Famous First Words: AN ACT To authorize the Secretary of the Interior to issue certificates of citizenship to Indians... Indian Citizenship Act of 1924
June is World Roller Coaster Appreciation Month! Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert were riding a roller coaster at Disney World. Lauren turned to Marjorie and asked, “If we turn upside down, will we fall out?” Marjorie replied, “Of course note, We'll always be friends”. / What type of roller coaster goes through the Bronx? The type where people scream in the flat parts. --Jerry Seinfeld
..........Step, kick, kick, leap, kick, touch...Again..........Chorus …..I Hope I Get It (A Chorus Line)
Separate waiting rooms, separate ticket windows, separate cars, nothing to eat at any lunch counter. Refused admission to churches, cemeteries and even parks. Parks and cemeteries are placarded “Negroes and dogs not admitted.” The effect of such proscription is most baneful as well as inconvenient. --Rev D A Graham from a sermon delivered on June 2, 1899 in Indianapolis
It is a cloudy, humid (65%) Friday morning. Warmth (77°F) makes the day muggy so that the world feels and kind of smells tropical. The sky is a calm azure with puffs and puffs strewn across it. There is a light breeze that keeps the willow dancing and the mulberry in motion but hardly moves the clouds. Now and again the sun peeks out from behind the clouds and brightens the day with direct light. Birds have finished their morning song and have moved on to other tasks; from time to time they zip silently by the window. The only sound is the hum of my computer...no birds, no dogs, no car motors. Puck is asleep on his pillow and refuses even to nod a “happy birthday” to Jeff (who's turning 42 today). I bring my coffee cup to my face and breathe in the steam. The aroma clears the nostrils and reminds me of that tart taste coming to my tongue. Ahh, good morning.
Hope your weekend shines like the sun, ePistliers
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm thrilled to announce that nothing is going on with me. --the New Yorker
You would think that the fastest ride at the park is the roller coaster, but really the carousel has all the horse power. / Anxiety is like a roller coaster...think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think think AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
..........Acting more like children than children.........Barbra Streisand …..People (Funny Girl)
Trivia Questions: Well a big Happy Birthday to Henry VIII !
- ^ How many and which of his wives did Henry divorce?
- ^^ How many and which of his wives did Henry have beheaded?
- ^^^ Which marriage lasted the longest?
- ^^^^ Which was the shortest?
- ^^^^^ Which wife survived Henry?
Big Hello: Chôm rab suôr – Khmer (Cambodia) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Don't judge a book by its movie. --Submitted by Heinlein Society
Image of the Week: As the sun rises in the morning I see this image on the side of the storage shed.
Fake Library Statistics of the Week: Life plus 70 is not only the length of copyright but how long a librarian must work to retire wealthy. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
June is National Zoo and Aquarium Month: Beware the octopus, she's always well armed. / I'd make another fish joke, but I'm trying to scale back.
..........Some people take me for a fool..........Roger Williams …..'Cause I Believe in Loving (Bananas)
Moonbeam: In order to know virtue, we must first acquaint ourselves with vice. --Marquis de Sade
Question of the Week: Why are clowns scary?
Puzzle of the Week: From Mike Reiss, who's a writer/producer for "The Simpsons." Name a place in Europe in nine letters. Swap the third and fourth letters, then the eighth and ninth letters. The result is two words describing what this place famously does. NPR Sunday Puzzle 5/28/23
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Bigfoot saw me once, but nobody believes him. --Submitted by rc of ks
The alpha monkey on monkey island is always angry. In fact, they named Furious George. / Ah, that new zookeeper fed the polar bears ice berg-ers.
..........Makes me feel sad for the rest.........Carly Simon …..Nobody Does It Better (The Spy Who Loved Me)
^ Henry divorced 2: Catherine of Aragon and Anne of Cleves.
Almanac: It is Friday, June 2, 2023. The moon will be full (Strawberry) tomorrow (6/3) and is in Scorpio. It is Leave the Office Early Day, National Bubba Day, National Gun Violence Awareness Day, and Yell "Fudge" at the Cobras in North America Day. Because it is the first Friday in June it is also Doughnut Day which is also known as Donut Day.
Among those born on this day were Henry VIII (1491), Marquis de Sade (1740), St. Pius X (1835), Thomas Hardy (1840), Edward Elgar (1857), Hedda Hopper (1890), Michael Todd (1901), Johnny Weissmuller (1904), Sally Kellerman (1936), Constantine II (1940), Charlie Watts (1941), Stacy Keach (1941), Marvin Hamlisch (1944), Jerry Mathers (1948), and Dana Carvey (1955).
On June second Rome was sacked by Vandals (455), the fifth national black convention opened (NYC, 1835), Maine passed the first alcohol prohibition law (1851), Gibbs patented the chain-stitch single-thread sewing machine (1857), the comet Donati was recorded as being first seen (1858), in San Francisco ground was broken for the first cable railroad (1873), the "El" opened in Chicago (1883), Grover Cleveland married Frances Folsom (1886), the US observed a day of fasting to protest lynchings (1899), the US granted citizenship to Native Americans (1924), Lou Gehrig began his 2,130 consecutive game streak (1925), and Queen Elizabeth II was crowned (1953).
Night Sky, 6/2: After dark Mars shines inside the Beehive cluster, M44, near the central beehive-shaped asterism itself (which is currently tilted right). Use binocs or, better, a telescope. Mars is moving east across the cluster at about 90 arc-seconds per hour. Can you see its position change with respect to the stars in as little as a half hour. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Fraternal Picture of the Week: A philosophical discussion on the sharing of donuts.
This Week: Saturday, June 3 – National Black Bear Day & National Play Outside Day & National Prairie Day
Sunday, June 4 – National Animal Rights Day & National Punk Day & National Trails Day
Night Sky, 6/4: Vega is the brightest star in the east-northeast after dark. Look 14° (about a fist and a half at arm's length) to Vega's upper left for Eltanin, the 2nd-magnitude nose of Draco the Dragon. Closer above and upper left of Eltanin are the three fainter stars forming the rest of Draco's stick-figure head, also called the Lozenge; the faintest of them is 4th magnitude. Draco always points his nose to Vega.
Monday, June 5 – Festival of Popular Delusions & Hot Air Balloon Day & National Moonshine Day & World Environment Day
Tuesday, June 6 – Theists Pride Day & Drive-in Movie Day & Yo-yo Day
Wednesday, June 7 – Bartender Day & World Caring Day & Boone Day
Night Sky, 6/7: Venus (magnitude –4.4, in Gemini) is the brilliant "Evening Star" in the west-northwest from twilight into late evening. It still shines high in the dusk, and it doesn't set until about 2 hours after dark.
Thursday, June 8 – Ghostbusters Day & National Best Friends Day & Upsy Daisy Day
June is National Rivers Month. Hipster Harry refused to swim in the river because it was too mainstream. / I went to the tv channel that said, “Live Stream”, but it was showing a parade, not a river.
..........One thrilling combination.........Chorus …..One (A Chorus Line)
^^ Henry beheaded 2 wives: Anne Boleyn (witchcraft, treason, and plotting assassination) and Kathryn Howard (infidelity)
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I love little cultural differences, like how Americans are super offended by the word cunt but here in Australia we're super offended by school children being slaughtered with automatic weapons. --Submitted by bh of ks
Moonbeam: The main object of religion is not to get a man into heaven, but to get heaven into him. --Thomas Hardy
Video of the Week: Dana Carvey as the Church Lady in Church Chat 11/15/86 (3:16) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=599687227320541
Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: The next company to change their name? After much public demand, Starbucks is officially changing its name to Public Restroom. -Hari Kondabolu Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 5/27/23
The greatest affliction we have to suffer is the lack of trial by jury when accused of crime. Lynching of Negroes is growing to be a Southern pastime. When reproved for their barbarity they say, “The only way to stop lynching is to stop the crime which leads to lynching.” --Rev Graham ~~Today this task falls to the police who shoot black people dead for allegedly stealing a pack of cigarettes which must be a “lynching crime”.
Don't swim in the rivers of Paris; that would be In Seine. / Those little streams that run off the river in Cairo are called JuveNiles.
..........Brighter than a lucky penny.........Leslie Gore …..Sunshine, Lollipops and Rainbows
^^^ Henry VIIIs longest marriage was to Katherine of Aragon, daughter of King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain. Eight years before her marriage to Henry in 1509, Katherine was married to Henry's elder brother, Arthur, who died of sickness at just 15 years old.
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Do you think I reference dinosaurs too much when I write?” I asked. She was silent, like the p in pterodactyl, but it said everything. --The English Teacher's Daughter
About the Font of the Week: I used to send out the ePistle in Times New Roman font. It's a good font, a workhorse of fonts, steady and faithful. Ah, but I wanted more...more excitement, more pizzazz. So I decided to change fonts. But I was told that the Comic Sans (used the last week or two) was hard to read on the phone. One person mentioned it and when I asked at Scrabble Monday, others agreed. I never read anything on my phone if I can help it because it is so small. So this font is Bahnschrift, ”a brand new digitization of the famous DIN 1451 character design standard”, in case you were wondering. I like its clean lines (and lack of pizzazz). It has been phone tested and approved.
Weird Word of the Week: Obnixely – earnestly, strenuously https://www.wordnik.com/words/obnixely
Dragon of the Week: Yuan Dynasty (1279-1368) Porcelain Dragon
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Line the inside of the crisper drawers. A sheet of Bounty Paper Towels not only absorbs moisture, keeping fruit and vegetables fresh longer, but the towels make the drawers easy to clean. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/bounty.html
June is Student Safety Month. In the US Student Safety itself is a joke. / The best part about summer vacation is three months with no school shootings..
...........My head says go and find the door..........Robert Klein …..Fallin' (They're Playing Our Song)
^^^^ Anne of Cleves' innocence and Henry's impatience, combined with his apparently intermittent impotence, meant the marriage was not consummated. Henry persisted for four nights before blaming Anne's unattractive physical appearance for his failure to 'do his duty'. The marriage was annulled after six months.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I heard Mars has no atmosphere. Could we create an atmosphere by dimming the lights and playing smooth jazz?
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: ConQuest 54 (2-4, Kansas City) The ConQuesT Dealers Room is a treasure trove of science fiction and fantasy merchandise! Open the general public, and shoppers don’t need a con badge. https://conquestkc.org/event/conquest-54/
Actual Science Conference of the Week: International Conference on NanoScience and Nanotechnology (1-2, Salalah, Oman) https://10times.com/ic-n-salalah
Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Stromboli (the volcanic island off the coast of Sicily) → Storm and oil
In Texas the legislation is considering a bill that will automatically tattoo a bullseye on their back. / People in the US do make jokes about school shootings but we can't hear them over the gunfire.
..........But don't the public have a right to know.........Chorus …..Dirt (Sweet Smell of Success)
^^^^^ Catherine Parr was Queen of England and Ireland as the last of the six wives of King Henry VIII from their marriage on 12 July 1543 until Henry's death on 28 January 1547. Catherine was the final queen consort of the House of Tudor, and outlived Henry by a year and eight months
Quote of the Week: I want to see the writers strike because the writers, god bless them, are the only true commies we have in Hollywood. --Ned Beatty
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Sometimes you just need to throw I in the cauldron and watch it burn. --Submitted by STC (Stirring the Cauldron)
Today's Peace of History, June 2, 1952: The U.S. Supreme court ruled President Truman's order two months earlier for the Army to seize the nation's steel mills in order to avert a strike during the Korean war as illegal.
June is International Surf Music Month: When The Beach Boys came on, the barber ran. / There should be more Beach Boy jokes...wouldn't it be nice.
..........Scattered pictures of the smiles we left behind.........Barbra Streisand …..The Way We Were (The Way We Were)
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle June 2, 2023, mIsc ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.
Moonbeam: Nobody is interested in sweetness and light. --Hedda hopper
Cost of War:
- As of 06/01/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $208,335,999,478.
- As of 05/25/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $207,790,249,357.
- As of 06/01/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,141,007,553,704.
- As of 05/25/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,139,483,258,671.
- As of 06/01/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,138,002,972,671.
- As of 05/25/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,137,410,215,336.
- As of 06/01/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $3,074,391,867,827.
- As of 05/25/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $3,062,838,123,356.
- As of 06/01/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,026,085,916,236.
- As of 05/25/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,024,848,655,576.
- As of 06/01/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,587,747,945,225.
- As of 05/25/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,572,372,374,138.
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
Many innocent men are thus hanged or burned alive just because American prejudice refuses them a trial by their peers. --Rev Graham
Famous Last Words: The things which I have here before promised, I will perform and keep. So help be God. --Oath of Elizabeth II at her coronation
..........And I want to remember.........Melissa Manchester …..Through The Eyes Of Love (Ice Castles) --all of today's songs were in my Marvin Hamlisch
June is Dairy Month: Farmer Fanny had a big herd of small cows that produced condensed milk. / Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn't find a cow tall enough for a shower.
May Peace warm your heart
And Joy cool your jets
prairie mama
christine
Last Laugh:
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