sPooky ePistle

 Famous First Words: Once upon a midnight dreary... --Edgar Allen Poe The Raven

All Hallows Eve approaches and the veil between the layers thins... Let's put the fun back in funeral. I don't want this to become a grave affair. In fact, schedule my funeral for 3 in the afternoon; I've never been a mourning person.

..........At a dark, bewitchin' hour when the fun was loud and hearty.........Louis Armstrong …..Skeleton in the Closet

It seems to me that if you or I must choose between two courses of thought or action, we should remember our dying and try so to live that our death brings no pleasure to the world --John Steinbeck

It is a delightful Friday morning. The sky is clear blue, the temperature is 54°F with a light breeze the smells of last night's rain. Squirrels and birds and even the trees seem to be celebrating that rain. Windchimes outside the window twist and tintinnabulate in a strange early morning ritual. I sit at my computer while Puck sleeps on a pile of the clothes I wore yesterday (because Mary is sleeping on his pillow). My half-caf is warm and dark and it sits next to a bottle of iced water. And I get to write to you. This has all the making of a really fine day.

Hope you have a fun and safe Halloween, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: People who become right wing because they get annoyed by leftists are weak willed, most leftists are annoyed by leftists every single day. --Submitted by LaughingInDisbelief

A pillow fight with Death has reaper cushions. Actually the Reaper's son is so cute. He wears the ragged hoodie robe and carries a giant johnny mop. But he's only powerful enough to give you a brush with Death.

..........You could hear hell singing that victory song..........Anne Wilson …..Devil

Trivia Questions: All Hallows Eve – Blessed Be

• ^ How many bones are in the human skeleton?
• ^^ What was the original purpose of bobbing for apples?
• ^^^ What was the original name of candy corn?
• ^^^^ Would you care to estimate the number of calories in the average trick-or-treat bag?
• ^^^^^ Who was the first first lady to decorate the white house for Halloween?

Big Hello: Halo – Oshiwambo (Namibia and Angola) https://omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

First Halloween Tip of the Week: Halloween is right around the corner...Don't Buy Nestle Brand Treats! Nestle steals water from First Nations. --Submitted by 98%

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: On November 5^th, it will be as if the whole world is waiting for the results of a biopsy. --Submitted by rhb of ks

Image of the Week: The first White House Halloween Decorations 1958 ~~This is on the test.

Halloween Library Jokes the Week: The library in Halloweentown has the world's largest collection of books by ghostwriters. Our local library celebrates Halloween with a monster book sale.

I can't decide whether to be buried where it's the mortician's job to make me look dead gorgeous or to be cremated where I'm bound to get a smokin' hot body, at least for a few minutes. But seriously, a burial site is the last thing I need.

..........Does the man become the monster or the monster become man..........Motionless in White …..Werewolf

Moonbeam: You don't play against opponents, you play against the game of basketball. --Bobby Knight

Blasphemy of the Week: If God didn't send Jesus into the world to condemn it, I doubt he sent you. --Submitted by MMS

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Mike Selinker, of Renton, Wash. Think of a drink whose name is a compound word. Delete the first letter of the first word and you'll get some athletes. Delete the first letter of the second one and you'll get where these athletes compete. What words are these?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Bumper Sticker: J.D. Vance puts his cast iron skillet in the dishwasher. --Al Asran

I hope we stay friends until we die and then I hope we're ghost friends together and we walk through walls together and scare the sh*t out of people. You know, it's only ghosts who actually profit from cryptocurrency.

..........Really I'm sad, oh, I'm sadder than sad..........Smokey Robinson and the Miracles …..Tears of a Clown

^ Most humans have 206 bones although the body has 270 at birth. They claim it's fusion

Almanac: It is Friday, October 25, 2024. The moon went into its last quarter yesterday (10/24) and is in Leo. It is National Mole Day, Chucky -- The Notorious Killer Doll Day, International Artists Day, International Bandanna Day, National Breadsticks Day, National Pasta Day, and Sourest Day.

Among those born on this day were Johann Strauss (1825), Georges Bizet (1838), John Heisman (1869), Pablo Picasso (1881), Richard Byrd (1888), Minnie Pearl (1912), Billy Barty (1924), Marion Ross (1928), Anthony Franciosa (1928), Bobby Knight (1940), Helen Reddy (1941), and Julia Roberts (1967).

On October twenty-fifth Battle of Agincourt was fought (1415), Cassini discovered Iapetus, a moon of Saturn (1671), Peace talks began in Panmunjom (1951), Uganda was admitted to the UN (110th member, 1962), Steinbeck received the Nobel Prize (1962), and the International Red Cross was ousted from South Africa (1986).

