pEnned ePistle

 Famous First Words: Now know ye that the said Council... Great Patent of the Plymouth Colony

November is National Memoir Writing Month & National Novel Writing Month. Excited by a friend's first story sale, I asked what she was going to buy with the money. She shrugged and said, “I don't know, a candy bar?” / “Let me live, love, and say it well in good sentences.” — Sylvia Plath

Frankly, I'm fed up with politicians in Washington lecturing the rest of us about family values. Our families have values. But our government doesn't. --Bill Clinton

It is gray Friday morning. The sky is hazy with a thin cloud cover and sports puffs of white here and there beneath the cover. A 16 mph wind blows from the south making the willow branches dance the twist and the nearly bare branches of the mulberry waves in the cool (47°F) air. Our local murder of crows has come. They sang their raspy song and departed. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was hurrying through this intro so I could be ready to go shopping when we picked up the rental car, but Enterprise won't have a car until Tuesday. Grumble, grumble !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Puck is asleep on his pillow making comfortable little snuffling noises. I am sipping well sweetened and creamed decaf and hoping and against hope that I can concentrate on writing to you instead of my empty pantry. Sorry.

Make your weekend worth writing about, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When I ask you what you're thinking about and you say, “Nothing,” is that 'nothing' as in the Infinite Void, the emptiness of Zen, the nothingness of Sartre and Lacan, ex nihilo nihil fit, or what? --Submitted by bu of ks

Why don't writers stare out of the window in the morning? Because, then, they'd have nothing to do in the afternoon. / “You can fix anything but a blank page.” ―Nora Roberts

..........And though we are as nothing to the stars that shine above.........James Taylor …..There We Are

Trivia Questions: It's International Stout Day!

^ What makes a stout a stout?
^^ Stout – fewer or more calories than beer?
^^^ What nutritional benefits does Stout contain?
^^^^ Beer is 5000 years old; how old is Stout?
^^^^^ Finally, what is the difference between Stout and Porter?

Big Hello: Labas – Lithuanian https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Venus Flytraps can live on sunlight and soil nutrients alone...but every morning they wake up and choose violence. --Submitted by ma of va

Image of the Week: A Dragon of Earthsea created by Ursula Le Guin ~~My favorite thing about these dragons was that they could lie in the old tongue. Wizard could use the old tongue but could not lie in it.

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: What librarians are currently pondering: *23% Why me? *20% Why now? *50% Where is my caffeine? https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

A visitor to a certain college paused to admire the new Hemingway Hall that had been built on campus. “It’s a pleasure to see a building named for Ernest Hemingway,” he said. “Actually,” said his guide, “it’s named for Joshua Hemingway. No relation.” The visitor was astonished. “Was Joshua Hemingway a writer, too?” “Yes, indeed,” said his guide. “He wrote a check.” / “The freelance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps.” – Robert Benchley

..........Darlin' you can count on me.........James Taylor & Carly Simon …..Devoted To You

Moonbeam: Truth crushed to ground will rise again. --William Cullen Bryant

Question of the Week: What's the fastest way to make a situation awkward? --Questions by Quora

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Mark Oshin, of Portland, Ore. Name a country. The first syllable spells something that people do. The rest of the name is an anagram of where some people do that. What country is it? NPR Sunday Puzzle 10/28/23

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I started a new exercise routine. Everyday I do diddly-squats. --Submitted by ss of kc

I once asked this literary agent what writing paid the best. He said ransom notes. / "I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done." – Steven Wright

..........There's nothin' you can do to turn me away........Carly Simon …..The Right Thing To Do

^ Stout is a dark, heavy-bodied beer popular in England and Ireland. Stouts are stronger versions of ale.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 3, 2023. The moon goes into the last quarter on Sunday (11/5) and is in Cancer. It is Cliché Day, Public Television Day, Sadie Hawkins Day, Sandwich Day, and Stout Day. Because it is the first Friday in November it is also World Community Day. This is a holiday created in 1945 as a day to pray for peace.

Among those born on this day were John Montague (Earl of Sandwich, 1718), Stephen Fuller Austin (1793), William Cullen Bryant (1794), Karl Baedeker (1801), Andre Malraux (1901), Russell B Long (1918), Charles Bronson (1922), Ken Berry (1930), Michael Dukakis (1933), Lulu (1948), Roseanne Barr (1952), and Dennis Miller (1953).

