Famous First Words: I, Pigasus, hereby announce my candidacy for the Presidency of the United States. --Jerry Ruben, 1968 About Pigasus
Happy Senior Citizen's Day! I'm old enough to make my own decisions and too old to remember what I decided. / I just realized that I am only 3 months younger than Keith Richards.
..........And let me sing for ever more..........Count Basie …..Fly Me To The Moon
Do your little bit of good where you are; it is those little bits of good put all together that overwhelm the world. --Desmond Tutu
It is a beautiful Friday morning. The rising sun is filtered through a wrinkly, bubbly cloud that shades us as we sit waiting for people at our yard sale. 69°F is neither warm nor cool and allows enjoyment of the fresh air smelling of growth and summer. There is no breeze to move the willow branches. A soundless meadowlark flies to the neighbor's sunflower and stops at each flower before flitting across in street and into an oak tree. Puck sat with us until people showed up but he barked too much and had to be sent inside. At the moment there is no crowd and so I have sneaked away to write to you. So there is not only the joy of the writing but the joy of it being “on the sly”,
May you and your weekend be forever young, ePistliers.
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What's the difference between being assertive and being aggressive? Your gender --Submitted by ss of mo
You don't get smarter as you get older. There is just less stupid stuff left that you haven't already done. / It's Poets Day: Here are a few of the world's worst rhyming couplets. Slowly walking down the hall, Faster than a cannonball --Oasis Champagne Supernova
..........I may be wrong, but I won't be wrong always..........Count Basie …..Boogie Woogie
Trivia Questions: Happy Birthday, Hawaii
^ How many of the 8 major Hawaian islands can you name?
^^ Any idea what the state fish is?
^^^ Hawaii has 3 of the top 10 wettest places on earth. Can you name any?
^^^^ What do they call a Hula Dancing School?
^^^^^ Which island gets the most tourists?
Big Hello: Ola -Aragonese (Spain) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm thankful for the Foo Fighters because I've never felt threatened by a foo and that means they're doing a heck of a job on the front lines. --Submitted by INRITH
Fake Library Statistic of the Week: 70% of librarians totally did the whole "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" thing in high school except just stayed home to read. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
I know I've still got it but I have gotten a prescription to get rid of it. / Y'all enjoy those 20's, 30's, and 50's because in your 50's that check engine light is gonna come on.
..........the pretty little poppy..........Count Basie …..One O'clock Jump
Moonbeam: I have as much privacy as a goldfish in a bowl. --Princess Margaret
Naturally Occurring Mandala of the Week: Home grown tomato
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Science Fact: A dog gets more factual information from sniffing another dog's ass than a human does from watching Fox News. --Submitted by pl of hi
Week of the Week: National Chef's Appreciation Week (16-22) --Bakers do earn the majority of their income in the morning. They make most of their dough at yeast by a leaven o'clock.
I must have misheard. I thought they said “older and wiser” but all I got was “older and wider”. / World's worst rhyming couplets: War is stupid and people are stupid Culture Club The War Song
..........And soft summer nights..........Count Basie …..It Was A Very Good Year
^ 1) Hawai'i – the Big Island 2) Maui -Valley Island 3) Oahu -The Gathering Place 4) Kauai – The Garden Isle 5) Molokai – The Friendly Island 6) Lanai – Pineapple Isle 7) Nihau – The Forbidden Isle 8) Kahoolawe – The Target Isle
Almanac: It is Friday, August 21, 2020. The moon will be first quarter on Monday. and is in Libra. It is Men's Grooming Day, National Spumoni Day, Poet's Day, and Senior Citizen's Day. Hawaii celebrates Admission Day (1959).
Among those born on this day were Hubert Gautier (1660), Augustin-Louis (1789), Aubrey Beardsley (1872), Friz Freleng (1906), William "Count" Basie (1906), Nancy Kulp (1921), Chris Schenkel (1923), Priness Margaret (1930), Wilt Chamberlain (1936), Clarence Williams III (1939), Jackie DeShannon (1944), Kim Cattrall (1956), and Matthew Broderick (1962).
On August twenty-first Brahe took up astronomy (1560), Pueblos took Santa Fe from the Spanish (1831), Nat Turner revolted (1831), the venetian blind was patented (1858), the fourth Pan-African Congress met (NYC, 1927), the Dunbarton Oaks conference opened (1944), Hawaii became the 50th state (1959), Gemini 5 was launched (1965), the fateful Democratic Convention opened in Chicago (1968), and a total solar eclipse was visible in N. America (2017).
Night Sky,8/21: Spot the thin crescent Moon low in the west at twilight. Look to its left by about 16° for Spica twinkling into view. Spica, usually considered a star of spring, is heading down and out for the year. Much closer to the Moon (for the Americas) is fainter Gamma Virginis. They're just a degree or two apart as seen at the times of dusk for North America. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Max Picture of the Week: Max teaching Ollie about Brotherly Love ~~I think Ollie looks a little like Groot here.
This Week: Saturday, August 22 – Be An Angel Day & National Bring Your Cat To The Vet Day
Sunday, August 23 – Go Topless Day & Ride the Wind Day
Night Sky, 8/11: Late this evening Fomalhaut, the Autumn Star, makes its inevitable appearance above the southeast horizon. Its rising time will depend on where you live. But by 10 or 11 pm now, you should have no trouble identifying it low in the southeast if you have a good view in that direction. No other 1st-magnitude star is anywhere nearby.
Monday, August 24 – International Strange Music Day & Pluto Demoted Day & Wayzgoose Day
Tuesday, August 25 – Kiss and Make Up Day & National Park Service Day
Wednesday, August 26 – National Dog Day & National Toilet Paper Day
Night Sky, 8/25: Mercury is hidden in conjunction with the Sun. As dawn gets under way, Venus blazes brightly up in the east. You'll find Castor and Pollux off to its left and Orion farther to its right. The brightest star high upper left of Venus is Capella.
Thursday, August 27 – Just Because Day
I went to buy sexy underwear and they automatically gift wrapped it. --Joan Rivers / World's worst rhyming couplets: Can't complain, musn't grumble, help yourself to another apple crumble. ABC That Was Then But This Is Now
..........When you see me comin' raise your window high..........Count Basie …..Going To Chicago Blues
^^ The official Hawaii state fish is known as the Humuhumunukunukuapua`a, which is scientifically known as Rhinecanthus rectangulus. Other names for the fish include the reef triggerfish and the rectangular triggerfish. The fish was designated as the state fish on a five-year trial in 1985.
'Nother Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I caught my son chewing electrical cords. So I had to gorund him.. He's doing better currently, and now conducting himself properly -Submitted by fnog
Moonbeam: Nobody roots for Goliath. --Wilt Chamberlain
Late Night Snacks of the Week: Now he’s just a villain in a children’s book. Next, he’s gonna ban rollerskating and build a laser to blow up Halloween. --Stephen Colbert / Trump, meanwhile, attacked Harris for being “nasty” to supreme court justice Brett Kavanaugh during his heated confirmation hearings in fall of 2018. Trump sounds like he’s sniffling to his mom after getting home from the playground – ‘She was the meanest most horrible most disrespectful bully, she gave me a wedgie! --Seth Meyers / Of all people, Donald Trump should totally understand how you can be with a woman who’s publicly humiliated you. Honestly, it’s kind of cute watching Republicans flail around trying to figure out the right talking points. It’s like when a litter of puppies is born but they haven’t opened their eyes yet. --Trevor Noah
Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: Researchers have surveyed single people who were looking for a partner and found all of them have one thing in common as to what they want in a partner. None of them have any idea what they're actually looking for. There you go. Oh, they said they know. Everybody thinks they know if you ask them what they're looking for in a partner - somebody who's funny or is generous or has millions of dollars, a heart condition and no other heirs. But research has proved that all these people are wrong. Nobody knows what they want. In random tests, people ended up expressing attraction to people who had none of the things they had said they were attracted to with two significant exceptions - a nice butt and their own HBO password. --Peter Sagal The Best of Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me 8/15/20
We have a long way to go before we are able to hear the voices of everyone on earth, but I believe that providing voices and building bridges is essential for the World Peace we all wish for.
Getting Older feels like my warranty has expired and my parts are wearing out. / World's worst rhyming couplets. I'm sorry that I doubted you, I was so unfair. You were in a car crash, and you lost your hair. Beatles Don't Pass Me By
..........But you've had your first lesson..........Count Basie …..Learnin' The Blues
^^^ Ninth wettest -Kukui, Maui (9,293 mm), Eighth wettest – Mt Waialeale, Kuai (9,763 mm), Seventh wettest – Big Bog, Maui (10,272 mm)
Worthless Fact of the Week: There is an average of 50,000 spiders per acre in green areas. https://www.arcamax.com/knowledge/dailytrivia/s-1107545
Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Medical science has made such tremendous progress that there is hardly a healthy human left. --Aldous Huxley --Submitted by pl of hi
Anteprepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Dating 2013: Do I want to Netflix and chill with this person? Dating 2020: Do I want to witness the collapse of capitalism, fight the revolution next to, and go through the apocalypse with this person? --Elly Belle --Submitted by ae of mo
Weird Word of the Week: Informavore – a species that lives by processing and communicating information. http://www.worldwidewords.org/turnsofphrase/tp-inf3.htm
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Keep jewelry together. Organize rings, earrings, necklaces, and brooches in Ziploc Storage Bags. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/ziploc.html
Living to be 100 was easy. Thirty years ago I took out a restraining order against the Grim Reaper. / World's worst rhyming couplets: I'm serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a dancer. Snap Rhythm Is A Dancer
...........Holiday tables under the trees..........Count Basie …..April in Paris
^^^^ A hālau hula is a school or hall in which the Hawaiian dance form called hula is taught. .
Prepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: You cannot fill your classroom and syllabus with “the classics” and call your students “reluctant readers” at the same time. Representation matters. --Alyssa Gray-Tyghter ~~As the holder of a degree in literature, I really appreciate this quote.
Science Fiction Joke of the Week: Reading computer manuals without the hardware is as frustrating as reading sex manuals without the software. --Arthur C Clarke
Actual Science Joke of the Week: I love learning Quantum Computing, because half the time there is nothing to learn.
Mild Mannered Curse of the Week: May your spoon always slip and sink under the hot soup you eat.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It takes a village to raise a child but it takes a vineyard to home-school one. --Submitted by KS for a Safe Return to Campus
Age doesn't make you forgetful. Having way too many stupid things to remember makes you forgetful. / World's worst rhyming couplets: Then the sky filled with herons. I saw the devil in a Chrysler LeBaron. Kanye West Dark Fantasy
..........I am so awfully misunderstood..........Count Basie …..Lady Be Good
^^^^^ Oahu island generally receives about 49.6% of the tourists coming to Hawaii. In 1028 that was 4,919,725 people.
Month of the Week: August is National Traffic Awareness Month --Have you seen the movie Jim Carrey made during a traffic jam? It's called "Me, Myself, and I-85". / Why did the chicken cross the road? So she wouldn't get bocked in traffic.
Recreating Famous Painting With Anything You Can Find:
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's nice outside. I think I'll sit out on the patio. ...207 Mosquitoes just liked your post.
Today's Peace of History, August 21, 1976: Approximately 20,000 people, mainly women, from both Protestant and Catholic areas of Belfast, Northern Ireland, attended a Peace People's rally at Ormeau Park
There has been an uptick of people getting married in the 60s and 70s when they finally pay off their student loans. / World's worst rhyming couplets: I have played in every toilet, but you still want to spoil it. Muse Muscle Museum
..........Your hair has turned to silver..........Count Basie …..Down By The Old Mill Stream
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle August 21, 2020, Entropic ePistle. Grace, Gaiety, and Geriatrics. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047
Moonbeam: When an Englishman has professed his belief in the supremacy of Shakespeare amongst all poets, he feels himself excused from the general study of literature. He also feels himself excused from the particular study of Shakespeare. --Aubrey Breadsley
Cost of War:
As of 8/20/20 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,054,580,053,715.
As of 8/13/20 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,052,566,367,129.
As of 8/20/20 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $985,238,814,728.
As of 8/13/20 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $983,870,418,391.
As of 8/20/20 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $788,243,292,345.
As of 8/13/20 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $787,522,926,171.
As of 8/20/20 Veterans Care since 2001: $334,782,654,505.
As of 8/13/20 Veterans Care since 2001: $334,391,594,369.
As of 8/20/20 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,162,845,347,385.
As of 8/13/20 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,157,352,382,077.
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
“To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness”~ Robert Muller
Famous Last Words: Men pass away, but their deeds abide. --Augustin-Louis (his final words)
..........Trying to work out life's happy plan..........Count Basie …..I Want To Be Happy
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
May Peace be your boon
And Joy your companion
prairie mama
christine
Last Laugh:
No comments:
Post a Comment