Friday, August 4, 2023

sParkling ePistle

Famous First Words: The night they invented Champagne (from Gigi) Thank you, Dom Perignon

It is Homemade Pie Day aka Braham** Pie Day. Pumpkin is the most beautiful pie; it's simply gourdous. / That trick where Babe herds all the sheep into a perfect circle (heads in, tails out) is called the Shepherd's Pi.

** Braham is the Homemade Pie Capital of Minnesota and host to the Braham Pie Festival

..........Little Jack Horner got nothing on me.........Bob Dylan …..Country Pie

I see the world gradually being turned into a wilderness, I hear the ever approaching thunder, which will destroy us too, I can feel the sufferings of millions and yet, if I look up into the heavens, I think that it will all come right, that this cruelty too will end, and that peace and tranquility will return again. --Anne Frank

It is a gray Friday morning. Thick cloud cover blocks out the sun and leaves a slate gray layer with little texture or variation. 77°F temperatures with 89% humidity makes the air thick and heavy. Light wind moves the willow into graceful waving pom poms but barely moves the mulberry. The gray and green is broken by waving yellow sunflowers and the occasional cardinal or robin that stops on the utility wires for a look around. The bird song is silent and there is only the rustling of the leaves to treat the ear. I am sitting at my desk sipping Nuttin But Kisses decaf and watching the morning saunter through my backyard. I take big breaths of coffee steam and let the flavors drift up my nose to entice me towards that first long drink. Ahhh, and now I get to write to you. What more could I want from a morning?

Hope your weekend earns a champagne toast, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: People with multiple personalities should donate one of them to people who don't have one. --Submitted by jm of ks

My husband just shoved a key lime pie in my face and stormed out. I've been desserted. / The first item on my recipe for vegan meat pie is: Pick a fresh vegan...

They called it champagne because expensive was already taken.

..........The day the music died.........Don McLean …..American Pie

Trivia Questions: Happy International Beer Day !

  • ^ Where did beer originate?
  • ^^ What are the origins of modern beer?
  • ^^^ When did beer become a commercial product?
  • ^^^^ Do Europeans really drink warm beer?
  • ^^^^^ How much beer does the average US citizen drink?

Big Hello: !kao - !Kung San aka Ju (Namibia, Botswana, Angola) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I will rise again, like a phoenix that tripped over an extension cord, hurt its shoulder, and then awkwardly stood up.

Image of the Week: Added a new one this week

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: Ranganathan's original 2nd law: A librarian on vacation shall photograph every library they find. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

A whiskey butterscotch praline pie walked into a bar. The barkeeper said, “We don't serve food here,” / I was held captive by French-Canadian terrorists...they forced me to eat hundreds of meat pies. It was tourtière.

I prefer my champagne like I prefer my jokes – bubbly.

..........Nothing tastes better, wet, salty and dry.........Andie MacDowell …..Pie Song from Michael

Moonbeam: There is no real wealth but the labor of man. --Percy Bysshe Shelley

Question of the Week: Is that cabin you keep mumbling about in your sleep real? --Questions for your new squeeze

Absolute Irrelevance of the Week: I used to make fun of the Big Ten because they had 11 schools (now they have even more, I think). Then the Big XII (formerly the Big 8) got down to ten schools and I apologized to the Big Ten and made fun of the Big XII – (Don't go to those schools, they don't even teach you to count.) Now XII is adding 4 more schools to make 14. (7/1/25 – BYU, Houston U, U Central Florida, and Cincinnati U). Way back when they weren't going to be the Big 8, I thought they should have named it the Great Plains Conference – but when they added West Virginia, that fell apart. Now, I hear, Colorado wants to come back. The Big XII – 15 schools in search of a math professor. {In Salt Lake City they sell t-shirts that say My Favorite Team Is Whoever Is Playing BYU.}

Puzzle of the Week: Name a classic TV show in two words, in which the respective words rhyme with the first and last names of a famous writer - four letters in the first name, five letters in the last name. Who is it? --NPR Puzzle Sunday 7/29

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Ghosts sit around the campfire and tell Stephen King stories. --Submitted by bc of tx

I don't care what you say, the cactus pie was a succulent dessert. / Know how all those blueberries got to the bakery? The Pie Piper

I tried to make a champagne cake, but it didn't rise to the occasion.

..........You will eat, bye and bye.........Joe Hill …..Pie In The Sky

^ The Sumerians discovered beer. There are some theories that beer brewing happened at Godin Tepe settlement (now in modern-day Iran) as early as 10,000 BCE when agriculture developed in the region. The people who lived in the land between the Euphrates and Tigris rivers considered beer a very important part of their diet. They called it “the divine drink” because of its intoxicating effect.

Almanac: It is Friday, August 4, 2023. The moon was full (Sturgeon) last Tuesday (8/1) and is in Pisces. It is Coast Guard Day, National Chocolate Chip Day, Single Working Women's Day, and Social Security Day. Because it is the first Friday it is Braham Pie Day aka Homemade Pie Day, and International Beer Day, Tomboy Tools Day, and Twin Days.

Among those born on this day were Nicolas-Jacque Conte (1755), Percy Bysshe Shelley (1792), Louis Armstrong (1901), the queen mum (1900), Michael J McCulley (1943), Richard Belzer (1944), Billy Bob Thornton (1955), and Roger Clemens (1962).

On August fourth a supernova was seen in Cassiopeia (1181), Dom Perignon invented champagne (1693), plans for the city of Chicago were laid out (1830), Lizzie Borden was arrested (1892), US bought the Virgin Islands from Denmark ($25 million, 1916), US marines left Nicaragua (1925), the Peace Bridge between the US and Canada opened (1927), Anne Frank was arrested (1944), a 5 day southern filibuster succeeded in maintaining poll taxes (1948), the USAF set an air speed record of 2,150 mph (1960), Stargell hit the first ever home run outside of Dodger Stadium (1969), Jim Morrison was arrested for public drunkenness (1970), Oliver North was assigned to White House duty (1981), Carter established the Department of Energy (1977), the Republic of Upper Volta became Burkina Faso (1984), and the 26th Olympic Games closed in Atlanta (1996).

Night Sky, 8/4: The fourth brightest star near the Summer Triangle, if you'd like to turn it into a quadrilateral, is Rasalhague, the head of Ophiuchus, magnitude 2.1. Face south soon after dark. You'll find Rasalhague about equally far to the right of Altair and lower right of Vega. Altair is currently the Summer Triangle's lowest star. Vega, nearly overhead, is its brightest. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Boys in a low-rider hammock

This Week: Saturday, August 5 – National Clown Day & National Underwear Day

Sunday, August 6 – Hiroshima Day

Monday, August 7 – Lighthouse Day & Particularly Preposterous Packaging Day

Night Sky, 8/7: The Big Dipper hangs diagonally in the northwest after dark. From its midpoint, look to the right to find Polaris (not very bright) glimmering due north as always. Polaris is the end of the Little Dipper's handle. The only other Little Dipper stars that are even modestly bright are the two forming the outer end of its bowl: 2nd-magnitude Kochab and 3rd-magnitude Pherkad. On August evenings you'll find them to Polaris's upper left (by about a fist and a half). They're called the Guardians of the Pole, since they ceaselessly circle around Polaris throughout the night and throughout the year.

Tuesday, August 8 – Dalek Day & International Cat Day & National Pickleball Day

Wednesday, August 9 – Book Lovers Day & International Day of the World's Indigenous People

Night Sky, 8/9: Saturn: (magnitude +0.7, in dim Aquarius) rises in late twilight. It's highest in the south, and sharpest and steadiest in a telescope, in the couple hours before dawn.

Thursday, August 10 – Paul Bunyan Day & S'mores Day & World Lion Day

When it was time for Ghost Gwen to cook she served booberry pie with I scream. / Yoda went to the bakery but was told they had just sold the last pie. “Dough or Doughnut. There is no pie.”

Champagne is the perfect accessory to any outfit.

..........And let's have another piece of pie.........The Modernaires …..Let's Have Another Cup Of Coffee

^^ Around 1000 AD, people started using hops in the brewing process. This refined its taste by making it much less bitter and gave us the beer as we know it today. Usage of hops in beer production started spreading across Europe.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: After you Shenan once, you will likely Shenanigan. --The Laughing Librarian

Moonbeam: The soul's joy lies in doing. --Percy Bysshe Shelley

Video of the Week: The Night They Invented Champagne Leslie Caron and Louis Jordan (2:13) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9J6G_rdSDI

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: On Musk changing "twitter" to "x": We must bid adeiu to the bird --Elon Musk It's now official, x marks the spot where twitter went bankrupt. The good news is that it's a perfect excuse for all perverts at work. "I swear. I wasn't trying to look at the website. I was just trying to go to Twitter three times in a row." --Karen Chi Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 7/29/23

Human greatness does not lie in wealth or power but in character and goodness. --Anne Frank

Dancing pies favor Lemon Merengue. / When the pie complained to the chef that it needed more filling, the chef suggested an appointment with the dentist.

The Champagne Diet – gluten free, dairy free, fat free

..........Yoddle-liddy-yum-yum, my, oh my..........Dolly Parton …..Berry Pie

^^^ In the 13th century AD, beer was finally produced commercially in Germany, England, and Austria. The German brewers soon set the standard for most beer makers in Europe. Their beer was of the highest quality, particularly because it was really cold and had a better taste.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Catholic Priests should storm Area 51 so it would be Aliens vs Predators. --Submitted by LaughingInDisbelief

Weird Word of the Week: Guddling – a method of fishing that requires only the bare hands. Trout tickling, trout noodling are other names for this activity. http://www.worldwidewords.org/weirdwords/ww-gud1.htm

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Strain the fat from broth. Strain the broth through a sheet of Bounty Paper Towels. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/bounty2.html

What sneaks around the kitchen on Christmas Eve? Mince pies. / You can make a gold pie with 14 carrots.

There comes a time in every woman's life when the only thing that helps is a glass of champagne. --Bette Davis

...........You're such a tasty hunk of pastry.........Ella Fitzgerald …..Sugar Pie

^^^^ In fact, Europeans prefer their beer at cellar temperature which is typically between 50-55 degreesFahrenheit. Warm beer is popular at German beer festivals. This temperature range allows for the flavors and aromas of the beer to be fully appreciated without being too cold or too warm.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: This isn't a robbery, I just need you to find the 11,780 dollars I need to pay my bills. https://www.facebook.com/PatheticHilarious

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: JoMoCon (5th, Joplin, MO) ...a Joplin, MO based convention for any and all... https://www.jomocon.org/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: Black Hat USA 2023 (5-8, Las Vegas, NV) 100 selected Briefings, dozens of open-source tool demos in Arsenal https://www.blackhat.com/us-23/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Get Smart → Bret Harte

I had a shepherd's pie for lunch today. He sure was mad. / Chef Cheryl made up so many new kinds of pies and pie fillings that they called her the Pieoneer.

Come quickly, I am tasting the stars. --Dom Perignon

..........Makes your eyes light up, your tummy say “howdy”.........Dinah Shore …..Shoo Fly Pie and Apple Pan Dowdy

^^^^^ Overall U.S. beer consumption per adult age 21 and over is around 28.2 gallons per person, per year. Breaking these numbers down further, the average adult over the age of 21 is consuming about 10 ounces per day, or roughly one six pack per week.

Sayings of the Jewish Buddha of the Week: Drink tea and nourish life; with the first sip, joy; with the second sip, satisfaction; with the third sip, peace; with the fourth, a Danish.

Quote of the Week: The vehicle explodes, literally explodes, off the pad. The simulator shakes you a little bit, but the actual liftoff shakes your entire body and soul. --Michael McCulley

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you can't afford rent, that's your fault for living in a city. Maybe if you lived in an open field or perhaps some kind of bog.

Today's Peace of History, August 4, 1985: Peace Ribbons made by thousands of women were wrapped around the U.S. Pentagon, the White House, and the Capitol. Twenty thousand people participated, and the 27,000 panels making up the ribbon stretched for 15 miles.

If I make a meat pie with snake meat can I call it Piethon? / I bought a lemon chiffon pie for dessert but I dropped it on the way up the stairs. Now it's between 3 and 4.

Too much of anything is bad, but too much Champagne is just right. --F Scott Fitzgerald

..........We tied our ribbons to the fire escape.........Patty Griffin …..Making Pies

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle August 4, 2023, sParkling ePistle Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: War is the statesman's game, the priest's delight, the lawyer's jest, the hired assassin's trade. --Percy Bysshe Shelley

  • Cost of War:
  • As of 08/03/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $213,357,343,468.
  • As of 07/27/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $212,791,285,233.
  • As of 08/03/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,155,032,696,013.
  • As of 07/27/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,153,451,723,374.
  • As of 08/03/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,143,457,075,951.
  • As of 07/27/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,142,842,394,546.
  • As of 08/03/23 Veterans Care since 2001:$3,180,705,643,635.
  • As of 07/27/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $3,168,722,374,905.
  • As of 08/03/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,036,654,664,633.
  • As of 07/27/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,035,545,381,593.
  • As of 08/03/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,729,209,881,851.
  • As of 07/27/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,713,265,093,871.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart. --Anne Frank

Famous Last Words: Gave her father forty-one. --Lizzie Borden doggerel

..........We walked and wheeled from the battlefield.........Joan Baez …..Where's My Apple Pie

Did you know a pork pie in Aruba cost $1.50? A cheese and spinach pie will cost you $2/60 in Barbados. An apple pie is only $1.30 in Jamaica whereas a pecan pie will set you back $3.50 in Grenada. And those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

May your Peace be light and fluffy

And your Joy be sweet and juicy

prairie mama

christine



Last Laugh:


No comments:

Post a Comment