Upper Crust ePistle

Famous First Words: This commencement dance is badly managed. --Eugene O'Neill The Great God Brown

Happy National Pie Day!! Not All Heroes Wear Capes; Some Bake Pies. I woke up this morning and the entire road was covered with pie. It was certainly a desserted street. ππ Yes, I'm into fitness...fittin' this piece of pie into my mouth.

The tyranny of a prince in an oligarchy is not so dangerous to the public welfare as the apathy of a citizen in a democracy. --Montesquieu

..........And let's have another piece of pie.........Irving Berlin …..Let's Have Another Cup Of Coffee

Article 4: The United States will not continue its military involvement or intervene in the internal affairs of South Vietnam. --1973 Paris Peace Accords

It is a bitter cold Friday morning. The temperature is 9°F and the wind is bearing down from the north at 16 mph. It is not just willow branches that are dancing, it is also large limbs thrashing about. There is no birdsong or bird flights; they're all still in bed trying to keep warm. The weather channel is also predicting 7 inches of snow tomorrow and temperatures in single digits all next week. But I am sipping hot decaf, creamed and sweetened, in a warm house where doorways are reinforced with tubular towels to keep the cold from creeping under. I have a full pantry. My dog is a faithful, if somewhat demanding, companion and Dashiell's cat amuses me. I have books to read and a computer to write on. And I am learning ASL. I will survive. Stay warm, ya'll.

Hope your weekend is easy as pie and twice as delicious, dear little pumpkin-eaters

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Nobody thought the revolution would start in Minneapolis...except Prince. --Twin Cities Geeks

Month of the Week: January is Teen Driving Awareness Month! You should be aware that when I worked at the KS School For The Visually Impaired, I obtained a copy of Defensive Driving in Braille for a student in Tonganoxie, KS. Good Luck Out There.

This pie and I have great chemistry; we go way back to the crust. ππ A pie walks into a pub. The barman says, “sorry we don't serve food”.

Science may have found a cure for most evils; but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all – the apathy of human beings. --Helen Keller

..........Blueberry, apple, cherry, pumpkin, and plum.........Bob Dylan …..Country Pie

Trivia Questions: Happy Anniversary to the 20^th Amendment to the US Constitution

1. What is the 20^th Amendment?

2. What were the terms before the 20^th Amendment?

3. Who proposed the amendment?

4. Why was the amendment proposed?

5. How long did the amendment wait for ¾ of the states to ratify it? (There were 48 states at the time.)

Big Hello: selam – Tigrinya (Ethiopia & Eritrea) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It takes a lot of ignorant racism to live on stolen land and complain about immigration. --Native Lovers

Image of the Week: Copenhagen 1/17/26

I'm not saying I'm a little slice of heaven; but I do have a great crumb. ππ That old adage – easy as pie – it is about eating it is not making it. You do realize that, right?

Hate is not the opposite of love; apathy is. --Rollo May

..........Can you bake a pie? Neither can I.........Ethel Merman & Ray Middleton …..Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better

Moonbeam: Television – a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done. --Ernie Kovacs

Blasphemy of the Week: Jesus Heals Demon-Possessed Man By Taking Away His Smartphone. --Submitted by Wittenburg Door

Coffee Joke of the Week: A guy walks into a cafe and orders a coffee to go. The coffee gets up and leaves.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The cat who was completely obsessed with my bump when I was pregnant is quite uninterested in the baby now that she's out. It's a weird way to find out my cat is a Republican. --Elayne Boosler

I only have pies for you. ππ Ah, Granny Smith, you are the apple of my pie. ππ A slice of apple pie costs $2.75 in Jamaica and $3.50 in the Bahamas. These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.

Government is at its worst when you have apathy from its citizens. --Jesse Ventura

..........And she tried to make a pumpkin pie..........Kessock Rap Band …..Grandma's Apple Pie

1) The terms of the President and the Vice President shall end at noon on the 20th day of January, and the terms of Senators and Representatives at noon on the 3rd day of January, of the years in which such terms would have ended if this article had not been ratified; and the terms of their successors shall then begin. See More~~None of the rest is on the test.

Almanac: It is Friday, January 23, 2026. The moon will reach its first quarter on Sunday (1/25) and is in Pisces. Today is Maternal Health Awareness Day, National Handwriting Day, National Pie Day, and Snowplow Mailbox Hockey Day.

Among those born on this day were John Barclay (1582), Edouard Manet (1832), Andrija Mohorovicic (1857), Antonio Gramsci (1891), Frank Carlson (1893), Randolph Scott (1898), Ernie Kovacs (1919), John Polanyi (1929), Chita Rivera (1933), Rutger Hauer (1944), Princess Caroline Louise Marguerite Grimaldi (1957), Mariska Hargitay (1964), Ariadna Gil (1969), and Tanya Harding (1972).

On January twenty third the Islamic calendar started (638), the first English Parliament convened (1265), Elizabeth I opened the Royal Exchange of London (1571), the Treaty of Bärwalde was signed (1631), New Madrid earthquake (7.8, 1812), Blackwell became the first female physician in the US (1849), Curtis became first native American US senator (R: KS, 1907), The Great God Brown premiered (1926), 20th Amendment ratified (changes Inauguration date, 1933), Treasure of the Sierra Madre opened (1948), Venezuela adopted its constitution (1961), After the Fall premiered (1964), the entire population of Istanbul was placed under 24 hour house arrest (1972), Vietnam War Accords announced (1973), Roots premiered (1977), the Julian Period will begin (3268).

Night Sky, 1/23: Look for a waxing crescent moon near Saturn and Neptune, visible in the early evening with Saturn appearing golden and Neptune nearby, requiring binoculars; Jupiter will be shining brightly all night.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Not so speedy morning ~~That is Sonic isn't it?

This Week: Saturday, January 24 – Beer Can Day & Belly Laugh Day & Talk Like A Grizzled Prospector Day

Sunday, January 25 – A Room of One's Own Day & IV Nurses Day & National Bible Sunday & Opposite Day & Robert Burns Day

Night Sky, 1/25 : First Quarter Moon at 11:47 pm in Taurus.

Monday, January 26 – Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day & Clashing Clothes Day & Toad Hollow Day of Encouragement

Night Sky, 1/26: Jupiter dominates the eastern sky after sunset as winter's brightest stars rise through moonlight, including Sirius, Procyon, and Orion

Tuesday, January 27 – Fancy Rat and Mouse Day & Holocaust Memorial Day & VietNam Peace Day

Wednesday, January 28 – National Kazoo Day & Data Privacy Day & National Gift of the Lady Bug Day

Night Sky, 1/28: Sunrise: 7:29 am Sunset: 5:37 pm (10 hours and seven minutes of daylight) Moonset: 10:57 am Moonrise: 10:54 pm

Thursday, January 29 – Freethinkers Day & Curmudgeon Day & Seeing Eye Dog Day & National Puzzle Day & Thomas Paine Day

My brain says salad but my heart says pecan pie. ππ At night when the bakery is closed, ghosts come in and make boo-berry pie which they eat with I-scream.

Apathy is a sort of living oblivion. --Horace Greeley

..........You bring the zest, I'll add the cream.........Scott Frenzel …..Key Lime Pie

2) Before the 20^th Amendment the US presidential terms began on March 4^th and ended on March 3^rd.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: How come there are Pop Tarts but not Mom Tarts? I blame the Pastryarchy. … https://www.facebook.com/groups/821482974647309/

Moonbeam: Can Kansas, the heart of America from almost any viewpoint, lead this transition into peace and transform our new-found productive strength for the common welfare, so that it may bring a fuller life for us instead of ruin for others. --Frank Carlson, governor of Kansas 1947-50

Fun Fact of the Week: It's Sugar Awareness Week (18-23) Mary Poppins said “a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down.” Eli Lilly said, “A syringe-full of medicine makes the sugar go down.”

Video of the Week: Andie MacDowell singing I Love Pie - From the movie Michael (:21) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzkSjOdwSFQ

The dismantlement of all military bases in South VietNam of the United States and of the other foreign countries mentioned above. --1973 Paris Peace Accords

..........She got a big bad mixing bowl.........Tony Wiseguy …..The Apple Pie Ala Mode

Fear is better than apathy because fear makes us do something. --Emiliano Salinas

Never believe a pie. They sugarcoat everything. ππ Life's short. Eat pie for breakfast. ππ That pie recipe sure gave me pumpkin to think about.

3) The 20^th Amendment was proposed and championed by progressive Republican Senator George W Norris of Nebraska. He authored the initial resolutions in 1923 and reintroduced them until Congress passed it in 1932.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I don't have a guardian angel. I have a dumpster diving raccoon. We are just digging through the trash of life together, hissing at problems and hoping for the best. --Submitted by Feral Spiritualists

Weird Word of the Week: Jentacular – pertaining to breakfast https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jentacular

Dragon of the Week: Dragon Kitty Lair

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Condition Hair. To give your hair a great shine, pour a can of Coca Cola into your hair, working it in well, and then rinse your hair with water. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola.html

Not So Fun Fact of the Week: The Make-up Billionaire, Ronald S Lauder, is the mastermind behind the Mafia Madman's annexation of Greenland. You can boycott his products: Estée Lauder, Clinique, MAC cosmetics, La Mer, Bobbi Brown, and Aveda. Read All About It ~~Gave the Cheeto Chief a ton of money and more concealer than he can ever blend in.

...........Makes your eyes light up and your tummy say “Howdy”.........Dinah Shore …..Shoo Fly Pie and Apple Pan Dowdy

Supermarket tabloids and celebrity gossip shows are not just innocently shallow entertainment, but a fundamental part of a much larger movement that involves apathy, greed, and hierarchy. --Joseph Gordon-Levitt

Whatever is funny is subversive. Every joke is ultimately a custard pie. ππ No more Mr Nice Pie!

4) It was called the Lame Duck Amendment because the four months between November elections and March inauguration left the incumbent administration in office long enough to do real mischief.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I Like My Democracy Neat – Not Diluted, No ICE

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: COSine 2026 (23-25, Colorado Springs, CO) ...the purple mountains majesty are getting awfully close... https://www.firstfridayfandom.org/cosine/

Red Haired Stepchild of Video of the Week: Ernie Kovacs and the Nairobi Trio (2:29)

Spark of Joy of the Week: January 23, 1973: President Richard Nixon announced a Vietnam peace deal. The president appeared on national television and said that National Security Adviser Henry A. Kissinger and North Vietnam's chief negotiator, Le Duc Tho, had initiated an agreement in Paris "to end the war and bring peace with honor in Vietnam and Southeast Asia." The agreement had actually been initiated six days beforehand.

..........She can bake a cherry pie as fast as a cat can wink an eye..........My Mother …..Billy Boy

The price of apathy towards public affairs is to be ruled by evil men. --Plato

Pies are lucky. They're always well rounded. ππ My quiche got a job flying airplanes. She's an actual pie-lot.

5) Congress approved the amendment on March 2, 1932.The required 36 states ratified on January 23, 1933. Florida became the 48^th and final state to ratify (April 26,1933).

Protest Sign of the Week: Elect A Rapist Expect To Be Royally Fucked

Quote of the Week: People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious. --Carl Jung

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Stop worrying about what other people think. I mean, have you met other people? --Submitted by Hippy Hour

Today's Peace of History: January 23, 1970: Called as witnesses, folksingers Judy Collins, Arlo Guthrie, Country Joe McDonald, Phil Ochs, and Pete Seeger were denied permission to sing as part of their testimony for the defense at the trial of "The Chicago Seven." Seven leaders of demonstrations at the 1968 Democratic National Convention in Chicago were being tried for conspiring to incite a riot as they protested the Vietnam war.

Another Peace of History: January 23, 1890: The United Mine Workers of America was formed through the amalgamation of the National Progressive Union (organized 1888) and the mine locals under the Knights of Labor, including all workers in the coal industry. The workers faced unstable employment, the prevalence of company towns (where the mine owners controlled all housing and commerce), and extremely hazardous working conditions.

..........Tastes so good, make a grown man cry..........Warrant …..Cherry Pie

Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike. --J K Rowling

How many chefs does it take to make a pie? 3.14. But it only takes one cow. ππ Pies never argue; they just roll with it.

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, January 23, 2026: Upper Crust ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: I believe that living means taking sides. Those who really live cannot help being a citizen and a partisan. Indifference and apathy are parasitism, perversion, not life. --Antonio Gramsci ~~He's also the guy that said, “The old world is dying, and the new world struggles to be born: now is the time of monsters.”

Cost of War:

As of 01/22/26 State Department Costs: $285,101,319,083

As of 01/15/26 State Department Costs: $284,549,700,991

As of 01/22/26 Homeland Security: $1,221,385,989,744

As of 01/15/26 Homeland Security: $1,220,786,857,468

As of 01/22/26 Interest on War Debt: $1,355,421,249,915

As of 01/15/26 Interest on War Debt: $1,353,880,648,371

As of 01/22/26 Military Costs: $3,188,801,426,503

As of 01/15/26 Military Costs: $3,187,631,857,429

As of 01/22/26 Veterans Care: $4,699,701,435,192

As of 01/15/26 Veterans Care: $4,688,024,639,270

As of 01/22/26 Total Cost of Wars: $10,750,413,743,647

As of 01/15/26 Total Cost of Wars: $10,734,876,695,374

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The parties shall exchange complete lists of captured military personnel and foreign civilians on the day of the signing of this Agreement. --1973 Paris Peace Accords

Famous Last Words: ...forever under my heart. --Eugene O'Neill Great God Brown

..........nothing tastes sweet, wet, salty, and dry..........Andie MacDowell ….I Love Pie

If moderation is a fault, then indifference is a crime. --Jack Kerouac

That sweet potato pie was yamtastic. ππ Pie is calling and I must go.

May Peace be your crust

And Joy be your filling

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

Falkor's ePistle

Famous First Words: there's nothing as something as one. --e e cummins ~~Happy National Nothing Day!

Hooray, It's Appreciate A Dragon Day!! Not All Heroes Wear Capes; Some Have Wings. We all know that dragons breathe fire; but did you know that when they eat spicy food (pepper farmers, strippers, drag queens) they become flame throwers. § My uncle Bert is a dragon dentist. He wears a welding mask and uses a cutting torch.

..........I get no kick from champagne.........Ethel Merman …..I Get A Kick Out Of You (Anything Goes)

As more men become more educated and women get educated, the value system has to be more enhanced and the respect for human dignity and human life is made better. --Ellen Johnson Sirleaf

It is a windy (11 mph) Friday morning. The sky is clear of clouds and the sun is shining brightly. Bare tree limbs are waving about and willow branches are thrashing the air frantically. And that little toy the crows left for me is banging against my backdoor on its string...tap, tap, tap. Ah, January in Kansas. Puck went out before daylight this morning and has been asleep under my desk since then. (Even when I slept a few extra winks in my recliner.) Veronica stopped by but when I refused to leave the door open for her to sit and watch the world go by, she left with only a look of disgust. I am fully awake now, drinking my coffee. enjoying the smoke that curls from the mouth of my twisty dragon incense burner, and writing to you. Great start to a day and a weekend.

Hope your weekend breathes fire, Dragon Wranglers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I can find Waldo faster than I can find the twist tie that I just set on the kitchen counter.

One of the most embarrassing things that happens to dragons is getting their talons caught in their wings. § The dragons that were fighting knights in armor took to carrying hot pad holders among their weapons. § Dragons consider candles a light snack.

..........Just the perfect blendship.........Ethel Merman and Bert Lahr …..Friendship (DuBarry Was A Lady)

Trivia Questions: It's trivia; it's a quiz, it's Superman

1. Who originally created Superman?

2. What is Superman's Kryptonian name?

3. When did Superman become a newspaper comic strip?

4. What is Clark Kent's middle name?

5. When did Superman stop being a newspaper comic strip?

Big Hello: Tashi delek – Tibetan https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: A group of local buffalo recently celebrated their 200^th year as a herd. It's their Bisontennial. --Submitted by Home Groan Puns

Image of the Week: Lawrence KS Protest 1/11/26

War Quote of the Week: Hawkeye: War isn’t Hell. War is war, and Hell is Hell. And of the two, war is a lot worse. ...who goes to Hell? ...sinners ..Exactly. There are no innocent bystanders in Hell, but war is chock full of them – little kids, cripples, old ladies. In fact, except for a few of the brass, almost everybody involved is an innocent bystander. M.A.S.H. Season 5, Episode 20: 2/15/77

Those long fairy tales (I don't like to mention names like Tolkein) do drag on. § The question most often posed to dragons fighting knights: Plain or crunchy?

..........Anything you can buy, I can buy cheaper.........Ethel Merman & Jerry Orbach …..Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better (Annie Get Your Gun)

Moonbeam: History is so subjective. The teller of it determines it. --Lin-Manuel Miranda

Blasphemy of the Week: Communism, Hypnotism And the Beatles A book by David A Noebel (1965).

Coffee Joke of the Week: Coffee: The ends justify the beans.

Is This Real of the Week: On Facebook, Budweiser posted and advertisement for their superbowl advertisement. Capitalism folding in on itself.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Honestly starting to think that the only safe place to be right now is the Epstein files. --Linsey Fagan for Texas

Never play tag with a dragon. They are flaming hot at tag. § Little known fact: dragon boats run on natural exhaust. § If I had a pet dragon I would take her to concerts and show those silly little cigarette lighters how it's done.

..........I hear singing and there's no one there.........Ethel Merman & Donald O'Connor …..You're Just In Love (Call Me Madam)

1) Jerry Siegel (writer) and Joe Shuster (artist) created Superman in Action Comics #1 published by National Allied Publications (a precursor to DC Comics) on April 18, 1938.

Almanac: It is Friday, January 16, 2026. The moon will be new on Sunday (1/18) and is in Capricorn. Today is Appreciate A Dragon Day, Civil Service Day, Fig Newton Day, National Nothing Day, National Quinoa Day, Religious Freedom Day, and Without A Scalpel Day. Because today is the third Friday in January it is also Hat Day and International Fetish Day.

Among those born on this day were Richard Savage (1697), Dorthe Engelbrechtsdatter (1634), Niccolo Piccinni (1728), Vladimir Sergeyevich Solovyov (1853), Harry Carey, Sr. (1878), Ruth Rose (1896), Fulgencio Batista (1901), Ethel Merman (1908), Jay Hanna "Dizzy" Dean (1911), Dian Fossey (1932), Marilyn Horne (1934), Ronnie Milsap (1944), Sade (1959), Don MacLean (1970), and Lin-Manuel Miranda (1980).

On January sixteenth Ivan IV crowned himself (1547), the British Museum opened (1759), San Francisco's Dramatic Chronicle began publication (1865), the refrigerated railroad car was patented (1868), the color organ was patented (1877), Home Rule for Ireland was accepted (1913), Prohibition was ratified (1919), the first assembly of the League of Nations met (1920), the Screen Actors Guild incorporated (1936), and the Superman comic strip debuted (1939),

Night Sky, 1/16: The bright stars of mighty Orion, the Hunter, shine in the southeastern sky during the evening. To the unaided eye, a patch of brightness below the Orion Nebula defines the southern tip of Orion's sword. The area is dominated by the bright, magnitude 2.75 star named Nair al Saif, and sometimes called Hatysa, Iota Orionis, and The Lost Jewel of Orion. Astronomers estimate that those two stars are approximately 40,000 times as luminous as our sun. The jewel is also readily seen in binoculars. In a backyard telescope, the entire area is surrounded by faint nebulosity that will be enhanced by a nebula filter.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: The Morning Briefing

This Week: Saturday, January 17 – Bald Eagle Appreciation Days (17-18), Popeye Day & Kid Inventors' Day

Sunday, January 18 – Pooh (Winnie the) Day & Thesaurus Day & World Snow Day

Night Sky, 1/18 : The moon will reach its new phase at 2:52 pm EST, 11:52 am PST, or 19:52 GMT.

Monday, January 19 – Martin Luther King Jr Day & National Popcorn Day & World Day of Migrants And Refugees & World Quark Day

Tuesday, January 20 – International Day of Acceptances & National Disc Jockey Day & Penguin Awareness Day

Wednesday, January 21 – Mariachi Day & National Hugging Day

Night Sky, 1/21: Sunrise: 7:25 am Sunset: 5:30 pm (9 hours, 44 minutes of daylight) Moonrise: 2:33 pm Moonset: 4:58 am

Thursday, January 22 – Answer Your Cat's Questions Day & Celebration of Life Day & Roe vs Wade Day

Two dragons walk into a bar. Doris Dragon says, “This place is roasting.” Deborah Dragon answers, “Then keep your trap shut, okay?” § Dragons: heating things up one selfie at a time.

..........Have a kumquat—have two.........Ethel Merman …..Mr Goldstone, I Love You (Gypsy)

2) Superman was named Kal-El at birth. His father was Jor-El. I don't know whether that means his last name is -El.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: MAGA is now boycotting Jeopardy. It's estimated they could lose up to 7 viewers. --Peter Gough

Moonbeam: We are like some poor flock of owls in places of confusion. --Dorthe Engelbrechtsdatter

Fun Fact of the Week: On January 16, 1966 folk singer Joan Baez was sentenced to 10 days in jail for participating in a protest which blocked the entrance to the Armed Forces Induction Center in Oakland, California. She was part of an action to impede the drafting of young men for the US war in Vietnam.

Second Is This For Real of the Week: 1/10/26 meeting of the “Melon Felon” and CEOs of oil companies: First, Trump showed up wearing a lapel pin of himself under the traditional American flag pin because of course he did. When a reporter asked him what it was, he said, "That's called a Happy Trump. Considering the fact that I’m never happy, I’m never satisfied. I will never be satisfied until we make America great again, but we’re getting pretty close, I tell you what. This is called a Happy Trump.” Source: Gale Mollett

Video of the Week: Dian Fossey Gorilla Fund: Adorable gorillas (:51) https://gorillafund.org/video-vault/?playlist=5997cb1&video=13510c8

All girls know that they can be anything now. That transformation is to me one of the most satisfying things. --Ellen Johnson Sirleaf

As a side hustle I rent portable event toilets. I paint dragons on them because I'm into dragons and because now I can call my business Commode-o-dragon. § Warning! Dating dragons is a fire hazard. § What did the dragon say when she came upon a vampire biting a neck? BOGO ...On the other hand there are dragons who hate it when their food touches.

..........Floating on a starlit ceiling.........Ethel Merman …..Ridin' High (Red, Hot, And Blue)

3) Superman became a daily newspaper comic strip on 1/16/39. A separate, color Sunday strip was added on November 5^th of that year.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Happiness is an inside job. --ASL Fingerspelling

Weird Word of the Week: Pissified: when you are both pissed off and mystified at their stupidity at the same time. --Submitted by UUHS https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Pissified

Dragon of the Week:

The Flagon with the Dragon has the pellets with the poison. --Danny Kaye (The Court Jester)

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Make barbecue sauce. Make an excellent barbecue sauce by mixing Coca-Cola with Heinz Ketchup. Brush the mixture on chicken or ribs while grilling. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola.html ~~I'm from Kansas City, home of great BBQ, and I think this sounds terrible.

All those jokes about dragons eating spicy food are so wrong. Dragons are so hot they don't notice. You measure peppers in Scovilles; you measure dragons in Kelvins. § A dragon would never explode but a dino might. § These dragon jokes are so old they were the first thing ever to be discovered by a paleontologist.

...........Just who loves who more than who.........Ethel Merman & Fernando Lamas …..Mutual Admiration Society (Happy Hunting)

4) Superman's earth name is Clark Joseph Kent.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Just heard someone say, “It's never a good sign when folk music starts getting good again. --Father Nathan Monk

Pre Quote of the Week: I will not carry a gun...I’ll carry your books, I’ll carry a torch, I’ll carry a tune, I’ll carry on, carry over, carry forward, Cary Grant, cash and carry, carry me back to Old Virginia, I’ll even hari-kari if you show me how, but I will not carry a gun! --Hawkeye (M*A*S*H)

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: MarsCon 2026 (15-18, Virginia Beach, VA) So much to see and so... https://marscon.org/

Sick Joke of the Week: During a nuclear explosion there is a certain distance of the radius where all of the supermarket frozen pizza will be cooked to perfection. --Rick's Friend Jake

Spark of Joy of the Week: No, you can't have Greenland; you haven't even finished your Venezuela yet. --Submitted by gr of oh

Darius Dragon ate a paladin once. He said it tasted lawful. § Donna Dragon trains every day to dance in the Talon Show. § Those of you with green dragons, please wait until it ripens. § Dragons didn't last as long as dinosaurs because they smoked.

..........And keep up each other's morales.........Ethel Merman & Arthur Treacher …..Let's Be Buddies

5) The newspaper strips ran continuously until May 1966 and were syndicated by the McClure Syndicate. At its peak, the strip had an estimated readership of over 20 million people.

Protest Sign of the Week: Wake Up And Smell The Fascism

Better Protest Sign of the Week: In Case Of ICE Apply Heat

Quote of the Week: Very early in my life it was too late. --Marguerite Duras

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm sorry I'm late. The troll that blocks my driveway had harder riddles than usual today. --Submitted by Feral Spiritualists

Today's Peace of History: January 16, 1992: The government of El Salvador and rebel leaders signed a pact in Mexico City ending 12 years of civil war that had killed at least 75,000 people.

Dwarves have an old saying: The early beard gets the wyrm. § Never make a dragon angry; they don't call them earthquakes for nothing. § One of the major differences between dragons and pieces of paper is that you can't make a paper airplane out of a dragon. § What was the dragon doing on the highway? About 30 mph.

..........What you got? Hey, what you're doin'.........Ethel Merman …..Something For The Boys (Something For The Boys)

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, January 16, 2026: Falkor's ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: The only thought in the world that is worth anything is free thought. To free thought we owe all past progress and all hope for the future. Since when has any one made it appear that shackled thought could get on better than that which is free? Brains are a great misfortune if one is never to use them. --Richard Savage.

Cost of War:

As of 01/15/26 State Department Costs: $284,549,700,991

As of 01/08/26 State Department Costs: $283,989,129,547

As of 01/15/26 Homeland Security: $1,220,786,857,468

As of 01/08/26 Homeland Security: $1,220,177,897,700

As of 01/15/26 Interest on War Debt: $1,353,880,648,371

As of 01/08/26 Interest on War Debt: $1,352,314,797,214

As of 01/15/26 Military Costs: $3,187,631,857,429

As of 01/08/26 Military Costs: $3,186,442,854,218

As of 01/15/26 Veterans Care: $4,688,024,639,270

As of 01/08/26 Veterans Care: $4,676,154,123,058

As of 01/15/26 Total Cost of Wars: $10,734,876,695,374

As of 01/08/26 Total Cost of Wars: $10,719,081,458,925

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

We also know what it means to see our children begin to smile again with a restoration of hope and faith in the future. --Ellen Johnson Sirleaf

Famous Last Words: ...loved me with an everlasting love. --Arturo Toscanini died 1/16/57

..........I'm gonna raise the roof.........Ethel Merman …..Before The Parade Passes By (Hello Dolly)

Dragons continue to be wrinkly because everyone is afraid to iron them. § The difference between St George and Rudolph is that George slays a dragon and Rudolph drags a sleigh. § I'm reading a book about a short ballerina. It's called The Girl with the Draggin Tutu.

May Peace warm your heart

And Joy cool your brain

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

Projected ePistle

Famous First Words: One is not born, but rather becomes a woman. --Simone de Beauvoir The Second Sex

Ah, January, the month of the new year, new starts, new everything. The city of Lawrence has many new projects. There's improved roads and new shopping areas and steam shovels and mud and pavement. Everyday I pass by it and think, I probably should have buried those bodies someplace else. [] I got T-boned by a construction delivery truck the other day. It was a literal ton of bricks.

Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. --President Dwight D Eisenhower

..........He'll go a-roving plundering no more.........Joan Baez …..Lowlands

Violence is black children going to school for 12 years and receiving 6 years worth of education. --Julian Bond

It is a chilly (33°F) Friday morning. The sky is a clear blue without even a hint of clouds. The sun is rising over rooftops and trees making clear the shapes and colors of deep blue houses and brown, bare branches. Even the robin's breast picks up the light and shines it forward. The robin makes no sound but from a distance a crow calls to its murder. Both Puck and Veronica have been out. Now Puck sleeps and snores on his pillow and Veronica silently prowls the house watching me pour a cup of coffee and doctor it up...silently watching me type at my desk. My coffee is sinful delight; it brings a smile to my mouth and a sigh of satisfaction to my soul. And now it's time to write to you. What a wonderful day this is shaping up to be.

Hope your weekend is free of foreign kidnappers, dear readers. ~~Sorry, I'm trying to think positively about being suddenly insinuated into an international criminal organization in the midst of committing a crime with our money and no accountability.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Earth received a cease and desist order from the universe for excessive drama. --Submitted by Club42

The 6 Phases of a New Project: 1) Enthusiasm 2) Disillusionment 3) Panic 4) Search for the guilty 5) Punishment of the innocent 6) Praise and honors for the non-participants [] To the Optimist, the glass is half full. To the Pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the Project Manager, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

All war is a symptom of man's failure as a thinking animal. --John Steinbeck

..........How the winds are laughing.........Joan Baez …..Donna Donna

Trivia Questions: January is National Conscience Month.

1. What is the mission of National Conscience Month?

2. How can we begin educating our conscience?

3. How do we expand our perspective?

4. What are steps we can take to develop empathy?

5. From where might the conscience arise?

Big Hello: sà-wàr-dee – Thai https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: At three days old, 2026 was still young enough for Donald Trump to fu*k it. Witches Against Maga

Image of the Week: Scrabble Shoes

~~Someone should write a song. “bouncing letters and numbers with every step...the ole scrabble shoes”

Let's face it, if I had 8 weeks to do this project, I'd still start 2 days before the deadline. [] That new hospital construction project has this gross looking vehicle. They call it the Icky Bod Crane.

Poverty, privation and want are the school of the good soldier. --Napoleon Bonaparte

..........Oh, look now Joseph, I have cherries by command.........Joan Baez …..Cherry Tree Carol

Moonbeam: If a thing is worth doing, it is worth doing slowly...very slowly. --Gypsy Rose Lee

Blasphemy of the Week: What do you call a system that leaves people one paycheck away from being #homeless? Christian Nationalism. But, as a consolation, you do get eternal life. --Submitted by MMS

Coffee Joke of the Week: This coffee is so strong it's brew-tally honest.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Shark Week used to be a pagan holiday until Constantine rewrote history at the Council of Nicea in 325 AD. --Submitted by Wittenburg Door

Craft stores should issue tickets to patrons who begin a new quilting project before finishing the last one. [] The first 90% of a new project takes 90% of the time. The remaining 10% of the project takes the other 90% of the time.

I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation. War is hell. --General William Techumseh Sherman

..........Watch them jugs a-fillin' in the pale moonlight.........Joan Baez …..Copper Kettle

1) National Conscience Month is observed annually by the American Meditation Institute to encourage people to use their conscience as a guide for better decisions, promoting personal wisdom, peace, and creativity.

Almanac: It is Friday, January 9, 2026. The moon enters its third quarter tomorrow (1/10) and is in Libra. Today is Play God Day, Balloon Ascension Day, Law Enforcement Appreciation Day, National Cassoulet Day, and National Static Electricity Day. And because it is the second Friday it is also National Hockey Mom Day.

Among those born on this day were Johann Weichmann (1620), Thomas Warton (1728), William Jackson (1815), Lizette Reese (1856), Joseph B. Strauss (1870), Simone de Beauvoir (1908), Dr. Hepcat (1913), Gypsy Rose Lee (1914), Les Paul (1915), Judith Krantz (1928), Algis Budrys (1931), Bob Denver 91935), Joan Baez (1941), Jimmy Page (1944), and William Cowsill (1948).

On January ninth the first women's golf tournament was held (1811), NYC's Astor Library opened (1854), Fisk University was established (1866), Wind Cave National Park was established (1903), the US invaded Honduras (1912), the first helicopter (autogiro) was flown (1923), and construction of the Aswan Dam began (1960).

Night Sky, 1/9: Jupiter is incredibly bright; it's near the Gemini twins. Saturn is low in the southwest after sunset. The beehive cluster will be visible in the night sky throughout January! The beehive cluster, more formally known as Messier 44, or M44, is made of at least 1,000 stars. It's an open star cluster, meaning it's a loosely-bound group of stars.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Robin Hood and Legolas

Extra Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: This morning I coughed up a pawn, a knight, and a bishop. I must have a chess infection. --Home Groan Puns

This Week: Saturday, January 10 – Houseplant Appreciation Day & National Cut Your Energy Costs Day & National Save The Eagles Day

Night Sky, 10/10: Jupiter will be at its most brilliant of the year.

Sunday, January 11 – Learn Your Name In Morse Code Day & National Human Trafficking Awareness Day & National Sunday Supper Day

Night Sky, 10/11: Since the moon is waning, Orion, Taurus, Gemini, and the dazzling Sirius are all visible.

Monday, January 12 – National Clean Off Your Desk Day & National Hot Tea Day & Plough Monday

Tuesday, January 13 -Korean American Day & National Poetry At Work Day & PRB Day

Night Sky, 1/13: Sunrise: 7:38 am Sunset: 5:20 pm (9 hr & 42 minutes of daylight) Moonrise: 10:52 am Moonset: 9:15 pm

Wednesday, January 14 – International Kite Day & Organize Your Home Day & World Logic Day

Thursday, January 15 – Humanitarian Day & National Hat Day & Thank Your Mentor Day

Night Sky, 1/15: It is near the new moon which means the sky is dark. This is an excellent time for viewing faint objects like galaxies. You need a telescope, minimal light pollution and a star map.

Do you know what they call an engineer without a degree? Project Manager [] Any project can be accurately estimated once it's complete.

War is, by its definition, an inhumane act. --President Ulysses S Grant

..........What will your mother think, pretty Peggy-o.........Joan Baez …..Fennario

2) Ground judgments in facts. Learn relevant facts before moralizing. Use simple fact-checking.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Misery might love company but so does joy. And joy throws much better parties. https://www.facebook.com/TheHippiePeaceFreaks

Moonbeam: I never stop being amazed by all the different ways of playing the guitar and making it deliver a message. --Les Paul

Fun Fact of the Week: Play God Day is a day to perform simple acts of kindness, like offering blessings or help to others, rather than miracles, to make someone's day better.

Video of the Week: Gypsy Rose Lee: Put the Blame on Mame (1:30) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=479616561524084

There is a thin line between politics and theatricals. --Julian Bond

It is well that war is so terrible, otherwise we would grow too fond of it. --General Robert E Lee

My boss just told me she was assigning me to a new project. I was excited. Then she said, “It started a month ago”. [] Just when you finish idiot-proofing your project, the company hires a new, improved idiot.

..........And the choirs kept singing Freedom.........Joan Baez …..Birmingham Sunday

3) We can expand our perspective by exposure. Read diverse voices (literature, journalism, biographies) and by seeking dialogue with people who hold different views. (Per last week's ePistle – share a meal.)

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Nothing is more dangerous than a shallow thinker with a deep vocabulary. --Nassim Nicholas Taleb

Weird Word of the Week: Solivagant: rambling alone : marked by solitary wandering https://www.merriam-webster.com/wordplay/beautiful-useless-obscure-words

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Clean milk stains from clothes. Saturate the milk stains with a can of Coca-Cola, let the garment sit for five minutes, and then launder in your regular wash. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola.html

The soldier above all others prays for peace, for it is the soldier who must suffer and bear the deepest wounds and scars of war. --General Douglas MacArthur

A badly planned project will take three times longer than expected. A well planned project will take twice as long. [] I set out to learn cooking in the new year. I began with beef stew. But my parsley, basil, and rosemary all turned against me. Thyme is on my side though.

...........it's a still life watercolor of a now late afternoon.........Joan Baez …..The Dangling Conversation

4) Develop empathy in disciplined ways. Use perspective-taking or combine empathy with tempering. Emotional responses inform but do not override factual assessment.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: An injury sustained in a pillow fight is known as a concushion. --Andrey Bratus

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: OrcaCon 2026 (9-11, Seattle, WA) ...a cozy inclusive tabletop games convention. https://www.orcacon.org/

Static Electricity Appreciation Video of the Week: A video of the student whose hair stands on end. (:20) https://www.youtube.com/shorts/sqKhxQkMotg

Spark of Joy of the Week: At Scrabble on Monday a discussion arose about kidnapping leaders of foreign countries. (Nobody wanted to kidnap poor Charles III.) It started with a cartoon: A map of southern Florida with a circle around Mar-a-lago. There was an arrow from Cuba to Florida with a note 325 miles. I think it would be so righteous somehow for Cuba to kidnap the Don. The idea of him trying to talk the Cubans into giving him land for a hotel in Havana, priceless. The conversation spread out...the medieval king's ransom...kidnapping actual kids...and arrived at a wife swapping scenario: we kidnap all the leaders of the world and each country picks a flag out of a hat...

Overgrown military establishments are under any form of government inauspicious to liberty, and are to be regarded as particularly hostile to republican liberty. --President George Washington

Our new project manager thinks that nine women can make a baby in one month. [] Elon Musk's 2026 project is to build giant sunglasses for the Earth. The planet will be so cool, it will solve global warming.

..........Una poca de gracia.........Joan Baez …..La Bamba (One little bit of grace)

5) While some religious perspectives argue conscience requires a spiritual soul, atheists typically attribute it to complex, unconscious computations in the brain, emergent properties of intelligence, or innate human social behaviors, though the exact mechanism of subjective consciousness remains a scientific puzzle.

Protest Sign of the Week: Less Fascism More Cowbell

Quote of the Week: Dear Future Generations, please accept our apologies, we were rolling drunk on petroleum. --Kurt Vonnegut

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: What I love about cats is thow they collectively, as a species, have never once been fed. --Submitted by UUHS

Today's Peace of History: , January 9, 1967: Julian Bond, elected more than a year before, was finally sworn in as a member of the Georgia House of Representatives. The legislature had refused to allow him to take his seat because of his opposition to the Vietnam War and specifically his endorsement of a Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee (SNCC) statement accusing the United States of violating international law in Vietnam. Bond had been the director of SNCC.

War is a racket. --General Smedley D Butler

True story: my org is discussing the new name for our next project... Our current project "Servicing 2" is finishing soon. There is discussion around naming the next version, and "Servicing X" came from a "trendy" exec. I mentioned a good abbreviation would be "ServX". I'm waiting for either a commendation or a write-up. [] My daughter came home with her high school art project the other day. It was a painting she titled "Raining Cheerios". I asked why she would do a painting of cheerios falling from the sky. She said: "Because I'm a cerealist"

..........I became a slave to the wind.........Joan Baez …..Tumbleweed

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, January 9, 2026: Projected ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: You know, I have no worst experiences. --Bob Denver

Cost of War:

As of 01/08/26 State Department Costs: $283,989,129,547

As of 01/01/26 State Department Costs: $283,431,727,533

As of 01/08/26 Homeland Security: $1,220,177,897,700

As of 01/01/26 Homeland Security: $1,219,572,461,971

As of 01/08/26 Interest on War Debt: $ 1,352,314,797,214

As of 01/01/26 Interest on War Debt: $1,350,757,968,320

As of 01/08/26 Military Costs: $3,186,442,854,218

As of 01/01/26 Military Costs: $3,185,260,814,791

As of 01/08/26 Veterans Care: $4,676,154,123,058

As of 01/01/26 Veterans Care: $4,664,354,201,478

As of 01/08/26 Total Cost of Wars: $10,719,081,458,923

As of 01/01/26 Total Cost of Wars: $10,703,380,813,758

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The war in Iraq has as much to do with terrorism as the administration has to do with compassion. --Julian Bond

Famous Last Words: I've already paid. --Joan Baez Diamonds & Rust...legend has it being about her and Dylan.

..........Hearts starve as well as bodies.........Joan Baez & Mimi Farina …..Bread And Roses

Any soldier worth his salt should be antiwar. --Norman Schwarzkopf

On time, on budget, on spec – pick 2. [] Remember, if you can't convince them, confuse them.

May Peace be your resource

And Joy be your inspiration

prairie mama

christine

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