Famous First Words: Well, here we are. --Chorus Anouilh's Antigone
Happy Birthday, Facebook! Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in the cafeteria at a mental hospital.
Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi ~~Math puns submitted by mja of ks
..........I know there's nothing to say........Fleetwood Mac …..Second Hand News
The ultimate test of a moral society is the kind of world that it leaves to its children. --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
After 2 years of distancing, 2 shots, 1 booster, and masks of gazillion designs, COVID has come to our household. It began last Sunday with my son – coughing all night, sore throat, achy. Now Jeff and I have it too. My throat is so sore I can't even swallow my own spit. I don't cough so much, but when I do it hurts down in my throat and lungs. It hasn't hurt that way since I gave up smoking (23 years, come April). I don't know if I'm achy because I'm 77 and parts of my body ache now and again for no apparent reason – so achy could mean anything. But by doing all the things we were supposed to, none of us are hospital cases, none of us are dying. We just feel lousy. Dashiell is over his already and going back to work today. So I should be alright by next week. Love you all.
Hope your weekend goes viral, ePistliers
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The world is not full of assholes, but they are strategically placed so that you'll come across one every day. Every. Day –Submitted by cf of ks
I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid crap people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.
1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope
..........Made me see where I've been.......Fleetwood Mac …..Never Going Back Again
Trivia Questions: Happy Bubble Gum Day
^ How much bubble gum is chewed each year worldwide?
^^ What is the largest bubble ever blown?
^^^ What was the original name for commercial bubble gum?
^^^^ How many sticks of bubble gum does the average US citizen chew in a year?
^^^^^ How do you get a busted bubble out of your hair?
Big Hello: Tierva – Inari Saami (Finland) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Nominate Anita Hill. That would be fun.
Max Picture of the Week: Max: Coldplay
Fake Library Statistics of the Week: 98% of librarians always judge a book by its cover. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
I wonder what Facebook employees do to waste their time at work?
Shortest distance between to jokes = a straight line
..........In the stillness of remembering what you had.......Fleetwood Mac …..Dreams
Moonbeam: You must never be fearful about what you are doing when it is right. --Rosa Parks
Meditation of the Week: If you could bring back any canceled TV show, which one would it be?
Puzzle of the Week: From Ray Hamill of Madison, Wis.: What two world capitals can be found by rearranging the letters in the phrase "serial number"? --NPR Sunday Puzzle 11/27/10
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: “History will judge them” isn't exactly a super compelling argument when they're making it illegal to teach history. --Santiago Mayer
Week of the Week: Publicity for Profit Week (2-8) --As the Kardashians celebrate their 20th and final season, I congratulate myself for never watching a single episode.
Facebook is like a fridge. Even when u know there's nothing new going on, u still go on & check it every 10 minute.
Half a large intestine – 1 semicolon
..........You'll see things in a different way.......Fleetwood Mac …..Don't Stop
^ 100,000 tons of bubble gum is chewed every year around the world.
Almanac: It is Friday, February 4, 2022. The moon was new on Tuesday and is in Aries. It is Facebook's Birthday, International Day of Human Fraternity, Liberace Day, Medjoola Date Day, National Hemp Day, Quacker Day, USO Day, and World Cancer Day. Because it is also the first Friday it is Bubble Gum Day, Give Kids A Smile Day, Wear Red Day, and Working Naked Day.
Among those born on this day were Mark Hopkins (1802), Georg Henkel (1805), Clement Ader (1841), Jean Aicard (1848), Paul Althaus (1888), Charles Lindbergh (1902), Eddie Foy, Fr (1905), Dietrich Bonhoeffer (1906), Rosa Lee Parks (1913) Ida Lupino (1914), Betty Friedan (1921), Russell Hoban (1925), Florence Gordon (1944), Dan Quayle (1947), Alice Cooper (Vincent Furnier, 1948), and Clint Black (1962).
On February fourth Tycho Brahe met Johannes Kepler for the first time (1600), Shay's Rebellion failed (1787), the first electoral college chose Washington (1789), French National Convention abolished slavery (1794), Goodrich introduced rubber galoshes (1824), the Mormons left Nauvoo, MO (1846), the first US telegraph company was established (Maryland, 1947), Synge's Well of Saints opened (Dublin, 1904), the National Institute of Arts & Letters was founded (1913), Our Town opened on Broadway (1938), Brecht's Der Gute Mensch Von Sezuan premiered (Zurich, 1943), Anouilh's Antigone premiered (Paris, 1944), Sri Lanka gained independence (1948), the portable, electric typewriter was patented (1957), and Arafat become chair of PLO (1969),
Night Sky, 2/4 The solar system has four terrestrial (rocky) planets: Mercury, Venus, Earth, and Mars. Three are currently visible at dawn. The fourth is also visible under your feet. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Image of the Week: Christine and Kirsten at a February Sisters press conference in 1972
This Week: Saturday, February 5 – National Ice Cream for Breakfast Day & Shower With A Friend Day
Sunday, February 6 – Canadian Maple Syrup Day & Play Monopoly Day
Night Sky, 2/6: Jupiter (magnitude –2.0, in Aquarius) still shines brightly in the southwest at dusk, a little lower every day' but Saturn is out of sight in conjunction with the Sun
Monday, February 7 – Ballet Day & Man Day & Who Shall I Be Day
Tuesday, February 8 – Extraterrestrial Culture Day & Opera Day & Laugh And Get Rich Day
Wednesday, February 9 – National Pizza Day & Read in the Bathtub Day
Night Sky, 2/9: Uranus (magnitude 5.7, in Aries) is very high in the south-southwest after dark. Neptune (magnitude 7.9, in Aquarius) is getting low in the west-southwest after dark, invisible to the unaided eye some 15° upper left of Jupiter.
Thursday, February 10 – National Giving Hearts Day & World Pulses Day
Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account.
Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour - knotfurlong
..........Tell me why everything turned around.......Fleetwood Mac …..Go Your Own Way
^^ According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the largest bubble blown measured 12 inches in diameter.
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Deep within the heart of every evangelist lies the wreck of a car salesman. --H L Menchen
Moonbeam: No woman gets an orgasm from shining the kitchen floor. --Betty Friedan
Strange Fact of the Week: I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower.
Video of the Week: The most exciting 13 Seconds in a Chiefs game ~~In Typical football fashion this clip 13 seconds takes 3 minutes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymmGVyhnlao
Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: The New York Times has declared it the golden age of full frontal nudity for men. She may be an old gray lady, but she's not dead; am I right, guys. --Negin Farsad Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 1/29/22 ~~My movie star crush, Viggo Mortenson, has been doing full frontal for 20 years. In at least 3 films he goes full frontal (Eastern Promises, Indian Runner, Captain Fantastic) and bare back in at least 4 more.
We are not to simply bandage the wounds of victims beneath the wheels of injustice, we are to drive a spoke into the wheel itself. Dietrich Bonhoeffer
In spite of Zuckerberg's claims, recent studies show that Facebook likes don't cure cancer.
1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton
..........And I wish you all the love in the world.......Fleetwood Mac …..Songbird
^^^ The first bubble gum ever marketed was done so under the name Blibber-Blubber
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When a clown moves into a palace, he doesn't become a king. The palace becomes a circus. --Turkish Proverb --Submitted by ff of ks
Weird Word of the Week: Embuggerance – a natural or artificial hazard that complicates any proposed course of action. https://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-emb1.htm
Ollie's Very Own Picture of the Week: Ollie: Coldplay
ePistlier Response of the Week: I have been to Liechtenstein. I learned that one of their biggest money makers is postage stamps for stamp collectors. Didn't see much but farmland and a few homes in small cities, and lots of cows. I presume cheese is a favorite staple. There was a castle owned by some baron but it was off limits to visitors. --Submitted by jb of ks
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Deodorize a disposable diaper pail. Sprinkle liberally with Arm and Hammer Baking Soda. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/armhammer.html
The new toilet model will post the texture and weight of your shit automatically on Facebook and Twitter.
8 nickels – 2 paradigms
...........Sweet, wonderful you.......Fleetwood Mac …..You Make Loving Fun
^^^^ The average American chews around 300 sticks of gum a year.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Believe in yourself. If cauliflower can become pizza, you can do anything. --Submitted by cf of ks
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: CapriCon 2022 (3-6, Chicago) Rockin' in the Outer Realms https://capricon.org/
Vintage Players One Liner of the Week: I don't have ducks. I don't even have a row. I have squirrels and they are drunk.
Actual Science Conference of the Week: 2nd International Conference on Science, Engineering, Technology and tech business (2/4 Copenhagen) --We are delighted to once organize TESTACONF https://conferenceindex.org/event/2nd-international-conference-on-scienceengineeringtechnology-and-tech-business-2022-february-copenhagen-dk
Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Serial Number → Berlin and Maseru
When Facebook was down for several hours, productivity nationwide went up 240%
16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling
..........Honey, I just want to feel fine.......Fleetwood Mac …..I Don't Want To Know
^^^^^ If your popped bubble gets stuck in your hair, you can remove it by rubbing the piece stuck with peanut butter (what you're supposed to remove the peanut butter with is beyond me)
Fifty Years Ago Today of the Week: On the birthdays of my children I would say to them, “I know what I was doing x years ago today” and then I would tell them the story of their birth. ...until they got old enough to go outside before I could get very far. Well, I know what I was doing 50 years ago tonight (it was also a Friday). I occupied the East Asian Studies offices at the University of Kansas. There were 30 women and 3 children and 1 baby – that got sent home in the night, I don't know why. The offices were in a large, old Victorian home just east of the main campus. It was, apparently, the first time women in the US had occupied property in pursuit of their own rights. We made 6 demands on the administration: Affirmative Action (which the university had delayed setting up even though it was federally mandated), Free Daycare, Real Women's Health Care, A woman vice-chancellor, a woman's studies department, and civil service equity. I served on the second negotiating team that met with SENEX (Faculty Senate Executive Committee) in the middle of the night.
My Own Writing of the Week: SENEX members were already in session, waiting, so to speak. It was a paneled room with a large conference table running end wise from the entry door. The images are dark; I don't know if this is from the lighting in the room or from the flavor of the meeting. It struck me odd that neither the chancellor nor Max Lucas, president of Faculty Senate and chair of SenEx was seated at the head of the table directly across from the door. I sat just to the right of the door a couple of unremembered people away from Prof. Lucas. Chancellor Chalmers sat a little more than halfway down the other side. The sisters were grouped together at the end near the door. The members, all male, introduced themselves and we introduced ourselves using only our first names. There was some muttering about this but it was explained that they had certain power over our lives and we didn't want to help them exercise it unwisely.
Quote of the Week: I've done so many pelvic exams I feel like I work in a whore house. --Unnamed doctor in student health clinic University of Kansas , 1971.
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Bumper Sticker:Using your turn signal is not “giving information to the enemy”
Today's Peace of History, February 4, 1972: 30 women and 4 children occupied the East Asian Studies building on the campus of the University of Kansas. They peacefully and successfully protested against gender inequality on the KU campus. It was the first time in the US that women had occupied property in pursuit of women's rights.
I'm going to change my Facebook name to Benefits. Now, when someone adds me on Facebook, it will say: you are now friends with Benefits.
1,000,000 aches – 1 megahurtz
..........Take your silver spoon, dig your grave.......Fleetwood Mac …..Gold Dust Woman
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle February 4, 2022, Zuckerman's Famous ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047
Moonbeam: Aging is not “lost youth” but a new stage of opportunity and strength. --Betty Friedan
Cost of War:
As of 2/3/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,944,687,151,122.
As of 1/20/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,943,459,646,812.
As of 2/3/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,095,351,926,319.
As of 1/27/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,095,723,197,960.
As of 2/3/21 State Department War on Terror Costs since 2001: $169990173072444.
As of 1/27/21 State Department War on Terror Costs since 2001: $169,411,937,124.
As of 2/3/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,033,904,853,221.
As of 1/27/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,032,288,421,518.
As of 12/3/21 Veterans Care since 2001: 2,262,525,144,208 .
As of 1/27/21 Veterans Care since 2001: 2,250,270,493,668 .
As of 2/3/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $7,507,463,039,879.
As of 1/27/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $7,491,157,842,006.
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
Silence in the face of evil is itself evil. --Dietrich Bonhoeffer
Famous Last Words: Happy National Hemp Day! Hemp Day website
..........Listen to the wind blow, watch the sunrise.......Fleetwood Mac …..The Chain ~~All of today's song are from the album Rumours
2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
I'm developing a separate social network for people who can't spell and have no knowledge of grammar. I'll call is FASEBUK.
May Peace fill your timeline
And Joy be your friend
prairie mama
christine
Last Laugh:
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