Famous First Words: I am honoured to inform you myself that I just signed my abdication... Queen Wilhelmina of the Netherlands 1948 Abdication Speech
September is National DNA, Geonomics & Stem Cell Education Month. Let's celebrate! I just got my DNA test results. I'm 40% from France, 50% from Great Britain, and 10% from a plastics factory in Texas. °° The entire Biology Department wears designer genes.
..........Look at Mother Nature on the run.........Dolly Parton, Emmylou Harris & Linda Ronstadt …..After The Gold Rush
Men simply copied the realities of their hearts when they built prisons. --Richard Wright
It is a quiet Friday morning. The sky is still white waiting for the sun to breach the treeline and color it blue. It is also still cool (75°F) and the humidity is hovering below 80% with a light wind (c. 4 mph from the southeast); it gives the morning a freshness and a chance to breathe before the sun begins to bake the summer out of the land. There is no wildlife at the sunflower seed pile nor bird song in the air. A quiet morning except for Puck's panting in his sleep. Ah, a distant dog barks to let me know that the rest of the world is still out there doing morning things and enjoying the cool while it lasts. I take a sip of doctored coffee and sit down to write to you. Pretty good day so far.
Hope your weekend is less twisted than your DNA, little gene bundles.
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: On the upside, all this bad shit could lead to a resurgence in the Blues. https://www.facebook.com/kusala.bhikshu
Got my snowman's DNA test back: 85% water, 8% dirt and 7% dog pee. °° Official Definition DNA: As you can see from the model, the structure is basically a long...twisty...uh, rope-laddery-type...thingy.
..........One more look will get the bed unmade.........Dolly Parton & Julianne Hough …..Baby Blues
Trivia Questions: It's National Food Bank Day.
What's the difference between a Food Bank and a Food Pantry?
Where do food banks get their food?
How is the food stored and transported?
How many Food Bank networks are there in the US?
How many US citizens are served by food banks and, therefore, food pantries?
Big Hello: Mogethin – Yapese (Micronesia) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Rules to learning English: 1. their our know rules
Image of the Week: @wolfpack11720.bsky.social "The word Fascism has, now, no meaning except insofar as it signifies 'something not desirable'." --George Orwell
Blasphemy I of the Week: Book Spine: God's Word, Final, Infallible And Forever Revised Edition. by Floyd C McElveem @freethinkersunite.bsky.social
My frog got his DNA test back. He's part Scottish, part Irish, and a tad Pole. °° My self image problems are genetic. I just heard one of the links on my helix asked another link if these genes made her look fat.
..........and we will always stand by you.........Dolly Parton & Porter Wagoner …..Christina
Moonbeam: Forests precede civilizations and deserts follow them. --François-René de Chateaubriand
Blasphemy II of the Week: If Jesus were around today someone would do a DNA test.
Coffee Joke of the Week: One cup for waking up. One cup for being nice. One cup just in case. https://www.facebook.com/groups/funnycoffeequotes/posts/1394717924396452/
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Secretary of Health Kennedy has written a book; I think it's called How to Avoid Vaccines and Die Like a Medieval Peasant.
The baby's DNA test came back: 80% water and 20% milk. °° Scientists recently combined the DNA of a cheetah and a crab. Things went sideways real fast.
..........Sewing every piece with love.........Dolly Parton …..Coat Of Many Colors
1) Food banks are large, central warehouses that supply the hunger relief network. A Food Pantry is a community service where families go for food. The “network” may also include shelters, after school spaces, etc.
Almanac: It is Friday, September 4, 2026. The moon enters its last quarter today and is in Gemini. Today is National Spice Blend Day, National Wildlife Day, and Newspaper Carrier Day. Because this is the first Friday of September it is also Bring Your Manners To Work Day, National Chianti Day, National Food Bank Day, Stand Up To Cancer Day, and National Lazy Mom's Day. And because it is the Friday Before Labor Day it is National College Colors Day. (KU's are crimson and blue, in case you didn't know.)
Among those born on this day were François-René, de Chateaubriand (1768), Richard Wright (1908), Paul Harvey (1918), Dick York (1928), Mitzi Gaynor (1931), Sonny Charles (1940), Gene Parsons (1944), Gary Duncan (1946), Tom Watson (1949), Damon Wayans (1960), John DiMaggio (1968), Natalie Diaz (1978), Poo Bear (1979), Beyoncé (1981), and Nyota Uhura (2179).
On September fourth Los Angeles was founded (1781). There were bread riots in Mobile, AL (1864). Hawaii got its first daily newspaper (1866). The first cafeteria opened (NYC, 1885). Eastman patented both the film and the "Kodak" (1888). Doris Kopsky became the first NABA female cycling champion (1937). Queen Wilhelmina of The Netherlands abdicated (1948). The first transcontinental TV broadcast aired (Pres Truman, 1951). The Edsel was introduced (1957). NASA launched the first Orbital Geophysical Observatory (OGO-1, 1964).
Fraternal Picture of the Week: Hiking to the campsite with mom.
Night Sky, 9/4: September is a prime month to view the Milky Way. Tonight is the last night of the Aurigid Meteor Shower.
This Week: Saturday, September 5 – Be Late For Something Day & International Bacon Day & Jury Rights Day
Sunday, September 6 – Bowling League Day & National Pastor's Spouses Day & Pet Rock Day
Night Sky, 9/6: Cassiopeia and the Great Square of Pegasus dominate the night sky.
Monday, September 7 – Labor Day
Tuesday, September 8 – Dog Walker Appreciation Day & International Literacy Day & National Ampersand & Day
Night Sky, 9/8: Jupiter, Saturn, and Mars are visible in the early morning and Venus can be seen in the evening sky
Wednesday, September 9 – National Teddy Bear Day & Wonderful Weirdos Day
Thursday, September 10 – Swap Ideas Day & (World) Suicide Prevention Day & National School Picture Day
Night Sky, 9/10: Sunrise: 6:52 am Sunset 7:48 pm 12 hours and 55 minutes of daylight Moonset: 3:16 pm. ...note the moon does not rise again until 12:17 am tomorrow
Once I took a DNA test. It was pretty hard but I think I passed. °° The geneticist used to send out cards to couples who found out they were pregnant. The card said: Congratulations on successfully combining your DNA.
..........Life took me on a different twist.........Dolly Parton …..Gettin' Happy
2) Food banks receive donations from farmers, grocery stores, wholesalers, manufacturers, and individual supporters. Partnerships that help prevent food waste while feeding those in need. A major resource is food rescue; the process of capturing safe, high-quality food that might otherwise be discarded due to labeling errors, short shelf life, etc.
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Every time you make a typo the errorists win. --Submitted by LanguageNerds
Moonbeam: Trust your anger. It is a demand for love. --Natalie Diaz Postcolonial Love Poem
Observation of the Week: On the other hand, the examined life doesn't seem to produce much income. --Edward Sorel --Submitted by UUHS
Video of the Week: President Truman on the first transcontinental television airing. (:45)
Don't leave inferences to be drawn when evidence can be presented. --Richard Wright
To study for your DNA test, try highlighting with a genetic marker. °° DNA without Helix is just a flat joke.
..........Bittersweet memories.........Dolly Parton …..I Will Always Love You
3) Modern food banks have large climate-controlled warehouses where food is sorted and stored until it is needed. Sorting is a labor intensive task and local volunteers often help with that. Distribution is to local churches, shelters, neighborhood pantries, and nonprofits. Food banks provide the infrastructure, while community partners bring compassion and knowledge of the region.
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My 8-year-old asked if I've ever experienced hallucinations, which is an odd question considering I don't have any 8-year-olds. --Steve Acree --Submitted by jm or ks
Weird Word of the Week: Deipnosophist – a person skilled in table talk. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/deipnosophist
Dragon of the Week: Boris aka My Father's Dragon
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Strip paint off metal patio furniture. Cover the painted surface for one week with a bath towel saturated with Coca-Cola. Add more Coke daily to keep the towel drenched. The paint strips off effortlessly. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola3.html
A Home DNA test kit does not make a good baby shower gift. °° My DNA test results confirm it...I'm probably human.
...........I'm beggin' of you, please don't take my man.........Dolly Parton …..Jolene
4) One network, Feeding America, consists of between 200-250 member food banks. There are also dozens of independent and regional food related banks.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Contrary to popular belief, pigs don't actually speak pig Latin. They speak Porkuguese. --Submitted by cn of
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Dragon Con 2026 (3-5, Atlanta, GA) Dragon Con is the largest multi-media, popular culture convention focusing on science fiction & fantasy... https://www.dragoncon.org/
Whatever This Is of the Week: Lego Kit: Kansas University Campanile bell tower. Details
Spark of Joy of the Week: To the people who lose one shoe on the side of the highway, please tell me what the rest of your life is like. https://www.facebook.com/theherdhub
New DNA tests have revealed that Orville and Wilbur's parents were actually Chinese. So I guess that means two Wongs do make a Wright. °° I made a DNA joke in my biology class but no one laughed...guess my thymine was off.
..........I woke up this mornin' with a smile on my face.........Dolly Parton …..Last Night's Lovin'
5) Roughly 49 to 53 million people in the US rely on food pantries and food banks.
Protest Sign of the Week: LOVE LIKE DOLLY
Quote of the Week: The real problem of humanity is the following: we have paleolithic emotions, medieval institutions, and god-like technology. --Edward O Wilson
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Major in philosophy: Ask people WHY they would like fries with that burger. https://www.facebook.com/authormontgomery
Today's Peace of History: September 4, 1978: Simultaneous demonstrations in Moscow’s Red Square and in front of the White House in Washington, D.C. were organized by the War Resisters League, calling for nuclear disarmament.
After 10 years, a mother realizes her child doesn't look like anyone in the family and gets a DNA test done. Surprise, it's not her child! She tells the husband, who calmly replies, "What, you don't remember?" The wife shakes her head worriedly, hoping her husband's answer will fill in the gap. He says to her: "When we were leaving the hospital, the baby pooped in the diaper. You told me to change it, so I went back inside, grabbed a clean baby, and left the dirty one there." °° DNA thinks it's funny to ask RNA “Are you still single” every time she sees him.
..........I might be crazy, but I ain't dumb.........Dolly Parton & Porter Wagoner …..Run That By Me One More Time
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, September 4, 2026: Twined ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.
Moonbeam: Golf is a game of ego, but it is also a game of integrity: the most important thing is you do what is right when no one is looking. --Tom Watson
Cost of War:
Pentagon Spending 9/3/26: $942,699, 874,972
~~That 19 billion, one hundred and twenty-seven million, six hundred and nineteen thousand, four hundred and thirty-five dollars this week. (8/28-9/3) AND five billion, eight hundred and thirty-three million, one hundred and seventy thousand, five hundred dollar in 3 days.
Pentagon Spending 9/1/26: $936,866,704,472
Pentagon Spending 8/27/26: $923,572,255,537
Peace is the virtue of civilization. War is its crime. --Victor Hugo
Pentagon Spending in August 2026: $89,089,647,361
Pentagon Spending in July 2026: $85,053,017,282
Pentagon Spending in June 2026: $82,621,957,422
Pentagon Spending in May 2026: $87,601,145,719
Pentagon Spending in April 2026: $81,264,897,194
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
Men can starve from a lack of self-realization as much as they can from a lack of bread. --Richard Wright
Famous Last Words: ...And know you know the rest of the story. --Paul Harvey
..........Don't talk to me in circles in some mumbo-jumbo jive.........Dolly Parton …..Straight Talk
I just took a home DNA test. Turns out I'm 100% going to jail for shoplifting. °° If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA Helicase so I could unzip your genes.
May Peace inhabit your soul
And Joy haunt your spirit
prairie mama
christine
Last Laugh:
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