dOmestic ePistle

Famous First Words: Good evening. Seven weeks ago... JFK radio address on the Berlin Crisis (7/25/1961)

Funny thing about housework... What do you do to someone who is doing the dishes? Let them! ϔ I can't stand doing dishes; that why I have this stool.

Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people. A nation does not have to be cruel to be tough. --Franklin D Roosevelt

Happy Wine And Cheese Day! I'd suggest a bottle of dry white to pair with these cheesy jokes.

..........Some folks say that I ain't free.........Barbara Harris …..It Don't Worry Me (Nashville, the movie)

Propaganda does not deceive people; it merely helps them to deceive themselves. --Eric Hoffer

It is rainy Friday morning. The temperature is 71°F which is several degrees cooler than we've seen lately. The rain has stopped for the moment but the splat splat of drops diving from the roof eaves and the patio furniture creates a slow, wet rhythm section. A squirrel silently inches herself face first down the edge of the storage shed; like an inchworm, she moves her front paws then brings her back paws up behind them and moves her front ones again. She snatches a peanut and returns to the roof. In the mean time blue jays and crows make lost of noise and stomp around on the patio. Wildlife doesn't seem to do any housework at all. Good for them, I guess. My enjoyment of their antics is worth the sweeping of nut shells and grass clippings. A joyous morning all around.

Hope your weekend is mess free, clean freaks.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: How can I make jokes at a time like this? My dark sense of humor is a load-bearing structure. --Submitted by MMS

Did you hear that Indivisible introduced a new broom; it's sweeping the nation. ϔ Death's daughter, Morta, used to walk around in a hoodie carrying a witch's broom; she was known as the Grim Sweeper.

Retirement: A time to Wine down and take it Cheesy.

..........Ah, but, two hours of pushin' broom...........Roger Miller …..King of the Road

Trivia Questions: It's National Carousel Day! Carousels have been around, basically, since there were children. But we are capitalists and are celebrating the first patented steam driven merry-go-round. ~~This was real steampunk.

1. When was the first steam driven Carousel patented?

2. Where is the world's largest indoor Carousel?

3. Where is the world's largest Carousel?

4. Are there still any steam driven Carousels operating in the US?

5. What is your favorite song from the musical Carousel?

Big Hello: Dobrý deň - Slovak https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Thing I Read of the Week: Being popular on Facebook is like sitting at the cool table in the cafeteria at the mental hospital.

Image of the Week: Squirrels eating peanuts in the penthouse because those other 3 squirrels on the patio are obviously riff raff. ~~And all 5 are identical, I swear. What have I done?

Insult of the Week: You speak an infinite deal of nothing. --William Shakespeare

Carl was attacked by a broom; he describes it as a brush with death. ϔ That damned broom is always late and it always claims it “over-swept”.

Do not be content with showing friendship in words alone, let your heart burn with loving kindness for all who may cross your path. --Bahá'u'lláh

The other day someone told me that I could make ice cubes with leftover wine. I was confused...what is leftover wine?

..........I got old floors to wax and scrub.........Jody Miller …..Queen of the House

Moonbeam: Smoking is hateful to the nose, harmful to the brain, and dangerous to the lungs. --King James I ~~Yes, the King James who had the bible translated into English.

Blasphemy of the Week: God is not someone special; God is not a person but existence itself. The quality of being alive, that's God. --Submitted by MMS

Coffee Joke of the Week: Reality is frequently inaccurate especially before caffeine. --Submitted by 42 Collective

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you're feeling lost, just remember: the entire galaxy is also spinning aimlessly through chaos, and it seems fine. --Submitted by 42 Collective

Please, no vacuum cleaner jokes; they always suck. ϔ When you clean out all that hair from the roller on the vacuum, do you yourself become a vacuum cleaner? ϔ The Dyson Ball Cleaner name is very misleading.

Just as compassion is the wish that all sentient beings be free of suffering, loving-kindness is the wish that all may enjoy happiness. --Dakai Lama

Remember, this is a Wine and Cheese reception not Whine and Jeez.

..........You're beatin' clothes on a washtub.........Dr John …..Wash, Mama, Wash

1) July 25, 1871 William Schneider patented the first modern carousel. He lived in Davenport, IA.

Almanac: It is Friday, July 25, 2025. The moon was new yesterday (7/24) and is in Cancer. Today is Carousel aka Merry-Go-Round Day, Hire A Veteran Day, Thread the Needle Day, Lumberjack Day, National Talk in An Elevator Day, Red Shoe Day Against Lyme Disease, System Administrator Appreciation Day, Wine And Cheese Day, and World Drowning Prevention Day. Because it is the last Friday in July it is also Get Gnarly Day.

Among those born on this day were James I (1394), Christoph Scheiner (1575), Henry Knox (1750), Flora Adams Darling (1840), Walter Brennan (1894), Eric Hoffer (1902), Jack Gilford (1907), Estelle Getty (1924), Barbara Harris (1935), Emmett Till (1941), Walter Payton (1954), and Iman (1955).

On July twenty-fifth North Carolina became a royal colony (1729), the first US intercollegiate billard match was held (Harvard v. Yale. 1860), the carousel was patented (Davenport, IA, 1871), Annette Adams became the first female D.A. in the US (CA, 1918), the US Department of Defense was formed (1947), A Chorus Line premiered (1975), Svetlana Savitskaya became the first female to walk in space (1984), George Brett hit for the cycle (1990), and the Olympics opened in Barcelona, Spain (1992).

Night Sky, 7/25: Arcturus moves down the west evening sky. It forms the bottom point of the Kite of Boötes. The Kite extends upper right from Arcturus about 2 fists at arm's length. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Ollie and Max … sporting stylish walking sticks … ready for a woodsy adventure

This Week: Saturday, July 26 – Aunts and Uncles Day & Bagelfest & National Day of the Cowboy

Sunday, July 27 – Love Is Kind Day & National Body Painting Day & National Korean Veterans Armistice Day & Walk On Stilts Day

Night Sky, 7/27: Jupiter, magnitude -1.9, rises around the beginning of dawn. Find it one or two fists lower left of Venus. Venus and Jupiter are closing in toward a pre-dawn conjunction just 0.9 apart on August 12^th.

Monday, July 28 – Buffalo Soldiers Day & National Waterpark Day & World Hepatitis Day

Tuesday, July 29 – Global Tiger Day & Lasagna Day & Rain Day

Night Sky, 7/29: Alpha Capricornids Meteor Shower: Originating in comet 169P/NEAT. Known for producing rare, bright fireball meteors – slow moving streaks of light that can appear to glide across the sky. Alpha Capricornid

Wednesday, July 30 – Cheesecake Day & Friendship Day & Medicare's Birthday & National Share A Hug Day

Thursday, July 31 – National Avocado Day & National Mutt Day & National Orgasm Day

Vacuum Cleaners: Sucking all the fun out of messes. ϔ My vacuum cleaner went on strike...claimed everybody pushed her around.

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. --Mark Twain

Wine hangover – the grape depression.

..........Cause the new one just goes Mmmm.........John Hartford …..Good Old Electric Washing Machine

2) The world's largest indoor carousel is located near Spring Green, in Iowa County, WI. It has 269 carousel animals, 182 chandeliers, and over 20,000 lights.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: There should be confetti in tires so when they blow out it's still kind of an okay day. --Submitted by INRITH

Moonbeam: Having proceeded to this length, for which they are now ripe, we shall have a formidable rebellion against reason, the principle of all government, and against the very name of liberty. --Henry Knox

Fun Fact of the Week: Annette Abbott Adams was the first woman to serve as an assistant US attorney in Woodrow Wilson's administration. She was also the first female US attorney, the first woman to sit on the California appellate court and the first woman to sit on the state Supreme Court. https://thehill.com/100-women-who-have-helped-shape-america/517912-annette-adams/

The Other Quote of the Week: This history we were taught could not have produced the present we were living in. --Eric Foner

It is futile to judge a kind deed by its motives. Kindness can become its own motive. We are made kind by being kind. --Eric Hoffer

I am not drinking alone – I have CHEESE.

How do we change the world? One random act of kindness at a time. --Morgan Freeman

I believe in the Sock Fairy. I'm always losing socks in the laundry and finding change. What else could cause that? ϔ Behind every successful woman is a basket of dirty laundry.

..........Get out in that kitchen and rattle those pots and pans.........Bill Haley & His Comets …..Shake Rattle & Roll

3) The world's largest merry-go-round is in East Rutherford, NJ. It's called the Dream Wheel and has over 30,000 LED lights. And, It looks exactly like a Ferris Wheel. https://www.americandream.com/venue/dreamwheel I didn't find any “second largest” but found lots of lists – most popular, most unique, etc.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I like my country like I like my whiskey – without ice. --Submitted by gr of oh

Weird Word of the Week: Smicker – to look amorously at someone https://parade.com/1195613/marynliles/funny-words/

Dragon of the Week: I named this file KS Dragon – but I can find no reference actually linking it to any place in particular.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Deodorize coolers and thermos bottles. Wash with diluted Clorox bleach, then rinse. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox.html

The difference between The Grandmaster Grifter and a wine lover; the wine lover likes it when it's older.

A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve. --Joseph Joubert

From the amount of laundry I do each week I'm assuming there are people who live here that I've never met. ϔ I must admit that I get a small rush of joy when I open the dryer to find the clothes still damp. It's like the dryer is procrastinating for me.

...........D is for dishes and dusting and dirt.........Peggy Seeger …..Housewife's Alphabet

4) Western Minnesota Steam Threshers Reunion in Rollag, MN, is the only steam-powered carousel left in the US. It runs every Labor Day weekend.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Menopause has become Perimenopause but I just heard a prefered term – Cougar Puberty

Penultimate Jeffrey's Apartment Update: First – Of course the date of death was on the death certificate – it's the VERY FIRST entry. I may have missed it because it's wrong. It says he died on June 24. This is kind of creepy because I spoke to him on the 27^th. Next - most of the furniture is gone. Friends of the Library are looking for someone who can haul away the plethora of books and dvds and cds. So it is moving right along. A week from today I am turning in the keys whatever the state of the apartment.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Time Traveler's Weekend 2025 (25-27, Rockville, IN) Steampunk Event https://steampunkcons.com/event/24638/time-travelers-weekend-2025

Warning of the Week: Scientists warn that Earth could run out of conspiracy theories by 2026 if they keep coming true at the current rate.

Spark of Joy of the Week: Monty Python singing the Lumberjack Song for Lumberjack Day https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FshU58nI0Ts (2:03)

I cut myself on a piece of cheese – that was some sharp cheddar.

When we feel love and kindness towards others, it not only makes others feel loved and cared for, but it helps us also develop inner happiness and peace. --Dalai Lama

With a few more decorative pillows I won't ever have to actually make my bed. ϔ Every morning after I wake up, the first thing I do is make my bed. Tomorrow I'm returning this piece of junk to Ikea.

..........Throw out the trash.........Marcia Ball …..Clean My House

5) You'll Never Walk Alone (Mr Snow (You're a Queer One, Julie Jordan (What's the Use of Wond'rin' (If I Loved You (There's Nothin' So Bad (Blow High, Blow Low (A Real Nice Clambake (June Is Bustin' Out All Over (When the Children Are Asleep (The Highest Judge Of All

Protest Sign of the Week: Pissed Off Quaker (Fighting Oligarchy since 1640)

Quote of the Week: We live in an oligarchy, but with the humidity, it feels like a dictatorship. --Judah Friedlander

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Being conceived in a Jeep doesn't make you part Cherokee.

Today's Peace of History: July 25, 1963: The Limited Test Ban Treaty was initiated following 10 days of intense negotiations among the U.S.S.R., U.S., and the United Kingdom.

I like to buy a glass of wine with cream cheese snacks. Sorry, ma'm we only take cash or credit cards.

Only your compassion and your loving kindness are invincible and without limit. --Nhat Hanh

Dust bunnies killed my Cleaning Fairy. ϔ Despite space being a vacuum, Mars if very dusty. ϔ You come from dust and you return to dust. That's why I never dust; it could be someone I knew.

..........I'm gonna hang them out early..........Dolly Parton …..Washday Blues

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, July 25, 2025: dOmestic ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Tough times go away, tough people do not. --Walter Payton

Cost of War: As of 07/10/25 State Department Costs: $270,637,677,412

As of 07/17/25 State Department Costs: $270,085,624,958

As of 07/10/25 Homeland Security: $1,205,675,449,627

As of 07/17/25 Homeland Security: $1,205,075,717,060

As of 07/10/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,315,022,564,160

As of 07/17/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,312,480,652,044

As of 07/10/25 Military Costs: $3,158,128,369,914

As of 07/17/25 Military Costs: $3,156,957,706,759

As of 07/10/25 Veterans Care: $4,393,469,441,497

As of 07/17/25 Veterans Care: $4,381,782,384,682

As of 07/10/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,342,935,654,166

As of 07/17/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,327,384,919,047

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Rudeness is a weak imitation of strength. --Eric Hoffer

Famous Last Words: A sadder and a wiser man, he rose the morrow morn. --Rime of the Ancient Mariner by Samuel Taylor Coleridge who died July 25, 1834 of a heart attack

..........She died and was buried in dirt.........Patty Duke …..The Housewife's Lament

I belong to a secret group that is trying to groom the country into acceptance of wine and cheese as dinner.

When we practice loving kindness and compassion we are the first ones to profit.

I used to clean windows for a living. When I got home my partner would say, “Hi, honey, how was other people's day?” ϔ I waved at my neighbor for 10 minutes this morning before I realized she was just cleaning her windows.

May Peace clear your heart

And Joy clean your spirit

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

cOrvine ePistle

 Famous First Words: You're so wrong, I ain't laughing... -Harry Fatt --Clifford Odets: Waiting For Lefty

Why did the homicide team investigate the murder of crows? Probable caws. {} Chris Crow became a pro wrestler and called himself Caws of Death.

Don't try to write with a broken pencil; it's pointless.

Every moment is an organizing opportunity, every person a potential activist, every minute a chance to change the world. --Dolores Huerta

..........It's the same story the crow told me, it's the only one he knows.........Grateful Dead …..Uncle John's Band

...to be free is not merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others. --Nelson Mandela

It is a cloudy Friday morning. The sky is gray and without texture. There is no wind to speak of, even the small willow branches at the top of the tree are hanging still. The complaint of a bluejay is the only birdsong. Puck has been out and is now asleep in the doorway to the office. Veronica has been out and has disappeared into the rest of the house. I am sipping coffee and trying to quell my anxiety. This morning we will go to Jeff's apartment and see what needs to be done to get this stuff out. On that happy note...

Hope your weekend is something to crow about, Birders.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Schrödinger's Epstein Files...

Oddity of the Week: We finally got Jeff's death certificate and there is no date of death on it. There doesn't even seem to be a place for Date of Death on it. There is even a time (actual or presumed) of death, but not a date. There the date the death was certified and the date the certificate was issued.

My local murder of crows have taken up gardening. So far they've only planted crowcus. {} A flock of crows on a mission is justifiable murder. {} Carrie Crow wanted to be a lawyer but they wouldn't let her into cawllege.

I hope to write something someday that's worth plagiarizing.

The activist is not the one who says the river is dirty. The activist is the one who cleans up the river. --Ross Perot

..........Smiling at me.........Ozzie & Harriet Nelson …..Blue Skies

Trivia Questions: Happy Day of Celebration of the Horse

1. How many horse years in a human year?

2. What country has the highest horse population?

3. Horses can get the hiccups. True or False?

4. What does a horse with “a lot of chrome” mean?

5. What natural bodily function (of most mammals) do horses lack?

Big Hello: āyubūvan – Sidhara (Sri Lanka) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Due to recent events Heidegger discussions are no longer permitted on the patio.

Suggestion of the Week: Save time by crying about two things at the same time.

Insult of the Week: He was a tool of the boss, without brains or backbone. --Franz Kafka Metamorphosis

My Crowcrew have taken over the backyard. They just laid out a Crowquet field. {} The crows had a birthday party down at the crowbar. They spent the whole night drinking cawmospolitians.

Sure, it's simple, writing for kids is as easy as bringing them up. --Ursula K LeGuin

Activism is my rent for living on the planet. --Alice Walker

..........Just a little too late.........Shinedown …..The Crow and the Butterfly

Moonbeam: You guys are both saying the same thing. The only reason you're arguing is because you're using different words. --S I Hayakawa

Blasphemy of the Week: 2000 years from now, people will not understand the difference between “butt dial” and “booty call” and this is exactly why the Bible is hard to understand. --Submitted by MMS

Coffee Joke of the Week: When life gives you lemons, trade it for coffee.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's a shipment of new adjectives to describe how messed up everything is. --Lars Submitted by The New Yorker

Yeah, yeah, we've all seen the picture of two crows labeled attempted murder. But, face it, three crows are still barely manslaughter. {} Little known fact, before the crowbar was invented, crows drank at home.

Why I write: because kidnapping people and forcing them to act out your interesting make-believe worlds is technically illegal.

The pain and the suffering that I went through made me an activist. It made me stronger; it made me more compassionate. --Lecrae

..........I've been crashing rainbows..........Bobby Sherman …..Hey, Mister Sun

1) Conversion of horse's age to human years, multiply the horse's age by 2.2 OR count the first horse year as 10 human years and then multiply by 2 for each horse year.

Almanac: It is Friday, July 18, 2025. The moon entered its first quarter yesterday (7/17) and is in Taurus. Today is Celebration of the Horse Day, Insurance Nerd Day, International Mandela Day aka Nelson Mandela International Day, National Pajama Day, National Sour Candy Day, and Recreation Professional Day, Robin Hood Day, and World Listening Day.

Among those born on this day were Robert Hooke (1635), William Makepeace Thackeray (1811), Clifford Odets (1906), S.I. Hayakawa (1906), Andrei Gromyko (1909), Red Skelton (1910), Hume Cronyn (1911), Harriet Hilliard Nelson (1916), Nelson Mandela (1918), John Glenn Jr. (1921), Hunter S. Thompson (1939), James Brolin (1940), Bobby Sherman (1943), and Ricky Skaggs (1954).

On July eighteenth the great fire of Rome began (64), Ty Cobb got his 4,000th hit (1927), Uruguay accepted its constitution (1951), and Billy Martin suspended Reggie Jackson for not bunting (1978).

Night Sky, 7/18: Stargazers will be treated with an eye-popping planet parade roughly an hour before sunrise on July 19 and 20. Jupiter, Venus, the crescent moon, and Saturn will be visible to the naked eye, with Neptune (adjacent to Saturn) and Uranus (near Venus) visible via telescope. Watch the lineup in the east and southeast sky, and look for clear eastern vistas since Jupiter won’t travel far above the horizon. https://www.travelandleisure.com/july-2025-stargazing-astronomy-guide-11766109

Fraternal Picture of the Week: One mermaid and two pirates – one must be the pirate captain, he has such an official looking hat.

This Week: Saturday, July 19- National Caviar Day & Woodie Wagon Day & Words With Friends Day

Sunday, July 20 – Mon Day & National Ice Cream Day & Lake Superior Day & World Chess Day

Night Sky, 7/20: The Delta Aquariid meteor shower begins to be visible and peaks around the 29^th. It's in Aquarius. https://earthsky.org/astronomy-essentials/everything-you-need-to-know-delta-aquarid-meteor-shower/

Monday, July 21 – Global Hug Your Kid Day & International Balloon Holiday & National Be Someone Day

Tuesday, July 22 – Casual Pi Day & Be A Good Teammate Day & Spooners Day

Wednesday, July 23 – Gorgeous Grandma Day & Hot Enough For Ya Day & National Sprinkle Day

Thursday, July 24 – Cousins Day & International Self Care Day & National Tequila Day & Tell An Old Joke Day

Night Sky, 7/24: New Moon in Cancer c. 7:10 pm

All the crows in my local murder are nestdoor neighbors. {} Carol Crow is a famous baker. Her specialty is Crowconbush.

Easy reading is damn hard writing. --Nathaniel Hawthorne

I and you and everyone else has to be a political activist. --Micahel Moore

..........Pretty flowers were made for blooming.........Ricky Scaggs …..Little Maggie

2) The United States has the highest horse population with more than 9 million horses.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I could've given them a word wedgie so wedged they'd be picking syllables out of their pride for a week. But I was feeling merciful and slightly dehydrated. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Moonbeam: When the going gets weird, the weird go pro. --Hunter S Thompson

English Major Joke of the Week: English is what you get when Vikings learn Latin and use it to shout at Germans, and then the French shout back. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Fun Fact of the Week: Happy National Pajama Day! The US pajama market is a significant segment of the broader sleepwear industry. It;s worth is estimated at $45.67 billion.

Video of the Week: John Glenn preparing for this Friendship launch, 1962.

Where globalization means, as it so often does, that the rich and powerful now have new means to further enrich and empower themselves at the cost of the poorer and weaker, we have a responsibility to protest in the name of universal freedom. --Nelson Mandela

I have an activist's desire to improve people's lives. --Bill de Blasio

Clarence Crow told me it was about 10 miles as the car drives but crows can do it in 6. {} My crows love me, just caws.

Sorry, we only accept manuscripts through an agent except spy novels which we only accept through a double agent.

..........Stay down to Earth with me.........Ricky Scaggs …..Don't Get Above Your Raisin'

3) True: Horses can get the hiccups, also known as “thumps”. More Than You Care To Know About Horse Hiccups

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: You are here. Against all odds. A bundle of atoms with opinions, shoes, and unfinished laundry. --Submitted by 42 Collective

Weird Word of the Week: Erf – a plot of land https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/erf

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Sterilize and clean stains from dentures. Mix one teaspoon of Clorox Bleach in a glass of cold water, and soak the dentures for ten minutes. Then rinse the dentures well and brush as usual. The bleach whitens the false teeth and makes the dentures sparkling clean, removing coffee stains. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox.html

Conversely, one has a moral responsibility to disobey unjust laws. --Martin Luther King, Jr

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. --W Somerset Maugham

Do Christian crows believe in Stant Caws? {} When my local murder gets into a fussing fit, a cawcophony, if you will, I call it a cawnversation. {} Crows never deal with airport baggage claims. They only carrion.

...........It seems I hear you whisper in the gloom.........Ricky Scaggs …..Crying My Heart Out Over You

4) Chromed Out Horse – lots of white on the legs.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Anxiety: Get Ready! Me: For what Anxiety: I don't know, just hurry. --Submitted by INRITH

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Readercon 34 (17-20, Burlington, MA) The conference on imaginative literature, thirty-fourth edition. https://readercon.org/

Life Hack of the Week: Make your guns totally invisible to the government by wrapping them in Epstein's Client List. --Anarchist Beauties

Spark of Joy of the Week: Disappearing Civil Liberties Mug ($19.95) When you pour in hot liquid, your bill of rights disappears. https://philosophersguild.com/products/disappearing-civil-liberties-mug

Being an activist is about getting things done. It's not about standing around shaking your fist in anger. --Christine Quinn

Political crows are forever cawcusing. {} The rooster crows so early in the morning to get a word in before the crows wake up.

Dear readers: If you like my book, please tell your friends. If you don't, tell your enemies. I'm not picky about sales. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

..........I've lost the heart I had a claim on.........Bobby Sherman …..Blame It On The Pony Express

5) Horses cannot vomit because a muscular valve prevents food in the stomach from returning to the esophagus.

Protest Sign of the Week: Without Due Process It's Just Kidnapping

Quote of the Week: The Earth is littered with the ruins of empires that believed they were eternal. --Camille Paglia

Second Cousin Once Removed Quote of the Week: I didn't want to be gay. I wanted to be … I wanted an easy life. And you know what? I am gay, and I still have an easy life. --Jane Lynch

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Herr Hegel writes gobbledygook and gibberish on a scale that many have emulated, but none have surpassed.. -Richard Porter --Submitted by Philosopher Games

Today's Peace of History: July 18, 1848: The first Woman's Rights Convention in the U.S. opened at Seneca Falls, NY. Its “Declaration of Sentiments” launched the movement of women to be included in the constitution

An activist is one who is actively involved in creating community, whether that is locally in their neighborhood or internationally. It is an admirable quality. --Jasmine Guy

Careful, you don't want to end up in my novel.

Admit it, crows feet don't even look good on crows. {} You know what they say: birds of a feather plan bank heists together. {} If you cross the bands Kansas and Counting Crows, you get Kerrin

..........Well, I'm telling you, baby, I'm through with you.........Harriet Nelson …..Just Because

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, July 18, 2025: cOrvine ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Distant Cousin of Today's Peace of History: July 18, 1979: SALT II (Strategic Arms Limitation Treaty), an agreement to put limits on both America’s and the Soviet Union’s long-range missiles and bombers, was signed by Presidents Jimmy Carter and Leonid Brezhnev. This was the first arms-reduction treaty between the two superpowers. It was signed despite the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan the previous year.

Moonbeam: To love and win is the best thing;. To love and lose is the next best. --William Makepeace Thackeray

Cost of War:

As of 07/17/25 State Department Costs: $270,085,624,958

As of 07/10/25 State Department Costs: $269,526,750,323

As of 07/17/25 Homeland Security: $1,205,075,717,060

As of 07/10/25 Homeland Security: $1,204,468,754,577

As of 07/17/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,312,480,652,044

As of 07/10/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,301,919,782,299

As of 07/17/25 Military Costs: $3,156,957,706,759

As of 07/10/25 Military Costs: $3,155,772,525,437

As of 07/17/25 Veterans Care: $4,381,782,384,682

As of 07/10/25 Veterans Care: $4,369,949,228,564

As of 07/17/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,327,384,919,047

As of 07/10/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,312,638,775,641

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

In our country we go to prison first and then become President. --Nelson Mandela

Famous Last Words: Good Night and God Bless --Red Skelton as the sign off on the Red Skelton Show

..........Thought I had you beat..........Nina Simone …..Old Jim Crow

Being an activist is not easy. --Joshua Wong

I bought a pen that can write underwater. It can write other words as well.

The murder knew it was a scarecrow not a human; it wasn't looking at its phone. {} Are albino crows cawcasian?

May Peace rest on your shoulder

And Joy eat from your hand

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

aTomic ePistle

Famous First Words: Ground control to Uncle Tom... David Bowie Space Oddity

The Doomsday Clock is a metaphor for how close the Earth is to nuclear war – a war which might clear the face of the planet. It was proposed in 1947. Midnight is doomsday – holocaust. It was originally set at 7 minutes to midnight. It has been changed 8 times since then. Currently the time is set at 89 seconds to midnight. Are you laughing yet? It's all fun and games until someone loses their neutrons.

Love is the purest form of a soul at peace. --Matthew Donnelly

..........make it magnificent, tonight, right.........Blondie …..Atomic

Suffrage: At the same time, we believe that this class of American citizens should protest emphatically and continually against the curtailment of their political rights. --Niagara Movement's Declaration of Principles.

It is a warm (79°F at 7:30 am) Friday morning. The sky is covered with lumpy white clouds that may or may not be moving slowly northeast. The sun shines through breaks in them and lights up the greens of the various foliage and colors of flowers and houses and birds. I have switched from pistachios to peanuts due to the price of new, fresh pistachios. The local family of blue jay – two big, three smaller – has come to snack but left in a huff when Puck came out for his morning business. The lone, little squirrel has also come for a bite of breakfast. If the crows have been here they came and went before I got out of bed. There is a lazy breeze that seems to excite the tall, scraggy looking hollyhocks, but barely moves the willow branches. Apparently it is too hot even to appreciate the wind. Puck is now asleep at my feet and Veronica is upset that I won't leave the door open so she can sit in the house with her face outside and intimidate small bits of wildlife who have a taste for peanuts. I am sipping decaf, chewing chocolate chip cookies and writing to you. All in all, a really good morning.

Hope our weekend explodes with fun, sunbeams, not bombs.

Our condolences to Henry VIII on losing the blessing of the Catholic Church. (7/11/1533). He not only divorced his wife he also divorced his church.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The Guide has only two settings: 1. Calming lies 2. Panic-inducing facts. --Submitted by 42 Collective

People are making apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow. :: God: How can it be that people elected a madman bent on destroying my creation: Michael: He had cats in his commercials.

We do not want riches, we want peace and love. --Red Cloud

..........For man's been endowed with a mushroom shaped cloud.........Kingston Trio …..Merry Minuet

Happy National Motorcycle Day! I'm looking to buy a motorcycle that makes me look cool, young, attractive, thinner, and lowers my cholesterol.

Trivia Questions: Happy World Population Day!

1. There are 8 billion (8,000000000) people on the planet today. How long did it take us to get there from 7 billion?

2. When is the estimated date for reaching 9 billion?

3. Which country has the lowest population density?

4. Which country has the highest population density?:

5. Worldwide are there more women or men?

Big Hello: Asalāmu alekum – Sindhi (Pakistan) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing. The secret to adult life is nearly the same. --Submitted by 42 Collective

Image of the Week: The Squirrel and the Pistachios … after the crows were gone.

Insult of the Week: She's nuttier than squirrel poo. --J K Rowling: Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows

A Little Background on Insult of the Week: When I googled “Literary Insults” the first response was Amazon (It's almost always first) with this Heading: Literary Insults – Fast free delivery w/Prime. Ebay at least said Book of Insults.

Son, it's not a nuclear war. That's just the fact checker's head exploding every time Teddy Dozevelt* opens his mouth. :: Cockroaches can survive a nuclear war. Maybe WWIII is one of those cockroach conspiracies.

*Jimmy Kimmel's 78 Nicknames

Every act of kindness spreads peace to the world, love to the heart, light to us all. --Mary Davis

..........A weapon that would settle the score.........Rush …..Manhattan Project

Moonbeam: Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish. --John Quincy Adams

Blasphemy of the Week: In order to find the god that made men, we have to stop following the god that men made. --Submitted by Hippy Hour

It's not an actual motorcycle. It's an exercise bike. I'm hoping it will make me actually use it.

Coffee Joke of the Week: I hear Starbucks is firing workers who wear tea-shirts.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you have nothing to do, please do not do it here. --Submitted by UUHS

I predict in years to come there'll be a nuclear war in the Middle East, which'll leave only one country in the Persian Gulf. Just Kuwait and sea. :: How many times did I say it, Howard? Make sure the bomb shelter has a can opener.

Peace is not the absence of power. It is the presence of love. --Sri Chinmoy

..........This is just a nightmare.........Radiohead …..4 Minute Warning

1) It took 11 years to grow the population from seven to eight billion. We reached 7 billion in 2011 and 8 billion in 2022.

Almanac: It is Friday, July 11, 2025. The moon was full (Blessing aka Buck) yesterday (7/10) and is in Capricorn. Today is Cheer Up the Lonely Day, National Rainier Cherries Day, National Swimming Pool Day, Slurpee Day aka Birthday of 7-11, and World Population Day. Because it is the second Friday it is also Collector Car Appreciation Day, National French Fry Day, and National Motorcycle Day.

Among those born on this day were Robert the Bruce (1274), Thomas Bowdler (1754), John Quincy Adams (1767), E.B. White (1899), Harry Von Zell (1906), Yul Brynner (1915), Tab Hunter (1931), Deborah Harry (Blondie, 1945), and Leon Spinks (1953).

On July eleventh Henry VIII was excommunicated (1533), Burr killed Hamilton in a duel (1804), the US invaded Canada (1812), asteroid #100 was discovered (Hekate, 1868), the Niagara Movement was organized (1905), the Ivory Coast, Dahomey, Upper Volta, and Niger all declared independence (1960), Space Oddity was released (1969), asteroid #2489 was discovered (Suvorov, 1975), and Martin Luther King, Jr was awarded the Medal of Freedom posthumously (1977).

Night Sky, 7/11: To the right of Antares is that roughly vertical row of Beta, Delta, and fainter Pi Scorpii. The middle one, Delta Sco, is the brightest — obviously so. But it didn't used to be. It used to be a trace fainter than Beta. Delta is a strange variable star, a fast-rotating blue subgiant throwing off luminous gas from its equator. It was assumed for centuries to be stable, Delta doubled in brightness unexpectedly in summer 2000, then dipped down and up again several times from 2005 to 2010, and has remained essentially steady at peak brightness (magnitude 1.7) ever since. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Graduation 2025

This Week: Saturday, July 12 – Different Colored Eyes Day & International Cave Day & International Skinny Dip Day & Simplicity Day

Sunday, July 13 – International Day of Rock n' Roll & National Barbershop Music Appreciation Day

Night Sky, 7/13: Venus, brilliant at magnitude –4.1, rises above the east-northeast horizon a half hour or more before the first glimmer of dawn. Venus climbs higher until the dawn sky grows too bright. In a telescope Venus's shrinking globe (now only about 16 arcseconds pole to pole) has become gibbous, 65% sunlit.

Monday, July 14 – Bastille Day & International Nude Day & World Chimpanzee Day

Tuesday, July 15 – National Give Something Away Day & National Pet Fire Safety Day & Saint Swithin's Day**

**If it rains on the feast of St Swithin it will rain on each of the following 40 days.

Wednesday, July 16 – National Atomic Veteran's Day & Take Your Poet To Work Day & World Snake Day

Thursday, July 17 – Get To Know Your Customers Day & International Sister Cities Day

Night Sky, 7/17: The moon enters the last quarter and will be in Aries.

What is my plan if nuclear war breaks out? I'm pretty sure my boss expects me to work that day; so, I'll be working. :: Putin's propagandists on TV said nuclear war is fine because patriotic Russians will go to Heaven. Heaven heard this and immediately applied to join NATO.

Peace begins with love and respect. --Anthony D Williams

..........Everybody's got a bomb, we could all die anyday.........Prince …..1999

2) Population growth is slowing. It will take approximately 15 years (until 2037) to reach 9 billion.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It's an absolutely brutal time to be even remotely intelligent. --Davidson Boswell --Submitted by jm or ks

Moonbeam: Everything is life is somewhere else, and you get there in a car. --E B White

What do you mean you were having so much fun riding your new bike that you lost track of time? You've been gone for over a year

Fun Fact of the Week: Space Oddity by David Bowie was first released July 11, 1969 as a 7-inch single. Later it became the opening track of Bowie's second studio album, David Bowie. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tRMZ_5WYmCg

Audio of the Week: Chad Mitchell Trio: Rhymes for the Irreverent Hammacher Schlemmer is selling a shelter (2:44)

Civil Liberty: We believe also in protest against the curtailment of our civil rights. --Niagara Movement's Declaration of Principles

We should really love each other in peace and harmony, instead we're fussin' n fighting like we ain't supposed to be. --Bob Marley

I have a feeling this is the year to grow up or glow up. :: At least I'm not to the point of waking up and checking the headlines for nuclear “incidents”.

..........Well they danced and sang when the bang went bang.........David Bowie …..Bombers

3) Greenland has the lowest population density with 0.14 people per square kilometer. The Falkland Islands have the second lowest density.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Absurdity is the public school assigning you The Grapes of Wrath at 16 and tear gassing you at 26 for understanding it. --Aren R LeBrun --Submitted by 1stKAFB

Weird Word of the Week: Taradiddle – a fib, nonsense, a small lie. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/taradiddle

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Purify a humidifier. Add two drops of Clorox Bleach per gallon of water when refilling your humidifier to prevent bacteria from growing in the water. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox.html

If you want inner peace, unconditionally forgive everyone. If you want world peace, be an example and love everyone. --Debasish Mridha

They say in nuclear war only the cockroaches will survive. That means most countries will still have a functioning government. :: Cockroaches can survive a nuclear war, but hit them with a newspaper and they die. See how dangerous the media is?

...........The hands that threaten doom.........Iron Maiden …..2 Minutes To Midnight

4) The country with the highest population density is Macau (China) with a density of 21,054 people per square kilometer. Monaco is next highest.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Let's admit it: We put “Made with love” on our home crafted gifts because “Made with cursing, 2 trips to the craft store, and lots of wine” just won't fit on a cute little lable...https://www.facebook.com/churchmouseuk

I taught my Harley to meditate so it could find its inner hog.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Shore Leave 2025 (11-13, Lancaster.PA) celebrate all things geeky and nerdy https://www.shore-leave.com/

Whatever This Is of the Week: Meanwhile: Now It's now been confirmed that Vikings were active at a Newfoundland settlement nearly 500 years before Christopher Columbus crossed the Atlantic. Well, this changes everything. Now we know that Vikings didn't discover America 500 years before Columbus didn't discover America. --Stephen Colbert

Spark of Joy of the Week: July 11, 1968: The American Indian Movement (AIM) was founded in Minneapolis, Minnesota, by George Mitchell, Dennis Banks, Clyde Bellecourt, and 200 others. They gathered to organize in order to deal with widespread and persistent poverty among native Americans, and unjust treatment from all levels of government.

Love is the key to ending hatred and finding peace. --Unknown

Why did Oppenheimer invent the atomic bomb? Because he wanted the world to lighten up. :: Flat earthers are ahead of their time; after nuclear war the planet may very well be flat.

..........Although it may be a pile of debris..........Tom Lehrer …..So Long, Mom (A Song for World War III)

5) Males make up about 50.4% and females 49.6% of the world's population.

Protest Sign of the Week: Let Them Eat Teslas

Quote of the Week: If the nukes fly can it be in the morning? I don't want to work all day then just come home to nukes. --Unknown --Submitted by 1stKAFB

Some of y'all should carry a plant around to replace the oxygen you waste.

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The US isn't even a country; it's just four corporations in a trench coat. --Transgender Marx https://www.facebook.com/MorePerfectUS

Today's Peace of History: July 11, 1905: The Niagara Movement, precursor of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP), was formed in Buffalo, New York.

Love and compassion are the pillars of world peace. --Dalai Lama

If four out of five people suffer from radiation poisoning, does that mean the fifth one enjoys it? :: My grandpa survived Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Being in Australia helped.

..........All suffused with an incandescent glow.........Tom Lehrer …..We Will All Go Together When We Go

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, July 11, 2025: aTomic ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith.

That was a wheelie good ride.

Moonbeam: Those expressions are omitted which cannot with propriety be read aloud in the family. --Thomas Bowdler

Cost of War:

As of 07/10/25 State Department Costs: $269,526,750,323

As of 07/03/25 State Department Costs: $268,976,897,099

As of 07/10/25 Homeland Security: $1,204,468,754,577

As of 07/03/25 Homeland Security: $1,203,871,494,178

As of 07/10/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,351,919,782,299

As of 07/03/25 Interest on War Debt:$1,310,383,960,976

As of 07/10/25 Military Costs: $3,155,772,525,437

As of 07/03/25 Military Costs: $3,154,606,420,727

As of 07/10/25 Veterans Care: $4,369,949,228,564

As of 07/03/25 Veterans Care: $4,358,307,253,358

As of 07/10/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,312,638,775,641

As of 07/03/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,296,147,556,583

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Education: Common school education should be free to all American children and compulsory. High school training should be adequately provided for all, and college training should be the monopoly of no class or race in any section of our common country. --Niagara Movement's Declaration of Principles

Famous Last Words: But I know we'll meet again some sunny day. --Lyrics We'll Meet Again played at the end of Dr Strangelove or How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The Bomb.

..........One day, maybe next week.........Blondie …..One Way Or Another

Peace and love! Peace and love! --Ringo Starr

By tightly securing our Nuclear Arsenal through human, digital, mechanical, and chemical means, we've been able to almost completely eliminate the risk of nuclear warhead explosions due to accidents or hostile attacks, however if these past four year have taught us anything it's that we also need to equip out nukes with child locks. :: My roommate is a physicist; he often brings home fission chips.

May Peace shield you

And Joy protect you

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh: