Krusty ePistle

 Famous First Words: How come you're writing my name in the sand... Johnny Hart ...first ever B.C. Comic strip 2/17/58

It is the day of Championship Crab Races! I don't want to be shellfish so I'll share these crab jokes with you. / Don't worry, crabs have no claw what they're doing. / Craig Crab always orders crabracoon at the Chinese Restaurant.

..........Sparks fly from her fingertips.........The Eagles ….Witchy Woman

For small creatures such as we the vastness is bearable only through love. --Carl Sagan

It is a cold (16°F) Friday morning. The rising sun sparkles off the thin snow cover that coats rooftops and fences. A number of unseen birds are carrying on a conversation about their morning plans and Bruno sniffs about his yard looking for something. There is no breeze moving tree branches or blowing debris down the street. Puck has been out and returned to snuggle into his warm pillow. I have not been out. Instead, I have fixed myself a creamy cup of Chocolate Hazelnut Decaf. Unmoving shadows on the walls and roofs change slowly and subtly as the sun moves up in the sky; but their movements cannot be discerned. This makes the morning seem slow and deliberate and beautiful. I put my cup to my face and breathe in the steamy sweet aroma and nod to the beauty of the day before taking a gulp and enjoying the flavor of this Friday.

Hope you have awesome weekend, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: H G Wells went forward in time to make sure his team won the super bowl. But he was caught and penalized for Past Interference. --Submitted by sb of ar

The most distinguished Crab Artist is Leonardo da Pinci. / Christian Crab just opened a Prawn Shop on the east side.

..........Why don't you come to your senses.........The Eagles ….Desperado

Trivia Questions: PTA turns 147 years old today.

• ^ What do the letters p. t. a. stand for?
• ^^ What was the name of the organization before it became the PTA?
• ^^^ Today is “Founders Day” for PTA, can you name any of the founders?
• ^^^^ Where is the PTA headquarters?
• ^^^^^ How many PTA chapters are there in the US, more or less?

Big Hello: Ello - Jamaican https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I never finish anything. I have a black belt in Partial Arts. --Submitted by INRITH

Image of the Week: Chiefs' Sea of Red – Union Station, 2/15/23

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: At any given moment 13% of librarians are searching for the source of a smelly smell. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

Have you ever seen a crab walking to work? It's all a side hustle. / When crabs get drunk they walk straight.

..........It was a quiet night and I would be all right.........The Eagles ….Best Of My Love

Moonbeam: Mother considered a press conference on a par with a visit to a cage of cobras. --Margaret Truman

Meditation of the Week: Is virtue sufficient for happiness? --The Stoics

Puzzle of the Week: From Peter Collins, of Ann Arbor, Mich. You'll remember he had the challenge two weeks ago in which MEMORIAL could be rearranged to spell LIMA and ROME. This time, name a food item you might order at a fast-food restaurant. The first, second, and last letters together name another food item. Remove those. The remaining letters spelled backward name yet another food item. What foods are these? --NPR Sunday Puzzle 2/12/23

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'd like to buy a bagel with cream cheese. Sorry, we only take money. --Submitted by INRITH

A woman came into the upscale restaurant with a crab under her arm. She asked the waiter, “Do you make crab cakes?” When he said that they did, she said, “Good, it's her birthday.” / When crabs overeat they feel just clawful.

..........The full moon is calling, the fever is high.........The Eagles ….One Of These Nights

^ Parent Teacher Association

Almanac: It is Friday, February 17, 2023. The moon will be new on Monday (2/20) and is in Capricorn. It is Champion Crab Races Day, My Way Day, and World Human Spirit Day.

Among those born on this day were John Pinkerton (1758), Frederick Douglass (1817), Banjo Paterson (1864), Noah Beery (1882), Otto Stern (1888), Andrea Norton (Alice Mary, 1912), Arthur Kennedy (1914), Olive Gibbs (1918), Margaret Truman (1924), Hal Holbrook (1925), Chaim Potok (1929), Yasser Arafat (1929), Alan Bates (1924), Huey P. Newton (1942), Dodie Stevens (1947), Rene Russo (1954), Michael Jordan (1963), and Joseph Gordon-Levitt (1982).

On February seventeenth Boris Godunov was chosen tsar of Russia (1598), Miles Standish became commander of Plymouth (1621), the first ship ever passed through the Suez Canal (1867), sardines were first canned (1876), PTA was organized (1897), Oregon had the first minimum wage (1913), Blondie Boopadoop married Dagwood Bumstead (1933), color television first demonstrated (1938), the comic strip BC was first issued (1958), Macau adopted its constitution (1976), Bette Middler was named Woman of the Year by the Hasty Pudding Theatrical Society (1976), The Eagles released their Greatest Hits" (1976), the Netherlands adopted its constitution (1983), and the public Memorial for Carl Sagan was held (1997).

Night Sky, 2/17: Jupiter and Venus are closing in on each other in the western twilight. They're on their way to a head-turning conjunction on March 1st. That evening they'll be ½° apart and lined up horizontally. Mark your calendar. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Future engineers

This Week: Saturday, February 18 – Battery Day (Volta's birthday) & Pluto Day & World Whale Day

Sunday, February 19 – Best Friends Day & National Arabian Horse Day & Skate Shop Day

Night Sky, 2/29 : By 9 pm. or so, the Big Dipper stands on its handle well up in the northeast. In the northwest, Cassiopeia also stands on end (its brighter end) at about the same height. Between them is Polaris.

Monday, February 20 – Love Your Pet Day & President's Day & World Day for Social Justice

Carl Crab got a gym membership for the new year. But on this first trip he pulled a mussel. / Carson Crab gets around on land just fine. She uses the sidewalk.

..........I guess every form of refuge has its price.........The Eagles ….Lyin' Eyes

^^The first convocation of the Congress of Mothers of Washington DC was held On Feb., 17, 1897, over 2,000 people—mostly mothers, but also fathers, teachers, laborers, and legislators—attended ~~I looked into several resource for the date that NCMofWDC became PTA and I did not find the answer.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The first rule of Passive Aggressive Club is … you know what, never mind. It's fine. --Submitted by RHOZ

Moonbeam: It is impossible to fuse totally with a culture for which you feel a measure of antagonism. --Chaim Potok

Video of the Week: Opening clip from Dagwood and Blondie cartoon show (1:00)

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: Is AMC aware that nobody goes to the movies anymore...I think they were at the board meeting and said, "We've got to speed up this bankruptcy" --Alonzo Bodden Wait Wait Don't Tell Me, 2/11/23 ~~On AMC charging different prices for various theater seats

Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. --Carl Sagan

Carol Crab calls her home Michelle. / Colleen Crab opened a crab cakes and pizza restaurant that she calls A Crust Station.

..........I will sing this victory song.........The Eagles ….Already Gone

^^^ Founders’ Day (Feb. 17) is when we celebrate the legacy and work of our founders—Alice McLellan Birney, Phoebe Apperson Hearst and Selena Sloan Butler—to better the lives of every child in education, health and safety.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you've ever dated a bookworm, raise your glass! If you haven't, raise your standards.

Weird Word of the Week: Aeneous – bronze or brass colored; greenish gold https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/aeneous#:~:text=%C4%81%2D%CB%88%C4%93%2Dn%C4%93%2D%C9%99s,color%20and%20luster%20%3A%20greenish%20gold

Dragon of the Week: Well, Philadelphia has a more impressive dragon than KC. This is in Chinatown.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Dissolve soap scum from shower doors. Clean with a used sheet of Bounce. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/bounce.html

When Caleb Crab was promoted to command of the ship, he kids started calling him Crabtain. / Christopher Crab invited us to his birthday shellabration.

...........Holdin' you close in my dreams.........The Eagles ….The Best Of My Love

^^^^ National PTA offices are located at 1250 N Pitt St, Pta, Alexandria, Virginia.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Man shaves 1.7 seconds off 2-hour flight by standing up as soon as the plane lands. --Submitted by FNOG

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: ConNooga (17-19, Chattanooga, TN) Chattanooga's ultimate entertainment multi fandom, pop culture event. http://www.connooga.com/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: International Conference on Science Technology and Management (17-18. Las Vegas, NV) ...to bring together innovative academics and industrial experts in the field of Science Technology and Management to a common forum. https://10times.com/icstm-w

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Nugget → Nut, egg

Why did the crab cross the road? To get to the other tide. / A crab that throws things is called a lobster.

..........You can spend all your time making money.........The Eagles ….Take It To The Limit

^^^^^ There are over 20,000 PTA units nationwide.

My Own Writing of the Week: Off and on through my life, I have read nearly everything I could get me hands on about the worship of godness as female. Mythology...dead religions...Wicca...neo-pagan...anthropology I courted the cave experience as a spiritual milestone in addition to the mountaintop experience of which Christianity is so fond. Included were:The Hebrew Goddess ...Festivals of Ancient Athens ...Bulfinch and Hamilton on Mythology... Ginzberg's Legends of the Jews ...Helen Diner ...Erich Neumann ...Elizabeth Gould Davis ...Robert Graves ...many more. Most highly recommended is The Wise Wound by Penelope Shuttle and Peter Redgrove. (Mythology, Goddesses, and the Exorcist movie)

I also read and rejected some works. For example Sarah Pomeroy wrote Goddesses, Whores, Wives, and Slaves: Women in Classical Antiquity in which she contended that all women in the ancient world fit into one of these categories and therefore had no power or influence in the city. But other readings suggest that there was a large priestess class that had money and power and Athens had female philosophy clubs. The apostle Paul was cleverly able to find rich women who owned their own businesses and supported itinerant preachers. There was even a delightful little volume that suggests that the Odyssey was written not by Homer but by a woman. (There are now people suggesting that Homer was a woman).

Side Note: The strangest thing I found was in the middle of a list of spells that had been translated from tablets found in temples in the ancient city of Ur in Sumer (5 or 6 thousand years ago). There was a series of spells to make your man more potent – Religious or magical Viagra, of sorts. One of these spells required stationing various livestock (goats and bulls, primarily) about the bedroom and intoning "F*ck me 50 times like the Ram f*cks the ewe!! Fuck me 50 times like the Bull f*cks the cow!!" over and over. Yikes, how much pressure is that; no wonder the poor guys couldn't perform. And livestock in the bedroom, seriously? Could you use paintings or was the smell part of the magic?

I must admit I have never in a single night approached 50 times in the style of just one animistic rut, much less several species. Obviously, this relegates me to the ranks of light weights.

From: Always Surrender by Christine Smith

Quote of the Week: It was her habit to build laughter out of inadequate materials. --John Steinbeck The Grapes of Wrath

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm so old when I was a child the Dead Sea was just sick.

Today's Peace of History, February 17, 1958: The first meeting of Britain's Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament (CND) was held. CND developed the peace symbol which became its logo.

British crabs and lobsters catch their trains at King's Crustacean. / Claibel Crab moved to New York to star in Crabaret.

..........Take another shot of courage.........The Eagles ….Tequila Sunrise

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle February 17, 2022, Krusty ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith, Lawrence, KS

Moonbeam: The revolution has always been in the hands of the young. The young always inherit the revolution. --Huey Newton

Cost of War:

• As of 02/16/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $200,002,675,021.
• As of 02/09/23 State Department War Costs since 2001: $199,449,155,285.
• As of 02/16/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,117,731,898,759.
• As of 02/09/23 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,114,654,688,585.
• As of 02/16/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,128,951,425,811.
• As of 02/09/23 Homeland Security since 2001: $1,128,349,889,248.
• As of 02/16/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $2,897,958,486,988.
• As of 02/09/23 Veterans Care since 2001: $2,886,235,426,423.
• As of 02/16/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,008.333.858.
• As of 02/09/23 Military Costs since 2001: $3,007,159,676,659.
• As of 02/16/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,352,980,020,915.
• As of 02/09/23 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $8,337,382,017,671.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Our species needs, and deserves, a citizenry with minds wide awake and a basic understanding of how the world works. --Carl Sagan

Famous Last Words: The king is considering this Bill. --Constitution of The Netherlands

..........Don't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy.........The Eagles ….Take It Easy ~~Tonight's songs are from the The Eagles Greatest Hits (1976)

All entries in the Championship Crab Races must wear a head protecting shell-met. / Unfortunately no channel is broadcasting the races; too bad, it will be crabtivating.

May Peace be your shelter

And Joy be your garden

prairie mama

christine

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