Cooooooooool ePistle

 

Famous First Words: How can you muster a unit in a place like this? --Recruiter Mother Courage And Her Children by Bertolt Brecht

April is Jazz Appreciation Month. If the film ratings system had been in place, The Jazz Singer would have been rated R because of all the sax. I was feeling really blue; the doctor said I had Mild Davis.

..........And whatever you've got to do.........Ella Fitzgerald …..A Lovely Day Today

The Gospel takes away our right forever, to discriminate between the deserving and the undeserving poor. --Dorothy Day

It is a bright Friday morning. The azure sky is partially covered in fluffy white humidity. There is little breeze to move the willow switches or the now leaf lined mulberry branches. Robins and sparrows have visited and departed leaving the backyard quiet and still. 41°F is normal and neither hot nor cold for an April sunrise although it feels a little bit chilly. A small insect flies by my window and disappears going north. I sip doctored decaf and listen to Puck snoring on his pillow. Fragrance from the few flowers left in the thinning, two week old bouquet still wafts its way through the air to make the morning pleasanter. Ah, and now the crows are here to sing their raucous melodies and scatter the clouds to let a burst of sunshine light up the willow and the mulberry and the world itself.

Hope your weekend is smokin', ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese. --G K Chesterton

Great wine is like great jazz; it confuses me and I'm pretty sure it's all the same. There is so much traditional jazz in New Orleans that Louisiana has become a swing state.

..........When I wander through this wonderland alone.........Sarah Vaughn …..Misty

Trivia Questions: Happy DNA Day!

• ^ People are always talking about genes; what percentage of your DNA is made up of genes?
• ^^ What percentage of DNA is the same in all humans?
• ^^^ If you “unrolled” all your DNA how long a chain would that be?
• ^^^^ What other factors influence personal traits besides DNA?
• ^^^^^ Does your DNA change or age?

Big Hello: Gwe' – Míkmaq (Canada & USA) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The older we get, the more we can't believe how old we are.

Image of the Week: A gift from rhb of ks I really love them both. I pick them up and hold them for a while a couple of times a day.

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: Due to budget cuts 42% of libraries are now renting prime napping spots on Airbnb. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

A jazz musician is someone who puts a $5,000 horn in a $500 car and drives 50 miles for a $5 gig. A rocker plays 3 chords in front of 3,000 people. A jazz cat plays 3.000 chords in front of 3 people.

..........If you can keep me, I wants to stay here..........Nina Simone …..I Loves You Porgy

Moonbeam: Dad taught me everything I know. Unfortunately, he didn't teach me everything he knows. --Al Unser Jr

Blasphemy of the Week: Jesus was a liberator of the oppressed, not a mascot for the powerful. --Submitted by sw of ks

Puzzle of the Week: Think of a nine-letter word naming a kind of tool that is mentioned in the Bible. Remove the second and sixth letters and the remaining letters can be rearranged to spell two new words that are included in a well known biblical passage and are related to the area in which the tool is used. What are the three words? NPR Sunday Puzzle 4/14/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's good to know who hates you, and it's good to be hated by the right people. --Johnny Cash

Kenny G has made a new album featuring adaptations of Thelonious Monk compositions. It includes some truly unforgettable tracks such as “Round Noon” and “Straight No Changes”. How many jazz trumpeters does it take to change a light bulb? None, the piano player can screw it in with her left hand.

..........Help me solve the mystery of it.........Dinah Washington …..Teach Me Tonight

^ Genes are short segments of DNA, but not all DNA is made up of genes. All told, genes are only about 1-3% of your DNA. The rest of your DNA code controls the activity of your genes. Your genes influence how you look, how you act, and even how susceptible you are to disease.

Almanac: It is Friday, April 19, 2024. The moon will be full (Pink) next Tuesday (4/23) and is in Virgo. It is National Garlic Day, Day of Silence, National Hanging Out Day, Yom HaShoah (Holocaust Remembrance Day), DNA Day, and National Day of No Silence. In Oklahoma City it is Bombing Commemoration Day.

Among those born on this day were Roger Sherman (1721), Thomas McKean (1721), Eliot Ness (1903), Glenn T Seaborg (1912), Dick Sargent (1933), Dudley Moore (1935), Tim Curry (1946), Al Unser, Jr (1962) and Ashley Judd (1968).

