Friday, May 10, 2019

Rearing ePistle


Famous First Words: Proposing an amendment to the Constitution... Proposed ERA Amendment to the US Constitution
Happy Mother's Day! Hey, mom, how does it feel to have the world's greatest daughter? Gee, I don't know, you'll have to ask your grandma. / It's never easy being a mother. If it were easy, fathers would do it.
..........With the roses so red and the lilies so fair.........Mother Maybelle Carter …..Wildwood Flower
Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved. --Eric Fromm
It is a chilly (41°F) but sunny Friday morning; yet we have not walked. My nephew, Jeffrey is visiting from North Carolina and my brother and wife, Fletcher and Sandra, are here from Arizona and we have had a wonderful week. The sad part came from spreading my sister (Jeff's mother's) ashes on the graves of my grandmother and grandfather and a niece who died as a baby. They are the same graves that received my mother's ashes. It was a very nice, informal service with friends and family followed by going out to eat. We've done that a lot...Ladybird Diner, Cinzetti's, Salty Iguana... Today we are going to Union Station and Crown Center in KC. It has been a wonderful visit. We haven't seen Jeffrey in years and he is joy. But I am hurrying a bit to be ready for KC. Love you all. **It is quiet here this morning. I hear only a low whir of computer and the snuffling of a dog of small nose sleeping. A pleasant place from which to write to you...
Hope yours is the mother of all weekends, ePistliers.
At the park one day I said to my 5 year old, “Look at that kid over there; he's not misbehaving.” My kid replied, He probably has good parents, then.” / The best way to get you child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable. --Lane
..........When I look out my window, many sights to see.........Donovan …..Season of the Witch
Trivia Questions: On this day in 1872 Victoria Woodhull became the first woman presidential candidate.
^ Any idea what Woodhull's first business venture was?
^^ Know anything about Woodhull's association with Cornelius Vanderbilt and Wall Street?
^^^ What newspaper did Woodhull create?
^^^^ What was the legal argument that Woodhull gave for women's suffrage?
^^^^^ Which party nominated Victoria Woodhull for president?
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Stop regretting the past and start doing what you'll regret tomorrow. --Mark Stivers --Submitted by dr of oh
Fake Library Statistic of the Week: Library books are so dirty that 65% of library staff wash their hands before using the restroom. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
True Story: When my little brother was actually little, he asked our mom where she learned to be a mother. Mama got all giddy and said, “At Mother's School”. To which my brother replied, “Didn't the teach you to make your little boy's bed?”
..........Little human upon the sand.........Donovan …..Happiness Runs
Moonbeam: Tell my mother I died for my country...useless...useless --John Wilkes Booth
Something to Think About of the Week: Mushroom – Agaricus Campestris In the products of the unconscious we discover mandala symbols. --Carl Jung

Big Hello: Buaregh – Southern Sámi ( Norway) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Impeachment: It's not just for blowjobs anymore. --Nancy Lee --Submitted by sd of ks
Week of the Week: National Hug Holiday Week (5-11) –If you hug your cat while you're doing crunches, you'll get purrfect abs. / I can tell how uncomfortable a person is just by hugging then for 18 minutes.
Momisms: If you fall out of that tree and break your leg, don't come running to me. / Of course carrots are good for your eyes, have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses? / Would you like a little cheese with that whine.
..........The lock upon my garden gate's a snail, that's what it is.........Donovan …..There Is a Mountain
^ In 1860 Victoria and her younger sister Tennie set up practice as mediums. They worked NYC, Chicago, Cincinnati, “traveling to keep ahead of complaints and legal proceedings”
Almanac: It is Friday, May 10, 2019. The moon will be first quarter tomorrow and is in Leo. It is Clean Up Your Room Day, Fintastic Friday (Giving Sharks A Voice), Lupus Day, Military Spouse Appreciation Day, and Windmill Day. Thailand commemorates the Ploughing Ceremony and US-Indians celebrate Native American Day.
Among those born on this day were John Wilkes Booth (1838), Karl Barth (1886), Olaf Stapleton (1886), Fred Astaire (1899), David O. Selznick (1902), Maybelle Carter (1909), Ella Grasso (1919), Nancy Walker (1921), Fats Domino (1929), Barbara Taylor (1933), and Donovan Leitch (1943).
On May tenth Amerigo Vespucci left on his first voyage to the new world (1497), Ben Franklin tested his first lightning rod (1752), the second Continental Congress convened (1775), the golden spike was driven completing the transcontinental railroad (1869), Victoria Woodhull became the frist woman nominated for US president (1872), Mother's Day was first officially observed (1908), Six Characters in Search of an Author premiered (1921), WHB-AM began broadcasting in KCMO (1922), ~~It stood for World's Happiest Broadcasters at one point in my youth, J. Edgar Hoover was appointed head of the FBI (1924), the first US planetarium opened (Chicago, 1930), Vietnam peace talks began (1968), Francois Mitterrand was elected president of France (1981) and Laverne and Shirley aired its last show (1983).
Night Sky, 5/10: The Moon, nearly first quarter, crosses the Beehive star cluster (M44) this evening for much of North America. In the western sky after dusk the nearly first quarter moon will pass almost directly through the large open star cluster in Cancer known as the Beehive, Praesepe, and Messier 44. The moon will be centered on the cluster at approximately 10 pm EDT. Binoculars or a telescope at low magnification (orange circle) will show both the moon and the cluster at the same time. To better see the clusters' stars, try to position the moon just outside of your optics' field of view. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Max Picture of the Week: Max has decided to be a fireman when he grows up. (He looked happier as a bee)

