Friday, June 28, 2024

fIshy ePistle

Famous First Words: I can't see. --The Manager Luigi Pirandello's Six Characters In Search Of An Author

It is Fish Are Friends Not Food Week (23-29). How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles / A little fish walks into a bar. The bartender asks, “What can I get you?” “Water,” the little fish gasps, “I need water.”

..........And the waving wheat can sure smell sweet when the wind comes right behind the rain.........Chorus …..Oklahoma (Oklahoma)

Growing up in the 1950s, you conformed to society and what it was...”obviously no one is supposed to be gay.” But, our youth, our generation was a different generation. We weren't going to be conformists to the 1950s. --Mark Segal was 18 and at Stonewall Inn on June 28, 1969.

It is a cloudy, windy Friday morning. The sky is a pale gray with splotches of darker gray but no hit of sun breaking through. There are no birds in the mulberry probably because there are no mulberries in the mulberry; and no birdsong in the air. Wind speed is officially 14 mph from the southeast. 76°F is a lovely temperature even with the breeze. Willow branches are dancing nearly horizontally. While I was still mostly asleep, Veronica the cat came into my room and began eating flowers from my bouquet. I don't remember how I reacted but the vase is still standing and the flowers are still beautiful. Yesterday was my first full day without oxycodone but my hip is not hurting and I feel fine. Ah, the hawk is on the willow, fluffing its feathers and keeping an eye out for breakfast. I always take the morning hawk as a good omen. But sipping my doctored decaf and writing to you is what really makes the morning delightful.

Hope your weekend flows like a golden moon platy, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: So an octopus can change its color to mimic its surroundings. When an octopus does this it's called mocktopus.

Must admit, fish jokes are a gill-ty pleasure of mine. / What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh

..........To hate all the people your relatives hate.........Cable …..You've Got To Be Carefully Taught (South Pacific)

Trivia Questions: Happy Paul Bunyan Day!

  • ^ According to legend, how many storks did it take to deliver Paul?
  • ^^ What geologic features were created by Paul?
  • ^^^ How big was Paul, anyway?
  • ^^^^ What do you know about his bovine companion?
  • ^^^^^ Where can you see statues of Paul?

Big Hello: Yá'át'ééh - Navajo https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Please be patient with me, I'm from the 1900s.

Image of the Week: A get well bouquet from a master gardener.

 Thank you, Terry

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: 98% of librarians are left speechless each week by something a patron says with a straight face. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

Engage your children in aquariums as a hobby and they will never have money to buy drugs or guns. / When a fish bites your heel and it looks like an eel, that's a moray.

..........Like a lark that is learning to pray..........Maria …..The Sound Of Music (Sound of Music)

Moonbeam: You forget that the fruits belong to all and that the land belongs to no one. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Blasphemy of the Week: We eliminated announcements from the service. Nobody will know what's going on but we'll beat the Methodists to the Golden Corral. --Submitted by MMS

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Shrinidhi Rai, of Pleasanton, Calif. Think of two parts of the human body that start with the same letter of the alphabet. Drop one instance of this letter. Then rearrange the remaining letters to name a third part of the human body, which isn't near the first two. What body parts are these? NPR Sunday Puzzle 6/23/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It would take a pretty stupid robot to replace me.

All the fish in my aquarium died after Frieda Fish drove that nail in the wall to hang her picture. / I have a small saltwater aquarium because the large pepperwater aquarium made everybody sneeze.

..........On a bright cloud of music shall we fly..........Anna …..Shall We Dance (The King and I)

^ Paul Bunyan was so huge at birth, it took five exhausted storks to deliver him to his parents.

Almanac: It is Friday, June 28, 2024. The moon heads into the last quarter today and is in Aries. It is Paul Bunyan Day, International Body Piercing Day, National Food Truck Day, National Logistics Day, Drive Your Corvette to Work Day, INTERNATIONAL CAP LOCKS DAY, International Lightning Safety Day, International Parrot Head Day, and Tau Day.

Among those born on this day were Jean-Jacques Rousseau (1712), Luigi Pirandello (1867), Richard Rodgers (1902), Eric Ambler (1909), Mel Brooks (1926) and John Cusack (1966).

On June twenty-eighth the first Council of Lyons opened (1245), the tomato was proven non-poisonous (1820), Labor Day was established as a federal holiday (1894), there was mutiny aboard the Potemkin (1905), Harry Truman married Bess Wallace (1919), Quiz Kids premiered on radio (1940), Amos 'n' Andy premiered on tv (1951), Daniel Ellsberg was indicted (1968), and the Fillmore East closed (1971).

Night Sky, 6/29: The last-quarter Moon (exactly last quarter at 5:53 p.m. EDT) rises late tonight, at about 1 am local daylight-saving time. Watch for it to come up below the Great Square of Pegasus. Saturn is about two fists at arm's length to the Moon's upper right. By the time dawn begins, you can see that the Moon is not quite halfway between Saturn and Mars. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Into … whatever this is

This Week: Saturday, June 29 – International Day of the Tropics & International Mud Day

Sunday, June 30 – Asteroid Day & Log Cabin Day & National Meteor Watch Day

Night Sky, 6/30: Dangling lower right from bright Vega high in the east are the main stars of Lyra, forming a small triangle and parallelogram. The two brightest stars of this pattern after Vega are the two forming the bottom of the parallelogram: Beta and Gamma Lyrae, or Sheliak and Sulafat. They're currently lined up vertically. Beta is the one on top. Beta Lyrae is an eclipsing binary. Compare it to Gamma whenever you look up at Lyra. Normally Beta is only a trace dimmer than Gamma. Eventually, however, you'll catch Beta when it is quite obviously dimmer than usual. ~~Note there will NOT be a Leap Second Time Adjustment this June 30th. So you don't have to spend any time trying to set your clock one second ahead.

Monday, July 1- Canada Day & International Tartan Day & Zip Code Day

Tuesday, July 2- I Forgot Day & National Wildland Firefighters Day

Wednesday, July 3- International Plastic Bag Free Day & Stay Out of the Sun Day

Night Sky, 7/3: Mars (magnitude 1.0, in Aries) is low in the east just before and during dawn. Look for it four or five fists at arm's length to the lower left of Saturn.

Thursday, July 4- US Independence Day & Indivisible Day & National BBQ Day

Cadet Cod was a member of the Trout Space Troopers. / Fish may have small brains but you'll never see one spend hundreds of dollars to net a human.

..........And those who say they don't agree and those who do not hear or see.........Mei Li …..100,000 Miracles (Flower Drum Song)

^^ Paul Bunyan's footprints created Minnesota's 10,000 lakes, his shovel created the Grand Canyon as it dragged behind him, and his use of rocks to extinguish a campfire created Mount Hood.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Life Lesson #843: “Analogy” Is not the study of buttholes. --Submitted by SH

Moonbeam: International business may conduct its operations with scraps of paper, but the ink it uses is human blood. --Eric Ambler

Hippy Update of the Week: I have traded the walker for my cane. I walk without my cane now and again, but I still sometimes feel wobbly. I've been to the doctor, had my big industrial strength bandage removed. The incision is about 5 inches long and looks like a dark red line down my hip. It's healing nicely, I can shower but not bathe or hot tube or swim yet. They also took new x-rays so I got to see my new hip. The best part is that it looks hip shaped which my old bones didn't. Because it's metal it looks really white next to the rest of the x-ray. Everyone said I was doing well and I feel like I'm doing well. I even took the dog for a short walk and hope to get back to doing that daily. Thank you all for your support.

Video of the Week: Jimi Hendrix live at the Fillmore East: video live from the fillmore east - Google Search (14:02)

In 1969, there was really no such thing as being “out”, Gay and Lesbian people were deeply stigmatized. Of course, it was illegal to be who you were. So, everything was underground. --Laverne Cox who was present at Stonewall Inn June 28, 1969.

Did you see that sturgeon in white tie and tails? Now, that's sofishtication. / Guru Guppy was a very religious fish. It is said she wrote Psalmons.

..........Ye kin smell it in the breeze.........Chorus …..June Is Bustin' Out All Over (Carousel)

^^^ Paul was a powerful giant, seven feet tall with a stride of seven feet. Bunyan's gigantism was a later invention; early stories do not mention it.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day. --Calvin & Hobbes

Weird Word of the Week: Lipogrammatist – strives to produce the whimsical lipogram – a sentence or poem or other work omitting all instances of a certain vowel. For instance, in 1939 Ernest Vincent Wright published a 50,000 word novel (Gadsby) without a single “e” in it. Lipogrammatist (worldwidewords.org)

Dragon of the Week: This looks like a dragon who means business.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Get your whites whiter than white. Mix one-half cup Cascade, one-half cup Clorox, and one gallon hot water in a plastic pail. Soak clothing in this mixture overnight, dump the solution and the clothes into the washing machine, and wash as usual. Add one half cup Heinz White Vinegar to the rinse water. Cascade®: Wacky Uses

Sally Salmon was so morally upright she was called the ultimate roe model. / Do you know what's better than a tuna sandwich? A threena sandwich.

...........Gettin' ready to pop, getting' ready to bust.........Mac …..The Party That We're Gonna Have Tomorrow (Pipe Dream)

^^^^ Paul's Ox, Babe, was blue and it is said that 42 axe handles and a plug of tobacco would fit between his eyes.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Debate idea: And then, for the last question, we'll ask them to repeat the five words we gave them at the start. --Submitted by MMS

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Quiet Corner Sci-Fi & Comic Experience 2024 (29, Pomfret, CT) ...bringing Pop-Culture back to Pomfret Quiet Corner Sci-Fi & Comic Experience 2024 Information | SciFiCons.com

Actual Science Conference of the Week: International Conference on Advances in Cell Biology (ICACB) (28, NYC) ...share vital and recent innovations in cell biology Science Leagues

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Neck and nape → Kneecap

Charlie the Tuna got his own television show. It's called Tuna Half Men / To catch catfish on the internet you need to use clickbait.

..........And somewhere a bird who is bound he'll be heard..........Chorus …..It's A Grand Night For Singing (State Fair)

^^^^^ There seem to be at least 31 Paul Bunyan statues in the US. But there does not seem to be an official count. Discover 30+ Paul Bunyan Statues in the US [MAP & GUIDE] (rootedwanderings.com)

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: Popeye's chicken is cooked in Olive Oil.

Quote of the Week: The guerrilla must move amongst the people as a fish swims in the sea. --Mao Zedong

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What is artificial light made of? Fauxtons --Submitted by SH

Today's Peace of History, June 28, 1959: Patrons at the Stonewall Inn, a gay bar in New York City's Greenwich Village, being subjected to routine anti-homosexual harassment by the New York City police raiding the bar, spontaneously fought back.

Fish run a large crime network in the Caribbean. The head of this underwater mafia is The Codfather. / If you're going for roemance, consider the caviar.

..........No sobs, no sorrows, no sighs.........Antipholus & Luciana …..This Can't Be Love (The Boys from Syracuse)

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, June 28, 2024, fIshy ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: People who know little are usually great talkers, while men who know much say little. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Cost of War:

  • As of 06/27/24 State Department Costs: $239,491,187,558.
  • As of 06/20/24 State Department Costs: $238,943,811,484.
  • As of 06/27/24 Homeland Security: $1,171,844,230,158.
  • As of 06/20/24 Homeland Security: $1,171,249,349,754.
  • As of 06/27/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,228,028,138,994.
  • As of 06/20/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,226,498,743.193.
  • As of 06/27/24 Military Costs: $3,092,076,974,129.
  • As of 06/20/24 Military Costs: $3,090,915,791,993.
  • As of 06/27/24 Veterans Care: $3,734,029,135,819.
  • As of 06/20/24 Veterans Care: $3,722,436,390,115.
  • As of 06/27/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,465,470,919,889.
  • As of 06/20/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,450,046,174,277.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Another policeman came out, and said something to one of the queens, and one of the queens screamed something back at him, and that's where it all began. Cans were thrown, windows were broken... Mark Segal

Famous Last Words: I've lost a whole day over these people, a whole day. --The Manager Luigi Pirandello's Six Characters In Search Of An Author

..........I could write a preface on how we met.........Joey & Linda …..I Could Write A Book (Pal Joey) All of tonight's songs are from the pen of Richard Rodgers

Do clownfish taste funny? / Oysters are so good at hiding because of clamouflage. / Barbra Blowfish is so old she has to use a herring aid.

May Peace sooth your sand
And Joy cover your place
prairie mama
christine




Last Laugh:

Friday, June 21, 2024

sOlstitial ePistle

Famous First Words: Hm, so we are here? --Jean Paul Sartre No Exit

It is the Summer Solstice 2024. So, I entered “summer solstice jokes” in my browser. The very first result was a joke of its own: www.amazon.com Shop summer jokes – Amazon.com® Official Site Discover new arrivals & latest discounts in summer jokes from your favorite brands. (Then it tried to talk me into Prime.) I don't have a favorite brand of joke; I'm not even sure I know what brands of jokes are. I acknowledge genres ... walks into a bar / knock, knock / How many ... does it take to change a light bulb). Maybe brands are the names of comics. I'd like 3 Nora Ephrons, 2 Geroge Carlins, and a Tig Notaro, please. Oh, and throw in a couple of Mae West quotes.

..........Summertime, and the livin' is easy.........Janice Joplin …...Summertime Porgy and Bess

Extremism can flourish only in an environment where basic governmental social responsibility for the welfare of the people is neglected. --Benazir Bhutto

It is gorgeous Friday (74°F) morning. The Cooper's Hawk aka Red Shouldered Hawk and his or her hunting companion stopped at the willow tree briefly on their way to breakfast. There is no breeze so the branches of all the trees are still. Some robins are flitting through the mulberry picking any berries that have ripened since yesterday. A lone hawk now sits higher up than usual sunning itself as the sun slowly emerges from over the rooftops and from under the clouds. Clearly, looking majestic tops this hawks agenda for the day. There is no bird song filling the air, only the grumbling of car motors as people go off to work. Wow! I had to stop and take a dump and a nap. While this makes less pleasant reading, it is as important to the rest of my day as the chocolate croissant and cup of decaf I consumed. Now, the sun is up and a breeze is wisping the willow and mulberry in a graceful dance of the morning. I can walk without pain or creaking bones. All and all a great day.

Hope your weekend is full of sunshine, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Having cats in the house is like living with art that sometimes throws up on the carpet. --Submitted by Heinlein Society

Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability. --Sam Keen / Thank you for making the longest day of the year longer by explaining why it's the longest day of the year.

..........Walking on the sidewalk, hotter than a match head.........The Lovin' Spoonful …..Summer in the City

Trivia Questions: The Ferris Wheels turns 131 years old today.

  • ^ When or where did the first Ferris Wheel turn?
  • ^^ What do you know about the inventor, George W Ferris?
  • ^^^ How big was the first Ferris Wheel?
  • ^^^^ How many Ferris Wheels are currently operational in the US?
  • ^^^^^ Where is the world's tallest operational Ferris Wheel?

Big Hello: Ecomower or Ekamowir omo – Nauruan (Micronesia) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Soul Train lasted longer than the Confederacy. (35 years to 4 years, 3 months respectively).

Image of the Week: And the hollyhock dolls from my patch.

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: Only 8% of librarians really mean it when they respond, “Wow!” to a patron's story. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

Some of the best memories are made in flip-flops. --Kellie Elmore / The Kansas Sunflowers are so excited about the solstice they wet their plants.

..........It happened forever, for a short time.........The Motels …..Suddenly Last Summer

Moonbeam: I live a very dull life here...indeed I think I am more like a state prisoner than anything else. --Martha Washington

Blasphemy of the Week: There ought to be a sign posted in every “Christian” bookstore that reads, “The views expressed in these books do not necessarily express the views of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.”. --Voddie Baucham

Puzzle of the Week: Think of a famous English writer with a three-word name. The first two letters of the last name followed by the first two letters of the middle name followed by the first two letters of the first name, in order, spell an adjective that describes this author today. Who is it?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: In 100 years we have gone from teaching Latin and Greek in high school to teaching remedial reading in college. --Joseph Sobran --Submitted by bc of tx

June has never looked more beautiful than she does now, unadorned and honest, vulnerable yet invincible. --Marie Lu / The Kansas cottonwoods are so excited about the solstice; it was such a re-leaf.

..........My love, warm as the sunshine.........Johnny Rivers …..Summer Rain

^ The Ferris Wheel was invented in 1893 for the Chicago World's Fair.

Almanac: It is Friday, June 21, 2024. The moon will be full (Strawberry) tomorrow morning at 1:07 am and is in Capricorn. It is Cuckoo Warning Day, Atheists Solidarity Day aka World Humanist Day, Go Skateboarding Day, National Daylight Appreciation Day, National Flip Flop Day, Summer Solstice, Take Your Dog to Work Day, and Ugliest Dog Day.

Among those born on this day were Martha Washington (1732), Daniel Carter Beard (1851), Jean-Paul Sartre (1905), Mary McCarthy (1912), Jane Russell (1921), Judy Holliday (1922), Maureen Stapleton (1925), Francoise Sagan (1935), Meredith Baxter Birney (1944), Michael Gross (1947), Benazir Bhutto (1953), and Prince William of Wales (1982).

On June twenty-first New Hampshire ratified the US Constitution (1788), the first Ferris Wheel premiered (Chicago, 1893), the Hawaiian Red Cross was founded (1917), former Attorney General, John Mitchell and former Chief of Staff, H.R. Haldeman began 19 month sentences in an Alabama prison (1977), and Donald Fagan and Walter Becker announced the break up of Steely Dan (1981).

Night Sky, 6/21: The Strawberry Full Moon arrives at 9:10 pm tonight. But the best viewing will be 5 to 10 minutes later/ http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Mom and Dad with two Medieval Dragons

This Week: Saturday, June 22 – Great American Backyard Campout Day & International Being You Day & World Rainforest Day

Sunday, June 23 - America's Kids Day & International Women in Engineering Day & Let It Go Day

Night Sky, 6/23: Jupiter is emerging into view almost three fists lower left of Mars, shining through the horizon murk at magnitude -2.0 as dawn brightens. Neptune (8th magnitude in Pisces) arrives pre dawn.

Monday, June 24 – Celebration of the Senses & International Fairy Day & World UFO Day

Tuesday, June 25 – Day of the Seafarer & Global Smurfs Day & National Catfish Day

Wednesday, June 26 – Harry Potter Day & National Canoe Day & National Coconut Day

Night Sky, 6/26: June Bootids Meteor Shower (Bootes constellation) https://in-the-sky.org/news.php?id=20240627_10_100

Thursday, June 27 – Celebrate Joy Day & International Workers of the World Day & National Handshake Day & PTSD Awareness Day

I am summer, come to lure you away from your computer...come dance on my fresh grass, dig your toes into my beaches. --Oriana Green / Summer is such a crazy time. The frogs are wearing open-toad sandals and the bananas are wearing sunscreen so they won't peel.

..........Dust off the sun and moon and sing a song of cheer.........Nat King Cole ….Those Lazy, Hazy, Crazy Days of Summer

^^ Ferris was a bridge builder who came up with the concept of the Ferris Wheel and sketched it on a cocktail napkin at an Engineer's Banquet in 1891.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Orion's Belt is a big waist of space. Terrible joke. Only three stars.

Moonbeam: You are the hero of your own story --Mary McCarthy

Supreme Question of the Week: It's weird how the focus is on whether the gifts were reported, instead of why they were received. --John Collins

Hippy Update of the Week: My latest problem is finding a comfortable position to sleep in at night. I'm only getting a couple of hours of sleep and it's making being awake unpleasant. My hip – it's doing great, hurts less all the time, my exercises allow for more extension and less pain. We changed the dressing today and the incision is healing nicely. If I could just sleep a few more hours a day. Friday Morning Update: I slept through the night – 7 hours. Maybe a new hip like a new baby just needs time to be able to make it through the night. I feel much better.

Addendum to Hippy Update of the Week: People who want to visit – this is the week. Monday morning is taken up with Scrabble and Wednesday afternoon with a doctor appointment. The rest of the week is open.

Video of the Week: Film of the first Ferris Wheel (:47) film first ferris wheel chicago 1893 - Google Search

Democracy is necessary to peace and to undermining the forces of terrorism. --Benazir Bhutto

The summer night is like a perfection of thought. --Wallace Stevens / Lots of people go camping in the summer. For me, it's just too in-tents.

..........I saw a Deadhead sticker on a cadillac.........Don Henley …..The Boys of Summer

^^^ The first wheel was 264 feet high and could carry 60 passengers in each of its 36 cars. A ride cost only 50¢ (the equivalent of $10.52 today.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Spices were first brought to Western Europe in the Middle Ages. Some of them are still at the back of my cupboard.

Weird Word of the Week: Kip – nap or longer sleep. Likely from the Danish Kippe – hut or ale house. Kip (worldwidewords.org)

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Preserve newspaper clippings. Dissolve one capful of Phillips; Milk of Magnesia in one quart Canada Dry Club Soda. Let the mixture stand overnight. The next day, stir the mixture well, then soak you clipping in the solution for one hour. Blot the newspaper clipping between two sheets of Bounty and place on a screen to dry. Canada Dry® Club Soda: Wacky Uses

Summertime is always that best of what might be. --Charles Bowden / Watermelon – when you go on red and stop on green.

...........A pledge to keep the sun above........Of the Wand and the Moon ..Song of Summer Solstice

^^^^ The total number of Ferris Wheels in the United States is 52.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My life coach just informed me that I didn't make the team.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: SoonerCon 2024 (21-23, Norman, OK) ...Adventure Awaits Soonercon | Oklahoma's Premier Pop Culture Convention

Actual Science Conference of the Week: SoSE 2024 (System of Systems Engineering)(23-24, Tacoma, WA) AI Role in SoSE SOSE 2024 – System of Systems Engineering Conference (sosengineering.org)

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Edgar Rice Burroughs → BU RI ED

In summer the song sings itself above the muffled words. --William Carlos Williams / A group of sunshine particles is known as a ray brigade.

..........We were young and restless.........Bryan Adams …..Summer of 69

^^^^^ High Roller is a 550 ft tall Ferris Wheel on the Las Vegas Strip in Paradise, NV. It opened in 2014 as the world tallest Ferris Wheel.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: 3 Conspiracy Theorists walk into a bar; you can't tell me that's just a coincidence.

Quote of the Week: Not only is it summer solstice, there is a full moon. May love surround you like sunshine on a sunny day. --William Shakespeare

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Counting to 10 only makes it premeditated.

Today's Peace of History, June 21, 1997: 100,000 marched in solidarity with striking newspaper workers in Detroit after nearly two years on the picket line.

I was rich, if not in money, in sunny hours and summer days. --Henry David Thoreau / How did the sun get all those degrees when it didn't go to college?

..........Summer's here and the time is right.........Martha and the Vandellas …..Dancin' In The Streets

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, June 21, 2024, sOlstitial ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: If you are lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company. --Jean-Paul Sartre

Cost of War:

  • As of 06/20/24 State Department Costs: $238,943,811,484.
  • As of 06/06/24 State Department Costs: $237,822,734,407.
  • As of 06/20/24 Homeland Security: $1,171,249,349,754.
  • As of 06/06/24 Homeland Security: $1,170,031,635,897.
  • As of 06/20/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,226,498,743.193.
  • As of 06/06/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,223,367,154,515.
  • As of 06/20/24 Military Costs: $3,090,915,791,993.
  • As of 06/06/24 Military Costs: $3,088,538,087,502.
  • As of 06/20/24 Veterans Care: $3,722,436,390,115.
  • As of 06/06/24 Veterans Care: $3,698,697,915,564.
  • As of 06/20/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,450,046,174,277.
  • As of 06/06/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,418,458,893,821.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The military wants a system that protects its policies and privileges. --Benazir Bhutto

Famous Last Words: (a pause) My name is Fred. Jean Paul Satre The Respectful Prostitute

..........We need a change now, wouldn't it be nice.........The Beach Boys ….Summer In Paradise

I expect some new phase of life this summer, and shall try to get the honey from each moment. --Lucy Stone / It's summer in Kansas, even the bees say it's swarm.

May Peace sooth your brain
And Joy cool your soul
prairie mama
christine



Last Laugh:


Wednesday, June 12, 2024

eXtra ePistle

Tomorrow I check in for surgery at 5:30 am. I said, “my, that's early.” and she said, “You're first.” I expect to be back home sometime Friday. Here's a junior ePistle to tide you over...and because, apparently, I am incapable of NOT doing an ePistle.

........And if you get busted in your hip and now you're an artificial hippie.........Roy Zimmerman …..Psychedelic Relic "Psychedelic Relic" by Roy Zimmerman (youtube.com)

Today is Mechanics Day! I asked my mechanic why my car was humming. She said it probably doesn't know the words.

