Famous First Words: I dig a pygmy.. Opening intro of Let It Be, the Beatles last studio album
Happy Day Care Provider Day! I experienced a real nursery crime today. Someone broke in and stole all the Dr Seuss books at the Happy Times Childcare Center. §§ A toddler is like a blender without a lid.
..........what on earth is wrong with you?..........Robert Johnson …..Milkcow's Calf Blues
Political Freedom without economic equality is a pretense, a fraud, a lie; and the workers want no lying. --Mikhail Alexandrovich Bakunin
It is a gray Friday morning. The sky is thick with clouds, some white, some gray, a few moving under the denser cover. There is a slight breeze but the 61°F temperature is warm and fresh. Rain seems possible but not imminent. No bird song cheers the scene nor kisses the ear. Instead motor car sounds, both near and more distant, fill the air and bring to mind work and school and errands. I sit comfortably at my desk listening to Puck snoring. The coffee begins wake me up when I inhale that wonderful aroma and then tastes hot, creamy and delicious At last my favorite part of Friday mornings when my mind floods with thoughts of the ePistliers to whom I write...perhaps sitting at their desks or staring at their phones. Good morning to you all.
Hope your weekend is loving and caring and the best one this year, dear friends
First Funniest Things I Read of the Week: JD Vance is a fusion of every kid that vanished on the Wonka Factory Tour. --johnfugelsang / Oompa loompa doopety dope … Who f*cked a couch and murdered the Pope? --stevenhofstetter --Submitted by Catsonacouch
Cinco de Mayo Quote of the Week: I do not know the secret to happiness but I know I have never been unhappy in a Mexican restaurant.
One day I hope to be as savage as my toddler who just looked me in the eyes and said “uh oh” before snapping a toy in half. §§ Sign on the Daycare Center Door: Do Not Disturb! IT'S NAPTIME! You Wake 'em, You Take 'em
..........You got to please yourself..........Ricky Nelson …..Garden Party
Trivia Questions: Happy 149th Birthday to the Westminster Dog Show!
Where was the first Westminster Dog Show held?
How many breeds participated in the first Westminster Dog Show (WDS)?
What breed has won the most Best In Show awards?
How many and/or which breeds were added in 2026?
About how many dogs participated in the 2025 WDS?
Big Hello: Copoдэ – Ulch (a Manchu-Tungus language spoken in Siberia.) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: J Edgar Boozer formerly known as Kash Patel.
Image of the Week: Happy Fair Trade Day (cartoon from the 19th century)
My daycare changed their billing policy. Now we pay by the minute. §§ My toddler recently swallowed several plastic horses, but she's in stable condition.
.........Fell down on my knees..........Robert Johnson …..Crossroad
Moonbeam: Richard Nixon is a no good, lying bastard. He can lie out of both sides of his mouth at the same time; and if he ever caught himself telling the truth, he'd lie just to keep his hand in. --Harry S Truman
Blasphemy of the Week: A jealous lover of human liberty, deeming it the absolute condition of all that we admire and respect in humanity, I reverse the phrase of Voltaire, and say that, if God really existed, it would be necessary to abolish him. --Mikhail Bakunin
Coffee Joke of the Week: This coffee is so bad that when I pour it out it will go to perkatory.
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I do not WANT a gumbo recipe from the New York Times. I WANT a gumbo recipe from an old woman named Mawmaw Thibodeaux-Landry, who can bare knuckle box an alligator while reciting the Holy Rosary in Cajun French. https://www.facebook.com/groups/3998736640363910/
A toddler has more teeth, smells better, and has thrown tantrums for more justified reasons than a Capitol Rioter. §§ Justin is probably 30 by now, shouldn't someone have picked him up from daycare by now?
..........When we walked in the sands of the Waikiki..........Rickey Nelson …..Travelin' Man
1) The first WDS was held in Gilmore's Gardens, NYC, 1877.
Almanac: It is Friday, May 8, 2026. The moon will enter its last quarter tomorrow (5/9) and is in Aquarius. The United Nations has declared today and tomorrow Time of Remembrance & Reconciliation for Those Who Lost Their Lives During WWII. (8th & 9th) Today is also Child Care Provider Day, Free Trade Day, International Thalassaemia Day, National Animal Disaster Preparedness Day, National Cruelty Free Day, No Socks Day, Student Nurse Day, Victory in Europe Day, World Ovarian Cancer Day, and World Red Cross/Red Crescent Day. Because it is the second Friday in May it is Fintastic Friday: Giving Sharks a Voice and because it is the Friday before Mother's Day it is also Military Spouse Appreciation Day and National Public Gardens Day,
Among those born on this day were Edward Gibbon (1737), Miguel Hidalgo y Castilla (1753), Mikhail Alexandrovich Bakunin (1814), Jean Henri Dunant (1828), Oscar Hammerstein (1846), Louis Madelin (1871), Harry S. Truman (1884), Ezio Pinza (1892), Fulton J Sheen (1895), Jan (Fritz) van Hall (1899), Mary Lou Williams (1910), Robert Johnson (1911), Don Rickles (1926), Theodore Sorensen (1928), Gary Snyder (Japhy Ryder, 1930), Sonny Liston (1934), James Darren (1936), Thomas Pynchon (1937), Rick Nelson (Eric Hilliard, 1940), Peter Benchley (1940), Euclid "Motorhead" Sherwood (1942), Toni Tennille (1943), Alex Van Halen (1955), and Melissa Gilbert (1964).
On May eighth Coddington founded Newport (RI, 1639), the US established a military draft (1792), the rubber tire was patented (1847), John Brown held an anti-slavery convention (Chatham, Canada, 1858), the first Westminster Dog Show opened (1877), Sweden abolished capital punishment (1921), the first eye bank opened (NYC, 1944), the Beatles released Let It Be (1970), and the World Health Organization announced that smallpox had been eradicated (1980).
Night Sky, 5/8: The shadows of moons Europa and Ganymede will be visible crossing the clouds tops of Jupiter in the western sky just after sunset. Venus shines there too. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Fraternal Picture of the Week: Boys at bath
This Week: Saturday, May 9 – Alphabet Magnet Day & National Windmill Day & World Migratory Bird Day
Today is Letter Carriers' Stamp Out Hunger Food Drive Day
Sunday, May 10 – Mother's Day & Clean Your Room Day & National Hamster Day
Night Sky, 5/10: Sunrise: 6:12 am Sunset: 8:22 pm (14 hours and 10 minutes of daylight) Moonrise: 9:07 am Moonset: 6:13 pm
Monday, May 11 – Eat What You Want Day & National Foam Rolling Day & National Women's Check-up Day
Tuesday, May 12 – International Nurses Day & Native American Rights Day & Odometer Day
Night Sky,12: Head out an hour before sunrise on the mornings of May 12 to 13 to catch an eye-popping alignment in the eastern sky. Mars, Saturn, and the crescent moon will line up almost perfectly just above the east horizon. The trio will appear roughly an hour before sunrise, then climb higher before our bright star ascends.
Wednesday, May 13 – American Indian Day & Indigenous Arts Day & World Cocktail Day
Thursday, May 14 – National Chicken Dance Day & Underground America Day & National Decency Day
Florida just converted an abandoned off-shore oil rig into a daycare center. §§ I've started a diet where I only eat my toddler's leftover food. I've gained 10 pound.
..........Can't stand to leave her be..........Robert Johnson …..Kind Hearted Woman
2) Only 35 breeds were represented, along with a Miscellaneous class at the first WDS. As more breeds become recognized by the American Kennel Club, more are competing for the title of Best in Show at Westminster – so the competition only gets stiffer!
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: She said she liked a man who smells expensive. So I doused myself with gasoline.
Moonbeam: The proud man counts his newspaper clippings, the humble man his blessings. --Fulton J Sheen
Fun Fact of the Week: The Jewish year is 5789. The Chinese year is now 4723. This means that the Jews had to live for 1.063 years without Chinese food, a time known as the Dark Ages. https://www.facebook.com/grumpyoldgits
Video of the Week: Rick Nelson was my very first crush. Here he is singing Hello, Mary Lou on the Ozzie and Harriet show. (2:03) https://youtu.be/zLkCWT2neuI
Audio of the Week: All You Fascists Bound To Lose by The Resistance Revival Chorus https://youtu.be/dWUa7aAIfLE
The privileged man, whether he be privileged politically or economically, is a man depraved in intellect and heart. --Mikhail Alexandrovich Bakunin
Are they called baby boomers because their parents gave them dynamite when they were toddlers? §§ When the bough broke, how much did the daycare center have to pay in damages?
..........With her carefree devil eyes..........Ricky Nelson …..Poor Little Fool
3) Wire Fox Terriers have won Best In Show at Westminster 15 times. Scottish Terriers have won 8, English Springer Spaniels have won 6, and Pekingese have won 5.
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My son is making the impassioned case that “extraordinary” means something is even more ordinary than usual and although my evidence is strong -- ”that's not what it means” --I'm still, somehow, losing the argument. --Henpecked Hal
Weird Word of the Week: Thalassophile – a lover of the sea. https://www.surfinghandbook.com/what-is-a-thalassophile/
Dragon of the Week:
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Clean a grease stain from a vinyl floor. Pour Coca-Cola over the stain, let sit for two hours, and mop up the mess. The phosphoric acid in the coke helps dissolve the grease stain. https://www.surfinghandbook.com/what-is-a-thalassophile/
Question of the Week: How would the lives of the dinosaurs have been different if they'd had coffee.
Hello, is this L'il Tykes Daycare? This is Ethan. I'll be playing from home today. §§ I think my toddler could light the house. She generates about 100 “whats” a day.
...........Telephone every town I know..........Robert Johnson …..Dust My Broom
4) 3 new breeds were added this year. The Russian Tsvetnaya Bolonka - a dark, curly-coated toy breed from Russia; the Basset Fauve de Bretagne - a hound with royal heritage; and the Teddy Roosevelt Terrier - named in honor of a U.S. president, earned full American Kennel Club recognition on January 1, 2026.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The Titanic had a ballroom and yet it still sank. https://www.facebook.com/AzDemocraticWomen
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: The Watch City Steampunk Festival (9, Waltham, MA) ...free outdoor festival https://www.watchcityfestival.com/
Another Blasphemy of the Week: Extending ONE HAND to help somebody has more value than joining TWO HANDS for prayer. --Submitted by MMS
Spark of Joy of the Week: I just saw a cartoon by WARP. It is our moon. The Earth is circling around it. Our sun, Sol, is orbiting around them both. Three concentric circles. Moon Earth Sun The caption is What the Moon Believes.
My toddler is like Jesus; he can turn water into “whine”. §§ The motto at Mr Tatnaill's Daycare Emporium is “Just Don't Kill each Other!”.
..........I'm gonna run right by your side..........Ricky Nelson …..I'm Walkin'
5) About 3000 dogs participated in the 2025 dog show.
Protest Sign of the Week: Beware Of The Seashells
Quote of the Week: If the poor, the women, and the dispossessed sat at the tables where theological decisions are made, there would be a different set of sins. --Sister Joan Chittister.
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's crazy that in one lifetime I have recorded songs onto a cassette tape, burned them onto a CD, loaded them onto an MP3 player, and now I stream them from my phone. I feel like an historical documentary. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian
Today's Peace of History: May 8, 1961: An estimated 9 million people in Belgium participated in a ten-minute work stoppage to protest nuclear weapons.
Of course for a full 40 hours week here at Rainbow Childcare we have various payment options. How healthy is your liver? §§ An army of toddlers is called infantry.
..........I'm booked, I gotta go..........Robert Johnson …..Sweet Home Chicago
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, May 8, 2026: Toddlin' ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.
Moonbeam: I never make the mistake of arguing with people for whose opinions I have no respect. --Edward Gibbon
Cost of War:
Pentagon Spending as of 5/07/26: $610,538,452,895
Pentagon Spending as of 5/01/26: $592,500,326,688 (7 days in May, 18 billion dollars)
Pentagon Spending is April 2026: $ 81,264,897,294
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/category/military/
Powerful states can maintain themselves only by crime, little states are virtuous only by weakness. --Mikhail Alexandrovich Bakunin
Famous Last Words: Get back, oh yeah. The Beatles Get Back – final song of Let It Be
..........I thought about a moonlit night..........Ricky Nelson …..Hello, Marylou, Goodbye Heart
Well, you just don't want to be the parent whose toddler is causing the Daycare Lady to drink. §§ My toddler swallowed a bunch of Scrabble tiles. Her next bathroom trip spelled disaster.
May Peace play your soundtrack
And Joy sing your lullaby
prairie mama
christine
PS If the Trump administration was a comedy instead of a reality show, it would be pretty funny.
Last Laugh:
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