eAred ePistle

 Famous First Words: Alice was beginning to get very tired... Lewis Carroll Alice's Adventures in Wonderland

It is Maize Day ! These corn puns will shuck and a-maize you. / This corn costume makes me look fat, but it's just husky.

..........Jimmy crack corn, and I don't care.........Burl Ives …..Blue Tail Fly

"When you are in doubt, be still, and wait; when doubt no longer exists for you, then go forward with courage. So long as mists envelop you, be still; be still until the sunlight pours through and dispels the mists -- as it surely will. Then act with courage." -- Chief White Eagle, Ponca

It is a cold (32°F), windy (14 mph) Friday morning. I am sitting at my computer sipping sweet, creamy decaf and listening to a bird outside my window chirp a complaint about the cold. The sky is absolutely clear without a cloud or a jet trail and the sun is blazing, but it is still cold. Squirrels nibbling at the neighbor's decorative pumpkins are shivering. A quarrel of sparrows at the bird feeder eat in silence. Willow branches are dancing wildly and even the leaves remaining on the trees and bushes are joining the festivities. The kitchen still smells of turkey and pumpkin so I help myself to a cold slice of white meat and refill my coffee cup. It was a very nice Thanksgiving and it looks like it will be a very nice day.

Hope your weekend is something to be truly thankful for, ePistilers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: A person searching for God is like fish searching for water. --Submitted by ag of ks

Carla Corn told Carl Corn he was handsome. Carl was so embarrassed all he could say was, “Aw, shucks”. / Last Halloween I walked through a corn maze. The whole time I felt like I was being stalked. It was ear-ie.

..........Praying over muffins that your grandma made.........Blake Shelton …..Corn

Trivia Questions: Happy Flossing Day

^ How long should your piece of floss be for proper cleansing?

^^ What are the top flavors in dental floss?

^^^ What are the two types of floss?

^^^^ What about flossing and orthodontic devices?

^^^^^ Why would someone use waxed floss?

Big Hello: Aloha – Hawaiian ... https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: All those people desperately shopping on Black Friday are just thankful they survived Thanksgiving dinner with the family.

Max Picture of the Week: Max casting a spell on the pumpkin

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: By 3 o'clock on Friday afternoon there's only a 29% chance that it's tea in the librarian's mug. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

Los Angeles had a police squad made up of vegetables. They rode motorcycles and patrolled fast food joints. They were called Corn CHIPs. / On Christmas Eve, Katie Corn hung corn stalkings over the fireplace.

..........Hard times are real.........Travis Tritt …..Where The Corn Don't Grow

Moonbeam: I don't think God wants to be worshiped. I think the only pure worship of God is by loving one another, and I think all other forms of worship became a substitute for the love that we should show one another. --Charles Schulz

Meditation Seed of the Week: If you could instantly become master of one skill, what skill would you pick?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Three branches of government: Oil, Banking, and Pharmaceuticals --Submitted by rhb of ks

Week of the Week: National Family Week (21-27) –Families are like fudge...mostly sweet with a few nuts. / Heredity: everyone believes in it until their kids start acting like fools.

Do zombies eat candy corn with their fingers? No, they eat their fingers separately. / Farmer Fred fed his cows maize because he really liked corned beef

..........What's that smell? Corn corn corn.........Heywood Banks …..Interstate 80 Iowa

^ To floss properly, you need to use between 18 and 20 inches of floss. This helps ensure that you have enough clean floss to use, and that it is firmly grasped while in use.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 26, 2021. The moon will be in the last quarter tomorrow and is in Virgo. It is Flossing Day, National Milk Day, Sinkie Day aka Dine Over Your Kitchen Sink Day, and World Olive Tree Day. Because it is the day after Thanksgiving it is also Black Friday, Buy Nothing Day, Maize Day, National Day of Listening, National Native American Heritage Day, Random Acts of Kindness Friday, and You're Welcomegiving Day.

Among those born on this day were John Harvard (1607), William Cowper (1731), Willis Carrier (1876), Eric Sevareid (1912), Eugene Ionesco (1912), Charles M. Schulz (1922), George Segal (1924), Robert Goulet (1933) and Tina Turner (1938).

On November twenty-sixth the first national Thanksgiving was held (1789), NYC began operating the first streetcar railway in the new world (1832), Alice in Wonderland was published (1865), Lebanon gained independence (1941), India adopted its constitution (1949) and Cream gave its final concert (1969).

Night Sky, 11/26: The last-quarter Moon rises in Leo around 11 pm tonight. By dawn on Saturday the 27th it's high in the south below Leo's belly, as shown above. The Moon is exactly last-quarter at 7:28 am Saturday morning EST. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Image of the Week: Kansas City: The Plaza Lights (nightly from now through 1/9/22)

This Week: Saturday, November 27 – Slinky Day & Small Business Saturday

Sunday, November 28 – Hanukkah begins

Night Sky 11/28 : Around 7 or 8 pm this week, the Great Square of Pegasus rests in its level position very high toward the south. (It's straight overhead if you're as far south as Miami.) Its western (right) side points very far down toward Fomalhaut. Its eastern side points down toward Beta Ceti, also known as Deneb Kaitos or Diphda, less far down and less directly.

Monday, November 29 – Cider Monday & Cyber Monday # Electronic Greetings Day

Tuesday, November 30 – Cities for Life Day & National Personal Space Day

Wednesday, December 1 – Basketball Day & Rosa Parks Day & World Aids Day

Night Sky, 12/1: If you have a very good view down to a dark south horizon — and if you're not much farther north than roughly New York, Denver, or Madrid — picture an equilateral triangle with Fomalhaut and Beta Ceti as its top two corners. Near where the third corner would be (just a bit right of that point) is Alpha Phoenicis, or Ankaa, in the constellation Phoenix. It's magnitude 2.4, not very bright but the brightest thing in its area. It has a yellow-orange tint (binoculars help check). Have you ever seen anything of the constellation Phoenix before?

Thursday, December 2 – National Mutt Day & Special Education Day

Of course corn calls its money cornbread. / If you eat candy corn with both hands you must be ambi-dextrose.

..........My daddy had a still and my momma had a gun.........Southern Culture On The Skids …..Corn Liquor

^^ Did you know that you can buy floss in just about any flavor? The most popular flavors are mint, cinnamon, and bubblegum, but you can buy more obscure flavors like wasabi or even bacon!

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When stupidity is considered patriotism, it is unsafe to be intelligent. --Isaac Asimov --Submitted by rg of kc

Moonbeam: No one would have been invited to dinner so often as Jesus was unless he were interesting and had a sense of humor. --Charles Schulz

Video of the Week: Cream performing I'm So Glad https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3GIQ86eu6c

Ollie's Very Own Picture of the Week: Ollie and his Spoon ..maybe eating corn

Rumor of the Week: It's my understanding, though I can't verify it at the moment, that Ralph Ellis of the eponymous Ralph Ellis Collection in Spencer Library, was of the same Ellis family that owned Ellis Island. --Sent by cc of ma

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: A story about what happened after Madonna left somewhere. So this is PostMadonna nor PreMadonna. --Peter Sagal Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 11/20/21

"If the white man wants to live in peace with the Indian, he can live in peace... Treat all men alike. Give them all the same law. Give them all an even chance to live and grow.All men were made by the same Great Spirit Chief.They are all brothers. The Earth is the mother of all people, and all people should have equal rights upon it..." -- White Elk

Arg! At the Renaissance Fair, roasted corn was $1 per ear. It was sold by a guy dressed like a buccaneer. / In Iowa they call the state fair a Corn-ival.

..........On the cob, creamed, steamed, low sodium..........Yes Yes Dolls …..Cornography

^^^ Unwaxed floss is thin nylon floss made of about 35 strands twisted together. Waxed floss is a standard nylon floss with a light wax coating.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: All I want for Christmas is to be off the Extended Car Warranty call list.--Submitted by cf of ks

Collective Nouns of the Week: A Plot of Playwrights and a Scoop of Journalists

Vintage Players One Liner of the Week: The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because, by then, your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Deodorize smelly feet. Dissolve two Alka-Seltzer tables in a quart of warm water and soak your feet in the solution for fifteen minutes twice a week. The baking soda in the Alka-Seltzer increases the acid level of your feet, inhibiting odor-producing bacteria. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/alkaseltzer.html

Puzzle of the Week: From Peter Collins, of Ann Arbor, MI: Name of a famous TV actress (3,6) of the past. Double her first name phonetically. You get the first name of a famous musician (2,4). If you put the last names of the musician and the actress together, in that order, you'll name a great legendary figure (4,6). Who is it? NPR Puzzle Sunday 11/21/21

The cornfield next to my house has a little corny toad living in it. / My corn had its own farm and raised Cornish game hens.

...........Each one breathes memories.........Sponge …..Candy Corn

^^^^ People with orthodontic devices like braces can floss too! Floss threaders and proxabrushes are great ways to helps people wearing braces remove food debris from between their teeth, and stuck in their brackets or orthodontic equipment.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: For anybody else that's getting coal for Christmas. Maybe we can link up and get the grill going or something. --Submitted by INRITH

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Starbase Indy 2021 (26-28, Indianapolis) –The Future STEMS from Hope https://www.starbaseindy.org/

Name That Poet of the Week: On the tree-tops near the cornfields sat the hungry crows and ravens...

Actual Science Conference of the Week: International Congress on Cell Science & Molecular Biology ((27-28) --Participants include a wide variety of stakeholder https://www.allconferencealert.com/event-detail.html?ev_id=581683&eventname=international-congress-on-cell-science-and-molecular-biology-(ic-csmb)

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Bea Arthur and BB King → King Arthur

When Candy Corn was elected to the city commission, I sent her a corn-gratulations bouquet. / I use corn oil to stop my corn from squeaking.

..........serving chicken fried steak and corn on the cob..........Reba McEntire …..The Stairs

^^^^^ Waxed floss is easier to slide between closely spaced teeth. If your teeth are very close together, we suggest flossing with thin waxed floss.

