Friday, July 14, 2017

ePistle eXposed

Famous First Words: Careful, it's going to get cheesy... --Mac and Cheese Day Website
It is International Nude Day. A flying saucer results when a nudist spills coffee. / Never cook bacon when you're naked.
..........Way down yonder in the Indian Nation.........Woody Guthrie …..Oklahoma Hills
Peace is not unity in similarity but unity in diversity, in the comparison and conciliation of differences. --Mikhail Gorbachev
It is a cloudy Friday morning. The sky is lush and textured and beautiful; the topmost layer is blue, blue sky which is nearly all covered with cumulus bubbling up and catching a top glow from the rising sun. I can see this here and there where breaks in the lower level of smeared moisture allow; and below some gray wisps float unattached. The world smells of damp soil and soggy foliage and wet pavement. Each tree leaf sports a diamond water drop dangling from its point. Puck would not even venture out, doing his business and asking to go back inside. So the rabbit and I converse; we don't generally get to do with with Puck around cleansing the backyard of local wildlife. We listen to the birdsong, the rabbit and I; it is spirited and varied but still in the little woods across the street or down the block, not at the feeders. The only birds I see are flying high in a manner that suggest they have business somewhere soon. I breathe in the greenness and the moisture and let it out slowly. It is only thoughts of you and sweet, creamy coffee that pull me back inside to sit down and send this to you.
Hope your weekend is dressed to the nines, ePistliers
A naked person fears no pickpocket. / Always swim naked, sharks hate to peel their food.
..........Gettin' out of that old dust bowl.........Woody Guthrie …..Do Re Mi
Trivia Questions:
^ What was the Bastille, anyway?
^^ Who stormed it?
^^^ Why?
^^^^ How many prisoners were in the Bastille at the time?
^^^^^ Did anyone die during the action?
May Peace Prevail on Earth of the Week: Möge frieden auf erden sein - German
Fake Library Statistic of the Week: 100% of library computer systems are designed to ensure all the items a patron has placed on hold come in on the same day. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
Bare butts are cool. / Anne is a strict nudist; she won't even put dressing on her salad.
..........This world was lucky to see him born.........Woody Guthrie …..Dear Mrs. Roosevelt
Moonbeam: Trust in God – she will provide. --Emmeline Pankhurst
Something to Think About of the Week:

Big Hello: Muraho – Kinyarwanda (Rwanda)
Week of the Week: National Ventriloquism Week (July 12-15) – You know, not everyone appreciates ventriloquism; for instance my urologist.
Admit it, a harp is a nude piano. / A Buddhist Nudist practices yoga bare.
..........Stick some bubble gum in my mouth.........Woody Guthrie …..Mail Myself to You
^ The Bastille was a fortress built in the late 1300s to protect Paris during the Hundred Years' War. By the late 1700s, the Bastille was mostly used as a state prison by King Louis XVI.
Almanac: It is Friday, July 14, 2017. The moon will be last quarter on Sunday and is in Aries. It is International Nude Day, National Macaroni & Cheese Day, Robin Hood Days, Shark Awareness Day, and Bastille Day in France, Guiana, Polynesia, Guadel, and Martinique. In Iran it is Appointment of the Prophet and in Iraq it is Republic Day. Senegal celebrates African Community Day. Because it is the second Friday in July it is also Collector Car Appreciation Day and National Motorcycle Day.
Among those born on this day were Andrea del Sarto (1486), James Abbott McNeill Whistler (1834), Emmeline Pankhurst (1858), Gustav Klimt (1862), Owen Ister (1869), Ossip Zadkine (1890), Irving Stone (1903), Woodrow Wilson Guthrie (1912), Gerald Ford (1913), Frances Lear (1923), Harry Dean Stanton (1926), John Chancellor (1927), Polly Bergen (19320), Roosevelt Grier (1932), Chris Cross (1952), and Princess Victoria (1977).
On July fourteenth the citizens of Paris stormed the Bastille prison (1789), opium was exempted from federal tariff duty (1832), postage stamps began provisionally used (NYC, 1845), machine made ice was first demonstrated (1850), the first Industrial Exposition opened (NYC, 1853), Goddard patented his first liquid fueled rocket design (1914), the first commercial air flight landed in Hawaii (1927), Citation became the first horse to win a million dollars (1951), Greyhound bought Trailways for $80 million, and Steve Miller received a star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame (1987).
Night Sky, 7/14: Mercury is having a poor apparition low in evening twilight this month. But it's bright enough (magnitude –0.2 this evening) that you can pick it up anyway if the air is good and clear. One hour after sunset, as twilight is fading deeper and the stars are coming out, you'll find the two brightest stars of summer, Vega and Arcturus, high overhead equally far from the zenith: Vega toward the east, and Arcturus toward the southwest (depending on your location).
This Week: Saturday, July 15 – Be a Dork Day & National Give Something Away Day
Night Sky, 7/15: The tail of Scorpius is low in the south after darkness is complete ... the farther south, the higher. Look for the two stars especially close together in the tail. These are Lambda and fainter Upsilon Scorpii, known as the Cat's Eyes. They're canted at an angle; the cat is tilting his head and winking.
Sunday, July 16 – National Ice Cream Day & Hot Dog Night
Night Sky, 7/16: Venus shines brightly in the east before and during dawn. Aldebaran, much fainter, is about 5° below Venus. Mars is lost behind the glare of the Sun.
Monday, July 17 – Global Hug Your Kid Day & Wrong Way Corrigan Day
Night Sky, 7/17: Jupiter (in Virgo) shines showily in the southwest to west during evening. Spica glitters 10° left of it. Uranus (in Pisces) and Neptune (in Aquarius) await high in the southeastern side of the sky before the beginning of dawn.
Tuesday, July 18 – Nelson Mandela International Day & National Caviar Day
Wednesday, July 19 – National Hot Dog Day & Take Your Poet to Work Day
Night Sky, 7/19: Saturn glows steadily in the south during and after dusk. Fiery Antares, less bright, twinkles to Saturn's right or lower right. Delta Scorpii, the third brightest object in the area, catches the eye half as far to the upper right of Antares.
Thursday, July 20 – Moon Day & World Jump Day 
..........Your poll tax and Jim Crow and greed has got to go.........Woody Guthrie …..All You Fascists
^^ The revolutionaries who stormed the Bastille were mostly craftsmen and store owners who lived in Paris. They were members of a French social class called the Third Estate. There were around 1000 men who participated in the attack.
Funniest thing I read of the Week: ---submitted by rhb of ks 


Science Fiction Convention of the Week: ConGregate 4 / DeepSouthCon 55: July 14-16, High Point, North Carolina. http://www.con-gregate.com/
Moonbeam: I have made speeches urging women to adopt methods of rebellion such as have been adopted by men in every revolution. --Emmeline Pankhurst
Stale Late Night Snacks: New documents reveal that when Vincent Van Gogh cut off his ear, the woman he sent it to was a cleaner, not a prostitute as previously thought. You know, because otherwise it would have been weird. --Jimmy Fallon / Apparently Drumpf was unsure about the guy he was choosing for vice president all the way down to the wire. They say he wanted to dump Gov. Mike Pence at midnight the night before the announcement — which would have made him a Pence dispenser. --Jimmy Kimmel / The Republican National Convention is next week. Quick programming note — the "Late Show" will be live every single night. So tune in for a mockery of our political system — and then watch the "Late Show!" --Stephen Colbert / In California, a man playing Pokémon Go was stabbed. The man said, "It was terrifying, my lack of a life flashed before my eyes." --Conan O'Brien / Today was National Hotdog Day and to celebrate, Donald Drumpf spent a few hours on the rollers at 7-Eleven to work on his color. --Seth Meyers / Donald Drumpf has selected mega-star Scott Baio to speak at the convention. I will give you a minute to Google who that is. To tell you how irrelevant Scott Baio is, I had to have his name phonetically spelled in the teleprompter because it looks like "by-o." --James Corden --All late night snacks are left over from a year ago.
Diversity drives innovation – when we limit who can contribute, we in turn limit what problems we can solve. --Telle Whitney
Sign in the office of a clothing optional resort: Clothed for the Winter. / No, no, I said a Buddhist colony.
..........But in my life of peace your dark illusions fall.........Woody Guthrie …..Peace Call
^^^ The Third Estate had recently made demands of the king and had demanded that the commoners have more of a say in government. They were worried that he was preparing the French army for an attack. In order to arm themselves, they first took over the Hotel des Invalides in Paris where they were able to get muskets. However, they didn't have gun powder.
Worthless Fact of the Week: The first stamp issues by NY Post Office is called the New York Postmaster's Provisional. It sold for 5 cents. It featured a picture of George Washington. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_York_Postmaster's_Provisional
Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Evil Queens are just Disney Princesses who worked in Customer Service too long. --Submitted by ss of ks
Weird Word of the Week: Piepowder - “Tolkienesque” Dustyfoot. From the original Anglo-French pied-poudreux, dusty feet. http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-pie1.htm
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Dissolve a wart. Make a paste from Tang and water, apply to the wart and cover with a Band-Aid bandage to hold it in place. Repeat daily until the wart disappears. The asorbic acid can kill wart-producing virus, and together with the citric acid in the Tang will slowly dissolve it. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/tang.html
Nudists are people who wear one-button suits. / The elephant sneered at the nudist and asked, “Can you breathe through that?”
...........He loved you in the sand hills before your great fame.........Woody Guthrie …..Belle Starr
^^^^ There were only seven prisoners in the Bastille at the time. They were set free after the attack. Four of them were convicted forgers.
Word Shakespeare Made Up of the Week: Lonely – without companions; solitary. Coriolanus Act IV Scene I – Coriolanus: ...though I go alone, like to a lonely dragon, that his fen makes fear'd and talk'd of more than seen – your son.
'Nother Funniest Thing I Read: Man on train: Kansas, eh? I'm afraid of tornadoes. How do the warning sirens work? Me: A better gauge is to watch a local on their front porch. If they set down their beer, it's time to go to the basement. --submitted by mj of ks
Amazing Thing on the Internet of the Week: Monterrey Bay Aquarium – Sea Otter Cam. The southern sea otters in our Sea Otters exhibit love to play with toys, lounge in ice buckets or just snooze. We feed them four times a day, often putting the food in toys to stimulate the otters' natural behavior of pounding and working to get food out of shells. http://www.montereybayaquarium.org/animals-and-experiences/live-web-cams/sea-otter-cam
Puck the Brave Episode of the Week: Here's our fearless Puck posing in profile for the case Dreadlocks for Dandy Dinmont.
The best reason for going to work naked is your boss is always yelling, “I wanna see your ass in here by 6 am”. / If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? --George Carlin
..........There's a great and peaceful river in a land that's fair to see.........Woody Guthrie …..Roll, Columbia, Roll
^^^^^ Ninety-eight attackers and one defender died in the fighting.
Month of the Week: July is the month of the Tour de France --A large black dog crossing the road in front of Tour de France riders has caused a crash in Friday’s stage of the race. And somewhere a French cat is sitting in the sun smirking and thinking “chien fou.”
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Tax all the churches to pay for universal healthcare. It's what God would have wanted. --Submitted by fb of az
Most Beautiful Thing in the State: Florida: Caladesi Island State Park --As one of the few completely natural islands along Florida´s Gulf Coast, Caladesi´s white sand beaches were rated America's Best Beach in 2008. Beach lovers can enjoy swimming, sunbathing and beach combing. Saltwater anglers can cast a line from their boats or surf fish. Nature enthusiasts can spot wildlife while hiking the three mile nature trail through the island’s interior or paddling a three mile kayak trail through the mangroves and bay. Picnic tables and shelters are located near the beach, and picnic pavilions can be reserved for a fee. Images
Today's Peace of History, July 14, 1955: The Air Pollution Control Act of 1955 became law, the first in a series of laws that ultimately became the Clean Air Act in 1963.
  "It's just too hot to wear clothes today," said Jack as he stepped out of the shower.  “Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"    "Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
..........And the wheat fields waving and the dust clouds rolling.........Woody Guthrie …..This Land Is Your Land
Masthead of the Week: fRiday ePistle July 14, 2017. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ blab, blab, blab. Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 1800 Goodell Ct. Lawrence, KS 66046
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Have you ever noticed that all the instruments searching for intelligent life are pointed away from earth.
Moonbeam: We have to free half of the human race, the women, so that they can help free the other half. --Emmeline Pankhurst
Cost of War:
Tax dollars spent in Afghanistan: as of 7/13/17: $777,410,282,930.
Tax dollars spent in Afghanistan: as of 7/6/17: $776,751,661,012.
Tax dollars spent on the Iraq war since 2001 as of 7/13/17: $820,652,840,583.
Tax dollars spent on the Iraq war since 2001 as of 7/6/17: $820,633,591,704.
Tax dollars spent on Daesh conflict as of 7/13/17: $15,863,602,511.
Tax dollars spent on Daesh conflict as of 7/6/17: $15,762,373,063.
Tax dollars spent on the Pentagon Slush Fund as of 7/13/17: $154,462,425,235.
Tax dollars spent on the Pentagon Slush Fund as of 7/6/17: $153,899,168,149.
Tax dollars spent on all wars since 2001 as of 7/13/17: $1,773,297,286,080.
Tax dollars spent on all wars since 2001 as of 7/6/17: $1,771,921,830,147.
Unity is the secret of social progress, and service to society is the means to promote it. --Sri Sathya Sal Baba
..........Goodbye to my Juan, goodbye, Rosalita.........Woody Guthrie …..Deportee aka Plane Wreck at Los Gatos
How can you identify Ronald McDonald at a nudist colony? He's the one with the sesame seed buns.
Famous Last Words: This is John Chancellor, somewhere in custody. --after his arrest at the Republican National Convention (1964) for refusing to cede his spot on the floor to “Goldwater Girls”.
May Peace be your quilt
And Joy be your blanket
prairie mama
christine


Last Laugh:

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