On November third the Great Patent was granted to Plymouth Colony (1620), Spain "acquired" Louisiana (1762), Washington disbanded the Continental Army (1783), John Menard became the first black man elected to Congress (1868), Grant was elected president (1868), McKinley was elected president (1896), the first national automobile show opened (NYC, 1900), the British "acquired" Qatar (1916), the Bank of Italy became the Bank of America (1930), Birdseye marketed the first frozen peas (1952), LBJ soundly defeated Barry Goldwater (1964), Allende was inaugurated president in Chile (1970), Carly Simon married James Taylor (1972), the secret Iran arms deal story broke (1986), and Bill Clinton was elected president (1992).

Night Sky, 11/3: Spot bright Altair high in the southwest soon after dark. Brighter Vega is far to its right. Two distinctive little constellations lurk above Altair: Delphinus the Dolphin, hardly more than a fist at arm's length to its upper left, and smaller, fainter Sagitta the Arrow, slightly less far to Altair's upper right. Is your sky too bright for them? Use binoculars! http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: The frost is on the pumpkin, and so are the boys.

This Week: Saturday, November 4 – National Candy Day & National Play Outside Day & Sadie Hawkins Day

Sunday, November 5 – Daylight Savings Ends … Firewood Day & Zero Tasking Day

Night Sky, 11/5: After dark this week, Capella shines in the northeast. The Pleiades are up in the east-northeast three fists to Capella's right. As evening grows later, you'll find orange Aldebaran climbing below the Pleiades. Then by about 10 pm (depending on your location), Orion clears the eastern horizon below Aldebaran.

Monday, November 6 – Color The Word Orange Day & National Basketball Day & Saxophone Day

Tuesday, November 7 – Employee Brotherhood Day & International Day of Medical Physics & Notary Public Day

Wednesday, November 8 – Abet and Aid Punsters Day & Dunce Day & National S.T.E.M./S.T.E.A.M. Day & Shakespeare Authorship Mystery Day

Night Sky, 11/8: Neptune, magnitude 7.8 at the Aquarius-Pisces border, is high in early evening 25° east of Saturn. Neptune is only 2.3 arcseconds wide: harder to resolve as a ball than Uranus is, but definitely non stellar at high power.

Thursday, November 9 – Carl Sagan Day & Kristallnacht & World Freedom Day

A hungry lion roamed through the jungle looking for his next meal when he came upon two men. One man was sitting under a tree reading a book. The other man was writing in a notebook. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that reader’s digest and writers cramp. / "Start writing, no matter what. The water does not flow until the faucet is turned on." – Louis L'Amour

..........He's gonna buy me a diamond ring..........James Taylor and Carly Simon …..Mockingbird

^^ Stout has fewer calories. Thick and frothy, and with an alcohol content of up to eight per cent, it’s understandable why stout is often misunderstood as packing more calories than other types of beer. The truth is, a mug of stout can have up to 50 fewer calories than other brews.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The only thing we have to fear is being shot anywhere we go.

Moonbeam: Passports. On arrival at a Syrian port the traveler's passport is sometimes asked for but an ordinary visiting-card will answer the purpose equally well. --Karl Baedeker (This would have been in the mid 1800s.)

Video of the Week: Roseanne Barr's first tv appearance (back when she was actually funny: 3:08) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nXfaQeYXaH0

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: What will be the hot costume this Halloween? It's a killer whale with a yacht on it's back with a Supreme Court Justice on top of it. --Paula Poundstone The disgraced billionaire. The costume comes with its own lawyer. --Alonzo Bodden Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 10/28/23

The price of doing the same old thing is far higher than the price of change. --Bill Clinton

They say writers are very tolerant people. I agree. My alcohol tolerance and pain tolerance both went up when I began to write. / "The scariest moment is always just before you start." --Stephen King

.........And don't speak too soon for the wheel's still in spin.........James Taylor and Carly Simon …..The Times They Are A-changin'

^^^ According to researchers from the University of Wisconsin in the US, stout possesses antioxidants not found in other lagers. What’s more, it also contains traces of iron. It turns out the high-temperature roasting process that is required to develop the smooth finish of dark malts also fuels the formation of antioxidants.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Bacon is the duct tape of food. --Submitted by bc of tx

Weird Word of the Week: Herf – a lively gathering of cigar-smoking comrades who meet in a club, restaurant, cigar store, or home to share their appreciation of fine cigars. (herfers, herfnicks and herfaholics...) https://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-her2.htm

Dragon of the Week: Dragon Sculpture by Sanja Šubašić

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Cover a Compost Bin. Drape a large sheet of Bubble Wrap over the sides of the pile. The Bubble Wrap cover can protect a sufficiently moist compost bin from rain or keep moisture in the compost bin when the sun is out. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/bubblewrap2.html

I wanna be a fiction writer when I grow up so I'm studying journalism. / "A man's grammar, like Caesar's wife, should not only be pure, but above suspicion of impurity." – Edgar Allan Poe

...........He's a gentleman lost at the fair.........Carly Simon …..Mind On My Man

^^^^ The first known use of the word stout as a spirit was in a document dated 1677 found in the Egerton Manuscript, the sense being that a stout beer was a strong beer not a dark beer.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I have officially quit eating tacos for good. Now I only eat tacos for evil.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Doxacon 2023 (3-5, Falls Church, VA) “Doxacon Prime of Washington, DC is sponsored by Protection of the Holy Mother of God Orthodox Church.” http://www.doxacon.org/ ~~What is real and what is fiction?

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 68^th Annual Conference on Magnetism and Magnetic Materials (10/30-11/5, Dallas, TX) ...fundamentals, experiments, theory and applications of magnetism... https://www.clocate.com/conference-on-magnetism-and-magnetic-materials-mmm/15697/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Singapore → Sing Opera

What do you get when you cross a writer with a deadline? A really clean house. / "It ain't whatcha write, it's the way atcha write it." – Jack Kerouac ~~Here is Bananarama with a cover of the Ella Fitzgerald hit T'aint What Ya Do which is what Kerouac is parodying. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CfIhNYcyllA

..........The people stop and star but nobody seems to care.........James Taylor …..Gorilla

^^^^^ There is no major difference between a stout and a porter. In fact, a stout is just a stronger porter.

Dad Joke of the Week: I'm going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. I'll call it my oughtabiography.

Quote of the Week: Replacing one dick with a different kind of dick isn't going to change anything in the House. We're one DNA test from the Jerry Springer show. --John Fetterman

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: They cut down all the trees and they blame the cows for farting. --Submitted by MMS

Today's Shame of History, November 3, 1979: Five members of the Workers Viewpoint Organization (later the Communist Workers Party) which had organized a "Death to the Klan" rally, were murdered and ten others injured when the rally was attacked by 40 Ku Klux Klan members and Nazis in Greensboro, NC. The political organization had been joined in the march by a group of local African-American mill workers. At the time of the shootings, not one police officer was present.

What has 12 writers, 20 actors, and 3 plots? The Hallmark Channel. / ”I think all writing is a disease. You can’t stop it.” – William Carlos Williams

..........Show them the way that you feel.........James Taylor …..Shower The People

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, 2023, pEnned ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: The attempt to force human beings to despise themselves is what I call hell. --Andre Malraux

Cost of War:

As of 11/02/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $220,579,942,870.

As of 10/26/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $220,020,324,025.

As of 11/02/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,175,206,568,792.

As of 10/26/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,173,643,110,784.

As of 11/02/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,151,302,513,530

As of 10/26/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,150,694,594,457.

As of 11/02/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $3,333,627,875,498.

As of 10/26/23 Veterans Care since 2001:$3,321,777,673,678.

As of 11/02/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,051,971,811,456.

As of 10/26/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,050,784,815,242.

As of 11/02/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,932,692,370,868.

As of 10/26/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $,8,916,922,057,435.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

A great democracy does not make it harder to vote than to buy an assault weapon. --Bill Clinton

Famous Last Words: —and the Military Scene to him will be closed forever. Washington's Farewell Address to the Troops

..........There's always a shade of a doubt.........James Taylor …..Her Town Too

I am a writer. My pen name is Bic. / Writing is easy. All you have to do is cross out the wrong words. --Mark Twain

May Peace guide your pen

And Joy infuse your ink

prairie mama

christine

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