Grilled ePistle

 Famous First Words: Wiegenlied Guten Abend Lullaby Johannes Brahms

May is National Barbecue Month. Nobody throws a BBQ as good as me. My record is 21 feet. / You know that mouth-watering sensation you get when you're grilling steak on the BBQ? Ever wonder if vegans get that when they mow the lawn?

..........desperately remained at home..........Janis Ian …..At Seventeen

He who stops being better stops being good. --Oliver Cromwell

It is a beautiful Friday morning. The sun adorns a cloudy sky crowded with fluffy white clouds against an azure blue background. A breeze gently coaxes the tree branches into motion for an early morning ballet. The 59°F temperature is welcoming and friendly. Birds are chirping, motors are revving, and a lawn mower in the distance is working. In my own backyard there are birds flitting about looking for heaven knows what. The world smells of new growth and spring. I am sitting at my desk watching through the window; a squirrel is running across the fence, then up the tree and gone from sight. I am sipping Mother's Day Coffee (An unnamed blend described as dark chocolate nutty and bold – seems pretty accurate – the I received for Mother's Day) and watching the wildlife romp around my patio. What a gorgeous morning.

Hope your weekend is spicy and delicious, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What do you mean masks aren't effective? I haven't been told to smile by a man in over a year. --Submitted by ab of kc

What's better than a vegan BBQ? Literally anything. / I went to a vegan BBQ last week. I thought the Vegan was overcooked.

..........Let me tell you a story..........Janis Ian …..Lover's Lullaby

Trivia Questions: Happy Mother's Day !

^ What is the oldest recorded Mother festival?

^^ Any idea who held the first Mother's Day celebrations in the US.

^^^ When or why did Mother's Day become an “official” day?

^^^^ Know when Canada celebrates Mother's Day?

^^^^^ About what percentage of mother's are expected to receive jewelry as a gift this Mother's Day?

Big Hello: Sho'daache – Crow https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: We've waited 20 years to see a Cheney punished for lying and instead we get a Cheney punished for not lying. --John Fugelsang

Max Picture of the Week: A boy and his cast in the tunnel.

Fake Library Statistic of the Week: 99.9% of books about Time Management are returned late. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

My librarian friend's favorite thing to bring to a BBQ is shush kebabs. / My Italian neighbor had to give up BBQ because the spaghetti kept falling through the grill.

..........Nothing is forever young – I'm not done..........Janis Ian …..This Train Still Runs

Moonbeam: Grow old with me, the best is yet to be. --Robert Browning

Meditation Seed of the Week: Are eyebrows considered facial hair?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The Wizard of Oz. (8-10 pm, TCM) –Transported to a surreal landscape, a young girl kills the first person she meets and then teams up with three strangers to kill again. --Submitted by HPF

Week of the Week: It's National Tourism Week (2-7): Scientists have opened a dimensional rift in one of NYC's most popular tourist spots. They call it Time Squared / A tourist on the London Underground asked how he could get to Heathrow via Barking. So I pointed at a map and woofed.

I went to a vegetarian BBQ. They smoked weed. / You can always tell if the BBQ was smoked with dogwood; just check the bark.

..........Preachers of equality, think they believe it..........Janis Ian …..Society's Child

^ The earliest Mother's Day celebrations can be traced back to the spring celebrations of ancient Greece in honor of Rhea, the Mother of God.

Almanac: It is Friday, May 7, 2021. The moon will be new next Monday and moves from Pisces to Aries today. It is Beaufort Scale (Wind) Day, Cosmopolitan Day (the drink), Cystinosis Awareness Day, National Barrier Awareness Day, and Worldwide Day of Genital Autonomy. Because it is the first Friday it is International Space Day, School Lunch Hero Day, and Tuba Day. And because it is the Friday before Mother's Day it is also Child Care Provider Day, Military Spouse Appreciation Day, National Public Gardens Day, and National Child Care Provider Appreciation Day.

Among those born on this day were Robert Browning (18121), Varina Howell Davis (1826), Johannes Brahms (1833), Peter Illyich Tchaikovsky (1840), Rabindranath Tagore (1861), Gabby Hayes (George, 1885), Archibald MacLeish (1892), Josip Broz Tito (1892), Cary Cooper (1901), Eva Perón (Evita Duarte, 1919), Darren McGavin (1922), Anne Baxter (1923), Gene Wolfe (Rodman, 1931), Johnny Unitas (1933), Willard Scott (1934), John Heard (1944), Janis Ian (1950), and Traci Lords (1968).

