All Hallowed ePistle

 Famous First Words: O what can ail thee, knight-at-arms, alone and palely loitering? John Keats La Belle Dame San Merci

A witch ought never to be frightened in the darkest forest, Granny Weatherwax had always said, because she should be sure in her soul that the most terrifying thing in the forest was her. --Terry Prachett Δ My Jack-o-Lantern is so fat; he's a carved plumpkin.

There's just some magic in truth and honesty and openness. --Frank Ocean

..........On a misbegotten, moonless night..........Don Henley …..Miss Ghost

Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get. --Kinky Friedman

It is a cool (38°F) Halloween Friday. The sky is clear and blue and not at all scary; and the willow tree moves more from bird darting than from wind. Birdsong, however, is absent and the world is nearly silent. Puck has been out, had some breakfast, and is now fast asleep under my desk (and feet). I only saw Veronica when she sat on the kitchen counter to help me make my coffee. Now I'm sipping that coffee, munching a small cinnamon roll, and listening to the dog snore and moan. A stick of sandalwood incense rounds out my sensual stimulation and I sit down to my favorite work – writing to you.

Hope Your weekend is blessed by the Great Pumpkin, mortals.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Dear Great Pumpkin, Please do something about your evil cousin. Sincerely, Linus

Tarantula blood...scorpion tail...rat intestines...KALE? Δ It's called Spooky Water. It's like normal water but it has boos in it.

Honesty is more than not lying. It is truth telling, truth speaking, truth living, and truth loving. --James E Faust

..........Something evil's lurking in the dark.........Michael Jackson …..Thriller

Trivia Questions:

1. How many pounds of candy corn are produced each year?

2. When did Trick or Treat for UNICEF begin and/or is it still running?

3. Which ancient Roman Goddess is said to be honored on Halloween?

4. Where is the longest commercial haunted house located?

5. What sort of mask does Michael Myers wear in the original Halloween?

Big Hello: Musta? - Tagalog (Philippines) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Who needs Halloween makeup when you already have the dark eye circles and the half deal look. --Thunder Dungeon

Halloween Treat of the Week: They found water on Mars and immediately left dirty dishes in it. --Submitted by Club42

Image of the Week: Costume of the week

Insult of the Week: He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up. --Paul Keating

Fall and Winter are coming up, it's time for Cold Spells. Δ First Vlad the Vampire drank drunk-blood and so he was stumbling around. Then he thought more blood might help so he bit into the first person he found alone. It was a snowman. Next the snowman began running around time biting everything and everybody. It was a frostbite epidemic.

The greatest truth is honesty, and the greatest falsehood is dishonesty. --Abu Bakr

..........An invisible man sleeping in your bed.........Ray Parker Jr …..Ghostbusters Theme

Moonbeam: I'd much rather wear out than rust out. --Dan Rather

Blasphemy of the Week: What if Jesus was serious?

Coffee Joke of the Week: My morning coffee was so strong it poured its own cream.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If someone is hotter than you then you are cooler than them. --Thermodynamics ----Submitted by LanguageNerds

Halloween Treat 2 of the Week: The fact that the Louvre heist didn't take place at dawn, but at the very reasonable hour of 9:30 am, shows that even French jewel thieves have a better work-life balance than us. --thelesliegaar --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Hag Hannah cast a spell on her roomba. She complained that it was slow and kept bashing into things. Δ My Jack-o-Lantern is so beautiful. I call her gourdgeous.

The high road is always respected. Honesty and integrity are always rewarded. --Scott Hamilton

..........The devil's on his way.........Stevie Wonder …..Superstition

1) 35 million pounds of candy corn is manufactured every year – amounting to about 9 billion pieces.

Almanac: It is Friday, October 31, 2025. The moon reached its first quarter on Wednesday (10/29) and is in Pisces. The United Nations has declared this UNICEF (United Nations International Children Emergency Fund) Day. Today is Halloween aka All Hallows Eve, Beggars' Night, Books for Treats Day, Chucky, The Killer Doll Day, Girl Scout Founder's Day, Magic Day aka National Magic Day, National Caramel Apple Day, National Doorbell Day, National Knock-Knock Jokes Day, Samhain, World Cities Day, and World Savings Day. Because it is the last Friday in October it is also Frankenstein Friday and International Bandanna Day.

Among those born on this day were Jan Vermeer (1632), John Keats (1795), Juliette Gordon Low (1860), Ethel Waters (1896), Dale Evans (1912), Barbara Bel Geddes (1922), Hicks B. Waldron (1923), Dan Rather (1931), Michael Landon (1937), Tom Paxton (1937), David Ogden Stiers (1942), Kinky Friedman (1944), John Candy and Jane Pauley (1950), and Vanilla Ice (1968).

On October thirty-first Luther posted his 95 theses (1517), Nevada became the 36th state (1864), Mussolini became the premier of Italy (1922), Brooklyn ended streetcar service (1956), and Johnson ordered a halt to all naval attacks on North Vietnam (1968).

Night Sky, 10/31: The moon is void of course at 1:15 am and enters Pisces at 7:46 am.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Farm Fresh Great Grandsons

Halloween Treat 3 of the Week: You're a ghost. I suspected it the minute you came through the door.

This Week: Saturday, November 1 – Bison Day & Dia de Los Muertos & Forgiveness and Happiness Day

Daylight Saving Time Ends – set your clock back one hour

Sunday, November 2 – Zero Tasking Day & Cookie Monster's Birthday & All Souls Day

Night Sky, 11/2: Sunrise: 6:30 am, Sunset: 5:19 pm Moonrise: 3:31 pm, Moonset: 3:11 am

Monday, November 3 – Cliché Day & Public Television Day & Sandwich Day & World Jellyfish Day

Night Sky, 11/3 : Southern Taurid meteor shower shoots about five fireballs per hour tonight

Tuesday, November 4 – Election Day & Use Your Common Sense Day & National Professional Paint Contractors Day

Wednesday, November 5 – Firewood Day & Play Monopoly Day & National Medical Cannabis Day

Night Sky, 11/5: Moon is full at 1:19 am in Taurus.

Thursday, November 6 – Domino Day & International Day of Medical Physics & Love Your Lawyer Day

Wiccan Wanda got a job at the Hex Support Hotline...lots of spelling questions. Δ Ghosts have to wear whatever they were wearing when they died. Those ghosts in sheets either died in bed and got caught in the duvet or died trying to fold a fitted sheet.

All religions try to benefit people, with the same basic message of the need for love and compassion, for justice and honesty, for contentment. --Dalai Lama

..........That it's strange, so strange..........Donovan …..Season Of The Witch

2) Trick of Treat for UNICEF was founded in 1950. Yes, you can still Trick or Treat for UNICEF.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Here's a thought – people with multiple personalities should donate one of them to people who don't have one.

Halloween Treat 4 of the Week: I told my boss, “I'm coming in on Halloween as a ghost, I'll be there you just won't see me. --The Cantrell Show --Submitted by sb of ks

Moonbeam: Journalists should denounce government by public opinion polls. --Dan Rather

Fun Fact of the Week: A pumpkin is actually a fruit, not a vegetable. Anything that starts from a single flower – as a pumpkin does – is classified botanically as a “simple fruit”.

Video of the Week: Dancing Skeletons (the original 1929 cartoon, 5:31) https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x2z67ds

The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount. --Kinky Friedman

The true measure of life is not length, but honesty. --John Lyly

For your own safety, do not tell a witch that old joke about driving a stick. Δ My dentist neighbor gives our chocolate flavored dental floss at Halloween.

..........ghosts in the sheets.........Beyonce …..Haunted

3) Pomona, the goddess of fruit and trees—is honored on Halloween by bobbing for apples.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: In the Cosmic Library, Earth is shelved under Comedy. --Submitted by Club42

Halloween Treat 5 of the Week: Oh, no!!! You're turning into a vampire and I haven't even bitten you yet. That's premature edraculation.

Weird Word of the Week: Ineffable: Something that is beyond words or description, often used to describe a profound experience or feeling. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/ineffable ~~Different than unf*able.

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Kill poison ivy. Spraying full-strength Clorox Bleach on poison ivy kills the plant. Fill a trigger-spray bottle with the liquid and – wearing goggles, a mask, rubber gloves, long pants, and a long sleeved shirt – spray the poison ivy. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox3.html ~~It sounds like it might also kill you, your pets, your offspring, and half the foliage in the county. Think this through.

Your conscience is the measure of the honesty of your selfishness. Listen to it carefully. --Richard Bach

Hexen Hazel opened a garage for witches...repair, respell, restraw. She called it The Broom Closet. Δ Don't let your jack-o-lantern drink. When pumpkins get smashed, they are worthless.

...........And although I know it's strictly taboo..........Frank Sinatra …..Witchcraft

4) The Haunted Cave in Lewisburg, OH is a whopping 3, 564 feet long. It's also located 80 feet underground. https://hauntedcaveatlewisburg.com/

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cackle maniacally and the world backs away from you slowly. --My Witches

Halloween Treat 6 of the Week: That new Japanese restaurant has a zombie who does nothing but stir-fry. You'll recognize him immediately, he's the dead man woking.

Protest Sign of the Week: Viagra Causes Autism

Better Protest Sign of the Week: Make America Constitutional Again

Best Protest Sign of the Week: Pay Us Enough We'll Stop Protesting

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: MileHiCon 57 (10/31-11/2, Aurora, CO) ...authors, artists, speakers... https://milehicon.org/ ~~It being Halloween, I assumed they must have great costume events, this is the gallery: https://milehicon.org/cosplay-gallery/

FYI of the Week: Hey! Hallowe'en is right around the corner... DON'T BUY NESTLE TREATS Nestle steals water from First Nations.

FYI of the Week²: Union Made Candies: Hershey’s Nuggets & Kisses :Kit Kat : Butterfinger : Baby Ruth : Smarties : Jawbreakers : Sour Patch Kids : Tootsie Rolls : York Peppermint Patties : Jolly Ranchers : Bit-O-Honey : Mary Jane Peanut Butter Chews : Ghirardelli Chocolate Squares : Jelly Belly : Red Vines : Hostess : Tastykake : Annebelle's Candy Company : Boyer Candy Co : Roca : Tootsie Roll Industries : See's. NOT unionized: Brach's and Mar's

Spark of Joy of the Week: Put a crystal in your bra, dab on some essential oil, do a hot girl hair flip, and seduce the Universe today, you sexy bish. @sacredspacerevolution --Submitted by The Feral Spiritualists

The real honest man is honest from conviction of what is right, not from policy. --Robert E Lee

Well, it could be my age but that new electric broom is too noisy for me. Δ The president is so orange they're calling him Donald Trumpkin.

..........Their brands were still on fire and their hooves were made of steel.........Marty Robbins (Ghost) Riders In The Sky

5) Because the studio had such a small budget for Halloween, they had to use the cheapest mask they could find. It was a $2 William Shatner mask that was spray-painted white. ~~Sorry, it was too funny to pass up.

Dragon of the Week II:

Quote of the Week: The windmills are driving the whales crazy, obviously.” --his MAGAsty ~~from Jimmy Kimmel's 78 nicknames https://lamag.com/politics/read-jimmy-kimmels-78-hilarious-nicknames-for-donald-trump-on-his-78th-birthday/

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Some lady dressed as catwoman is walking around our Halloween party just knocking drinks off tables. --@Grant Tanaka

Today's Peace of History: October 31, 1829: George Henry Evans, an English-born printer and journalist, published the first issue of the Working Man’s Advocate, “edited by a Mechanic” for the “useful and industrious classes” of New York City. Evan covered the Workingmen’s Party (which he helped found) and the early trade union movement.

Empathy is important, openness, honesty, and an understanding for others.. --Niko Kovac

I found a place that sells instant toad urine. But instead of turning the guy into a toad, the spell turned him into a Russian prostitute. Δ Gracie Ghost became a rock star with her haunting tones and wailing tunes.

..........He's the hairy-handed gent who ran amok in Kent.........Warren Zevon …..Werewolves of London

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, October 31, 2025, All Hallowed ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Don't taunt the alligator until after you've crossed the creek. --Dan Rather

Cost of War:

As of 10/30/25 State Department Costs: $278,445,558,697

As of 10/23/25 State Department Costs: $277,861,848,836

As of 10/30/25 Homeland Security: $1,214,156,435,701

As of 10/23/25 Homeland Security: $1,213,522,424,837

As of 10/30/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,336,830,953,270

As of 10/23/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,335,200,653,804

As of 10/30/25 Military Costs: $3,174,686,867,507

As of 10/23/25 Military Costs: $3,173,448,757,763

As of 10/30/25 Veterans Care: $4,558,781,983,519

As of 10/23/25 Veterans Care: $4,546,424,796,814

As of 10/30/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,562,903,231,758

As of 10/23/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,546,462,445,659

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

We've got to clear some of the rooms out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians. --Kinky Friedman

Famous Last Words: Please stay on the line. Godot will be with you shortly...

..........It was a graveyard smash.........Bobby Pickett …..Monster Mash

The elegance of honesty needs no adornment. --Mary Browne

Crone Corrie opened a potions drive-thru. Seems witches from all over town were sick and tired of homemade eye of newt stew. Δ Bewitch ya next week.

May Peace be your trick

And Joy be your treat

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

ePistle Orates

Famous First Words: An Act to establish a Constitution... Constitution of South Australia (1855-6)

Happy Freedom Of Speech Day! I had a great joke about freedom of speech, but the government stole it. /\ Freedom of speech means you can say what you think without thinking.

It is only in sorrow that bad weather masters us; in joy we face the storm and defy it. --Amelia Barr

..........Then the sudden smell of burning flesh.........Billie Holiday …..Strange Fruit c. 1940 ~~All of today's songs have been banned by somebody at some time.

All ... shall be restor'd ... Honour, Renown, Liberty of Conscience, Rights and Privileges, which they enjoy'd before the above said Disorders. --From the The Treaty of Westphalia

It is a rainy Friday morning. The sun is not due up for another half hour and there is no natural light shining outside my window. If I put my face to the glass I can see by the ghostly street lamp on someone else's street. I see a child's playground damp, empty, and sad looking. It is the sound of the rain that fills the senses; plinking on the chimney, plunking on the patio table, thudding against the concrete. Puck stayed out only long enough and still came in quite wet. Veronica did go out at all. I brewed coffee and listened to the drops beating rhythm to a melody in my head. When I turn to look out expecting the lazy sun to begin its job, all I see is a reflection of Mary Coral's iris painting floating in the dark. I am tempted to take to my recliner and let the tap tap tap put me back to sleep, but I have appointments and errands and I really want to write to you. So, I raise my cup of decaf to you, enjoy the morning, friends – whatever it is bringing you.

Hope your weekend pops like a Champagne cork, Champagne of Friends.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Billionaires create wealth the way ticks create blood. --Music for Deep Meditation

How dare you respond to my freedom of speech with your freedom of speech. \/ Free speech isn't cheap.

Find ecstasy in life; the mere sense of living is joy enough. --Emily Dickinson

..........We fell asleep, our goose is cooked, our reputation is shot..........The Everly Brothers …..Wake Up Little Susie. c.1957

Trivia Questions: Happy Champagne Day!

1. How fast does a Champagne cork travel when it's popped?

2. What is the greatest distance a Champagne cork has traveled?

3. How many bubbles does a standard bottle of Champagne (75cl) contain?

4. How many bottles of Champagne are produced each year?

5. Champagne: More bubbly in a flute or in a coupe?

Big Hello: Caлam – Tabassaran (Northeast Caucasian language spoken in Dagestan) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: You know what's not cool, Bobby? Telling people to be themselves and then hating them for being themselves. --Hank Hill

Image of the Week: You have the right to remain silent. But I recommend that you don't. --CJ Brune

Advice of the Week: To improve your posture, pretend you are shooting lasers out of your nipples and trying to shoot people in the head.

Freeze ICE Cream! Not Speech! /\ Too many people confuse “freedom of speech” with “saying stupid shit”. --*uckology

Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it. --Greg Anderson

..........He was sittin' in the witness stand.........Chuck Berry …..Brown Eyed Handsome Man c. 1957

Moonbeam: I have often endeavored to view the circulation of the blood in terrestrial animals, but with success, by reason that no parts of their bodies w3ere sufficiently transparent. --Antonie van Leeuwenhoek

Blasphemy of the Week: So, what are you now? Believer? Agnostic? Atheist? Or what? I'm belief-fluid.

Coffee Joke of the Week: When you italicize the word Coffee you get Espresso.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: You know what doesn't cause autism? Releasing the Epstein files. --Gavin Newsom

Without Freedom of Speech how would we know who the idiots are? \/ The right to speak freely does not include the right to be taken seriously, and it certainly doesn't include the obligation that others must supply you with a platform.

Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy. --Leo Buscaglia

..........Why don't you all just f-f-ade away.........The Who …..My Generation c. 1965

1) A Champagne cork can reach 23.6 miles/hour. This is due to the Champagne being under a lot of pressure, which pushes the cork out when the wire cage is removed.

Almanac: It is Friday, October 24, 2025. The moon was new last Tuesday (10/21) and is in Sagittarius. Today is United Nations Day aka Dia de las Naciones Unidas, Food Day, Recycle Your Mercury, Thermostat Day, and World Development Information Day. Because it is the 4th Friday it is also Champagne Day.

Among those born on this day were Antony van Leeuwenhoek (1632), Moss Hart (1904), Y.A. Tittle (1926), David Nelson (1936), Bill Wyman (1936), and Kevin Kline (1947).

On October twenty fourth the Hevelius' Mundane Era began (3963 BCE), the 30 years war ended in the Peace of Westphalia (1648), South Australia adopted its constitution (1856), the first transcontinental telegram was sent (1861), the George Washington bridge opened (1931), the 40 hour work week went into effect (1940), the U.N. charter became effective (1945), Zambia became independent (1964), Steffi Graf played her first pro tennis match (1984), and Rev. Jim Bakker was sentenced to 50 years for fraud (1989).

Night Sky, 10/24: Sunrise 7:40 am, Sunset 6:30 pm … Moonrise 10:53 am, Moonset 7:59 pm

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Mauve Haired Max and Joyful Protester Ollie

  

This Week: Saturday, October 25 – American Frog Day & International Artists Day & Sourest Day

Sunday, October 26 - Mother-in-Law Day & Mule Day & Howl At The Moon Night

Night Sky, 10/26: The Perseus Double Cluster (NGC 869 and NGC 884) will be well placed for viewing shortly after sunset.

Monday, October 27 – Black Cat Day & Cranky Co-workers Day & National Civics Day

Night Sky, 10/27: The thick, waxing crescent moon passes below and near touches the star Tau Sagittarii during twilight.

Tuesday, October 28 – International Animation Day & National Internal Medicine Day & National First Responders Day

Wednesday, October 29 – National Cat Day & National Hermit Day & Snowmobile Day

Night Sky, 10/29: The first quarter half-moon stands high in the southern sky at sunset.

Thursday, October 30 – National Uplift Someone Day & Speak Up For Service Day & Mischief Night aka Devil's Night

If you are going to use free speech to tell other people they can't speak freely, we're all gonna have a bad time. --South Park /\ A lot of people who say they want “free speech” actually just want to be the one in charge of which speech is free. --Hank Green

If you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment. --Carlos Santana

..........Makin' love in the green grass.........Van Morrison …..Brown Eyed Girl c. 1967

2) The longest recorded Champagne cork flight is about 177 feet. The record was set by Emeritus Heinrich Medicus in 1988 at the Woodbury Vineyards, NY.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What's the difference between Jim Jones and Donald Trump? Donald Trump would charge you for the Kool-Aid. --Trump is Evil

Moonbeam: Nothing makes an actor feel freer and more inventive and more creative than being trusted. --Kevin Kline

Fun Fact of the Week: The first transcontinental telegraph message was sent 10/24/1861 from Chief Justice Stephen J Field in San Francisco to president Abraham Lincoln in Washington, DC. The telegram mimicked Morse's first telegraph message, “What hath God wrought?”

Video of the Week: Geroge Carlin's 7 Words You Can Never Say on TV (:47)

As soon as the Treaty of Peace shall be sign'd and seal'd by the Plenipotentiarys and Ambassadors, all Hostilitys shall cease. --From the Treaty of Westphalia

The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other's life. --Richard Bach

Sure, there is freedom of speech. What there isn't is freedom after speech. \/ Exercising their right to freedom of speech, witches gathered in DC chanting “Brooms are for riding, not cleaning!” They are calling for sweeping reforms.

..........The old maternity dress I've got is going in the garbage.........Loretta Lynn …..The Pill c. 1975

3) According to scientist Bill Lembeck, there are approximately 9,800,000 bubbles in a glass of Champagne and 49 million in one bottle.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Dear Louvre Thieves: How fast do you think you could get the Epstein Files?

Weird Word of the Week: Vellichor: The strange wistfulness of used bookstores. https://www.thedictionaryofobscuresorrows.com/word/vellichor

Dragon of the Week: I was disappointed in what was being called “dragon” at the No Kings Demonstrations. They actually looked more like teenaged Teletubbies. So here's a beautiful lamp.

Funniest Dragon Thing I Read of the Week: My dragons may not be in a row, but at least they're having fun. Your dragons probably want to shoot fire at your booty for making them line up like that. --Crazy Dragon Lady

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Clean slippery moss and algae from brick or stone paths. Mix three-quarters cup Clorox Bleach in one gallon water in a bucket, and wearing rubber gloves, scrub the area to remove the moss and algae and help prevent regrowth. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox2.html

We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves. --Buddha

Advertisers: All the free speech money can buy. /\ Citizens United bought the Supreme Court to make sure their free speech was worth more than your free speech.

...........Live together in perfect harmony.........Paul McCartney & Stevie Wonder …..Ebony And Ivory c. 1985

4) 300 million bottles of Champagne are produced every year. Around 180 million are exported.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I finally found the silver lining...it's my hair.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: SpaceCon San Antonio (24-26, San Antonio, TX) Three days of POP CULTURE that's out of this world. https://www.spaceconsa.com/

FYI of the Week: Hey! Hallowe'en is right around the corner...  DON'T BUY NESTLE TREAT  Nestle steals water from First Nations.

FYI of the Week²: Union Made Candies: Hershey’s Nuggets & Kisses :Kit Kat : Butterfinger : Baby Ruth : Smarties : Jawbreakers : Sour Patch Kids : Tootsie Rolls : York Peppermint Patties : Jolly Ranchers : Bit-O-Honey : Mary Jane Peanut Butter Chews : Ghirardelli Chocolate Squares : Jelly Belly Candy Corn : Red Vines. NOT unionized: Brach's and Mar's

Spark of Joy of the Week: Toddler Power

My dear brothers and sisters, the joy we feel has little to do with the circumstances of our lives and everything to do with the focus of our lives. --Russell M Nelson

How bizarre, Disney making a Business Decision and it is NOT a Free Speech issue! \/ The problem with freedom of speech and humor is that jokes don't get cancelled, they get remembered.

..........Well I was there and I saw what you did.........Phil Collins …..In The Air Tonight c. 1991

5) The flute is the best glass to use if you want to enjoy the full effect of Champagne's bubbles. This is because the long,narrow shape helps to preserve the bubbles and keep them from escaping.

Protest Sign of the Week: Agent Orange Is Toxic

Better Protest Sign of the Week: Eggs Are So Expensive Because All The Chickens Are In Congress.

Even Better Protest Sign of the Week: I Have E-Books With More Spine Than The GOP

Best Protest Sign of the Week: Honk If You're NOT In The Epstein Files

Quote of the Week: People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use. --Søren Kierkegaard

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I tried to be a morning person, but mornings filed a restraining order. --Submitted by Club42

Today's Peace of History: October 24, 1940: The 40-hour workweek went into effect under the Fair Labor Standards Act of 1938, requiring employers to pay overtime and restricting the use of child labor. Decades of labor agitation and a considerable number of lives made this change possible. ~~My father was a union worker and he campaigned for the 40 hour week. At his first real job he worked from 8 am until midnight.

I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy. --Rabindranath Tagore

Free speech means the right to shout “theater” in a crowded fire. --Abbie Hoffman /\ One of the problems with defending free speech is you often have to defend people that you find to be outrageous and unpleasant and disgusting. --Salman Rusdie.

..........You might end up in Ethiopia.........M.I.A. …..Born Free c. 2010

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, October 24, 2025: ePistle orates. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: I'm always shy in front of an audience, so I'm always at the back, in the shadows, just doing it. I don't like the front, the adulation. --Bill Wyman (Rolling Stones, Rhythm Kings)

Cost of War:

As of 10/23/25 State Department Costs: $277,861,848,836

As of 10/16/25 State Department Costs: $277,328,789,118

As of 10/23/25 Homeland Security: $1,213,522,424,837

As of 10/16/25 Homeland Security: $1,212,943,378,066

As of 10/23/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,335,200,653,804

As of 10/16/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,333,711,645,293

As of 10/23/25 Military Costs: $3,173,448,757,763

As of 10/16/25 Military Costs: $3,172,318,159,076

As of 10/23/25 Veterans Care: $4,546,424,796,814

As of 10/16/25 Veterans Care: $4,535,137,266,715

As of 10/23/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,546,46a,445,659

As of 10/16/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,531,440,993,146

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Troops and Armys of all those who are making War in the Empire, shall be disbanded and discharg'd. --From the Treaty of Westphalia

Famous Last Words: ...one thousand nine hundred and forty-five. --The United Nations Charter

….......I will not forgive your evil.........Pussy Riot …..Putin's Ashes c. 2022

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. --Joseph Campbell

Just because you're offended doesn't mean you're right. /\ Now Leaving Designated Free Speech Zone

May Peace be your microphone

And Joy be your amplifier

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

ePistle marinara

 Famous First Words: Willy! --Linda Loman Death Of A Salesman by Arthur Miller

Today is National Pasta Day! Pasta La Vista! {} Do they serve Holy Macaroni in Vatican City? {} They never let Ravioli sit at the cool table because she was so square.

.........Then peace will guide the planets.........Fifth Dimension …..Aquarius ~~Today's songs are from the musical, Hair -–Galt MacDermot

If absolute truth belongs to anyone in this world, it certainly does not belong to the man or party that claims to possess it. --Albert Camus

It is a beautiful Friday morning. The sky is clear blue with smears of white clouds that frolic in a temperature of 67°F ...nearly perfect in every way. Puck is still asleep under my bed. Veronica is outside convinced that she is hidden in a small but growing sunflower plant. There is no birdsong when the cat is prowling or not well hidden by a youthful sunflower plant. I hear crows and barking dogs in the distance. A wind (9 mpr, from the southwest) moves the still green leaves of the willow and the still yellowing leaves of the unnamed tree. Grass is green, flowers still bloom in smaller and smaller patches. I sip my decaf and rub my bare feet across the carpet. Veronica returns and wanders towards the living room. I take my morning pills and complete the last task before the joy of writing to you. Ah, autumn in Lawrence, who can resist it?

Keep calm and pasta on, ePistlers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Mindfulness is the opposite of an out-of-body experience. You might say it's an in-body experience.

I spent my entire life savings on pasta. It was worth every penne. {} This noodle was once a piece of dough...in a pasta life.

..........Rama Rama Hare Hare.........The Fugs …..Hare Krishna

Trivia Questions: Happy Black Poets Day!

1. Do you know the name of the very first African American poet to release a book of poems in the US (1773)?

2. Pre-colonial African poetry is tricky because of the oral tradition. Do you know what these poets are called?

3. How many black US Poet Laureates can you name? There have been 5.

4. What poet and/or what poem was read at Bill Clinton's first inauguration?

5. What poet and/or what poem was read at Joe Biden's inauguration?

Big Hello: Grüezi – Swiss German https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Biologists Announce: There is absolutely nothing we can learn from clams. https://www.facebook.com/TheOnion

Mild Rant of the Week: My favorite black poet is Langston Hughes. He grew up in Lawrence so he's dear to lots of folks around here. My favorite Hughes poem is also my favorite peace poem. Give Us Our Peace

Advise of the Week: Everyone loves fried chicken. Don't ever make it. Ever. Buy it from a place that makes good fried chicken. --Nora Ephron

You're one in a gnocchilion. {} Can I make my own beefaroni by feeding spaghetti to my cow?

..........You twinkle above us, we twinkle below..........Oliver …..Good Morning, Starshine

Moonbeam: God is our father, but even more is God our mother. --Pope John Paul I

Blasphemy of the Week: Conquer evil by your gentle kindness, and make blood thirsty zealots wonder at your goodness. Allow those who treasure punishment to be put to shame by your compassion, and engage those who hate you with irritating humility. --St Isaac of Syria

Coffee Joke of the Week: I bought a new coffee maker. It tells jokes while you're waiting for your coffee. It's called the BrewHaHa.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I was at a sports bar the other day and saw there was a show called “The G Spot”. My first thought was, “Don't they want men to be able to FIND this show???” --Submitted by dr of oh

I prefer my pasta puns fresh and cheesy. {} Does Bowtie pasta ever feel overdressed?

..........LSD...LBJ...FBI...CIA..........Cast of Hair …..LBJ

1) Philllis Wheatley had her work published, titled Poems on Various Subjects in 1773. it was published when she was around 20 years old. Poems

Almanac: It is Friday, October 17, 2025. The moon will be new on Tuesday (10/21) and is in Virgo. The United Nations has declared this International Day for the Eradication of Poverty. It is also Black Poetry Day, Mulligan Day, National Edge Day, National Pasta Day, National Playing Card Collectors Day, National Nomophobia Awareness Day, Mammography Day, Pay Back A Friend Day, Wear Something Gaudy Day, and World Geothermal Energy Day.

Among those born on this day were Jupiter Hammon (1711), William "Candy" Cummings (1848), Spring Byington (1886), Irene Ryan (1903), Nathanael West (1903), Jean Arthur (1905), Pope John Paul I (1912), Arthur Miller (1915), Rita Hayworth (1919), Montgomery Clift (1920), Tom Poston (1921), Evel Knievel (1938), Gary Puckett (1942), Michael McKean (1947), Margot Kidder (1948), Mae Jemison (1957), and Eminem (1972).

On October seventeenth Bessemer patented his steelmaking process (1855), the Luxembourg Constitution became effective (1868), Yugoslavia proclaimed itself a republic (1918), Einstein arrived in the USA (1933), Albert Camus won the Nobel Prize in Literature (1957), and Hair debutted (1967).

Night Sky, 10/17: The E-Geminid meteor shower: chance of seeing meteors whenever the Gemini constellation is above the horizon. Tonight – early tomorrow. https://in-the-sky.org/news.php?id=20251018_10_100

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Real Magic

This Week: Saturday, October 18 – Bridge Day & Newspaper Comic Strip Appreciation Day & Sweetest Day

Sunday, October 19 – Evaluate Your Life Day & World Statistics Day & World Toy Camera Day

Night Sky, 10/19: This week, Jupiter rises around midnight. Look for Jupiter in the east around 2 am. It will reach opposition on January 10, 2026. As we continue towards this date, Jupiter will continue to rise earlier each week.

Monday, October 20 – Diwali & International Chef's Day & Lung Health Day

Night Sky, 10/20: Comet Lemmon has or is about to become visible without binoculars. It gets brighter as the month goes along. Keep in mind, comets are notoriously unpredictable. https://earthsky.org/space/comet-lemmon-best-comet-of-2025-finder-maps/

Tuesday, October 21 – Reptile Awareness Day & National Witch Hazel Day

Night Sky, 10/21: New moon in Libra at 3:42 pm

Wednesday, October 22 – International Stuttering Awareness Day & Make A Dog's Day Day & Smart Is Cool Day

Thursday, October 23 – Disabled Women's Equal Pay Day & National Mole Day & TV Talk Show Host Day

Night Sky, 10/23: Sunrise 7:39 am Sunset 6:31 pm Moonrise 9:52 am Moonset 7:21 pm

Good friends should stick together like unrinsed spaghetti. {} My pasta themed opera was a huge sauce-cess.

..........I got my hair, I got my head, I got my brains.........Nina Simone …..I Got Life

2) Griot (grē-,ō): any of a class of musician-entertainers of western Africa whose performances include tribal histories and genealogies. Janice Curtis Greene as Harriet Tubman Greene is the official Griot of Maryland

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Myth: ICE agents lack proper training. Fact: Most have been racists their whole life. --The Onion

Moonbeam: Some of the most fun people I know are scientists. --Mae Jemison

Fun Fact of the Week: Wear Something Gaudy Day is celebrated as an homage to Larry Dallas, a character in Three's Company who wore clothes with fantastic patterns and clashing colors.

Video of the Week: Irene Ryan (Grannie on the Beverly Hillbillies) in a 1937 video called the Big Courtship. https://youtu.be/Mh-_vWq0REg (16:51)

Don't walk in front of me...I may not follow. Don't walk behind me...I may not lead. Walk beside me...just be my friend. --Albert Camus

Pasta jokes will have you laughing until you're alfredo. {} My partner and I bonded over liking the same pasta shapes.

..........Chocolate flavored love.........Bea Authur …..Black Boys

3) US Black Poet Laureates: Robert Hayden (1976-78), Gwendolyn Brooks (1985-86), Rita Dove (1993-95), Natasha Trethewey (2012-14), and Tracy K Smith (2017-19).

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The Pterodactyl family named their nestlings Pthomas, Pterrence, and Ptiffany. --Submitted by ScienceHumor

Weird Word of the Week: Mellifluous: A sound that is sweet and smooth. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/mellifluous

Dragons of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Fight Fusarium blight on a lawn. To combat Fusarium blight (reddish-brown spots that turn yellow as the grass dies), mix one ounce Clorox Bleach, two ounces Jet-Dry (with citrus vinegar), and four gallons of water in a bucket. Fill a pump spray bottle or a hose-end sprayer with the liquid and – wearing goggles, a mask, rubber gloves, long pants, and a long sleeved shirt – spray the spots when the nighttime temperature remains in the mid-60 degrees Fahrenheit. Reapply once a month. Consider adding a one-half-layer of compost to the lawn (or spraying with compost tea) to increase the beneficial microorganisms in the soil. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox2.html

Life is full of pastabilitiers. {} You can't make everyone happy...but you can make everyone pasta.

...........Hair like Chinese silk.........Donna Summer …..White Boys

4) At Bill Clinton's first inauguration, Maya Angelou read her poem: On The Pulse Of Morning. She was the second poet to read a poem at an inauguration plus the first Black person and the first woman.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I just ordered a Life Alert bracelet, so if I get a life, I'll be notified immediately.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: ValleyCon 2025 (17-19, Fargo, ND) Unleash your inner beast https://valleycon.com/

FYI of the Week: Hey! Hallowe'en is right around the corner... 🚫 DON'T BUY NESTLE TREATS 🚫 Nestle steals water from First Nations. Union Made Candies: Hershey’s Nuggets & Kisses :Kit Kat : Butterfinger : Baby Ruth : Smarties : Jawbreakers : Sour Patch Kids : Tootsie Rolls : York Peppermint Patties : Jolly Ranchers : Bit-O-Honey : Mary Jane Peanut Butter Chews : Ghirardelli Chocolate Squares : Jelly Belly Candy Corn : Red Vines NOT unionized: Brach's and Mar's

Spark of Joy of the Week: Ode to the Portland Frog by Shane Ford: From the mist of the moss and the grey Oregon rain... Read it all

Ravi Ravioli went to the doctor because he always felt stuffed. {} I understand the wildlife in Antarctica prefers penguin pasta.

..........Let it fly in the breeze and get caught in the trees..........The Cowsills …..Hair

5) At Joe Biden's inauguration, Amanda Gorman read her poem: The Hill We Climb. She was 22 years old at the time.

Protest Sign of the Week: RFK JR – Industrial Strength Dumb

Better Protest Sign of the Week

DEADHEADS FOR DEMOCRACY 

 “This darkness got to give”

Quote of the Week: The most threatening thing I’ve seen yet was the naked bicyclers in Portland who were protesting ICE down there. I mean, it’s getting really ugly. --Speaker of the House Mike Johnson

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: With great power comes great electricity bills.

Today's Peace of History: October 17, every year: International Day for the Eradication of Poverty was designated by the United Nations in 1992. It began in 1987 when 100,000 people gathered in Paris and declared poverty a violation of human rights.

When lobsters cook pasta they only use a pinch of salt. {} A scientist took her dog to help with an experiment on pasta. He was a labranoodle.

..........Join the holy orgy Kama Sutra.........Original Broadway Cast …..Sodomy

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, October 17, 2025: ePistle marinara. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Anybody can jump a motorcycle. The trouble begins when you try to land it. --Evel Kneivel

Cost of War:

As of 10/16/25 State Department Costs: $277,328,789,118

As of 10/09/25 State Department Costs: $276,776,111,298

As of 10/16/25 Homeland Security: $1,212,943,378,066

As of 10/09/25 Homeland Security: $1,212,343,099,184

As of 10/16/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,333,711,645,293

As of 10/09/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,332,168,145,348

As of 10/16/25 Military Costs: $3,172,318,159,076

As of 10/09/25 Military Costs: $3,171,146,304,371

As of 10/16/25 Veterans Care: $4,535,137,266,715

As of 10/09/25 Veterans Care: $4,523,437,604,602

As of 10/16/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,531,440,993,146

As of 10/09/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,515,873,819,315

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The only way to deal with an unfree world is to become so absolutely free that your every existence is an act of rebellion. --Albert Camus

Famous Last Words: We're free! We're free! --Linda Loman Death of a Salesman by Authur Miller

..........Psychedelic urchin.........Donna Summers …..Donna

No pasta-bilities left behind. {} This too shall pasta. {} The pesto's yet to come

May Peace sooth your mind

And Joy calm your spirit

prairie mama

christine

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