My Own Writing of the Week: I love husbands, you have a little afternoon delight and then they go home and drive someone else crazy. I really tried to avoid men with entanglements out of fairness to them and to women I may or may not have met. I have no reason to hurt any of them. Of course, in the 60s everyone was sleeping around because we were hippies. At least I think that was the excuse. (In the 20s the excuse was they were flappers and in the 40s there was war on.) We had four-people marriages, open marriages, common law marriages, and communes. Free Love was the ideal. I never cared for that scene, it seemed artificial. I found it easy to believe that somehow organically people could get together in a variety of combinations of numbers and genders; but I never experienced it. All of the ménage à trois I was involved with were well planned or a total mess. --From Husbands – mine and other people's

Poet of the Week: Henry Wadsworth Longfellow Blessing of the Cornfields

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Why is it that the people who think teenagers can be trusted with guns don't think they can be trusted with books?

Today's Peace of History, November 26, 1968: U.N. General Assembly passed a resolution against capital punishment following an official report which said, “Examination of the number of murders before and after the abolition of the death penalty does not support the theory that capital punishment has a unique deterrent effect.”

If you know any more maize jokes, I'm all ears. / If you happen to swallow a corncob, you might get corn-stipated. / A single kernel of corn is called a unicorn.

..........Nobody knows where they come from..........The Waterboys …..Corn Circles

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle November 26, 2021, Eared ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047

Moonbeam: I have a feeling that when my ship comes in I'll be at the airport. --Charles Schulz

Should Have Been in Last Week's ePistle of the Week: When he who hears does not know what he who speaks means, and when he who speaks does not know what he himself means, that is philosophy. --Voltaire

Cost of War:

As of 11/25/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,932,915,343,436.

As of 11/18/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,931,678,289,833.

As of 11/25/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,090,322,525,888.

As of 11/18/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,089,688,911,521.

As of 11/25/21 State Department War on Terror Costs since 2001: $164,439,976,700.

As of 11/18/21 State Department War on Terror Costs since 2001: $163,856,493,958.

As of 11/25/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,018,400,960,261.

As of 11/18/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,016,771,659,261.

As of 11/25/21 Veterans Care since 2001: 2,145,003,771,546 .

As of 11/18/21 Veterans Care since 2001: 2,132,652,869,886.

As of 11/25/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $7,351,086,203,505.

As of 11/18/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $7,334,650,244,204.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

"All dreams spin out from the same web." -- Hopi Tribe

Famous Last Words: I'm not capitulating ! --Berenger The Rhinoceros Eugène Ionesco

..........Treatin' the ladies to corn on the cob.........Glen Campbell …..The Straight Life

Dora the Explorer has gone on a quest to find the mythical grain, the uni corn. / So many maize jokes, I'm cornfused.

May Peace wrap your cob

And Joy pop your corn

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

The Why ePistle

 Famous First Words: Four score and seven years ago... Abraham Lincoln Gettysburg Address

Happy World Philosophy Day! You Kant beat these jokes. / When the big bad wolf began studying philosophy he became a self-awere-wolf.

..........Let us begin, what, where, why, or when.........Boogie Down …..My Philosophy

All the world is made of music. We are all strings on a lyre. We resonate. We sing together. --Joe Hill

It is a cold (29°) Friday morning. The sky is a swirl of thin white clouds hardly moving although the wind is making the willow branches dance and any leaf still clinging to its tree giggle. It sounds like giggling anyway. Near empty branches are still and calm beside the willow. Grass and some bushes are still green but leaves and trees are turning brown and yellow. They sail across the yard like out of control fairy boats. Even the catnip patch is looking cold and sad. Birds are about urging the sun to chase away the clouds, and generally gossiping about the neighborhood. Puck is cold and hurrys us back home. The wind encourages us to find shelter. The house smells of brewing coffee and I lose no time in doctoring it, ½ n ½ and sweetener. I take a long sip standing by the coffee maker. Ahh, yes, and now I am ready to write to you.

Hope your weekend is free of ambiguities and vagueness, ePistliers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My life needs editing. --Mort Sahl

Math students always carry a pencil, paper, and an eraser. A philosophy student only needs a pencil and paper. / A physics joke in a philosophy class is called blasphemy.

..........Heidegger was a boozy beggar who could think you under the table.........Monty Python …..Philosophers Song

Trivia Questions: Happy Birthday to Rocky and Bullwinkle !

^ Who created Rocky & Bullwinkle?

^^ Who were R&B's nemesis and where were they from?

^^^ Who were Gidney and Cloyd and where were they from?:

^^^^ How long did the show run?

^^^^^ What was Bullwinkle's alma mater?

Big Hello: Sannu – Hausa (Nigeria & Niger) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice. --Saul Bellow

Max Picture of the Week: Max as mom

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: A librarian's obsession with keeping the reference desk clean is inversely related to how clean they keep their own desk. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

A monk who gets a philosophy degree is called a deep friar. / The student dropped out of 19^th Century Socialist Thought 101 because of poor Marx.

