Friday, September 20, 2019

Greenish ePistle


Famous First Words: It was four o'clock when the ceremony was over. Upton Sinclair The Jungle
It's National Indoor Plant Week (15-21). I tried talking to my plants. They listened to how my day went but when it was there turn all they did was narc on the cat.
..........Wonder if tomorrow will be like this today.........Nelson (Matthew & Gunnar) …..Love and Affection
We are men and women from many lands, representing a rich variety of cultures. And we have been brought together to work in a great common cause: the survival and progress of mankind. --Kurt Walkheim
It is a very pleasant (72°F) Friday morning. The sky is aswirl with clouds and jet trails below an azure sky. There is no breeze to make the tree limbs dance or tease the hair and lauds are sung by cicada with only a little bird song as counterpoint. We walk a ways and Puck barks at an imaginary squirrel in a tiny tree. I explain that tracker dogs are quiet so as not to scare away the prey, but he continues to bark and sniff...like a toy tracker. We return home and leave the front door open so we can enjoy the outdoors like a giant picture. The whole house smells of brewing coffee – two kinds, two machines. I doctor my decaf and sit at my computer staring out at the motionless green of the September day and think about you. It's a wonderful world.
Hope your weekend packs a punch, ePistliers, the thirst quenching version that is.
It is Global Climate Strike Day ! It has already begun in Australia... There are 3 rallies in Lawrence and 4 in KC. You can find a strike near you at: https://globalclimatestrike.net/
Sometimes I feel useless but then I remember I breathe out carbon dioxide for plants. / When she was 5 my daughter brought in some weed from the yard to protect it from frost. Last spring, she rented her first apartment and I gave her it to her as a house warming present. It's okay, I took it out of the coffee can and put it in a nice pot.
..........Looks like he set my natural soul free.........Jelly Roll Morton …..Mamie's Blues
Trivia Questions: Congratulations to Chester Arthur for becoming president 138 years ago today.
^ Who died and made Arthur president, anyway?
^^ Which number president was he?
^^^ Know anything about Mrs. Arthur?
^^^^ For what is the Arthur presidency known?
^^^^^ What changes did Arthur make to the white house?
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I've been diagnosed with a chronic fear of giants...Feefiphobia. --Submitted by ma of va
Adventure of the Week: Jeff got called into work today so I took him because the bus only runs once an hour. As I was getting into the car, a car across the street pulled out of the driveway and up the street. A woman was standing in her yard yelling into her phone. “He stole my son. Stop him”. Two neighbor ladies took video of the car as it drove away so that license plates were captured. One lady said he came out of the house calmly and strapped the baby into the car properly. When I got back from dropping off Jeff, two police cars were on the block and the women who had seen stuff and had video had already talked to them. Creepy. I think that the car was parked there when Puck and I took our walk around 7 – 7:30, 3 hours earlier. But it could have been a different car that was there. There are rarely 2 cars parked at that house so I noticed – but not what kind or the license number. I trust the baby is fine.
Fake Library Statistic of the Week: 75% of librarians brought a black cat to work today but not because it's Friday the 13th. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
I thought succulents were supposed to be the easy do-nothing plants that are impossible to kill; but these are WAY more difficult than all the beans I had to grow in school. / Houseplant Grave Stones: I didn't know you could kill a cactus.
..........Hold that tiger.........Jelly Roll Morton …..Tiger Rag
Moonbeam: The world at large does not judge us by who we are and what we know; it judges us by what we have. --Joyce Brothers
Naturally Occurring Mandala of the Week: Hen and chicks plant.

Big Hello: Gude – Tok Pisin (Papua New Guinea) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you really think the environment is less important than the economy, try holding your breath while you count your money. --Guy McPherson ~~FYI: This only works if you have some money.
And Then The Very Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.
Week of the Week: National Singles Week (15-21) –Stages of being single: 1) Loneliness 2) Realizing you can eat an entire jar of nutella in the kitchen, naked, without anybody judging you.
When the weather is nice put your mini jalapeno plant outside. Then you can eat sunlight. / I bought some lemon grass and grew it in nice large, low pot so the cat could eat it instead of my philodendron. Now the lemon grass is so tall I can't get to the two lower drawers of my cabinet and every philodendron leaf has tiny teeth marks.
..........Show us a good break, Jelly.........Jelly Roll Morton …..Kansas City Stomp
^ Chester Arthur became president after James Garfield died following an assassination attempt by a disgruntled job seeker. ~~The victim died but the assassination was only an attempt?????
Almanac: It is Friday, September 20, 2019. The moon will be last quarter tomorrow and is in Gemini. It is National Punch Day and National Tradesmen Day. In Laos it is Thanksgiving.
Among those born on this day were Upton Sinclair (1878), Jelly Roll Morton (1885), Red Auerbach (1917), Joyce Brothers (1928), John A Wismont (1941), Fran Drescher (1957), and Matthew and Gunnar Nelson (1967).
On September twentith Megellan started off to sail around the world (1519), the USS Constitution launched (Old Ironsides, 1797), the electric range was patented (1859), Chester A. Authur was sworn in as president (1881), the Equal Rights Party nominated women as candidates for both president and vice president (1888), James Meredith was kept from entering Ole Miss (1962), Billy Jean King beat Bobby Riggs (1973), NASA launched HEAO (1979), and the NFL players began a 57 day strike (1982).
Night Sky, 9/20 : These moonless evenings are a good time to bring out your binoculars and try for the unusually small, compact open cluster NGC 7160 in the rich center of Cepheus, now high in the north. Find NGC7160: https://in-the-sky.org/data/object.php?id=NGC7160 http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Max Picture of the Week: Max unwrapping year two.

Shameless Self Promotion of the Week: The book that Max is unwrapping is called A Year of Max. It is made up of the pictures of Max from the ePistle with their captions. My daughter, his grandmother, had the book made. I love it. I'm very flattered. Thank you, Kirsten.
Max Picture of the Week2: Max –actually celebrating

This Week: Saturday, September 21 – UN International Day of Peace &International Red Panda Day
Night Sky, 9/21: By the first sign of Sunday's dawn the Moon shines high in the southeast, now with Orion to its lower right and Gemini to its lower left. How often do you examine the Moon with your telescope when the Moon is its late-night waning phases? To most of us, the waxing Moon of evening is much more familiar — when lunar mountains and crater walls cast their shadows in the opposite direction.
Sunday, September 22 – Car Free Day & Dear Diary Day
Monday, September 23 – Family Day & Teal Talk Day
Night Sky, 9/23: Jupiter is the white dot in the ssw as twilight fades. Saturn is the steady yellow star in the south during and after dusk. Neptune is well up in the southeast by 10 pm.
Tuesday, September 24 – Bluebird of Happiness Day & Punctuation Day
Wednesday, September 25 – National Tune-Up Day
Thursday, September 26 – Johnny Appleseed Day & World Contraception Day
The cheerleaders grew a big pot of encourage mint in their locker room. / Houseplant Grave Stones: I thought plants liked sunlight.
..........I roam the streets like a tramp, feet in a cramp.........Jelly Roll Morton …..Sidewalk Blues
^^ Arthur was the 21st president.
'Nother Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Vegetarians live up to 9 years longer than meat-eaters. 9 horrible, worthless, baconless years.
Still 'Nother Funniest Thing I Read of the Week:Trump 2020 Yeah, 20 for Obstruction and 20 for Treason
Moonbeam: The best way to forget one's self is to look at the world with attention and love. --Red Auerbach
Late Night Snacks of the Week: Yes, I’m happy that the opioid companies will have to pay, but at the same time, they misled so many sick people about how addictive their drugs were. Purdue also lobbied to lift limits on how many opioids doctors could prescribe and made billions from the use of opioids spiraling into epidemic. Now, they just get to be like: uh, how about we give some of that money back and we call it even? I think that’s bullshit. It's like someone breaking into your home and saying, once you bust them, “Alright, you got me! How about I break you off $100 and we call it even?” --Trevor Noah / Another Trumpling bites the dumpling of dirt. Drumpf goes through staffers like a high 17-year-olds go through Little Debbie Swiss Rolls. --Stephen Colbert / You have to appreciate the irony of John Bolton being taken out by a pre-emptive strike. --Seth Meyers / Candidate Debates: A televised event that was in no way at all like a gameshow. This is democracy – it’s very serious. Now let’s put 45 seconds on the clock and go. --Jimmy Kimmel / Pence at Trump's Resort: Calm down everyone, it wasn’t a command. It was a suggestion – you know, like how waking up to a horse’s head in bed is a suggestion that you … find the rest of the horse, I guess? --Samantha Bee
Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: Either President Trump fired national security adviser John Bolton this week, or Bolton quit. They're each saying something different. And with these two, the only thing we can say is that whoever is telling the truth is doing it for the first time. The president hired Bolton 18 months ago, even though he disagreed with him on everything. Bolton's sole qualification was that the president saw him a lot when he turned on his TV. That is not a joke. That's why he got the job. It's also why the new national security adviser is mesothelioma. --Peter Sagal Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me 9/14/19
I am convinced that the United Nations provides the best road to the future for those who have confidence in our capacity to shape our own fate on this planet. --Kurt Waldheim
Katy knew her window box herb garden was fully grown; it was just thyme. / Houseplant Grave Stones: Fluffy Is Sorry
..........It brings back a memory ever green.........Jelly Roll Morton …..Dead Man Blues
^^^ In 1859, Arthur married Ellen “Nell” Lewis Herndon, the daughter of a naval officer. The couple had two children who survived to adulthood: Chester Arthur Jr and Ellen Herndon Arthur. Nell Arthur died of pneumonia at age 42, less than two years before her husband became president.
Worthless Fact of the Week: The Equal Rights Party ran Belva Ann Lockwood for president and Marietta Stow for vice president.
Wicked Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Being a Witch sounded fun, so I tried that for a spell. --Submitted by sd of co
Weird Word of the Week: Ishkabibble – dismissive slang expression like “who cares?” --the name of a character played by Merwyn Bogue on a 1930s radio show called Kay Kyser’s Kollege of Musical Knowledge http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-ish1.htm
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Remove burrs, tar, and sticky substances from a dog's hair. Saturate the area with Wesson Vegetable Oil. Wash with dog shampoo, rinse immediately, and brush clean. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/wesson.html
I think I'm just going to stay home with my plants and watch a movie – Netflix and dill. / My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. --Mitch Hedberg
...........You'll see pretty browns in beautiful gowns.........Jelly Roll Morton …..Beale Street Blues
^^^^ Moving past partisanship, Arthur signed the Pendleton Civil Service Act which among other things mandated that certain federal jobs be distributed on merit. He also vetoed the Chinese Exclusion Act (1882). AND He was nicknamed Gentleman Boss and Elegant Arthur because he owned 80 pairs of pants.
Grammar Joke of the Week: What's the difference between a kleptomaniac and a literalist? The literalist takes things literally. The kleptomaniac takes things, literally. --Submitted by pt of ks
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Reason why Halloween is the best holiday #4: Its the only day when its socially acceptable to go out in public dressed like a penguin.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of Last Week (which I left this field blank): Welcome to America, where we have higher standards for SNL cast members than for president.
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: ThunderCon 2019 (21/22, Thunder Bay , ON) –Come and “get your GEEK on” with all the rest of Thunder Bay's geeks, nerds and fans of all stripes. https://www.thundercon.org/
Actual Science Convention of the Week: 27th International Conference of Functional Food Center (20-21, Boston, MA) --Functional Foods and Bioactive Molecules: Their role in disease management and health promotion. https://conferencealerts.com/show-event?id=213110
Puck the Brave Episode of the Week: Here's our fearless Puck at yoga class during the case of the Bikram Bichon.

I tired to cheer up my houseplants but they really need a therapist to get to the root their their problems./ I can't mist my plants. The humidity makes my trichrome's hair frizz out and take over the whole window.
..........Jury found her guilty, she must go to jail.........Jelly Roll Morton …..The Murder Ballad
^^^^^ Before he moved into the White House, Chester Arthur hired designer and stained-glass artist Louis Comfort Tiffany to redecorate the state rooms. During the process, more than 20 wagonloads of furnishings from previous presidential administrations were cleared out and auctioned off.
Month of the Week: September is National Piano Month --That guy banging his head on the piano keys is my brother. He plays by ear. / The easiest way to play A-Flat Major on a piano is by dropping it on an army base.
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Truth in Bumper Stickers: Proud Parent of a Great Kid that is sometimes an Asshole and that's OK.
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week2: I keep hoping Trump will eat a Snickers and turn back into Obama. --Submitted by ss of ks
Capitalist Meme of the Week: I can't be ugly if beauty is a construct made by the capitalist system to make us see flaws that don't exist to sell us things we don't need.
Today's Peace of History, September 20, 1830: The National Negro Convention, a group of 38 free black Americans from eight states, met in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, with the express purpose of abolishing slavery and improving the social status of African Americans.
Gee Whiz, my cactus is such a smug, arrogant prick. / I never found talking to my plants very helpful until I started growing herbs. Now I get sage advice.
..........Oh, but Mississippi water taste like turpentine.........Jelly Roll Morton …..Michigan Water Blues
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle September 20, 2019, Greenish ePistle, Laughs, Love, and foliage. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047
Moonbeam: Fascism is capitalism plus murder. --Upton Sinclair
Cost of War:
As of 9/19/19 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,959,724,179,118.
As of 9/13/19 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,958,036,064,960.
As of 9/19/19 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $920,773,939,846.
As of 9/13/19 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $919,626,375,431.
As of 9/19/19 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $707,201,343,393.
As of 9/13/19 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $705,758,786,899.
As of 9/19/19 Veterans Care since 2001: $316,363,958,822.
As of 9/13/19 Veterans Care since 2001: $316,036,066,043.
As of 9/19/19 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,904,064,493,612.
As of 9/13/19 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,899,458,089,717.
It is ironic that the accumulation of arms is one of the few expanding industries in a period of economic depression and gloom. --Javier Pérez de Cuéllar
..........Understand, this is just the beginning.........Nelson (Matthew & Gunnar) …..Leave the Light on for Me
Purple clover is a real power plant. I planted one in my mix pot and everything grew better. / Carl made a decorative pot for his houseplants. It's name is “Succitumi baby”.
Famous Last Words: Let Us Vote Beside You. --Campaign poster for the Equal Rights Party, 1888
May Peace grace your window sill
And Joy bloom in your house
prairie mama
christine


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