Famous
First Words:
Officially
known as 'King Buddha Yodfa Chulaloke the Great Day and Chakri
Dynasty Memorial Day
--Thailand
Chakri Memorial Day website
This
is New Beer's Eve. There's a big conference of beer
producers. At the end of the day, the presidents of all beer
companies decide to have a drink in a bar. The president of
'Budweiser' orders a Bud, the president of 'Miller' orders a Miller
Lite, Adolph Coors orders a Coors, and the list goes on. Then the
waitress asks Arthur Guinness what he wants to drink, and much to
everybody's amazement, Mr. Guinness orders a Coke! "Why don't
you order a Guinness?" his colleagues ask. "Naah. If you
guys won't drink beer, then neither will I." / Know what's
printed on the bottom of bottles of Geriatric
Hipster Club Ale? Open other end
..........Together
we can make honey.........Rolling Stones …..I'm A King Bee
50
Ways to Promote Peace #11: Advocate for animal rights (including
slaughter laws)
It
is a crisp (42°F) Friday morning. The sky is striped with puffy
white clouds and decaying jet trails with the pale, nearly quarter
moon watching the sun rise. A light breeze seems to be giggling with
spring. The grass is very green and growing and the flowering pear
buds seem to be hurrying to bloom before the next freeze. The ground
smells like spring as well, like soil and fresh growth and promise.
Puck is greeted heartily by Cooper and Cy and, when they are called
inside, sits in silence enjoying the lack of bustle and the morning.
Bird song comes from every direction except the feeders which are
empty at the moment. A fat lone bird of unknown breed sits silently
on the power lines that run behind the little wood across the street.
I take long, slow, deep breaths of the morning air and settle in to
stand here all day, but a siren and then another start up some
distance away and Puck feels obligated to join in as do several
unseen dogs. So we return to our rooms, to fresh Moose Munch coffee,
sweet and creamy, and thoughts of you, also sweet. So lucky to have
such a nice morning
Hope
your weekend is well-crafted, ePistliers.
When
Computer Companies Make Beer: DOS
Beer --Requires you to use your own can opener, and requires you to
read the directions carefully before opening the can. Originally only
came in 8-oz. can, but now comes in a 16-oz. can. However the can is
divided into 8 compartments of 2-oz. each, which have to be accessed
separately. Soon to be discontinued, although a lot of people are
going to keep drinking it after it is no longer available. / Where do
baboons go to drink Old English Oil Black Ale?
Duh, to the monkey bars.
..........There's
gotta be trust in this world.........Rolling Stones …..Good Times,
Bad Times
Trivia
Questions: Happy Birthday, Charlie the Tuna !
^ What brand of tuna
did/does Charlie sell?
^^ Who created
Charlie anyway?
^^^ Can you name
either of the LA radio personalities named Charlie Tuna?
^^^^ Why was Charlie
repeatedly rejected?
^^^^^ Any idea who
voiced Charlie?
First
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: DeVos said, “schools will
do better with less money.” Let's make her Secretary of Defense.
--submitted by ra of ks
Fake
Library Statistic of the Week:
A
group of librarians in the break room is known as a "Complaint"
https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
You
can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It
helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear
weapons, but at the very least you need a beer. --Frank Zappa
/ Transformers drink Hopitmus Prime.
..........Ain't
had no peace in the farm yard.........Rolling Stones …..Little Red
Rooster
Moonbeam:
The world of reality has its limits; the world of imagination is
boundless. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau
Something
to Think About of the Week:
Big
Hello:
Ne y windiga – Mossi (Burkina Faso)
https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Week
of the Week: Laugh at Work Week (April
1-7) – Some days, the best thing about my job is that the chair
spins. / Just being this awesome is a full-time job.
If
you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking
beer,
I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.--Deep Thoughts, Jack Handy
/ His idea of a balanced diet is a Hoppy Ending Pale Ale in
each hand.