Night Sky, 10/25: Venus is in conjunction with orange Antares low in twilight. Venus is 100 times brighter than Antares; look for the tiny orange point 3° to Venus's lower left. Binoculars will help you spot it through the twilight and the thick air near the horizon. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Max is wearing a confident driver costume and Ollie is I'm Not Worried At All man.

Next Halloween Tip of the Week: What to do if there is a witch at your door: 1) Invited them in 2) Make tea 3) Plot against the puritans --Submitted by MMS

This Week: Saturday, October 26 – American Frog Day & Mule Day & Howl at the Moon Night

Sunday, October 27 – Black Cat Day & National Civics Day & Visit A Cemetery Day

Night Sky, 10/27: Mars rises at 11:29 pm and should be visible around 12:30 am. If you watch Mars for the rest of the year, you will see Mars and Jupiter moving apart. This is happening because Mars moves faster in its orbit. https://www.slsc.org/night-sky-update-october-19-27-2024/

Monday, October 28 – Champagne Day & National Chocolate Day & Childcare Superhero Day

Tuesday, October 29 – Internet Day & National Cat Day & Snowmobile Day & World Stroke Day

Wednesday, October 30 – Checklist Day & National Candy Corn Day & Mischief Night

Night Sky, 10/30 : Saturn is now past opposition. You can look for the planet rising in the southeast once it is dark. Saturn sets around 3:36 am

Thursday, October 31 – All Hallows Eve & Books For Treats Day & National Magic Day & Samhain & National UNICEF Day & National Doorbell Day & Beggar's Night

There are more dead people than living, and the numbers are increasing. The living are getting rarer. --Eugene Ionesco The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades, especially if your teammates are bad guessers. --Demetri Martin

..........Spins a web, any size, catches thieves just like flies.........Michael Bublé …..Spider-Man Theme

^^ Bobbing for apples was a kind of fortune-telling. By assigning each apple to a suitor, the retrieved apple was the future husband. https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/2019/10/8644201/halloween-history-traditions-women

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: How many witches does it take to change a light bulb? ….......................... Into what?

Moonbeam: That's what life is all about; remembering someone and smiling. --Minnie Pearl

Fun Fact of the Week: The full moon brightens the skies once every 19 Halloweens. This year the new moon is on November 1^st, so the moon will be 28 days old on Halloween. By the way, it's in Libra on Halloween and Scorpio when it's new.

Video of the Week: Five Creepy Spiders (a subtraction video, 2:37) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpriiA7pw00

It takes courage to back truth unacceptable to our times. --John Steinbeck

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. --Isaac Asimov On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done as easily as lying down. --Woody Allen

..........Like a streak of light she arrives just in time.........Michael Bublé …..Spiderman Theme Song ~~In 2023 Spiderman was the #1 favorite costume for boys and the #4 favorite for girls.

^^^ Candy corn was marketed as Chicken Feed. It was marketed by Goelitz Candy Co which is now Jelly Belly Candy Co.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: A recent Hogwarts study found that wearing a lab coat decreased the chances of being drowned or burned at the stake by 95%.

Game of the Week: End Of The World – place your bets: Earthquake 5% / Meteors 2% / Plague 8% / Human Stupidity 85% The South Dakota Department of Propaganda

Weird Word of the Week: Eldritch: Weird, ghostly, unnatural, frightful, hideous... Found in print since the 1500s. Scottish, related to the word elf https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/eldritch

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: The skulls of your enemies are much more environmentally friendly than plastic cups. Just Sayin'. https://ifunny.co/#google_vignette

When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. --Ayn Rand When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction. --Steven Wright

...........Don't you love farce..........Judy Collins …..Send in the Clowns

^^^^ The average bag of treats has 3,500 to 7,000 calories.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: They're taking our jobs and bringing drugs into our country. Well, that's convenient because I love drugs and I hate working. --Submitted by MMS

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Georgian Bay FanCon 2024 (26^th, Meaford, ON) Jack-o-Lantern Carving Contest... https://www.gbfancon.ca/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: SmallSat Education Conference (26-27. Kennedy Space Center, FL) Keynote Speaker, Astronaut Ken Reightler, retired. https://www.smallsateducation.org/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Screwdriver ---> Crew + River

There is a strange little woman in Moscow who is quietly but relentlessly stealing the bones of Russian families and dumping them in a giant ravine north of town. People don't take her seriously because they don't understand tsar chasm. You may think that corpses are funny, but they are dead serious.

..........He's the hairy handed gent who ran amok in Kent.........Warren Zevon …..Werewolves of London

^^^^^ Mamie Eisenhower 1958 ~~See Image of the Week above

Grim Fact of the Week: If you put Jokes How I want to die... in Google, they pop right up with a Suicide Hotline. Of course, suicide wasn't what I had in mind at all. What I had in mind was “I want to live to be 90 and then be shot by a jealous wife”. Sigh!

Quote of the Week: The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life off our souls. --Pablo Picasso

Last Halloween Tip of the Week: Union Made Halloween Treats: American Licorice, Annabelle Candy Company. Bachman Company, See’s Candies, Brown & Haley, Ghirardelli Chocolate, Boyer Brothers, Hershey Company, Hershey Kisses, Hershey Milk Chocolate Bar, Hershey Milk Chocolate & Almonds Bar, Hershey Special Dark Bars, Hershey Nuggets, Rolo, Kit Kat Bars, Carmello Bar, Jolly Ranchers, Jelly Belly Candy Company, Just Born In, Mike & Ike, Peanut Chews, Hot Tamales, Ferrero Group (Nestle, Farley & Sathers), Laffy Taffy, Baby Ruth, Butterfingers, Russell Stover Candies, Tootsie Roll Industries, and Oak Leaf Confections.

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Her 8^th day of placental liberation... ~~I love it

Today's Peace of History, October 25, 1955: Sadako Sasaki, following the Japanese custom of folding paper cranes – symbols of good fortune and longevity – persisted daily in folding cranes, hoping to create senbazuru (1000 paper cranes strung together) when a person's dream is believed to come true, died.

Might I just point out that Mercutio got stabbed in the gut and instead of seeking medical help, stood up and made a pun about it, then died. Exactly how I would go out. --Jeffrey the Space Walrus

..........The whispers and the screams.........Shinedown …..Devil

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, October 25, 2024, sPooky ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: I've always felt that, you know, the Almighty had a lot of things to do other than help my basketball team. --Bobby Knight

Cost of War:

• As of 10/24/24 State Department Costs: $248,970,969,494
• As of 10/17/24 State Department Costs: $248,403,542,956
• As of 10/24/24 Homeland Security: $1,182,140,910,690
• As of 10/17/24 Homeland Security: $1,181,524,474,579
• As of 10/24/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,254,505,483,247
• As of 10/17/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,222,205,430,763
• As of 10/24/24 Military Costs: $3,112,180,158,539
• As of 10/17/24 Military Costs: $3,110,976,705,497
• As of 10/24/24 Veterans Care: $3,934,734,141,704
• As of 10/17/24 Veterans Care: $3,922,719,621,761
• As of 10/24/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,732,534,269,942
• As of 10/17/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,716,546,436,575

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

And now that you don't have to be perfect, you can be good. --John Steinbeck

Famous Last Words: Bless you, thank you. --Bill Graham who died in a helicopter crash 10/25/91 ~~These are his last public words.

..........Rattle them bones at midnight.........Alice Cooper …..Skeletons in My Closet

I saw the little tombstone my children are planning to get for me. I was, actually, hoping for a pyramid. That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, was against her better judgement. --Dorothy Parker

May Peace instruct your body
And Joy train your heart
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh:

sTripped ePistle

 Famous First Words: Well, I, uh, don't think it's quite fair to condemn a whole program because of a single slip-up, sir. --George C Scott as General Buck Turgidson in Dr Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)

Today is Newspaper Comic Strip Appreciation Day! Lucy to Snoopy: You'll never be a good theologian; you're too dogmatic. + Having lost sight of our objective we redoubled our efforts. --Pogo

..........But he could play a guitar just like a-ringin' a bell.........Chuck Berry …..Johnny B Goode

The state has no business in the bedrooms of the nation. --Pierre Trudeau

It is a beautiful Friday morning. The sun is shining and the temperature is 57°F. There are no clouds in the azure skies; only bird grace the air. Squirrels are busy even early in the morning. A fine fall day by any standards. Puck has been out explaining to the squirrels about how it wasn't their yard but it didn't slow them down one whit. So he came back in and is taking his early morning nap. A light breeze sways the wind-chimes but they remain silent. Yellow leaves twist downward from the trees assuring the sun can reach the ground when it is cold and we need it the most. A distant train whistle comes closer until the sound of engines roaring catches up to the whistle and it passes away to the east. A lovely, lazy morning and best of all I get to write to you.

Hope your weekend gives you a great big laugh, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Life has no remote, get up and change it yourself. --Submitted by nm of ks

I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone's expectations. -Calvin (and Hobbes) + Little Orphan Annie stole that money because she wanted to be wanted.

..........You done started back doin' the things you used to do.........Chuck Berry …..Maybelline

Trivia Questions: Today is Persons Day in Canada

• ^ Which person does Persons Day celebrate?
• ^^ Who was the first “new person” appointed to the Canadian Senate?
• ^^^ When did the Canada Royal military create divisions for women?
• ^^^^ Who is Elsie Knott and why is she important to Canadian women?
• ^^^^^ Which “persons” were still excluded by the 1929 ruling?

Big Hello: Namascāra – Oriya (spoken in Odisha aka Orissa, India) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes, tell you how to tie your laces. --Submitted by cf of ks

Image of the Week: Puck's new playpals; Mary up top and Martha below … the monkey was just there.

Library Joke of the Week: A bookmark should be known as a quitter strip. ΞΞ I'm not paying taxes that support libraries so I can access books. I'm paying taxes that support libraries so I can live in a society where everyone has access to books. --Professor Vincent

Sally once called Snoopy “Beagligerent” because he growled at her. + I've reached the age where Happy Hour is a nap. --Dagwood Bumstead

..........Rockin' in two by two...........Chuck Berry …..Roll Over Beethoven

Moonbeam: Mr Clinton better watch out if he comes down here. He'd better have a bodyguard. --Jesse Helms (late senator from North Carolina)~~The threat of violence has been part of the Republican agenda for at least 30 years. (1994)

Front Half of the Joke of the Week: The thing is, Die Hard wasn't a Christmas movie originally. The script was changed by Constantine in 336 AD to align it with the Sol Invictus festival. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Blasphemy of the Week: If religions advocate peace, then why aren't their extremists extremely peaceful? --Submitted by MMS

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Joe Krozel, of Creve Coeur, Mo. Think of a place in America. Two words, 10 letters altogether. The first five letters read the same forward and backward. The last five letters spell something found in the body. What place is this? NPR Sunday Puzzle 10/6/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Throwing a condom on a microphone while reporting live from a hurricane is the most Florida thing I've ever seen. --Submitted by Science Humor

I think my dad is 14. That's as high as I can count. --Jeffy (Family Circus) + Pessimism:+ a pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists. --archy (archy and mehitabel)

Well, to be frank, I'd need to change my name.

..........Riding along in my automobile.........Chuck Berry …...No Particular Place To Go

^ On October 18, 1929 the Privy Council of Canada found for women declaring that women were persons under the law.

Almanac: It is Friday, October 18, 2024. The moon was full (Hunters) yesterday (10/17) and is in Taurus. It is Mammography Day, Hard Boiled Guy/Girl Day, National Chocolate Cupcake Day, Meatloaf Appreciation Day, International Legging Day, International Necktie Day, Newspaper Comic Strip Appreciation Day, and World Menopause Day.

Among those born on this day were Heinrich von Kleist (1777), Lotte Lenya (1898), Pierre Trudeau (1919), Jesse Helms (1921), Melina Mercouri (1925), Chuck Berry (1926), George C. Scott (1926), Lee Harvey Oswald (1939), Mike Ditka (1939), Willie Horton (1942), Laura Nyro (1947), and Jean-Claude Van Damme (1958).

On October eighteenth the first US labor organization formed (Boston Shoemakers, 1648), the Treaty of Aix-la-Chapelle, ended the War of Austrian Succession (1748), the Mason Dixon line was agreed upon (1767), the first commercial long-distance phone line opened (1892), the BBC was established (1922), and Circus Circus opened (1968).

Night Sky, 10/18: Epsilon Geminids Meteor Shower. Unfortunately the full moon means lower visibility. https://starwalk.space/en/news/october-meteor-showers#october-18-epsilon-geminids-peak

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Having defeated the Giant King, they ascended his throne.

Fall in love with your problems, maybe they'll leave you too.

This Week: Saturday, October 19 – Accounting Day & Bridge Day & Evaluate Your Life Day

Sunday, October 20 – International Chef's Day & International Day of Air Traffic Controllers & National Day on Writing

Night Sky,10/20: Around mid-evening the bright, gibbous moon will rise in the east with brilliant Jupiter shining a palm's width to its lower right.

Monday, October 21 – Alaska Day & Reptile Awareness Day & National Witch Hazel Day

Night Sky, 10/21: Orionid Meteor Shower: radiance rises before midnight and is highest in the sky around 2 am. https://earthsky.org/clusters-nebulae-galaxies/everything-you-need-to-know-orionid-meteor-shower/

Tuesday, October 22 – INTERNATIONAL CAP LOCKS DAY & Make A Dog's Day & Smart Is Cool Day

Wednesday, October 23 – TV Talk Show Host Day & National Mole Day

The swallows depart from San Juan Capistrano

Thursday, October 24 – Food Day & United Nations Day

Beetle Bailey was so lazy if he got shot, he'd ask for help getting to the ground. + Smilin' Jack was a great adventurer until he flew to Antarctica. That's when things went south.

..........Tell him he can take the freeway down.........Chuck Berry …...Run Rudolph Run

^^ Women were legally recognized as "persons" under the law, allowing them to be appointed to the Senate, which previously excluded them; Cairine Wilson became the first woman to be appointed to the Senate shortly after the ruling.

Secondary Blasphemy of the Week: In the beginning there was nothing. Then God said, “Let there be light”, and there was still nothing, but you could see it. --Submitted by sb of ar

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Got stuck behind a car with the licence number plate: G4ND4LF. Don't know who it was, but he wouldn't let me pass. -Mariana Z

Moonbeam: We must make a journey around the world to see if a back door has perhaps been left open. --Heinrich von Kleist

Fun Fact of the Week: Happy International Necktie Day! Every year Americans spend approximately $1 billion to purchase 100 million neckties.

Video of the Week: Melina Mecouri dancing and singing Never On Sunday

I bear solemn witness to the fact that NATO heads of state and of government meet only to go through the tedious motions of reading speeches, drafted by others, with the principal objective of not rocking the boat. --Pierre Trudeau

My roommate in college was a weird performance artist who outlined all his painting using his penis. I should never have moved in with Dick Tracy. + Accordion t' my ironclad memory, we's gettin' close. --Joel (Gasoline Alley)

..........Walk but you'll never get away..........Laura Nyro …..Eli's Comin'

^^^ 1941: Women’s Divisions were established in the Army Corps and the Royal Canadian Navy.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: He's one cloudless night away from baying at the moon. --Submitted by sd of ks

Back Half of the Joke of the Week: It (Dire Hard) was declared a Christmas Movie at the Council of Nicea. I can't believe I have to get angry about this. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Weird Word of the Week: Rannygazoo – century old term for a deceptive story or scheme, i.e. fake news. http://www.worldwidewords.org/ww-ran2.html

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Lubricate nails and screws. Nails and screws rubbed with ChapStick will go into wood more easily. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/chapstick.html

What are you doing here? --Little Nemo We're BEING here. --Oompy + Procrastination: Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. --archy (archy and mehitabel)

...........Surry on down.........Laura Nyro …..Stone Soul Picnic

^^^^ In 1954 Elsie Knott became the first woman elected chief of a First Nations community

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I bought a bag of dog kibble this week. One of the selling points on the bag is “farm-raised beef”. But they missed it. The very best beef is raised in small pens in the attic.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: OryCon 44 – 2024 (18-20, Portland, OR) Oregon's oldest literary and creative convention https://orycontemp.tezhme.net/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 2024 Conference on Digital Experimentation @ MIT (18-19, Cambridge, MA) ...capability to rapidly deploy and iterate micro-level, in-vivo, randomized experiments in complex social and economic settings... https://ide.mit.edu/events/code24/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: New England (newen and gland)

Beetle Bailey was so lazy when he dropped something he waited until he needed to untie his shoe to pick it up. (Mort Walker, Beetle Bailey) + You're just sore because Brenda got the O'Shea story while you were sitting on your claws. --Pesky Miller, cub reporter (Brenda Starr)

..........a little magic, a little kindness..........Laura Nyro …..Sweet Blindness

^^^^^ All women in Canada were granted the right to vote in federal elections. Until the Canada Elections Act was enacted in 1960, First Nations women could not vote unless they had lost or given up their treaty rights and Indian status.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: The Enemies List will keep you howling and his enemies scowling. From Noam Chomsky to Yoko Ono, from Peter, Paul, and Mary … ~~Mary Travers died in 2009. Peter and Paul are still alive https://groveatlantic.com/book/the-enemies-list/

Quote of the Week: If you believe what you read in the comic strips, then you believe that mice run around with little gold buttons on their red pants and drive cars. --Mort Walker (Beetle Bailey and Hi & Lois)

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Your ancestors didn't sustain millina of complex oral story traditions for you to call audiobooks cheating. --bookish.bailee --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

If you are having second thoughts you 're two ahead of most people.

Today's Peace of History, October 18, 1648: The Shoemakers Guild of Boston became the first labor union in the American colonies.

Don't take life so serious. It ain't nohow permanent. --Pogo + When Terry finally caught the pirate, she had a paper towel fashioned as a tricorn pirate's cap. When Terry mocked her for it, she replied, “I've had a bounty on my head for quite a while now.” (Terry and the Pirates)

..........My lover's mouth been so good to me..........Laura Nyro …..Woman's Blues

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, 2024, sTripped ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Success isn't permanent and failure isn't fatal. --Mike Ditka

Cost of War:

• As of 10/17/24 State Department Costs: $248,403,542,956
• As of 10/10/24 State Department Costs: $247,840,494,552
• As of 10/17/24 Homeland Security: $1,181,524,474,579
• As of 10/10/24 Homeland Security: $1,180,913,044,667
• As of 10/17/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,262,920,430,447
• As of 10/10/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,251,348,012,206
• As of 10/17/24 Military Costs: $3,110,976,705,497
• As of 10/10/24 Military Costs: $3,109,782,907,489
• As of 10/17/24 Veterans Care: $3,922,719,621,761
• As of 10/10/24 Veterans Care: $3,910,801,318,274
• As of 10/17/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,716,546,436,575
• As of 10/10/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,700,688,615,498

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The attainment of a just society is the cherished hope of civilized men. --Pierre Trudeau

Famous Last Words: Of course, the whole point of a Doomsday Machine is lost, if you keep it a secret. --George C Scott as General Buck Turgidson's final line in Dr Strangelove

..........Mother of the wind boys livin' off the lovewell..........Laura Nyro …..Lu

We have met the enemy and he is us. --Pogo + It's a magical world, Hobbes, ol' buddy...Let's go exploring. --Calvin

May Peace warm your emotions
And Joy warm your action
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh: The Tale of Norton the Dragon, a strip by David Morris from the 1980s.

eGgotic ePistle

 Famous First Words: Good evening... John Belushi First SNL skit ever aired in 1975

Welcome to World Egg Day! Chickens stay fit with eggercise. The local breakfast joint on the corner is offering American Breakfast with a Double Shot Eggresso.

..........Everybody thinks it's true..........Paul Simon …..Train In The Distance ~~At Jo's house one can hear trains. You can hear the Union Pacific which runs on the north side of the Kaw river and the Santé Fe* which runs on the south. I grew up near a train track and love the sound. ~~~~Rail travel at high speeds is not possible because passengers, unable to breathe, would die of asphyxia. --Dionysius Lardner

*In Kansas, apparently, it is still called The Atchison, Topeka, and the Santé Fe. --Take that New Mexico

A woman is like a tea bag – you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water. --Eleanor Roosevelt

It is a gorgeous Friday morning. The temperature is 73°F with a very light breeze. The sky is pale blue with no clouds – or planes or birds. I have been to my general practitioner doctor who says I'm okay and don't have to come back until January; so I am officially done with doctors this year. Puck has been out twice to pee among the giant trees in the backyard and now he's resting on his pillow. I am sipping water – haven't had coffee yet – and feeling smug about not needing to go back to any of the doctors. In fact the only concern left to me is whether the election will actually be over on November 6^th.

Hope your weekend goes eggactly the way you want, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Enjoy Life – It has an expiration date. --Submitted by Banksy Art 2024

When the egg got deviled, his friends called the eggsorcist. Words and eggs must be handled with care. Once broken they are impossible things to repair. --Anne Sexton

..........Got two good eyes but we still don't see.........Grateful Dead …..Casey Jones

Trivia Questions: Happy 49^th Birthday, Saturday Night Live

• ^ Who is credited with creating SNL?
• ^^ Who is the longest running cast member?
• ^^^ What is the phrase usually said at the end of the cold open?
• ^^^^ Who has hosted the highest number of episodes?
• ^^^^^ Who was the first Weekend Update anchor?

Big Hello: Ahó - Omaha https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If God had meant for us to fly, God wouldn't have given us railways.

Special Images of the Week from North Carolina: Removed because i mistakenly did not have permission from the author.

Classic Fake Library Statistics of the Week: The average librarian cardigan conceals two pencils, a flask, and an emergency kitten. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=t

Reading Joke of the Week: Reading for pleasure implies the existence of Reading for pain.

If you've broken the eggs, you should make the omelet. --Anthony Eden / Fresh eggs taste better because they just got laid.

..........way down, way down in my soul.........Jimi Hendrix …..Hear My Train A' Comin'

Moonbeam: Give me something to dance about, and I'll dance it. --Jerome Robbins

Blasphemy of the Week: The greatest trick the Devil ever did was convincing politically passionate Christians that the only way to be a true & faithful Christian is to be a bigoted, hate-mongering, lying sinner, who lives the opposite of all of Jesus' teachings. --Max Maxwell

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Curtis Guy, of Buffalo, NY: Name a certain breakfast cereal character. Remove the third, fifth, and sixth letters and read the result backward. You'll get a word that describes this breakfast cereal character. What is it? NPR Sunday Puzzle 9/29/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you ever need me, I'm always just 5 missed calls and 6 text messages away. --Submitted by INRITH

Little known fact: Edith the Egg accompanied Lewis and Clark on their journey west. She's probably the world's most famous eggsplorer. The present was an egg laid by the past that had the future inside its shell. --Zora Neale Hurston

..........I hear the train a-comin', it's rolling 'round the bend..........Johnny Cash …..Folsom Prison Blues

^ Saturday Night Live (SNL) was created by Lorne Michaels and developed by Michaels and Dick Ebersol to air on NBC.

Almanac: It is Friday, October 11, 2024. The moon entered the first quarter yesterday (10/10) and is in Capricorn. It is International Day of the Girl Child, General Pulaski Memorial Day, National Coming Out Day, Southern Food Heritage Day, Emergency Nurses Day, Myths & Legends Awareness Days For All Fantasy Movie, Books, and National Pet Obesity Awareness Day. Because it is the second Friday it is also World Egg Day and National Family Bowling Day (or Kids Bowl Free Day).

Among those born on this day were Eleanor Roosevelt (1884), Jerome Robbins (1918), Art Blakey (1919), Elmore Leonard (1925), Dottie West (1932), Daryl Hall (1948), and Luke Perry (1971).

On October eleventh slavery was abolished in Maryland (1864), the Daughters of the American Revolution was founded (1890), Saturday Night Live premiered (Host George Carlin, 1975), Reagan met with Gorbachev in Reykjavik (1986), and Anita Hill testified against Clarence Thomas (1991).

Night Sky, 10/11: Comet low in twilight. Tsuchinshan-ATLAS (C/2003A3) https://earthsky.org/space/comet-c-2023-a3-sep-oct-2024-tsuchinshan-atlas/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: I have been told the dog's name, but I don't remember. I'm pretty sure the boys are Max and Ollie

This Week: Saturday, October 12 – Drink Local Wine Day & Free Thought Day & National Farmers' Day

Sunday, October 13 – English Language Day & National Chess Day & Silly Sayings Day

Night Sky, 10/13: Epsilon Geminids Meteor Shower: begins mid-evening, highest at 2 am. https://earthsky.org/astronomy-essentials/everything-you-need-to-know-geminid-meteor-shower/

Monday, October 14 – National Kick Butt Day & Native American Day & World Standards Day

Tuesday, October 15 – Blind Americans Equality Day & National Grouch Day & White Cane Safety Day

Wednesday, October 16 – Dictionary Day & National Feral Cat Day & Sukkot Day 1

Night Sky, 10/16: Lunar Eclipse (almost) Calculations show that the Sun, Earth, and Moon will be very closely aligned on this day, but there will be no lunar eclipse. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Thursday, October 17 – Black Poetry Day* & National Edge Day & Pay Back A Friend Day

*My favorite poem by a Black Poet is Give Us Our Peace by Langston Hughes https://www.how-matters.org/2011/09/16/langston-hughes/

Truth and eggs are useful only while they are fresh. --Austin O'Malley When the Easter Bunny had made all the deliveries she was egghausted.

..........Passing trains that have no names.........Arlo Guthrie …..The City Of New Orleans

^^ Kenan Thompson has been on the show for 21 seasons. He started in 2003.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Coffee: You haven't had enough until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running.

Special Images of the Week from North Carolina: Removed because i mistakenly did not have permission from the author.

Moonbeam: If work was a good thing, the rich would have it all and not let you do it. --Elmore Leonard

Fun fact of the Week: The first amniotic eggs, which are hard-shelled eggs that could be laid on land, appeared around 312–340 million years ago. The first chickens evolved much later, around 58,000 years ago at the earliest, So the egg came first.

Video of the Week: Judy Garland singing The Atchison, Topeka, and the Santé Fe from the film The Harvey Girls (1946). It won Best Song that year. https://www.facebook.com/watch/?

v=374999901982787

It isn't enough to talk about peace. Once must believe in it. An it isn't enough to believe in it. One must work at it. --Eleanor Roosevelt

Omelet smarter than I look. It may be the cock that crows, but it is the hen that lays the egg, --Margaret Thatcher

..........Bought a one way ticket back to the life that he once knew.........Gladys Knight & the Pips …..Midnight Train to Georgia

^^^ Live from New York, it's Saturday Night!

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: “I won't back down” --Tom Petty “I may readjust my stance if you have a convincing argument.” -Tom Reasonable

Weird Word of the Week: Quodlibet: It started life in the sense of a topic for philosophical or theological discussion. It has since transformed its meaning to refer to a light-hearted medley of well-known tunes. https://www.worldwidewords.org/ww-quo1.html

Dragon of the Week:

Special Images of the Week from North Carolina: Remove because i mistakenly did not have permission from the author.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Remove a scuff mark from a CD or DVD. Rub a little ChapStick lip balm over the mark and buff clean with a soft cloth or a coffee filter. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/chapstick.html

A day without an argument is like an egg without salt. --Angela Carter How many chickens does it take to change a light bulb? It takes a whole flock, but they won't finish the job. One to Pullet loose, one to Lay out the bulb, and everybody else will just sit there and Brood.-

...........Can't you hear the whistle blow..........Lots of People …..I've Been Working On The Railroad

^^^^ Alec Baldwin has hosted a record 18 episodes.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I was kidnapped by mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Creation Charlotte 2024 (11-13, Concord, NC) The road so far...the road ahead https://www.creationent.com/cal/ce_nc/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: Collide 2024 (10-11, Atlanta, GA) The South's largest Data and AI Conference https://datasciconnect.com/events/collide/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Toucan Sam → Mascot

Comedyhens tell the best chicken jokes. A hen's egg is, quite simply, a work of art, a masterpiece of design and construction with, it has to be said, brilliant packaging. --Delia Smith

..........He hears the silence howling.........Jethro Tull …..Locomotive Breath

^^^^^ Chevy Chase was co-creator of Weekend Update and was the anchor for the 75-76 season Writers Herb Sargent and Al Franken were the other creators.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: Documents filed during legal proceedings in the US have revealed that Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's son Yair Netanyahu had commercial ties with an American company called Parlement Technologies, the former parent company of Parler, a controversial social network affiliated with the far-right. Parler went offline in the wake of reports that it fueled the January 6th coup attempt, https://www.haaretz.com/israel-news/2024-10-02/ty-article/.premium/the-secret-commercial-ties-between-yair-netanyahu-and-far-right-social-network-parler/00000192-4856-d07b-aff3-5ff690880000

Quote of the Week: I have noticed that even people who claim everything is pre-determined and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road. --Stephen Hawking

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Pro Tip: Deporting half of the agriculture workers won't lower grocery prices. --Submitted by gr of oh

Today's Peace of History, October 11, 1987: More than half a million people flooded Washington, D.C., demanding civil rights for gay and lesbian Americans, now celebrated each year as National Coming Out Day. Many of the marchers objected to the government's response to the AIDS crisis, as well as the Supreme Court's 1986 decision to uphold sodomy laws in Bowers v. Hardwick

A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg. --Samueo Butler JD Vance's egg was seen acting weirdly today. I guess it's eggcentric.

..........She's a mighty good road.........Johnny Cash …..The Rock Island Line

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, 2024, eGgotic ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: In order to create, one must be willing to take risks and push boundaries. --Jerome Robbins.

Cost of War:

• As of 10/10/24 State Department Costs: $247,840,494,552
• As of 10/03/24 State Department Costs: $247,275,980,549
• As of 10/10/24 Homeland Security: $1,180,913,044,667
• As of 10/03/24 Homeland Security: $1,180,299,808,432
• As of 10/10/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,251,348,012,206
• As of 10/03/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,249,771,026,199
• As of 10/10/24 Military Costs: $3,109,782,907,489
• As of 10/03/24 Military Costs: $3,108,85,484,209
• As of 10/10/24 Veterans Care: $3,910,801,318,274
• As of 10/03/24 Veterans Care: $3,898,845,749,995
• As of 10/10/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,700,688,615,498
• As of 10/03/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,684,779,161,504

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

When will our consciences grow so tender that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it. --Eleanor Roosevelt

Famous Last Words: Until now, no one has ever invited me. --Orson Welles who died 10/11/85

..........Then to have your ham and eggs in Carolina.........The Andrew Sisters …..Chattanooga Choo Choo

Ellen Egg was angry about the new standards set up by the Chicken Advocacy Committee. She crossed to the middle of the road and stopped. She was ready to lay it on the line. This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them. --Gracie Allen

May Peace be your shell
And Joy be your center
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh