Famous First Words: Yes, your honor... Johnny Cochran's first words in the trial of OJ Simpson
Rise and Shine! Today is the day to Unsubscribe to the Shit Show!
Today is National Custodial Workers Day! Kids can shoot a basket from 50 feet down court but can't hit a trash can two inches away. --T McCracken ** Karen: Go out and water the garden. Maid: Ma'am, it's raining. Karen: So take an umbrella.
..........Where all the monkeys throw nuts.........Groucho Marx …..Hooray For Captain Spaulding
If we are to teach real peace in this world, and if we are to carry on a real war against war, we shall have to begin with the children. --Mahatma Gandhi
It is a chilly (55°) Friday morning. {...been a long time since I could say that.} The sky is clear of clouds and wind while the trees are still. They are hiding birds that sing anthems to the morning. Everything is green, much greener than most Octobers. Dampness from rain and dew fills the air; it shines a little as the light grows. An aroma of damp soil and cement wafts up from below the feet and tickles the nose. A squirrel who seems to believe it is hidden behind a thick willow branch stares in disappointment that I am out of sunflower seeds and have only peanuts to offer from breakfast. Puck has not yet gotten out of bed or rather out from under the bed this morning, but he coughs now and then to let me know he is okay. Veronica came by, demanded a treat, and disappeared again. My, what a pleasant morning. I hope the whole day goes like this.
Hope your weekend cleans up on fun, ePistliers
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Misery might love company, but so does Joy. And Joy throws much better parties. --Billy Ivey https://www.facebook.com/SFTSorg
They're called mermaids because they sweep the bottom of the ocean. ** I love cleaning up messes I didn't make so much, I became a janitor.
..........Now do you believe in rock and roll.........Don McLean …..American Pie
Trivia Questions: It's World Smile Day!
How many muscles does it take to smile?
How many muscles does it take to frown?
At what age do we begin to smile?
Who smiles more, men or women?
Are smiles really more beautifying than makeup?
Big Hello: Selam – Zazaki (Northern Iran) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened. --Mark Twain
Image of the Week: Senator Roger Marshall of Kansas lives in Florida. In Kansas he's as hard to find as bigfoot. This is a rare sighting at the Indivisible Protest in Lawrence, KS.
Insult of the Week: Thy tongue is steeped in falsehood. --Shakespeare
Don't mess with janitors. They know places where no one will ever find you. ** You've never met a maid who owned an HP or a Dell, right? They all own Imacs. It's because they don't do windows.
..........Starry, starry night.........Don McLean …..Vincent
Moonbeam: There is always one moment in childhood when the door opens and lets the future in. --Graham Greene
Blasphemy of the Week: I'm Catholic in that I'm addicted to cats. --Submitted by Blasphemy Memes
Not Blasphemy of the Week: The future cannot afford loyalty without understanding. --Pope Leo XIV
Coffee Joke of the Week: I'm great at multitasking. I can listen, think about coffee, and forget why I was listening...all at the same time. https://www.facebook.com/search/top?q=funny%20coffee%20quotes
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: There are 492 billionaires on this planet and not one of those losers has decided to become batman. --Submitted by INRITH
Lots of people wanted George Jetson's flying car. Not me, I wanted Rosie. the robot maid, to clean for me. ** I may be a janitor but I cannot clean up after stupid.
..........Whose shadow bears the secret promise..........Sting …..Desert Rose
1) Smiles can require your body to use up to 53 muscles, but you can smile using only 5.
Almanac: It is Friday, October 2, the 275th day of 2026. The moon enters its last quarter tomorrow and is in Gemini. Today is Audiophile Day, Guardian Angels Day, International Day of Non-violence, Name Your Car Day, National Custodial Workers Day, National Produce Misting Day, National Smarties Day, Peanuts (Cartoon) Day, Phileas Fogg's Wager Day, Shemini Atzeret (Sundown), and World Farm Animals Day. Because it is the first Friday in October it is Kids Music Day, Lee's National Denim Day, Manufacturing Day, National Body Language Day, National Diversity Day, National Manufacturing Day (MFG Day), World College Radio Day, World Plaid Day, and World Smile Day. Finally because it is the first full weekend it is also National Storytelling Weekend (2-4).
Among those born on this day were Richard III (1452), Isabella of Aragon (1470), Nat Turner (1800), Paul von Hinderburg (1847), William Ramsay (1852), Mahatma Gandhi (1869), Groucho Marx (1890), Bud Abbott (1897), Graham Greene (1904), Jack Finney (1911), Spanky McFarland (1928), Johnnie Cochran (1936), Dorothy Pitman Hughes (1938), Vernor Vinge (1944), Don McLean (1945), Annie Leibovitz (1949), Sting (1951), and Warren Spector (1955).