On May seventh Joan of Arc broke the English siege of Orléans (1429), the Congress of Cologne formed (Netherlands, 1579), the Theatre Royal opened (Drury Lane, 1663), William Penn began monthly meetings with negroes advocating emancipation (1700), the first Inaugural Ball was held (NYC, 1789 ~~It was held one week after the inauguration itself), the Indiana Territory was organized (1800), Beethoven's 9th premiered (1824), Greece became an independent republic (1832), the American Medical Association was organized (1847), black citizens staged ride-ins to protest segregation (New Orleans, 1867), the plan for the Pulitzer Prizes was approved (1912), the US Congress established Mother's Day (1914), Glenn Wright made an unassisted triple play (Pirates, 1925), Glenn Miller recorded Chattanooga Choo Choo (1941), the West Europe Union was established (1955), and the US nuked Christmas Island (atmospheric test, 1962).

Night Sky, 5/7: Summer is still seven weeks away, but the Summer Triangle is beginning to make its appearance in the east, one star after another. The first in view is bright Vega. It's already visible low in the northeast as twilight fades. Next up is Deneb, lower left of Vega by a little more than two fists at arm's length. Deneb takes about an hour to appear after Vega does, depending on your latitude. The third corner of the triangle is Altair, which shows up far to their lower right by midnight. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Son of Meditation Seed of the Week: Why is it that suddenly everything is lavender scented. Soap, shampoo, men's deodorant Did Bulgaria have a bumper year?

Image of the Week: This is a picture of my mother, I do not know when or where it was taken.

This Week: Saturday, May 8 – American Indian Day & Mother Ocean Day & National Archery Day

Sunday, May 9 - Mother's Day & Rural Life Sunday (aka Rogation Sunday)

This is the weekend of the O Henry Pun-Off in Austin, Texas

Monday, May 10 – Clean Your Room Day & National Hamster Day & National Golf Day

Night Sky, 5/10: The moon will be new at 6:59 pm and will be in Taurus.

Tuesday, May 11 – Eat What You Want Day & National Foam Rolling Day & Root Canal Appreciation Day

Wednesday, May 12 – Eid-Al-Fitr & International Nurses Day & Limerick Day

Night Sky, 5/12: Tonight the Moon and Venus stand in conjunction (5:03 pm CDT)

Thursday, May 13 – Eid-Al-Fitr & Frog Jumping Day & Hummus Day

The BBQ pun is a meataphor. / American BBQ is very good, but Korean BBQ has more Seoul.

..........Anonymous, autonomous..........Janis Ian …..Fly Too High

^^ Early "Mother's Day" in the US was mostly recognized by women's peace groups. An early activity was the meeting of groups of mothers whose sons had served or died on opposite sides of the American Civil War. There were local celebrations in the 1870s and the 1880s, but nothing to speak of on a state or national basis. In 1868 Ann Jarvis created a committee to establish a "Mother's Friendship Day" whose purpose was "to reunite families that had been divided during the Civil War", and she wanted to expand it into an annual memorial for mothers, but she died in 1905 before the celebration became popular.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I like when people who think the 50s were the good old days call you a communist for endorsing economic policies Eisenhower used to make the 50s the good old days. --John Fugelsang --Submitted by bd of ny

Moonbeam: There is no limit to stupidity. -Space itself is said to be bounded by its own curvature, but stupidity continues beyond infinity. --Gene Wolfe

Late Night Snacks of the Week: Honestly, in these divided times, it’s just great to see all Americans coming together to fail at something so easily achievable, Thanks to the many people who refuse to take a life-saving vaccine, experts now think that coronavirus is basically going to become one of those antivirus pop-ups, you know? We’re going to minimize it but we’ll never really delete it. --Trevor Noah / Giulani: I’m no legal expert, but I’m pretty sure attorney-client privilege goes away when you read the documents out loud on national television. It’s like the dumb, criminal version of your grandma reading you a funny meme she found on Facebook.--Seth Meyers / The Oscars: How can something so woke put so many people to sleep? --Jimmy Kimmel

Ollie's Very Own Picture of the Week: Mountain man Ollie and mom

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: "Citizen Kane" is no longer the greatest movie ever made. That title, according to the review aggregator site Rotten Tomatoes, is now bestowed on "Paddington 2." Film purists are upset. They say that since "Paddington 2" is, of course, a sequel, the fair comparison should be to "Citizen Kane 2: The Legend Of Rosebud's Gold" (ph). --Peter Sagal Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 5/1/21

The real strong have no need to prove it to the phonies. --Charles Manson

If Fred Durst opened a BBQ restaurant, would he call it Limp Brisket? / At the BBQ I was in charge of sides. I was going to bake potatoes but the plans got foiled.

..........Now am I humble, who once was proud..........Janis Ian …..Light a Light

^^^ In 1904 Frank E Hering of the Fraternal Order of Eagles, made the first recorded public plea for "a national day to honor mothers". It was not until 1914 that President Woodrow Wilson signed the orders that made Mother's Day a national holiday in the United States, due largely to the continued efforts of Anna Jarvis (daughter of Ann Jarvis). She asked that white carnations be the official mother's day symbol.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Maybe I'm happy but asymptomatic. --Submitted by MMS

Weird Word of the Week: Ishkabibble – Dismissive slang expression. It looks and sounds Yiddish (nish gefidlt, nicht gefiedelt) World Wide Words: Ishkabibble

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Laminate recipe cards. Spray with Alberto VO5 hair spray to give the cards a protective gloss. Alberto VO5® Hair Spray: Wacky Uses

Puzzle of the Week: This challenge came from listener Peter Gordon of Great Neck, N.Y. Think of a person in the entertainment industry (5,4). The first name and last name each have at least two consonants and two vowels. All the consonants in each name come at the start, and all the vowels come at the end. The letter "y" is not used. Who is this famous person? --NPR Sunday Puzzle 5/1/21

My neighbor invited me for BBQ but it turned out to be a line of Barbie dolls. / I don't want to say my dad was a bad cook, but he used to ask, “how would you like your steak...overcooked, burned to a crisp, or completely incinerated”?

...........People lust for fame like athletes in a game..........Janis Ian …..Stars

^^^^ In Canada we celebrate Mothers Day on the same day as the United States, the second Sunday of every May.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When someone asks me if I'm seeing anyone, I automatically assume they're talking about a psychiatrist. --Submitted by INRITH

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: AtomaCon 2021 (7-9, North Charleston, SC) ...a multi-genre, panel driven convention AtomaCon

Actual Science Joke of the Week: International Conference on Space Operations (SpaceOps): 3-7, Cape Town, South Africa) -addressing state-of-the-art operation principles SpaceOps (May 2021), International Conference on Space Operations, Cape Town South Africa - Conference (10times.com)

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Chloe Zhao ~~I had never heard of her.

The secret to great BBQ is to have KC Masterpiece on speed dial. / My BBQ comes with a little kick, especially if you insult my cooking.

..........Wonderous things to see and be done..........Janis Ian …..Hair of Spun Gold

^^^^^ 36% of Americans plan to buy their mom jewelry. However, flowers still remain the most popular gift options with 69%.

Recreating Famous Movie Characters With Anything You Can Find of the Week:

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Rack Slabbath BBQ (A real rib house: Rack Slabbath BBQ - Barbecue, Catering, Caterer )

Today's Peace of History, May 7, 1984: American veterans of the Vietnam War reached a $180 million out-of-court settlement with 7 chemical companies in a class-action suit against the herbicide Agent Orange. ~~Apparently every person who had any contact with Agent Orange has diabetes.

We grill out so often, my husband's blood test came back: 60% propane and 20% BBQ sauce. / When we lived in Colorado we used to fire up the grill right after we shoveled a foot of snow off the deck.

..........Teach you how before we're done..........Janis Ian …..When The Party's Over

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle May 7, 2021, Grilled ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047

Moonbeam: What is more important to a library than anything else – than everything else – is the fact that it exists. --Archibald MacLeish

Cost of War:

As of 5/6/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,127,648,786,691.

As of 4/29/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,125,652,358,929.

As of 5/6/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,034,897,068,147

As of 4/29/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,033,540,501,779.

As of 5/6/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $850,670,729,706.

As of 4/29/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $848,965,283,317.

As of 5/6/21 Veterans Care since 2001: $348,970,547,946.

As of 4/29/21 Veterans Care since 2001: $348,583,036,396.

As of 5/6/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,362,188,765,083.

As of 4/29/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,356,742,156,094.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Even if a unity of faith is not possible, a unity of love is. --Hans Urs von Balthasar

Famous Last Words: Blow on the coal of the heart and we'll know...We'll know... Archibald MacLeish JB

..........Then we made our peace..........Janis Ian …..Water Colors

May you always be surrounded by good friends and better BBQ. / I installed a treadmill to the front of my BBQ grill. It's the most exercise I've gotten in years.

May Peace infuse your days

And Joy marinade your nights

prairie mama

christine

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