Billowing ePistle

Famous First Words: Professor Tigwissel becoming alarmed... From Professor Tigwissel's Burglar Alarm --the first newspaper cartoon strip 9/11/1875 New York Daily Graphic

Reading This ePistle will not solve your problems, but neither will cleaning your oven.

It's Cloud Appreciation Day! Oh, no, the little cloud just ran away to join the Cirrus. ^@@ I used to own a small plane that I used to fly around for fun. But I had to get rid of it. All those damned computer clouds were tearing it up.

..........Dropping rain from on high.........Jean Warren …..When I See Clouds In The Sky (tune: My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean)

I think the first duty of society is justice. --Alexander Hamilton

It is a foggy Friday morning. It has been a long time since we've had fog and a while since we've had a temperature of 65°F. An aging Puck declined to go out it in (perhaps he's been watching too many horror movies) and instead peed in the kitchen in front of me while I was fixing his breakfast. Sigh! The wildlife on the back patio, however, is delighted with cooler weather and with nearly soggy sunflower seeds. The sky is hidden above the fog. There is no wind and only the thinnest ends of willow branches are moving at all. I do not hear birdsong. The colors are muted by humidity giving an impressionist quality to the view from the window. I appreciate the coolness, and the beauty as I sip my coffee and listen to Puck sighing under my desk. And now I get to write to you. Another big sigh!

Hope your weekend floats like a cloud, most patient readers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The last time this country experienced this level of civil unrest, the music was a whole lot better. Weaponization of Ignorance

Storm clouds wear thnderwear under their raincoats. ^@@ Does heaven have to supply IT people since they invented cloud storage for computers. --St Peter

..........And I started to dream..........The Rollings Stones …..Get Off Of My Cloud

Trivia Questions: On this day in 1919 the US invaded Honduras.

1. What was the war called? Hint: Not Tropical Storm.

2. What was the US's excuse for invading Honduras?

3. What did the US do?

4. What was the result?

5. What do you know about the Banana Wars?

Big Hello: Mwngz ni – Yongbei Zhuang (China) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I got a job at Comcast and completed training so I could fix my own cable because it was faster than being on hold with customer service. --Submitted by Writers, Readers and General Tomfoolery

Philosophy Punch Line of the Week: Heidegger, Girard, Nietzsche. Like so many others in tech, I draw inspiration from completely misunderstanding those authors. --Submitted by Philosophy Matters

Whatever This Is of the Week: At this point MAGA is just Stockholm Syndrome for people who don't know where Stockholm is. --sashasrbulj --Submitted by gr of oh

When clouds are sick do they feel, “over the weather”? ^@@ Clara cloud broke up with her boyfriend because he kept bragging that he was made up of Linux servers.

..........It's clouds' illusions I recall.........Joni Mitchell …..Both Sides Now

Humans are the measures of all things. --Protagoras

Moonbeam: The true adventurer goes forth aimless and uncalculating to meet and greet unknown fate. --O Henry

Blasphemy of the Week: The patron saint of copying someone on email is St Francis of a cc. --Submitted by Blasphemy Memes

Extra Blasphemy of the Week: Town Priest: The witches that control the woods are evil. Girl: What do they doi? Town Priest: They aren't heteronormative or patriarchal, do lots of drugs, and have sex with each other. Girl: OMG what specific parts of the woods are they in, so I can avoid them extra hard? --Submitted by MMS

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you're wondering how bad things REALLY are: Clorox announced a recall because some of their cleaning products are contaminated with highly infectious bacteria...--Submitted by 98%

There was once a cloud that became queen. She rained for thirty years. ^@@ The CIA keeps sending drones with microphones into the clouds above the antifa offices.

..........But I'll fly a little higher..........Rob Sobiech …..Clouds

Humans are featherless bipeds. --Plato

1) The military intervention occurred during the First Honduran Civil War which was called the Revolution of '19. This war was in turn part of a broader conflict known as the Banana Wars.

Almanac: It is the 254^th day of the year, Friday, September 11. The moon is new today and is in Virgo. Today is Hug Your Boss Day, Libraries Remember Day, National Dog Walker Appreciation Day, and Remember Freedom Day. Because it is the second Friday it is Cloud Appreciation Day.

Among those born on this day were O Henry (1862), D H Lawrence (1885), Bear Bryant (1913), Ferdinand Marcos (1917), Tom Landry (1924), Earl Holliman (1928), Brian DePalma (1940), Paul Riser (1943), Leo Kottke (1945), Amy Madigan (1950), and Harry Connick Jr (1967).

On September eleventh, Alexander Hamilton was appointed Secretary of the Treasurer (1789). Jenny Lind gave her first US concert (1850). The first newspaper cartoon strip was published (1875). The Bronx Gas & Electric Company opened (1893). The US invaded Honduras (1919). Britain took over the rule of Palestine (1922). Boulder Dam (now known as Hoover Dam) was dedicated (1936).

Night Sky, 9/11: The moon is new today at 3:26 am. That's 0% illumination.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Back to School: One bought a grown up hat.

One dyed his hair purple.

This Week: Saturday, September 12 - National Day of Encouragement & National Hug and High Five Day & Prairie Day

Sunday, August 13 – Bald Is Beautiful Day & Kids Take Over The Kitchen Day & Scooby-Doo Day

Night Sky, 9/13: Mars & Jupiter rise in the east in the morning. Saturn shines all through the night.

Monday, August 14 – Live Creative Day & National Boss/Employee Exchange Day & National Sober Day

Tuesday, August 15 – Greenpeace Day & National Voter Registration Day & National Day of the Cowgirl

Night Sky, 9/15: Cygnus the Swan and Lyra the lyre aka the eagle are the dominant constellations in September.

Wednesday, August 16 – National Tattoo Story Day & Stay Away From Seattle Day & Trail of Tears Commemoration Day

Thursday, August 17 – Citizenship Day & Constitution Day & Time's Up Day

Night Sky, 9/17: Sunrise: 6:58 AM Sunset: 7:37 pm 12 hours and 56 minutes of daylight. Moonrise: 7:30 am Moonset: 7:45 pm.

I was gonna tell a cloud joke, but it evaporated. ^@@ I linked my new phone to the cloud, now all I get is mist calls.

..........Head high up in the clouds..........Miley Cyrus …..Midnight Sky

Humans are rational animals. --Aristotle

2) Francisco Bertrand, president of Honduras, attempted to block open presidential succession prompting revolt. Oh, no! Possible regional instability.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Men should think twice before making widowhood women's only path to power. --Gloria Steinem

Moonbeam: Inject a few raisins of conversation into the tasteless dough of existence. --O Henry

Fun Facts of the Week: Today is the anniversary of one of a major name change, damn. In 1930 the newly opened dam was completed and named Hoover after the sitting president, Herbert Hoover. 1933: After Hoover lost the election to FDR, the Secretary of the Interior, Harold Ickes, began calling it Boulder Dam which had been the working title of the project. 1947: Harry Truman signed the legislative act returning Hoover's name to the dam.

Video of the Week: Amy Madigan: He Made A Woman Out Of Me (with Ry Cooder on guitar) from the movie Crossroads. (4:14)

The sacred rights of mankind are not to be rummaged for among old parchments or musty records, They are written, as with a sunbeam, in the whole volume of human nature, by the hand of the divinity itself; and can never be erased or obscured by mortal power. --Alexander Hamilton

On their days off, tornado clouds play tournament Twister. ^@@ The reason it took so long for computers to develop cloud storage was that the Giant -one that Jack climbed the beanstalk and killed- ran the cloud storage business as a monopoly.

..........Take less shape and disappear.........Lousine …..Just A Cloud

Humans are f*cking stupid. --Nietzsche

3) To protect US corporate interests (Cuyamel Fruit and Standard Fruit), the US intervened diplomatically and militarily in Honduras, warning that intervention would ensue. ~~Cuyamel Fruit was bought out by United Fruit in 1929. Standard Fruit is now part of Dole but I didn't get a date.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If someone from ziplock could contact literally anyone in the cereal business, that would be great! https://www.facebook.com/groups/226096020786795/

Weird Word of the Week: Callipygian – having beautifully shaped buttocks. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/callipygian

Dragon of the Week: Ninereeds (Draco Nobilis) and Twoflower --Terry Pratchet's The Colour of Magic ~~That may be Rinsewind behind Twoflower, I'm not sure.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Bake a moist ham. Empty a can of Coca-Cola into the baking pan, wrap the ham in aluminum foil, and bake. Thirty minutes before the ham is finished, remove the foil, allowing the drippings to mix with the coke for a sumptuous brown gravy. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola3.html

Do you figure clouds look down on us and think, “Wow, that one is shaped like a dumbass”? @@ When they told Elon to put his computer files in the cloud, he bought a rocketship.

...........For these ghosts that I chase..........Panic At The Disco …..King Of The Clouds

4) President Bertrand resigned. US troops landed to “protect American lives” even though it was implied that if he resigned they would not invade. The diplomats helped install an interim government (apparently not the one that was actually elected in first place).

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Keith Richards and Willie Nelson outliving Dolly Parton and Richard Simmons really has me questioning everything D.A.R.E. taught me.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Rose City Comic Con (11-13, Portland, OR) Get Your Geek On... https://rosecitycomiccon.com/

Ego Alert of the Week: Why is it that I get this little ego boost, a tiny spark of joy, when I've shared a meme before some hotshot group posts it? Am I suddenly the center of some tiny universe.? I shared it, I didn't create it. Nietzsche was right.

Spark of Joy of the Week: 3 Wishes: 1) I want the wisdom of Athena. 2) I want the strength of an Amazon. 3) I want the audacity of a mediocre Republican man. --rvc of mo

Since her brother said rain was made by clouds' runny noses, my 7 year old refuses to go outside when it rains even with a raincoat, hat, and umbrella. ^@@ Damn, that's no cloud it's just somebody's computer.

..........You may not see the silver linin'...........Brad Paisley …..Behind The Clouds

5) The Banana Wars were a series of US military interventions, occupations, and police actions in Central America from 1898 to 1934.The main goal was to protect American commercial and economic interest in Latin American Designed to protect United Fruit and Standard Fruit. ~~This just sounds horribly like NOT HISTORY.

Protest Sign of the Week: GOD IS LOVE

Second Protest Sign of the Week: Believe Your Eyes Not Their Lies

Quote of the Week: The underlying purpose of AI is to allow wealth to access skill while removing from the skilled the ability to access wealth. --unknown

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you're not up to crushing it today, try just crinkling it.

Today's Peace of History: September 11, 1906: Mohandas Gandhi, a young Indian lawyer, began a nonviolent resistance campaign in Johannesburg, South Africa, demanding rights and respect for those of Asian descent. It was the birth of his concept of political progress through nonviolent resistance known as Satyagraha, or truth-force.

Clouds are fluffy, not fat. Clouds can get skinny just by crying. Can you? ^@@ The reason it took so long to develop IT cloud stoarge was the time it took for enough software and hardware engineers to die and make it to heaven.

..........oh-oh-oh-oh..........One Direction ….Clouds

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, September 11, 2026: Billowing ePistle . Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Californians are a race of people; they are not merely inhabitants of a State. --O Henry

Cost of War:

Pentagon Spending 9/10/26: $962,112,225,540

Pentagon Spending 9/3/26: $942,699,874,972

That's nineteen billion, four hundred and twelve million, three hundred and fifty thousand, five hundred and sixty-eight dollars this week. That could double the annual amount of federal K-12 elementary education grants for schools in low income districts.

Without justice, and love, peace will always be the great illusion. --Helder Camara

Pentagon Spending in August 2026: $89,089,647,361

Pentagon Spending in July 2026: $85,053,017,282

Pentagon Spending in June 2026: $82,621,957,422

Pentagon Spending in May 2026: $87,601,145,719

Pentagon Spending in April 2026: $81,264,897,194

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

In politics, as in religion, it is equally absurd to aim at making proselytes by fire and sword. Heresies in either can rarely be cured by persecution. --Alexander Hamilton

Famous Last Words: ...a little droopingly, but with a hopeful heart. --D H Lawrence Lady Chatterly's Lover

..........I'm doing...(fine).........The Temptations …..Cloud Nine

Fog is just a cloud giving you a hug. ^@@ Rainbows are really just prisms sucking data out of cloud storage.

May you be showered by Peace

And flooded by Joy

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

Twined ePistle

Famous First Words: I am honoured to inform you myself that I just signed my abdication... Queen Wilhelmina of the Netherlands 1948 Abdication Speech

September is National DNA, Geonomics & Stem Cell Education Month. Let's celebrate! I just got my DNA test results. I'm 40% from France, 50% from Great Britain, and 10% from a plastics factory in Texas. °° The entire Biology Department wears designer genes.

..........Look at Mother Nature on the run.........Dolly Parton, Emmylou Harris & Linda Ronstadt …..After The Gold Rush

Men simply copied the realities of their hearts when they built prisons. --Richard Wright

It is a quiet Friday morning. The sky is still white waiting for the sun to breach the treeline and color it blue. It is also still cool (75°F) and the humidity is hovering below 80% with a light wind (c. 4 mph from the southeast); it gives the morning a freshness and a chance to breathe before the sun begins to bake the summer out of the land. There is no wildlife at the sunflower seed pile nor bird song in the air. A quiet morning except for Puck's panting in his sleep. Ah, a distant dog barks to let me know that the rest of the world is still out there doing morning things and enjoying the cool while it lasts. I take a sip of doctored coffee and sit down to write to you. Pretty good day so far.

Hope your weekend is less twisted than your DNA, little gene bundles.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: On the upside, all this bad shit could lead to a resurgence in the Blues. https://www.facebook.com/kusala.bhikshu

Got my snowman's DNA test back: 85% water, 8% dirt and 7% dog pee. °° Official Definition DNA: As you can see from the model, the structure is basically a long...twisty...uh, rope-laddery-type...thingy.

..........One more look will get the bed unmade.........Dolly Parton & Julianne Hough …..Baby Blues

Trivia Questions: It's National Food Bank Day.

1. What's the difference between a Food Bank and a Food Pantry?

2. Where do food banks get their food?

3. How is the food stored and transported?

4. How many Food Bank networks are there in the US?

5. How many US citizens are served by food banks and, therefore, food pantries?

Big Hello: Mogethin – Yapese (Micronesia) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Rules to learning English: 1. their our know rules

Image of the Week: @wolfpack11720.bsky.social "The word Fascism has, now, no meaning except insofar as it signifies 'something not desirable'." --George Orwell

Blasphemy I of the Week: Book Spine: God's Word, Final, Infallible And Forever Revised Edition. by Floyd C McElveem @freethinkersunite.bsky.social

My frog got his DNA test back. He's part Scottish, part Irish, and a tad Pole. °° My self image problems are genetic. I just heard one of the links on my helix asked another link if these genes made her look fat.

..........and we will always stand by you.........Dolly Parton & Porter Wagoner …..Christina

Moonbeam: Forests precede civilizations and deserts follow them. --François-René de Chateaubriand

Blasphemy II of the Week: If Jesus were around today someone would do a DNA test.

Coffee Joke of the Week: One cup for waking up. One cup for being nice. One cup just in case. https://www.facebook.com/groups/funnycoffeequotes/posts/1394717924396452/

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Secretary of Health Kennedy has written a book; I think it's called How to Avoid Vaccines and Die Like a Medieval Peasant.

The baby's DNA test came back: 80% water and 20% milk. °° Scientists recently combined the DNA of a cheetah and a crab. Things went sideways real fast.

..........Sewing every piece with love.........Dolly Parton …..Coat Of Many Colors

1) Food banks are large, central warehouses that supply the hunger relief network. A Food Pantry is a community service where families go for food. The “network” may also include shelters, after school spaces, etc.

Almanac: It is Friday, September 4, 2026. The moon enters its last quarter today and is in Gemini. Today is National Spice Blend Day, National Wildlife Day, and Newspaper Carrier Day. Because this is the first Friday of September it is also Bring Your Manners To Work Day, National Chianti Day, National Food Bank Day, Stand Up To Cancer Day, and National Lazy Mom's Day. And because it is the Friday Before Labor Day it is National College Colors Day. (KU's are crimson and blue, in case you didn't know.)

Among those born on this day were François-René, de Chateaubriand (1768), Richard Wright (1908), Paul Harvey (1918), Dick York (1928), Mitzi Gaynor (1931), Sonny Charles (1940), Gene Parsons (1944), Gary Duncan (1946), Tom Watson (1949), Damon Wayans (1960), John DiMaggio (1968), Natalie Diaz (1978), Poo Bear (1979), Beyoncé (1981), and Nyota Uhura (2179).

On September fourth Los Angeles was founded (1781). There were bread riots in Mobile, AL (1864). Hawaii got its first daily newspaper (1866). The first cafeteria opened (NYC, 1885). Eastman patented both the film and the "Kodak" (1888). Doris Kopsky became the first NABA female cycling champion (1937). Queen Wilhelmina of The Netherlands abdicated (1948). The first transcontinental TV broadcast aired (Pres Truman, 1951). The Edsel was introduced (1957). NASA launched the first Orbital Geophysical Observatory (OGO-1, 1964).

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Hiking to the campsite with mom.

Night Sky, 9/4: September is a prime month to view the Milky Way. Tonight is the last night of the Aurigid Meteor Shower.

This Week: Saturday, September 5 – Be Late For Something Day & International Bacon Day & Jury Rights Day

Sunday, September 6 – Bowling League Day & National Pastor's Spouses Day & Pet Rock Day

Night Sky, 9/6: Cassiopeia and the Great Square of Pegasus dominate the night sky.

Monday, September 7 – Labor Day

Tuesday, September 8 – Dog Walker Appreciation Day & International Literacy Day & National Ampersand & Day

Night Sky, 9/8: Jupiter, Saturn, and Mars are visible in the early morning and Venus can be seen in the evening sky

Wednesday, September 9 – National Teddy Bear Day & Wonderful Weirdos Day

Thursday, September 10 – Swap Ideas Day & (World) Suicide Prevention Day & National School Picture Day

Night Sky, 9/10: Sunrise: 6:52 am Sunset 7:48 pm 12 hours and 55 minutes of daylight Moonset: 3:16 pm. ...note the moon does not rise again until 12:17 am tomorrow

Once I took a DNA test. It was pretty hard but I think I passed. °° The geneticist used to send out cards to couples who found out they were pregnant. The card said: Congratulations on successfully combining your DNA.

..........Life took me on a different twist.........Dolly Parton …..Gettin' Happy

2) Food banks receive donations from farmers, grocery stores, wholesalers, manufacturers, and individual supporters. Partnerships that help prevent food waste while feeding those in need. A major resource is food rescue; the process of capturing safe, high-quality food that might otherwise be discarded due to labeling errors, short shelf life, etc.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Every time you make a typo the errorists win. --Submitted by LanguageNerds

Moonbeam: Trust your anger. It is a demand for love. --Natalie Diaz Postcolonial Love Poem

Observation of the Week: On the other hand, the examined life doesn't seem to produce much income. --Edward Sorel --Submitted by UUHS

Video of the Week: President Truman on the first transcontinental television airing. (:45)

Don't leave inferences to be drawn when evidence can be presented. --Richard Wright

To study for your DNA test, try highlighting with a genetic marker. °° DNA without Helix is just a flat joke.

..........Bittersweet memories.........Dolly Parton …..I Will Always Love You

3) Modern food banks have large climate-controlled warehouses where food is sorted and stored until it is needed. Sorting is a labor intensive task and local volunteers often help with that. Distribution is to local churches, shelters, neighborhood pantries, and nonprofits. Food banks provide the infrastructure, while community partners bring compassion and knowledge of the region.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: My 8-year-old asked if I've ever experienced hallucinations, which is an odd question considering I don't have any 8-year-olds. --Steve Acree --Submitted by jm or ks

Weird Word of the Week: Deipnosophist – a person skilled in table talk. https://www.dictionary.com/browse/deipnosophist

Dragon of the Week: Boris aka My Father's Dragon

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Strip paint off metal patio furniture. Cover the painted surface for one week with a bath towel saturated with Coca-Cola. Add more Coke daily to keep the towel drenched. The paint strips off effortlessly. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola3.html

A Home DNA test kit does not make a good baby shower gift. °° My DNA test results confirm it...I'm probably human.

...........I'm beggin' of you, please don't take my man.........Dolly Parton …..Jolene

4) One network, Feeding America, consists of between 200-250 member food banks. There are also dozens of independent and regional food related banks.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Contrary to popular belief, pigs don't actually speak pig Latin. They speak Porkuguese. --Submitted by cn of

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Dragon Con 2026 (3-5, Atlanta, GA) Dragon Con is the largest multi-media, popular culture convention focusing on science fiction & fantasy... https://www.dragoncon.org/

Whatever This Is of the Week: Lego Kit: Kansas University Campanile bell tower. Details

Spark of Joy of the Week: To the people who lose one shoe on the side of the highway, please tell me what the rest of your life is like. https://www.facebook.com/theherdhub

New DNA tests have revealed that Orville and Wilbur's parents were actually Chinese. So I guess that means two Wongs do make a Wright. °° I made a DNA joke in my biology class but no one laughed...guess my thymine was off.

..........I woke up this mornin' with a smile on my face.........Dolly Parton …..Last Night's Lovin'

5) Roughly 49 to 53 million people in the US rely on food pantries and food banks.

Protest Sign of the Week: LOVE LIKE DOLLY

Quote of the Week: The real problem of humanity is the following: we have paleolithic emotions, medieval institutions, and god-like technology. --Edward O Wilson

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Major in philosophy: Ask people WHY they would like fries with that burger. https://www.facebook.com/authormontgomery

Today's Peace of History: September 4, 1978: Simultaneous demonstrations in Moscow’s Red Square and in front of the White House in Washington, D.C. were organized by the War Resisters League, calling for nuclear disarmament.

After 10 years, a mother realizes her child doesn't look like anyone in the family and gets a DNA test done. Surprise, it's not her child! She tells the husband, who calmly replies, "What, you don't remember?" The wife shakes her head worriedly, hoping her husband's answer will fill in the gap. He says to her: "When we were leaving the hospital, the baby pooped in the diaper. You told me to change it, so I went back inside, grabbed a clean baby, and left the dirty one there." °° DNA thinks it's funny to ask RNA “Are you still single” every time she sees him.

..........I might be crazy, but I ain't dumb.........Dolly Parton & Porter Wagoner …..Run That By Me One More Time

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, September 4, 2026: Twined ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Golf is a game of ego, but it is also a game of integrity: the most important thing is you do what is right when no one is looking. --Tom Watson

Cost of War:

Pentagon Spending 9/3/26: $942,699, 874,972

~~That 19 billion, one hundred and twenty-seven million, six hundred and nineteen thousand, four hundred and thirty-five dollars this week. (8/28-9/3) AND five billion, eight hundred and thirty-three million, one hundred and seventy thousand, five hundred dollar in 3 days.

Pentagon Spending 9/1/26: $936,866,704,472

Pentagon Spending 8/27/26: $923,572,255,537

Peace is the virtue of civilization. War is its crime. --Victor Hugo

Pentagon Spending in August 2026: $89,089,647,361

Pentagon Spending in July 2026: $85,053,017,282

Pentagon Spending in June 2026: $82,621,957,422

Pentagon Spending in May 2026: $87,601,145,719

Pentagon Spending in April 2026: $81,264,897,194

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Men can starve from a lack of self-realization as much as they can from a lack of bread. --Richard Wright

Famous Last Words: ...And know you know the rest of the story. --Paul Harvey

..........Don't talk to me in circles in some mumbo-jumbo jive.........Dolly Parton …..Straight Talk

I just took a home DNA test. Turns out I'm 100% going to jail for shoplifting. °° If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA Helicase so I could unzip your genes.

May Peace inhabit your soul

And Joy haunt your spirit

prairie mama

christine

Last Laugh:

Conned ePistle

Famous First Words: Hear ye, lords, nobles and freemen... --Richard Wagner: Lohengrin

It's World Science Ficition Convention time (27-31). It's being held next week in Los Angeles. You know what a sci-fi fan with one hand in the future is called? A future-wrist. || Little Know Fact: Mordor had a National ORCestra.

..........Large blue-green footprints that glow in the dark.........The Byrds …..Hey, Mr Spaceman

Faith lifts the soul, hope supports it, experience says it must, and Love says...let it be! --St Elizabeth Ann Seton

If I see someone without a smile, I give them mine. --Dolly Parton

It is a lovely Friday morning. The sky is filled with fluffy white clouds floating peacefully along on very little wind. Our 63°F temperature is perfect for being outside to listen to the birds call. They may be warning each other that Veronica the cat is sitting just inside the slightly open door. Or they may just be enjoying the morning with a song. Puck has been out and is back in lying with his head under the bed, snoring and coughing as he does. Everything is still so green and lush. The trees seem to fill space solidly with branches and leaves that move and dance so easily. Flowers and fruits supply color contrasts to the green – purple poke berries, flashy yellow bursts of some sort in the neighbor's backyard, and small blue dots in the grass along the fence. I am sipping my decaf on this beautiful late summer day and writing to you. I'm doing well, hope you are too.

Hope your weekend is out of the world, Earthlings

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It was one of the dullest speeches I ever heard. The Agee woman told us for three quarters of an hour how she came to write her beastly book, when a simple apology was all that was required. --P G Wodehouse

Book Recommendations of the Week: My favorite Sci-Fi book is The Stars My Destination by Alfred Bester. ...A far future where humans have learned to teleport...Wonderful strange characters...Lots to think about. The only book I'm aware of about WorldCons is Charles Ford Never Mentioned Wombats by Gene DeWeese & Buck Coulson. It's fan fiction about AussieCon (1) in Melbourne in 1975. It's amusing and gives some insight into what the con is like. I'm reluctant to recommend books. Tastes are different and all tastes are valid. Both of these have an amusing and light voice and contain irony and fun. Extra Credit: Charles Fort

When technology gets in the way of progress it's called Science Friction. || Some fans get married during conventions and, amazingly enough, those marriages are actually valid. If a Trek fan married Seven of Nine, he'd have 999,999,999,777 in-laws.

..........Ground Control to Major Tom.........David Bowie …..Space Oddity

It's a good thing I was born a girl, otherwise I'd be a drag queen. --Dolly Parton

Trivia Questions: What do we really know about WorldCon?

1. When was the first World Science Fiction Convention held?

2. How many people attended the first WorldCon?

3. How many people attended the 2025 World Con 84 in Seattle?

4. Who are the guests of honor this year?

5. Where is next year's ('27) convention being held?

Big Hello: Molo – Xhosa (South Africa) https://www.berlitz.com/blog/hello-different-languages

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If AI is so smart, why aren't we using it to design eco-friendly AI data centers that run on renewable energy? --am of co

Image of the Week: ConWeek Protest Sign: --Lawrence, KS

Doctor Who fans are so dedicated they will spend 40 minutes explaining how a wooden box is anatomically larger on the inside, but they can't explain why they are still single. || Men at WorldCon are like UFOs. You don't know where they're from, what their mission is, or when they might just take off.

..........Well, we had a lot of luck on Venus.........Deep Purple …..Space Truckin'

I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb -- and I'm not blonde either. --Dolly Parton

Moonbeam: The principle cause of war is war itself. --C Wright Mills

Blasphemy of the Week: A god that needs violent men to succeed is a god invented by violent men. --Benjamin Cremer --Submitted by MMS

Coffee Joke of the Week: I like my coffee like I like my alarm, strong enough to wake me up but not give me a heart attack.

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Yikes! The only vegetable they're not recalling is Mitch McConnell! --Submitted by mm

Science Fiction Ramble of the Week: I read Philip K Dick (A Scanner Darkly, The Man In The High Tower, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep, and more) and came to the conclusion that he must be the most paranoid person ever. Until I saw the latest generation of far right politicians. They make Dick look like a mindfulness guru. They are afraid of everything and everybody. How tiresome. So...do we think the secret service just got sick and tired of him and made up that missile stuff about his stupid airplane, just to mock him? “Oh No! Your fancy jet doesn't have anti-torpedo hardware. What shall we do? We've had threats. Right? You guys heard it, right? It was definitely a threat. Mr President, you need to hide in this catering scooter, to be safe, sir. Yes, we'll leave the food in there.” ~~How long have presidents been flying around with armed anti-missile missiles? It's not a thought that makes me feel safer.

Dr Brown was the first to notice that birds time travel in groups called flocks capacitors. || I love time travel jokes. Sometimes I laugh at them again, yesterday.

..........And the zipping white light beams.........The Killers …..Spaceman

Storms make the trees take deeper roots. --Dolly Parton

1) Organized by the World Science Fiction Society (WSFS), the first WorldCon was held on July 2, 1939 in New York City.

Almanac: It is Friday, August 28, 2026. The moon is full (Sturgeon) tonight and is in Pisces. Today is Asian American, Native Hawaiian and Pacific Islander Day, Women's Equal Pay Day, Crackers Over The Keyboard Day, National Bow Tie Day, National Power Rangers Day, National Thoughtful Day, National Weed Out Hate Day, Race Your Mouse Around the Icons Day, Radio Commercials Day, Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day (lost pets), Read Comics in Public Day, and National Sport Sampling Day. Because it is the 241^st day of the year it is also Red Wine Day.

Among those born on this day were Johan Wolfgang von Goethe (1749), Elizabeth Ann Seton (1774), Bruno Bettelheim (1903), Roger Tory Peterson (1908), C Wright Mills (1916), Jack Kirby (1917), Donald O'Connor (1925), Ron Guidry (1950), Daniel Stern (1957), Scott Hamilton (1957), David Fincher (1962), Shania Twain (I965), Jack Black (1969), Jason Priestley (1969), and LeAnn Rimes (1982).

On August twenty-eight Herschel discovered Saturn's moon Enceladus (1789), Lohengrin was first produced (1850), UPS began service (Seattle, 1907), 10 suffragists were arrested at the White House gate (1917), golf's Walker Cup tournament was established (1922), Kalamazoo passed an ordinance forbidding dancers from gazing into each other eyes (1923). Strom Thurmond began a 24 hour filibuster against the civil rights bill (1957), 200,000 demonstrated for equal rights (DC, 1963), and police and demonstrators clashed at the National Democratic Convention (Chicago, 1968).

Night Sky, 8/28: The moon reached full at around midnight after the lunar eclipse.

Fraternal Picture of the Week: At the Chihuly Glass Museum

This Week: Saturday, August 29 – According To Hoyle Day & Individual Rights Day & More Herbs Less Salt Day

Sunday, August 30 – International Whale Shark Day & Jimmy Buffet Day & National Grief Awareness Day

Night Sky, 8/30: In the west in the evening the moon and Saturn get close and Venus is not far behind.

Monday, August 31 – International Day for People Of African Decent & Trail Mix Day

Tuesday, September 1- National Burnt Ends Day & National Toy Testing Day & Meteorological Autumn & World Letter Writing Day

Night Sky, 9/1: Mars and Jupiter can be seen high in the predawn sky.

Wednesday, September 2- Bison-ten Yell Day & V-J Day & World Coconut Day

Thursday, September 3- National Cinema Day & Pressed Pennies Day & Skyscraper Day

Night Sky, 9/3: Sunrise: 6:47 am Sunset: 7:55 pm 13 hours and 8 minutes of daylight. Moonset: 2:06 pm Moonrise: 11:19 pm

An EOU computer is one without AI. || Three conspiracy theorists walk into WorldCon at the same time. Don't tell me that's just a coincidence.

..........It's seventh from the sun.........Man-Or-Astro-Man …..Uranus

I would never stoop so low as to be fashionable. --Dolly Parton

2) About 200 people attended the first WorldCon which was named NyCon 1. The guest of honor was Frank R Paul. Also attending were John W Campbell, Isaac Asimov, L Sprague de Camp, Harry Harrison, Ray Bradbury, and others.

Dolly Parton Video of the Week: 9 to 5 (2:33) ~~Heads Up, campers, we're gonna need to double or triple our joy levels here to make up for the amount of joy that woman took with her. https://youtu.be/UbxUSsFXYo4

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Congratulations to our Orange Leader: Your approval numbers are now lower than your felon numbers. --Submitted by jl of ks

Moonbeam: People with advantages are loath to believe that they just happen to be people with advantages. --C Wright Mills

Fun Fact of the Week: The Walker Cup is a golf tournament held in odd numbered years since 1921. Participants are 2 teams, one from the US and one from Great Britain. In 2026 the tournament changed to being held in even numbered years. They did this by holding matches in both 2025 and 2026. Either they didn't say why they were changing it or I didn't read enough.

Kansas Fun Fact of the Week: Kansas had the first Imagination Library outside of Dolly Parton's native Tennessee.

Video of the Week: Rosie O'Donnell singing O Donny Boy while hosting the Jimmy Kimmel show (1:49) https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=1825139651802849

Cheerfulness prepares a glorious mind for all the noblest acts. --St Elizabeth Ann Seton

It's hard to be a diamond in a rhinestone world. --Dolly Parton

I've loved and been loved. The rest is none of your business. --Tim Curry

To make their robots more human-like, Japan created AS – Artificial Stupidity. || Do beings on other planets watch Ancient Aliens and laugh?

..........'Twas in the darkest depths of Mordor, I met a girl so fair.........Led Zeppelin …..Ramble On

3) The 2025 WorldCon 83 sold 5500 full convention tickets and about 2000 single day tickets.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Not even the footnotes know what Hegel is talking about. ----Submitted by Philosophy Matters

Weird Word of the Week: Ombrophile (n) – Someone who finds joy in rainy weather. https://www.dictai.org/w/ombrophile

Dragon of the Week: Elliot aka Pete's Dragon

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Neutralize skunk odor. Pour four two-liter bottles of Coke into a bucket, sponge yourself down in the shower and rinse clean. The acids in Coca-Cola kill skunk odor. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/cocacola3.html

Clara the Clone was acting strange so the tech asked if she was beside herself. Now all the clones are acting strange. || I count Apollo 13 as my favorite science-fiction film because they sent those guys out there using slide rules. I find that hard to believe.

It costs a lot of money to look this cheap. --Dolly Parton

...........Have you looked at all of the galaxy of stars..........Jefferson Starship …..Have You Seen The Stars Tonight

4) Barbara Hambly, Ronald D Moore, Colleen Doran, Anita Sengupta, Tim Kirk, Geri Sullivan, and Stan Sakai are all guests of honor at LACon V.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: English is funny. We can say things like this and they're perfectly correct: The drinks we had had had had an effect... --Submitted by rl of ca

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: The 84^th World Science Fiction Convention: LAcon V (27-31. Anaheim, CA) Dare to Discover, Dare to Explore, Dare to be Uncharted! https://www.lacon.org/

A Look Back To Last Week: Bumper Sticker: No need to vaccinate all of your children, only the ones you want to keep.

Spark of Joy of the Week: If 5/4 is Star Wars day then 9/25 should be Dolly Parton Day. --Submitted by Catsonacouch

'Nother Spark of Joy of the Week: When Kurt Vonnegut told Joseph Heller that a hedge fund manager they knew made more money in a single day than Catch-22 had made over its history, Heller responded, “Yes, but I have something he will never have... enough”. --Submitted by Catsonacouch

Why is the Convention's Anime Suite always filled with 40 year old men? || How many Star Wars characters does it take to change a lightbulb. 12 Solo clones – many Hans make light work. || Are science fiction poems written in uni-verse?

..........Let me see what spring is like on Jupiter and Mars.........Ella Fitzgerald …..Fly Me To The Moon

Love is something sent from heaven to worry the hell out of you. --Dolly Parton

5) WorldCon 85 aka Montréal WorldCon will be in Montréal, Québec. No dates have yet been released. LACon V votes on the con city for 2028. https://montreal2027.ca/

Protest Sign of the Week: Eggs Are Expensive Because All The Chickens Are In Congress

Quote of the Week: Time to ban viagra because if pregnancy is “god's will”, then so is your limp dick. --Bette Midler

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I was the first woman to burn my bra. It took the fire department 4 days to put it out. --Dolly Parton

Today's Peace of History: August 28 , 1963: Martin Luther King, Jr delivered his “I Have A Dream” speech from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial to a crowd of half a million people.

Harold went to WorldCon in his Mr Potatohead suit and called himself Darth Tater. || Two Doctor Who's just won't work. It would be a paradox. || It is estimated that at the convention this year there will be 1,547 people with a dog named Picard.

..........It had one long horn and one big eye.........Sheb Wooley …..Flyin' Purple People Eater

Smile – it increases your face value. --Dolly Parton

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, August 28, 2026: Conned ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Every revolution has its counterrevolution – that is a sign the revolution is for real. --C Wright Mills

Cost of War: Pentagon Spending 8/27/26: $923,572,255,537 ~~That's Nineteen billion, nine hundred and thirty-four million, three hundred and thirty-four thousand, eighty dollars this week.

Pentagon Spending 8/20/26: $903,637,921,457

Pentagon Spending 8/13/26: $883,965,942,581

Pentagon Spending 8/6/26: $864,530,913,011

Pentagon Spending 8/1/26: $847,776,457,111

Peace is not someone else's responsibility. --BHIKKHU PAÑÑĀKĀRA

Pentagon Spending in July 2026: $85,053,017,282

Pentagon Spending in June 2026: $82,621,957,422

Pentagon Spending in May 2026: $87,601,145,719

Pentagon Spending in April 2026: $81,264,897,194

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Be attentive to the voice of grace. --St Elizabeth Ann Seton

Whenever you have the chance, go and find a horizon. It opens up the brain. --Tim Curry (1946-2026)

Find out who you are and do it on purpose. --Dolly Parton

Famous Last Words: Alas! --King and the chorus Richard Wagner: Lohengrin

..........Mars ain't no kind of place to raise your kids.........Elton John …..Rocket Man

Trekkies can't pick up dates at a Star Wars convention. It's just looking in Alderaan places. || Groan of the Day: A hologram walked into a prism. OOPS.

Threat of the Week: Sean Hannity warn the US could end up like Canada if the Democrats win the midterms. https://www.facebook.com/RiseUpAndResist

May The Peace strengthen you

And The Joy delight you

prairie mama

christine

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