On October second Cartier discovered Montreal (Mount Royal, 1535), the first modern reflecting telescope was completed (1608), the NY Anti-slavery Society was organized (1833), the first Pan American conference opened (DC, 1889), President Wilson suffered a stroke (1919), the first alcohol power plant was established in Atchison , KS (1936) ~~Because this was the best thing Kansans could think up to do with alcohol~~ the first self-sustaining nuclear chain reaction was demonstrated (Chicago, 1942), "Peanuts" first appeared in newspapers (1950), Twilight Zone began airing (1959), Thurgood Marshall was sworn in as the first black Supreme Court Justice (1967), the plane carrying the Wichita State University football team crashed (1970), and three cosmonauts returned after a record 237 days in orbit (1984).
Night Sky, 10/2: The Orionid meteor shower becomes active today and peaks 9/21-22.
Fraternal Picture of the Week: The Sound and the Noodles
This Week: Saturday, October 3 – Frugal Fun Day & National Play Outside Day & World Porridge Day
Sunday, October 4 – Blessing of the Animals & Dick Tracy Day & Kids Music Day & Ten-Four Day
Night Sky, 10/4: Saturn at Opposition — Saturn is at its closest point to Earth and fully illuminated by the Sun, making it appear at its biggest and brightest. It is visible all night
Monday, October 5 – Get Funky Day & The Victims of Marijuana Prohibition Day & World Teachers Day
Night Sky, 10/5: Mars can be seen very near the moon.
Tuesday, October 6 – American Libraries Day & National Badger Day & National Coaches Day
Night Sky, 10/6: Predawn planets: Jupiter, Uranus, & Neptune in the east. Mars rises after midnight. Saturn rises just after sunset.
Wednesday, October 7 – National Inner Beauty Day & National Pumpkin Seed Day & World Cotton Day
Thursday, October 8 – Harry Potter Book Day & National Salmon Day & World Sight Day
Night Sky, 10/7: Sunrise: 7:22 am Sunset: 6:42 pm 11 hours and 11 minutes of daylight. Moonrise: 51:32 pm Moonset 10:31 pm
Night Sky, 10/8: Draconid meteor shower. Beginning in the evening and running until early morning. 5-10 meteors per hour with good, dark skies.
Imperial Widgets fired their janitor. He got the floors so shiny it began to reflect bad decisions. ** I was doing dishes when my roommate came into the kitchen and asked why I was crying. I told her “I was just remembering how I was doing dishes with my mom when I was 10. I told her when I grew up I'd have a maid to do this.”
..........Temptation, frustration..........Sting …..Don't Stand So Close To Me
2) While the myth claims it takes 43-50 muscles to frown, it really takes 6-11.
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: There is a rumor about that the entire press corp both red and blue are begging 45 to ban them from covering JD Vance. @thedailyshow.com
Moonbeam: But if the technological Singularity can happen, it will. --Vernor Vinge ~~The technological singularity is a hypothetical point when artificial intelligence accelerates and self-improves so rapidly that it surpasses human control and comprehension. ~~~~This definition was supplied by google AI. ~~~~~~If it's any comfort, AI DID NOT follow it with Mwaa ha ha.
Fun Fact of the Week: The sun and wind that power solar panels and turbines never have to pass through the Strait of Hormuz. --Submitted by 98%
Video of the Week: Abbott & Costello: Who's On First (5:31)
There is no “way to peace”, There is only peace. --Mahatma Gandhi
If Cinderella had been a dairy maid would she have been called Mozzarella. ** Just because it is my job to clean up does not mean it's your job to make messes.
..........My love is a flame that burns in your name..........Sting …..We'll Be Together
3) Babies seem to be born knowing how to smile. Even blind babies smile. While handshakes, hugs, and bows are culturally defined, smiles are universal signs of happiness and acceptance. Most doctors believe that real smiles occur when babies are awake at the age of 4-6 months.
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The estate of Adolf Hitler sued Donald J Trump Thursday for what it called the “blatant theft” of the late German chancellor's design for an arch of triumph in Berlin. --Andy Borowitz
Weird Word of the Week: Dickademic: (adj) When someone uses big words and a serious tone to disguise the fact that they're still wrong. https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=1325307769030198
Dragon of the Week: Jörmungandr – the Midgard Serpent
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Shield healthy plants from organic weed killers. Cut off the bottom of a clean, used 2-liter Coca-Cola bottle, and cover the weeds with the top half of the bottle. Insert the nozzle of a spray bottle filled with organic herbicide into the neck of the bottle and spray. ~~Better yet, pull the damned weeds up and never use herbicides.
I am a janitor but my official title is Angel. ** When I get home at night, I'm way beyond tired. I'm actually sweepy.
...........I'll be watching you..........Sting …..Every Breath You Take
4) Generally women smile more than men. However when they are in similar work or social roles, they tend to smile about the same number of times. Boy babies, though, do smile less than girl babies. Girl babies also make more eye contact.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: So embarrassing when you stare into the abyss and the abyss stares back at you, so you wave, but the abyss was staring at someone behind you. --Submitted by Philosophy Matters
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Archcon 2026 (2-4, St Louis, MO) ...special guest Larry Niven!!!! https://archonstl.org/
Whatever This Is of the Week: The squirrels who come and eat sunflower seeds and peanuts on my patio, have begun to sneak the peanuts away – one at a time. I believe he/she/they are hiding them for winter. I've only ever seen one at a time, come to shed roof and look around, then skinny down and pick up a single nut, and skinny back up stopping mid climb to look around again. Finally disappearing into the trees with the nut uneaten. There are a few nut shells on the roof, so someone is snacking.
Spark of Joy of the Week: Autumn – a poem by Ursula K Le Guin
gold of amber
red of ember
brown of umber
all September
I recently got an Eastern European maid to help clean around the house. I showed her where everything was: trash bin, broom, dust mop, vacuum. She said she’d start right away. When I came back from work, she was still vacuuming, 8 hours later. Well, she is a Slovac. ** Janitor! I'm paid to clean up your crap, not take it.
..........So I'll wait for the wild rose that's waitin' for me.........Don McLean …..Mountains Of Mourne
5) A research study conducted by Orbit Complete discovered that 69% of people find women more attractive when they smile than when they are wearing makeup. The better we feel about ourselves, the happier we are.
Protest Sign of the Week: MaLICE CowardICE DisservICE PrejudICE InjustICE
Better Protest Sign of the Week: RESIST with JOY! Goodness Exists. Look For It!
Quote of the Week: Above all, always be capable of feeling deeply any injustice committed against anyone, anywhere in the world. This is the most beautiful quality in a revolutionary. --Che Guevara
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm just one sensory overload away from jail. --Submitted by FTLOD
Today's Peace of History: October 2, 1967: Thurgood Marshall was sworn in as an associate justice of the United States Supreme Court, the first African American on the nation's highest court. He was appointed to the Court by President Lyndon Johnson who previously had appointed him Solicitor General, the legal officer in the Justice Department responsible for representing the United States before the Supreme and federal appellate courts. Marshall had been the lead attorney in the Brown v. Board of Education case which led to the end of legal segregation in the nation’s schools.
I'm guessing janitors hate the first day of school as much as the students. ** My maid doesn't drink at all. She's a dry cleaner.
..........Love the way you smile at me.........Don McLean …..Birthday Song
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, October 2, 2026: The Clean ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.
Moonbeam: Without economic empowerment, you're not free, and Black folks have not gained that freedom we fought for. --Dorothy Pitman Hughes
Cost of War: Pentagon Spending 10/1/26: $1,020,702,251,165 This week it comes to nineteen billion, four hundred and seventeen million, eight hundred and fifteen thousand, eight hundred and twenty-seven dollars to blow things up.
Pentagon Spending 9/24/26: $1,001,284,435,338
Peace is the most powerful weapon of mankind. --Mahatma Gandhi
Pentagon Spending in September 2026: $83,835,546,693
Pentagon Spending in August 2026: $89,089,647,361
Pentagon Spending in July 2026: $85,053,017,282
Pentagon Spending in June 2026: $82,621,957,422
Pentagon Spending in May 2026: $87,601,145,719
Pentagon Spending in April 2026: $81,264,897,194
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
True humility means most the strenuous and constant endeavor, entirely directed towards the service of humanity. --Mahatma Gandhi
Famous Last Words: ...and you bet your life. --Groucho Marx
..........On her back is the battle of Waterloo..........Groucho Marx …..Lydia The Tattooed Lady
All maids love their brooms. That is a sweeping generalization. ** I'm not just a janitor, I'm a dirt ninja.
May Peace clear your spirit
And Joy polish you mind
prairie mama
christine
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