Sneaky ePistle

Famous First Words: And now for something completely different... Monty Python

It is International Ninja Day. My ninja disguise is fat-old-lady. Î If you cross a hippie and a ninja you get peace and quiet.

Be a warrior when it comes to delivering on your ambitions. And a saint when it comes to treating people with respect, modeling generosity, and showing up with outright love. --Robin S Sharma

..........Please allow me to introduce myself.........Rolling Stones …..Sympathy For The Devil

There is a power in public opinion in this country – and I thank God for it: for it is the most honest and best of all powers – which will not tolerate an incompetent or unworthy man to hold in his weak or wicked hands the lives and fortunes of his fellow-citizens. --Martin Van Buren

It is a bright, cold (37°F) Friday morning. The sky is smeared with white clouds, or perhaps they are decaying jet trails. There is a southerly wind that reminds one that it is a cold morning. But birds and other wildlife are out and about checking the peanut bowl and eating a few sunflower seeds. Calls of the crow and the blue jay are heard; but a softer background of bird chirps can be heard also. Patches of snow scatter the yard where the grass is still very green. I am indoors eating a blueberry turnover and sniffing the jasmine incense. The doctor told me I was doing okay and should come back in 3 months and I am delighted to be part of life today.

Hope your weekend is full of delightful surprises, ePistle-ninjas

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The problem with the gene pool is that there's no lifeguard. --Submitted by INRITH

I'm on a strict Ninja Diet. I eat in stealth mode. Î If you mess up at ninja-church the nun chucks you out.

Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need. --Khalil Gibran

..........But never in this sweet short life have I felt like this before.........Rolling Stones …..No Expectations

Trivia Questions: The Venus I probe began orbiting Venus in 1978. What have we learned?

1. How long is a day on Venus?

2. How long is a year on Venus?

3. What is the mean temperature on Venus?

4. In which direction does Venus spin: clockwise or counterclockwise?

5. Why is it named after the goddess Venus?

Big Hello: Isänme - Tatar https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Today I ate all the remaining Halloween candy while reheating my Thanksgiving leftovers and listening to Christmas music. I have reached the trifecta of holiday Nirvana. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Image of the Week: Crow with Peanuts ~~The other crow flew away or it would have been Attempted Murder With Peanuts.

I didn't understand Michelangelo's jokes but the rest of the turtles thought it was shell-arious. Î Ninja turtles make terrible co-workers. They're always destroying the Shredder.

Make space in your life for the things that matter, for family and friends, love and generosity, fun and joy. Without this, you will burn out in mid-career and wonder where your life went. --Jonathan Sacks

..........There's a pain where there once was a heart.........Rolling Stones …..Dear Doctor

Moonbeam: Love shall be our token; love be yours and love be mine. --Christina Rossetti

Blasphemy of the Week: Jesus Heals Demon-Possessed Man By Taking Away His Smartphone. --Submitted by Wittenburg Door

Coffee Joke of the Week: Birds get their morning coffee at NestCafe.

Distant Cousin of Blasphemy of the Week: I don't have an advent calendar so I'm just opening cupboard doors and eating whatever's in there. --Submitted by MMS

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I run like the winded. --Submitted by Club42

Homeoffice Ninja: A master of looking busy in an online meeting while secretly watching cat videos. Î A ninja with red hair is called a ginja.

Those values that I think relate to gumbo diplomacy are generosity, hospitality, its kindness...all of that. --Linda Thomas-Greenfield

..........I'll break big in New Orleans.........Rolling Stones …..Parachute Woman

1) It takes Venus longer to rotate once on its axis than to complete one orbit around the sun. It takes 243 Earth days to make one Venus day. It's the longest day in the solar system.

Almanac: It is Friday, December 5, 25. The moon was full (Cold) yesterday (12/4) and is in Gemini. The United Nations has declared this International Volunteer Day for Economic & Social Development and World Soil Day (FAO). Today is AFL-CIO Day, Bathtub Party Day, Columbian International Day of the Reef, International Ninja Day, Krampusnacht, National Repeal Day, and Sachertorte Day. Because it is the first Friday in December it is also Bartender Appreciation Day, Faux Fur Friday, and National Salesperson Day.

Among those born on this day were Scarlotti (1666), Germiniani (1687), Martin Van Buren (1782), Christina Rossetti (1830), George Custer (1839), John Bridge (1844), Fritz Lang (1890), Sonny Boy Williamson (1899), Otto Preminger (1905), Abraham Polonsky (1910), Carl "Kansas" Fields (1915), Simone Gallimard (1817), Little Richard (1932), Joan Didion (1934), Calvin Trillin (1935), Andy Kim (1946), Jim Messina (1947), and Margaret Cho (1968).

On December fifth Euridice by Caccini premiered (1602), Christie's held their first auction (1766), Phi Beta Kappa became the US's first scholastic fraternity (1776), Washington was re-elected (1798), Jefferson was re-elected (1804), Requiem by Berlioz prmiered (1837), the first electric car went 15 miles between charges (1893), the first football uniforms with numerals were worn (UofPA, 1908), Einstein was granted a US visa (1932), the first commercial hydroponics plant opened (1935), the National Council of Negro Women formed (1935), Angel Street premiered (1941), the Committee on Civil Rights was created by Executive Order (1946), Dragnet premiered (1951), the Matchmaker premiered (1956), Beggar's Banquet by the Rolling Stones was released (1968), the final episode of Monty Python's Flying Circus aired (1974), OJ rushed for 203 yards (1976), and Venus I began orbiting Venus (1978).

Night Sky, 12/5: Iapetus, a moon of Saturn reaches superior conjunction with Saturn. Observers will see the 11th-magnitude moon south of the planet. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Art Appreciation in Downtown Seattle ~~The statue is Ivar Feeding The Gulls. ~~This may be apocryphal but I have heard Ivar had a "no one should ever go hungry" mantra after his mother was starved to death by a celebrity "diet specialist", which led him to open Ivar's clam chowder on the waterfront, and he would hand out leftover food every day - even to the seagulls. --ay of wa

This Week: Saturday, December 6 – Bike Shop Day & Mitten Tree Day & International Day to End Femicide

Sunday, December 7 – International Civil Aviation day & Pearl Harbor Day & National Slime Day

Night Sky, 12/7: Jupiter can be seen in conjunction with the moon. And the Puppid-Velids meteor shower is active from December 1 to December 15, 2025, with its peak activity around December 7. This minor shower is best viewed from the Southern Hemisphere, where it can produce up to 10 meteors per hour.

Monday, December 8 – Green Monday & National Day Of Lard & Toilet Paper Appreciation Day

Tuesday, December 9 – International Anti-Corruption Day & World Techno Day & Weary Willie Day

Wednesday, December 10 – Dewey Decimal Day & International Animal Rights Day & Jane Addams Day & Nobel Prize Day

Night Sky, 12/10: Sunrise: 7:30 am Sunset: 4:59 pm Moonrise: 11:31 pm (12/10) Moonset: 12:28 pm The moon reaches its last quarter.

Thursday, December 11 – Kaleidoscope Day & National Stretching Day & UNICEF Birthday

A lot of ninja jokes have the same punchline. Favorite drink: Fruit Punch Make a ninja laugh: Punchline. Î How many ninjas does it take...hey, where did that light bulb come from?

True generosity is too frequently eaten up by prosperity and riches. --Ellen G White

..........But when it comes to the nitty-gritty.........Rolling Stones …..Jigsaw Puzzle

2) A year on Venus is equal to 225 earth days.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Starting sentences in the lower case is a protest against capitalism. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Moonbeam: To make an omelette, you need not only those broken eggs but someone “oppressed” to beat them: every revolutionist is presumed to understand that, and also every woman, which either does or does not make 51 percent of the population of the United States a potentially revolutionary class. --Joan Didion

Fun Fact of the Week: The Krampus (German: [ˈkʁampʊs]) is a horned anthropomorphic figure who, in the Central and Eastern Alpine folkloric tradition, is said to accompany Saint Nicholas on visits to children during the night of 5 December (Krampusnacht; "Krampus Night"), immediately before the Feast of St. Nicholas on 6 December. In this tradition, Saint Nicholas rewards well-behaved children with small gifts, while Krampus punishes badly behaved ones with birch rods.

Audio of the Week: Sonny Boy Williamson Bring It On Home https://youtu.be/eQCBdGXsJnA

The government should not be guided by Temporary Excitement, but by Sober Second Thought. --Martin Van Buren

It takes generosity to discover the whole through others. If you realize you are only a violin, you can open yourself up to the world by playing your role in the concert. --Jacques Yves Cousteau

When I went to Japan on vacation, I didn't see a single ninja. Impressive. Î Nancy Ninja was so paranoid she couldn't trust anyone. She always had a sneaking suspicion.

..........Hey, think the time is right for a palace revolution.........Rolling Stones …..Street Fighting Man

3) The mean temperature on Venus is 462°C / 863°F. This is because of the high concentration of carbon dioxide in the atmosphere, which works to produce an intense greenhouse effect. Heat is trapped in the atmosphere like a blanket. This makes Venus hotter than Mercury.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If women are bad at parking, it's only because we are constantly lied to about what 8 inches is. --Submitted by RHOZ

Weird Word of the Week: Testerical: /tes*ter*iu*cal/ adjective The male for hysterical. Loud. Dramatic. Wrong. --Denielle Burdick

Dragons of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Extend the life of freshly cut flowers. Add one-quarter teaspoon (twenty drops) of Clorox bleach to each quart of water used in your vase. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox4.html

Too many have dispensed with generosity in order to practice charity. --Albert Camus

I've decided to become a ninja. I took the first step and bought some sneakers. Î Surprise parties for ninjas are called mass funerals.

...........Took all he had and started down the road.........Rolling Stones …..Prodigal Son

4) Almost all planets in the Solar System spin anti-clockwise on their axis and orbit the sun in an anti-clockwise direction. Venus also orbits the Sun anti-clockwise but spins clockwise on its axis.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Don't Make The Same Mistakes Twice...Say no to reincarnation. --Reformed Buddhists --Submitted by Philosophy Matters

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Cajun Con (8-7. Gonzales, LA) A Gumbo of Pop Culture https://www.cajunconla.com/

Mystery of the Week: Has anyone ever found out what the knights in white sat in?

Spark of Joy of the Week: Woody Guthrie singing “Old Man Trump” a song about the president's father and his struggle to disobey NYC's fair housing laws. https://woodyguthrie.org/Lyrics/Old_Man_Trump.htm ~~See Peace of History below

Every minute of every hour of every day you are making the world, just as you are making yourself, and you might as well do it with generosity and kindness and style. --Rebecca Solnit

At Christmas Neil Ninja becomes the Ninjabread man. Î My cat just started studying ninja ways. She tried to sneak up on me but accidentally knocked over the lamp.

..........If she's so wild, then she can join in too.........Rolling Stones …..Stray Cat Blues

5) It is thought that Venus was named after the beautiful Roman goddess (Greek Aphrodite) due to its bright, shining appearance in the sky. Of the 5 planets known to ancient astronomers, Venus would have been the brightest.

Protest Sign of the Week: Give Me Ribberty Or Give me Death (Picture of a cute frog)

Better Protest Sign of the Week: Looking 4 Dr Who Accepts Concepts-Of-A-Plan Health Insurance

Best Protest Sign of the Week: Seize The “Beans” Of Production (Starbucks Strike Picket Line)

Quote of the Week: We are all visitors to this time, this place. We are just passing through. Our purpose here is to observe, to learn, to grow, to love and then we return home. --Australian Aboriginal Proverb

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It is unfair that Greedy McGolfy* gets to sleep through his presidency and we don't. --Andy Borowitz *One of Jimmy Kimmel's 78 Hilarious Nicknames

Today's Peace of History: December 5, 1957: New York became the first city to legislate against racial or religious discrimination in housing (Fair Housing Practices Law).

The opposite of corporate greed is personal generosity. Government policies that enable the former and prevent the latter are both worthy of protest. --Cynthia Dill

Typed “ninja” into a thesaurus. It said: ninjas cannot be found”. Well played, ninjas, well played. Î My WiFi is faster than a ninja on Red Bull.

..........We get buses everywhere.........Rolling Stones …..Factory Girl

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, December 5, 2025: Sneaky ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: The newest victims of the nation's foreclosure crisis are pets, which is extremely distressing to me. --Margaret Cho

Cost of War:

As of 12/04/25 State Department Costs: $281,200,637,877

As of 11/27/25 State Department Costs: $280,656,067,730

As of 12/04/25 Homeland Security: $1,217,149,032,217

As of 11/27/25 Homeland Security: $1,216,557,630,841

As of 12/04/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,344,526,225,376

As of 11/27/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,343,005,455,857

As of 12/04/25 Military Costs: $3,180,529,289,840

As of 11/27/25 Military Costs: $3,179,374,234,424

As of 12/04/25 Veterans Care: $4,617,114,895,992

As of 11/27/25 Veterans Care: $4,605,586,484,229

As of 11/27/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,625,185,351,746

As of 12/04/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,640,522,362,781

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

In a government whose distinguishing characteristic should be a diffusion and equalization of its benefits and burdens, the advantages to the individual will be augmented at the expense of the community at large. --Martin Van Buren

Famous Last Words: There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry. --General George Armstrong Custer

..........Spare a thought for the stay-at-home voter.........Rolling Stones …..Salt Of The Earth

Generosity has built America. When we fail to invest in children, we have to pay the cost. --Bob Keeshan

So, I went to a ninja parade. It was a complete rip off. I didn't see a damned thing, but I kept finding candy in my pockets. Î Ninjas deal with fear by giving it to others.

May Peace shield your heart

And Joy protect your soul

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

Deadly ePistle

Famous First Words: Tyger, Tyger burning bright... William Blake The Tyger

My sister took her dog through a training course. As she told me about it, I turned to her terrier and said “Play dead”. And little Fido whipped out a guitar and started singing, “Riding that train, high...” Ϟ Bob came to interview for a job as senior product manager. But he had a gap in his resume from 1966 to 1995; he claimed he was on tour with the Grateful Dead.

..........Come with me where moonbeams paint the sky.........Randy Newman …..My Little Buttercup

Some laws of the state aimed at curbing crime are even more criminal. --Friedrich Engels

It is a cold (28°F) and gray Friday morning. The sky is colorless with only a light wind to swish the willow branches slowly. But a bright red cardinal is walking the perimeter of the shed roof making sure no cat is hiding in the dead grass before swooping down on the sunflower seeds. And the chirps I hear come from unseen blue jays. The cute little squirrels never make sounds. Somewhere nearby are quacking sounds but no duck has ever visited my patio. The cat and the dog have already been out. Puck is sleeping on his number 2 pillow and Veronica has disappeared into the house somewhere. Both are sleeping off feast day (pork roast, gourmet mac and cheese and asparagus. With pie and cheesecake too. And delightful company. Now, I get to write to you. Another thing for me to be thankful for.

Hope your weekend makes you happy to be alive, ePistleheads.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My mother said, “Thanksgiving is over, stop with the pumpkin jokes.” So I went cold turkey.

Our tribute band, The Grapeful Red, has been fired as the official band for the local soccer team. They said that 47 minute half-times weren't working. Ϟ I can't believe he asked me who Jerry Garcia is. I unfriended him.

..........Flew 'cross the country back to Buffalo.........Randy Newman …..Red Bandana

Trivia Questions: Happy Flossing Day!

1. What percentage of total cleaning does flossing account for?

2. How long should your string of floss be for the best clean?

3. Floss comes in many flavors to encourage use. What is your favorite flavor?

4. What are the two main types of floss?

5. How much dental floss was sold in the US in 2023?

Big Hello: vanakkam – Tamil {Ancient Dravidian language spoken in India} https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you don't get why soft and slow is harder to play than loud and fast, then it's probably safe to say you need to work on your kissing as well. --The 13^th Chair

Image of the Week: Veronica and her new tv

Advise of the Week: Cutting your tennis balls in half allows you to store 2 more balls in each can.

I can remember every word Jerry sang at my first Dead concert. But I can't remember why I came into the kitchen. Ϟ How many Grateful Dead fans does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just let it burn out and follow it around for a few decades.

..........Sleep all day, dance all night..........Randy Newman …..That's The Life

Moonbeam: If we have not quiet in our minds, outward comfort will do no more for us than a golden slipper on a gouty foot. --John Bunyan

Blasphemy of the Week: It's a good day to be reminded that God's pronouns are They/Them. --Submitted by MMS

Coffee Joke of the Week: You know if you keep drinking the same kind of coffee day after day you'll get deja-brew.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The Affordable Care Act is 15 years old, which explains why Republicans want to f*ck it.

The next song is a 25 minute improvisational instrumental. Feel free to sing along if you're high enough, Ϟ After two hours of Dead music, my friends said “put on something else” so I dug out some classic JGB (Jerry Garcia's Band)

..........Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong.........Randy Newman …..Feels Like Home

1) Brushing alone cleans only about 70% of your teeth, and dental floss is what's needed to clean out those hard to reach spaces between teeth.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 28, 2025. The moon reaches its first quarter today and is in Pisces. Today is Black Friday, Buy Nothing Day, Flossing Day, Maize Day, National Day of Listening, National Field Hockey Days, National Native American Heritage Day, Random Acts of Kindness Friday, Sinkie Day aka Dine Over Your Kitchen Sink Day aka Sink Day, Red Planet Day, and You're Welcomegiving Day.

Among those born on this day were John Bunyan (1628), Jean-Baptiste Lully (1632), William Blake (1757), Friedrich Engels (1820), Anton Rubinstein (1829), Brooks Atkinson (1894), Claude Levi-Strauss (1908), Berry Gordy, Jr. (1929), Hope Lange (1931), Gary Hart (1926), Randy Newman (1943), Alexander Godunov (1949), Paul Shaffer (1949), Ed Harris (1950), and Judd Nelson (1959).

On November twenty-eighth Olympia established as capital of the Washington Territory (1853), the first skywriting exhibition spelled out "Hello..." (1922), Adm Richard E. Byrd made the first South Pole flight (1929), FDR, Churchill and Stalin met at Tehran (1943), Hopalong Cassidy premiered on TV (1948), Chad gained independence (1958), Mauritania gained independence (1960), and Mariner 4 flew by Mars (1964).

Night Sky, 11/18: First Quarter Moon occurs this morning at 12:59 am CST. At this phase, the Moon is not visible in the morning, but rises in the afternoon and remains in the sky all evening, setting around local midnight. Saturn comes to a stationary point in our sky tonight at 8 pm in the constellation Aquarius. The ringed planet will be some 40° high in the south, shining at magnitude 0.9. You can’t miss it, as it’s the brightest point of light in this region of the sky, hanging below the Circlet asterism of Pisces the Fish. https://www.astronomy.com/the-sky-this-week/the-sky-this-week-from-november-21-to-28-2025/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Drink One and Drink Two

This Week: Saturday, November 29 – International Day of Solidarity With the Palestinian People & Square Dancing Day & International Jaguar Day

Sunday, November 30 – Artist's Sunday & Cities For Life Day & Native Women's Equal Pay Day

Night Sky, 11/30: Today, the planet Mars reaches apogee. Apogee is the furthest point in a planet’s orbit from the Sun. Mars will next return to perigee – its closest point to the Sun – in February 2027.

Monday, December 1 – Antarctica Day & Basketball Day & Rosa Parks Day & World Aids Day

Tuesday, December 2 – Giving Tuesday & National Mutt Day & Special Education Day & World Trick Shot Day

Night Sky, 12/2: Saturn is nearly halfway from the south-southeast horizon to overhead. It gently moves eastward in front of Pisces’ dim stars. Now and for the next few hours, Saturn is in a prime location for telescopic inspection, even in this moonlight.

Wednesday, December 3 – Be A Blessing Day & International Baboon Day

Thursday, December 4 – International Cheetah Day & National Cookie Day & National Sock Day

Night Sky, 12/4: Before sunrise, Mercury nears its largest separation from the sun, known as greatest elongation, in a few mornings. The planet seems to hug the sun, appearing low in the sky during morning twilight.

..........Keep on listening for that quiet voice.........Randy Newman …..Heaven Is My Home

2) To get a good grasp on your floss, you'll need about 18-20 inches of string to comfortably wrap around your fingers and pull through your teeth.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Welcome to The Afterlife, input enlightenment code. What? Code not recognized. Code recovery? Sure Reincarnation initiating.

Moonbeam: Drop the last year into the silent limbo of the past. Let it go, for it was imperfect, and thank God that it can go. --Brooks Atkinson

Fun Fact of the Week: The 2025 National Day of Listening is on Friday, November 28, 2025. It is an unofficial day to encourage people to listen to and record the stories of friends, family, and community members, often observed the day after Thanksgiving as an alternative to Black Friday. The event was launched by the oral history project StoryCorps in 2008.

Video of the Week: Hopalong Cassady opening sequence (:23) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oje2utECNsY

From the first day to this, sheer greed was the driving spirit of civilization. --Friedrich Engels

When the doctor listened to my heart she claimed that the last time she heard a beat like that was at a Grateful Dead concert, Ϟ You can always tell if deadheads have been staying with you, because they're still there.

..........There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you.........Randy Newman …..You Got A Friend In Me

3) Most often purchased floss flavor is mint. Cinnamon, bacon, watermelon, coconut, and banana daiquiri are also available. In fact if you google floss and a flavor, you can find a great many flavored flosses. ~~For instance, I found apple, grape, and bubble gum, but didn't find beer.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My favorite thing about humans may be our ability to drench potatoes in mayonnaise and call it a salad with a straight face. --Submitted by INRITH

Weird Word of the Week: Gardyloo – a warning cry https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/gardyloo

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Disinfect planters. Mix three-quarters of a cup of Clorox Bleach per gallon of water in a bucket and use this solution to disinfect recycled plastic and clay pots, planters, and seed-starter-trays. Let soak for an hour, then rinse and dry. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox3.html

My 8 year old assumed that The Grateful Dead was a band for ghosts. Ϟ Your know how deadheads swirl their arms around when they dance , it's to keep the music out of their eyes.

...........It's our turn to sit in the comfy chairs.........Randy Newman …..Putin

4) There are two kinds of floss: monofilament and multifilament. Monofilament is made of a combination of plastics and rubber, while multifilament uses a composition of nylon and silk.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Whether you're offended by me saying “Happy Holidays” or “Merry Christmas”, take comfort in knowing I don't really mean either. --Submitted by MMS

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Starbase Indy 2025 (28-30, Indianapolis, IN) Celebrating Star Trek's vision of the future through humanitarianism and STEM education. https://www.starbaseindy.org/

Spark of Joy of the Week: “Advoiding politics” at Thanksgiving is how we got [The Orange Orge]. Put on juggalo war paint and politicize everything. Redistribute the bread rolls. Nationalize the Monopoly game. Unionize the flag football league. Incite a kids' table uprising... --Zeddy --Submitted by TPWJS

I can't help thinking that this would be a better world if everyone would listen to The Grateful Dead. --Lucy Van Pelt Ϟ Sherry and her friends avoided buying tickets to Dead concerts by parachuting into the middle of the venue. They called themselves Acid Rain.

..........There's rivers and forests and mountains high.........Randy Newman …..Relax, Enjoy Yourself

5) In 2023 the US dental floss market sold approximately $557.68 million worth. No number of rolls was specified for 2023, but 2019 estimated 42 million rolls were sold annually.

Protest Sign of the Week: You Can't Legislate Us Out Of Existence

Quote of the Week: Evil cannot permanently organize. Eventually, it will turn on itself. --Bernice A King

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I tried to join a dating site, but the only one that would have me was Carbon Dating.

Today's Peace of History: , November 28, 1991: The U.S. Congress passed the Comprehensive Threat Reduction Act (the Nunn-Lugar legislation), which provided up to $400 million to assist with the destruction of Soviet nuclear and chemical warheads. The legislation was initiated by Senator Sam Nunn (D-Georgia) and Senator Richard Lugar (R-Indiana).

In music news: The Grateful Dead is putting out an 80 disc live set. No word yet on which song it will be. Ϟ What does a deadhead say when he runs out of weed? “What is this crappy music?”

..........Your better run for daylight.........Randy Newman …..Better Off Dead

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, November 28, 2025: Deadly ePistle0. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: The wise man doesn't give the right answers, he poses the right questions. --Claude Levi-Strauss

Cost of War:

As of 11/27/25 State Department Costs: $280,656,067,730

As of 11/21/25 State Department Costs: $280,096,083,208

As of 11/27/25 Homeland Security: $1,216,557,630,841

As of 11/21/25 Homeland Security: $1,215,949,237,415

As of 11/27/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,343,005,455,857

As of 11/21/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,341,440,008,223

As of 11/27/25 Military Costs: $3,179,374,234,424

As of 11/21/25 Military Costs: $3,178,186,753,179

As of 11/27/25 Veterans Care: $4,605,586,484,229

As of 11/21/25 Veterans Care: $4,593,726,094,367

As of 11/27/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,625,185,351,746

As of 11/21/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,609,401,387,481

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Freedom is the recognition of necessity. --Friedrich Engels

Famous Last Words: The merry, unspoilt fascination of laughing lovers... Enid Blyton who died 11/28/1968

..........This ain't the way to have fun.........Randy Newman …..Mama Told Me Not To Come

Well, we're here with Bob Weir where the band is playing their last show...again. Ϟ Two deadheads were discussing a recent show. “It was terrible, the mix was bad, Jerry forgot lines, the playing was uninspired, it was torture to listen to.” said the first. The second added, “I agree, and it was too short, too.”

May Peace encompass you

And Joy hold you close

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

Danke, ePistle

Famous First Words: I, Franklin D. Roosevelt, President of the United States of America, do hereby designate and set aside Thursday, the twentieth day of November, 1941, as a day to be observed in giving thanks to the Heavenly Source of our earthly blessings.

If anyone has no family or friends and will be eating Thanksgiving dinner alone, let me know. I need to borrow your chairs. [] What's blue and covered in feathers? cold turkey

Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow. --Melody Beattie

..........You're a pal and a confidant.........Andrew Gold …..Thank You For Being A Friend

The planter, the farmer, the mechanic, and the laborer...form the great body of the people of the United States, they are the bone and sinew of the country...who love liberty and desire nothing but equal rights and equal laws. --Andrew Jackson

It is a rainy Friday morning. There is a steady drip, drip, drip from the roof to the puddle below. And a steady plop, plop, plop of drips on the roof. Staccato Day Break. No bird song, no thunder or lightning; it's just a gentle rain, a much needed rain, a rain to make my newly planted milkweed seeds grow. And it is finally light enough to see the wind (11 mph from the northeast) blowing the still green willow branches into a frenzy. Wet enough to give Puck a wet dog scent. Gentle enough to soothe someone back to sleep if they weren't sitting up right at their computer. The world is washing itself into winter. And I sit in my warm room sipping coffee and muttering “we need this”. Wherever you are, whatever the weather, have a good one.

Here's hoping your weekend and your life gives you lots to be thankful for, thanksgivers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: We're hearing Uncle Scam may not pardon the Thanksgiving Turkey at the White House this year because the turkey is having trouble raising the two million dollar pardons fee. --The Iron Snowflake

Thanksgiving, when the Indians said, “Well, this has been fun, but we know you have a long voyage back to England”. --Jay Leno [] Thanksgiving: bringing out the best in family dysfunction since 1963.

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it. --William Arthur Ward

..........for every breath, for every day of living.........Don Henley …..My Thanksgiving

Trivia Questions: Thanks for the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade

1. When did the first Macy's parade happen?

2. How long was the route of the original Macy's Christmas Parade?

3. How long will the route of 2025 Macy's Parade be?

4. When was the parade first televised nationwide?

5. Guess how many people attended the 2024 parade in person.

Big Hello: Ahul - Tamasheq (A Berber language spoken across North Africa) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm ~~Special thanks to this website on World Hello Day!!

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm from Canada, so correct me if I'm wrong but...Isn't the American Thanksgiving a celebration of when the Europeans MIGRATED ILLEGALLY to the United States? --Submitted by LaughingInDisbelief

Image of the Week: This is the letter D. It appeared on the roof of my shed last Friday morning. By Saturday it had migrated towards the roof edge facing my window. On Sunday morning it was on the patio. It is plastic and obviously from some child's toy set. I believe it is a thank you gift from the crows who enjoy my peanuts from time to time and sing to me is a genre with which I am unfamiliar. I tied a string around it and hung it on the doorknob next to the patio.

Advice of the Week: Use your dishwasher to steam the vegetables by sealing them in a mason jar with water and seasonings before running a load of dishes. This is a high-tech (and potentially questionable) approach to multitasking.

I ran out of thyme and didn't get the turkey seasoned. [] Thanksgiving Day, man – not a good day to be my pants. --Kevin James

Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul –Henry Ward Beecher

..........I was building something.........Taylor Swift …..thanK you alMee

Moonbeam: A man has to be Joe McCarthy to be called ruthless. All a woman has to do is put you on hold. --Marlo Thomas

Blasphemy of the Week: Evangelicals promote the concept of “original sin”, the idea that everyone is born with a sinful nature. Marginal Mennonites believe in “original goodness”, that a spark of the divine resides in every human being. (John 1:9) --Submitted by MMS ~~See also “Famous Last Words” below.

Coffee Joke of the Week: I like my coffee how I like my jokes – Pun-cutual. https://www.facebook.com/maythecoffeebewithyou

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Red Mitten Day sells mittens to support Canadian Olympic athletes. Canada & the US are holding Olympic trials for curling. You know, you sweep, therefore you win. How do you stop Canadian bacon from curling in the frying pan? You take away their little brooms.

Dear God, I'm writing about some concerns I have as a turkey. It seems that in Your infinite wisdom you decided to make us fat, flightless, and evidently delicious. Did we say something to make You mad? [] Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in 12 minutes. Half-times take 12 minutes. This is not a coincidence. --Erma Bombeck

“Thank you” is the best prayer that anyone could say. I say that one a lot. Thank you expresses extreme gratitude, humility, and understanding. --Alice Walker

..........Oh, we thank you for giving us peace in the midst of a storm.........New Edition …..Thank You

1) Macy's presented the first New York Christmas Parade in 1924. It featured floats, bands, and zoo animals. An estimated 10,000 people looked on. FYI: 2025 is the 99^th parade because there were no parades in 1942, 1943, and 1944 due to the war.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 21, 2025. The moon was new yesterday (11/20) and is in Sagittarius. Today is Alascattalo Day, National Red Mitten Day, Substitute Educators Day, World Hello Day, and World Television Day.

Among those born on this day were John Bale (1495), Voltaire (1694), William Beaumont (1785), Arthur Quiller-Couch (1863), Jim Bishop (1907), Stan Musial (1920), Vivian Blaine (1921), Jean Shepard (1933), Marlo Thomas (1927), and Goldie Hawn (1945).

On November twenty-first the first balloon flight took off (1783), Andrew Jackson was admitted to the bar (1787), the cigar lighter was patented (1871), Red Grange played his final game for University of Illinois and signed with the Chicago Bears (1925), the first bi-colored stamp was introduced (1952), Jack Benny on violin and Richard Nixon on piano played a duet (1959) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ArB8_CQX-U}, and the Concorde made its first flight (London to NY, 1977).

Night Sky, 11/21: d-Monocerotid Meteor shower: https://in-the-sky.org/news.php?id=20251121_10_100#google_vignette Mars and the moon are in conjunction and Earth and Uranus are in opposition.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Above the trampoline

This Week: Saturday, November 22 – Family Volunteer Day & Humane Society Day

Sunday, November 23 – Dr Who Day & Fibonacci Day & Mother Goose Day & Stir Up Sunday

Night Sky, 11/23: The bowl of the Little Dipper slowly swings down in the evening at this time of year, left or lower left of Polaris, which holds steady due north. Most of the Little Dipper is dim. The exceptions are Polaris (its handle-end) and Kochab (the lip of its bowl). Both are 2nd magnitude. Around 10 or 11 pm, depending on your longitude within your time zone, Kochab passes exactly below Polaris. They're 16° apart, about a fist and a half. https://skyandtelescope.org/astronomy-news/observing-news/this-weeks-sky-at-a-glance-november-14-23/

Monday, November 24 – Fairy Bread Day & Celebrate Your Unique Talent Day

Tuesday, November 25 – International Hat Day & International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women Day

Night Sky, 11/25: Sunrise: 7:11 am Sunset 5:03 pm Moonrise: 4:39 am Moonset: 3:25 pm

Wednesday, November 26 – National Jukebox Day & National Mike Day & World Olive Tree Day

Thursday, November 27 - Thanksgiving

Night Sky, 11/27: Saturn ends retrograde.

My grandmother made the best sweet potatoes. She called it a yam session. [] Thanksgiving is America's national chow-down feast, the one occasion each year when gluttony becomes a patriotic duty. --Michael Dresser

Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world --John Milton

..........And every little piece of sweetness............Kris Kristofferson …..Thank You For A Life

2) The 1924 parade started at 145^th Street and continued for 6 miles.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If Eve doomed the entire human race over an apple, what would she have done for a Klondike Bar? --Never Trust A Smiling Cat

Alascattalo Day: Dedicated to Akaskan humor: Captain Chirikov had trouble navigating the waters between Russia and Alaska; he just couldn't get his bearings straight. /\ The Texan knew she was in trouble when the Alaskan police officer asked her where she was on the night of November 14th to February 12th? /\ Alaska doesn't exist. It was all an aleutian.

Moonbeam: I put all my intelligence, such as it is, into playing dumb blondes. --Vivian Blaine

Fun Fact of the Week: World Hello Day is a secular holiday, observed annually, to express that conflicts should be resolved through communication rather than the use of force. Participants verbally greet ten people or more on that day as an expression of the importance of personal communication in preserving peace. The annual global event began to be celebrated in 1973 as a response to the Yom Kippur War. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Hello_Day

Video of the Week: Goldie Hawn explains tax deductions (:37) https://www.tiktok.com/@clown_jewels/video/7358191924072713515

Take time to deliberate; but when the time for action arrives, stop thinking and go in. --Andrew Jackson

Giving is an expression of gratitude for our blessings. --Laura Arrillaga-Andreessen

To make Thanksgiving s'mores, use Pil-grahams. [] I suppose I will die never knowing what pumpkin pie tastes like when you have room for it. --Robert Brault

..........Oh, Oh, you've been good to me............The Beatles …..Thank You Girl

3) This year the parade will run from Central Park West to Columbus Circle, onto Central Park South and south on 6^th Avenue ending at 7^th in front of Macy. This is a 2.5 mile route.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: A violin has four strings and a short neck. A fiddle has four strings and a red neck. --Adam Lee Marcus

More Advice of the Week: Ensure a happy family get-together this Thanksgiving: Stuff the turkey with cannabis.

Weird Word of the Week: Snerdle {v} To wrap up snugly beneath the blanket (and ignore the world a little longer) 18^th century dialect. https://www.facebook.com/woodlarking

Dragon of the Week:

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Clean pesticides and insects from fruits and vegetables. Add one-half cup of Clorox Bleach in a sink filled with enough water to cover the fruits and vegetables. Let soak for ten minutes, and rinse clean. The chlorine bleach kills lingering bugs. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/clorox3.html

Fill the earth with your songs of gratitude. --Charles Spurgeon

My daughter, the baseball star, helped with Thanksgiving dinner. She was the first to

baste. [] If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at turkeys. There's turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Someone needs to tell the turkey, “Man, just be yourself”. --Mitch Hedberg

...........I rejoice to the skies.........Big Star …..Thank You Friends

4) The first national network TV broadcast of the Macy's Parade was in 1948.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Americans Agree: Epstein is evil, but at least he didn't host The Apprentice. --Submitted by TPWJS

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Chicago TARDIS 2025 (28-30, Chicago area) Named by
The Guardian as one of “the best conventions for US Whovians” https://www.chicagotardis.com/

Thanksgiving FYI of the Week: Safe For Dogs: Sweet potatoes, turkey meat, green beans, apples (no seeds), pumpkin, carrots, and celery. Unsafe For Dogs: Mashed potatoes, stuffing, gravy, turkey bones or skin, casseroles, onions, and garlic. --Submitted by RHOZ

Spark of Joy of the Week: Book Store Clerk: We've moved a few things around. Travel books are in the Fantasy section, politics is in Sci-Fi, and epidemiology is in Self-Help. Good Luck!

When we focus on our gratitude, the tide of disappointment goes out and the tide of love rushes in. --Kristin Armstrong

The official Dance of Thanksgiving is the Turkey Trot. [] For those of you who cannot be with family this Thanksgiving, please resist the urge to brag. --Andy Borowitz

..........For every opportunity..........MarvinSapp …..I Thank You For It All

5) It is estimated that 3 million people watched the 2024 parade in person.

Protest Sign of the Week: The Tree Of Life Is Dying...Prune the top 1% and Feed The Roots

Quote of the Week: The colors most strongly associated with thankfulness are 1: pink (especially dark pink), which represents healt-felt appreciation, grace, and elegance. 2: Yellow which symbolizes joyful thanks and happiness. Other colors like orange, red, and brown are linked to the season of Thanksgiving and its themes of harvest and abundance. --Google AI ~~Seriously, I edited it. The words are almost verbatim but the punctuation was confusing. ~~~~There were people saying blue is the color of thanks but they didn't make a very good case for it. The words were calming, and inspirational – not gratitude.

Seasonal Suggestion of the Week: Moms, hear me out...if you purge your kids toys now instead of after Christmas, we can fill thrift stores with toys for moms looking for an affordable Christmas. --Submitted by Feral Spiritualists

Final Funniest Thing I Didn't Read of the Week: I use Apache's Open Office as my word processor. It is very “helpful” like Veronica my cat is “helpful” when I'm trying to make my bed. I can type tha and it will suggest thanksgiving. But in all the times that I have written gratitude in this ePistle, OO has never once suggested it for me. After gra it suggests grandmother and then gives up when I type the t. I think OO must have an ungrateful algorithm.

Today's Peace of History: November 21, 1981: More than 350,000 demonstrated in Amsterdam against U.S. nuclear-armed cruise missiles on European soil.

As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them. --John F Kennedy

What do you call a rude turkey? Jerky [] Thanksgiving is so called because we are all so thankful that it only comes once a year. --R J O'Rouke

..........But you did, but you did..........Sam & Dave …..I Thank You

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, November 21, 2025: Danke Pistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: You know, there's endorphins in laughter, as there are endorphins in running in the park. --Marlo Thomas

Cost of War:

As of 11/20/25 State Department Costs: $280,096,083,208

As of 11/13/25 State Department Costs: $279,557,889,553

As of 11/20/25 Homeland Security: $1,215,949,237,415

As of 11/13/25 Homeland Security: $1,215,353,812,751

As of 11/20/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,341,440,008,223

As of 11/13/25 Interest on War Debt: $1,339,909,903,088

As of 11/20/25 Military Costs: $3,178,186,753,179

As of 11/13/25 Military Costs: $3,177,024,239,250

As of 11/20/25 Veterans Care: $4,593,726,094,367

As of 11/13/25 Veterans Care: $4,582,120,852,877

As of 11/20/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,609,401,387,481

As of 11/13/25 Total Cost of Wars: $10,593,958,283,468

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

I have always been afraid of banks. --Andrew Jackson

Famous Last Words: Alexa! Say grace.

..........The thank you's never end..........Cocomelon …..Thank You Song

Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone. --Gertrude Stein

When are turkeys the most grateful? The day after Thanksgiving. [] I come from a family that believes gravy is a beverage. --Erma Bombeck

Be thankful for the Peace in you life

And for the Joy even more

prairie mama

christine

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