eLite ePistle

 Famous First Words: AFTER an unequivocal experience of the inefficiency of the subsisting federal government... Alexander Hamilton From the first Federalist Letter printed

The time has come to laugh at the problem. Death and taxes are both bad, but at least the Republicans don't meet every year to keep the rich away from Death. / Last year my sister ran for Congress as a MAGA Republican. This year she doesn't do anything because she got elected.

..........And the day yet to begin.........U2 …..Hawkmoon 269

No man is above the law and no man is below it; nor do we ask any man's permission when we ask him to obey it. --Theodore Roosevelt

It is a windy Friday morning. The 46°F is made colder by a 15 mph north northwest wind. It blows the willow branches nearly horizontally against a sky colored gray with a thick layer of cloud. Whole branches of the willow are bare and the mulberry is following suit. Fall has arrived in full armor. Birds fly by my window; they fly quickly as if to finish their business and get home before the wind takes them off course. They make no sound, but a distant dog barks at some unseen source of irritation. Puck sleeps on his pillow, unawares. I too am inside and protected from the weather. Sweet, creamy half-decaf for a bracer and dog snores for company. I select a cone of autumn pine incense and set it in its burner to watch the smoke curl down and black ceramic fountain and fill the room with the smell of the outdoors I can see. But it cannot touch me. A quiet morning here at the end of the week to soothe away the rough spots and let me write to you.

Have a bright and cheerful weekend, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm into writing short fiction, to-do lists mostly. --Emma Willmann

The Republican dining room is serving stuffed ballots as this year's election day special. / Scorsese is making a bio flick of George Santos. The tagline is “Based on a false story”.

..........One man betrayed with a kiss..........U2 …..Pride (In the name of love)

Trivia Questions: Corruptioneer of the Week – Boss Tweed (a Democrat)

^ What was Boss Tweed's actual name?
^^ Would you care to estimate a dollar amount that was stolen by Boss Tweed and friends?
^^^ Why and/or how did Boss Tweed become a lawyer?
^^^^ What contributed to his reputation as a “man of excess”?
^^^^^ What finally brought Boss Tweed down?

Big Hello: Mbote – Lingala (Congo) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's insane that a penguin wrote all those classics.

Image of the Week: This is the right front fender of the car I was driving when a lady backed her SUV out of her driveway and into me. I'm fine – the airbag didn't deploy. The lady driving and her baby are both fine and her car was hardly scratched.

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: For every library rule there is an equal and opposite library rule. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

MAGAs can find an excuse for getting out of anything except political office. / Matt Gaetz holds the record for the most congressional nicknames: Gaetz of Wrath (Colbert), Tweaker of the the House (Kimmel), Hates' Gaetz, Sneaker of the Louse (Burch) and on and on

..........See the flames higher and higher.........U2 …..Bullet The Blue Sky

Moonbeam: Nothing is less important than which fork you use. --Emily Post

Question of the Week: What do you think about, when you think about thinking? Quora

Puzzle of the Week: From Mike Reiss, who's been a showrunner, writer, and producer for "The Simpsons" among other things. Name a famous athlete, first and last names. Interchange the initials of those names. Then add an appliance. The result, reading left to right, will name a fruit. What was it?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It was the best of times; it was the worst of times. --Dickens Nice. --Schrödinger --Submitted by ma of va

If you're not part of the solution, then you're probably a Republican running for president. / Little known fact, the chicken crossed the road to get away from Matt Gaetz.

..........Felt the healing in her fingertips.........U2 & New Voices Of Freedom …..I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For

^ Few men are as synonymous with political corruption as William Magear Tweed—“Boss Tweed,” as most knew him. The “Grand Sachem” of New York City’s Democratic political machine, Tammany Hall.

Almanac: It is Friday, October 27, 2023. The moon will be full (Beaver aka Frost Moon) tomorrow (10/28) and is in Aries. The United Nations has declared this World Day for Audiovisual Heritage (UNESCO). It is Black Cat Day, Cranky Co-workers Day, and Navy Day. Because it is the last Friday in October it is also Frankenstein Friday, International Bandanna Day, and Francis E Willard Day, aka Temperance Day.

Among those born on this day were James Cook (1728), Niccolo Paganini (1782), Issac Merrit Singer (1811), Klas Arnoldson (1844), Theodore Roosevelt (1858), Emily Post (1872), Jack Carson (1910), Dylan Thomas (1914), Nanette Fabray (1920), Roy Lichtenstein (1923), Ruby Dee (1923), John Cleese (1929), Sylvia Plath (1932), Terry J Hart (1946), and Marla Maples (1963).

