Famous First Words: O what can ail thee, knight-at-arms, alone and palely loitering? John Keats La Belle Dame San Merci
A witch ought never to be frightened in the darkest forest, Granny Weatherwax had always said, because she should be sure in her soul that the most terrifying thing in the forest was her. --Terry Prachett Δ My Jack-o-Lantern is so fat; he's a carved plumpkin.
There's just some magic in truth and honesty and openness. --Frank Ocean
..........On a misbegotten, moonless night..........Don Henley …..Miss Ghost
Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get. --Kinky Friedman
It is a cool (38°F) Halloween Friday. The sky is clear and blue and not at all scary; and the willow tree moves more from bird darting than from wind. Birdsong, however, is absent and the world is nearly silent. Puck has been out, had some breakfast, and is now fast asleep under my desk (and feet). I only saw Veronica when she sat on the kitchen counter to help me make my coffee. Now I'm sipping that coffee, munching a small cinnamon roll, and listening to the dog snore and moan. A stick of sandalwood incense rounds out my sensual stimulation and I sit down to my favorite work – writing to you.
Hope Your weekend is blessed by the Great Pumpkin, mortals.
First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Dear Great Pumpkin, Please do something about your evil cousin. Sincerely, Linus
Tarantula blood...scorpion tail...rat intestines...KALE? Δ It's called Spooky Water. It's like normal water but it has boos in it.
Honesty is more than not lying. It is truth telling, truth speaking, truth living, and truth loving. --James E Faust
..........Something evil's lurking in the dark.........Michael Jackson …..Thriller
Trivia Questions:
How many pounds of candy corn are produced each year?
When did Trick or Treat for UNICEF begin and/or is it still running?
Which ancient Roman Goddess is said to be honored on Halloween?
Where is the longest commercial haunted house located?
What sort of mask does Michael Myers wear in the original Halloween?
Big Hello: Musta? - Tagalog (Philippines) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm
Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Who needs Halloween makeup when you already have the dark eye circles and the half deal look. --Thunder Dungeon
Halloween Treat of the Week: They found water on Mars and immediately left dirty dishes in it. --Submitted by Club42
Image of the Week: Costume of the week
Insult of the Week: He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up. --Paul Keating
Fall and Winter are coming up, it's time for Cold Spells. Δ First Vlad the Vampire drank drunk-blood and so he was stumbling around. Then he thought more blood might help so he bit into the first person he found alone. It was a snowman. Next the snowman began running around time biting everything and everybody. It was a frostbite epidemic.
The greatest truth is honesty, and the greatest falsehood is dishonesty. --Abu Bakr
..........An invisible man sleeping in your bed.........Ray Parker Jr …..Ghostbusters Theme
Moonbeam: I'd much rather wear out than rust out. --Dan Rather
Blasphemy of the Week: What if Jesus was serious?
Coffee Joke of the Week: My morning coffee was so strong it poured its own cream.
Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If someone is hotter than you then you are cooler than them. --Thermodynamics ----Submitted by LanguageNerds
Halloween Treat 2 of the Week: The fact that the Louvre heist didn't take place at dawn, but at the very reasonable hour of 9:30 am, shows that even French jewel thieves have a better work-life balance than us. --thelesliegaar --Submitted by Laughing Librarian
Hag Hannah cast a spell on her roomba. She complained that it was slow and kept bashing into things. Δ My Jack-o-Lantern is so beautiful. I call her gourdgeous.
The high road is always respected. Honesty and integrity are always rewarded. --Scott Hamilton
..........The devil's on his way.........Stevie Wonder …..Superstition
1) 35 million pounds of candy corn is manufactured every year – amounting to about 9 billion pieces.
Almanac: It is Friday, October 31, 2025. The moon reached its first quarter on Wednesday (10/29) and is in Pisces. The United Nations has declared this UNICEF (United Nations International Children Emergency Fund) Day. Today is Halloween aka All Hallows Eve, Beggars' Night, Books for Treats Day, Chucky, The Killer Doll Day, Girl Scout Founder's Day, Magic Day aka National Magic Day, National Caramel Apple Day, National Doorbell Day, National Knock-Knock Jokes Day, Samhain, World Cities Day, and World Savings Day. Because it is the last Friday in October it is also Frankenstein Friday and International Bandanna Day.
Among those born on this day were Jan Vermeer (1632), John Keats (1795), Juliette Gordon Low (1860), Ethel Waters (1896), Dale Evans (1912), Barbara Bel Geddes (1922), Hicks B. Waldron (1923), Dan Rather (1931), Michael Landon (1937), Tom Paxton (1937), David Ogden Stiers (1942), Kinky Friedman (1944), John Candy and Jane Pauley (1950), and Vanilla Ice (1968).
On October thirty-first Luther posted his 95 theses (1517), Nevada became the 36th state (1864), Mussolini became the premier of Italy (1922), Brooklyn ended streetcar service (1956), and Johnson ordered a halt to all naval attacks on North Vietnam (1968).
Night Sky, 10/31: The moon is void of course at 1:15 am and enters Pisces at 7:46 am.
Fraternal Picture of the Week: Farm Fresh Great Grandsons
Halloween Treat 3 of the Week: You're a ghost. I suspected it the minute you came through the door.
This Week: Saturday, November 1 – Bison Day & Dia de Los Muertos & Forgiveness and Happiness Day
Daylight Saving Time Ends – set your clock back one hour
Sunday, November 2 – Zero Tasking Day & Cookie Monster's Birthday & All Souls Day
Night Sky, 11/2: Sunrise: 6:30 am, Sunset: 5:19 pm Moonrise: 3:31 pm, Moonset: 3:11 am
Monday, November 3 – Cliché Day & Public Television Day & Sandwich Day & World Jellyfish Day
Night Sky, 11/3 : Southern Taurid meteor shower shoots about five fireballs per hour tonight
Tuesday, November 4 – Election Day & Use Your Common Sense Day & National Professional Paint Contractors Day
Wednesday, November 5 – Firewood Day & Play Monopoly Day & National Medical Cannabis Day
Night Sky, 11/5: Moon is full at 1:19 am in Taurus.
Thursday, November 6 – Domino Day & International Day of Medical Physics & Love Your Lawyer Day
Wiccan Wanda got a job at the Hex Support Hotline...lots of spelling questions. Δ Ghosts have to wear whatever they were wearing when they died. Those ghosts in sheets either died in bed and got caught in the duvet or died trying to fold a fitted sheet.
All religions try to benefit people, with the same basic message of the need for love and compassion, for justice and honesty, for contentment. --Dalai Lama
..........That it's strange, so strange..........Donovan …..Season Of The Witch
2) Trick of Treat for UNICEF was founded in 1950. Yes, you can still Trick or Treat for UNICEF.
Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Here's a thought – people with multiple personalities should donate one of them to people who don't have one.
Halloween Treat 4 of the Week: I told my boss, “I'm coming in on Halloween as a ghost, I'll be there you just won't see me. --The Cantrell Show --Submitted by sb of ks
Moonbeam: Journalists should denounce government by public opinion polls. --Dan Rather
Fun Fact of the Week: A pumpkin is actually a fruit, not a vegetable. Anything that starts from a single flower – as a pumpkin does – is classified botanically as a “simple fruit”.
Video of the Week: Dancing Skeletons (the original 1929 cartoon, 5:31) https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2z67ds
The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount. --Kinky Friedman
The true measure of life is not length, but honesty. --John Lyly
For your own safety, do not tell a witch that old joke about driving a stick. Δ My dentist neighbor gives our chocolate flavored dental floss at Halloween.
..........ghosts in the sheets.........Beyonce …..Haunted
3) Pomona, the goddess of fruit and trees—is honored on Halloween by bobbing for apples.
Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: In the Cosmic Library, Earth is shelved under Comedy. --Submitted by Club42
Halloween Treat 5 of the Week: Oh, no!!! You're turning into a vampire and I haven't even bitten you yet. That's premature edraculation.
Weird Word of the Week: Ineffable: Something that is beyond words or description, often used to describe a profound experience or feeling. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/ineffable ~~Different than unf*able.
Dragon of the Week:
Wacky Uses for Common Products: Kill poison ivy. Spraying full-strength Clorox Bleach on poison ivy kills the plant. Fill a trigger-spray bottle with the liquid and – wearing goggles, a mask, rubber gloves, long pants, and a long sleeved shirt – spray the poison ivy. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox3.html ~~It sounds like it might also kill you, your pets, your offspring, and half the foliage in the county. Think this through.
Your conscience is the measure of the honesty of your selfishness. Listen to it carefully. --Richard Bach
Hexen Hazel opened a garage for witches...repair, respell, restraw. She called it The Broom Closet. Δ Don't let your jack-o-lantern drink. When pumpkins get smashed, they are worthless.
...........And although I know it's strictly taboo..........Frank Sinatra …..Witchcraft
4) The Haunted Cave in Lewisburg, OH is a whopping 3, 564 feet long. It's also located 80 feet underground. https://hauntedcaveatlewisburg.com/
Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cackle maniacally and the world backs away from you slowly. --My Witches
Halloween Treat 6 of the Week: That new Japanese restaurant has a zombie who does nothing but stir-fry. You'll recognize him immediately, he's the dead man woking.
Protest Sign of the Week: Viagra Causes Autism
Better Protest Sign of the Week: Make America Constitutional Again
Best Protest Sign of the Week: Pay Us Enough We'll Stop Protesting
Science Fiction Convention of the Week: MileHiCon 57 (10/31-11/2, Aurora, CO) ...authors, artists, speakers... https://milehicon.org/ ~~It being Halloween, I assumed they must have great costume events, this is the gallery: https://milehicon.org/cosplay-gallery/
FYI of the Week: Hey! Hallowe'en is right around the corner... DON'T BUY NESTLE TREATS Nestle steals water from First Nations.
FYI of the Week2: Union Made Candies: Hershey’s Nuggets & Kisses :Kit Kat : Butterfinger : Baby Ruth : Smarties : Jawbreakers : Sour Patch Kids : Tootsie Rolls : York Peppermint Patties : Jolly Ranchers : Bit-O-Honey : Mary Jane Peanut Butter Chews : Ghirardelli Chocolate Squares : Jelly Belly : Red Vines : Hostess : Tastykake : Annebelle's Candy Company : Boyer Candy Co : Roca : Tootsie Roll Industries : See's. NOT unionized: Brach's and Mar's
Spark of Joy of the Week: Put a crystal in your bra, dab on some essential oil, do a hot girl hair flip, and seduce the Universe today, you sexy bish. @sacredspacerevolution --Submitted by The Feral Spiritualists
The real honest man is honest from conviction of what is right, not from policy. --Robert E Lee
Well, it could be my age but that new electric broom is too noisy for me. Δ The president is so orange they're calling him Donald Trumpkin.
..........Their brands were still on fire and their hooves were made of steel.........Marty Robbins (Ghost) Riders In The Sky
5) Because the studio had such a small budget for Halloween, they had to use the cheapest mask they could find. It was a $2 William Shatner mask that was spray-painted white. ~~Sorry, it was too funny to pass up.
Dragon of the Week II:
Quote of the Week: The windmills are driving the whales crazy, obviously.” --his MAGAsty ~~from Jimmy Kimmel's 78 nicknames https://lamag.com/politics/read-jimmy-kimmels-78-hilarious-nicknames-for-donald-trump-on-his-78th-birthday/
Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Some lady dressed as catwoman is walking around our Halloween party just knocking drinks off tables. --@Grant Tanaka
Today's Peace of History: October 31, 1829: George Henry Evans, an English-born printer and journalist, published the first issue of the Working Man’s Advocate, “edited by a Mechanic” for the “useful and industrious classes” of New York City. Evan covered the Workingmen’s Party (which he helped found) and the early trade union movement.
Empathy is important, openness, honesty, and an understanding for others.. --Niko Kovac
I found a place that sells instant toad urine. But instead of turning the guy into a toad, the spell turned him into a Russian prostitute. Δ Gracie Ghost became a rock star with her haunting tones and wailing tunes.
..........He's the hairy-handed gent who ran amok in Kent.........Warren Zevon …..Werewolves of London
Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, October 31, 2025, All Hallowed ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.
Moonbeam: Don't taunt the alligator until after you've crossed the creek. --Dan Rather
Cost of War:
As of 10/30/25 State Department Costs: $278,445,558,697
As of 10/23/25 State Department Costs: $277,861,848,836
As of 10/30/25 Homeland Security: $1,214,156,435,701
As of 10/23/25 Homeland Security: $1,213,522,424,837
As of 10/30/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,336,830,953,270
As of 10/23/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,335,200,653,804
As of 10/30/25 Military Costs: $3,174,686,867,507
As of 10/23/25 Military Costs: $3,173,448,757,763
As of 10/30/25 Veterans Care: $4,558,781,983,519
As of 10/23/25 Veterans Care: $4,546,424,796,814
As of 10/30/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,562,903,231,758
As of 10/23/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,546,462,445,659
https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/
We've got to clear some of the rooms out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians. --Kinky Friedman
Famous Last Words: Please stay on the line. Godot will be with you shortly...
..........It was a graveyard smash.........Bobby Pickett …..Monster Mash
The elegance of honesty needs no adornment. --Mary Browne
Crone Corrie opened a potions drive-thru. Seems witches from all over town were sick and tired of homemade eye of newt stew. Δ Bewitch ya next week.
May Peace be your trick
And Joy be your treat
prairie mama
christine
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