ePistle bUrgoo

 Famous First Words: The Congress finds that... Americans With Disabilities Act

July is Picnic Month...Actually, it's also National Baked Beans Month, National Hot Dog Month, National Ice Cream Month, National Deli Salad Month, and National Watermelon Month...so Picnic and its various components Month. My friend Nicolas entered a contest to have lunch in the park with the Rolling Stones. I hope they pick Nick.

..........I don't want you to wash my clothes.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..I Just Want To Make Love To You

Peace is the breath of our spirit. --Universal Peace Covenant

It is a beautiful (74°) Friday morning. There are no clouds in the sky although the blue is very pale as if a very thin layer of white covers it. A 2 mph wind hardly moves the leaves on the trees, much less their limbs. Backyard sunflowers are bright and cheerful and everywhere there are the deep greens of summer. Birds flit through the greenery now and then. Sometimes their voices are heard while they flit, some are silent; the robins rarely converse. Currently there is a high pitched tweet but the maker is unseen. Puck is sleeping and lightly snoring on his pillow. Veronica the cat has not made an appearance yet this morning. I am munching a blueberry muffin and drinking sweet and creamy decaf. Jeff has a new electric mop and so the house begins to smell like soap and steam and the air is filled with swishing sounds. It's a pretty fine morning all the way around.

Hope your weekend is a walk in the park – with food, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I want my coffee so strong it would get somebody stripped of their Olympic medal. --Jonathan Edward Durham --Submitted by INRITH

Picnics are for lovers and ants. For a festive change of pace, Anna Anteater's family used to go to the park and lay out a nice checkered tablecloth on the ground and fill it with cake and pie. Then they would play I Spy until their picnic showed up.

..........You'll come running back to me.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..Time Is On Our Side

Trivia Questions: One Voice Day was created to read the Universal Peace Covenant.

• ^ The Universal Peace Covenant was created by the School of Metaphysics. What do you know about this KCK organization?
• ^^ What religious teaching informs the School of Metaphysics?
• ^^^ Have you read the Universal Peace Covenant?
• ^^^^ One Voice Day asks that we all give public readings of the covenant on what day of the year?

Big Hello of the Week: Fakaalofa atu – Niuean (New Zealand, Cook Islands, Tonga) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Remember when we used to laugh at those commercials “I've fallen and I can't get up”? Well, it's not funny anymore. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Image of the Week: 2024 Olympic Mascot Phrygian – shaped after the small Phrygian hats. The hat mascot suggests an allegorical figure of the French republic and therefore freedom.

People Wearing Phrygian Hats of the Week: people wearing phrygian hats - Google Search

Literary Joke of the Week: I asked a literary agent what kind of writing paid the most. She said, “ransom notes”. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

The taxidermist was at the hot dog stand stuffing his face. / A strange sect makes hot dogs from flying mammals...so from bat to wurst.

..........Too lazy to crow for day.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..Little Red Rooster

Moonbeam: After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. --Aldous Huxley

Blasphemy of the Week: Jesus isn't American.

Puzzle of the Week: From Sandy Weisz, of Chicago: Think of a famous actor and a famous actress who co-starred in a classic movie of the past. The actress's first name, when reversed, and the actor’s last name, spelled forward, are similar romantic gifts. Who are these film stars? NPR Sunday Puzzle 7/21/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Voting Prevents Unwanted Presidencies.

When it comes to picnics, spilling the beans usually precedes dishing the dirt. Baked beans are rarely brought to picnic these days. They have become tomato covered student food. Has beans.

..........I have to turn my head until my darkness goes.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..Paint It Black

Almanac: It is Friday, July 26, 2024. The moon will enter the last quarter on Sunday (7/28) and is in Aries. It is All or Nothing Day, One Voice Day, Lumberjack Day, National Talk in an Elevator Day, and System Administrator Appreciation Day.

Among those born on this day were George Bernard Shaw (1856), Carl Jung (1875), Pearl S. Buck (1892), Aldous Huxley (1894), Gracie Allen (1902), Blake Edwards (1922), Jason Robards Jr. (1922), Mick Jagger (1943), Helen Mirren (1946) and Dorothy Hamill (1956).

On July twenty-sixth Ben Franklin became the first Postmaster General (1775), New York ratified the US constitution (1788), the FBI was established (1908), the CIA was established (1947), the first black tv host aired (CBS, Bob Howard, 1948), Egypt seized the Suez Canal (1956), and Apollo 15 was launched (1971).

Night Sky, 7/26: Week by week, Venus is edging up in the west through the afterglow of sunset. Fading Mercury soon drops down. And can you make out fainter, twinkly Regulus near Mercury? http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Family Picnic

This Week: Saturday, July 27 – Love Is Kind Day & National Day of the Cowboy & Walk On Stilts Day

Sunday, July 28 – Buffalo Soldiers Day & National Parents Day & National Waterpark Day

Night Sky, 7/28: The Piscis Austrinus meteor shower will be active from 15 July to 10 August, producing its peak rate of meteors around 28 July. Piscis Austrinid meteor shower 2024 - In-The-Sky.org

Monday, July 29 – International Butler Day & International Tiger Day & National Lipstick Day & Rain Day

Tuesday, July 30 – Cheesecake Day & Friendship Day & National Share A Hug Day & Paperback Book Day

Wednesday, July 31 – National Avocado Day & National Mutt Day & National Orgasm Day

Night Sky, 7/31: The tail of Scorpius is at its best low due south right after night is fully dark. Find it lower right of the Teapot's spout by a fist at arm's length or less. Or about a fist and a half lower left of Antares. How low it will appear depends on how far north or south you live: the farther south, the higher.

Thursday, August 1 - Girlfriends Day & Lammas & National Mah Jongg Day & Rounds Resounding Day

It's true that the ice princess grew up to be the Dairy Queen. Soda jerks learn their trade at Sundae School. These jokes are from Cone Appétit magazine.

..........While the sun is bright.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..Ruby Tuesday

^ The School of Metaphysics was brought into the world in 1973 as a place where all people of all backgrounds could come to study, learn, teach, research the ways to live in harmony with the Universal Laws that govern creation. It is a 501(c)(3) educational institute of higher learning. It is headquartered in Kansas City, KS. School of Metaphysics (som.org)

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The difference between JD Vance and his book is the book has a spine. --Adam Miller --Submitted by gr of oh

Moonbeam: Technological progress has merely provided us with more efficient means for going backwards. --Aldous Huxley

Conspiracy Theories of the Week: Almost immediately after the assassination attempt on Trump at a Butler, Pennsylvania, rally Saturday evening, a conspiracy theory emerged that the assassination attempt had been “staged” – that Trump and his campaign had set it up to orchestrate the iconic photos of a resolute Trump surviving an attempt on his life. The term “staged” began trending. AND Some suggested, without evidence, that the shooting had occurred because of deliberate negligence on the part of the Secret Service. Others, including elected Republican lawmakers, falsely tried to suggest President Joe Biden or his administration had some role in the attempted assassination. Conspiracy theories spread wildly after the first assassination attempt on a US president in the social media age | CNN Business

Joke Related to Conspiracy Theories of the Week: The reason I'm convinced that he didn't lose a piece of his ear is that he would have put it up for auction by now. --Submitted by 98%

Video of the Week: In Honor of Lumberjack Day – Monty Python: The Lumberjack Song (2:41) The Lumberjack Song (youtube.com)

Peace is our birthright. --Universal Peace Covenant

A picnic is a great way to see what all the foods you love would taste like if you add ants. --Maxine. I love everything about family picnics. Except the heat, the food, the flies, and the family. --Maxine

..........Hey, think the time is right for a palace revolution.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..Street Fighting Man

^^ The Bahá'i Faith's Universal Life Principles were a basis for the Universal Peace Covenant. Among these principles are the independent search after truth and the oneness of the human race. Universal Peace | What Bahá’ís Believe (bahai.org)

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: We all deserve oscars for our stunning performances as high functioning humans in a crumbling society.

