rEd ePistle

 Famous First Words: Act of Confederation... Articles of Confederation Adopted 11/15/1777

Since we may soon be a Russian Ally, we might as well get a laugh out of it. A Russian agent, a sexual predator, and a billionaire walk into a bar. The bartender says, What'll it be, Mr. President.” + A Listener asked us: “What is the longest joke?” We answer: The speech made by Khrushchev at the Party congress.

..........we think and we act as one.........Rosemary Clooney and Vera Ellen …..Sisters

Necessity is the plea of every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.” --William Pitt the elder

It is a lovely Friday morning. The temperature is cool (48°F) suggesting that fall may finally be here. There is no breeze; not even the smallest leaves are astir. The sky is clear and the rising sun seems to accent the reds and yellows among the greens on the tops of trees. Birds are calling to one another in the backyard and across the street. Rarely seen but heard clearly. The world smells of fall, of dampness and dying foliage, of quiet and stillness. Puck hurried his morning outing and is back to sleep on my pillow. He does not seem to appreciate the autumn temperature in the least. Mary and Martha are still abed wherever they are. I am munching on high fiber cereal and drinking coffee. When I turn to look out the window, I linger, waiting for some movement, some sign of life. Finally, a morning jogger passes to let me know the rest of the world is still there and still chugging along. I trust you too are still there and still chugging along, ePistlier. Big hugs from me.

Privet, poslaiyя (I'm pretending that this means, hello, ePistlie(r)s, in Russian but really, it's a guess)

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Due to unfortunate circumstances, I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

What is the difference between Russia and Reality? Trump has connections to Russia. + A man came home and found his wife in bed with a stranger. Furious, the man shouted, “You, good for nothing, look at what you're spending your time for, while at the corner store they're selling eggs, and they only have three boxes left!”

..........And the load doesn't weigh me down at all.........The Hollies …..He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother

Trivia Questions: Happy Birthday to the Articles of Confederation

• ^ In the articles, who had the power to levy taxes?
• ^^ What was needed for the Articles to become law?
• ^^^ What was the first state to ratify the Articles?
• ^^^^ Which state did not ratify the Articles?
• ^^^^^ In the Articles, what methods could Congress use to raise money?

Big Hello: Khe chare – Pashto (Afghanistan, Iran, Pakistan) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When the results hit, we didn't panic. We grabbed our towels and sighed. --The 42 Collective https://www.facebook.com/42collective

Image of the Week: Puck's friend, Mary, also chief competition for alphadog ~~The white swirl is her Bonnie Raitt Curl

Library Humor of the Week: Add “ing” to the end of a book title to completely change the meaning: A Man For All Seasonings, Jurassic Parking https://www.facebook.com/groups/347731464692853/

One of the best things about being Russian is voting in American elections. + A man walked into the district committee of The Party and said, “I wish to join the Party. Where should I start?” They told him to visit a psychiatrist.

..........To me he is was so wonderful.........Eddie Fisher …..O, My Papa

Moonbeam: Americans wanted to settle all our difficulties with Russia and then go to the movies and drink coke. --Averell Harriman

Blasphemy of the Week: Inspiring sermon, Rev, I've never heard bigotry sound so virtuous.

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Mark Maxwell-Smith. Name a place where experiments are done (two words). Drop the last letter of each word. The remaining letters, read from left to right, will name someone famously associated with experiments. Who is it? NPR Sunday Puzzle 11/9/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The Amazon Dating App: You recently got married. Here are some similar people you may be interested in. --Submitted by FNOG

In Capitalist America, citizens have a right to bear arms; in Russia citizens have a right to the whole bear. + Stalin summoned Radek and said, “I know you spread jokes about me. It's impertinent.” “Why” “I am the Great Leader, Teacher, and Friend of the people after all.” “No, I've not told anybody that joke.”

..........And never gets carried away.........Louise and Baby June …..If Momma Was Married

^ The Articles of Confederation allowed the states to levy taxes for funds, Congress was not given that power.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 15, 2025. The moon is full (Beaver) tonight at 21:28 and is in Taurus. Today is America Recycles Day, George Spelvin Day or More Than One Role Day, I Love to Write Day, National Bundt (Pan) Day, National Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day, National Philanthropy Day, Roc Your Mocs Day, and Steve Irwin Day.

Among those born on this day were William Pitt (the elder, 1708), William Herschel (1738), Gerhart Hauptmann (1862), Lewis Stone (1879), Georgia O'Keeffe (1887), Erwin Rommel (1891), Averell Harriman (1891), Mantovani (1905), Edward Asner (1929), Petula Clark (1931), Sam Waterston (1940), and Beverly D'Angelo (1954).

On November fifteenth the Articles of Confederation were adopted by congress (1777), Pike first sighted Pike's Peak** (1806), the League of Nations held its first meeting (1920), NBC broadcast its first show on a radio network (1926), the Cow Palace in San Francisco opened (1941), Gemini XII returned to Earth (1966), and Leonid I Brezhnev was buried (1982).

**Before Pike it was called Sun Mountain Sitting Big.

Night Sky, 11/15: Venus sets around 8 pm. It is finally setting well after the end of twilight so that it becomes very obvious. https://tucsonastronomy.org/planets-of-the-month-november-2024/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Cowboy Boots Ghost and Redsleeves are still at it...this time with Grandma Kirsten

This Week: Saturday, November 16 – International Day for Tolerance & National Button Day & National Check Your Wipers Day

Night Sky, 11/16: Leonids Meteor Shower peaks tonight. The Planetary Society

Sunday, November 17 – Homemade Bread Day & National Butter Day & Take A Hike Day

Monday, November 18 – Mickey Mouse Day & Married to a Scorpio Support Day

Tuesday, November 19 – Family Day & Have A Bad Day Day & Red Shawl Day & Rocky and Bullwinkle Day & Women's Entrepreneurship Day & World Toilet Day

Wednesday, November 20 – GOHARD (Globally Organized Hug A Runner Day) & National Child's Day

Thursday, November 21 – Use Less Stuff Day & World Hello Day & World Philosophy Day

Night Sky, 11/21: Alpha Monocerotids Meteor Shower Universe Guide

Russian jokes are like Russian soldiers; they never grow old. + A rich Russian consulted an architect about building three swimming pools: one with cold water, one with warm water and one without any water. Because some of his friends can't swim.

..........That's the kind of trouble I need plenty of.........Elvis Presley …..Kissin' Cousins

^^ All colonies needed to ratify the Articles of Confederation in order for them to become law.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: We've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas. --Submitted by MMS

Moonbeam: The undevout astronomer must be mad. --William Herschel

Fun Fact of the Week: According to historical records, NBC's first broadcast on their radio network in 1926 was a gala four-hour program originating from the ballroom of the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel in New York City; essentially, it was a special event showcasing various stars from the theater, concert, and radio fields, rather than a single named show.

Video of the Week: An early television commercial teaching children to recycle (:30) https://www.ispot.tv/ad/AgSA/keep-america-beautiful-creative-galaxy-recycling

Where laws end, tyranny begins. --William Pitt the elder

In Capitalist America, you break the law. In Soviet Russia, the law breaks you. + Putin calls the White House: “Hello, Donald? I would like to discuss Ukraine with you.” Trump: “What's Ukraine?” Putin: “Thanks, Donald.”

..........He laughs hard and carries on.........Houndstooth …..My Cousin Greg

^^^ Virginia was the first state to ratify the Articles of Confederation. The vote was taken on December 16, 1777.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Here's a joke circulating in Germany: What borders on stupidity? Mexico and Canada

Weird Word of the Week: Scrumping: An early meaning of scrumping referred to taking windfalls or the small apples left on the trees after harvest. This evolved into illicitly taking any sort of apples. It can even more broadly mean theft of any kind, though this is rare. http://www.worldwidewords.org/ww-scr2.html

Dragon of the Week: Origami Dragon

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Fix a leaking shower head. If the shower head is leaking from the connection to the shower arm, unscrew the shower head, apply ChapStick to the threads, and screw the showerhead back in place. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/chapstick.html

In Russia the fool pities Mr T. + They caught Bin Laden. Washed him, gave him a haircut, turns out it was Berezovsky.

...........That the old grey goose is dead.........Dany Rosevear …..Go Tell Aunt Rhody

^^^^ Maryland was the last state to approve the Articles of Confederation. They wanted to make sure other states gave up any claims west of the Ohio River.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Maturing is realizing you don't need to have fun to have alcohol. --Submitted by ar of ks

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: ST-DAL (15-17, Dallas, TX ) Trek to Dallas 2024 https://www.creationent.com/cal/st_dal/index.html

Actual Science Conference of the Week: KubeCon / CloudNativeCon (12-15, Salt Lake City, UT) ...leading open source and cloud native communities... Very Long Address

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Test Lab → Tesla (Nikola Tesla)

In Capitalist America, bank robs you. + What would you do if they opened the borders? I would climb a tree. Why? So I don't get killed in the stampede.

..........Hands across the water, heads across the sky.........The Beatles …..Uncle Albert

^^^^^ The Articles of Confederation allowed the US Congress to ask states for money, borrow from foreign governments, or selling western (i.e. Indian) lands.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: “How can we have had record turnout and twenty million fewer votes cast nationally?” author John Pavlovitz wrote in a post viewed 5.3 million times. https://www.wired.com/story/election-denial-conspiracy-theories-x-left-blueanon/

Quote of the Week: How television stages the world becomes the model for how the world is properly to be staged. --Neil Postman

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I hope we can all still be friends even if we end up in different concentration camps. --Submitted by sb of ar

Today's Peace of History, November 15, 1957: US Committee for a Sane Nuclear Policy (SANE) was founded.

Putin's plan for a new economy. The goal? Make people rich and happy. List of people attached. + Do you have a hobby, Leonid Llyich? Of course, I collect jokes about myself. Have you got many? Two and a half labor camps already.

..........She had hoof prints on her forehead........Elmo & Patsy …..Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, November 15, 2024, rEd ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: My painting is what I have to give back to the world for what the world gives to me. --Georgia O'Keeffe

Observation of the Week: The Supreme Court legalized Execution By Pregnancy.

Cost of War:

• As of 11/14/24 State Department Costs: $250,613,878,416
• As of 11/07/24 State Department Costs: $250,060,504,855
• As of 11/14/24 Homeland Security: $1,183,925,445,174
• As of 11/07/24 Homeland Security: $1,183,324,378,593
• As of 11/14/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,259,094,104,670
• As of 11/07/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,257,548,571,963
• As of 11/14/24 Military Costs: $3,115,664,683,797
• As of 11/07/24 Military Costs: $3,114,490,525,836
• As of 11/14/24 Veterans Care: $3,945,983,427,015
• As of 11/07/24 Veterans Care: $3,969,526,852,485
• As of 11/14/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,778,832,448,837
• As of 11/07/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,763,227,848,266

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Unlimited power is apt to corrupt the minds of those who possess it. --William Pitt the elder

Famous Last Words: I'm going, but I'm ready. --Tyrone Power died 11/15/58 of a heart attack

..........She was a stairway to heaven, Old Apollo 11.........Jimmy Buffett …..The Rocket That Grandpa Rode ~~Because November is Family Stories Month

What is a Russian string quartet? The members of a Russian orchestra that actually comes back from a US tour. + “Comrade Rabinowitz, why weren't you present at the last meeting of the Communist Party?” “No one told me it was the last one. If I had known that I would have come with my whole family.”

May Peace ground your soul
And Joy lift your heart
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh:

pUnitive ePistle

 Famous First Words: When Caroline Meeber boarded the afternoon train... Theodore Dreiser Sister Carrie

It's Aid And Abet Punsters Day!! It seems there were two frogs sitting on a lily pad, when all of a sudden, a fly came along. One frog put out his tongue, ate the fly, and started laughing hysterically. Soon the other frog joined in the laughter. Later in the day, the other frog ate a fly and the two frogs burst out in laughter. As time went on, the frogs enjoyed the flies so much that the sight of a fly would cause them to double up with pleasure (if it's possible for frogs to double up!). But of course, the most pleasure came when the fly was actually eaten. A third frog hopped up to the first two and asked what was so funny. The first frog answered "Time." "Huh?" asked the third frog. The second frog explained: "Time's fun when you're having flies." --Grieg Olsen

..........It's more trouble than it's worth..........Ricky Lee Jones …..Livin It Up

Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate. --John F Kennedy Inaugural Address

It is a cool (47°F) Friday morning. The sky is a dirty white with a few patches of actual gray. Old Sol has not broken the thick cloud sleet anywhere. Breezes are very light and move only the tips of plants; wind chimes jiggle without chiming and crispy hydrangeas sway but do not drop their petals. There is still substantial green but browns and yellows are gaining ground and tree limbs. Puck is asleep with his face between two pillows at the head of the bed. Perhaps it is his way of celebrating Dunce Day. I am sipping half-caf and munching on cream cheese and crackers. NPR is quietly playing in another room; a woman is talking about NCU and KU playing basketball this evening. It is a peaceful, easy morning and I get to write to you. What a beautiful morning, indeed.

Hope this weekend all you encounter is punny, ePistlers.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: It was her habit to build laughter out of inadequate materials. --John Steinbeck The Grapes of Wrath

A king carried environmentalism too far when he prohibited hunting of any kind. Soon the realm was overrun with lions and tigers and bears. "Oh My!" shouted the people. They revolted and threw the king out of the country. It was the first time the reign was called because of the game. --Grieg Olsen

..........She may be a highbrow; I've seen her change it three times a day.........Bonnie Raitt & Sippy Wallace …..Women Be Wise

Trivia Questions: Happy 135^th Birthday to Montana!

• ^ What is the capital of Montana?
• ^^ What is the origin of the name Montana?
• ^^^ To which large bodies of water do Montana's many rivers run?
• ^^^^ For what is Montanan Jeanette Rankin known?
• ^^^^^ What three tribes united to defeat Custer at Little Bighorn?

Big Hello: Dona dia – Papiamento (Aruba & Netherlands Antilles) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The people who ruined the world have ties and business suits not tattoos and bikes. --Submitted by bc of tx

Image of the Week: Jane Live and Christine Smith at the Lawrence Rally for Women's Rights

Library Humor of the Week: Seriously, hear me out: A Scholastic Book Fair for Adults at a Bar. https://www.facebook.com/librarylaughs/

While hiking in the woods, Nate and Sam found this huge rock which had an old iron lever attached to it. Etched into the rock was the following inscription: "If this lever is pulled, the world will come to an end!" Nate wanted to pull the lever and see what would happen, but Sam, being a paranoid pessimist, greatly feared this! He said to Nate that if he tried to pull the lever, he'd shoot him! In a daring attempt, Nate lunged for the lever, and sure enough, Sam shot him! What is the moral of this story? Better Nate than lever! --Jim Speirs

..........It's all for best, so you say.........Bonnie Raitt …..Too Soon To Tell

Moonbeam: We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love and that love comes with community. --Dorothy Day

Blasphemy of the Week: It's too hard to sit at tables that Jesus would have flipped. --Jen Boettger Boring

Puzzle of the Week: Name a place somewhere on the globe — in two words. Rearrange the letters of the first word to name some animals. The second word in the place name is something those animals sometimes do. What is it? --NPR Sunday Puzzle 11/3/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: When the moon hits your eye like it's 5:45, that November --Submitted by RHOZ

..........My old man is another child who's grown old.........Bonnie Raitt & John Prine …..Angel From Montgomery

^ Helena is the capital city of the US state of Montana and the seat of Lewis and Clark County. Helena was founded as a gold camp during the Montana gold rush, and established on October 30, 1864.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 8, 2024. The moon goes into the first quarter tomorrow (11/9) and is in Aquarius. It is Intersex Day of Remembrance, National Parents as Teachers Day, Abet and Aid Punsters Day, Cook Something Bold and Pungent Day, Dunce Day, International Day of Radiology, National S.T.E.M./S.T.E.A.M. Day, Shakespeare Authorship Mystery Day, World Town Planning Day, and X-Ray Day. In Montana it is Admission Day (1889).

Among those born on this day were Edmund Halley (1656), Dorothy Day (1897), Margaret Mitchell (1900), June Havoc (1916), Esther Rolle (1922), Patti Page (1927), Morley Safer (1931), Bonnie Raitt (1949), and Rickie Lee Jones (1954).

On November eighth Bourbon Whiskey was first distilled from corn (1789), the Louvre opened (1793), Montana was admitted to the union (41st, 1889), Cleveland was elected president (1892), Sister Carrie was published (1900), women voted for the first time in Washington state (1910), FDR was elected president for the first time (1932), the first black female legislator was elected (PA, 1938), JFK was elected (1960), and Days of Our Lives premiered (1965).

Night Sky, 1/8: Mercury can be seen low over the southwestern horizon from about 15 minutes after sunset throughout November. https://www.highpointscientific.com/astronomy-hub/post/night-sky-news/whats-in-the-sky-this-month-november-2024

Fraternal Picture of the Week: The Nearly Blind Ghost in cowboy boots and Redsleeves the Unready

This Week: Saturday, November 9 – Carl Sagan Day & National Child Safety Council Day & World Freedom Day

Sunday, November 10 – Sesame Street Day & World Science Day for Peace and Development & Area Code Day

Night Sky, 11/10: Saturn reached opposition in September but remains well-placed for observation throughout the evening, You'll find it in Aquarius.

Monday, November 11 – Armistice Day & Forget-Me-Not Day & Origami Day & World Orphans Day

Tuesday, November 12 – Fancy Rat and Mouse Day & World Pneumonia Day

Night Sky, 11/12: Famously slow and long-lasting, Taurid meteors move across the sky at about 65,000 miles per hour – a fraction of the whizzing 148,000 mph meteors of the Orionid shower. https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2024/11/04/southern-taurid-meteor-shower-2024-peak-activity/76045866007/

Wednesday, November 13 – International Pathology Day & Sandwich Day & World Kindness Day

Thursday, November 14 – International Girls Day & Loosen Up, Lighten Up Day & World Diabetes Day

Mother Lion and Father Lion had gone off hunting, and had told their two children not to wander away. However, a couple of small gnus wandered by, and the baby lions could not resist the temptation to try out their own hunting skills. They ran out, chased after the gnus, killed them, and started eating them. Just as the baby lions were reaching the end of their meal, the parents appeared in the distance. One of the baby lions turned to the other, and said: "That is the end of the gnus. Here again are the head lions."

..........Another day to keep the wheel turnin'.........Bonnie Raitt …..Luck Of The Draw

^^ The origin of Montana's name can be traced back to the Spanish word "montaña," which translates to "mountainous."

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If a plant is sad, do other plants photosympathise with it ?

Moonbeam: The greatest challenge of the day is: how to bring about a revolution of the heart, a revolution which has to start with each one of us. --Dorothy Day

Fun Facts of the Week: Making puns “crosses all major languages and cultures in history,” --John Pollack, an international punning champion and the author of a historical look at the phenomenon, The Pun Also Rises. In San Juan Chamula, Mexico, a tradition of verbal duels called k’ehel k’op, which often revolves around puns, dates back to Mayan times. Traditional Palestinian weddings have featured pun-heavy oral poetry duels for centuries.

Video of the Week: 3 minute clip from the very first episode Days Of Our Lives

Civility is not a sign of weakness. John F Kennedy Inaugural Address

The recent lock-out of the Major League umpires was making them all grumpy. After a tough day of walking the picket lines, one umpire returned home to find that his young boy wanted to play with him. As the tired ump was sitting in his favorite easy chair, the lad kept trying to crawl onto his lap. The umpire snapped, yelled at the boy and the boy ran away crying. This proves the old adage: The Son Never Sits on the Brutish Umpire. --Td Striker

..........Pretty soon she'll have to choose and it tears her up inside.........Bonnie Raitt …..Nick Of Time

^^^ Montana distinguishes itself as the sole state with river systems that flow into the Hudson Bay, Pacific Ocean, and the Gulf of Mexico. This unique geographical feature showcases the state's diverse and interconnected waterways.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Church sign: St Francis of Assisi Blessing of the Animals and Fish Fry. --Submitted by High Church Coyote

Weird Word of the Week: Recrudescence: (17^th Century) the return of something terrible after a time of reprieve. https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/recrudescence

Dragon of the Week: Quilt

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Prevent tools from rusting. Give the tools a light coat of any flavor ChapStick. The wax keeps the metal dry, inhibiting rust. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/chapstick.html ~~Sometimes there are kinds of health or healing uses but I never include them. I don't want to recommend people do something that harms them in any way. No, there hasn't been one for ChapStick.

A few years ago the nuclear aircraft carrier Enterprise was returning to its base at the Oakland-Alameda Naval Base when the ship's captain, misreading the tides, managed to run the carrier aground on the mudflats of San Francisco bay. True story. This event went down in history as being one of the finest examples of grounding the warship you walk on.

...........Maybe they're seeing something we don't.........Bonnie Raitt …..Something To Talk About

^^^^ Jeannette Pickering Rankin was an American politician and women's rights advocate who became the first woman to hold federal office in the United States. She was elected to the US House of Representatives as a Republican from Montana in 1916.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm looking for a sneaker to wear while watching my friends run a marathon. --Ali Solomon

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Hal-Con 2024 (8-10, Halifax, CA Atlantic Canada's premiere sci-fi and gaming convention https://hal-con.com/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: AVS 70 International Symposium and Exhibition (3-8, Tampa, FL) emerging issues in materials, processing, and interfaces … Innovating Sustainability: Next Generation...) https://avs70.avs.org/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Hudson Bay → Hounds, bay

Once there was this cattle rancher who, after 3 years, finally found a buyer for his oldest steer Caesar. This new owner happened to be the rancher's closest neighbor, who lived on the other side of the river valley. "Men" the rancher said to his cowhands, "it's time to say our good-byes to this bull, and take him across the river". So the men roped Caesar, and walked him down to the river. They were about to put him on the boat, but the rancher's nephew, who helped to raise Caesar, said, "Can we take him out for one last munch in his favorite meadow?", with a tear in his eye. The other hands said sure, so he led him just off the riverbank for a snack. Well, with the day as nice as it was, all of the hands took a quick nap. 4 hours later, the rancher saw that the bull was still on his property and ran down into the valley. He shouted and cursed at the men to wake them up. Once everyone was standing, he said the beast should have been across long ago, "We've come to ferry Caesar, not to graze him!"

..........I want a man to hold me, not some fool to ask me why.........Bonnie Raitt …..Love Me Like A Man

^^^^^ The Battle of the Little Bighorn, also known as Custer's Last Stand, took place in 1876 near present-day Crow Agency, Montana. It was a conflict between the Lakota, Cheyenne, and Arapaho tribes and the US 7th Cavalry Regiment led by General George Custer. The Native American forces, led by Sitting Bull and Crazy Horse, defeated Custer's forces in a decisive victory.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: Trump has suggested that Canadian prime minister Justin Trudeau is secretly the son of Fidel Castro. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_conspiracy_theories_promoted_by_Donald_Trump

Quote of the Week: It takes analytical skills worthy of a degree in civil engineering to understand when and where one is allowed to leave a car in Montreal. --Kathy Riechs Death du Jour

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Huxleyed into the Full Orwell. --Submitted by dg of oh

Today's Peace of History, November 8, 1892: Thirty thousand black and white, factory and dock workers staged a general strike in New Orleans, demanding union recognition, closed shops, and hour and wage gains. They were joined by non-industrial laborers, such as musicians, clothing workers, clerks, utility workers, streetcar drivers, and printers.

A tall, weather-worn cowboy walked into a saloon and ordered a beer. The regulars quietly observed the drifter through half-closed eyelids. No one spoke, but they all noticed that the stranger's hat was made of brown wrapping paper. Less obvious was the fact that his shirt and vest were also made of paper. As were his chaps, , and even his boots, including paper spurs. Truth be told, even the saddle, blanket and bridle on his horse were made entirely of paper. The sheriff walks in and of course he arrests him immediately -- for rustling.

..........We were waltzin' together to a dreamy melody.........Patti Page ….Changing Partners

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, 2024, pUnitive ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: I really only love God as much as I love the person I love the least. --Dorothy Day

Cost of War:

• As of 11/07/24 State Department Costs: $250,060,504,855
• As of 10/31/24 State Department Costs: $249,502,256,656
• As of 11/07/24 Homeland Security: $1,183,324,378,593
• As of 10/31/24 Homeland Security: $1,182,718,054,199
• As of 11/07/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,257,548,571,963
• As of 10/31/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,255,989,416,760
• As of 11/07/24 Military Costs: $3,114,490,525,8365
• As of 11/07/24 Veterans Care: $3,957,801,8756
• As of 10/31/24 Military Costs: $3,113,306,878,4,736
• As of 10/31/24 Veterans Care: $3,945,983,427,015
• As of 11/07/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,763,227,848,266
• As of 10/31/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,747,502,367,834

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country. --John F Kennedy Inaugural Address

Famous Last Words: There shall be no denial of the elective franchise at any election on account of sex. --Washington State Constitutional Amendment #5 passed in 1910.

..........I'm very versatile.........June Havoc aka Baby June …..Let Me Entertain You ~~Obviously this song is from Gypsy. I don't know what the real Baby June sang.

There is the story of a group of chess enthusiasts, good friends all, who had a long day of chess matches. Late in the evening these friends went to the lobby of the large hotel where the matches were held, to talk a bit and rest. While their chat began quietly it gathered steam and got quite animated. They were telling each other of their successes of the day. One said he had won so many matches, another told of how he had beaten better players than himself. After a while of this, the hotel manager came over and summarily threw them all out, saying, "I can't abide chess nuts boasting in an open foyer". --John Baker

May your Peace be never missing
And your Joy be to the world
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh:

eTernal ePistle

Famous First Words: You told'st me thou didst hold him in thy hate. Not another political ad; it's the opening line of Othello spoken by Roderigo to Iago

Happy Plan Your Epitaph Day! Adams to Atoms -Joseph J Adams + I'd rather be reading this. --Esther Freer + Excuse My Dust --Dorothy Parker

..........'cause he rides the rodeo.........Judy Collins ….Someday Soon

It's not the voting that's democracy; it's the counting. --Tom Stoppard

It is crisp (44°F) Friday morning. The sky is blue without cloud or jet trail. There is no breeze to cause the limbs to dance or tear the leaves from their branches. The backyard squirrels are busy talking, or perhaps it's singing, with their little squeaks. Red and yellow tomatoes (in November) still cling to the vine waiting to be chosen for a salad or salsa. As the sun rises it reveals the many colors, the greens of garden plants and the reddish brown of the tree across the street, the yellows of the leaves on the ground. Even the red car in the driveway down the street blends into the fall motif. Puck, who went out briefly, is sleeping at my feet with a gentle snort of intaken breaths. Mary comes and goes into and out of our room silently. I am sipping creamy, sweetened half-caf and watching as a light eastern breeze arises and shakes the yellowed stem of what was once a sunflower. Kansas in autumn and I get to write to you. Great day,

Have a lively weekend, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Why is such a large part of early child education learning what sounds animals make. That's never going to come up. It's not even important if they ever meet those animals. I've never said “moo” to a cow and have it go “thank you for learning about my culture”. --Kyle --Submitted by FNOG

Here lies the shell, but the nut is gone –- Williams + The doctor will see you soon –Helen Tyler + There goes the neighborhood --Rodney Dangerfield

..........Who was once a bull-hooking son of a gun.........Moe Bandy ….Bandy the Rodeo Clown

Trivia Questions: Happy Prime Meridian Day!

• ^ What is the Prime Meridian anyway?
• ^^ How long is the Prime Meridian?
• ^^^ Which 3 continents does the Prime Meridian cross?
• ^^^^ How old is the Prime Meridian construct?
• ^^^^^ What's the difference between the Prime Meridian and the International Reference Meridian*

Big Hello: Alii – Palauan (Palau, Guam, & North Mariana Islands) https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Has anyone else found it weird that when “Star Trek” boldly goes where no one has gone before, they always find someone there? --Submitted by bc of tx

Image of the Week: Jeff got a jump on the season. He has Christmas Lights on his third floor balcony to keep his pumpkin company.

Library Humor of the Week: I won't pay the fine; I hated that book. https://www.facebook.com/librarylaughs

Pardon me for not rising. --Johnny Yeast + At last a hole in one. --Joel Cheskin + The best is yet to come --Frank Sinatra

..........I'd like to say that I took the reins and rode away.........Reba McEntire & Cody Johnson …..Dear Rodeo

Moonbeam: Sometimes, the most profound of awakenings come wrapped in the quietest of moments. --Stephen Crane

Blasphemy of the Week: There is no biblical evidence that Jesus even knew how to parallel park. Letting him take the wheel seems a bit irresponsible. --Submitted by FNOG

Both Sides Now of the Week: Kamala Harris can run over thousands of Palestinians in a tank on 5^th Avenue in broad daylight and blue maga would still vote for her. --Submitted by MMS

Puzzle of the Week: From listener David Dickerson, of Tucson, Arizona. The city UTICA, NEW YORK, when spelled out, contains 12 letters, all of them different. Think of a well-known U.S. city, that when its name is spelled out, contains 13 letters, all of them different. Your answer doesn't have to match mine. NPR Sunday Puzzle 10/28/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Letting men decide about women's health care is like letting your dog make decisions about your car because he likes to ride in it sometimes. --Submitted by 98%

Shit Happens –Edith Barlow + If you can read this, you are standing on my boobs –Bolamo + In --Jack Lemmon

..........Live fast, die young.........Johnny Cash …..Bull Rider

^ The Prime Meridian is an imaginary line that runs through Greenwich, a borough of London. It passes through the North and South poles and is also known as the 0° meridian. The Prime Meridian splits the globe into eastern and western hemispheres.

Almanac: It is Friday, November 1, 2024. The moon is new today (8:47 am) and is in Scorpio. Today is All Saints' Day, Author's Day, Cinnamon Day, Dia de Los Muertos (Day of The Dead), Extra Mile Day, Forgiveness & Happiness Day, Give Up Your Shoulds Day, International Pet Groomer Appreciation Day, National Authors' Day, National Biologic Coordinators Day, National Brush Day, National Calzone Day, National Family Caregiver Day, National Family Literacy Day, National Go Cook For Your Pets Day, National Sports Fan Day, Plan Your Epitaph Day, Prime Meridian Day, and World Vegan Day.

It is also the Celtic holiday Samhain. Because it is the First Friday it is Fountain Pen Day, Love Your Lawyer Day, National (Football) Day, and National Medical Science Liaison Awareness & Appreciation Day. And because it is the first weekend it is National Farm Toys Day and Pumpkin Chunkin Days.

Among those born on this day were Benvenuto Cellini (1500), Benjamin Lee Guinness (1798), Stephen Crane (1871), Sholem Asch (1880), James J. Kilpatrick (1920), Gary Player (1935), Larry Flynt (1942), Marcia Wallace (1942), and Lyle Lovett (1960).

On November first Vesuvius buried Pompei (79), Othello was first staged (1611), the mission at San Juan Capistrano was founded (1776), John Adams was the first president to move into the White House (1800), the first US women's medical school opened (1848), the US Weather Bureau began operations (1870), the Rodeo Cowboys Association was founded (1936), Charles Cooper became the first black NBA player (Celtics, 1950), the first concert was presented at the Fillmore in San Francisco (1965), the Eisenhower dollar went into circulation (1971), and the European Union came into existence (1993).

Night Sky, 11/1: November fireballs? Every year from about late October through mid-November, a truly dazzling Taurid meteor just might take you by surprise in the night. If you get very lucky. Normally the broad, weak, South and North Taurid meteor showers sputter along sparsely. Under ideal conditions you might see 5 or 10 ordinary little meteors per hour during the poorly defined, weeks-long maximum when the two branches of the shower overlap. Both include debris shed by Comet 2P/Encke, but a recent analysis shows that a host of other objects — near-Earth asteroids, collisional fragments, and dormant cometary nuclei — might be creating several overlapping streams of particles. Consequently, both Taurid components have long-lasting "maxima" that aren’t easy to pin down. What makes the Taurids potentially exciting is that their small numbers are known for a high proportion of bright fireballs — occasionally, an extremely bright one that makes the news. The Taurids strike the atmosphere at a relatively slow 19 miles (30 km) per second. If you see an especially bright, slow meteor these nights, check whether its line of flight, if traced backward far enough across the sky, would intersect more or less the Pleiades side of Taurus. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Gettin' spooky

This Week: Saturday, November 2 – Bison Day & National Play Outside Day & World Chili Day

Night Sky, 11/2: Daylight-saving time, observed in most of North America, ends at 2 am Sunday morning. Clocks "fall back" one hour. Daylight time for North America runs from the second Sunday in March to the first Sunday in November; the rules last changed in 2007. Daylight time is not used in Hawaii, Saskatchewan, Puerto Rico, or in most of Arizona.

Sunday, November 3 – Cliché Day & Public Television Day & Sandwich Day & Zero Tasking Day

Monday, November 4 – National Candy Day & Use Your Common Sense Day

Tuesday, November 5 – Election Day & Firewood Day & World Tsunami Awareness Day

Wednesday, November 6 – International Stress Awareness Day & Marijuana Recreational Legalization Day

Night Sky, 11/6: Saturn, magnitude +0.8 in Aquarius, is well up in the southeast as the stars come out. Don't confuse it with Fomalhaut two fists to its lower right. Saturn is highest in the south by 9 pm daylight-saving time.

Thursday, November 7 – National Men Make Dinner Day & Notary Public Day & Stout Day

Finally found a place to park in Georgetown --Katherine Brown + Destined to be a woman with too many cats –Susan Blanchard + Don't try --Charles Bukowski

..........Wild horse rider with nothin' to lose...........Luke Kaufman …..Broncin'

^^ The Prime Meridian is 20,000 km (12,447 miles) long.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: In your guts, you know he's nuts.

Moonbeam: Baseball ought never be hurried. It is the only unhurried institution we have left, which is one reason, I think, we love it. --James J Kilpatrick

Fun Facts of the Week: Happy Fountain Pen Day! Every fountain pen is unique! After using your ink pen for a long time, the nib slowly personalizes itself to your handwriting, making the pen special for you. The tip wears out to exactly your style, making it sometimes challenging to lend your pen out to other pen pals! This might come as a surprise, but left-handed people more often use fountain pens than right-handed people around the world!

Video of the Week: Lyle Lovett: If I Had a Boat: https://americana-uk.com/video-lyle-lovett-if-i-had-a-boat

If American women would increase their voting turnout by 10% I think we would see an end to all of the budget cuts in programs benefiting women and children. --Coretta Scott King

I see dumb people --Micah Green + Oh well whatever –Lola Holt + I'm a writer, but then, nobody's perfect --Billy Wilder

..........And each night begins a new day..........Willie Nelson …..Mammas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys

^^^ The Prime Meridian runs through Europe, Africa, and Antarctica.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Whenever you take yourself too seriously, remember that you share 70% of your DNA with a banana. --Submitted by sb of ar

Samhain 2024: From The Busy Pagan – Everything you need to know about Samhain: https://thebusypagan.com/pagan-holidays/samhain/ Sacred Samhain! Blessed Be

Weird Word of the Week: Shufti or shufty – to look. From the Arabic, “have you seen?” http://www.worldwidewords.org/qa-shu1.html

Dragon of the Week: Coffee table

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Groom a mustache or eyebrows. A little ChapStick will keep the ends of a mustache waxed together and keep bushy eyebrow hairs in place. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/chapstick.html

He never killed a man that did not need killing –Robert Allison + I'd rather be in Acapulco --Edward Gann + I will not be right back after this message. --Merv Griffin

...........It's another great day to be looking that good.........Kenny Feidler …..Barrel Racer Land

^^^^ The Prime Meridian was established in 1884 at the International Meridian Conference in Washington, DC. It was the internationally recognized prime meridian until it was replaced by the International Reference Meridian*(IRM) in 1984.

*I'd never heard of it either and though I have read the definition (below) everyday this week, I'm still not sure I understand it

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Trump could shoot me on 5 Avenue and I would still find a way to vote for Harris. Submitted by bu of ks

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Creation Chicago 2024 (1-3, Rosemont, IL) the ultimate Supernatural fan event /https://www.choosechicago.com/event/creation-chicago-salute-to-supernatural-2/2024-11-03/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: International Conference on Science, Engineering, and Technology (1-2, NYC) share ideas with peers in person. https://www.allconferencealert.com/event/1183171

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Caspar, Wyoming

I knew this would happen –George W Jr + This ain't bad – once you get used to it --Murphy Dreher Jr + Damn it's dark down here –Fran Thatcher

..........And his wounds have almost healed.........Garth Brooks …..Rodeo

^^^^^ The prime meridian is a fixed line of longitude at 0°, while the IRM is a weighted average of the reference meridians of many ground stations. The IRM moves as the Earth's surface shifts.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: In the past week, U.S. Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene claimed a voting machine had changed a voter’s ballot in her Georgia district during early voting, and Elon Musk, the billionaire owner of the social media platform X, has promoted various conspiracy theories about voting machines and voter fraud both online and at a rally for Trump in Pennsylvania. https://www.pbs.org/newshour/politics/election-officials-confront-tsunami-of-voting-conspiracy-theories

Quote of the Week: When the people are being beaten with a stick, they are not much happier if it is called “the People's Stick.” --Mikhail Bakunin

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I think I need to quit my job and focus on my laundry. --Submitted by INRITH

Today's Peace of History, November 1, 1848: The New England Female Medical College was founded, becoming the first institution in the US to train women in medicine and graduated the first black female physician, Dr Rebecca Lee Crumpler (1864)

Too bad … We had fun –Constance Bigsby + Stepped on the gas instead of the brake --Jonathan Blake + You've come home --Lucille Ball

..........what else can make a man hold on that tight..........Jenny Tolman …..Rodeo Must Be a Woman

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, November 1, 2024, eTernal ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Writing comes more easily if you have something to say. --Sholem Asch

Cost of War:

• As of 10/31/24 State Department Costs $249,502,256,656
• As of 10/24/24 State Department Costs: $248,970,969,494
• As of 10/31/24 Homeland Security: $1,182,718,054,199
• As of 10/24/24 Homeland Security: $1,182,140,910,690
• As of 10/31/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,255,989,416,760
• As of 10/24/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,254,505,483,247
• As of 10/31/24 Military Costs: $3,113,306,878,365
• As of 10/24/24 Military Costs: $3,112,180,158,539
• As of 10/31/24 Veterans Care: $3,945,983,427,0154
• As of 10/24/24 Veterans Care: $3,934,734,141,704
• As of 10/31/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,747,502,367,834
• As of 10/24/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,732,534,269,942

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Elections belong to the people. It's their decision. If they decide to turn their back on the fire and burn their behinds, then they will just have to sit on their blisters. --Abraham Lincoln

Famous Last Words: That's all folks --Mel Blanc's tombstone

..........just to bathe my wearisome soul.........The Byrds …..I Am a Pilgrim (from the album Sweetheart of the Rodeo) Happy 88^th Birthday to the Rodeo Cowboys Association

If you're reading this, you desperately need a hobby –Alan Willcox + I'm just resting my eyes –Gloria Russell + And away we go --Jackie Gleason

May Peace grace your days
And Joy fill your nights
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh: Happy National Authors Day