On October twenty-seventh the US Navy was established (1775), the first Federalist letter appeared in a NY newspaper (1787), the first Macy store opened (NYC, 1858), the US annexed west Florida from Spain (1810), Boss Tweed was arrested for corruption (1871), Night on Bald Mountain debuted (1886), Variety first used the word jazz in print (1916), the world's first subway opened (NYC, 1904), water skis were patented (1925), DuPont introduced "nylon" (1938), You Bet Your Life premiered on radio (1947), B O Davis, Jr became the first black USAF general (1954), the American Basketball League began play (1961), Nader's Raiders formed (1969), Begin & Sadat won the Nobel Peace prize (1978), and U2 opened their Rattle and Hum tour in Ireland (1988).

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Wilbur, Wilbur, Wake Up

This Week: Saturday, October 28 – Champagne Day & National First Responders Day & Make A Difference Day

Night Sky, 10/28: A very slight partial lunar eclipse occurs while the Moon is visible from Europe, Africa, and Asia. The partial eclipse will be deepest at 20:14 Universal Time October 28, when just 13% of the Moon's diameter will be shaded in the umbra of Earth's shadow. The entire partial eclipse runs from 19:34 to 20:54 UT. Slight penumbral shading will be visible on the Moon's celestial southeast to south side for roughly 45 minutes before and after partial eclipse. http ://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Sunday, October 29 – National Cat Day & Snowmobile Day & World Stroke Day

Monday, October 30 – Create A Great Funeral Day & National Candy Corn Day & Devil's Night aka Mischief Night

Tuesday, October 31 – Magic Day & National UNICEF Day & Samhain

Wednesday, November 1 – All Saints Day & Cinnamon Day & Hockey Mask Day

Night Sky, 11/1: The Summer Triangle Effect. Here it is nearly the end of October, but Deneb still shines near the zenith as the stars come out. And brighter Vega is still not far from the zenith, toward the west. And the third star of the "Summer" Triangle, Altair, remains very high in the southwest. They seem to have been there for a couple months! Why have they stalled out? What you're seeing is the result of sunset and darkness arriving earlier and earlier during autumn. Which means if you go out and starwatch soon after dark, you're looking earlier and earlier by the clock. This counteracts the seasonal westward turning of the constellations.

Thursday, November 2 – All Souls Day & National Men Make Dinner Day & Stout Day

The true winner of the Republican primary is NASA's DART spacecraft. It's traveling away from Earth at an enviable four miles per second until it crashes blissfully into a comet. / I'm thrilled to be joined on the Science Committee by my Republican colleague Dr George Santos, winner of not only the Nobel Prize, but also the top prize in Mathematics, the Fields Medal, for his groundbreaking work in imaginary numbers.

..........As the music played, I saw my life turn around.........U2 and BB King …..When Love Came To Town

^^ Tweed and his cronies stole somewhere between $30 million and $200 million from the city ($614 million to more than $4 billion in 2020 dollars) while in control of New York's political machine. During his glory days, Tweed was the third-largest landowner in New York City, with a mansion on Fifth Avenue and 43rd Street (with a horse stable nearby), a Greenwich estate, and two yachts.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm going to retire someday and live off my savings. I don't know what I'm gonna do on the next day.

Moonbeam: An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do. --Dylan Thomas

Video of the Week: Sylvia Plath reading her poem “Daddy” which is actually, fairly Halloween-ish. Long Address (3:43)

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: Jim Jordan failing to get the vote...couldn't happen to a better guy. --Faith Salie ... During the first vote which Jordan failed to win, a group of elementary school students were up in the gallery having to watch this. And one kid was heard to shout, "This is the worst field trip ever". Absolutely true. Even better, that kid got more votes than Jim Jordan to be Speaker of the House. --Peter Sagal Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 10/21/23

People ask the difference between a leader and a boss. The leader leads and the boss drives. --Theodore Roosevelt

Remember when Halloween was the scariest night of the year? Now, it's Election Night. / Jim Jordan, known as King of the Congressional Morons (Vanity Fair), was considered the best man for the Speaker ship because he's “not as bad as the pedophile”.

..........The temperature is rising.........U2 …..Silver and Gold

^^^ Despite never studying as an attorney, Tweed was certified as a lawyer by his friend George Barnard. Opening a law office, he was then able to charge exorbitant fees to individuals and companies seeking his influence, under the catchall phrase “legal services.”

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Home is where you trust the toilet seat. --London Rose

Weird Word of the Week: Gossypiboma – a surgical sponge that has been left in a patient after an operation. https://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-gos1.htm

Dragon of the Week: The elusive Republican Dragon

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Stop flea beetles that spread viruses from infecting your cabbage patch. Make hoop supports by cutting Hula Hoops in half and inserting the legs firmly into the soil. Cover with a canopy made from sheets of Bubble Wrap and secure to the hoops with Scotch Packaging Tape, making sure the sheets of Bubble Wrap are high enough not to touch the plant. You can also secure the Bubble Wrap by staking the ends to the ground with wire. At the end of the season, roll up the Bubble Wrap to be used again the following year. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/bubblewrap.html

Of course the Republicans say, “Don't steal, Don't lie, Don't cheat.”. They hate competition. / Did you see the picture of Marjorie Taylor Greene's Thanksgiving turkey? It was so white and unseasoned that it tried to overthrow the government”. --Brian Floyd

...........Freeway like a river cuts through this land.........U2 …..Heartland

^^^^ Tweed’s most famous accessory may be the huge 10.5-carat diamond stickpin he wore on his shirt front. The gifts one of his daughters received on her wedding day were reported to be worth $14 million in today’s money. He also feasted on duck, oysters, and tenderloin at the famous Delmonico's restaurant, and his significant waistline certainly didn't hide his love of excess. Despite his numerous other vices, Tweed didn’t smoke and barely drank—though he kept plenty of cigars and whiskey on hand for any visiting friends.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Another beautiful day without using sin cos or tan --Submitted by FNOG ~~Or Oxford commas.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: MileHiCon (27-29, Denver, CO) For SF/F and speculative fiction lovers, it’s a weekend not to be missed. https://www.upcomingcons.com/upcomingcons/40980-MileHiCon

Actual Science Conference of the Week: Stochastics and Statistics Seminar: Consensus Based Sampling (27, Cambridge, MA) We propose a novel method for sampling and optimization tasks based on a stochastic interacting particle system. https://stat.mit.edu/calendar/hoffmann/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Dan Marino --> Mandarin orange

MAGA wants to make sure that the National Security Administration is the only government office that actually listens to you. / Josh Hawley begs the question: Is it a crime to cry and run away from the mob. --Trevor Noah

..........There's too much confusion now.........U2 …..All Along The Watchtower

^^^^^ Tweed made plenty of enemies, but perhaps his toughest was Harper’s Weekly political cartoonist Thomas Nast. The German immigrant vividly conveyed the city’s corruption with images of a bloated Tweed, replacing his head with a bag of money in one famous depiction, and using the snarling visual of a tiger (from Tweed’s own Engine No. 6 mascot) to represent the predatory Tammany Hall. Tweed recognized the power and danger that Nast’s widely seen illustrations presented: "My constituents don't know how to read, but they can't help seeing them damned pictures!" As he did with so many others, Tweed attempted to pay for Nast’s acquiescence, sending a crony (pretending to a representative for a European benefactor interested in studying art) to the illustrator’s house with a promise of $500,000—if he would just move to Europe for the foreseeable future. But Nast refused to be bribed, and the attempt only fueled his critical cartoons, which inflamed public outrage about Tweed's acts.

Day of the Week: Black Cat Day … What do people in England call little black cats? Kittens. Beware of the night, child. All cats are black in the dark. --Jean Genet

Observation of the Week: I don't think that the House Republicans are stupid or foolish or unable to govern. I think it was, is, and will be their plan to make the government unable to function. I do not think this was always the policy of the party, but it seems to be the policy now.

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you're having a bad day, just remember that the airport in Salzburg Austria has a counter for people who flew to Austria instead of Australia. --Submitted by sb of ar

Today's Peace of History: , October 27, 1967: Phillip Berrigan, artist Tom Lewis, poet David Eberhardt, and United Church of Christ minister James Mengel, members of the Baltimore Interfaith Peace Mission, entered the draft board at the United States Customs House and poured duck’s blood on several hundred draft records

MAGA candidates are confused by dragged out vote counts. They want to know the results months in advance. / Seriously, if we thought Beavis and Butt-Head were going to run for Congress when they grew up, we'd have done something.

..........And all the riches in the night.........U2 …..All I Want Is You

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, 2023, eLite ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Life is a terminal disease, and it is sexually transmitted. --John Cleese

Cost of War:

As of 10/26/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $220,020,324,025.
As of 10/19/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $219,481,717,556.
As of 10/26/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,173,643,110,784.
As of 10/19/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,172,138,673,505.
As of 10/26/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,150,694,594,457.
As of 10/19/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,150,109,419,105.
As of 10/26/23 Veterans Care since 2001:$3,321,777,673,678.
As of 10/19/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $3,210,372,897,466.
As of 10/26/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,050,784,815,242.
As of 10/19/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,049,642,476,484.
As of 10/26/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $,8,916,922,057,435.
As of 10/19/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,901,747,117,920.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. --Theodore Roosevelt

Famous Last Words: Thank you very much. --Richard Nixon's Farewell Address

..........The future is here at last.........U2 …..Love Rescue Me

How many Republicans does it take to change a light bulb? Two, one to change the bulb and another to change it back. / You could go to the middle of the phone book and pick any of the hundreds of Mike Johnsons — each one would be a better choice for speaker, because not one of them tried to overthrow the presidential election in the House he now represents.— JIMMY KIMMEL

May Peace guide your ballot
And Joy inform your vote
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh: Butt-Head and Beavis & Matt Gaetz and Jim Jordan