Famous First Words: I ask you to share with me today the majesty of this moment... Richard Nixon 1969 Inauguration Speech
Welcome to Sugar Awareness Week (16-29). You have to put just the right amount of sugar in the mix to make a Danish pastry, otherwise it would be sweetish. / I can use either hand to put sugar in my tea. I'm ambidextrose.
..........Blues how do you do.........Leadbelly …..Good Morning Blues
To listen well is as powerful a means of communication and influence as to talk well. --John Marshall
It is a cold, clear Friday morning. Our temperature has already moved from 30 to 32°F, the sky is pale blue with large fluffy white clouds. The rising sun brings out color from the houses and the cars as it climbs the eastern heavens. Very little breeze moves the branches of the willow. I hear the call of a crow but do not see any in flight. In fact not even small, neighborhood birds are out and about yet. Sunlight dims and brightens as the clouds move slowly to the southeast. It makes the house behind us glow a beige-ish yellow for a while and then dim to a pale peach. A trash truck grinding gears and dumping barrels travels down the block and back up the other side. Puck is sleeping on his pillow. His freshly shampooed fur fluffed around him like a halo. I light a stick of rose incense and raise a cup of Nuttin But Kisses to you, ePistlier. Have a great day.
Hope your weekend makes you laugh, ePistliers.
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: How young can you be and still die of old age? --Submitted by rc of kc
I'm easing into my new diet slowly. I've started by blowing the sugar off my doughnuts. / I visited the doctor today and she said my sugar was too high. So I've moved it to the bottom shelf.
..........Don't try to find you no home in Washington, DC.........Leadbelly …..Bourgeois Blues
Trivia Questions: Happy Penguin Awareness Day
- ^ What is the group term for a flock of penguins?
- ^^ Penguins come in a lot of sizes, what are the upper and lower weight limits?
- ^^^ How long do penguins live?
- ^^^^ How many species of penguins are there?
- ^^^^^ What is the name of the black and white “tuxedo” look donned by species called?
Big Hello: Haluu – Inupiaq (Alaska) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Sign at the KU vs K-State game: Our Johnson is bigger than your Dick.
Image of the Week:
Fake Library Statistics of the Week: 72% of librarians have an archenemy. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
A young man once told Bernard Shaw that he had done research and found that the word sugar was the only one in the English language where the su was pronounced sh. Shaw replied, “Sure”.
..........They're mixing everything up with whiskey and wine.........Leadbelly …..Red Cross Store Blues
Moonbeam: I see dance being used as communication between body and soul, to express what is too deep to find for words. --Ruth St Denis
Meditation of the Week: Is there something that underlies the ever-changing appearances of things, something that does not change (which is the essence of reality)? ~~Thought to be the very earliest philosophical question.
Puzzle of the Week: Name a famous living person — first and last names. If you drop the last letter of the first name, you get an element on the periodic table. And if you drop the last letter of the last name, you get the chemical symbol of another element. What celebrity is this? --NPR Sunday Puzzle 1/15/23
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: This Valentine's Day conversation hearts will be back with their classic flavors: Wild Clayberry, Tropical Drywall, Chalk Lovers, Plaster Surprise, and Attic Citrus. --Submitted by INRITH
A lion trainer had the cats under such control, they could take a lump of sugar from her lips on command. A young man in the back row yelled, “I can do that”. So the trainer asked him to try. The man replied, “Certainly, but first,k get those lions out of there.” / I knew a man who pretended to be rich in order to attract women. He wasn't a sugar daddy; he was an artificial sweetener.
..........Just about a mile from Texarkana.........Leadbelly …..Cotton Fields
^ A group of penguins in the water is called a raft but on land they're called a waddle.
Almanac: It is Friday, January 20, 2023. The moon will be new tomorrow and is in Capricorn. It is Camcorder Day, Data Innovation Day, National Cheese Lovers Day. Penguin Awareness Day, National Disc Jockey Day, and Women's Healthy Weight Day,. Because it is the third Friday it is also International Fetish Day and Florida : Arbor Day.
Among those born on this day were Johann Schein (1586), Francesco Conti (1681), Richard H Lee (1732), Andre-Marie Ampere (1775), Sebastian de Iraadier (1809), Charles A. Ellwood (1873), Ruth St Denis (1877), A P Merritt (1884), Leadbelly (1889), George Burns (1896), Federico Fellini (1920), Ray Anthony (1922), Patricia Neal (1926), Martin Landau (1928), Arte Johnson (1929), and David Lynch (1946).