..........Philosophy is the talk on a cereal box.........Edie Brickell & The New Bohemians …..What I Am

Moonbeam: In the Far East, compulsory labor can work wonders, just like here... If only Belgium wanted to see that. --Ferdinand De Lesseps

Meditation Seed of the Week: If you were going to a famous historical figure dress-up party, who would you go as?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I wonder if Trump tried to grab Mike Pence by the patriot. Mike Pence now claims he has no problems at all with his former boss, so I guess Trump was right. --Jimmy Kimmel

Week of the Week: Medical Cannabis Week (16-20) –Doctor, what can you prescribe for the pain, nausea, and lack of appetite of my side effects? Round trip airline tickets to Colorado as needed. / You can't spell healthcare without THC.

Nihilists, nihilists, if not for Nihilism you'd have nothing to believe in. / My local philosophy club offers free why-fi.

..........Man does not eat by bread alone.........Chenoweth & Levine …..My New Philosophy

^ The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show was created by producer Jay Ward and cartoonist Alex Anderson, who had worked together on the Crusader Rabbit series. Their initial vision was a show called The Frostbite Falls Revue about a group of animals running a TV station, but the project never got beyond the proposal stage. The next attempt at a new series began with the pilot Rocky the Flying Squirrel. General Mills came on as a sponsor and Rocky and His Friends was born.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 19, 2021. The moon was full (Cold) this morning around 3:30 am and is in Gemini. It is American Made Matters Day, Equal Opportunity Day (aka Gettysburg Address Day), Have A Bad Day Day, International Men's Day, Rocky and Bullwinkle Day, Women's Entrepreneurship Day, World Philosophy Day, and World Toilet Day. In Mali it is Liberation Day and in Monaco it is Monegasque National Day.

Among those born on this day were Charles I of England (1600), Albert Bertel Thorvaldsen (1770), Ferdinand de Lesseps (1805), Jose Raul Capablanca (1888), Allen Tate (1899), Tommy Dorsey (1905), Indira Gandhi (1917), Roy Campanella (1921), Larry King (1933), Dick Cavett (1936), Ted Turner (1938), Calvin Klein (1942), Lovely Elizabeth (1960), Meg Ryan (1961), and Jodie Foster (1962).

On November nineteenth Lincoln delivered the Gettysburg Address (1863), Boss Tweed was sentenced to 12 years for fraud (1874), Carrie Nation attempted to address the US Senate (1903), Joe Hill was murdered by the authorities of the state of Utah (1915), US Senate rejected the Treaty of Versailles & the League of Nations (1919), Ford cancelled the Edsel (1959), Apollo 12 crew walk on the moon (1969), and Reagan and Gorbachev met for the first time (1985).

Night Sky, 11/19: For us in North America, the partial lunar eclipse will take place late at night on November 18, or in the early morning on November 19, 2021. The moon will be high in North American skies, to the west. In this illustration, the white disks represent partially eclipsed moons. Watch for the dipper-shaped Pleiades star cluster near the eclipsed moon. https://earthsky.org/astronomy-essentials/partial-lunar-eclipse-november-19-2021/

Image of the Week: Have the best turkey day...

This Week: Saturday, November 20- Name Your PC Day & Universal Children's Day

Sunday, November 21- Mother Goose Day & World Hello Day & Stir Up Sunday

Night Sky, 11/21: Venus and Jupiter, the two brightest celestial objects after the Sun and the Moon, blaze during and after twilight a little less far apart every week. Venus is low in the southwest; Jupiter is high in the south. Saturn glows less than halfway from Jupiter to Venus. Watch this line of three shorten for the next month. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Monday, November 22 – Do Dah Day & Humane Society Day

Tuesday, November 23 – Doctor Who Day & Fibonacci Day & National Espresso Day

Wednesday, November 24 – Celebrate Your Unique Talent Day & National Jukebox Day

Night Sky, 11/24: Neptune (magnitude 7.9, at the Aquarius-Pisces border) is already high in the southeast at nightfall.

Thursday, November 25 – Thanksgiving Day & International Hat Day & National Play With Dad Day

Failing a course in Empiricism is Hume-iliating. / A skunk's philosophy is I stink, therefore I am.

..........Everything they'll ever know.........The Crabs …..Jean Paul Sartre

^^ Boris Badenov and Natasha Fatale were from Pottsylvania.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Smoking pot doesn't make me a bad person just like going to church doesn't make you a good one.

Moonbeam: There are two kinds of people, those who do the work and those who take the credit. Try to be in the first group; there is less competition there. --Indira Gandhi

Video of the Week: Paul Robeson singing Joe Hill. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8Kxq9uFDes

Ollie's Very Own Picture of the Week: Ollie and the submarine of a different color

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: It's very funny what presses their buttons; but the Republicans are really against imaginary creatures. They were upset about Mr Potato Head and now we've got Big Bird. I Don't know who's next to set them off. --Alanxo Bodden Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 11/16/21

If the workers took a notion they could stop all speeding trains; every ship upon the ocean they can tie with mighty chains. --Joe Hill

I was dating a solipsist but he ended it. He said, “It's not you; it's only me. / How many surrealists would it require to screw in a light bulb? Fish

..........No one ever wrote a tune for godless existentialism.........Steve Martin & The Steep Canyon Rangers …..Atheists Don't Have No Songs

^^^ Gidney and Cloyd were aliens from the Moon.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's not my fault you thought I was normal. That's on you. --Submitted by mja of ks

Collective Nouns of the Week: a Pretension of Intellects and a Confusion of Philosophers

Vintage Players One Liner of the Week: Old age is when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Get short-term relief from nicotine withdrawal symptoms. As long as you're not on a low-sodium diet or have peptic ulcers, drink two Alka-Seltzer tablets dissolved in a glass of water at every meal. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/alkaseltzer.html

Puzzle of the Week: Name a variety of songs and a genre of music (6,4). Switch the initial consonant sounds of these two words, and, phonetically, you'll name an object found in the kitchen (6,4). What is it?

I took my Marxist friend to a Japanese restaurant for the tea ceremony. But she got up a left before it even started. She said proper tea is theft. / You know, Nietzsche complained that Egypt was way to Nile-istic.

...........I don't think humans are made for this world.........Ingrid Yeung …..Aristotle

^^^^ The current Rocky title was imposed for home video releases more than 40 years after the series originally aired and was never used when the show was televised; television airings of the show were broadcast under the titles of Rocky and His Friends from 1959 to 1961 (and again in Canada in 1963), The Bullwinkle Show from 1961 to 1964, and The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show (or The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle) in syndication. So, 5 years

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Every time you smoke a cigarette God takes away one day of your life and gives it to Keith Richards. ~~FYI: Keith Richards is four months older than I am and Willie Nelson is ten years older than Keith.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Fantastika 2021 (19-21, Stockholm) There are many descriptions of what is fantastic, but a simple one is that there is something in the story that is not realistic today. https://fantastika2020.com/om-sf-kongresser/

Name That Poet of the Week: If I should labor through daylight and dark, Consecrate, valorous, serious, true, Then on the world I may blazon my mark; And what if I don't, and what if I do?

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 1173^rd International Conference on Chemical and Biochemical Engineering (ICCBE) (11/19, Cambridge ...find international linkage for future collaborations... https://conferencealert.com/conf-detail.php?ev_id=496650

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Ballad Soul --> Salad Bowl

Voltaire liked his apples candied. / Barb ran a pub with absolutely no class. It was named Marxist Utopia.

..........It's a sign of the time that we're in.........Emperor X …..Schopenhauer in Berlin

^^^^^ Bullwinkle attended college at "Wossamotta U" on a football scholarship. He is a long-time supporter of the Bull Moose Party, and at one time was the part-owner, part-governor of the island of Moosylvania.

My Own Writing of the Week: Stringman and I played games...board games, card games, and pen and pencil games. Once a friend gave him two decks of cards that were stamped onto tiles - like dominoes. We made up games to play with them. He was also a master of string figures and taught adults and children alike to make them too. He read anthropology journals to find descriptions of string figures displayed by tribes and peoples in obscure places and times. He and a friend did a stand up 'comedy' routine...with string. Every couple of years, I get out my string - it hangs near my computer - to remember a few of the old tricks, 2 diamonds, 3 diamonds, 4 diamonds aka Jacob's Ladder. 1,000 diamonds was the standard trick still to be learned. --from The Philosopher

Poet of the Week: Dorothy Parker Philosophy

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Happy International Men's Day.-- When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping; men invade another country. --Elayne Boosier / Is it a coincidence that International Men's Day and World Toilet Day fall are celebrated simultaneously

Today's Peace of History, November 19, 1977: In an unprecedented move, Egyptian President Anwar el-Sadat traveled to Israel to seek a permanent peace settlement with Egypt's neighbor after decades of conflict.

I bought a reflective jacket. Now it sits in the corner and reads Descartes. / If you cross a philosopher with the godfather you get an offer you can't understand.

..........I want a god who stays dead, not plays dead.........The Dandy Warhols …..Nietzsche

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle November 19, 2021, Why ePistle? Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047

Moonbeam: Those who have succeeded at anything and don't mention luck are kidding themselves. --Larry King

Cost of War:

As of 11/18/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,931,678,289,833.

As of 11/11/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,930,789,012,529.

As of 11/18/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,089,688,911,521.

As of 11/11/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,089,079,669,501.

As of 11/18/21 State Department War on Terror Costs since 2001: $163,856,493,958.

As of 11/11/21 State Department War on Terror Costs since 2001: $163,295,696,794.

As of 11/18/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,016,771,659,261.

As of 11/11/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,015,204,951,627.

As of 11/18/21 Veterans Care since 2001: 2,132,652,869,886.

As of 11/11/21 Veterans Care since 2001: 2,120,774,450,647.

As of 11/18/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $7,334,650,244,204.

As of 11/11/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $7,318,848,455,713.

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

I will die like a true-blue rebel. Don't waste any time in mourning – organize. --Joe Hill

Famous Last Words: But, Bullwinkle, there aren't any more woods. --Rocket J Squirrel

..........What's the sound of one hand clapping.........Van Morrison …..Enlightenment

Does it feel solipsistic here or is it just me? / I attended a philosophy convention and there was a convention of comedians there at the same time. I laughed more than I thought.

May Peace surround you

And Joy center you

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

unbearable ePistle

 Famous First Words: Help me off the pedestal. Grace Kelly as Tracy Lord in High Society

It's Polar Bear Week! Paul Polar meant to write jokes for you; but he's still waiting for the seal of approval. / Polars catch fish with their bear hands.

..........But there's a warnin' sign on the road ahead........Neil Young …..Rockin' In The Free World

The thing that lies at the foundation of positive change, the way I see it, is service to a fellow human being. --Lech Walesa

It is a chilly (39°F) Friday morning. The sky is a very pale blue with the sun rising below a flock of fluffy clouds slowly working their way south. A fierce north wind drives the cold between the buttons and up the sleeves of my coat. It strips leaves from branches and sends them flying around the neighborhood. The little maple tree that was the first to change it's dress to red and brighten the block, has only a dozen or so leaves left, small yellow, unhealthy looking leaves. What a change. Puck barks at the blowing leaves and at the world in general. He doesn't seem to mind the wind as he sniffs his way down the block. There are no birds singing the praises of the morning. There is only the sound of machinery tearing up the street to replace the scarred pavement, grinding and drilling that sets my teeth on edge. So we return home to the smell of freshly brewed coffee and freshly harvested catnip drying on the counter. I ignore the catnip but fix a cup of decaf, creamed and sweetened, dark and rich. I sit down and take a long, hot gulp. Ahh, and now I get to write to you. What a great morning.

Hope your weekend is warm and cozy, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The Devil whispered in my ear: “You're not strong enough to withstand the storm.” I whispered back: “At least I didn't lose my golden fiddle to some hillbilly from Georgia.”

Polar bears keep their money in snowbanks. / Paula Polar was very sad; she felt ice-olated.

..........I've been to Hollywood, I've been to Redwood........Neil Young ….Heart Of Gold

Trivia Questions: Ellis Island – what do we know about it?

^ Where did Ellis Island get its name?

^^ Where did immigrants actually land before going to Ellis Island?

^^^ What exams were given to incoming immigrants?

^^^^ How busy was Ellis Island, anyway?

^^^^^ To what purpose was Ellis Island put during WWI & II?

Big Hello: Bonjou – Haitian Creole https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When I was young I was scared of the dark. Now when I see my electricity bill I am scared of the light.

Max Picture of the Week: Max and Mom making cautionary art

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: Instead of a flask at their desk 34% of librarians hide a box of wine in an unused magazine box. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

When Peter Polar got caught in a rainstorm, his mates called him drizzly bear. / Petunia Polar loved 10 pins. Her nickname was Bowler Polar.

..........We took our souls and we flew away.........Neil Young …..Comes A Time

Moonbeam: "To live for a principle, for the triumph of some reform by which all mankind is to be lifted up—to be wedded to an idea—may be, after all, the holiest and happiest of marriages." --Elizabeth Cady Stanton on her friend Susan B Anthony

Meditation Seed of the Week: What would you do with the ability to become invisible for a day?

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I wonder how bored people have to be to play a game of Type This and Let the Computer Finish

Week of the Week: Children's Book Week (8-14) --What's the Cat in the Hat's favorite Red Lobster order? One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish / Dr Seuss once treated a fellow doctor, Dr George Forten, who was afraid of the number 3. Forten fears a few... ~~Sigh

Perry Polar claimed he wore his thick, white coat fur protection. / Pearl Polar is a gossip columnist. She specializes in compromising polar-oids.

..........I've been first and last.........Neil Young …..Old Man

^ Ellis Island was named for its last private owner, Samuel Ellis. Long before it became a way station for people looking for a new beginning it was used for pirate hangings in the early 1800s.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 12, 2021. The moon was in the first quarter yesterday and is in Pisces. It is Chicken Soup For The Soul Day, Fancy Rat & Mouse Day, National French Dip Day, Sigma Gamma Rho Day, and World Pneumonia Day. Because it is the second Friday, it is Domino Day. In Austria it is Republic Day (1918) and in Saudi Arabia it is Coronation Day. Finally women's organizations everywhere celebrate Elizabeth Cady Stanton Day. She was born on this date in 1815.

Among those born on this day were Juana Inés de La Cruz (1651), Elizabeth Cady Stanton (1815), Bahá'u'lláh (1817), Auguste Rodin (1840), Lord Rayleigh (1841), Sun Yat-sen (1866), Jack Oakie (1903), Kim Hunter (1922), Grace Kelly (1929), Charles Manson (1934), Neil Young (1945), and Nadia Comaneci (1961).

On November twelfth the Origin of the Era of Alexander began (324 BCE), the Origin of the Era of Ascension began (295), George Washington forbade recruiting blackmen (1775), Britain annexed Gilbert & Ellice Islands (1915), Notre Dame's Fighting Irish changed their color from blue to green (1927), Trotsky was expelled (1927), the Oakland Bay Bridge opened (1936), the first drive-up bank window opened (Chicago, 1946), Song of the South was released (1946), Ellis Island closed (1954), date returned to in Back to the Future (I & II, 1955), Paula Murphy set the female land speed record (225.37/mph, 1964), Justice William O Douglas retired after 36 years (1975), the Polish government freed labor activist Lech Walesa (1982), and Yuri Andropov succeeded Leonid Brezhnev as leader of the Soviet Union (1982).

Night Sky, 1/12: At nightfall Jupiter, Saturn, the Moon, and Venus form a long, ragged diagonal line in the south to southwest, in that order from upper left to lower right. The largest asteroid, 1 Ceres, is currently passing through the Hyades near Aldebaran this week http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Image of the Week: The new fridge

This Week: Saturday, November 13 – World Kindness Day & Sandwich Day

Sunday, November 14 – International Girls Day & Operating Room Nurse Day & National American Teddy Bear Day

Night Sky, 11/14: Vega is the brightest star high in the west on November evenings. Its little constellation Lyra extends to its left, pointing as always to Altair, the brightest star in the southwest. Three of Lyra's stars near Vega are interesting doubles. Barely above Vega is 4th-magnitude Epsilon Lyrae, the Double-Double. Epsilon forms one corner of a roughly equilateral triangle with Vega and Zeta Lyrae. The triangle is less than 2° on a side, hardly the width of your thumb at arm's length.

Monday, November 15 – America Recycles Day & I Love To Write Day & National Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day

Tuesday, November 16 – International Day for Tolerance & National Button Day & Family Day

Wednesday, November 17 – Take A Hike Day & Homemade Bread Day

Night Sky, 11/17: Uranus (magnitude 5.7, in southern Aries) is well up in the east by 7 pm standard time. Neptune (magnitude 7.9, at the Aquarius-Pisces border) is already high in the southeast at nightfall.

Thursday, November 18 – World Philosophy Day & Use Less Stuff Day & Mickey Mouse Day

Patrick Polar was getting very old, his coat was yellow and he was afraid of losing his teeth and becoming a gummy bear. / Patricia Polar was a scientist studying bear-ium. She was known for never taking a vacation; she preferred hi-bear-nation.

..........A dreamer of pictures.........Neil Young …..Cinnamon Girl

^^ The waters surrounding Ellis Island were too shallow for transatlantic ships to navigate, so most docked and unloaded their passengers in Manhattan. During the detour, American citizens and first and second-class passengers were allowed to enter the country after only a brief inspection, but steerage passengers were herded onto ferries and shuttled to Ellis Island for further processing.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Bumper Sticker on Grandma's Car: I'm speeding because I have to get there before I forget where I'm going. --Submitted by cf of ks

Moonbeam: “I would have girls regard themselves not as adjectives, but as nouns.” --Elizabeth Cady Stanton

Video of the Week: What if the Beatles were Irish with Roy Zimmerman https://www.facebook.com/100045196264954/videos/10156256246798762/

Ollie's Very Own Picture of the Week: Ollie has had enough

Not So Late Night Snacks of the Week: A dad on Tik Tok realized that Disney+ had edited the popular Australian kids cartoon Bluey for sensitive American audiences For example, they removed just a moment of a scene that showed what? ... What is perfectly fine in Australia but they decided American audiences simply could not handle this/ --Peter Sagal Oh, a character getting the vaccine. --Negin Farsad ~~The answer was a unicorn pooping. Wait Wait Don't Tell Me 11/6/21

It is hardly possible to build anything if frustration, bitterness. and a mood of helplessness prevails. --Lech Walesa

I have a recurring dream about being attacked by polar bears. The doctor says it's just a bite-mare. / Pamela Polar invented the polar roller coaster. They call her the Roller Bear.

..........There's calm in your eyes and I'm getting' blown away.........Neil Young …..Like A Hurricane

^^^ Upon arrival at Ellis Island, immigrants were ushered into a room called the Great Hall and paraded before a series of medical officers for physical inspection. Most were allowed to pass by in a matter of seconds, but those whom the doctors deemed physically or mentally deficient were marked with chalk and taken away for additional screening. Questionable candidates were forced to submit to more detailed questioning and medical exams, and any signs of contagious disease, poor physique, feeblemindedness or insanity could see an immigrant denied admittance on the grounds that they were likely to become a ward of the state. In later years, doctors at Ellis Island even devised puzzles and memory tests to ensure that certain immigrants were intelligent enough to find work. New arrivals could also face rejection if they were anarchists, had a criminal record, or showed signs of low moral character. Despite the litany of guidelines for new immigrants, the number of people denied entry at Ellis Island was quite low. Of the 12 million people who passed through its doors between 1892 and 1954, only around 2 percent were deemed unfit to become citizens of the United States.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Things I trust more than Ted Cruz: Flint, MI tap water, Bill Cosby's drinks, anything from Chipotle.

Distant Cousin of Video of the Month: Domino Day – video of 32,000 dominoes falling into beautiful patterns https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_I7doqtpDq8

Extra Peace Quote of the Week: Two armies that fight each other is like one large army that commits suicide. --Henri Barbusse

Vintage Players One Liner of the Week: Cats are in charge, accept it.

Collective Nouns of the Week: An obscurity of Poets and a Pomposity of Professors

Puzzle of the Week: This challenge came from Michael Shteyman, of Freeland, Md. Think of a popular tourist attraction in two words (5,6). The second, fourth and sixth letters of the second word, in order, spell the first name of a famous author. The last four letters of the first word spell the author's last name. Who is the author, and what is the tourist attraction? NPR Puzzle Sunday 11/7/21

When Pierce Polar learned that the Antarctic was not the same as the Arctic, he was stunned. He'd never heard of polar opposites. / Whenever her friends asked what she wanted to do, Priscilla Polar would say, “North Pole and Chill”.

...........Just like children sleepin' we could dream this night away.........Neil Young …..Harvest Moon

^^^^ From 1900 to 1914—the peak years of Ellis Island’s operation—an average of 1,900 people passed through the immigration station every day. Most successfully passed through in a matter of hours, but others could be detained for days or weeks.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: OmegaCon 2021 (12-14, The Lodge at Crooked Lake, WI) Now calm down and bear with us... https://www.facebook.com/OmegaCon/

Name That Poet of the Week: In Honor of Fancy Rat and Mouse Day Thou saw the fields laid bare an' waste, An' weary Winter comin fast...

Actual Science Conference of the Week: International Online Symposium on Environmental Microplastics (10-12, Chicago) MOS aims to ...discuss the gaps... https://10times.com/e1zp-31zh-10gp

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: : Grand Canyon --> Ayn Rand

Percy Polar worked very hard all week, but he only did the bear minimum on weekends. / Polar bears tend to find snow jokes unbearable.

..........Now your crosses are burning fast.........Neil Young …..Southern Man

^^^^^ Shortly after the United States declared war on Germany in 1917, the government turned a suspicious eye toward all German-born, non-naturalized citizens residing within its borders. Potential “alien enemies” were placed under harsh restrictions, and those suspected of harboring pro-German sentiment were rounded up and detained. Since immigration had tapered off World War I, officials designated Ellis Island as one of the main holding centers for would-be enemies of the state, and some 1,500 people were eventually detained there.

My Own Writing of the Week: Stringman became a mushroom hunter and joined with other fungus-heads and finally, wrote a book on identifying mushrooms in the area. I went on forays from time to time but lacked the essential drive to find the next wonder smut. I do have a much clearer picture of the diversity of the species and appreciate the beauty and flavor that is out there. However, I did not find an answer to the question: why do we have no problem going to a grocery store and buying mushrooms grown and harvested by total strangers but we are suspicious of any mushroom given to us by a dear friend?

Poet of the Week: Robert Burns To A Mouse https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/43816/to-a-mouse-56d222ab36e33

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Farmer Joan asked her partner what he did with the chicken she brought him. “I made the chicken soup”, he said. “What did you make for me”, Joan asked.

Today's Peace of History, November 12, 1989: Tens of thousands of Americans joined “Mobilize for Women’s Lives” in more than 150 cities and towns nationwide. They sought protection of women’s rights to reproductive choice, including abortion. ~~31 years ago...it is estimated that 2.6 millon women marched in August 2021. When will we be free?

Parsley Polar missed the school bus and rode there by icicle instead. / The polar bears are very worried about global warming; however, the views are thaw dropping.

..........This summer I hear the drumming.........Neil Young …..Ohio

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, November 12, 2021, Unbearable ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. 2511 Morningside Dr. Lawrence, KS 66047

Moonbeam: “Come, come, my conservative friend, wipe the dew off your spectacles, and see that the world is moving.” --Elizabeth Cady Stanton

Cost of War:

As of 11/11/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,930,789,012,529.

As of 11/04/21 Military Costs of War since 2001: $2,929,364,113,594.

As of 11/11/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,089,079,669,501.

As of 11/04/21 Homeland Security Costs since 2001: $1,088,503,551,196.

As of 11/11/21 State Department War on Terror Costs since 2001: $163,295,696,794.

As of 11/04/21 State Department War on Terror Costs since 2001: $162,765,230,181.

As of 11/11/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,015,204,951,627.

As of 11/04/21 Interest on War Debt since 2001: $1,013,723,337,709.

As of 11/11/21 Veterans Care since 2001: 2,120,774,450,647.

As of 11/04/21 Veterans Care since 2001: 2,109,544,306,428.

As of 11/11/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $7,318,848,455,713.

As of 11/04/21 Total Cost of Wars since 2001: $7,303,903

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

He who puts out his hand to stop the wheel of history will have his fingers crushed. --Lech Walesa

Famous Last Words: There ain't nobody looking back again Song of the South

..........In the mornin' when your rise.........Neil Young …..You Don't Have To Cry

Patches the Polar Bear liked cold butts and hot jazz. / What did Penny Polar eat right after the dentist straightened her teeth? The dentist.

May Peace warm your cockles

And Joy cool your jets

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh: