Warty Jelly ePistle

 Famous First Words: An act to prevent interstate commerce in the products of child labor... --Keating-Owen Act

September is National Mushroom Month. A book about mushrooms is called a FunGuide. / Mushroom taxis go shroom, shroom.

..........Wonder where this world is going to, going to.........Steve Miller Band …..Children of the Future

There cannot be health without peace, and there cannot be peace without health. --Director General Dr Tedros of W.H.O.

It is a gorgeous Friday morning. The cloudless sky is a tight azure that provides the perfect background for barely moving willow branches and still mulberry trees. Birds flit about silently. The loud crows have come and gone. A cardinal sits very red in the very green tree of unknown species. Her yellow beak picks up the sun and shines like a tiny, tiny diamond in the morning sun. 63°F temperatures make the morning ideal for walks and we meet other dogs but no squirrels (must be a good morning to sleep in for some). The breeze is so slight I am not sure whether I am feeling wind against my cheeks or if it is only me moving through the air. Now the sounds of motors revving up and moving down the streets begin to stir the morning into human action. So I return home to the smell of brewing coffee and last night's incense. I fix myself a cup of sweetened, creamed coffee and select a gooey cream filled doughnut and sit down to write to you. What a morning.

Hope your weekend is magic, ePistliers.

FYI of the Week: Warty Jelly is a type of mushroom. Exidia glandulosa It is also sometimes called Witches Butter.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I don't know how to tell my friend that I'm imaginary.

What kind of room has no windows or doors? A Mushroom. / How do you get into a mush room? Ring the Porta-Bella.

..........She spreads her wings and she's free..........Steve Miller Band …..Quicksilver Girl

Trivia Questions: Happy Birthday, Edgar Rice Burroughs !

• ^ Any idea where Edgar was born?
• ^^ How about when Edgar began to publish?
• ^^^ Or when someone began making Tarzan movies?
• ^^^^ How many Tarzan books did Edgar write?
• ^^^^^ When did Edgar die?

Big Hello: Buenos diyas (בואנוס דיאס ) – Ladino** https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

**Ladino: westernized Central American person of predominantly mixed Spanish and indigenous descent. In that sense, ladino is synonymous with mestizo. The word ladino is Spanish (meaning “Latin”), and the ladinos of Central America are not to be confused with those Sephardic Jews who speak the Ladino language. The omniglot website suggests it may be the Sephardic Jews because the greeting is written in the Hebrew alphabet.

Freshly Learned Fact of the Week: When your computer cursor is in the middle of a Hebrew word the left and right directional arrow keys work in the opposite direction (at least in Open Office) because Hebrew is read from right to left; This is true even if the word processor won't save the actual Hebrew characters but changes them to grawlix (see Weird Word of the Week below). Grrr!

The Big Hello section is usually so simple...Learn to say hello...what could be more straightforward?

And I looked up Sephardic too.

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: 38% of librarians have re-gifted ugly yarn to their cats. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

With your jacket potatoes, why don't you serve button mushrooms? / Farmer Fanny grows mushrooms. We know she's a really good person because she has such good morels.

..........All I know is I've got to be free.........Steve Miller Band …..Roll With It

Moonbeam: The road to success is always under construction. --Lily Tomlin

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Can the witches please gather in the woods tonight and make fall happen already. I'm sick of being sad & sweaty, I'm ready to be melancholy & cozy.

Image of the Week: The Dalek who works in the Dillons on 23^rd

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Paula Egan Wright, of Cheyenne, Wyo. Name part of the human body above the neck in 9 letters. Rearrange them to name another part of the human body found below the neck. Only some people have the first body part. Everyone has the second one. What parts of the human body were these?

A mushroom that makes music is known as a decomposer. / When Morris the Mushroom had a day off he went to the salad bar.

..........I jump in my white horse Cadillac..........Steve Miller Band …..Gangster of Love

^ Burroughs was born in Chicago, IL. He was the fourth son of businessman & Civil War vet, George Tyler Burroughs.

'Nother Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Being poor is only romantic in books. --Sidney Sheldon

Almanac: It is Friday, September 1, 2023. The moon was full (Corn Moon) yesterday (8/31) and is in Pisces. It is the International Day of War Tax Resistance. It is also Building and Code Staff Appreciation Day, Chicken Boy's Day, Emma M. Nutt Day, International Day of Awareness for the Dolphins of Taiji, National No Rhyme (Nor Reason) Day, Random Acts of Kindness Day or Be Kind Day, and Save Japan's Dolphins Day.

Among those born on this day were Lydia Sigourney (1791), Elizabeth Harrison (1849), Engelbert Humperdinck (1854), Roger David Casement (1864), Gentle Jim Corbett (1866), and Edgar Rice Burroughs (1875). Also Walter Reuther (1907), Melvin Laird (1922), Vittorio Gassman (1922), Yvonne De Carlo (1922), Rocky Marciano (1923), Ann Richard (1933), Conway Twitty (1933), George Maharis (1938), Lily Tomlin (1939), Barry Gibb (1946), and Gloria Estefan (1957) were born on this day.

On September first the Great Fire of London began (1666), Aaron Burr was acquitted of charges of plotting to set up an empire (1907), the first pullman sleeper car went into service (1859), solar flares were first observed (1859), Lister performed the first antiseptic surgery (1965), Emma Nutt was hired as the first female telephone operator (1878), St. Petersburg became Petrograd (1914), the Keating-Owen Act banned child labor from interstate commerce (1916), Black holes were first treated in the literature (1939), the UN's World Health Organization formed (1948), Pirate Radio Marina began transmitting (1968), Earth's population hit 3 billion (1962), Boz Scaggs joined The Steve Miller Blues Band (1967), Qatar gained independence from Britain (1971), Bobby Fischer beat Boris Spassky for the world chess title (1972), the court ordered Clayton Moore to stop wearing his Lone Ranger mask (1979), and Pioneer flew by Saturn (1979).

Night Sky, 9/1: Just after twilight fades away, look for bright Vega passing near the zenith (if you live in the world's mid-northern latitudes). Vega goes right through your zenith if you're at latitude 39° north: near Baltimore, Kansas City, Lake Tahoe, Sendai, Beijing, Athens, Lisbon. As dawn brightens, catch Venus now rapidly emerging in the east from its conjunction with the Sun. In a telescope or even good binoculars it's a thin crescent, just 11% sunlit. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: At the County Fair

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If work were good for you, the rich would leave none for the

poor. --Haitian proverb --Submitted by 98%

This Week: Saturday, September 2 – International Bacon Day & National Play Outside Day & World Beard Day

Sunday, September 3 – Bowling League Day & Pet Rock Day & Skyscraper Day

Night Sky, 9/3: A late-night telescope session tonight offers the Moon in its interesting waning gibbous phase, with lunar landforms near the terminator casting their shadows in the opposite direction from when the Moon is a thick waxing crescent seen in early evening. Then switch to Jupiter shining right nearby, as shown below. Jupiter's four bright Galilean moons are very roughly the size of our own Moon, but at 1,800 times the distance, they appear in a telescope as hardly more than pinpoints. Jupiter's Great Red Spot should transit the planet's central meridian tonight around 1 am. EDT.

Monday, September 4 – Labor Day & National Wildlife Day & Yard Art Day

Tuesday, September 5 – Be Late For Something Day & International Day of Charity & Jury Rights Day

Wednesday, September 6 – Gold Star Day (1941 – all German Jews over age six were ordered to wear a yellow star on their clothing.)

Night Sky 9/6: Saturn (magnitude +0.4, in dim Aquarius) rises at sunset; it's at opposition this week, on August 26th. In late twilight you'll find Saturn glowing as the brightest thing low in the east-southeast. It's at a fairly good height for telescopic observing by 11 pm. (by which time Fomalhaut is twinkling two fists below it). Saturn is at its highest in the south around 1 am.

Thursday, September 7 – Neither Snow Nor Rain Day & International Day of Clean Air for Blue Skies

Do baby toadstools grow in mushwombs? / Millie Mushroom wasn't stroganoff to enter the weight lifting competition.

..........You open your eyes and love will be easy.........Steve Miller Band …..You've Got the Power

^^ Burroughs' first story was published in 1912; it was about an abandoned English boy raised by apes.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I know how it will end, one of my kids will unplug my life support to charge their phone. --Submitted by RHOZ

Moonbeam: Remember, we're all in this alone. --Lily Tomlin

Video of the Week: The mushroom dance from Fantasia: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJYN1d3f2dc (1:04)

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: A new report from the NYT says that close calls happen more often than we thought with 46 incidents happening just last month. The FAA responded with a statement which was basically, "I know. Right? Crazy". I don't like their plan for this which is to put a bumper sticker on the back of the plane that says: Student Pilot. Please Be Patient --Nagin Farsad Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 8/26/23

In fact, addressing issues of inequality and marginalization is critical for achieving positive health outcomes not only in fragile, conflict-affected and vulnerable settings, but in all societies globally. --WHO Website

Mushrooms have their own internet. They have conferences on Zhroom. / Cameron Campestris was always helpful. He said that's what friends are spore.

..........She said “there isn't anything greater than love..........Steve Miller Band …..You're So Fine

^^^ In 1916 Edgar Rice Burroughs was paid a record $5,000 cash advance on royalties for the film rights of the first Tarzan novel plus five percent of the gross receipts. Tarzan of the Apes went on to take a million dollars at the box office.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Little Known Fact: Before the crowbar was invented, crows simply drank at home. --Submitted by jg of ks

Weird Word of the Week: Grawlix – The “grawlix” is the character or string of characters that often appear in place of profanity – the visual equivalent of bleeping a word. %#&$#@ https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/grawlix

Dragon of the Week: Australia's Thorny Dragon (Moloch horridus)

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Make a handy grip for holding unwieldy objects. If you have difficulty holding pens, silverware, brooms, mops, and rakes, cut a strip of Bubble Wrap, wrap it around the body of the instrument or utensil, and secure it in place with a piece of Scotch Packaging Tape, creating a more convenient grip. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/bubblewrap.html

All mushrooms are edible; Some are only edible once though. / Sorry, mushroom puns are usually in spore taste.

...........When the moon peeks over the mountains..........Steve Miller Band …..Key to the Highway

^^^^ Edgar Rice Burroughs wrote 26 Tarzan books without ever visiting Africa.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Me yelling at a squirrel to get out of the road so it's not squished...is probably the same feeling that my guardian angel has watching me live my life.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Meta Con (1-3, Minneapolis, MN) We bring together thousands of geeks for a three-day celebration of geek culture and nerd life. https://metaconvention.com/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: International Conference on Ubiquitous Computing and Intelligent Information Systems (1-2, Erode, India) Hosted by Shree Venkateshwara Hi-Tech Engineering College. https://10times.com/e1zf-542x-z1rx

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Buck Teeth → Butt Cheek

Mother mushrooms have been known to sing “Mush, little baby, don't say a word” to their little toadstools. / As Larry Lion's Mane fell off the cliff he yelled, “Help, I'm in truffle!”

..........Did you hear the music serenade from the stars..........Steve Miller Band …..Song For Our Ancestors

^^^^^ Burroughs died alone in his Encino home of a heart attack after many health problems on March 19, 1950. He had spent his last hour reading the Sunday comics in bed

Saying of a Jewish Buddha Own Writing of the Week: The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single Oy. https://www.tikkun.org/sayings-of-the-jewish-buddhist/

Quote of the Week: History is never surprising – after it happens. --Robert Heinlein Logic Of Empire

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Living people eat dead mushrooms but living mushrooms eat dead people.

Today's Peace of History, September 1, 1997: Kurdish and British activists blockaded an arms trade exhibition outside London.

Peter Puffball has noticed that no matter how big and tough some humans claim to be, they can't resist poking a puffball. / Ruby Redpine broke up with her boyfriend, Morty Molybdites, because he was so toxic.

..........Got such a long way to go.........Steve Miller Band …..Fanny Mae

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle September 1, 2023. Warty Jelly ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: No matter how cynical you become, it's never enough to keep up. --Lily Tomlin

Cost of War:

• As of 08/31/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $215,587,284,431.
• As of 08/24/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $215,033,691,596.
• As of 08/31/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,161,261,212,729.
• As of 08/24/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,159,714,869,853.
• As of 08/31/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,145,879,434,279.
• As of 08/24/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,145,278,043,991.
• As of 08/31/23 Veterans Care since 2001:$3,227,920,428,812.
• As of 08/24/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $3,216,198,104,825.
• As of 08/31/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,041,383,912,791.
• As of 08/24/23 Military Costs since 2001:$3,040,209,639,616.
• As of 08/31/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,792,035,937,819.
• As of 08/24/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,776,437,386,502.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

WHO’s Constitution recognizes that “the health of all peoples is fundamental to the attainment of peace and security”.

Famous Last Words: I'm stayin' alive. --The Brothers Gibb Stayin' Alive

..........Life's gonna be my pleasure..........Steve Miller Band …..Lucky Man ~~Boz Scaggs was with Steve Miller for 2 albums (Children of the Future and Sailor) All these songs are from those 2 albums.

I'm spored of these mushroom puns. Don't you have mushroom for new material? / Bobby Bolete grew to be three feet tall. They called him the humongous fungus.

May Peace be your foundation

And Joy be your infrastructure

prairie mama

christine

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