Famous First Words: Once upon a midnight dreary... --Edgar Allen Poe The Raven
All Hallows Eve approaches and the veil between the layers thins... Let's put the fun back in funeral. I don't want this to become a grave affair. In fact, schedule my funeral for 3 in the afternoon; I've never been a mourning person.
..........At a dark, bewitchin' hour when the fun was loud and hearty.........Louis Armstrong …..Skeleton in the Closet
It seems to me that if you or I must choose between two courses of thought or action, we should remember our dying and try so to live that our death brings no pleasure to the world --John Steinbeck
It is a delightful Friday morning. The sky is clear blue, the temperature is 54°F with a light breeze the smells of last night's rain. Squirrels and birds and even the trees seem to be celebrating that rain. Windchimes outside the window twist and tintinnabulate in a strange early morning ritual. I sit at my computer while Puck sleeps on a pile of the clothes I wore yesterday (because Mary is sleeping on his pillow). My half-caf is warm and dark and it sits next to a bottle of iced water. And I get to write to you. This has all the making of a really fine day.
Hope you have a fun and safe Halloween, ePistliers.
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: People who become right wing because they get annoyed by leftists are weak willed, most leftists are annoyed by leftists every single day. --Submitted by LaughingInDisbelief
A pillow fight with Death has reaper cushions. Actually the Reaper's son is so cute. He wears the ragged hoodie robe and carries a giant johnny mop. But he's only powerful enough to give you a brush with Death.
..........You could hear hell singing that victory song..........Anne Wilson …..Devil
Trivia Questions: All Hallows Eve – Blessed Be
- ^ How many bones are in the human skeleton?
- ^^ What was the original purpose of bobbing for apples?
- ^^^ What was the original name of candy corn?
- ^^^^ Would you care to estimate the number of calories in the average trick-or-treat bag?
- ^^^^^ Who was the first first lady to decorate the white house for Halloween?
Big Hello: Halo – Oshiwambo (Namibia and Angola) https://omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
First Halloween Tip of the Week: Halloween is right around the corner...Don't Buy Nestle Brand Treats! Nestle steals water from First Nations. --Submitted by 98%
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: On November 5th, it will be as if the whole world is waiting for the results of a biopsy. --Submitted by rhb of ks
Image of the Week: The first White House Halloween Decorations 1958 ~~This is on the test.
Halloween Library Jokes the Week: The library in Halloweentown has the world's largest collection of books by ghostwriters. Our local library celebrates Halloween with a monster book sale.
I can't decide whether to be buried where it's the mortician's job to make me look dead gorgeous or to be cremated where I'm bound to get a smokin' hot body, at least for a few minutes. But seriously, a burial site is the last thing I need.
..........Does the man become the monster or the monster become man..........Motionless in White …..Werewolf
Moonbeam: You don't play against opponents, you play against the game of basketball. --Bobby Knight
Blasphemy of the Week: If God didn't send Jesus into the world to condemn it, I doubt he sent you. --Submitted by MMS
Puzzle of the Week: From listener Mike Selinker, of Renton, Wash. Think of a drink whose name is a compound word. Delete the first letter of the first word and you'll get some athletes. Delete the first letter of the second one and you'll get where these athletes compete. What words are these?
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Bumper Sticker: J.D. Vance puts his cast iron skillet in the dishwasher. --Al Asran
I hope we stay friends until we die and then I hope we're ghost friends together and we walk through walls together and scare the sh*t out of people. You know, it's only ghosts who actually profit from cryptocurrency.
..........Really I'm sad, oh, I'm sadder than sad..........Smokey Robinson and the Miracles …..Tears of a Clown
^ Most humans have 206 bones although the body has 270 at birth. They claim it's fusion
Almanac: It is Friday, October 25, 2024. The moon went into its last quarter yesterday (10/24) and is in Leo. It is National Mole Day, Chucky -- The Notorious Killer Doll Day, International Artists Day, International Bandanna Day, National Breadsticks Day, National Pasta Day, and Sourest Day.
Among those born on this day were Johann Strauss (1825), Georges Bizet (1838), John Heisman (1869), Pablo Picasso (1881), Richard Byrd (1888), Minnie Pearl (1912), Billy Barty (1924), Marion Ross (1928), Anthony Franciosa (1928), Bobby Knight (1940), Helen Reddy (1941), and Julia Roberts (1967).
On October twenty-fifth Battle of Agincourt was fought (1415), Cassini discovered Iapetus, a moon of Saturn (1671), Peace talks began in Panmunjom (1951), Uganda was admitted to the UN (110th member, 1962), Steinbeck received the Nobel Prize (1962), and the International Red Cross was ousted from South Africa (1986).
Night Sky, 10/25: Venus is in conjunction with orange Antares low in twilight. Venus is 100 times brighter than Antares; look for the tiny orange point 3° to Venus's lower left. Binoculars will help you spot it through the twilight and the thick air near the horizon. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Fraternal Picture of the Week: Max is wearing a confident driver costume and Ollie is I'm Not Worried At All man.
Next Halloween Tip of the Week: What to do if there is a witch at your door: 1) Invited them in 2) Make tea 3) Plot against the puritans --Submitted by MMS
This Week: Saturday, October 26 – American Frog Day & Mule Day & Howl at the Moon Night
Sunday, October 27 – Black Cat Day & National Civics Day & Visit A Cemetery Day
Night Sky, 10/27: Mars rises at 11:29 pm and should be visible around 12:30 am. If you watch Mars for the rest of the year, you will see Mars and Jupiter moving apart. This is happening because Mars moves faster in its orbit. https://www.slsc.org/night-sky-update-october-19-27-2024/
Monday, October 28 – Champagne Day & National Chocolate Day & Childcare Superhero Day
Tuesday, October 29 – Internet Day & National Cat Day & Snowmobile Day & World Stroke Day
Wednesday, October 30 – Checklist Day & National Candy Corn Day & Mischief Night
Night Sky, 10/30 : Saturn is now past opposition. You can look for the planet rising in the southeast once it is dark. Saturn sets around 3:36 am
Thursday, October 31 – All Hallows Eve & Books For Treats Day & National Magic Day & Samhain & National UNICEF Day & National Doorbell Day & Beggar's Night
There are more dead people than living, and the numbers are increasing. The living are getting rarer. --Eugene Ionesco The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades, especially if your teammates are bad guessers. --Demetri Martin
..........Spins a web, any size, catches thieves just like flies.........Michael Bublé …..Spider-Man Theme
^^ Bobbing for apples was a kind of fortune-telling. By assigning each apple to a suitor, the retrieved apple was the future husband. https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/2019/10/8644201/halloween-history-traditions-women
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: How many witches does it take to change a light bulb? ….......................... Into what?
Moonbeam: That's what life is all about; remembering someone and smiling. --Minnie Pearl
Fun Fact of the Week: The full moon brightens the skies once every 19 Halloweens. This year the new moon is on November 1st, so the moon will be 28 days old on Halloween. By the way, it's in Libra on Halloween and Scorpio when it's new.
Video of the Week: Five Creepy Spiders (a subtraction video, 2:37) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpriiA7pw00
It takes courage to back truth unacceptable to our times. --John Steinbeck
Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. --Isaac Asimov On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily as lying down. --Woody Allen
..........Like a streak of light she arrives just in time.........Michael Bublé …..Spiderman Theme Song ~~In 2023 Spiderman was the #1 favorite costume for boys and the #4 favorite for girls.
^^^ Candy corn was marketed as Chicken Feed. It was marketed by Goelitz Candy Co which is now Jelly Belly Candy Co.
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: A recent Hogwarts study found that wearing a lab coat decreased the chances of being drowned or burned at the stake by 95%.
Game of the Week: End Of The World – place your bets: Earthquake 5% / Meteors 2% / Plague 8% / Human Stupidity 85% The South Dakota Department of Propaganda
Weird Word of the Week: Eldritch: Weird, ghostly, unnatural, frightful, hideous... Found in print since the 1500s. Scottish, related to the word elf https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/eldritch
Dragon of the Week:
Wacky Uses for Common Products: The skulls of your enemies are much more environmentally friendly than plastic cups. Just Sayin'. https://ifunny.co/#google_vignette
When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. --Ayn Rand When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction. --Steven Wright
...........Don't you love farce..........Judy Collins …..Send in the Clowns
^^^^ The average bag of treats has 3,500 to 7,000 calories.
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: They're taking our jobs and bringing drugs into our country. Well, that's convenient because I love drugs and I hate working. --Submitted by MMS
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Georgian Bay FanCon 2024 (26th, Meaford, ON) Jack-o-Lantern Carving Contest... https://www.gbfancon.ca/
Actual Science Conference of the Week: SmallSat Education Conference (26-27. Kennedy Space Center, FL) Keynote Speaker, Astronaut Ken Reightler, retired. https://www.smallsateducation.org/
Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Screwdriver ---> Crew + River
There is a strange little woman in Moscow who is quietly but relentlessly stealing the bones of Russian families and dumping them in a giant ravine north of town. People don't take her seriously because they don't understand tsar chasm. You may think that corpses are funny, but they are dead serious.
..........He's the hairy handed gent who ran amok in Kent.........Warren Zevon …..Werewolves of London
^^^^^ Mamie Eisenhower 1958 ~~See Image of the Week above
Grim Fact of the Week: If you put Jokes How I want to die... in Google, they pop right up with a Suicide Hotline. Of course, suicide wasn't what I had in mind at all. What I had in mind was “I want to live to be 90 and then be shot by a jealous wife”. Sigh!
Quote of the Week: The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life off our souls. --Pablo Picasso
Last Halloween Tip of the Week: Union Made Halloween Treats: American Licorice, Annabelle Candy Company. Bachman Company, See’s Candies, Brown & Haley, Ghirardelli Chocolate, Boyer Brothers, Hershey Company, Hershey Kisses, Hershey Milk Chocolate Bar, Hershey Milk Chocolate & Almonds Bar, Hershey Special Dark Bars, Hershey Nuggets, Rolo, Kit Kat Bars, Carmello Bar, Jolly Ranchers, Jelly Belly Candy Company, Just Born In, Mike & Ike, Peanut Chews, Hot Tamales, Ferrero Group (Nestle, Farley & Sathers), Laffy Taffy, Baby Ruth, Butterfingers, Russell Stover Candies, Tootsie Roll Industries, and Oak Leaf Confections.
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Her 8th day of placental liberation... ~~I love it
Today's Peace of History, October 25, 1955: Sadako Sasaki, following the Japanese custom of folding paper cranes – symbols of good fortune and longevity – persisted daily in folding cranes, hoping to create senbazuru (1000 paper cranes strung together) when a person's dream is believed to come true, died.
Might I just point out that Mercutio got stabbed in the gut and instead of seeking medical help, stood up and made a pun about it, then died. Exactly how I would go out. --Jeffrey the Space Walrus
..........The whispers and the screams.........Shinedown …..Devil
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, October 25, 2024, sPooky ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.
Moonbeam: I've always felt that, you know, the Almighty had a lot of things to do other than help my basketball team. --Bobby Knight
Cost of War:
- As of 10/24/24 State Department Costs: $248,970,969,494
- As of 10/17/24 State Department Costs: $248,403,542,956
- As of 10/24/24 Homeland Security: $1,182,140,910,690
- As of 10/17/24 Homeland Security: $1,181,524,474,579
- As of 10/24/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,254,505,483,247
- As of 10/17/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,222,205,430,763
- As of 10/24/24 Military Costs: $3,112,180,158,539
- As of 10/17/24 Military Costs: $3,110,976,705,497
- As of 10/24/24 Veterans Care: $3,934,734,141,704
- As of 10/17/24 Veterans Care: $3,922,719,621,761
- As of 10/24/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,732,534,269,942
- As of 10/17/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,716,546,436,575
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good. --John Steinbeck
Famous Last Words: Bless you, thank you. --Bill Graham who died in a helicopter crash 10/25/91 ~~These are his last public words.
..........Rattle them bones at midnight.........Alice Cooper …..Skeletons in My Closet
I saw the little tombstone my children are planning to get for me. I was, actually, hoping for a pyramid. That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, was against her better judgement. --Dorothy Parker
May
Peace instruct your body
And
Joy train your heart
prairie
mama
christine
Last Laugh:
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