Famous
First Words: This
order may be cited... Barbados
Independence Order 1966.
Don't
piss me off or I'll stop taking my pills. And nobody wants that, do
they? / I'm so glad that I don't have to hunt. I have no clue where
gluten free tacos live.
..........and
the lake has alligators.........Allan Sherman …..hullo Muddah
Hello Fadduh
We
should learn to live in peace on our own planet. That way, if
travelers ever do come from space, they'll have a nice place to
visit. --GI, Captain Planet and the Planeteers (1990)
It
is a frigid (32°F) Friday morning. This sky is clouding up as the
sun rises but there is little breeze to move the bare willow branches
or force the cold into the cracks between clothing. Spots of clear
blue vanish behind featureless sheets of white. A small flock of
small birds occupy a small tree in the front yard and discuss their
plans for the day and a few car motors grind away to add a human
touch to the soundtrack. Puck tugs at the leash and greets any
movement at all with good morning barks. We walk to the end of the
sidewalk and back and come into the warmth with much ado. Puck
drinks a bowl of milk and goes back to sleep. I fix myself a cup of
decaf, artificially sweetened and really creamed. Ah, I love the
smell of coffee in the morning; it engages the olfactory with happy
thoughts of actually getting stuff done. It tastes good too. But
none of that compares to the joy of writing to you.
Hope
your weekend projects an aura of total fun, ePistliers.
First
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Justice is a dish best
served cold because, if it were served warm it would be justwater.
When
I die, I want one of my friends to attend the memorial service
dressed like the grim reaper. Don't say anything, just stand there.
/ I do not have ducks. I do not have a row. I have squirrels and
they're at a rave.
..........A
broken heart can't be the only way.........Davy Jones / Monkees
…..Hard To Believe
Trivia
Questions: Happy Independence to Barbados
^
Where is Barbados, more or less?
^^
Any idea how many nations have claimed Barbados over the centuries?
^^^
About how many people do you think live in Barbados?
^^^^
Know where the name came from?
^^^^^
What are the principle agricultural crops in Barbados?
Second
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The
Romaine empire has fallen. Caesar is dead. Lettuce pray. --Terry
Adams --Submitted by mja of ks
Fake
Library Statistic of the Week:
To
celebrate Thanksgiving each year the Librarian of Congress pardons a
cat from a DC shelter that then lives out its days roaming the
Jefferson Building. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts
I
know the voices in my head aren't real, but sometimes they come up
with really great ideas. / I'm almost a millionaire. I have all the
zeros – now, I just need a one.
..........And
away up yonder, ahead of them all.........Peter Stookey, Paul &
Mary …..Stewball
Moonbeam:
Avoid all needle drugs, the only dope worth shooting is Richard
Nixon. --Abbie Hoffman
Something
to Think About of the Week:
Big
Hello: Ciao -
Romansh https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Next
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I
can't turn water into wine, but I can turn pizza into breakfast.
Week
of the Week: National Cookie Cutter Week
(12/1-7) – What do you call a deer shaped cutter – A Cookie Doe /
You said you wouldn't buy anymore cookie cutters, but those 4 boxes
on the porch say that was a lie.
I
don't pretend to be something I'm not. Except normal. I've
pretended to be normal a few times. / Life is short, smile while you
still have teeth.
..........I
wasn't socially suited to make it worth your while.........Davy
Jones/Monkees …..I Never Thought It Peculiar
^
Barbados is an island
country in the Lesser Antilles of the West Indies in the Caribbean
region of North America. It is situated in the western area of the
North Atlantic and 100 km (62 mi) east of the Windward Islands and
the Caribbean Sea. Still lost? Me too – here's
a map:
Almanac:
It is Friday, November 30, 2018. The moon was last quarter yesterday
and is in Virgo. It is Computer Security Day, International Aura
Awareness Day, National Meth Awareness Day, and Stay Home Because
You're Well Day. In Barbados it is Independence Day (1966) and the
Philippines commemorates Bonifacio Day /Heroes' Day (1863). Yemen
PDR also celebrates Independence Day (1967).
Among
those born on this day were Jonathan Swift (1667), Samuel Clemens
(1835), Winston Churchill (1874), Virginia Mayo (1920), Allan Sherman
(1924), Shirley Chisholm (1924), Richard Crenna (1926), Robert
Guillaume (1927), Davy Jones (1931), Abbie Hoffman (1936), Paul
Stookey (1937), David Mamet (1947), Mandy Patinkin (1952), Billy Idol
(1955) and Bo Jackson (1962).
On
November thirtieth Spain ceded Louisiana to France (1803), the
government of East Berlin was set up (1948), Barbados gained
independence from Great Britain (1966), Dahomey became Benin (1975),
and Radio Shack introduced the Tandy 2000 (aka the Trash 2000, 1983).
Night
Sky 11/30:
Two
faint fuzzies naked-eye: The Andromeda Galaxy (M31) and the Perseus
Double Cluster are two of the most famous deep-sky objects. They're
both cataloged as 4th magnitude, and in a fairly good sky you can see
each with the unaided eye. They're located only 22° apart, very high
toward the east early these evenings —
to the right of Cassiopeia and closer below Cassiopeia, respectively.
http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/
Max
Picture of the Week:
Max and the Wry Smile
Third
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Wow,
apparently it's “rude” to ask the parents of a kid on a leash if
it was a rescue.
This
Week: Saturday, December 1 –
Basketball Day & Earmuff Day & Rosa Parks Day
Sunday,
December 2 – Chanukah & National Mutt Day & Special
Education Day
Night
Sky 12/2: Vega
still shines brightly in the west-northwest after dark. The brightest
star above it is Deneb, the head of the big Northern Cross, which is
made of the brightest stars of Cygnus. At nightfall the shaft of the
cross extends lower left from Deneb (by about two fists at arm's
length). By about 11 or midnight, it plants itself more or less
upright on the northwest horizon.
Monday,
December 3 – International Day of Persons with Disabilities
Tuesday,
December 4 – National Cookie Day & National Sock Day &
World Wildlife Conservation Day
Wednesday,
December 5 – Bathtub Party Day & International Ninja Day
& AFL-CIO Day
Thursday,
December 6 – Miners Day & World Trick Shot Day
Sometimes
the thoughts in my head get so bored they go out for a stroll through
my mouth. --Scott Westerfield / You can live to be a hundred if you
give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
..........It's
a nice day to start again.........Billy Idol …..White Wedding
^^
Inhabited by Kalinago people since the 13th century, and prior to
that by other Amerindians, Barbados was claimed for the Spanish Crown
prior to 1511. The Portuguese visited the island in 1536, but they
left it unclaimed. An English ship arrived in Barbados in 1625; its
men took possession of it in the name James I.
First
Advice of the Week: Don't get your tinsel in a tangle.
Moonbeam:
Revolution is not something fixed in ideology, nor is it something
fashioned to a particular decade. It is a perpetual process embedded
in the human spirit. --Abbie Hoffman
Top
Ten Late Night Snacks: Manuel Noriega's Top 10
New Year's Resolutions
10.
No more declaring war on really big countries.
9.
Call that guy I know from Jacoby & Meyers.
8.
Find out if Revlon makes a Spackle.
7.
Send Hallmark's most expensive friendship card to President Bush.
6.
Get New York City taxi license.
5.
Find a travel agent who can work a little faster.
4.
Get in touch with my last friend in the world – Nicolae Ceausescu.
3.
When all this is over, send Pope a thank-you kilo.
2.
Don't trust anybody talking about a "kinder, gentler nation."
1.
Make reservations for Hell.
'Nother
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's
almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas
anxiety.
Classic
Not So Late Night Snacks: So, for the first
year or so of the administration, some guy retrieved the scraps from
the floor of the wastebasket and took it down to a basement where
these two government records professionals would have to tape them
back together. It was just like a jigsaw puzzle, but instead of a
calming seaside pictures or a bunch of cats, they're putting together
classified memos, right - and notes that say things like, just a
reminder - Tiffany's birthday is October 13. And just a reminder -
Tiffany is the name of your daughter. --Peter Sagal Wait,
Wait, Don't Tell Me
May
peace and love from the moon above flow through your heart on the
wings of a dove. --Penny Halliwell Charmed (2004)
He
left a note on the fridge saying, “This isn't working, good-bye”.
I opened it and it works just fine. / I grew up living paycheck to
paycheck, but through hard work and perseverance I now live direct
deposit to direct deposit.
..........Through
my trials and tribulations.........Billy Idol …..Plastic Jesus
^^^
Barbados
has a population of 284,996
people,
predominantly of African descent. That's a
little more than ½ the population of Wyoming.
Worthless
Fact of the Week: Were you aware that in
2012, approximately 1.2 million Americans reported using
methamphetamine in the past year; 440,000 reported using the drug in
the past month.
Wicked
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: This
morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat; it was obvious that she
thought the cat understood her...I came home and told my dog...we
laughed a lot. --Submitted by sd of ks
Weird
Word of the Week:
Jitney – a bus or taxi From the 19th
century – a five cent piece – which was the price of a bus ride
http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa/qa-jit1.htm
Wacky
Uses for Common Products:
Attract fish. When sprayed on fishing bait, WD-40 covers up the
scent of human hands on the bait to better lure fish.
http://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/wd40.html
The
trick is to not let people know how really weird you are until it's
too late for them to back out. / Be decisive. The road is paved with
flat squirrels who couldn't make a decision.
...........Gone
to flowers, every one..........Peter Stookey, Paul & Mary
…..Where Have All The Flowers Gone
^^^^
The name "Barbados" is from either the Portuguese term Os
Barbados or
the Spanish
equivalent,
Los
Barbados,
both meaning "the bearded ones". It is unclear whether
"bearded" refers to the long, hanging roots of the bearded
fig tree
indigenous
to the island, or to the allegedly bearded Caribs who
once inhabited the island, or, more fancifully, to a visual
impression of a beard formed by the sea foam that sprays over the
outlying reefs.
Top
Ten Date of the Week: December 29, 1989
Penultimate
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Who
decided to call it “emotional baggage” and not “griefcase”?
Science
Fiction Convention of the Week:
Thru The Stones (Davenport, 11/20 -12/2) – The first and largest
Outlander
convention in the central US. http://www.thruthestones.com/
Actual
Science Convention of the Week:
Missouri Council of Teachers of Mathematics Fall Conference
(Columbia, 11/30 – 12/1)
https://www.nctm.org/News-and-Calendar/Calendar-Events/Affiliates/Missouri-Council-of-Teachers-of-Mathematics-Fall-Conference-2147019073/
Puck
the Brave
Episode of the Week:
Here's our fearless Puck killing it at karaoke in the case of the
Singing Dogs.
I
don't have an inner child. I have an inner old person who wants
everyone to be quiet. / Whenever I have a panic attack, I put a brown
paper bag over my mouth...and drink all the bourbon inside. It seems
to help.
..........Or
you can't find your shoes........Davy Jones/Monkees …..Laugh
^^^^^
The three main
crops grown on the island are sugar cane, vegetables, and cotton.
Month
of the Week: December is National Pear
Month –Fruits can go to heaven if they get past the pear-ly gates.
The farmer was a magician; she could make fruit disap-pear and then
reap-pear.
Final
Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Hi,
I'm Dr. Smith. I'm going to deliver your baby. Actually, we'd like
him to keep his liver.
Bi-Annual
Movie Review of the Week:
I
saw the movie Green
Book this
week. {A little background: the last time I saw a movie in a theater
was August 2016 (Captain Fantastic ... family friendly full frontal
nudity). Green
Book
is playing in a 12 screen cineplex...the seat electronically recline,
it's more comfortable than my bed. (Captain Fantastic was in the
small room at Liberty Hall – the one with the hard, wooden chair
backs and up a flight that has killed people with stronger hearts
than mine}. I arrived about 10 minutes before the start time
suggested by the ad, yet I sat through 3 hours of ads for movies I
wouldn't watch if my life depended on it. I love this movie. It's
funny, it has depth, it is socially relevant on many levels, and it
has stayed with me. The only problem I have with it was that while
it is set in a Green Book (The
Negro Traveler's Green Book)
world, it is about the white guy - Tony Lipp. The encounters show us
the kinds of problems black people faced at that time (1962 – big
cars and big hair) in that place (the deep south), but Dr. Don
Shirley (Black, Jamacian, gay, pianist classically trained in Russia
and the US) who endures the oppression is not the center of the
movie. Favorite distraction: Tony eats through the entire first half
of the movie, I mean constantly, and it all fits in. I recommend it.
PSs: There could be more Don Shirley music...and...my actor crush
(Viggo Mortensen, Tony Lipp) is very good but I never came to really
like the character.
Grammar
Joke of the Week: A
bar was walked into by the passive voice.
Last
Minute Funniest Thing I Read of the Week:
Smoking Meth and posting Bible quotes on Facebook doesn't make you a
Methodist. --Submitted by ma of va
Today's
Peace of History, November 30, 1993:
The Brady Handgun Violence Prevention Act became law.
I
have expanded my skills. I can now forget what I'm doing while I'm
actually doing it. / Common Sense is like deodorant. The people who
need it most never use it.
..........I'd
ring out love between my brothers and my sisters.........Peter
Stookey, Paul & Mary …..If I Had A Hammer
Masthead
of the Week:
Friday ePistle November 30, 2018, ePistle Etc. Online at:
http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/
Peace, Laughs, and Silly Voices in your head. Exclusive editor:
Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047
Final
Piece of Advice of the Week: Now and
then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be
happy. --Submitted by ajm of ok
Moonbeam:
Free speech means the right to shout “theater” in a crowded fire.
--Abbie Hoffman
Cost
of War:
As
of 11/29/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,876,771,685,464.
As
of 11/22/18 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,874,892,851,413.
As
of 11/29/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $864,398,158,395.
As
of 11/22/18 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $863,121,565,295.
As
of 11/29/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $636,329,011,024.
As
of 11/22/18 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $634,724,157,477.
As
of 11/29/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $300,256,578,153.
As
of 11/22/18 Veterans Care since 2001: $299,891,856,148.
As
of 11/29/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,677,756,079,251.
As
of 11/22/18 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $4,672,631,100,089.
Call
me old fashioned, but if you really wanted peace couldn't you just
stop fighting? --Doctor Who Doctor Who
..........Sir
Isaac Newton came around to my house one day.........Allan Sherman
…..Green Stamps
Waiting
to see how long it takes this police sketch artist to realize I'm
describing him. / If you see your glass as half empty, pout it into a
smaller glass and stop bitching.
Famous
Last Words: My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father,
prepare to die. The Princess Bride
May
Peace whisper in your ear
And
Joy shout at your side
prairie
mama
christine
Last
Laugh: