread hers wings and shes free.........Steve Miller Band …..Quicksilver Girl
Moonbeam: Grace is but glory begun, and glory is but grace perfected. --Jonathan Edwards
Something to Think About of the Week:

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Any book worth banning is worth reading.
Week of the Week: National Walk Your Dog Day (10/1-7) –I named my dog “5 miles” so I can tell people I walk 5 miles every day.
The scarce crow used to say: This job isn't for everyone, but, hay...it's in my jeans.
My favorite season is the fall of the patriarchy
..........I'm a midnight toker..........Steve Miller Band …..The Joker
^ Whenever we smile, there are 2 potential muscles we activate. The first one is the zygomaticus major and it controls the corners of your mouth. Whenever this muscle only is activated, it’s not actually a genuine smile. Scientists call this also the “social” smile. The second muscle, known to show sincerity is the obicularis occuli and it encircles our eye socket. The true smile also called the duchenne smile, named after the famous scientist who first separated the “mouth corners”-only smile, from the “eye socket” one.
Almanac: It is Friday, October 5, 2018. The moon was last quarter last Tuesday and is in Virgo. It is World Smile Day, National Story Telling Festival, Lee's National Denim Day, National Diversity Day, Walk to School in the USA Day, and World Teachers Day. The Azores, Guinea-Bisau, Maderia, Portugal all celebrate Republic Day (1910) while Bulgaria calls it Independence Day (1908). It is also sports Day in Lesotho.
Among those born on this day were Jonathan Edward (1703), Chester A. Arthur (1830), Robert Goddard (1882), Ray Kroc (1902), Joshua Logan (1908), Allen Ludden and Donald Pleasence (1919), Philip Berrigan and Glynis Johns (1923), Bill Dana (1924), Barry Switzer (1937), Steve Miller (1943) and Michael Andretti (1962).
On October fifth the fourth Council of Constantinople opened (869), Orfeo Ed Euridice was first produced (1762), the first non-stop transpacific flight from Japan to Washington landed (1931), Meet the Press debuted on radio (1945), the first televised presidential address aired (1947), Earl Warren was sworn onto the Supreme Court (1953), the Beatles released their first record (Love Me Do, 1962), PBS became a network (1970), and Lech Walesa won the Nobel Peace Prize (1983).
Night Sky, 10/5: These evenings the Great Square of Pegasus stands high in the east, still tipped onto one corner. It's a little larger than your fist held at arm's length. From its left corner runs the line of three similarly bright stars marking the main line of Andromeda. As evening grows late, the Square's upper-right side points far down to Fomalhaut on the rise (four or five fists distant). http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Max Picture of the Week: woke angel

This Week: Saturday, October 6 – American Libraries Day & Frugal Fun Day & World Porridge Day
Sunday, October 7 – Change a Light Day & Blessing of the Fishing Fleet Day & National Forgiveness Day
Night Sky, 10/7: Vega is the brightest star very high in the west right after nightfall. Arcturus, equally bright, is getting low in the west-northwest. The brightest star in the vast expanse between them, about a third of the way from Arcturus up toward Vega, is Alphecca, the crown jewel of Corona Borealis. Alphecca is a 17-day eclipsing binary, but its brightness dips are too slight for the eye to see reliably.
Monday, October 8 – National Salmon Day & World Octopus Day
Tuesday, October 9 – National Chess Day & National Face Your Fears Day
Night Sky, 10/9: Venus (magnitude –4.8, still at its peak brilliancy) shines very low in the west-southwest after sunset and sets in mid-twilight. Don't confuse it with Jupiter, which will catch your eye first. Venus is 14° to Jupiter's lower right. In a telescope Venus is an increasingly striking crescent, enlarging as it approaches Earth. It's now about 20% sunlit and 46 arcseconds tall. For better telescopic seeing, catch Venus higher in a blue sky long before sunset.
Wednesday, October 10 – International Top Spinning Day & Squid and Cuttlefish Day
Thursday, October 11 – International Day of the Girl Child & World Sight Day
My daughter is the world's leading expert on denim; they call here a jeanius.
I love fall colors; they make my dead grass look seasonal.
..........Feed the babies who don't have enough to eat.........Steve Miller Band …..Fly Like An Eagle
^^ We often feel happier around children – they smile more. On average, they do so 400 times a day. Whilst happy people still smile 40-50 times a day, the average of us only does so 20 times.
'Nother Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I think youngsters need to start thinking about what kind of world they are going to leave for me and Keith Richards. --Willie Nelson -_Submitted by ck of nm
Moonbeam: Just remember – when you think all is lost, the future remains. --Robert Goddard
Late Night Snacks: Melania Drumpf has the right idea. With everything that's going on, she's getting the hell out of town. Our first lady is headed overseas next week as part of her "Be as Far Away From My Husband as Possible" campaign. She's going to Africa. Melania feels a strong connection to Africa because she's married to the Lyin' King. --Jimmy Kimmel / Yesterday, Robert Mueller was spotted at an Apple store. When he said his computer is really slow, the employee said, "Like 'normal' slow or 'your investigation' slow?" --Jimmy Fallon / Los Angeles International Airport has updated its policy to allow travelers to pack marijuana when flying. And every person who was happy to hear that missed their flight. --Seth Meyers / The nation was gripped today by Dr. Christine Blasey Ford's emotional testimony on Capitol Hill against Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh. As Dr. Ford was speaking, Brett Kavanaugh was reportedly preparing for his own testimony in Vice President Mike Pence's office. Out of habit, Kavanaugh brought a keg. --James Corden / Two new words — "OK" and "Ew." OK and Ew have been added to SCRABBLE. Coincidentally, OK and Ew are the two words the Senate will use when voting on Kavanaugh. --Conan O'Brien / Today Bill Cosby was sentenced to three to 10 years in state prison for sexual assault. Incredibly sad story. At this point, obviously no one can defend Bill Cosby, unless you are his publicist. "This has been the most racist and sexist trial in the history of the United States. They persecuted Jesus, and look what happened." Oh, no! Because if Cosby is like Jesus, that means in three days, he'll be back prowling the streets. --Stephen Colbert
Not So Late Night Snacks: On Thursday Judge Kavanaugh and Dr Christine Blasey Ford testified before the senate judicary committee. And it was riviting. People across the country were glued to their televisions. So much so that for the first time in weeks six hours passed without a single new person coming forward to accuse Brett Kavanaugh of sexual harassament. --Peter Sagal Wait Wait Don't Tell Me
Ah! when shall all men's good be each man's rule, and universal peace lie like a shaft of light across the land. --Alfred Lord Tennyson

You can tell it's fall in Arizona because the license plate colors begin to change.
..........I've been working all week in the noonday sun.........Steve Miller Band …..Dance, Dance, Dance
^^^ The baseball card study found a clear correlation between how big a smile someone made on a baseball card photo and how long they would live. The people who smiled the most turned out to live 7 years longer than those who didn’t. ~~correlation not causation
Worthless Fact of the Week: More than 41 hours after departing Japan, Clyde Pangborn and Hugh Herndon Jr. performed a controlled crash landing near Wenatchee, Washington. After the dust settled, they emerged from the airplane to complete the first-ever nonstop flight across the Pacific Ocean.
Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Guess we can retire the expression “sober as a judge”. --Submitted by ra of ks
Weird Word of the Week: Cadastral – large scale. A cadastral survey is one on a scale sufficiently large to accurately show the extent and measurement of every field or other block of land. http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-cad1.htm
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Remove lipstick stains from linen napkins. Apply Vaseline Petroleum Jelly before washing. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/vaseline.html
He tried to justify the holes in his brand new jeans to his father by saying, I got it half price.
Love the trees until their leaves fall off, then encourage them to try again next year. --Chad Sugg
...........Don't carry me too far away.........Steve Miller Band …..Jet Airliner
^^^^ Here is something interesting. Researcher LaFrance concluded that, overall, women smile a lot more than men. This comes not just from the fact that they might be happier, but also, that socially, it is more acceptable for women to smile. And in general women are more accurate than men in detecting what is really going on with someone by looking at their face and listening to their voice. Women are more likely to tell the difference between a felt and a fake smile.” ~~These first 4 answers are from The Science of Smiling
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I've been hiding from exercising. I'm in the Fitness Protection Program. --Submitted by cm of ks
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Continuum 2018 – Darkness Descending: THE CONTINUUM, celebrates Fantasy and Science Fiction in all its forms. (10/5-7, Detroit, MI) http://migeekscene.com/event/the-continuum-2018/
Actual Science Convention of the Week: Advances in Chemical Engineering & Technology: 5th International (10/4-5, London, UK) “Exploring the latest trends in Chemical engineering: Eurochemical Engineering”. https://newengineer.com/conference/5th-international-conference-on-advances-in-chemical-engineering-and-technology-1116455
Old Memory and New Analysis of the Week: When I went to college they locked up girls at 10 pm to protect them from, basically, boys. I have long maintained that if they had locked up freshmen boys at sunset, women would have been safe. I see now, I was wrong; they need to lock up all the boys around 4:30.
Puck the Brave Episode of the Week: Here's our fearless Puck chairing an agents meeting in the case of the Squirming Squirrel.
Kavanaugh was so drunk he couldn't get his “guess” jeans up because he didn't know the answer.
Autumn is the season of liberty. Instead of being green,leaves can choose between yellow,red,brown,orange.
..........And the music's callin'.........Steve Miller Band …..Swingtown
^^^^^ Some claim it takes 43 muscles to frown and 17 to smile but you might be surprised to learn it takes 26 to smile and 62 to frown. ~~This site offered no evidence and recognized no difference between sincere and social smiles.
Month of the Week: October is American Pharmacist Month - A man goes into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something for the hiccups. The pharmacist promptly reaches out and slaps the man's face. "What did you do that for?" the man asks. "Well, you don't have the hiccups anymore, do you?" The man says, "No, but my wife out in the car still does!"
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Without art, we are but monkeys with car keys. --Submitted by lk of ny.
Grammar Joke of the Week: Falling slowly, slowly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar room floor.
Today's Peace of Woman's History, October 5, 2012: The National Fannie Lou Hamer Memorial Statue was dedicated and unveiled in Rulesville, Ms Fannie Lou was the spokeswoman for the Freedom Democratic Party in 1964 and ~~a personal hero of mine. http://www.fannielouhamer.info/
Knock Knock: Who's there? Euripides. Euripides who? Euripides jeans, you pay for 'em.
Happy Fall of the Bourgeoisie
..........Show the lightning in your eyes.........Steve Miller Band …..Cool Magic
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle Denim ePistle, 2018. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Peace, Laughs, & Comfortable Clothes. Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr Lawrence, KS 66047
Moonbeam: Well, there doesn't seem anything else for an ex-President to do but to go into the country and raise big pumpkins. --Chester A Arthur
Cost of War:
As of 10/4/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,860,992,235,435.
As of 9/27/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,855,108,818,518.
As of 10/4/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $853,674,274,500.
As of 9/27/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $852,309,160,928.
As of 10/4/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $622,847,586,378.
As of 9/27/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $621,131,437,617.
As of 10/4/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $297,192,610,678.
As of 9/27/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $296,802,577,437.
As of 10/4/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,634,707,249,720.
As of 9/27/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,629,227,551,852.
If you wish to experience peace, provide peace for another. If you wish to know that you are safe, cause another to know that they are safe. --Dalai Lama XIV
..........Just an eeny-weeny bit of your love.........Steve Miller Band …..Just A Little Bit
“Jean-Paul Sartre is sitting at a French cafe, revising his draft of Being and Nothingness. He says to the waitress, "I'd like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream." The waitress replies, "I'm sorry, Monsieur, but we're out of cream. How about with no milk? ~~Sorry, the existentialist in me couldn't resist.
Famous Last Words: That's all for today. --Meet the Press
May Peace be your teacher
And Joy be your knowledge
prairie mama
christine


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Friday, September 28, 2018

What ePistle?


Famous First Words: We the People of the United States... The Constitution of the United States
Welcome to Ask a Stupid Question Day! --Can I use Pam spray as tanning oil? \ Did they purposely make dyslexia had to spell?
..........Guess I ain't too diplomatic.........Garth Brooks …..Against The Grain
Peace may sound simple - one beautiful word - but it requires everything we have, every quality, every strength, every dream, every high ideal. --Yehudi Menuhin
It is an ideal Friday morning. The 62°F temperature is near perfect. Pale, pale clouds wrinkle across the sky, paler even than the fading moon in the west. A light northern breeze moves the willow in a graceful dance but hardly bothers the maple or oak nearby. Birdsong is distant and generic; half dozen small birds sit on a power line discussing their plans for the day just out of ear range. A prop plane flies over and drowns out all sound but Puck barking at a squirrel who runs across Bruno's yard up the maple, through limbs to the oak, and down on the next street over without ever letting go of a mouthful of walnut. Justice, apparently, knows squirrel barking and has rushed out to provide backup. I begin to get a little chilly; so I take one more gulp of my sweetened decaf, and one more deep breath of crisp fall air, and I return to my sitting room that smells of incense and life. Let me just freshen my coffee, and then we can talk.
Hope your weekend answers all your questions, ePistliers.
Had a pupil ask me if the Sun they saw in America was the same as the Sun we saw here in Scotland, and why was their Sun so much warmer \ Are the angles we learned about in geometry in °F or °C?
..........Just for laughs, I dialed her old number.........Garth Brooks …..What She's Doing Now
Trivia Questions: Save the Koalas Day ! What do you really know about koalas.
^ Know which animals are most closely related to the koala?
^^ More or less, how many koalas are out there in the wild?
^^^ How big do koalas get?
^^^^ How old do they get?
^^^^^ What does the koala eat?
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Stagehand: We do precision guess work based on unreliable data provided by those of questionable knowledge. --Submitted by dr of oh
Fake Library Statistic of the Week: 42% of librarian dates end up with one person looking something up on Wikipedia while the other checks IMDB. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
Two part Question: Do they have black people in Canada? Do they call them African Canadians? ##No, they would still be called African Americans because Africa is in South America and Canada is in North America so either way the same. \ Why isn't there a mouse-flavored cat food?
..........Last night we talked of old times, families, and hometowns.........Garth Brooks …..Burning Bridges
Moonbeam: Silence is a true friend who never betrays. --Confucius
Something to Think About of the Week:

Big Hello: Kasalehlie – Pohnpeian (Micronesia) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Give someone a book, they'll read for a day. Teach someone to write a book...and they'll spend a life-time mired in paralyzing self doubt. --Submitted by sb of ar
Week of the Week: International Week of the Deaf (9/24-30) – Learn to sign your name in American Sign Language: https://www.babble.com/crafts-activities/how-to-sign-your-name-in-asl/
"Well, I've taken the test twice, but everyone else in here hasn't taken it, so am I taking my test for the first time or the third time?" \ Drought? Why can't we just fill up the reservoir with tap water?
..........But I can't walk away from you.........Garth Brooks …..Shameless
^ The closest relative of the koala is the wombat. The koala is also related to the kangaroo. The reason the koala is called a koala bear is because the koala looks like a teddy bear.
Almanac: It is Friday, September 28, 2018. The moon was full (Harvest) last Monday and is in Taurus. It is Ask a Stupid Question Day, Hug a Vegetarian Day, Kiwanis Kid Day, Love Note Day, National Good Neighbor Day, National Walk to Work Day, and Save the Koala Day. It is also Fish Tank Floorshow Night. In California it is Cabrillo Day (When White People Discovered California, 1542) . Guinea celebrates Referendum Day (1958) in Libya it is Shawwal and Republic of China (Taiwan) commemorates Confucius' Birthday/Teachers' Day.
Among those born on this day were Confucius (551 BCE), Pompey (106 BCE), Varavaggio (1573), Frances Willard (1839), Georges Clemenceau (1841), Ed Sullivan (1902), Al Capp (1909), Marcello Mastroianni (1924), Arnold Stang (1925), Brigitte Bardot (1934), Phil Hartman (1948), and Moon Unit Zappa (1967).
On September twenty-eighth the US constitution was sent to the states for approval (1787), flogging was abolished in the US Navy (1850), the Bronx Museum for the Arts opened (1988), 166 Wobblies were indicted for protesting World War I (1917), and Garth Brook's album "Ropin' the Wind" became the first country album to debut at No. 1 on the Billboard pop chart (1991).
Night Sky, 9/21: Mars shines well to the right of the waxing gibbous Moon this evening.Between them lies dim, boat-shaped Capricornus — or as I sometimes see it in a dark sky, a huge, smiling clown mouth gaping down at the world. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Max Picture of the Week: sleeping angel

This Week: Saturday, September 29 – National Ghost Hunting Day & Save Your Photos Day
Sunday, September 30 – Blasphemy Day & National Love People Day
Monday, October 1 – National Lace Day & Fire Pup Day & International Coffee Day
Tuesday, October 2 – International Day of Non-Violence & Phileas Fogg's Wager Day
Night Sky, 10/2: The Moon is at Last Quarter tonight.
Wednesday, October 3 – Techies Day & Balloons Around The World Day
Thursday, October 4 – Vodka Day & Improve Your Office Day
Had a student ask me "What are those pyramid-shaped things in Egypt called?" \ If the Number 2 pencil is the most popular, how come it's still number 2?
..........A blooming rose in a bed of sand.........Garth Brooks …..In Lonesome Dove
^^ Now there are only 2,000 to 8,000 koalas in the wild! Although not officially classified as endangered, the population of Australian koalas has dropped by 90% in less than a decade. This is due to the destruction of the koala's natural habitat, a narrow crescent on the eastern coast of Australia.
Moonbeam: To navigate is necessary, to live is not. --Pompey
Late Night Snacks: Trump is campaigning for the midterms in Las Vegas, and out of habit, the moment he walked into a casino, it went bankrupt. --Jimmy Fallon / Former first lady Michelle Obama has announced she's adding dates to her upcoming book tour due to overwhelming fan demand. And Sean Spicer announced that his book tour has really given him a chance to enjoy some "me time." --Seth Meyers / And where did Drumpf tell the foreign minister of Spain to build that wall? Straight through the Sahara Desert in Africa. Drumpf is not great with geography and borders, which is weird. Usually the only time Drumpf has problems understanding boundaries is with female employees. --James Corden / Drumpf also addressed the conspiracy theory that his administration is being opposed inside the government by the so-called "Deep State." But Drumpf doesn't like that phrase. "I don't like to use it because it sounds so conspiratorial, and believe it or not, I'm really not a conspiratorial person." I wonder who spread the rumor that he was conspiratorial? Must be the same people who faked Obama's birth certificate, stole all those people from Drumpf's inauguration crowd, and helped Ted Cruz's father kill JFK. --Stephen Colbert / Stormy Daniels in her new memoir implies that as an exchange for sex, Donald Drumpf offered to rig "The Apprentice" so she could win. Even worse, Drumpf made the same offer to Gary Busey — and he took it. --Conan O'Brien
Not So Late Night Snacks: He didn't comment about the revealations from Stormy Daniel's book. In the book Ms Daniels compares the president's staff of chief, visually, to the Mario Card Video Game character, Toad. --Peter Sagal ...It's a joyful little stubby mushroom. --Faith Salie ...Have you ever played the game. That character always finishes like really quickly and then the rest of the characters don't get to finish at all. --Adam Burke Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me

“If we are peaceful, if we are happy, we can smile and blossom like a flower, and everyone in our family, our entire society, will benefit from our peace.” --Thich Nhat Hanh

In a sex ed class: "Do vaginas have taste buds?" Everyone looks at him like wtf is going through your head... "Well why else would they make flavored condoms?" \ Why isn't phonics spelled the way it sound?
..........Eighteen wheels anchored, somewhere out of Dover.........Garth Brooks …..Cold Shoulder
^^^ The adult koala generally grows to 25 - 30 inches long. The koala is very small when it's just born. After 1 month the cub is 1 cm. long. The adult koala weighs 15 to 30 pounds.
Worthless Fact of the Week: 1978, President Jimmy Carter signed Proclamation 4601 establishing September 24, 1978 as National Good Neighbor Day, stating that it should be observed "with appropriate ceremonies and activities."
Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Our refrigerator is two magnets short of changing earth's polarity.
Weird Word of the Week: Backronym – A backronym (sometimes bacronym) is a reverse acronym. To create one, you take a word that isn’t an acronym and create a fictitious expansion for it. Some backronyms are designed as mnemonics. A classic example is the Apgar score to test the health of newborns. It was named after the American physician Virginia Apgar but to help student doctors and nurses remember the system, it has been changed to the acronym “Appearance, Pulse, Grimace, Activity, and Respiration”. Similarly, the US Amber Alert programme is said to mean “America’s Missing: Broadcast Emergency Response”, though it was actually named after a missing child, Amber Hagerman. http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-bac1.htm
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Heal chapped lips. Apply a little Vaseline Petroleum Jelly to the lips before going outdoors and again before going to bed. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/vaseline.html
While I was student teaching, I had a student ask where Texas was on the map I was projecting on the screen. The map was of China \ Why isn't 11 pronounced Onety-one?
...........But we leave the handle stickin' out.........Garth Brooks …..We Bury The Hatchet
^^^^ Koalas live for 20 or more years.
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Cult Classic Convention (9/28-30, Bastrop, TX) This is your chance to have your name carved in chainsaw history. http://cultclassicconvention.com/
Actual Science Convention of the Week: 22nd Annual William & Mary Math Day Conference (9/28/18) Provide teachers with educational experiences, coaching, professional developments, and workshops that will assist in fostering a deep mathematical understanding in the everyday classroom. https://www.eventbrite.com/e/william-and-mary-math-day-conference-2018-tickets-43308778723
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Not to brag, but I was laughing at Donald Trump way before the UN decided to do it. --Submitted by ma of va
Puck the Brave Episode of the Week: Here's our fearless Puck sniffing out clues in the case of the Feisty Foldex
A couple of years ago, I had a student ask me if commas were real or imaginary. He was equally dubious about semicolons, which he referred to as "imitation periods" \ What disease did cured ham actually have?
..........That old diesel engine made an eerie sound.........Garth Brooks …..Papa Loved Mama
^^^^^ The koala only eats Eucalyptus leaves and it eats so many leaves, it smells like the leaves. They live and sleep in the eucalyptus trees. It's hot, light and dry there.
Month of the Week: October is Caffeine Addiction Recovery Month – A day without coffee is like ...Just kidding, I have no idea. / I don't know what I'd do without coffee...probably twenty-five to life.
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My roomba just beat me to a cheeto I dropped on the floor. This is how the war against machines begins.
Grammar Joke of the Week: A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersion on his magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
Today's Peace of History, September 28, 1942: In Denmark, underground anti-Nazi activists began systematic smuggling Jews to Sweden. In just three weeks, all but 481 of Denmark's 8000 Jews had been moved to safety.
My mom is a teacher's assistant in a 5th grade class. A few weeks ago a girl asked,"Are bears still real?" \ Why are softballs hard?
..........He'll win the next go 'round.........Garth Brooks …..Rodeo
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle September 28, 2018,What ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Laughs, love and no answers. Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 1800 Goodell Ct. Lawrence, KS 66046
Moonbeam: I think I have a dark view of the world. I have to make everything funny, otherwise it all seems so sad. --Moon Unit Zappa
Cost of War:
As of 9/27/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,855,108,818,518.
As of 9/20/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,858,983,581,564.
As of 9/27/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $852,309,160,928.
As of 9/20/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $850,970,654,874.
As of 9/27/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $621,131,437,617.
As of 9/20/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $619,448,909,576.
As of 9/27/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $296,802,577,437.
As of 9/20/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $296,420,189,677.
As of 9/27/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,629,227,551,852.
As of 9/20/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,623,855,256,191.
Turn from evil and do good, seek peace and pursue it. --Psalms 34:14
..........And dare to dance the tide.........Garth Brooks …..The River
A girl in my honors science class asked the teacher, and was 100% serious, if ramen grew on ramen trees. \ Why do we Scrub Down but Wash Up?
Famous Last Words: so ratifying the Same. --U.S. Constitution of 1878.
May Peace ask the questions
And Joy provide the answers
prairie mama
christine


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Friday, September 21, 2018

ePistle Accord


Famous First Words: In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. --The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien
Happy International Day of Peace!!! In Jerusalem, a female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Wailing Wall to pray, twice a day, everyday, for a long, long time. So she went to check it out. She went to the Wailing Wall and there he was! She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave, she approached him for an interview. "I'm Rebekah Smith from CNN. Sir, how long have you been coming to the wall and praying?" "For about 60 years." "60 years! That's amazing! What do you pray for?" "I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Muslims. I pray for all the hatred to stop and I pray for all our children to grow up in safety and friendship." "How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?" "Like I'm talking to a damned wall."
..........I'm in the middle without any plans.........Alice Cooper …..I'm Eighteen
World Peace Day is envisioned to become a moment of global unity – it is up to each and every one of us to make this a reality.
It is a cloudy Friday morning. The sky is morphing from gray, rainy-looking lumps and rolls through slate gray and featureless to fluffy, friendly puffs. The wind too switches between strong and northerly to gentle and refreshing. The 64°F is nearly perfect. The ground and the patio are wet from last night's rain and smell of damp concrete and moist soil. The short green lawn is scattered with yellow willow leaves. A squirrel makes its silent way across the top of the neighbor's privacy fence to Bruno's yard and so down to the stand of cottonwoods at the end of the block; with each gust of wind the tall and stately trees sound like cats playing with gift wrap. I swallow a sip of warm, sweetened decaf and let it wash slowly down my throat. It is the last and my cup is empty. It is time to go inside. Puck greets me at the backdoor and goes out as I enter. One minute...I'll fill my cup again and we can talk.
Hope your weekend is peaceful and serene, ePistliers.
I think that world peace can only be achieved if everyone learns to laugh at themselves./ Headline: War Dims Hope for Peace
..........Another junkie plan pushing dope for the man.........Curtis Mayfield …..Freedie's Dead
Trivia Questions: Good-bye, Nathan Hale.
^ What rank did Hale hold in the Continental Army?
^^ Where was Hale born and raised?
^^^ What was Hale's job for the army?
^^^^ When was Hale caught by the British?
^^^^^ How do we know about his most famous quote?
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I bought a new pair of shoes with Memory Foam insoles, so I will no longer forget why I walked into the kitchen.
Fake Library Statistic of the Week: 14% of public library employees are only there so they can get the bestsellers before everyone else https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
If you could chose between World Peace & Bill Gates' fortune, what color would your Lamborghini be? / “If we could just get everyone to close their eyes and visualize world peace for an hour, imagine how serene and quiet it would be until the looting started.”
..........Bo Diddley caught a nanny goat.........Bo Diddley …..Bo Diddley
Moonbeam: If we don't end war, war will end us. --H.G. Wells
Something to Think About of the Week:

Big Hello: Cześć - Polish https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: A man goes to a funeral and asks the widow if he can say a word. The widow agrees, and the man says : Plethora. The woman says “Thanks, that means a lot.”
Week of the Week: Tolkien Week (/16-22) --A hobbit was terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. "I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least 5 pounds." When the hobbit returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds. "Why, that’s amazing!" the doctor said, "Did you follow my instructions?" The hobbit nodded. "I’ll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that 3rd day." "from hunger you mean?" "No from skipping."
Let us love the world to peaces. / Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.
..........Blowing through the jasmine in my mind........Seals & Crofts …..Summer Breeze
^ Nathan Hale was a captain in the Continental Army during the Revolutionary War.
Almanac: It is Friday, September 21, 2018. The moon will be full (Harvest) on Monday and is in Aquarius. It is World Gratitude Day, National POW/MIA Recognition Day, and World's Alzheimer's Day. In Malta they celebrate Independence Day (1964) and in the Philippines it is Thanksgiving.
Among those born on this day were Frederick III (1415), H.G. Wells (1866), Larry Hagman (1931), Melvin Van Peebles (1932), Henry Gibson (1935), Fannie Flagg (1944), Stephen King (1947) and Bill Murray (1950).
On September twenty-first Nathan Hale was hanged (1776), Moroni first appeared to Joseph Smith (1832), The Hobbit was published (1937), the submarine Nautilus was commissioned (1954), ABC's In Concert debuted (1973), the first female was appointed to the Supreme Court (Sandra O'Connor, 1981) and NASA launched the Galaxy-C (1984).
Night Sky, 9/21: The closing days of summer (the equinox is tomorrow) always find the Sagittarius Teapot moving west of south during evening and tipping increasingly far over to the right, as if pouring out the last of summer. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Random Fandom Convention 2018: (Big Rapids, MI) ..family friendly comic con style event... https://www.upcomingcons.com/upcomingcons/29104-Random-Fandom-Con
Actual Science Convention of the Week: Plastic Surgery Review (9/21-24, Chicago, IL) https://www.osler.org/product/plastic-surgery-review-sept-21-24-2018-chicago/
This Week: Saturday, September 22 – Batman Day & Car Free Day & Hobbit Day
Night Sky, 9/22: The September equinox occurs at 9:54 pm Eastern Daylight Time, when the Sun crosses the equator heading south for the season. This moment marks the beginning of autumn in the Northern Hemisphere. And the Sun sets almost exactly due west.
Sunday, September 23- National Snack Stick Day & Teal Talk Day
Monday, September 24 – Punctuation Day & Family Day
Night Sky, 9/24: Venus shines very low in the west-southwest in the evening twilight. Jupiter is to the lower right of Venus and is brighter. About an hour after dark Mars can be seen in the south. It's a tad brighter than Sirius. Saturn glows yellow in the south at dusk. Uranus is near the Aries-Pisces border also in the evening. Neptune rises late in the east south-east. Mercury is currently hidden.
Tuesday, September 25 – National Tune-Up Day & National Voter Registration Day
Wednesday, September 26 – Johnny Appleseed Day & School Backpack Awareness Day
Thursday, September 27 – Ancestor Appreciation Day & Remember Me Thursday
I wish for world peace...oh, and bigger boobs. Phoebe Friends
..........Pussyfootin' around till the break of dawn.........Alice Cooper …..Gutter Cat vs. The Jets
^^ Nathan Hale grew up in Connecticut and graduated from Yale College in 1773. He began a career as a teacher, but when the War for Independence heated up in 1775, Hale accepted a commission as a lieutenant in the army .
'Nother Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I want to be 14 again so I can ruin my life differently. I have new ideas.
Moonbeam: The ones who hurt the most always say the least. --Fannie Flagg
Late Night Snacks: This Trump administration has really given us an exciting look at what the government could be if it were run by a wealthy 12-year-old. --Jimmy Kimmel / Journalist Bob Woodward's new book detailing life within the Trump administration sold more than 750,000 copies in its first day of release. I guess it was pretty smart of him to call the book "Harry Potter and the Toupee of Doom." --Seth Meyers / According to one excerpt, Donald Trump suggested that the government should just "print more money." Oh, OK, I'm starting to realize why Trump's casinos went bankrupt. If you think Drumpf's economic ideas are crazy, you should hear Trump's plan for global warming. He thinks the government should just make more ice cubes. --James Corden / Kanye West said that Kim Kardashian is actually enrolled in law school. When he found out, President Trump said, "I want to change my Supreme Court nominee. Can we do that now? Is it too late?" --Jimmy Fallon / The Russia investigation is still marching on, and today there's big news about Trump's former campaign manager Paul Manafort. Rumors are Manafort is in talks with the special counsel's office about a possible plea deal. Yes, the man Trump called brave for not turning state's evidence is now flipping like a gymnast making pancakes on a trampoline. --Stephen Colbert
Not So Late Night Snacks: It's Bob Woodward's book titled Fear - which is both what it is about and what it causes-- is already a huge best seller despite there being no real surprises in it. That makes it a perfect book club book. You can totally get away only pretending you read it. --Peter Sagal Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me
Not a minute, not an hour. Let's promise ourselves to be in peace during the whole day. Feel it and offer it to your world.
If the whole world smoked a joint at the same time, there would be World Peace for at least two hours. / For anyone wanting a better world, Peace, Rights, Sustainability...
..........I've chased a rainbow down a one-way street dead end.........John Prine …..Illegal Smile
^^^ Hale served at Boston and then New York, where he volunteered to go behind British lines to gather intelligence.
Worthless Fact of the Week: At present, more than 82,000 Americans remain missing from WWII, the Korean War, the Vietnam War, the Cold War, and the Gulf Wars/other conflicts. Out of the 82,000 missing, 75% of the losses are located in the Indo-Pacific, and over 41,000 of the missing are presumed lost at sea (ie ship losses, known aircraft water losses, etc.).
Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm “use the lighted magnifying glass attached to the desk to read the instructions on the paint can” years old. --Submitted by dr of oh
Weird Word of the Week: Abacot - “the name of an ancient cap of state worn by the kings of England, the upper part whereof was in the form of a double crown”. http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-aba1.htm ~~I tried to find a picture of this hat but when I searched images for abacot – pictures of ducks came up. There may be a portrait of Henry IV with an abacot, but I'm not sure. https://www.npg.org.uk/collections/search/person/mp02141/king-henry-iv the second image down.
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Prevent outdoor light bulbs from sticking in fixtures. To make removal easy, rub a thin coast of Vaseline Petroleum Jelly on the threads before inserting the bulbs. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/vaseline.html
According to Mel Gibson: The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world. I didn't know “W” was Jewish. --Ingrid Rice / Leaders start wars, People stop wars.
...........No more pencils no more books.........Alice Cooper …..School's Out
^^^^ He was captured by the British on 21 September 1776 and immediately admitted that he was spying for General Washington.
Grammar Joke of the Week: A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week : Binge watching is great until you run out of the show and have to start watching it weekly like some sort of medieval peasant.
Peace Games on the Internet of the Week: Darfur Is Dying: Players must keep their refugee camp going despite the threat of the militia in this game that teaches about the plight of the 2.5 million refugees in the Darfur region of Sudan. http://www.darfurisdying.com/
Puck the Brave Episode of the Week: Here's our fearless Puck in consultation with partner, Justice, and field operative, Bruno, in the case of the Running Russian.
United Nations: You Wanna Peace of Me? / Either we end war or war will end us.
..........want some coke, have some weed.........Curtis Mayfield …..Pusherman
^^^^^ “I only regret that I have but one life to lose for my country” Nathan Hale’s famous last words comes by way of a memoir by his friend, William Hull, who reported the famous last words as told to him by a British engineer who spoke with Hale, Captain John Montresor.
Month of the Week: September is Healthy Aging Month –True story: When my aunt Vera was around 80 years old my mother called her and asked how she was doing. Aunt Vera answered “I'm the healthiest son-of-a-bitch you know”. She lived another 10 years or so to prove it.
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The consensus of the latest polls is that 100% of Americans think 50% of Americans have lost their minds.
Max picture of the Week:

Local Peace News of the Week: Tomorrow – Saturday, September 22 – The Lawrence Peace Community is planting a Peace Pole in South Park (1141 Massachusetts). It is a replacement pole for the one that had been standing in the park but was damaged and falling over. The planting ceremony is at noon. The weather is predicted to be beautiful. It will be planted somewhere near the garden west of the gazebo – exact locations were still being negotiated last I checked in. It should be a pleasant and peaceful time; if you're in town, come on down.
Today's Peace of History: September 21st (since 1982): The International Day of Peace was established by United Nations resolution in 1981 and first celebrated in 1982 (then as the 3rd Tuesday of the month). Events are planned all over the world to promote peace and make it more visible.
If women rules the world, there would be no wars...just a bunch of countries not talking to each other. --Chris Rock / A Russian nuclear missile has been lost at sea. The story was reported in the kids' magazine, "Sleep Well, Children!"
..........Ugly Ole mojo, where you bin.........Bo Diddley …..Diddley itis
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle September 21, 2018, ePistle Accord. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Love Laughs and Peace. Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 1800 Goodell Ct. Lawrence, KS 66046
Moonbeam: Books are a uniquely portable magic. --Stephen King
Cost of War:
As of 9/20/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,855,108,818,518.
As of 9/13/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,857,014,170,231.
As of 9/20/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $850,970,654,874.
As of 9/13/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $849,675,969,719.
As of 9/20/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $619,448,909,576.
As of 9/13/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $617,821,049,576.
As of 9/20/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $296,420,189,677.
As of 9/13/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $296,050,219,390.
As of 9/20/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,623,855,256,191.
As of 9/13/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,618,656,878,258.
On International Day of Peace...Let's unite together...to make a peaceful world!
..........Heavenly songbird, we were so wrong.........Seals & Crofts …..Hummingbird
(Most of today's songs are from the original In Concert program on ABC in 1973. It was taped on 9/21 and aired in November of that year.)
The peace making meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict. / President Trump met with the President of South Korea to discuss North Korea. The meeting consisted of five minutes about nuclear weapons, and 90 minutes of Trump saying, "So wait – which Korea are you again?
Famous Last Words: Human rights are everyone's rights. --US International Day of Peace Website
May Peace give you hugs
And Joy give you kisses
prairie mama
christine


Last Laugh:


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