This Week: Saturday, May 11 – Baby Sitters Day & International Migratory Bird Day & Mother Ocean Day
Night Sky, 5/11: First-quarter Moon (exact at 9:12 p.m. Eastern Daylight Time). The Moon shines some 10° to the right of Regulus. Above Regulus is Algieba (Gamma Leonis), only a little fainter. They're the two brightest stars of the Sickle of Leo.
Sunday, May 12 – Native American Rights Day & Hug Your Cat Day & Odometer Day
Monday, May 13 – Accountant's Day & Frog Jumping Day & Hummus Day
Night Sky, 5/13: Mercury and Uranus are lost in the glare of sunrise. Neptune barely rises before dawn begins. Venus is very low in the brightening dawn.
Tuesday, May 14 – National Decency Day
Night Sky, 5/14: Mars is getting low in the west during and after dusk. Jupiter rises in the southeast around 11 pm. Saturn rises around 1 am.
Wednesday, May 15 – International Day of Families & Peace Officer Memorial Day & Straw Hat Day
Thursday, May 16 – National Piercing Day & Mimosa Day & Biographer's Day
Mom Super Powers: The ability to detect a lie, hear the smallest noises, and see out of the back of her head. / Can hear a sneeze through 3 closed doors while dad snores on.
..........we'll do it in style.........Donovan …..Sunshine Superman
^^ In New York City, Woodhull and her sister Tennie Claflin became spiritual advisers to 76-year-old Cornelius Vanderbilt, whose wife had just died. The sisters served as mediums to help him contact the spirit of his dead wife, and he also used their talents to gain financial insights from the spirit world. Vanderbilt bankrolled Victoria and Tennie's financial ventures on Wall Street, where they began to make money in the stock market. They opened their own brokerage house - Woodhull, Claflin & Company - in 1870 and made a fortune at the New York Stock Exchange.
'Nother Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Child: Mommy, am I adopted? Mommy: No, sweetie, we haven't managed to find someone to take you.
Moonbeam: Joy is the simplest form of gratitude. --Karl Barth
Late Night Snacks of the Week: Yes, when the attorney general lies to Congress, it is a crime. When the president does it, it’s the State of the Union. Anyway, Barr lied to the Senate. And today, he was scheduled to lie to the House of Representatives. But he did not show up. --Stephen Colbert / Rudy Giuliani always looks like the last frame of a clip from America's Funniest Home Videos. --Seth Meyers / “America, I feel like I found a fundamental flaw in your democracy: You have no defense against someone just being a dick.” --Trevor Noah
Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: This week, Norwegian fishermen spotted this beluga whale when they noticed it had this equipment harness on it that was labeled St. Petersburg. Further evidence it was a spy came when they asked for its species and it said whale, beluga whale. They said they tried to get the whale to talk by waterboarding and, man, was that not effective. --Peter Sagal Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me 5/4/19
I was always at peace because of the way my mom treated me. --Martina Hingis
If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands? --Milton Berle / I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them. --Phyllis Diller
..........color sky, rose carmethene, alizarin crimson.........Donovan …..Wear Your Love Like Heaven
^^^ Woodhull used the money they had made from their brokerage to start a newspaper, Woodhull & Claflin's Weekly, which published for the next six years. The newspaper addressed issues that concerned women with unusual frankness, and advanced the editors' vision that women could live as men's equals in the work place, the political arena, and the family circle.
Worthless Facts of the Week: Vespucci's historical importance may rest more in his letters (whether or not he wrote them all) than in his discoveries. From these letters, the European public first learned about the newly discovered continents of the Americas; their existence became generally known throughout Europe within a few years of the letters' publication.
Pre-Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Thank goodness it's raining again...my mud was getting dehydrated. --Submitted by ae of ks
Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Republicans: Corporations should rule over every aspect of society. Democrats: Yes, but they should be more polite about it. --Submitted by ae of mo
Weird & Obsolete Word of the Week: Apricity – the sun's warmth on a cold winter's day https://www.buzzfeed.com/lukelewis/27-delightful-obsolete-words-its-high-time-we-revived
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Polish wood furniture. Spray WD-40 on a cloth and wipe. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/wd40.html
Computers are so smart because they listen to their motherboards. / I have the perfect son. He doesn't smoke. He doesn't drink. He never stays out late. He'll be 6 months next Wednesday.
...........And how just lately this happy song, it came along..........Donovan …..Jennifer Juniper
^^^^ A year after she set up shop on Wall Street, Woodhull addressed the House Judiciary Committee on behalf of women's suffrage. Her Lecture on Constitutional Equality attracted thousands. Woodhull argued that women already had the right to vote - all they had to do was use it - since the 14th and 15th Amendments granted that right to all citizens. (Gender was not specified in either amendment.)
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Is it rude to toss a Xanax in someone's mouth while they're talking? --Submitted by nm of ks
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: VisionCon 2019 (10-12, Branson, MO). Missouri's Premier Pop Culture Con Since it started, Visioncon has had two main goals: offer a fun convention for all ages and to raise money for local charities. More than 25 years later, Visioncon has given tens of thousands to area nonprofits. https://visioncon.net/index.php
Actual Science Convention of the Week: 16th International Conference on Breast Pathology and Cancer Diagnosis. (10-11, Montreal) Theme: Modern Innovation to Breast Cancer Research. https://breastcancer.pathologyconferences.com/
Puck the Brave Episode of the Week: Here's our fearless Puck shadowing in the case of the Looming Löwchen
Sweater, n.: garment worn by a child when its mother is feeling chilly. --Ambrose Bierce / Having kids makes you look stable to the people who thought you were crazy and crazy to the people who thought you were stable. – Kelly Oxford
..........Wind velocity nil..........Donovan …..Mellow Yellow
^^^^^ She was nominated for President of the United States by the newly formed Equal Rights Party on May 10, 1872, and her nomination was ratified at the convention on June 6, 1872. They also nominated the former slave and abolitionist leader Frederick Douglass for Vice President, but he never acknowledged the nomination.
Month of the Week: May is Tennis Month – Spiders make such good tennis players because they have great topspin. / What do you call a girl standing in the middle of the tennis court. Annette
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My wildest fantasy? 14 hours of sleep followed by a buffet breakfast.--Ali Kolbert
Grammar Joke of the Week: Egyptian Grammar: It's eye before flea except after sea.
Today's Peace of History, May 10, 1980: NOW (National Organization for Women) organized 85,000 people to march in Chicago in support of Illinois's ratification of the Equal Rights Amendment to the US Constitution.
So, what's a mother's counterpart to the dad joke? Look in the mirror. / A mother's biggest sacrifice isn't the act of giving birth, it's nine months without any wine.
..........Looking through crystal spectacles.........Donovan …..Epistle to Dippy
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle May 10, 2019, Rearing ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Mom's love and laughter too. Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047
Moonbeam: I can only point out that, the higher a mind’s development, the more it discovers in the universe to occupy it. --Olaf Stapleton
Cost of War:
As of 5/9/19 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,922,451,509,187.
As of 5/2/19 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,920,214,905,402.
As of 5/9/19 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $895,442,716,965.
As of 5/2/19 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $893,922,814,685.
As of 5/9/19 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $675,356,438,705.
As of 5/2/19 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $673,445,899,724.
As of 5/9/19 Veterans Care since 2001: $309,126,444,292.
As of 5/2/19 Veterans Care since 2001: $308,692,267,518.
As of 5/9/19 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,802,377,962,456.
As of 5/2/19 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,796,276,821,943.
There is a price for enlightenment, what we pay is attention. --Stephen Gaskin
..........The wind in the willow played love's sweet melody.........Fats Domino …..Blueberry Hill
What's the difference between mothers and superheros? Superheros are only super now and then, mothers are super all the time. / I asked my mom what she wanted for Mother's Day and she said, “a bit of care and comfort”, so I put her in a nursing home.
Famous Last Words: I've lost a whole day over these people, a whole day! The Manager Six Characters In Search Of An Author
May Peace nurture your body
And Joy cuddle for your soul
prairie mama
christine


Last Laugh:


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