..........And
he's tellin' me more and more.........Rolling Stones …..Satisfaction
^
Charlie hawks StarKist Tuna
Almanac:
It is Friday, April 6, 2018. The moon will be last quarter on Sunday
and is in Capricorn. The UN has declared this
International Day of Sport for Development and Peace. It is also
Army Day, National Sorry Charlie Day, Drowsy Driver Awareness Day,
Hostess Twinkie Day, National Student Athlete Day, New Beers Eve,
Tartan Day, Teflon Day, and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day
Saints Day. In Massachusetts it is Student Government Day. In
Ethiopia it is Victory Day while in South Africa it is Van Riebeeck
Day-founding of Capetown; and in Thailand it is Chakri Day. Because
it is the first friday it is also National Walk To Work Day, National
Kids Yoga Day, and Hospital Admitting Clerks Day.
Among
those who were born on this day were Raphael (1483), Rousseau (1671),
Elizabeth Barrett Browning (1806), Gustave Moreau (1826), Lowell
Thomas (1892), Donald Wills Douglas (1892), James Dewey Watson
(1928), Ralph Cooper (1951), Marilu Henner (1952), and John
Ratzenberer (1967).
On
April sixth a total solar eclipse was chronicled for the first time
(648 BCE), Petrarch met Laura (1327), slaves in New York revolted
(1712), the Mormon church was organized (1830), Brigham Young married
in 27th and final wife (1868), plastic was first patented (culluloid,
1869), the Salt Lake City Temple was dedicated (1893), the first
animated cartoon was copyrighted (1906), the north pole was reached
(Peary & Henson, 1909), Twinkies were invented (1930), Teflon was
invented (1938), the first tv dinner went on sale (1954), and Rolling
Stones Records was founded (1971).
Night
Sky, 4/6:
Right
after dark, Orion is still well up in the southwest in his spring
orientation: striding down to the right, with his belt turning
roughly horizontal. The belt points left toward Sirius and right
toward Aldebaran and, farther on, the Pleiades.
http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Science
Fiction Convention of the Week:
Gaslight Gathering 8: Carnival (San Diego, April 6-8) ...original
Steampunk & Neo-Victoriana Experience returns!
http://gaslightgathering.org/
Actual
Science Convention of the Week:
EMBO Practical Course – Molecular Interrogation of Single-Cells to
Decipher Population Heterogeneity & Plasticity. (April 6-13,
Sienna, Italy)
https://www.conference-service.com/conferences/molecular-biology.html
This
Week: Saturday, April 7 –
National Beer Day & National Handmade Day & No Housework Day
Night
Sky, 4/7: As
dawn approaches on Saturday the 7th, you'll find the waning Moon
bunching up with Mars and Saturn.
Sunday,
April 8 – Draw a Bird Day & National Dog Fighting
Awareness Day
Monday,
April 9 – Jumbo Day & Jenkins Ear Day & National
Cherish An Antique Day
Night
Sky, 4/9: At
this time of year, the two Dog Stars stand vertically aligned around
the end of twilight. Look southwest. Brilliant Sirius in Canis Major
is below; Procyon in Canis Minor is high above.
Tuesday,
April 10 – Equal Pay Day & Free Cone Day (Ben &
Jerry's) & National Library Day
Wednesday,
April 11 – Barbershop Quartet Day & National Pet Day &
Submarine Day
Night
Sky, 4/11: The
Sickle of Leo stands vertical high in the south these evenings. Its
bottom star is Regulus, the brightest of Leo. Leo himself is walking
horizontally westward. The Sickle forms his front leg, chest, mane,
and part of his head. The waning Moon passes Mars and Saturn in
early dawn. The Moon, as always, is drawn three times its actual
apparent size. And it's always positioned for an observer near the
middle of North America. As dawn approaches look for Mars and Saturn
to the left of the waning Moon.
Thursday,
April 12 – D.E.A.R Day (Drop Everything And Read Day) &
Walk On Your Wild Side Day
When
Computer Companies Make Beer: Windows '95 Beer --The
can looks a lot like Mac Beer's can, but taste more like windows 3.1
Beer. It comes in 32-oz. cans, but when you look inside, the cans
only have 16-oz. of beer in them. Most people will probably keep
drinking Windows 3.1 Beer until their friends try Windows '95 Beer
and say they like it. The ingredients list, when you look at the
small print, has some of the same ingredients that come in DOS Beer,
even though the manufacturer claims that this is an entirely new
brew. / Nerds invented Space
Station Middle Finger American Pale Ale
so mad scientists wouldn't rule the world.
..........Imagining
the world has stopped.........Rolling Stones …..Get Off Of My
Cloud
Next
Funniest thing I read of the Week: If really good-looking
people are “eye candy”, I guess that puts me somewhere around the
“eye broccoli” category.
Moonbeam:
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach.
--Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Late
Night Snacks: A spokesperson for House Speaker
Paul Ryan said yesterday that Special Counsel Robert Mueller should
be able to do his job. What a brave stance from the spokesperson for
the speaker of the House. Why does a speaker have a spokesperson?
YOU’RE the speaker. That’s like someone from Geico saying, “The
lizard believes he can save you 15 percent on car insurance.” I
want to hear it from the lizard. --Seth Meyers / Ireland will be
opening its first nude beach this April. And in May, Ireland will be
closing its first nude beach. --Conan O'Brien / According to a new
article from The Washington Post,
Drumpf has been privately insisting that the United States military
should pay for the Mexican border wall. And I’ve got to say, ladies
and gentlemen, it only took until he was 71 years old, but Drumpf
finally stopped avoiding the military! --James Corden / Huge
developments yesterday, when Stormy Daniels' attorney Michael
Avenatti, filed a motion seeking to depose President Donald Drumpf
and his lawyer Michael Cohen. Avenatti says that he "Intends to
prove that the hush agreement did not have a lawful object or
purpose." Oh, how dare you? Of course this agreement has a
lawful purpose! It has given Anderson Cooper hundreds of hours of
Stormy Daniels raw cleavage footage. --Stephen Colbert / Meanwhile,
congratulations to Drumpf’s BFF Vladimir Putin, who was elected
yesterday for his fourth term as president of Russia. He won in a
landslide. His opponents coincidentally died in a landslide. All of
them. --Jimmy Kimmel / It just came out that Drumpf’s secretary of
state, Rex Tillerson, was on the toilet when he found out Drumpf
fired him on Twitter. Then Drumpf said, “Wow, what a coincidence —
I was on the toilet when I tweeted that.” That’s right,
Tillerson was on the toilet when he was fired. Which explains why
Jeff Sessions and Betsy DeVos haven’t used a bathroom in six
months. --Jimmy Fallon
Classic
Not So Late Night Snacks: It's
incredibly complicated. The woman's name is Stormy Daniels, but her
real name is Stephanie Clifford. But in the contract with Trump, she
is referred to by the pseudonym Peggy Peterson. It is so tough to
keep all the names straight. Fortunately for Trump, when he gets
excited, he only shouts out his own name.
--Peter Sagal Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me 3/10/18
50
Ways to Promote Peace #10: If you have a platform, use it to educate.
I
drink to make other people interesting. --George Jean Nathan
/ Gandhi-Bot IPA goes through the body so fast because it
doesn't have stop and change color. ~~To the best of my research,
every micro brew mentioned in this ePistle is a real name of a real
beer.
..........I
have to turn my head until my darkness goes.........Rolling Stones
…..Paint It Black
^^^
Los
Angeles radio personality and voice-over artist Charlie
Tuna
(real
name: Art Ferguson) chose his on-air name early in his career upon
the departure of another Oklahoma
City
disc
jockey. All disc jockeys at KOMA were told to draw their on-air names
out of a hat, and by the time Chuck
Riley
picked
his on-air name out of a hat, every name had been drawn except for
"Charlie Tuna." Riley used the name for a week, and then
left. His replacement, Art Ferguson, inherited the name, and he would
keep the Charlie Tuna name upon relocating first to Boston and then
Los Angeles.
Word
Shakespeare Made Up of the Week: Vaulting – leaping or
springing while supporting oneself. King Henry VI, Part
II Queen
Margaret: The pretty-vaulting sea refused to drown me, knowing that
thou wouldst have me drown'd on shore.
Worthless
Fact of the Week:
Humorous
Phases of Funny Faces
is a silent cartoon by J. Stuart Blackton released in 1906. It
features a cartoonist drawing faces on a chalkboard, and the faces
coming to life. It is generally regarded by film historians as the
first animated film.
You can see it by clicking here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8dRe85cNXwg
Wicked
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week:
Amazon denies it was taunting Trump by shipping bone spur ointment to
the white house. --Submitted by rhb of ks
Weird
Word of the Week:
Esculent – edible “The
common or garden asparagus, is one of the luscious esculent
vegetables, with which tables can be furnished during the spring and
early part of the summer.” 1838
http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-esc1.htm
Wacky
Uses for Common Products:
Clean a metal coffee pot. Fill the percolator with water and add one
teaspoon 20 Mule Team Borax and one teaspoon detergent powder. Boil
the water, let the mixture sit for a few minutes, then rinse clean.
http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/20muleteam.html
You're
not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. -
Dean Martin / What
do you call a man with a pint of Kilt
Lifter
on his head? A taxi. Clearly, he's had too much.
...........When
you change with every new day.........Rolling Stones …..Ruby
Tuesday
^^^^
StarKist wants tuna that tastes good not tuna with good taste.
Quote
of the Week: My
point, once again, is not that those ancient people told literal
stories and we are now smart enough to take them symbolically, but
that they told them symbolically and we are now dumb enough to take
them literally. --John Dominic Crossan --Submitted by sd of ks
'Nother
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week:
Another fine day ruined by responsibility.
Science
Experiments You Can Do At Home of the Week:
Grow
your own rock candy – Rock
candy can form on a wooden stick or a string and you can add colors
and flavors to customize your candy in any way you can imagine!
https://www.wikihow.com/Make-Rock-Candy
Puck
the Brave
Episode of the Week:
Here's our fearless Puck and his faithful companion Cooper soaking up
sun in the case of the Basking Basenji.
People
who drink light 'beer' don't like the taste of beer; they just like
to pee a lot. -
Capital Brewery
/ Never text while driving, you might spill your Seriously
Bad Elf Winter Ale.
..........Have
you seen her dressed in blue.........Rolling Stones …..She's A
Rainbow
^^^^^
Actor Herschel Bernardi voiced Charlie in the commercials.
Month
of the Week: April is Frog Month – A
man in a movie theater notices what looks like a frog sitting next to
him. "Are you a frog?" asked the man, surprised. "Yes."
"What are you doing at the movies?" The frog replied,
"Well, I liked the book."
Most
Beautiful Thing in the State of the Week:
Snoqualmie aka Granite
Mountain, Washington – astounding
views from the summit of the Granite Mountain trail come at a price.
A nearly-1000-feet-of-elevation-gain-per-mile price. But views of
pointed Kaleetan Peak, deep blue Crystal Lake, the climber-dotted
Tooth, and Mount Rainier dominating the skyline to the south make it
all worth it.
https://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/granite-mountain-north-bend-2
Today's
Peace of History, April
6, 1712: The
North American British Colonies experienced their first slave
rebellion in New York City.
A
fine beer may be judged with only one sip, but it's better to be
thoroughly sure. -
Czech Proverb / A
man's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another Beard
of Zeus Lager.
..........I'm
a man of wealth and taste.........Rolling Stones …..Sympathy For
The Devil
Masthead
of the Week:
fRiday ePistle April 6, 2018, Eared ePistle Stout. Online at:
http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/
Generic Tag Line. Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 1800 Goodell Ct.
Lawrence, KS 66046
Moonbeam:
Dream no small dream; it lacks magic. Dream large. Then make the
dream real. --Donald Wills Douglas
Cost
of War:
Universal Soldier
As
of 4/5/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,809,669,253,094.
As
of 3/29/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,807,647,446,932.
As
of 4/5/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $818,794,567,539.
As
of 3/29/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $817,420,381,240.
As
of 4/5/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $578,998,793,728.
As
of 3/29/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $577,271,437,579.
As
of 4/5/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $287,226,984,304.
As
of 3/29/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $286,834,371,601.
As
of 4/5/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,494,690,237,414.
As
of 3/29/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,489,174,404,144.
50
Ways to Promote Peace #9: Volunteer for the Peace Corps.
http://uncustomary.org/50-ways-promote-peace/
..........It's
a gas, gas, gas.........Rolling Stones …..Jumping Jack Flash
“A
man who lies about beer makes enemies” – Stephen
King
/ Why don't Mormon's drink Polygamy
Porter?
It interferes with their suffering.
Famous
Last Words: So long, until tomorrow. --Lowell Thomas
May
Peace season your malt
And
Joy flavor your hops
prairie
mama
christine
Last
Laugh:
