ePistle Foreseen

 Famous First Words: An act to support the fifteenth amendment... Federal Voting Rights Act of 1965

It's International Psychic Week (1-7) When I arrived at Madame Zukunft's Psychic Shack, I noticed right away that she was a strange bovine. She cast my horoscope. She billed herself as the Zodi-yak. / When Phyllis knocked on the door of Psy Chic Clin Ic, she was so disappointed that someone asked “who's there” that she left.

..........The jukebox will cure your ill.........Carl Perkins …..Boppin' the Blues

Nagasaki and Hiroshima remind us to put peace first every day; to work on conflict prevention and resolution, reconciliation, and dialogue; and to tackle the roots of conflict and violence. --Antonio Guterres

It is a beautiful Friday morning. The sun is touching everything outdoors and making it bright and colorful and interesting. 72°F is a perfect combination of not-too-hot, not-too-cool. A light breeze moves the willow branches into a slow dance, but not the more rigid trees. They stand still. A bird, hidden in the foliage, repeats a single note, calling to come enjoy the day. All growing things are still green and lush; there are no patches of dried yellow grass or brown stubs or spent flowers. Squirrels and rabbits make the grass come alive with movement and sometimes tiny squeaks and squeals. Puck sniffs around looking for small game or new friends. He barks at the dog sitting with his human but that dog doesn't not answer. Two dogs on the corner however, hold a spirited conversation before I drag Puck back away and we return home. The house smells of freshly brewed coffee and I fix myself a cup, cream, sweetener and inhale the rich steamy mixture and sip the hot sweet liquid. Ahhh, and now I get to write to you, what a fine, fine morning.

Hope your weekend is everything you expected, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Lock your doors this week if you live in the Midwest or people will put free zucchini in your car. --Submitted by RHOZ

A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you." The frog is thrilled, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party?" "No," says his advisor, "in her biology class." / I had a psychic boyfriend once; but he left me before we met..

..........Well you can do anything.........Elvis Presley …..Blue Suede Shoes

Trivia Questions: 76 years ago today the bomb was dropped on Hiroshima. What have we learned about nuclear weapons?

^ What was the name of the bomb that was dropped on Hiroshima?

^^ Do you know the name of the plane or the pilot who dropped it?

^^^ What size was that bomb?

^^^^ Do you have any idea how many people died in Hiroshima that day?

^^^^^ Do you know about how many nuclear weapons are out there now?

Big Hello: Hallo – Faroese https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If we wanted to boldly send billionaires where no billionaires have been before, we could just have sent them to the tax office. --John the Scot --Submitted by ab of kc

Max Picture of the Week: Max and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Germ

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: 34% of librarians are surprisingly unorganized. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

Why did the chicken go to the psychic? To get to the other side. / The only time I used a psychic was when my house was haunted by the spirits of dead chickens. He said it was the worst case of poultrygeist, he'd ever seen.

..........Everything about you is so doggone sweet.........The Beatles …..Honey Don't

Moonbeam: I am a part of all that I have met. --Alfred Lord Tennyson

Meditation Seed of the Week: Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: This morning my son said his ear hurt and I said on the inside or outside, so he walked out the front door, came back in and said “both”. --Submitted by INRITH

Week of the Week: Stop On The Red Week (2-8) --The traffic light on the corner has a crush on me. It turns red every time I'm around. / A man is driving across town with his dog. He sees a traffic light and begins to stop. The day says, “Why are you slowing down, the light's gray”.

I tried to make a living as a psychic but just couldn't find enough clients. So, I became a non-prophet. / That fat man that just moved in down the block opened a Psychic Salon in his front room. He bills himself as a Four Chin Teller.

..........Well now come on, cat, get with it.........Carl Perkins …..Put Your Cat Clothes On

^ "Little Boy" was the code-name for the type of atomic bomb dropped on the Japanese city of Hiroshima on 6 August 1945.

Almanac: It is Friday, August 6, 2021. The moon will be new on Sunday and is in Leo. It is Hiroshima Day, International Hangover Day (Always the day after International Beer Day), National Fresh Breath (Halitosis), National Jamaican Patty Day, National Root Beer Float Day, and Sandcastle Day. Because it is the first weekend in August it is also Satchmo Days: Here's La Vie En Rose

Among those born on this day were Alfred Lord Tennyson (1809), Paul Claudel (1868), Scott Nearing (1883), Lucille Ball (1911), Robert Mitchum (1917), Andy Warhol (1927), Swoosie Kurtz (1944), Ken Norton (1945), Catherine Hicks (1951), and Carl C Perkins (1952).

On August sixth a Supernova was observed by Chinese and Japanese astronomers (1811), the Constitutional Convention in Philadelphia began debate (1878), Bolivia gained independence (1825), congress passed the Confiscation Act (1861), Gertrude Ederle swam the English Channel (1926), the US dropped an atom bomb on Hiroshima (1945), Jamaica gained independence (1962), the Federal Voting Rights Act was passed (1965), the UN Security Council voted to place economic sanctions on Iraq (1990).

Night Sky, 8/6: Bright Vega passes closest to overhead around 10 or 11 pm now, depending on how far east or west you are in your time zone. How closely it misses your zenith depends on how far north or south you are. It passes right through your zenith if you're at latitude 39° north (Washington DC, Cincinnati, Kansas City, Lake Tahoe). How closely can you judge this just by looking? Deneb crosses closest to the zenith two hours after Vega. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Image of the Week: Happy Sandcastle Day

This Week: Saturday, August 7 – Lighthouse Day & Particularly Preposterous Packaging Day

Sunday, August 8 – Sneak Zucchini Onto Your Neighbors' Porch Night & Dalek Day & International Cat Day

Monday, August 9 – Book Lovers Day & Islamic New Year

Night Sky 8/9: Have you been seeing any Perseids meteors yet? For now you'll only see the very occasional Perseid during your observing sessions, but their numbers are gradually increasing. The shower is due to peak later but occasional forerunners begin showing up as much as two or three weeks beforehand. Already the sky is moonlessly dark.

Tuesday, August 10 – World Lion Day & Paul Bunyan Day

Wednesday, August 11 – National Hip Hop Day

Night Sky, 8/11 : Perseids Meteor Shower. 2021 is a great year for the Perseids! The waxing crescent moon will set at early evening, providing dark skies. Start watching for these meteors in early August. Their numbers will gradually increase. Predicted peak tonight.

Thursday, August 12 – International Youth Day & World Elephant Day & Vinyl Record Day

That fat lady that moved in down the block does Tarot readings in her swimming pool. She bills herself as a Clairbouyant. / During the pandemic Paula the Psychic gave up the business and started a clothing line called Medium's. She made tiny t-shirts and little onesies. Now I own a large small medium.

..........singin' seems to help a troubled soul.........Johnny Cash …..Daddy Sang Bass

^^ The bomb was dropped by the Boeing B-29 Superfortress, Enola Gay, piloted by Colonel Paul Tibbets, Jr, commander of the 509^th Composite Group of the United States Army Air Forces and Captain Robert Lewis. The plane was named after Tibbet's mother.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It could be raining men and I'd still be single. --Submitted by PsyDe

Moonbeam: War is an attempt of one group to impose its will upon another group by armed violence. --Scott Nearing

Video of the Week: The Perseids of 2020 Observatory captures peak of Perseid meteor shower - YouTube

Ollie's Very Own Picture of the Week: Happy Ollie, Happy Mom

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: Who will be the next sports team to change their name? The Brooklyn Nets will be the Brooklyn Gentrifiers. They may not win at first but they'll win eventually. --Hari Kondabolu Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 7/31/21

Has not the atom bomb proved the futility of all violence? --M K Gandhi

How many psychics does it take to change a light bulb? None, but they'll tell you who will change it. / I dated a psychic kitchen remodeler. She was counter intuitive.

........Later on if it turns to chaos..........The Fray …..Say When

^^^ Little Boy exploded with an energy of approximately 15 kilotons of TNT.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he can rob the world. --Submitted by bd of ny

Weird Word of the Week: Virotherapist – practitioner of virotherapy – harnessing viruses to stop cancer World Wide Words: Virotherapist

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Clean a Thermos bottle. Fill the bottle with water, drop in four Alka-Seltzer tablets, and let soak for an hour (or longer, if necessary). Alka-Seltzer®: Wacky Uses

Puzzle of the Week: It comes from the puzzle maker and editor Peter Gordon. Think of the word for a competitor in a particular Olympic sport. It's a compound word with a hyphen in the middle. Remove the hyphen. What remains are two words from a different Olympic sport. What words are these? NPR Sunday Puzzle 8/1/21

I dated a psychic once. She called her farts gastral projection. / My psychic friend Martha always rode her bike between the street and the sidewalk. She was a median medium.

...........And time has a way to turning us old.........Dolly Parton …..Silver And Gold

^^^^ In Hiroshima, on August 6, around 80,000 people were killed immediately when the bomb was dropped. The estimated total by the end of 1945 was 140,000. It is very difficult to get a real number because of the nature of the destruction and the chaos that followed such an event.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Hey Hey Ho Ho Creepy Cuemo has got to go --Submitted by rg of kc

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: CONvergence (5-8, Minneapolis, MN) The stuff of Legends CONvergence | CONvergence Convention (convergence-con.org)

Actual Science Conference of the Week: Geoanalysis 2021 (1-6, Freiberg) Topical short courses will be given by experts. Geoanalysis 2021 | Spectroscopy Europe/World

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Shot-putter — Shot, Putter

Psychic Selma: I don't know if it's better to tell you what's going to happen to you next week or to follow you around just to see the look on your face when it does. / Nothing embarrasses a psychic more than a surprise party.

..........But I've seen the light..........Patsy Cline …..So Wrong

^^^^^ The Federation of American Scientists (FAS) estimates approximately 4,315 nuclear warheads, including 1,570 deployed offensive strategic warheads (with 870 in storage), 1,875 non-strategic warheads, and 2,060 additional retired warheads awaiting dismantlement, as of January 2020. For a list of who has what: Nuclear Weapons: Who Has What at a Glance | Arms Control Association

My Own Writing of the Week: The first off planet science fiction convention (LUNACON I) was held in Base III at the Selene Hilton in 2032. It was necessarily small because of the still prohibitive aerofare and the size of the hotel ballroom. 500 devoted fans and the guest of honor, Norman Lump, gathered to celebrate fandom's emergence into space and science fiction in general. However, it is the tragedy for which LUNACON I will be remembered. The media projector broke at hour 10 of the 25 1/2 hour continuous showing of all 21 Star Wars movies. When the lights were turned up 5 small green creatures with antennae were discovered in the front row. A young fan approached them to compliment them on their outfits; she noticed they had neither wrist bands nor ID badges. She called security. The five fled through a ventilator shaft with a loose cover. Convention and hotel security officers quickly covered all the air inlets. Unfortunately, first fandom representative 133 year old Robert del Pohl and his 22 year old bride, Queenie, were asphyxiated in their bed. Four businessmen from Toledo were treated for shortness of breath. The five were finally cornered between the WC and the lift tube. They took a stand, backs to the wall. The shortest of them held a small black box to the top of his head. Static noises filled the air ducts then the hotel and finally the entire dome. All Base II held its breath and waited for death or the first alien communication whichever it was to be. The static cleared, a rich baritone voice cleared its throat and after a sustained E-flat tone spoke... Happy Birthday! --From a birthday card sent to John Kessel

Extreme Topiary of the Week: From the Beijing Olympics

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: There are only two types of anti-vaxxers: the liars, and the lied to. You can often tell them apart by the amount of zeros in their bank accounts. --Alex Hirsch --Submitted by gr of oh

Today's Peace of History, August 6, 1957: Eleven activists from the Committee for Nonviolent Action (CNVA) were arrested attempting to enter the atomic testing grounds at Camp Mercury, Nevada, the first of what eventually became many thousands of arrests at the Nevada test site.

I have visited dozens of psychics. They are either very angry or really sad. Is there no happy medium? / ebay listing: Used crystal ball for sale. Worth a fortune.

..........About the moon and the stars above.........The Judds …..Let Me Tell You About Love

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle August 6, 2021, ePistle Foreseen. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047

Moonbeam: Truth has nothing to do with the number of people it convinces. --Paul Claudel

Son of Today's Peace of History, August 6, 1998: Calling themselves the Minuteman III Plowshares, two peace activists, Daniel Sicken [pronounced seekin], 56, of Brattleboro, Vermont and Sachio Ko-Yin, 25, of Ridgewood, N.J entered silo N7 in Weld County [near Greeley] in Colorado operated by Warren AFB, Cheyenne, Wyoming. With hammers and their own blood, they symbolically disarmed structures on the launching pad of a Minuteman III nuclear missile silo.

Cost of War:

As of 8/5/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,153,334,400,602.

As of 7/29/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,151,339,326,601.

As of 8/5/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,052,353,559,891.

As of 7/29/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,050,997,516,204.

As of 8/5/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $872,615,987,783.

As of 7/29/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $870,911,081,141.

As of 8/5/21 Veterans Care since 2001: $353,958.199,180.

As of 7/29/21 Veterans Care since 2001: $353,570.681,893.

As of 8/5/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,432,262,992,923.

As of 7/29/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,426,819,368,398.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The bomb was not only dropped on the citizens of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. It was dropped on the whole of humanity. --Satoru Konishi

Famous Last Words: ...contrary to the provisions of this act. --First Act of Confiscation 1861

..........I keep a-workin' and a-watchin' the clock.........Carl Perkins …..Jive After Five ~~All of today's songs were written by Carl Perkins.

Here's your first Tarot card. Would you like to double down. O, I'm sorry, that was a insight joke. / The Psychic Fair has been canceled due to unforeseen circumstances.

May Peace fill your days

And Joy sate your nights

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh: --Submitted by INRITH

Insured ePistle

 Famous First Words: RESOLVED, That Richard M. Nixon... Articles of Impeachment 1974

Happy Birthday, Medicare !! My meds: This one is for a good night's sleep and this one is for the headaches I get trying to understand the medicare drug plan. / Medicare Advice: Get sick now, before the republicans take away Medicare.

..........Honey in the mornin', honey in the evenin', honey at suppertime.........McGuire Sisters …..Sugartime

Born in iniquity and conceived in sin, the spirit of nationalism has never ceased to bend human institutions to the service of dissension and distress. --Thorstein Veblen

It is a muggy Friday morning (81°, 75% RH). The sky is crisscrossed with thin lines of clouds that are most likely decaying jet trails. Sunlight brightens everything it touches. Birds flit about and call to one another and rabbits run ahead of us and hide under cars. Puck barks at a couple and then gives it up for smelling grass and every piece of litter than he passes. There is little wind to cool the brow or kiss the cheek. Earth smells of dryness and heat. We walk to the end of the block, but Puck does not wade into the weeds in the park. Instead, he turns around and heads back home. Once we stop and bark at a phantom in a neighbor's yard. Nothing moves there. We step into coolness. The new air conditioner has tamed the 48 hours of warmth that built up. Ahh. I doctor my decaf and sit down at my computer. Puck lies down at my feet. A long warm gulp of coffee slides down my throat and I am ready to write to you.

Hope your weekend is friendly and then some, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What if UFOs are just billionaires from other planets? --Submitted by mh

I'm so sorry, but Medicare will only pay to cut out 98% of your tumor. If you want me to remove it all, I'll need to run your credit card for the difference. / Play Prescription Drug Twister –-The fun new Medicare game.

..........You share my reverie.........Paul Anka …..You Are My Destiny

Trivia Questions: Happy Anniversary to Richard Nixon's Impeachment. A Memory Quiz

^ Who was “Deep Throat” really?

^^ Who first said the famous line: “What did the president know and when did he know it”?

^^^ What event became known as the Saturday Night Massacre?

^^^^ Who let it slip to senate investigators that Nixon recorded everything?

^^^^^ In what year did Ford pardon Nixon?

Big Hello: Ola- Extremaduran (Extremaduran is a Romance language spoken in western Spanish, mainly in the autonomous community of Extremadura, and in neighboring parts of Salamanca, Toledo, Ciudad Real, Córdoba and Huelva. It is also spoken in Barrancos in Portugal. ttps://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Last night my roommate asked me if I'd seen the dog bowl. I said I didn't know he could. --Submitted by rk of ks

Max Picture of the Week: Max, the Pink Dragon ...in a red mask …taking a taxi

Fake Library Statistic of the Week: In libraries, the only thing we have to fear is the Chair of the library party planning committee https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

With Medicare, every member has a preexisting condition. / Marilyn is the most popular resident at Pioneer Ridge Assisted Living. She's the only one who figured out how the Medicare Drug Plan works.

..........May the bluebird sing your song.........McGuire Sisters …..May You Always

Moonbeam: Every leaf speaks bliss to me, fluttering from the autumn tree. --Emily Brontë

Meditation Seed of the Week: Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as 4's?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I guess we should retire the expression “avoid it like the plague” given how little effort people put into avoiding an actual plague. --Submitted by ss of kc

Worthless Fact of the Week: Anita Bryant's granddaughter is marrying a woman. Just thought you might want to know. --Submitted by jm of ks ~~I checked this one out and apparently this is true. The Advocate, a very reputable magazine confirms it.

Week of the Week: Quilt Odyssey Week (29-31) --I just spent two hours organizing my stockpile of fabric. I think I'll reward myself with a trip to the yardgoods store. / If I clean the house, it just gets dirty again. But if I make a quilt, it stays made. I love that.

John Doe, Nursing Home Resident...cause of death: Deep government cuts allowed to fester and become gangrenous due to neglect. / It was recently discovered that the hieroglyphs in King Tut's tomb were actually Egypt's medicare drug plan.

..........You're the maximum, most.........Edd Byrns …..Kookie Lend Me Your Comb

^Deep Throat was W Mark Felt, Sr. At the time he was Associate Director of the FBI. His identity was finally disclosed in a Vanity Fair article in 2005.

Almanac: It is Friday, July 30, 2021. The moon will be in the third quarter tomorrow and is in Taurus. It is Cheesecake Day, Father-In-Law Day, Friendship Day aka International Day of Friendship, Health Care Now! (Medicare's Birthday, 1965), National Chicken and Waffles Day, National Share A Hug Day, National Whistleblowers Appreciation Day, Paperback Book Day, World Day Against Trafficking in Persons, and System Administrator Appreciation Day. In Cuba it is the Day of Martyrs of the Revolution, and in France it is Marseillaise Day (1792). In Virginia it is Crater Day (1864) and Gilroy, CA celebrates at the Garlic Festival all weekend. Because it is the last Friday in July it is also National Get Gnarly Day and National Talk in An Elevator Day.

Among those born on this day were Giorgio Vasari (1511), Emily Brontë (1818), James Edward Kelly (1855), Thorstein Veblen (1857), Henry Ford (1863), Vladimir Zworykin (1889), Casey Stengel (1890), Henry Moore (1898), William Gass (1924), Christine McGuire (McGuire Sisters, 1929), Edd Kookie Byrnes (1933), Eleanor Smeal (1939), Paul Anka (1941), David Sanborn (1945), Arnold Schwarzenegger (1947), and Delta Burke (1956).

On July thirith Virginia formed the House of Burgesses (1619), the City of Baltimore was founded (1729), slaves took over the Amistad (1839), the US yacht club was organized was authorized (1844), the second Balkan War came to an end (1913), The Women's Navy Auxiliary Agency (WAVES, 1942) , the House of Representatives recommended 3 articles of impeachment against Nixon (1974), and Jimmy Hoffas was last seen (1975).

Night Sky, 7/30: As summer progresses, Arcturus moves down the western side of the evening sky. Arcturus forms the bottom point of the Kite of Bootes. The Kite, rather narrow, extends upper right from Arcturus by 23°, about two fists at arm's length. The lower right side of the kite is dented inward, as if some celestial intruder once banged into it. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Image of the Week: Momiji Nishiya, 13 years old, won gold in women's street skateboarding.

This Week: Saturday, July 31 – International Slumber Party Night & National Mutt Day & Uncommon Instruments Awareness Day

Sunday, August 1 – Girlfriend's Day & Lammas Day aka Loafmass aka Lughnasa & National Mah Jongg Day

Night Sky, 8/1: Saturn is in opposition. Do you already notice that Saturn's rings are distinctly brighter, compared to Saturn's globe, than they usually are? This Seeliger effect is caused by the solid ring particles backscattering sunlight to us when the Sun is almost directly behind us. The dusty surfaces of the Moon and Mars do this too, but Saturn's clouds do not.

Monday, August 2 – Assistance Dog Day & National Coloring Book Day & Take A Penny/Leave A Penny Day

Tuesday, August 3 – Friendship Day & National Night Out

Wednesday, August 4 – Single Working Women's Day & Social Security Day

Night Sky, 8/4: Venus (magnitude –3.9) continues to shine low in the west during twilight. It sets around twilight's end. Mars is disappearing from sight deep in the sunset, lower right of Venus

Thursday, August 5 – National Oyster Day & National Underwear Day

Actually, the stress caused by trying to figure out Medicare is not covered by Medicare. / Medicare – providing insurance to the elderly without losing one cent for big pharm.

..........People say that love's a game.........Paul Anka …..Put Your Head On My Shoulder

^^ The big question was posed by Senator Howard Baker, Jr. of Tennessee who was vice chair of the senate select committee on presidential campaign activities.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The fastest land mammal is a toddler who has been asked, “What's in your mouth?”.

Moonbeam: Just think – guns have a constitutional amendment protecting them and women don't. --Eleanor Smeal

Video of the Week: There is a Beatles song (Your Mother Should Know) with the lyric “was a hit before your mother was born): Here's Collins & Harlan singing When That Midnight Choo, Choo Leaves For Alabam” which was a hit in 1913: Collins and Harlan "When That Midnight Choo-Choo Leaves For Alabam'" (Irving Berlin song) 1912 - YouTube

Ollie's Very Own Picture of the Week: Ollie in gray, Max in water wings, Dad in euphoria

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: The whole thing lasted 11 minutes or as an Amazon worker knows three lunch breaks. --Peter Sagal Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 7/24/21

Labor wants pride and joy in doing good work, a sense of making or doing something beautiful or useful - to be treated with dignity and respect as brother and sister. --Thorstein Veblen

How many doctors does it take to charge a light bulb? Three 1 to find a bulb specialist. 1 to find a bulb installation specialist, and one to bill it all to medicare. / It's an experimental drug. We're still testing to see how much customers will pay for it.

..........Hustling, bustling, buzzing around.........McGuire Sisters …..Muskrat Ramble

^^^ The events surrounding President Nixon ordering the firing of Archibald Cox, the Watergate special prosecutor, became known as the Saturday Night Massacre.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Did you know? By replacing your potato chips with grapefruit as a snack you can lose up to 90% of what little joy you still have left in your life. --Submitted by INRITH

Weird Word of the Week: Urtication – flogging with nettles – both the erotic stimulation and the folk remedy. World Wide Words: Urtication

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Polish jewelry. Drop two Alka-Seltzer tablets into a glass of water and immerse the jewelry for two minutes. Alka-Seltzer®: Wacky Uses

Puzzle of the Week: Last week's challenge: From Joseph Young, of St. Cloud, Minn., who conducts the blog "Puzzleria." Take the name of a flower that has a common girl's name in consecutive letters inside it. Remove that name, and the remaining letters, in order, sound like another girl's name. What flower is it? NPR Puzzle Sunday 7/25/21

We've run every test we could think of and the results show that you are at the annual Medicare limit. / Have you heard about the new Medicare Drug Plan called Plan C? Medicare gives you $30 for a bus ticket to Canada.

...........You're a melody from a symphony by Strauss.........Edd Byrnes …..You're The Top

^^^^ Alexander Butterfield, a white house aide, mentioned the white house taping system, which had been installed in 1971, during televised Senate Watergate Committee testimony.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Picking up this tiny piece of paper would take 1 second, but instead I am going to run over it 100 times with the vacuum at different angles. --Submitted by RHOZ

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Diversicon 28 (30-1, Plymouth,MN) --The Roaring 20s Diversicon

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 48^th Annual Review of Progress in in Quantitative Nondestructive Evaluation: (28-30, Online event) --to provide an interface between research and early engineering

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Amaryllis — Mary, Alice

Medicare wishes to remind you that you are deliberately putting yourself at risk of ill health by being over 65. / Unfortunately, Medicare Part D does not cover Costrophobia relief medicines.

..........Oh, how can I tell them.........Paul Anka …..Puppy Love

^^^^^ President Ford pardoned Nixon on September 8, 1974 with Proclamation 4311.

My Own Writing of the Week: For several encounters Odysseus and I made jokes about Redi-whip® and the marvels of its sweet nothingness in proximity to certain parts of the anatomy. Then one afternoon as I was laying in bed, nearly napping, I felt something swoop down my back, hissing and spitting liquid. I screamed. Moral: Redi-Whip® - Yes! Surprise - No! --From: Always Surrender: Memories, observations, micro-stories, fantasies, and lies from my life as an insurgent in the sexual revolution

Extreme Topiary of the Week: Share A Hug Day

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better. --Anne Lamott

Today's Peace of History, July 30, 1996: Four Ploughshares activists in Liverpool, England, were acquitted of all charges (illegal entry and criminal damage) on the basis of their having prevented a greater crime, after having extensively damaged an F-16 Hawk fighter jet to be sold to the Indonesian government for use in its genocidal occupation of East Timor.

According to our records, you had the same illness 200 years ago in a previous life. That qualifies as a preexisting condition. / Medicare Part D – US cure for opioid addiction.

..........Meets an old immovable object like me.........McGuire Sisters …..Something's Gotta Give

Son of Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Why read dystopian fiction when you can just pay attention? --Submitted by MMS

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle July 30, 2021, Insured ePistle Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047

Moonbeam: She burned too bright for this world. --Emily Brontë

Cost of War:

As of 7/29/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,151,339,326,601.

As of 7/22/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,149,388,895,676.

As of 7/29/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,050,997,516,204.

As of 7/22/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,049,671,999,548.

As of 7/29/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $870,911,081,141.

As of 7/22/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $869,244,719,365.

As of 7/29/21 Veterans Care since 2001: $353,570.681,893.

As of 7/22/21 Veterans Care since 2001: $353,191.959,725.

As of 7/29/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,426,819,368,398.

As of 7/22/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,421,499,186,957.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The abjectly poor, and all those persons whose energies are entirely absorbed by the struggle for daily sustenance, are conservative because they cannot afford the effort of taking thought for the day after tomorrow; just as the highly prosperous are conservative because they have small occasion to be discontented with the situation as it stands today. --Thorstein Veblen

Famous Last Words: It evens itself out. --Casey Stengel

..........Remembering all those little things.........Paul Anka …..My Heart Sings

Medicare Blues: There were ten in bed and the little one said, “These Medicare cuts are ridiculous”. / After a lecture on the general theory of relativity, Albert Einstein said to his audience, “But don't ask me to explain Medicare Part D”.

May Peace refresh your body

And Joy restore your soul

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

Gold Medal ePistle

 Famous First Words: In the name of Preverti, daughter of the mountains.. Help the movie

Well, the 2020 Summer Olympics are finally here. I understand that the dinosaur from the Republic of Skull Island is favored to win big in the races. She's a prontosaurus. / To get ready for this year's Olympics, I read The Olympic Trials by Willy Qualify.

..........I'll go one on one against the world.........Cheech & Chong …..Basketball Jones

Remember that the true worth of colonies lies in their prosperity and progress, and that justice, impartial alike to black and white, is the first element of prosperity. --W E B DuBois Letter to the first PanAfrican Conference

It is a warm (76°F) Friday morning. The sun is rising and erasing the few thin, wispy clouds turning them from white to blue. A mourning dove is mourning somewhere unseen. Grass and leaves and flower stalks are green as green and dabs of color sit on them, yellow, red, blue. Summer is indeed upon the land. Unseen dogs bark at Puck as we walk along and he answers; it is a conversation of unknown content that fills the air with life noises. We make it to the end of the block and back without encountering the chickens that sometimes roam freely. (Now we know that the chicken crossed the road to get to the neighbor's flower beds.) It is an uneventful walk until someone dares drive a car up to a house, park it, and get out. Puck sets her straight and we return to our cool rooms and my hot creamy coffee (the last of the Mother's Day brew). But best of all, now I get to sit down and write to you.

Hope your weekend takes the gold, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Hawaiian Rules: 4) Speak softly and wear a loud shirt.

I understand that the fastest runner at the Olympics is an insect, the Quicket. / Olympiads (noun) –Commercials shown during the Summer Games.

..........Moving is breathing and breathing is life.........Soundgarden …..Rowing

Trivia Questions: Happy National Pajama Day

^ Where does the word pajama come from, anyway?

^^ How come some pajamas cover the feet?

^^^ What do you know about the Guinness World Record Footed Pajama Party?

^^^^ How has the pandemic affected pajama sales.

^^^^^ Who needs pajamas?

Big Hello: Tere – Estonian https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Metaphysics was invented by papyrus manufacturers to sell more scrolls. --Submitted by Philosophy Matters

Max Picture of the Week: Dr Max in surgery

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: The average librarian has cards from 5 different libraries on them at all times. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

The nurse who gave me my COVID shots just qualified for Javelin at the Tokyo Games. / Excuse me, are you the pole vaulter? Nein, Ich bin der Deutcher, Walter.

..........Like a modern gladiator, ain't got no fears.........Suicidal Tendencies …..Possessed To Skate

Moonbeam: Love cures people - both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it. --Karl Menninger

Meditation Seed of the Week: Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Sometimes I delete my own posts because I'm not the same person I was 4 mins ago. --Submitted by RHOZ

Week of the Week: National Baby Food Week (21-24) –Why do they bother making baby food in all those flavors. It all ends up tasting like an airplane. / Pirate babies eat Grrr Brrrs. / The best warmth for baby food is womb temperature.

I competed in the suntanning Olympics, but I only got bronze. / Americans are favored in all the shooting sports. After all, they practice at the best schools.

..........The fastest man on Earth.........Paul Simon …..Cool Papa Bell

^ The word “pajama” comes from the Indian word “piejamah,” which described loose pants that were tied at the waist.

Almanac: It is Friday, July 23, 2021. The moon is full (Buck) today and is in Capricorn. It is Gorgeous Grandma Day, Hot Enough For Ya Day, and National Pajama Day. Since 1952 Egypt, Libya, Ethiopia, and Oman have celebrated this day as National Day. In ancient Rome it was Nepununalia – a festival of the sea god.

Among those born on this day were Gluyas Williams (1888), ~~A cartoon of his is the last laugh~~Haile Selassie (1892), Karl Menniger (1893), Arther Treacher (1894), Ben Weber (1916), Pee Wee Reese (1919), Bert Convy (1933), Don Imus (1947), Martin Gore (Depeche Mode, 1961), and Woody Harrelson (1961).

On July twenty-third Caravaggio won his first public commission for paintings (1599), the typographer, aka typewriter, was patented (1829), The Cincinnati Reds baseball club was established (1866), the first commercial hydroelectric power plant began operations (MI, 1880), the Pan African Congress met in London (1900), the ice cream cone was created (maybe, 1904), Kenya became a British crown colony (1920), Yale university isolated the pituitary hormone (1937), the Progressive Party convention nominated Henry Wallace for president (1948), the first 4 women were admitted to peerage in the House of Lords (1958), and the Beatles released Help (UK, 1965).

Night Sky, 7/23: The Moon is up in the east by late twilight. Look for Saturn about a fist at arm's length to its left. By dawn on the 24th they shift to the southwest and twist around so that Saturn is above the Moon, as shown below. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Image of the Week: A woman attempted to extinguish the Olympic Torch with a water gun.

This Week: Saturday, July 24 – Cousins Day & National Day of the Cowboy & Tell An Old Joke Day

Sunday, July 25 – Hire A Veteran Day & National Parents Day & Red Shoe Day

Night Sky, 7/25: Now both Regulus and Mars are well down to Venus's lower right, by 4° and 7° respectively.

Monday, July 26 – Aunts and Uncles Day & One Voice Day

Tuesday, July 27 – Korean War Armistice Day & Take you Houseplant for a Walk Day & Walk on Stilts Day

Wednesday, July 28 – National Waterpark Day

Night Sky, 7/28: And in the east after dark Saturn shines upper right of the Moon, and Jupiter shines farther to the Moon's left. Again, by dawn this scene of action shifts to the southwest and the pattern rotates clockwise.

Thursday, July 29 – Global Tiger Day & Lasagna Day & Rain Day

Nigeria is sorry that it did not win a single game in Tokyo. The Nigerian Sports Minister will personally refund the expenses that fans accrued traveling to Japan. He just needs your bank details and PIN number.

..........And we all yelled loud and we all complained.........Mick Jagger …..England Lost

^^ Footed Pajamas Aren't Always For Kids: They actually started out as something designed for adults. The first versions were made when people began sewing socks to the bottom of their pajama pants. It wasn’t to just keep their feet warm; it was to prevent bugs like termites from nibbling on their toes.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If any of you non-rich people want to go into space for 10 minutes, I know a good brownie recipe. --Submitted by INRITH

Moonbeam: The progress of science can be said to be harmful to religion only insofar as it is used for evil aims and not because it claims a priority over religion in its revelation to man. --Haile Selassie

Video of the Week: For decades one of my favorite songs has been Water Boy. My playlist has covers by Odetta and the Don Shirley Trio. This video is by Paul Robeson Paul Robeson - Water Boy - YouTube

Ollie's Very Own Picture of the Week: Brothers in the skin

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: How will Texas lure back Texas Democrats? Four words: free bbq for life --Gina Brillon 20 gallon hats because why stop at 10, Texas. --Helen Hong Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 7/17/21

That until the philosophy which holds one race superior and another inferior is finally and permanently discredited and abandoned: That until there are no longer first-class and second class citizens of any nation; That until the color of a man's skin is of no more significance than the color of his eyes; That until the basic human rights are equally guaranteed to all without regard to race; That until that day, the dream of lasting peace and world citizenship and the rule of international morality will remain but a fleeting illusion, to be pursued but never attained. --Haile Selassie

It is a myth that a runner eats lots of carbs before a big race. Actually they eat nothing, they fast. / During the 1924 Olympics in France did athletes compete in Oui Sports?

..........I'm gonna show you what I'm made of..........Don Henley …..The Boys Of Summer

^^^ The World’s Largest Footed Pajama Party was held in Austin, Texas on March 11, 2012 where 309 adults were dressed in their footies and broke the Guinness World Record.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Jeff Bezos was in space for 5 minutes – or as it's known at the Amazon warehouse, your allotted break time for a 16-hour day. --Trevor Noah

Weird Word of the Week: Taqwacore (n) A recent musical genre. The name combines the Arabic taqwá, which may be translated as piety or the quality of being God-fearing, with the music term hardcore. World Wide Words: Taqwacore

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Clean a vase. To remove a stain from the bottom of a glass vase or cruet, fill with water and drop in two Alka-Seltzer tablets. Alka-Seltzer®: Wacky Uses

Puzzle of the Week: This challenge comes from listener Peter Collins, of Ann Arbor, Mich. Think of a country. Embedded in consecutive letters is a well-known brand name. The first, second, eighth and ninth letters of the country, in order, spell a former competitor of that brand. Name the country and the brands. --NPR Puzzle Sunday 7/18/21

If laziness was an Olympic sport, I'd come in fourth so I would have to walk up to the podium. / A shrimp was somehow trapped in the Olympic Swimming Pool. He finished third and they gave him a Prawns Medal.

...........This summer I did the backstroke.........Loudon Wainwright III …..The Swimming Song

^^^^ Adobe said that pajama sales soared 143 percent in April compared to March, while sales of pants dropped 13 percent and bra sales took a 12 percent hit.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The only reason the pyramids exist in Egypt is because they were too heavy for the English folks to put in the British Museum. --Submitted by Elephant Spiritual

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: MechaCon Omega – One Last Time (23-25, New Orleans) MechaCon ~~A little background, actually, the final MechaCon was scheduled for last year but because of the pandemic, this is it's second last year.

Actual Science Conference of the Week: Human and Physical Geography Conference (22-23, Rome) a premier interdisciplinary platform for researchers, practitioners and educators International Conference on Human and Physical Geography ICHPG001 in July 2021 in Rome (waset.org)

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Saudi Arabia --> Audi and Saab

The International Olympic Committee refused to consider Bangkok for the games. They thought all events might end in Thais. / The Russian COVID Vaccine, Sputnik, is 91.6% effective. It is also the only COVID vaccine that will help you win an Olympic event.

..........Get up, get up, put your body in motion.........The Wiseguys …..Start The Commotion

^^^^^ While stores sell tons of pajamas these days, sleeping in your birthday suit is still popular. For example, in the UK, 47 percent of men sleep in absolutely nothing (while only 17 percent of British women go nude at night). Americans, on the other hand, are just slightly more conservative. About 31 percent of men in the United States sleep naked and 14 percent of women go nude.

My Own Writing of the Week: My generation of women were first formally introduced to sex by Kotex (or maybe it was Modess). In the fourth or fifth grade the girls were taken from the room and shown a movie on menstruation. The heart of the film, basically, was to remind us that we must NEVER let anyone (especially males) know that we were actually bleeding. It told us to be embarrassed by our bodies and their functions. It trained us to consider the male ego more important than our bodies and their functions. It offered us a consumer solution to our shame. What a scam. And we were sent back to our class with a little booklet with pictures of our insides inside it. --From: Always Surrender: Memories, observations, micro-stories, fantasies, and lies from my life as an insurgent in the sexual revolution

Extreme Topiary of the Week:

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When you don't want history of slavery taught but do want confederate monuments preserved, that's call Hypocritical Race Theory. --Submitted by mm of ia

Today's Peace of History, July 23, 1967: The Detroit Rebellion began when folks were angry at loss of jobs and, especially, at the abusive and virtually all-white police department. The rebellion lasted 6 day. In the end 43 were known dead, 347 were injured, 3800 had been arrested and 1000 families were left homeless.

Procrastinators like me aren't allowed in the Olympics. They only take amateurcrastinators. / Several of my friends are head over heels about Break-dancing being added to the games.

..........Those cats were fast as lightning.........Carl Douglas …..Kung Fu Fighting

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle July 23, 2021,Gold Medal ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047

Moonbeam: I'm so happy, I think I'll dress up like J Edgar Hoover and sing show tunes. --Don Imus

Cost of War:

As of 7/22/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,149,388,895,676.

As of 7/15/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $3,147,397,871,219.

As of 7/22/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,049,671,999,548.

As of 7/15/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,048,319,021,844.

As of 7/22/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $869,244,719,365.

As of 7/15/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $867,543,995,491.

As of 7/22/21 Veterans Care since 2001: $353,191.959,725.

As of 7/15/21 Veterans Care since 2001: $352,805.473,957.

As of 7/22/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,421,499,186,957.

As of 7/15/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $5,416,067,223,286.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

You can hate a man for many reasons. Color isn't one of them. --Peewee Reese

Famous Last Words: ...help me, ooh. --Help the song

..........And we'll keep on fighting to the end.........Queen …..We Are The Champions

A fencer born in France but raised in the US can compete for either country in the Olympics. It's called duel citizenship. / Is plate throwing really an Olympic sport? Discuss

May Peace be your stamina

And Joy be your strength

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh: Happy Birthday, Gluyas!