Worldly ePistle

Famous First Words: I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness... Allen Ginsberg Howl

March is International Mirth Month ! From Kenya: Your family is so stupid they give chickens hot water so they'll lay boiled eggs. / From Macedonia: Only 20% of Macedonians live in stress and revolt. The other 80% live in Australia, the US, Canada, Germany, Sweden, the UK...

..........spooned such a spoon.........Danny Kaye and Karolyn Grimes …..No Two People

Love is the purest form of a soul at peace. --Matthew Donnelly

Wow, long time so see or at least it seems that way. It is a rainy Friday morning. The rain is gentle and spotty and appreciated by soil and wildlife and humans, but not much by Puck. I have traveled this morning and I've finished my errands and fixed my cup of steaming coffee. The sky is an untextured gray that merely hides the sun. There is not enough wind to blow even the willow branches around. 39°F stops the predicted snow mix from forming and allows me to think it is warmer than it really is. Grass is greening up here and there in patches and clumps. Crocus can be seen also in small bunches. Birds, however, are silent this morning; perhaps they're sleeping in and enjoying the sound of raindrops on surfaces. I hear voices in the other room and the tick tick tick of a solar powered bobble-head snowman in the window. Oh, and Puck's occasional snorts and snores I hear them too. I raise my mug (this one is Zen-O Portable Oxygen Concentrator) of creamy, bitter sweet decaf to you. Hope your weekend includes a million laughs, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you aren't in over your head how do you know how tall you are? T S Eliot

From Germany: Two planets meet. The first asks: "So, how are you?" The second answers: "Well, I'm sick, I've got Homo Sapiens." The first replies: "Oh, I know that one. No worries, it'll pass." / From the USA: And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.” But John came fifth, and won a toaster.

..........Give them a twist, a flick of the wrist..........Danny Kaye …..I've Got A Lovely Bunch Of Coconuts

Trivia Questions: Happy One Hundredth birthday to Time Magazine.

• ^ Do you have any idea who appeared on the very first (1923) Time Magazine cover?
• ^^ Until March 2020 how often was Time published?
• ^^^ Do you know which of the Time editors was a member of the American Communist Party?
• ^^^^ Has every US President or President-elect since 1927 been named Man of the Year?
• ^^^^^ Who has appeared the most times on the Time 100 list of most influential people in the world during the first decade of the 21^st Century?

Big Hello: Halo - Javanese https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Doing a Reverse Lent where I pick up a new vice to get hooked on for the next 40 days. Taking suggestions --Submitted by MMS

Image of the Week: Lawrence's own Mardi Gras Parade 2023 ~~yes, that's a tuba

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: 14% of librarians got their MLS by trading it for their sense of humor. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

From Brazil: Do you know the joke of “no me neither”? No. Me neither. / From New Zealand: What did one kiwi statue say to the other kiwi statue? Stat'chu, bro?

..........I proudly was loudly forlorn..........Danny Kaye …..Maladjusted Jester

Moonbeam: Justice is the sum of all moral duty. --William Godwin

Meditation of the Week: Is mind (aka spirit, reason, will) the ultimate foundation of all reality? --Brought to you by Idealism

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Elaine Elinson, of San Francisco. Name a tree. In the very middle of the word insert a homophone of another tree. The result will be a new word describing what everyone wants to be. What is it? NPR Sunday Puzzle 2/26/23

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: As far as I'm concerned the perfect bra is a sweatshirt. --Maxine. ~~They have let women design women's clothes for over a hundred years now and we still don't have a comfortable bra and can be put on without gymnastic gyrations. Maybe there is no such thing as a comfortable bra.

From Norway: Two whales are sitting in a bar. One of them suddenly says, “Mmmwaamm!” The second one looks over at her and says, “Wow, you're really drunk. / From the UK: A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The driver says, “Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen.” The woman stalks off to the rear of the bus and sits down. She turns to the man sitting next to her and says, “The driver just insulted me.” The man says, “You go and give him a telling off. I'll hold your monkey for you.”

..........Bingo, bangle, bungle, he's so happy in the jungle.........Danny Kaye …..Civilization (Bongo, Bongo, Bongo)

^ The first Time cover featured politician Joseph G Cannon, who had served as Speaker of the House from 1903 to 1911.

Almanac: It is Friday, March 3, 2023. The moon will be full (worm) on 3/7 and is in Cancer. The UN has declared this World Wildlife Day (A/RES/68/281). It is also I Want You To Be Happy Day, International Ear Care Day, National Mulled Wine Day, National Anthem Day, Princess Day, and What If Cats and Dogs Had Opposable Thumbs Day. Because it is the first Friday it is Dress in Blue Day, Employee Appreciation Day, and World Day of Prayer. Finally because it is the first weekend it is National Days of Unplugging.

Among those born on this day were William Godwin (1756), Sophia Hawthorne (1809), George Pullman (1831), Georg Cantor (1845), Alexander Graham Bell (1847), Vincent van Gogh (1853), William Green (1873), Jean Harlow (Harlean Carpentier, 1911), Arthur Kornberg (1918), Allen Ginsberg (1921), Junior Parker (1927), Dave Dudley (1928), Vladimir Kovolyonok (1942), Dave Amato (1953), Jackie Joyner-Kersee (1962), Herschel Walker (1962), and Tone-Loc (1966).

On March third the US mint was established (1791), Haydn's 101st Symphony premiered (1784), the Missouri Compromise passed allowing slavery in MO (1820), Massachusetts passed a child labor law regulating working hours (1842), Congress increased the Supreme Court membership from 7 to 9 (1837), Florida became the 27th state (1845), the Post Office Department was authorized to issue postage stamps (1847), Alexander II abolished serfdom in Russia (1861), the Idaho Territory was formed (1863), the federal civil service system was established (1871), Bizet's Carmen premiered (1875), the first female lawyer argued before the US Supreme Court (1879), Anne Sullivan began teaching Helen Keller (1887), Congress created the Office of Superintendent of Immigration (1891), Congress created the US Courts of Appeal (1891), the National Advisory Committee for Aeronautics (NASA forerunner) was created (1915), Time magazine published its first issue (1923), Mount Rushmore was dedicated (1933), Puerto Rico approved their first self-written constitution (1952), Elvis first appeared on television (1955), Morocco gained independence (1956), Apollo 9 launched (1969), and George Foreman KO-ed Ken Norton (1974).

Night Sky, 3/3: Venus is above Jupiter at dusk. They're now 2° apart. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: The boys explore the little blue bag

This Week: Saturday, March 4 – March Forth – Do Something Day & Marching Music Day & National Grammar Day

Sunday, March 5 – Mars Day & Namesake Day & National Pasty Day

Night Sky, 3/5: Now the Moon, only a day and a half from full, shines between Regulus and Gamma Leonis. Moonlight too bright for them? Binoculars will help. The stars are about 4° and 4½° from the center of the Moon, respectively, less than the width of a typical binocular's field of view.

Monday, March 6 – Purim begins & World Tennis Day & Fun Facts About Names Day

Tuesday, March 7 – National Be Heard Day & Peace Corps Day & Unique Names Day

Wednesday, March 8 – Day for Women's Rights & International Peace Day & Girls Write Now Day

Night Sky, 3/8: Mars, near the horns of Taurus, shines very high toward the southwest in late dusk, almost overhead. It moves lower toward the west as evening grows late.

Thursday, March 9 – Get Over It Day & Name-tag Day & Panic Day

From Finland: Which traffic sign allows you to make a U-turn on a highway in Finland? You are approaching the Russian Border. / From Italy: What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

..........Wish on the moon.........Danny Kaye …..Happy Times

^^ "Time" was originally a weekly news magazine - the first such created in America. In 2007, the magazine shifted its publication schedule so that the issues hit newsstands on Fridays. However, declining sales in the early 21st century led to a decision to publish it every two weeks instead, with effect from March 2020. ~~I found this fact more shocking than the communist editor thing. How could I have missed Time going biweekly?

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm just a mom standing in my teen's room looking for forks. -Submitted by INRITH

Moonbeam: “The one thing every athlete wants and needs is somebody who's as motivated and committed as she is. Someone who's willing to work hard along with her.” ―Jackie Joyner-Kersee

Video of the Week: Allen Ginsberg reading A Supermarket In California (3:17) Click Here

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: On October 27, 2012, Drew Carey filled in for Wait Wait host, Peter Sagal and started off the show by thanking them for giving him the chance to ruin another beloved American Game Show. ~~This week's edition was the 25^th anniversary of Wait Wait Don't Tell Me

Stop being offended by a Facebook post, by a piece of art, by people displaying affection, by what someone said to you. Be offended by war, poverty, greed, and injustice. --Sue Fitzmaurice

From Spain: A man enters a store and says, “15 litres of wine please.” “Did you bring a container for this?” “You're speaking to it.” / From Germany: “Excuse me, Waiter, this coffee is cold.” “Thanks for telling me. Iced coffee is one Euro more. I'll make the change.”

..........Things you would not do at home come naturally on the floor..........Danny Kaye …..The Best Things Happen While You're Dancing

^^^ Whittaker Chambers was born and raised in the Eastern United States (Pennsylvania and New York). He joined the Communist Party when he was a young man in the mid-1920s and worked as a spy for the Soviet Union in the early 1930s. He gradually grew unsatisfied with the Communist Party however, due in part to the party's issue with his family (the party disapproved of his wife, who was a pacifist, and hadn't wanted him to settle down and have kids), his growing disgust with Joseph Stalin and the Great Purge taking place in the USSR, and finally out of fear for his own life, as some of his spy friends had gotten themselves murdered. Chambers broke all ties with the Communist Party in 1938 and went into hiding for a while. He joined the staff of "Time" magazine in 1939 as a book and film critic.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The real torture wasn't that Sisyphus has to roll the rock up the hill for eternity, it was that Zeus kept telling him that if he worked hard and applied himself, one day he might be able to pay off his student loans. --Submitted by ma of md

Weird Word of the Week: Yuhangyuan – Universe travel worker (Chinese) http://www.worldwidewords.org/turnsofphrase/tp-yuh1.htm

Dragon of the Week: The Dragon Boat Temple along the Mekong in Thailand --Submitted by vr of th

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Prevent thread from tangling. Run a threaded needle through a sheet of Bounce to eliminate the static cling on the thread before sewing https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/bounce.html

From Mexico: What did the green grape say to the purple grape? “Oh, my God, breathe”. / From China: “A couple was out to dinner when the wife suddenly called out: ‘Oh dear! I forgot to turn off the gas! There could be a fire!’ The husband comforted her and said: ‘It’s okay, in any case I also forgot to turn off the water faucet.’”

...........But in tight places we think and we act as one.........Danny Kaye and Bing Crosby …..Sisters

^^^^ Most of the 20th century US Presidents since 1927 were indeed named Man of the Year, with three exceptions. Calvin Coolidge was the President when the first Man of the Year was named (Charles Lindbergh, 1927) and did not receive the title during the remainder of his term. The next president (1929-1933) was Herbert Hoover, and he was never Man of the Year either. Gerald Ford (President from 1973-1974) never was either.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It took me 17 years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. It took one afternoon on the golf course. --Hank Aaron

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Cardboard Con (4, Atlanta GA) The World's Most Affordable Sci-Fi/Fantasy Cardboard Costuming Convention. https://cardboardcon.com/ ~~Yes, they make costumes from cardboard boxes...there are pictures on the website

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 2023 Midwest Geometry Conference (3-5, Manhattan, KS) The Conference will bring together geometers and geometrical analysts from the Midwest and beyond to share ideas and recent results. https://www.math.ksu.edu/about/events/conference/2023midwestgeometry/ ~~Protracted fun

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Poplar + yew = popular

From Estonia: I am single by choice. A Choice made by those reluctant to date me. / From the Congo: Why do Congo gamers refuse to play Monopoly with Belgians? They're afraid of getting owned.

..........and the oboe, it is clearly understood, is an ill wind that no one blows good.........Danny Kaye …..Anatole of Paris

^^^^^ The "Time 100" list first started in 1999, when it was a list of the 100 Most Important People of the 20th Century. Since then, it has been a year-by-year list. From 2000 to 2009, Oprah Winfrey made the list six times (2004-2009); seven times total, counting the original 1999 list. A close runner up for most appearances on the list is Hillary Clinton, at five times (2004, 2006-2009). A handful of other people made three or four appearances on the list, including Bill Gate (the original 1999 list, plus 2004-2006) and the Dalai Lama (2004, 2005, 2008).

My Own Writing of the Week: In the midst of all this goddess reading I saw a vision of Athena. She was tall like statues in the park and she was in all that armor that you see in paintings of her. Why would she wear armor to show herself to a woman who worked for peace? I was walking to work, I wasn't drunk or stoned or ill. I wasn't troubled and I certainly was not looking for visions on my morning walk. I did sometimes chant mantra as I walked but I don't remember whether I did that morning. It was in a tiny little wooded area leading to the campus. The vision itself was definitely mind stuff; it wasn't real in a biological sense. Nor did its appearance startle or frighten me. The figure did not speak, did not even move and I have always thought of it as a kind of totem. If my youngest had been a girl, I would have named her Athena. And I saw Athena one other time in Utah while I was making some hard decisions.

I also saw the lady in white once in a dream. She came out of a sort of hobbit house (except it had a rectangular door) into the side of a hill and she told me to get out of bed and throw up. I did. I attribute it all to bad fish I'd had for supper. But it was still kind of cool to see the lady in white.

I have been in magic circles for rites and ceremonies. I did not, in general, find them more or less satisfying than Christian rites and ceremonies. But I do find that many of my experiences in life (birth, menstruation, menopause, to name three) were best celebrated by ancient myths. One of the things all this reading did for me was to make me look for a (or the) goddess for any particular process. For instance the goddess of Scrabble is Seshat. Seshat is an Egyptian goddess of wisdom, knowledge, and writing. She is considered the creator of writing.

From Always Surrender by Christine Smith

Quote of the Week: A man may be voted a bore or shunned as a pest, and yet he must be accorded the rights to which he is entitled by virtue of being a representative of the people. --Joseph G Cannon Time's first Man of the Year

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Not only does my mind wander, sometimes it walks off completely. --Submitted by bm of kc

Today's Peace of History, March 3, 1913: The day before Woodrow Wilson’s inauguration as president, 8000 from the National American Woman Suffrage Association (NAWSA), representing every state, marched in Washington, D.C. to call for a constitutional amendment granting women the right to vote.

From France: There are two eggs in a fridge. One says to the other, “Hey, you're quite hairy for an egg.” The other replies, “But I am a kiwi”. / From Peru: Why are Pokémon considered manly in Peru? It all dates back to the time of Macho-Pikachu.

..........First you put your two knees close up tight.........Danny Kay …..Ballin' the Jack

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle March 3, 2023,Worldly ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Some infinites are bigger than other infinites. --Georg Cantor

Cost of War:

• As of 03/02/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $201,130,629,963.
• As of 02/20/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $200,337,738,391.
• As of 03/02/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,120,882,202,719.
• As of 02/20/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,118,667,566,926.
• As of 03/02/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,130,176,456,706.
• As of 02/20/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,129,315,260,166.
• As of 03/02/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $2,921,836,915,240.
• As of 02/20/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $2,905,048,526,031.
• As of 03/02/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,010,725,586,606.
• As of 02/20/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,009,044,140,625.
• As of 03/02/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,384,754,176,516.
• As of 02/20/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,362,416,345,151.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The world is now too small for anything but brotherhood. --Arthur Powell Davies

Famous Last Words: ...to the door of my cottage in the Western night. --Allen Ginsberg Howl

..........But the world moves apace..........Danny Kaye …..Wonder Who's Kissing Her Now ~~Danny Kaye died March 3, 1987

From Greece: Three men are sentenced to death in a faraway country: an Englishman, a Frenchman and a Cypriot. On execution day they are asked to name their last wish. The Englishman asks for a cigar. The Frenchman a glass of wine. The Cypriot asks to be granted a last opportunity to talk to the execution squad about the Cyprus problem. On hearing this, the Frenchman and Englishman change their last wishes and beg to be shot before the Cypriot starts talking. / From American Samoa: What do you call a Samoan lying on the floor? Fellafelloffdasofa.

May Peace give you patience

And Joy give you composure

prairie mama

christine

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