Famous First Words: Strike three, ball four --Damn Yankees Act1 : Scene 1
April was a hard month for us... We were so poor we thought teachers were rich. / ...we couldn't afford Special K so we had to eat ordinary K. / When I was a kid we were very rich because my dad invested in Lifesavers. He made a mint. / I had a cousin who was a marine biologist. He was very whale-thy.
..........I'm bound to learn to fly..........Tammy Wynette …..'Til I Get It Right
The bourgeoisie has torn away from the family its sentimental veil and has reduced the family relation into a mere money relation. --Karl Marx
It is a gray Friday morning. The sky is blotched with light slate and almost white splotches. Here and there I can see or, perhaps, imagine the sun trying to shine through and failing. 59°F is a lovely spring temperature but the breeze and the damp suggest jackets and even hats. The dangling branches of the willow are waving lazily as are the shorter, newer trees. A single dog barks from behind one of the fences meant to keep us all privately in our own places. Now and again a bird flies by looking like it has purpose and plans. The dog has stopped his conversation and the wind has also stopped momentarily. It is so quiet with only the hum of the computer in my ear. Ah, I pick up my cup and inhale the rich creamy chocolaty steam. Puck snores. And I raise my cup to you, dear reader, have a great day!
May your weekend be Cinco veces Glorious, ePistliers
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It was a sad and disappointing day when I discovered my Universal Remote Control did not, in fact, control the Universe. (not even remotely.) --Neil deGrasse Tyson --Submitted by ff of ks
Florida: Trashy if you're poor, classy if you're rich. / We were so rich we owned Bose music systems and assumed the poor had Sony. Turns out those were just stereotypes. / We were so poor we used to leave the front door open hoping a thief would come in and drop something. /...we couldn't afford punchlines for our jokes.
..........And then I know just when to dream.........Rex Goh and Air Supply …..Making Love Out Of Nothing At All
Trivia Questions: Happy International Roller Derby Day!
- ^ What are the positions on a roller derby team?
- ^^ How is roller derby scored?
- ^^^ Why do the helmet covers indicate?
- ^^^^ What is “Rink Rash”?
- ^^^^^ How popular is roller derby?
Big Hello: Witéj – Kashubian (Poland) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest I Read of the Week: There is no pleasure in having nothing to do. The fun is from having lots to do and not doing it. --Submitted by PsyDe
Image of the Week: The NFL draft in KC --a preliminary rendering
Fake Library Statistics of the Week: 75% of librarians might say “Good Morning” but only 15% mean it. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats
We were so poor, one night burglars broke in and couldn't find anything to steal; so they woke us up to make fun of us. / ...the tooth fairy left us food stamps. / We were so rich that when my parents tickled my baby brother they said, “Gucci, Gucci, Gucci ”. / … we brushed our teeth with Decadent.
..........Freedom fighters sent out to the sun.........Bill Ward with Black Sabbath …..Into The Void
Moonbeam: People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use. --Soren Kierkegaard
Question of the Week: Whose turn is it?
Puzzle of the Week: From listener Bob Bickel, of Severna Park, Md. Think of a five-letter word for things a
lot of people complain about. Add a letter and rearrange the result to get an example of these things. Then add one more letter and rearrange to get a remedy for these things. Five, six, and seven letters, respectively. What words are these?
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It is easier for a removable bra cup to be inserted through the tiny hole and placed in the correct shape than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. --Submitted by MMS
My dad ran the garbage collection for the mob so we were filthy rich. / We were so rich that after his heart attack, my dad rode to the hospital in an ambulenciaga. We were so poor I had to bathe in the spring. When the money got better, I bathed in the fall too. / ...a burglar broke into our house and all he got was practice.
..........Oh, thunder only happens when it's raining.........Billy Burnette and Fleetwood Mac …..Dreams
^ The positions are 1) Jammer – laps the opposing team members 2) Blockers 1) Pivot – captain who can act as a Jammer in a jam.
Almanac: It is Friday, May 5, 2023. The moon becomes full (Flower) today and is in Scorpio. It is National Cartoonists Day, Childhood Stroke Awareness Day, Cinco de Mayo, International Day of The Midwife, International Roller Derby Day, National Astronaut Day, National Hoagie Day, National Military Spouse Appreciation Day, National Totally Chipotle Day, Revenge of the Fifth (Star Wars Sith), Tuba Day, and World Password Day. Because it is the first Friday in May it is also International Space Day.
Among those born on this day were Philippe Quinault (1635), Soren Kierkegaard (1813), Karl Marx (1818), Guggenheim de Montijo y de Guzman (1826), Henryk Sienkiewicz (1846), Nellie Bly (Elizabeth Cochran Seaman, 1867), Charles Bender (1883), Christopher Morley (1890), Spencer Tracy (1900), James Beard (1903), Rex Harrison (Reginald Carey, 1908), Tyrone Power (1913), Ann B David (1926), Pat Carroll (1927), Tammy Wynette (1942), John Rhys-Davies (1944), Bill Ward (Black Sabbath, 1948), Rex Goh (Air Supply, 1951), Billy Burnette (Fleetwood Mac, 1953), and Peter Erskine (Weather Report, 1954).
On May fifth the second Council of Constantinople opened (553), a peace treaty between Russia and Prussia was signed (1762), the American Medical Association was organized (1847), Carnegie Hall opened (Tchaikovsky conducting, 1891), Billboard began publishing (1900), the US invaded the Dominican Republic (1916), Sinclair Lewis refused the Pulitzer Prize (Arrowsmith, 1926), Gandhi was freed from prison (1944), Damn Yankees opened (1955), US tested a nuclear bomb at Enwetak (1958), the Iran-Contra hearings began (1987), and there was a conjunction of the Sun, Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, and the Moon (2000).
Night Sky, 5/5: Eta Aquariid Meteor Shower. This shower favors the southern hemisphere so it appears low in the sky for northerly latitudes. Predawn is best. Has thrown as many as 50 falling stars per hour. Information AND Penumbral Lunar Eclipse: Visible in almost the entire world except here. They'll see it in Europe, Asia, Australia, Africa, Pacific, Atlantic, Indian Ocean, and Antarctica. (There will be another one in October that we can see) https://www.timeanddate.com/eclipse/2023
Fraternal Picture of the Week: “Walt Whitman once said, ‘I see great things in baseball. It’s our game, the American game. It will repair our losses and be a blessing to us.’ You could look it up. --Annie Savoy Bull Durham (not Whitman)
This Week: Saturday, May 6 – Coronation Day & Kentucky Derby Day & Mariachi Day
Sunday, May 7 – Beaufort Scale Day & Lemonade Day & World Laughter Day
Night Sky, 5/7: Venus (mag -4.3) is visible above the western horizon in Taurus. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Monday, May 8 – No Socks Day & Student Nurse Day & World Red Cross/Crescent Day
Tuesday, May 9 – Alphabet Magnet Day & National Sleepover Day
Wednesday, May 10 – Clean Your Room Day & School Nurse Day
Night Sky, 5/10: Mars (mag 1.5) is high in the western sky in Gemini
Thursday, May 11 – Eat What You Want Day & Root Canal Appreciation Day
We were so poor we couldn't afford electricity; we had to watch tv by candle light. / ...ducks used to throw bread at us. / My mother got rich playing pool. She's a billiardnaire. / My brother made his money with a dating app for old rich white guys. It's call “22 and Me”.
..........Things ain't cooking in my kitchen.........Peter Erskine with Weather Report …..Birdland
^^ Points are awarded by the jammer passing opposing team members.
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Exhaustipated: (adj) Too tired to give a shit. --Submitted by Philosophy Matters
Moonbeam: It is not wise to be wiser than is necessary. --Philippe Quinault
Video of the Week: Roy Zimmerman and friends in (Tragedy tomorrow) Hannity Tonight https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJIV2rOlUdo Roy is wearing a t-shirt that says Fox News is elder abuse.
Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: Biden will be 86 at the end of his second term. But when you average that with his approval rating, it's like 50. And it's true that this video features Kamala Harris a lot. The Biden administration is doing its best to promote her, which is a lot like selling an airplane by talking about the parachutes. --Peter Sagal Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 4/29/23
The hand-mill gives you society with the feudal lord; the steam-mill society with the industrial capitalist. --Karl Marx
My aunt was so rich she bought a kid to play with her dog. / We were so rich our Lemonade stand sold Chateau Lafite Rothschild (1988). / We were so poor when I was in high school my dad gave me an air guitar for Christmas. / ...we had to play Dungeons OR Dragons.
..........Cause after all he's just a man..........Tammy Wynette …..Stand By Your Man
^^^ There are 2 different helmet covers: stars for the jammer and stripes for the pivot.
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Kansans always breathe a sigh of relief when the legislature adjourns... --Submitted by cc of ks https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
Weird Word of the Week: Rawky (pronounced rocky) – cold, foggy, damp https://wordsmith.org/words/rawky.html
Dragon of the Week: Longshan aka Lungshan Temple in Taiwan
In college my roommates and I were so poor we couldn't pay the electric bill. Those were my darkest days. / ...we couldn't pay the church for Grace's exorcism and they repossessed her. / My mom was rich, She was a juggler and knew how to balance a checkbook. / We were so rich, mom used to bury money in the garden to make the soil rich.
...........Generals gathered in their masses........Bill Ward with Black Sabbath …..War Pigs
^^^^ Rink Rash is when a skater falls and skins her knee.
Penultimate
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week:
I may be mentally unstable but at least I don't own a
pair of crocs.
--Submitted by RHOZ
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: 34th Annual DemiCon (5-7, Des Moines) --an interactive adventure with all sorts of amazing ways to be involved. https://demicon.org/34/
Actual Science Conference of the Week: Star East 2023 – IT & Technology (4/10-5/5, Orlando, FL) Software Testing Tools and Services https://www.cantonfair.net/event/22881-star-east
Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Pains → Sprain → Aspirin
We were so rich I had an MP4. / I'm a data manager for a large firm. I'm not really rich but I have a lot to cache. / We were so poor that all we had for toilet paper was a calendar. Now those days are behind me. / ..we turn our jeans inside out just to get another month's wear out of 'em.
..........Can you hear me calling out your name.........Billy Burnette and Fleetwood Mac …..Everywhere
^^^^^ There are over 1,200 amateur roller derby leagues worldwide.
My Own Writing of the Week: I never cared for sex on LSD. There was too much going on. When I'm making love I want all my attention right there in my cunt and in my mouth. I don't want to space out watching the flowers on the comforter move. But, late in the evening when you're gliding down and you smoke a little weed to slow yourself even more so you're kind of floating between trippy and not, sensation is still intense but the mind is not so, love can be magical.
Drinking has never made me lucky. There was a potential Young Apollo who stopped by my house on St. Patrick's Day with a fifth of good Irish Whiskey that someone had left in his truck. But I'm so little a drinker I wasn't able to keep up at all and kept asking if people diluted this with other stuff like coke or orange juice. Finally, he took the rest of his bottle and went off to find someone who liked the stuff. I hope he ended up lucky and in love.
I'm not opposed to alcohol. There was that young man who wore suits and taught me about shots of cheap Scotch but my second husband, Bruce, taught me to drink good Scotch. Each year on the anniversary of the dispersal of his ashes, people gather and drink good Scotch aged for many years, and we all tell Bruce stories.
I learned to drink Tequila at lesbian parties. Salt, Liquor, Lemon!! Tequila and weed make an excellent combination. They were usually available in the kitchen for a pleasant break. Then we would dance all night. I don't ever remember a hangover.
There was a timid young woman who fascinated me and I tried wine to help her relax but she just got sick and threw up. She was a college student from a farm outside a very small town. Perhaps it was because I was female, perhaps I was inept, but eventually I moved on without ever properly satisfying the lady. She was kind of tall and had wonderful full eyebrows that she used well. But she was so shy. She couldn't relax and I didn't know what to do to help. There have been failures.
Big Mama and I used to drink strawberry daiquiris and play cards on Sunday nights. Sometimes when I was running the Business & Economics Reading Room and it was a new semester and there was lots of work and lots of questions and lots of stress, I would take bloody-marys to work in a thermos. This would go on for a couple of weeks and just about the time I said to myself, "Hey, you're taking liquor to work - every day! Is this a problem?" The semester would settle down and I would stop.
I did belong to a group that called themselves the Women's Thursday Night Drinking Club. It was a Consciousness Raising Group that grew up. That was certainly a pleasant crowd. I'd raise a glass to them this very day!
Techniques from Always Surrender by Christine Smith
Quote of the Week: To be wealthy and honored in an unjust society is a disgrace. --Confucius
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Falcons live to be 12-15 years old. So all falcons alive today were born in the 21st century. They are millennial falcons. --Submitted by bc of ex
Today's Peace of History, May 5, 1983: Over 1,000,000 Sicilians, 1/5 of the island's population, signed a petition against the deployment of more than 100 US cruise missiles at the Comiso Air Base.
We were so poor we unplugged the clocks when we went to bed. / ...we were so poor we often had Hamburger Helper for supper – without the hamburger. / I won a million dollars in the lottery. I decided to give a quarter of it to charity. Now I have $999,999.75. / By the way, rich people do have a sense of humor. But they feel that it, like their money, should not be shared with poor people.
..........Baby, I'd give you my world.........Billy Burnette and Fleetwood Mac …..Go Your Own Way
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle May 5, 2023, eNriched ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.
Moonbeam: "There is absolutely no substitute for the best. Good food cannot be made of inferior ingredients masked with high flavor. It is true thrift to use the best ingredients available and to waste nothing." --James Beard
Cost of War:
- As of 05/04/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $206,128,355,218.
- As of 04/27/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $205,560,144,658.
- As of 05/04/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,134,841,355,506.
- As of 04/27/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,133,254,306,406.
- As of 05/04/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,135,604,999,050.
- As of 04/27/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,134,987,817,248.
- As of 05/04/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $3,027,650,298,461.
- As of 04/27/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $3,015,620,222,359.
- As of 05/04/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,021,324,140,084.
- As of 04/27/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,020,119,176,909.
- As of 05/04/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,525,550,507,492.
- As of 04/27/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,509,543,226,867.
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
The pay of the common soldier is also reduced to a minimum — determined purely by the production costs necessary to procure him. But he exchanges the performance of his services not for capital, but for the revenue of the state. --Karl Marx
Famous Last Words: ... and if he is a monk or lay person, let him be anathema. --Second Council of Constantinople
..........There's nothing left to say.........Rex Goh and Air Supply …..Goodbye
We were so rich, we had ice cubes in the shape of dollar signs. / ...we had 14 bathrooms in our house. / We were so poor we couldn't pay attention. / ...that if they were selling steamboats for a dollar, all we could do is run around yelling, “Ain't that cheap?” / At the end of the day it doesn't make any difference if you're rich or poor, it still night.
May Peace ease your mind
And Joy ease your relationships
prairie mama
christine
Last Laugh: Happy National Cartoonist Day
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