Today is Wednesday, June 12, 2013. The moon enters the first quarter (exactly first-quarter at 1:18 am tonight EDT). The Moon shines at the Leo-Virgo border, two fists upper left of Regulus and three fists right of Spica, the brightest stars of the two constellations.

Wednesday, June 12– Crowded Nest Awareness Day & Loving Day & World Day Against Child Labor

Night Sky, 6/12: Mercury, Venus, Jupiter, Uranus, and Neptune are veiled by the sun's glare.

Thursday, June 13– LGBTQIA+ Equal Pay Awareness Day & Random Acts of Light Day & Roller Coaster Day

Friday, June 14 – Flag Day & National Bourbon Day & Blood Donor Day & National Movie Night

Saturday, June 15 – Global Wind Day & International Surfing Day & Native American Citizenship Day

Night Sky, 6/15: As the stars come out in North America, the Moon shines nearly midway between Spica to its lower left and fainter Gamma Virginis (Porrima) to its upper right. Gamma Vir is a lovely, equal-brightness double star for telescopes, separation 3.4 arcseconds this year; it's slowly widening. The pair is oriented almost north-south. This Week's Sky at a Glance, June 7 – 16 - Sky & Telescope - Sky & Telescope (skyandtelescope.org)

Sunday, June 16 – Bloomsday & Father's Day & Day 1: Eid-Al-Adha & Fudge Day

Monday, June 17 – National Garbage Hauler Day & World Crocodile Day & World Tessellation Day

Night Sky, 6/17: Mars and Venus are in a nice view just as dawn begins. The highest and easiest is Saturn, in the southeast. It's magnitude 1.2, fairly modest, but there's nothing else that bright anywhere near it. Its background is dim Aquarius.

Tuesday, June 18 – Autistic Pride Day & International Sushi Day

Wednesday, June 19 – Juneteenth & World Sickle Cell Awareness Day & World Sauntering Day

Thursday, June 20 – National Hike With A Geek Day & American Eagle Day.

Night Sky, 6/20: At 4:51 p.m. EDT (1:51 p.m. PDT and 20:51 GMT), the sun will reach its northernmost declination for the year, delivering the maximum daylight hours of the year for the Northern Hemisphere and the minimum daylight hours of the year for the Southern Hemisphere. The June solstice marks the beginning of the summer season in the Northern Hemisphere, and winter in the Southern Hemisphere. Night sky, June 2024: What you can see tonight [maps] | Space

We will not quietly stand by and watch our world go up in flames and radiation. --Randall Forsberg Randall was the founder of the Nuclear Freeze Campaign which rallied 1,000,000 people in New York's Central Park to call for a halt to worldwide nuclear testing. (June 12, 1982)

I just finished a novel about airplane mechanics. It was mostly riveting.

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, June 12, 2024, supplemental ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.




Friday, June 7, 2024

eXculpatory ePistle

Famous First Words: The first constitution, granted by King Kamehameha III... The 1839 Constitution

A “tribute” to trials lawyers and the verdicts they invoke. Actually there are only three lawyer jokes, the rest are either true stories or rumors. Being a defense lawyer is like being Nickelback, the better I am at my job the worse the world becomes.

..........Hurricane Annie tore the roof off a church.........Prince …..Sign 'O The Times (10)

God hath made of one blood all nations... --Constitution of the Nation of Hawaii

It is a beautiful Friday morning. The sky is a deep blue without clouds or jet trails, but plenty of birds. 68°F is a nearly perfect temperature for walking or sitting, sipping coffee on the patio while a 2 mph wind barely moves the willow branches and is like a small whisper on the face. Puck is deep into his early morning nap on his pillow. I watch birds come to the mulberry searching the dwindling berries for the tasty ripe one. A Cooper's Hawk (aka red shouldered hawk) sits high in the willow limbs, preening her feathers and surveying the neighborhood. What a beautiful bird – and silent too. I take a bite of my cream filled donut – it is donut day, afterall – and savor the sweet, dark icing. But with a long sip of creamy decaf, I sit down to the real business of the morning – writing to you. What a gas...

Hope your weekend is free of legal entanglements, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Stop chasing your dreams! Follow your dreams at a sustainable pace until they get tired and lie down. --Submitted by SH

The judge asked the defendant whether he wanted a bench trial or a jury trial. “Jury,” Do you understand the difference? “Yes, a jury trial is where twelve ignorant people decided my fate instead of just one.”

..........I know Mars could not be too far behind..........Prince ….The Most Beautiful Girl In The World (9)

Trivia Questions: Happy Doughnut aka Donut Day!

  1. The name doughnut came later, do you know what they were called originally?

  2. What do you know about the word doughnut or donut?

  3. Who thought up the hole?

  4. When or where or by whom were jelly filled donuts introduced?

  5. What was the very first national donut chain?

Big Hello: Nitze – Nahuatl (Uto-Aztecan, central Mexico) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What do you get when someone is a lawyer and a librarian? You'll get all the information you need, but you won't understand any of it.

Image of the Week: And here they are in bloom – red and white and pink

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: Did you know that the benefits of reading outweigh any negatives caused by eating cake? https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

Your honor,” began the defense attorney, “my client has been characterized as an incorrigible liar and thief, without a single socially redeemable quality. I intend to disprove that.” How will you do this?” the judge inquired. “By proving beyond a shadow of doubt that the death threats he sent were written on recycled paper.”

..........I only wanted one time to see you laughing..........Prince …..Purple Rain (8)

Moonbeam: Dress for the life you want, not the life you have. --Beau Brummell

Blasphemy of the Week: Man is the most insane species. He worships an invisible God and destroys a visible Nature. Unaware that this Nature he's destroying is this God he's worshipping. -Hubert Reeves

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Bob Fecho, of New York City. Think of a well-known actor of the past whose last name is also a brand name. Remove the last letter of the actor's first name and you'll have a product produced by that brand. Who is the actor and what is the brand? NPR Sunday Puzzle 6/2/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Most orchestras are just 1800s cover bands. --Submitted by sb of ar

The defense lawyer was cross examining a witness. “Isn't it true that you were given $500 to throw this case?” But the witness just stared out the window and if she hadn't heard the question. The attorney repeated the question but there was still no response. So the judge said, “Answer the question.” And the witness answered, “Sorry, I thought he was talking to you.”

..........Color me takin' aback, baby..........Prince …..U Got The Look (7)

1) When donuts first appeared in the early 1800s, they were called “oily cakes” because they were deep-fried.

Almanac: It is Friday, June 7, 2024. The moon was new yesterday (6/6) and is in Gemini. It is National Chocolate Ice Cream Day, Boone (Daniel) Day, Positive Power of Humor and Creativity Days, Banana Split Days, and Bahamas Labour Day. Because it is the first Friday, it is also Doughnut Day (aka Donut Day).

Among those born on this day were Beau Brummel (1778), Susan Blow (1843), Paul Gauguin (1848), Robert Mulliken (1896), Jessica Tandy (1909), Dean Martin (1917), Rocky Graziano (1922), Tom Jones (1940), and Mark Wahlberg (1971).

On June seventh Louis XIV was crowned king of France (1692), the Hawaiian Declaration of Rights was signed (1839), Lincoln was re-nominated by the Republican party (1864), the monotype type-casting machine was patented (1887), Papagena (aka Asteroid #471) was discovered (1901), the NY Times agreed to capitalize the n in "Negro" (1930), the first microbiology laboratory was dedicated (NJ, 1954). The Rolling Stones first appeared on television (Thank Your Lucky Stars, 1963), and Prince, on his 35th birthday, changed his name to an unpronounceable symbol (1993).

Day Sky, 6/7: Daytime Arietids Meteor Shower. The most intense daylight meteor shower of the year. Source unknown. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Junior Firefighters and Sparky

This Week: Saturday, June 8 – Ghostbusters Day & Upsy Daisy Day & World Gin Day & World Oceans Day

Sunday, June 9 – Race Unity Sunday & National Archives Day & Toy Industry Day

Night Sky, 6/9: The Big Dipper has now swung around to hang down by its handle high in the northwest after dark. The middle star of its handle is Mizar with tiny little Alcor right next to it. On which side of Mizar should you look for Alcor? As always, on the side toward Vega! Which is now the brightest star in the east.

Monday, June 10 – AA Founders Day & National Egg Roll Day & National Forklift Safety Day

Tuesday, June 11 – National Cotton Candy Day & National Get Outdoors Day & Day 1 of Shavuot

Wednesday, June 12 – Crowded Nest Awareness Day & Loving Day & World Day Against Child Labor

Night Sky, 6/12: Mercury, Venus, Jupiter, Uranus, and Neptune are veiled by the sun's glare.

Thursday, June 13 – LGBTQIA+ Equal Pay Awareness Day & Random Acts of Light Day & Roller Coaster Day

Friday, June 14 – No ePistle – I'll be recovering from surgery – catch you on the flip side.

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50? Representative Matt Gaetz. / What never works when it's fixed? A jury

..........'Cause I was a bit too leisurely..........Prince …..Raspberry Beret (6)

2) The word donut comes from the early English phrase “to doughnut”, meaning to perform something in a pointless, repetitive manner. Nowadays it just describes the shape.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: So, we know the speed of light, but how fast is dark?

Moonbeam: While it is never safe to affirm that the future of Physical Science has no marvels in store even more astonishing than those of the past, it seems probable that most of the grand underlying principles have been firmly established and that further advances are to be sought chiefly in the rigorous application of these principles to all the phenomena which come under our notice. --Robert Mulliken

My Own Conspiracy Theory of the Week: The Supreme Wives Club is not a new thing, it dates back at least to the Roman Empire where wives and mothers schemed, maimed, and killed to get their husbands and/or sons on the throne. Livia helped put her husband, Augustus, on the throne and killed or banished all the competition so her son, Tiberius, could inherit it.

Video of the Week: Prince: When Doves Cry (3:45) video prince - Google Search

God has bestowed certain rights alike to ... all people of all lands. --Constitution of the Nation of Hawaii

I enjoyed the courtroom as just another stage but not as amusing as Broadway. --Mae West

..........Get the Funk Up..........Prince …..Batdance (5)

3) A young sailor named Hanson Gregory came up with the idea of cutting out the center making the donuts easier to cook evenly all the way through. (c. 1847)

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Pepsi and Coke can't even be in the same restaurant together and we want world peace. --Submitted by bc of tx

Weird Word of the Week: Jumentous – smelling like the urine of a horse. Jumentous (worldwidewords.org)

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Change blond hair dyed green by chlorine back to its original color/ Simply rinse your green hair with Canada Dry Club Soda. Canada Dry® Club Soda: Wacky Uses

The courtroom is a quiet place, Judge Roberts, where you park your political ideology, and you call the balls and you call the strikes. --Lindsey Graham

...........U got the horn so why don't u blow it..........Prince …..Cream (4)

4) The first jelly-filled donuts were introduced by Adolph Levitt as part of the Salvation Army's Donuts for Soldiers campaign. Long Johns appear at about this same time.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When I'm feeling down, I just remind myself that a trillion dollars worth of propaganda didn't work on me. --Submitted by MMS

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Sci-Fi Valley Con 2024 (7-9, Altoona, PA) Step into a world of warmth and wonder... Sci-Fi Valley Con | June 7-9, 2024 | Altoona, PA (scifivalleycon.com)

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 55th Annual Meeting American Physical Society Division of Atomic, Molecular and Optical Physics (3-7, Ft Worth, TX) Keynote by Nobel Laureate, Ann L'Huillier... Meetings - Unit - DAMOP (aps.org)

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Alec Guinness … Ale

At the beginning of a big trial, the presiding judge says, “Let the record show that the prosecuting attorney has gifted me ten thousand dollars to find the case in her favor. And let the record also show that the defense attorney has gifted me fifteen thousand dollars to find the case in his favor. So I shall do the ethical thing – I will return five thousand dollars to the defense and judge the case strictly on its merits.”

..........A world of never-ending happiness..........Prince …..Let's Go Crazy (3)

5) Krispy Kreme was a regional donut corporation that began to offer franchises in the 1950s. Bonus Fact: The US produces more than 10 billion donuts each year.

Sign of the Week: Marquee in front of a Texas church: Whoever prayed for rain, please, pray for my bank account. --Submitted by bc of tx

Quote of the Week: Medical science has made such tremendous progress that there is hardly a healthy human left. --Aldous Huxley

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you ever feel lonely, never forget that the Curiosity Rover (on Mars) is programmed to sing Happy Birthday to itself every year.

Today's Peace of History, June 7, 1997: 7 activists were arrested for distributing copies of the Bill of Rights outside the Bradbury Science Museum, part of Los Alamos National Laboratory in NM, the primary nuclear research facility in the US.

In a small Texas town, Drummond's bar began construction on a new building to increase their business. The local Baptist church started a campaign to block the bar from opening with petitions and prayers. Work progressed right up till the week before opening when lightning struck the bar and it burned to the ground. The church folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, until the bar owner sued the church on the grounds that the church was ultimately responsible for the demise of his building, either through direct or indirect actions or means. The church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise in its reply to the court. As the case made its way into court, the judge looked over the paperwork. At the hearing he commented, 'I don't know how I'm going to decide this, but as it appears from the paperwork, we have a bar owner who believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that does not.'

..........You don't have to be cool..........Prince …..Kiss (2)

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, June 7. 2024, eXculpatory ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: The only time success comes before work is in the dictionary. --Rocky Graziano

Cost of War:

  • As of 06/06/24 State Department Costs: $237,822,734,407.
  • As of 05/30/24 State Department Costs: $237,256,364,747.
  • As of 06/06/24 Homeland Security: $1,170,031,635,897.
  • As of 05/30/24 Homeland Security: $1,169,416,424,936.
  • As of 06/06/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,223,367,154,515.
  • As of 05/30/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,221,785,165,967.
  • As of 06/06/24 Military Costs: $3,088,538,087,502.
  • As of 05/30/24 Military Costs: $3,087,336,946,327.
  • As of 06/06/24 Veterans Care: $3,698,697,915,564.
  • As of 05/30/24 Veterans Care: $3,686,705,952,112.
  • As of 06/06/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,418,458,893,821.
  • As of 05/30/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,402,502,154,698.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

These are some of the rights which He has given alike to every man and every chief, life, limb, liberty, labor of our hands, and productions of our mind. --Constitution of the Nation of Hawaii

Famous Last Words: It's our time down here. --Final words of The Goonies released 6/7/85

..........An ocean of violets in bloom.........Prince …..When Doves Cry (Billboard's Number 1 Prince hit)

I just settled a divorce over the visitation rights of a parrot. Neither may teach it negative phrases about the other. I went to law school for this. --Michael Adler.

May Peace present your evidence
And Joy be your verdict
prairie mama
christine



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