Weird Word of the Week: Percontation: A question designed to elicit confirmation or denial as opposed to a question designed to obtain information Percontation (worldwidewords.org)

Dragon of the Week: Street Lamp in Copenhagen

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Clean dirt, grease, and grime from walls, glass, porcelain, wooden furniture, and the outsides of appliances. Dissolve one-quarter cup Cascade in one gallon of very hot water. Scrub, then wipe clean with a dry cloth. Cascade is spot-resistant and contains water-softening agents, so everything gets shiny clean without rinsing. Cascade®: Wacky Uses

Watermelons write all the good tell-all books because they have all the juice. If life gives you melons, check with your optometrist, you may have dyslexia. You should never trust watermelons; they've always been a little seedy.

...........Well, you know I could never be alone.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..Dead Flowers

^^^ It's not very long and it's right here: The UNIVERSAL PEACE COVENANT (som.org)

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: After watching a whole lot of TV thrillers...I've come to the conclusion that serial killers only murder women with matching bras and panties. This makes me feel very safe. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: GalaxyCon 2024 (25-28, Raleigh, NC) Join fans from across the galaxy... GalaxyCon Raleigh

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 9^th International STEAM Education Conference (iSTEM-Ed) 2024, (7/31-8/2, Cha-am, Hua Hin, Thailand) Teaching with the Technology Resource Center 9th International STEM Education Conference 2024 | IEEE Education Society (ieee-edusociety.org)

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Meg Ryan (Gem) and Billy Crystal (Crystal, When Harry Met Sally)

My love for pie is irrational. My philosophy in life is always leave room for pie. These fast food places would make a lot more money if they sold breakfast pies instead of breakfast burritos.

..........When I'm ridin' round the world.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..Satisfaction

^^^^ Originally the Universal Peace Covenant was to be read every year on December 31^st. The date was later changed to July 26^th, One Voice Day.

Fun Facts of the Week: Iceland is the only country in the world with no mosquitoes.

Quote of the Week: True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country. --Kurt Vonnegut

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My mind works so fast. When I think of something I say it. Lots of times I say it even before I think of it. --Gracie Allen

Today's Peace of History, July 26, 1990: The Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) was signed into law by President George H.W. Bush.

S'more puns, I can't resist. I'll tell you where Puffy is. They smooshed his face between two crackers and doused him with chocolate. It was s'morbid. Little known fact: King Arthur took that sword out of the stone so he could toast marshmallows for s'mores.

..........Se a cabo..........Santana …..Se A Cabo

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, July 16, 2024, ePistle bUrgoo**. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS. **Burgoo is a thick soup or the outdoor meal where it is served.

Moonbeam: An intellectual is a person who's found one thing that's more interesting than sex. --Aldous Huxley

Cost of War:

• As of 07/25/24 State Department Costs: $241,721,963,445.
• As of 07/18/24 State Department Costs: $241,167,455,132.
• As of 07/25/24 Homeland Security: $1,174,267,015,918.,
• As of 07/18/24 Homeland Security: $1,173,664,695,216.
• As of 07/25/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,234,258,109,362.
• As of 07/18/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,232,709,317,418.
• As of 07/25/24 Military Costs: $3,096,807,130,702.
• As of 07/18/24 Military Costs: $3,095,631,242,609.
• As of 07/25/24 Veterans Care: $3,781,25,021,826.
• As of 07/18/24 Veterans Care: $3,769,513,972,329.
• As of 07/25/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,528,309,356,738.
• As of 07/18/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,512,687,051,250.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Our world is in the midst of change. --Universal Peace Covenant

Famous Last Words: “Good night, Gracie” --Gracie Allen (Burns and Allen Show)

..........The sands have run out.........Rolling Stones with Mick Jagger …..Lady Jane

Ever been to one of those church picnics where everybody brings enough for their family and another family. In fact, as a benediction** our pastor used to say, “Go in peace and take something with you.” Elon Musk is so stingy he held the company picnic at a soup kitchen. **My grammar AI wanted me to change it to blessing. It gave no explanation. FYI: AI doesn't understand puns at all and is down right snotty about whether you can use definite articles or whether you can leave them out.

May Peace be your entree
And Joy be your dessert
prairie mama
christine

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