Famous First
Words: The
day broke gray and dull. --Somerset
Maugham Of Human Bondage
As I am waiting
for WorldCon aka MidAmeriCon II to open
on Wednesday, I have found these jokes are about anticipation. Back
in the wild West, a stranger stands at a saloon bar. Suddenly a cowboy runs in
screaming, “Hey, everybody, Big Bad John is coming to town.” Several others
exclaim: “Big Bad John is the meanest, toughest, biggest outlaw in the West.
Let’s run for it.” Everyone heads for the door except the stranger and the
bartender. The bartender says, “Are you deaf, mister? Big Bad John is coming!”
The stranger replies, “I don’t know who he is, but he can’t be all that big and
bad. I’m not afraid.” So the stranger and the bartender wait. Soon the saloon
doors fly off their hinges, and a mountain of a man stomps through the door.
Covered with scars and sporting a scowl, he demands a drink. The bartender
meekly complies. The stranger nervously thinks to himself, “Now I wish I had
run away; this guy is the biggest, meanest-looking outlaw I’ve ever seen.” The
outlaw downs the drink in one gulp, slams it down on the bar, then turns and
looks the stranger coldly in the eye to announce, “I don’t know about you,
stranger, but I’m gettin’ outta here. I don’t wanna be here when Big Bad John
comes in!”
..........kissed
and caressed by the dew..........Buck Owens
.....Beautiful Morning Glory
Grace must
find expression in life, otherwise it is not grace. Karl Barth
Note: There will be no ePistle next week because I'll
be at MidAmeriCon II. See you on the
26th of August. ~~Look for pictures on
facebook.
It is a rainy Friday
morning. Puck and I, having forgone our
usual morning constitutional because of a heavy sprinkle, are in the backyard
between showers. The sky is a tatter of
clouds that proudly show their layers and tiers...dark and brooding, thin and
wispy, solid and gray. The temperature
at 73°F is very pleasant and the world smells of dampness - soil, foliage,
pavement. There is only distant motor
noises and still more distant birdsong.
The new fountain and bird spa has stopped gurgling, perhaps frightened
into silence by the early morning lightning.
Puck quickly covers the perimeter and takes a position on the landing
watching down over the yard and street.
Tree leaves and grass blades are sporting diamonds the size of raindrops.
We
linger, the dog and I, until a mourning dove hooooos at us and Puck become loudly suspicious of our jogging
neighbor, and then we come in to bitter and sweet decaf and thoughts of you.
Your weekend awaits,
ePistliers.
Walking up to a department store's fabric counter, the pretty
girl said, "I would like to buy this material for a new dress. How much
does it cost?" "Only one kiss per yard," replied the male clerk
with a smirk. "That's fine," said the girl. "I'll take ten
yards." With expectation and anticipation written all over his face, the
clerk quickly measured out the cloth, wrapped it up, then teasingly held it
out. The girl snapped up the package,
pointed to the old geezer standing beside her, and smiled, "Grandpa will
pay the bill."
Meanwhile I have the online program to whet my
appetite. https://midamericon2.org/online-program-schedule/ Lego Wizarding School (Friday 4 pm / Room 2214A/B)
Build the Wizarding
school of your imagination with LEGO.
..........Boil
a pot of coffee and bake a big fat hen.........Porter Wagoner .....Howdy, Neighbor, Howdy
Trivia Questions: An Olympic Quiz !
^ Any idea about when did
the original Greek Olympic games begin?
^^ How did the modern
Olympic Games begin?
^^^ What is the stated
purpose of the International Olympics Committee?
^^^^ When and/or where
were the first winter Olympics held?
^^^^^
How many countries are participating in this year's games?
Fake
Library Statistic of the Week:
70%
of librarians totally did the whole "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" thing
in high school except just stayed home to read.
https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
Sci Fi Con Joke of the Week:
Moonbeam:
A kitten is in the animal world what a rosebud is in the garden. --Robert Southey
My Mother taught me about Anticipation..."Just
wait until your father gets home."
All Things Armor (Friday, 11 am / Makers Area) ...cosplay, historical, fantasy,
high-tech--there are differences...
..........Hard-wearing
sole and heel.........Mark Knopfler
.....Quality Shoe
Something
to Think About of the Week: But
one of the biggest differences between walking and sitting meditation is that
it’s easier, for most people, to be more intensely and more easily aware of
their bodies while doing walking meditation, compared to sitting forms of
practice. When your body is in motion, it is generally easier to be aware of it
compared to when you are sitting still.
http://www.wildmind.org/walking/overview
Big Hello: Gamarjoba {
გამარჯობა} - Georgian
(Georgia)
Diversion I of
the Week:
Among the guests on panels with ordinary names like Defining Acceptable Risks
in Space Exploration is Jerry Pournelle.
And the Grand Master chat
(Thursday, 2 pm on the Tucker Stage) includes Robert Silverberg, Joe Haldeman,
Connie Willis, Larry Niven, and James Gunn.
You can't see, but my mouth is hanging open.
Week of the Week: National
Farmers' Market Week (August 7-13) --When the farmer died all his chickens were
taken to the farmer's market and sold to the highest bidder. They would have preferred to stay on the
farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
Quote of the
Week: I would
rather have questions that can't be answered than answers that can't be
questioned. --Richard Feynman
This is a wonderful time of year when the humans
decorate the home for us cats in anticipation of the visit from "Santa
Claws."
Writing Major Minor
Characters (Wednesday 4 pm / Room 2210)
...a character that is so wonderful you want to know everything about them...
..........And
I drank a fifth of courage and walked in.........Porter Wagoner .....Cold Hard Facts of Life
^ The ancient games were
held in honor of Zeus from c. 776 BCE until they were suppressed by
Christainification in 393 CE.
Almanac:
It is Friday, August 12, 2016. The moon
was first quarter on Wednesday and is in Sagittarius. The UN has declared this International Youth Day. It is also IBM PC Day, Klondike Gold Day
(1896), Sewing Machine Day, Vinyl Record Day, World Elephant Day, and Worldwide
Art Day. In Cuba they celebrate the
People's Victory Against Machado Tyranny; while in Massachusetts and Oklahoma
they celebrate Indian Day. Finally in
Texas it is Pioneer Day but in Thailand it is Queen's Birthday.
Among those born on this
day were ALF (alien life form, 1757), Robert Southey (1774), Robert Mills
(1781), Katharine Lee Bates (1859), Jacinto Benavente y Martinez (1866), Edith
Hamilton (1867), Cecil B deMille (1881), Erwin Schroedinger (1887), Jane Wyatt
(1912), John Derek (1926), Buck Owens (1929), William Goldman (1931), Porter
Wagoner (1932), John Poindexter (1936), Mark Knopfler (1949), and Charles E
Brady Jr (1951).
On August twelfth Singer
patented his sewing machine (1851), the first cargo of lumber left Vancouver
(1863), Edison invented the Edisonphone (1877), Hawaii was formally annexed by
the US (1898), Of Human Bondage was published (1915), the 9th modern
Olympic games closed (Amsterdam, 1928), the minimum wage rose from $.75 to $1
/hour (1955), the last US combat ground troops left Vietnam (1972), and the
Space Shuttle Enterprise made its first atmosphere flight (1977).
Tonight's Sky: the bright star to the upper left of
the moon is Altair. August Planets: Morning: Uranus and Neptune
/ Dusk: Mercury and Venus / Evening: Mars, Jupiter,
Saturn.
This Week: Saturday, August 13 - International
Lefthander's Day
Sunday, August 14
- National Navajo Code Talkers Day
Monday, August 15
- Cupcake Day and National No SpongeBob Day
Tuesday, August 16
- Wave at Surveillance Day
Night Sky, August 16: Mercury reaches greatest eastern elongation of 27.4° from
the sun.
Wednesday, August 17
- National Thrift Shop Day
Thursday, August 18
- Bad Poetry Day
Night Sky, August 18: Full (Sturgeon) Moon
Friday, August 19
- World Humanitarian Day
Saturday, August 20
- International Geocaching Day
Sunday, August 21
- Poet's Day
Monday, August 22
- Be an Angel Day
Tuesday, August 23 -
Valentino Day
Wednesday, August 24
- Pluto Demotion Day
Thursday, August 25 - Kiss and Make Up Day
Well," said Pooh, "what I like best," and then he
had to stop and think. Because although Eating Honey was a very good thing to
do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than
when you were, but he didn't know what it was called.” ― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
Ingress and Pokemon Go
Meet Up (Saturday, 11 am / Gaming Room) ...share good pokestop portal locations
..........You
will always have a lucky star.........Mark Knopfler .....Love and Happiness
^^ Baron
Pierre de Coubertin, a French educator, founded the International Olympic
Committee (IOC) in 1894. The 1896 Summer Olympics (Modern Greek: Θερινοί
Ολυμπιακοί Αγώνες 1896, Therinoí Olympiakoí Agó̱nes 1896), officially known as the Games
of the I Olympiad, was a multi-sport event held in Athens, Greece, from 6 to 15
April 1896.
Funniest thing I read of the Week: Soft
Wookiee, Warm, Wookie, Great big ball of fur / Hairy Wookiee, Angry Wookiee,
grr grr grr -Submitted by abf of ks
Moonbeam: The life of Liverpool is
commerce; it is a city of warehouses and shops.
--Katherine Lee Bates
Late Night
Snacks: Tomorrow
night is the official start of the Rio Summer Olympics, which is when the
entire world will come together for one reason: making fun of the outfits
athletes wear at the opening ceremonies.
--Jimmy Fallon / Sanitation is a big problem right now. The Olympic
village is giving away thousands of condoms for the athletes to wear over their
heads for the swimming events. --Jimmy
Kimmel / The Olympic torch arrived in Rio today in preparation for Friday's
opening ceremony. And the cool thing about Rio is, if the torch runs out of
fuel you can just dip it in the ocean and it’ll reignite. --Seth Meyers / Daniel
Ortega, the incumbent running for president in Nicaragua, just made his wife
his vice presidential running mate. This sounds like a guy who forgot it was
their anniversary. Really have to scramble for a gift. --James Corden / A lot
of people are talking about Donald Drumpf and Russia now. And not just because
of how much he resembles Russian dressing. --Stephen Colbert
For me,
every hour is grace. And I feel
gratitude in my heart each time I can meet someone and look at his or her
smile. --Elie Wiesel
It's
Not Torture If It's the Good Guys (Friday, 10 am / Room 2208) ... Zootopia and Captain America
..........If
I'm over the moon.........Mark Knopfler
.....Whoop De Doo
Anticipatory
Website of the Week:
Talk about waiting for the call that will never come, all Olympic swimming
events are required to have a lifeguard on duty. Here's one now...http://www.businessinsider.com/olympic-lifeguard-has-most-boring-job-in-rio-2016-8
^^^ The
stated mission of the International Olympic Committee (IOC) is to promote
Olympics throughout the world and to lead the Olympic Movement.
Worthless Fact
of the Week:
The mythological origins of the ancient games: Pelops organized chariot races
as thanksgiving to the gods for allowing himself and his squeeze, the nameless
daughter of king Oinomaos, to knock off the old king. No date is offered.
Weird Word of
the Week: Tickety-boo
- satisfactory, all in order, or OK. (Canadian). http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-tic1.htm
Wacky Uses for
Common Products:
Condition your hair. Warm up Star Olive
Oil, massage it into your hair and scalp, wrap your head in a towel, and sit
under a dryer. Later, shampoo as
usual. http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/star.html
Science Fiction
Convention of the Week:
Trekonderoga (Ticonderoga, NY) August 12-14.
To boldy go where no fan has gone before.
These days
they should have cell phone chargers in waiting rooms instead of magazines.
25
Things you need to know about spaceships (Sunday, 10 am / Room 3501D) ...especialy (sic) if you're a writer. ~~I would suggest 25 things you need to know
about proofing your work or perhaps a panel on grammar and spelling
...........Yeah,
the sun comes up and the sun goes down.........Buck Owens .....Blues For Life
^^^^ The first Winter
Olympic Games were held in Chamonix, France in 1924.
Next Funniest
Thing I Read of the Week:
I can't decide if "self-medicating" should be listed under hobbies,
interests, or special skills.
--Submitted by pl of ks
Word Shakespeare
Made Up of the Week:
Bloodstained - covered with blood. Titus
Andronicus Act II Scene III
(Martius)
Puck the Brave Episode of the
Week: Here's
our fearless Puck confronting the giant shadow in the case of the Black Russian
Terrier's Harrier.
I'm leaving now to go and find myself...If I should return before I get back, please ask me to wait.
The Very Pulse of the Machine (Thursday 5 pm / Room 2503B) ~~cyborgs, and AIs and Droids, oh, my
..........I'll
start wearing makeup like Jackson and Prince.........Mark Knopfler & Chet
Akins .....There'll Be Some Changes Made
^^^^^ 207 nations are participating in the 2016
Summer Olympic Games in Rio.
Month of the
Week: August is Get Ready for Kindergarten Month -- A police officer
came to my house and asked me where I was between 5 and 6. I replied, kindergarten.
Third Funniest
Thing I Read of the Week:
Worry about your own sins. You won't be
asked about mine. --submitted by sd of
ks
Famous Kansans: Dan Perkins aka Tom
Tomorrow, cartoonist, was born in Wichita in 1961. Tom's weekly cartoon, This Modern World, appears in c. 80 papers across the nation and
online at http://www.dailykos.com/blog/Tom%20Tomorrow.
Today's Peace of
History: Today's
Peace of History, August 12, 1995;
Thousands demonstrated in Philadelphia and other cities in support of
journalist and former Black Panther Mumia Abu-Jamal (on death row for murder
since 1982) in the largest anti-death-penalty demonstrations in the U.S. to
date.
I'm just
waiting to see if my coffee chooses to use its powers for good or evil today...
Kindness
in SF&F Literature (Sunday, 3 pm / Room 2207) ...trying their best to be decent to one
another under trying circumstances...
..........Once
I was waiting in fortune and fame.........Porter Wagoner .....A Satisfied Mind
Masthead of the Week: fRiday ePistle August 12, 2016. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Not
Even News. Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 1800 Goodell Ct. Lawrence, KS 66046
Fourth Funniest
Thing I Read of the Week:
Sign in an empty field: Interested In Time Travel? Meet here last Thursday, 7 pm. --Submitted by ma formerly of oh
Moonbeam: To be able to be caught
up into the world of thought - that is being educated. --Edith Hamilton
Cost of War:
Tax dollars spent in
Afghanistan: as of 8/11/16: $745,125,493,557.
Tax dollars spent in
Afghanistan: as of 8/4/16: $744,420,365,793.
Tax dollars spent on the
Iraq war since 2001 as of 8/11/16: $819,709,277,113.
Tax dollars spent on the
Iraq war since 2001 as of 8/4/16: $819,668,778,337.
Tax dollars spent on Daesh
conflict as of 8/11/16: $10,901,443,107.
Tax dollars spent on
Daesh conflict as of 8/4/16: $10,793,066,887.
Tax dollars spent on the
Pentagon Slush Fund as of 8/11/16: $126,852,064,738.
Tax dollars spent on the
Pentagon Slush Fund as of 8/4/16: $126,249,028,473.
Tax dollars spent on all
wars since 2001 as of 8/11/16: $1,705,874,729,293.
Tax dollars spent on all
wars since 2001 as of 8/4/16: $1,702,980,921,578.
As in
nature, as in art, so in grace; it is rough treatment that gives souls, as well
as stones, their luster. --Thomas
Guthrie
..........When
you think your world has come to an end.........Buck Owens .....I'll Still Be Waiting For You
“If you come
at four in the afternoon, I'll begin to be happy by three.” ― Antoine de
Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince
Famous Last
Words: ...Carrying
this joint resolution into effect. --Joint Resolution to Provide for Annexing the
Hawaiian Islands to the United States (1898)
May Peace be
always in time
And Joy be
always at hand
prairie mama
christine
Absolutely the final Funniest
Thing I Read of the Week:
Convincing your girlfriend she's crazy or paranoid is called gas-lighting, and
it's a dick move. But convincing her
she's a robot with artificially implanted human emotions is called blade-running. It's a Phillip K. Dick move. --Submitted by dc of ks
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