On January twentieth the first English Parliament was called into session (1265), Peace of Knärod signed (Denmark & Sweden, 1619), John Marshall became chief justice (1801), the British took Hong Kong from China (1841), Elizabeth Stanton became the first women to testify before congress (1869), the California Stock Exchange Board was organized (1872), Lone Ranger premiered on radio (1930), Meet the Beatles was released in the US (1964), Richard Nixon was inaugurated (1969), Ronald Regan inaugurated (1981), and Bill Clinton was inaugurated (1993).
Night Sky, 1/20: Sirius twinkles brightly after dinnertime below Orion in the southeast. Around 8 or 9 p.m., depending on your location, Sirius shines precisely below fiery Betelgeuse in Orion's shoulder. How accurately can you time this event for your location, perhaps judging against the vertical edge of a building? Of the two, Sirius leads early in the evening. Betelgeuse leads later. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Fraternal Picture of the Week: Couch Cuddle with Mom
Extra Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I've found that if you tuck one part of your pant legs into your sock, people expect less of you. --Submitted by INRITH
This Week: Saturday, January 21 – National Hugging Day & International Sweatpants Day & National Hug Your Puppy Day
Sunday, January 22 – Answer Your Cat's Questions Day & China New Year & Roe vs Wade Day
Night Sky, 1/22: Zero-magnitude Capella high overhead, and equally bright Rigel in Orion's foot, have almost the same right ascension. This means they cross your sky’s meridian at almost exactly the same time: around 9 or 10 pm. now, depending on how far east or west you live in your time zone. So, whenever Capella passes its very highest, Rigel always marks true south over your landscape, and vice versa.
Monday, January 23 – Maternal Health Awareness Day & National Pie Day & National Handwriting Day
Tuesday, January 24 – Belly Laugh Day & National Compliment Day & National Peanut Butter Day
Wednesday, January 25 – A Room Of One's Own Day & Opposite Day & Robert Burns Day
Night Sky, 1/25: Mars, in Taurus, shines very high in the east-southeast at dusk and near the zenith as you face south by 8 or 9 pm. Mars continues to fade slowly, from magnitude –0.8 to – 0.6 this week, as it shrinks from 13 to 12 arc seconds wide. Mars-colored Aldebaran, mag +0.8, is 8° or 9° below it.
Thursday, January 26 – Clashing Clothes Day & National Peanut Brittle Day & Toad Hollow Day of Encouragement
Donald and Melania Trump are actually a very sweet couple. He's her sugar daddy and she's his arm candy. / I too had a sugar daddy. My father's blood glucose level ran 300 points.
..........Me and my wife we pick a bail a day.........Leadbelly …..Pick A Bail Of Cotton
^^ Penguins weigh anywhere from 2 lbs to 80 lbs.
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What's the difference between an airplane and the United States? The plane's right wing isn't trying to crash it out of spite. --Submitted by 98%
Moonbeam: To say that a bad government must be established for fear of anarchy is really saying that we should kill ourselves for fear of dying. --Richard Henry Lee
Video of the Week:Leadbelly singing Where Did You Sleep Last Night https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsfcUZBMSSg
Not So Late Night Snack of the Week: (George Santos) He looks like Marco Rubio's Clark Kent. --Emmy Blotnick Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 1/14/23
When a law is in its nature a contract, when absolute rights have vested under that contract, a repeal of the law cannot divest those rights. --John Marshall
A man orders coffee with no cream and no sugar. After a few minutes the waitress comes back and says, “We're out of sugar, can you take it with no Stevia?”
..........Stay there by your fireside bright.........Leadbelly …..Good Night (Irene)
^^^ Penguins live 15 to 20 years.
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I don't remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I'm sure it wasn't an anxiety ridden, people hating, sarcastic bitch with a meme problem. --Submitted by NS
Weird Word of the Week: Cacoethes – Irresistible urge to do something inadvisable. (16th Century) https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/caco%C3%ABthes
Dragon of the Week: Mario the Magnificent – mascot for Drexel University, Philadelphia, PA
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Prevent ski goggles from fogging up. Spray with Barbasol shaving cream, then wipe clean. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/barbasol.html
Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake. / I had a boyfriend who used to put sugar on his pillow so he'd have sweet dreams.
...........Yonder comes little Rosie, how in the world do you know.........Leadbelly …..Midnight Special
^^^^ There are 18 species of penguin.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Writers: We are all apprentices in a craft where on one ever becomes a master. --Ernest Hemingway
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: OhayoCon (20-22, Columbus, OH) This year's theme is Adventures in Anime. https://ohayocon.org/news/
Actual Science Conference of the Week: National Future of Education Technology Conference (23-25, New Orleans) ...the most dynamic and innovative education leaders and professionals from around the world for an intensive, highly collaborative exploration of new technologies, best practices and pressing issues. https://www.fetc.org/
Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Tina Fey → Tin Fe
Today I was so bored that I put a bit of sugar right in front of an ant. The ant spent some time eating the sugar and then left to call her friends over. I cleaned it up so they would think she was lying. / Excuse me, ”Is this sugar free?” Cashier: “No, you have to pay for it.”
..........In the pines, in the pines, where the sun don't ever shine.........Leadbelly …..Where Did You Sleep Last Night
^^^^^ Countershading, or Thayer's law, is a method of camouflage in which an animal's coloration is darker on the top or upper side and lighter on the underside of the body.
My Own Writing of the Week: I am so sorry that I feel I need to include this. I have been so disappointed so often by those good Catholic boys. So what is it that the church does to them? The only one I've known who has a really healthy sexual outlook is gay.
Wait, that isn't fair. Let's assume that some of the men I've loved were raised Catholic, worked it out, and the subject never came up. I certainly never asked after a lover's theology before or after screwing them. It wouldn't have been on my radar normally. But with a fair few Catholics, it seemed to come up.
When we were all still hardly more than children, it was kind of fun; they were naive and rebellious but with a slight lean towards kinkiness. As I got a little older and put a little wisdom on me, it was harder to know just where that malleability came from. It came to feel like a power trip.
But the grownup men I encounter often tend to be less willing to experiment; they hold their asses a little bit tighter than their protestant/atheist counterparts. They appear to be afraid of something. Sometimes, they seem to be afraid of everything. The fear of nudity is the strangest of all. Does the church teach them that clothes protect them from demons, sin, fun? How is it related to the phenomenon of the Mormon's religiously defensive underwear? Yarmulkes? Burqas? Can tattoos protect you?
Worst of all, the subject of their religion comes up. Otherwise how would I know? I don't ask people about their religious affiliations; I really don't care. In most cases I don't want to know. They bring it up one way or another. Sometimes it arises from some other normal conversation. I dated a couple of Jews and knew they were Jews, but the subject never came up. Atheists never bring it up unless someone is pushing them hard. Protestants are all over the map.
From Always Surrender by Christine Smith
Quote of the Week: Somewhere in the world there is a tree that sprouted the same day you were born and has been growing along with you and I think that's wonderful. --zzcapss
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm surprised every night at midnight when I learn it's only 9:30. --Submitted by jm of ks
Today's Peace of History, January 20, 1869: Elizabeth Cady Stanton became the first woman to testify before congress. She spoke about women’s rights and suffrage. Though she had been an abolitionist she, along with her college friend, Susan B. Anthony, were opposed to the 14th and 15th Amendments to the United States Constitution because they gave rights to African American men that were not given to women of all races.
My friend worked at a sugar refinery until his position was dissolved. / I wanted to be a sugar daddy, but I ended up as a Splenda Stepfather.
..........If you want to ride you gotta ride it like you find it.........Leadbelly …..Rock Island Line
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle January 20, 2023, Sweet ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.
Moonbeam: True greatness is when your name is like ampere, watt, and fourier – when it's spelled with a lowercase letter. --André Marie Ampère
Cost of War:
- As of 01/19/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $197,785,748,198.
- As of 01/12/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $197,221,758,355.
- As of 01/19/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,111,539,655,570.
- As of 01/12/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,109,964,295,056.
- As of 01/19/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,126,543,313,270.
- As of 01/12/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,125,930,592,205.
- As of 01/19/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $2,851,020,283,222.
- As of 01/12/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $2,839,076,176,014.
- As of 01/19/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,003,632,514,651.
- As of 01/12/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,002,436,021,612.
- As of 01/19/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,290,526,577,522.
- As of 01/12/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,274,630,653,106.
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
The Constitution is colorblind, and neither knows nor tolerates classes among citizens.
Famous Last Words: and thank you. --Ronald Reagan Inaugural Address 1981
..........Tell him I'm gone.........Leadbelly …..Take This Hammer
I made an apple tart, but it wasn't sweet enough. Apparently, I don't know how to calculate pie. / The doctor said my sugar was much too high, so I took the blunt away from her.
May Peace enhance your life
And Joy sweeten your world
prairie mama
christine
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