On April nineteenth The Netherlands recognized the United States (1782), the California Historical Society formed (1852), Connecticut finally approved the Bill of Rights (1939), Mother Courage and Her Children premiered (1941), Carousel opened (1945), ABC-TV began broadcasting (1948), Chiang Kai-shek was elected president of Taiwan (1948), Grace Kelly married Prince Rainier III (1956), Surveyor III landed on the moon (1967), and Sierra Leone became a republic (1971).

Night Sky, 4/19: Bright Arcturus climbs high in the east these evenings. Equally bright Capella descends high in the northwest. They stand at exactly the same height above your horizon at some moment between about 9 and 10 pm daylight-saving time, depending mostly on how far east or west you live in your time zone. How accurately can you time this event for your location? Like everything constellation-related, it happens 4 minutes earlier each night.
http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Playdoh Playday

This Week: Saturday, April 20 – 4/20 Day & Auctioneers Day & World Circus Day

Sunday, April 21 -Bulldogs Are Beautiful Day & International Hemp Day & National Yellow Bat Day

Monday, April 22 – Earth Day & National Baseball Day & Beagle Day

Night Sky, 4/22: The Lyrids will peak tonight, displaying a maximum of about 18 meteors per hour in a clear sky.

Tuesday, April 23 – English Language Day & Movie Theatre Day & Talk Like Shakespeare Day & World Book Night

Wednesday, April 24 – Secretary's Day & National Library Outreach Day & Walk At Lunch Day

Night Sky, 4/24: As night descends, look high in the west for Pollux and Castor lined up almost horizontally (depending on your latitude). These two stars, the heads of the Gemini twins, form the top of the enormous Arch of Spring. To their lower left is Procyon, the left end of the Arch. Farther to their lower right is the other end, formed by Menkalinan (Beta Aurigae) and then brilliant Capella. The whole thing sinks in the west through the evening.

Thursday, April 25 – Celebrate Teen Literature Day & Hug A Plumber Day & Red Hat Society Day

What's the difference between a jazz trumpet solo and a jet plane? About 3 decibels. I feel sad for people like John Coltrane and Charlie Parker who never got to hear third wave ska and find out what those instruments were really capable of.

..........Let's close our eyes and make our own paradise.........Betty Carter …..Let's Fall in Love

^^ We're all 99.5 percent alike. Of the 3 billion base pairs in the human genome, only about 0.5% tend to vary between individuals. While that 0.5% is still what makes us unique, it means we're all more similar than we are different. Studying where those 0.5% are located in the human genome is easier for researchers than to look at all 3 billion base pairs.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm so broke even my reality check bounced. --Submitted by ff of ks

Moonbeam: I find there is something very intimate about being the voice in someone's ear when they're driving. --Tim Curry

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: About one-third of Republicans say they believe Taylor Swift is involved in a covert government effort to help Joe Biden win the 2024 presidential election, a poll from Monmouth University found. The absurd and baseless conspiracy theory in question, which was popularized in right-wing media ahead of Super Bowl LVIII, alleges Swift’s relationship with Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce was fabricated by the government as part of a sprawling psychological operations plot. The goal of the purported plot is that the Chiefs’ victory on Sunday would present Swift with an even larger pulpit from which to endorse Biden, swinging the 2024 presidential election in his favor. While the pop superstar endorsed Biden ahead of the 2020 election and has encouraged her fans to vote in recent years, there is no factual evidence to support the conspiracy theory that has quickly moved from the fringe into the public discourse. --CNN

Video of the Week: Meryl Streep as Mother Courage video clips from mother courage and her children - Google Search (3:15) ~~Warning it is interspersed with commentary, but Streep is incredible.

Don't call me a saint. I don't want to be dismissed so easily. --Dorothy Day

That was Charlie Parker's Ornithology. I threw in a flat nine in bar 16 and a tritone substitution in bar 22. Who noticed that? Hands up if you noticed. English is important but Jazz Band is importanter.

..........When some quarrel we had needs mending.........Carmen McRae …..Round Midnight

^^^ Your DNA could stretch from the earth to the sun and back ~600 times. If unwound and linked together, the strands of DNA in each of your cells would be 6 feet long. With about 30 trillion cells in your body, that means if all your DNA were put end-to-end, it would stretch over 67 billion miles. In comparison, the distance between Earth and the Sun is 93 million miles, and it’s “only" 3 billion miles between Earth and Neptune, the planet at the farthest edge of our solar system.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Politics is the entertainment division of the military industrial complex. --Frank Zappa

Weird Word of the Week: Carwhichet or carriwichet – a non-sequitur question... Is it further to LA or by bus? World Wide Words: Carwhichet

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Remove wine spills or other sports from carpet. Apply Canada Dry Club Soda to the stain, rub it in, wait a few minutes, and sponge it off. Canada Dry®: Wacky Uses

How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb? 5 – one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how Charlie Parker would have done it. How late does the band play? About half a beat behind the drummer.

...........The magic we shared together........Blossom Dearie …..They Say It's Spring

^^^^ Your traits are a product of your genes and your environment. Some of your traits are controlled entirely by your DNA. But most of your traits are controlled by a combination of your genetic information and your environment. For example, your height as an adult is strongly influenced by your DNA. After all, tall biological parents tend to have tall biological children. But, early childhood nutrition also plays a big factor in how tall you become as an adult.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I learned a lot from my mistakes so I decided to make more mistakes to learn more.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Concinnity 24 (20th, Milwaukee School of Engineering) ...As near as I can tell it's a Social Media convention with facebook and tik tok celebrities as guests. Concinnity Home (weebly.com)

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 2024 Tech Expo & Stem Summit (17-19, Orlando, FL) SAEOPP (Education Opportunity Personnel) 2024 National Technology Exposition and STEM Summit - MySAEOPP

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Plowshare → Reap and Sow

Playing jazz trumpet is like marriage; it seems easy until you try it. Pirates and jazz trumpeters have one thing in common – terror on the high “Cs”.

..........you drove me, nearly drove me out of my mind.........Julie London …..Cry Me A River

^^^^^ Your DNA changes over time. For the most part, your DNA is the same now as it was when you were a child, and will be the same when you are much older. But, throughout your life, your DNA acquires random mutations during replication that change your DNA sequence. Most of the time these changes are not noticeable. Additionally, your DNA has special protective caps made of DNA on the ends of the chromosomes, called telomeres. While you age, these telomeres shorten. ~~So while I was getting fat, my DNA was slimming down. Great.

Observation Topic of the Week: When Lord Nelson died he was 5 feet tall. His statue in London is 15 feet tall. That's Horatio of 3:1. --Submitted by Heinlein Society

Quote of the Week: Jazz music is the power of now. There is no script. It's conversation. The emotion is given to you by musicians as they make split-second decisions to fulfill what they feel the moment requires. --Wynton Marsalis

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: As I walk through the valley of shadow and death, I remind myself that...you can't always trust Google maps. --Submitted by High Church Coyote

Today's Peace of History, April 19, 1977: 16 women in the US House of Representatives formed the Congressional Caucus for Women's Issues.

My goldfish are named Dorian, Lydian, Major, Minor, and Diminished. The only way I can tell them apart is by their scales. Opinions are like assholes...everyone's got one. --Art Blakey

..........I loves da man lak a schoolboy loves his pie.........Bessie Smith …..Saint Louis Blues

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, April 19, 2024, cOol ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.arsi

Moonbeam: I changed my mind, I ain't complaining. --Mother Courage --Bertolt Brecht

Cost of War:

• As of 04/18/24 State Department Costs: $233,940,033,337.
• As of 04/11/24 State Department Costs: $233,375,633,177.
• As of 04/18/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,212,522,318,443.
• As of 04/11/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,210,945,818,640.
• As of 04/18/24 Homeland Security: $1,165,814,295,243.
• As of 04/11/24 Homeland Security: $1,165,201,198,338.
• As of 04/18/24 Veterans Care: $3,616,492,344,198.
• As of 04/11/24 Veterans Care: $3,604,541,387,056.
• As of 04/18/24 Military Costs: $3,080,304,253,604.
• As of 04/11/24 Military Costs: $3,079,107,218,499.
• As of 04/18/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,309,075,151,571.
• As of 04/11/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,293,173,046,361.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

We are the nation most powerful, the most armed and we are supplying arms and money to the rest of the world where we are not ourselves fighting. We are eating while there is famine in the world. --Dorothy Day

Famous Last Words: ...without fear or favour, affection or ill-will. (So help me God) --President's Oath Sierra Leone

..........Scent of magnolias, sweet and fresh..........Billie Holiday …..Strange Fruit ~~All of today's songs are famous jazz renditions of famous jazz songs by famous lady jazz singers.

There is nothing to keeping a band together. You simply have to have a gimmick, and the gimmick I use is to pay them money. --Duke Ellington Women and rhythm-section first! --Jaco Pastorius

May Peace play your melody
And Joy keep your tempo
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh: