eGgotic ePistle

 Famous First Words: Good evening... John Belushi First SNL skit ever aired in 1975

Welcome to World Egg Day! Chickens stay fit with eggercise. The local breakfast joint on the corner is offering American Breakfast with a Double Shot Eggresso.

..........Everybody thinks it's true..........Paul Simon …..Train In The Distance ~~At Jo's house one can hear trains. You can hear the Union Pacific which runs on the north side of the Kaw river and the Santé Fe* which runs on the south. I grew up near a train track and love the sound. ~~~~Rail travel at high speeds is not possible because passengers, unable to breathe, would die of asphyxia. --Dionysius Lardner

*In Kansas, apparently, it is still called The Atchison, Topeka, and the Santé Fe. --Take that New Mexico

A woman is like a tea bag – you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water. --Eleanor Roosevelt

It is a gorgeous Friday morning. The temperature is 73°F with a very light breeze. The sky is pale blue with no clouds – or planes or birds. I have been to my general practitioner doctor who says I'm okay and don't have to come back until January; so I am officially done with doctors this year. Puck has been out twice to pee among the giant trees in the backyard and now he's resting on his pillow. I am sipping water – haven't had coffee yet – and feeling smug about not needing to go back to any of the doctors. In fact the only concern left to me is whether the election will actually be over on November 6^th.

Hope your weekend goes eggactly the way you want, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Enjoy Life – It has an expiration date. --Submitted by Banksy Art 2024

When the egg got deviled, his friends called the eggsorcist. Words and eggs must be handled with care. Once broken they are impossible things to repair. --Anne Sexton

..........Got two good eyes but we still don't see.........Grateful Dead …..Casey Jones

Trivia Questions: Happy 49^th Birthday, Saturday Night Live

• ^ Who is credited with creating SNL?
• ^^ Who is the longest running cast member?
• ^^^ What is the phrase usually said at the end of the cold open?
• ^^^^ Who has hosted the highest number of episodes?
• ^^^^^ Who was the first Weekend Update anchor?

Big Hello: Ahó - Omaha https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If God had meant for us to fly, God wouldn't have given us railways.

Special Images of the Week from North Carolina: Removed because i mistakenly did not have permission from the author.

Classic Fake Library Statistics of the Week: The average librarian cardigan conceals two pencils, a flask, and an emergency kitten. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=t

Reading Joke of the Week: Reading for pleasure implies the existence of Reading for pain.

If you've broken the eggs, you should make the omelet. --Anthony Eden / Fresh eggs taste better because they just got laid.

..........way down, way down in my soul.........Jimi Hendrix …..Hear My Train A' Comin'

Moonbeam: Give me something to dance about, and I'll dance it. --Jerome Robbins

Blasphemy of the Week: The greatest trick the Devil ever did was convincing politically passionate Christians that the only way to be a true & faithful Christian is to be a bigoted, hate-mongering, lying sinner, who lives the opposite of all of Jesus' teachings. --Max Maxwell

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Curtis Guy, of Buffalo, NY: Name a certain breakfast cereal character. Remove the third, fifth, and sixth letters and read the result backward. You'll get a word that describes this breakfast cereal character. What is it? NPR Sunday Puzzle 9/29/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If you ever need me, I'm always just 5 missed calls and 6 text messages away. --Submitted by INRITH

Little known fact: Edith the Egg accompanied Lewis and Clark on their journey west. She's probably the world's most famous eggsplorer. The present was an egg laid by the past that had the future inside its shell. --Zora Neale Hurston

..........I hear the train a-comin', it's rolling 'round the bend..........Johnny Cash …..Folsom Prison Blues

^ Saturday Night Live (SNL) was created by Lorne Michaels and developed by Michaels and Dick Ebersol to air on NBC.

Almanac: It is Friday, October 11, 2024. The moon entered the first quarter yesterday (10/10) and is in Capricorn. It is International Day of the Girl Child, General Pulaski Memorial Day, National Coming Out Day, Southern Food Heritage Day, Emergency Nurses Day, Myths & Legends Awareness Days For All Fantasy Movie, Books, and National Pet Obesity Awareness Day. Because it is the second Friday it is also World Egg Day and National Family Bowling Day (or Kids Bowl Free Day).

Among those born on this day were Eleanor Roosevelt (1884), Jerome Robbins (1918), Art Blakey (1919), Elmore Leonard (1925), Dottie West (1932), Daryl Hall (1948), and Luke Perry (1971).

On October eleventh slavery was abolished in Maryland (1864), the Daughters of the American Revolution was founded (1890), Saturday Night Live premiered (Host George Carlin, 1975), Reagan met with Gorbachev in Reykjavik (1986), and Anita Hill testified against Clarence Thomas (1991).

Night Sky, 10/11: Comet low in twilight. Tsuchinshan-ATLAS (C/2003A3) https://earthsky.org/space/comet-c-2023-a3-sep-oct-2024-tsuchinshan-atlas/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: I have been told the dog's name, but I don't remember. I'm pretty sure the boys are Max and Ollie

This Week: Saturday, October 12 – Drink Local Wine Day & Free Thought Day & National Farmers' Day

Sunday, October 13 – English Language Day & National Chess Day & Silly Sayings Day

Night Sky, 10/13: Epsilon Geminids Meteor Shower: begins mid-evening, highest at 2 am. https://earthsky.org/astronomy-essentials/everything-you-need-to-know-geminid-meteor-shower/

Monday, October 14 – National Kick Butt Day & Native American Day & World Standards Day

Tuesday, October 15 – Blind Americans Equality Day & National Grouch Day & White Cane Safety Day

Wednesday, October 16 – Dictionary Day & National Feral Cat Day & Sukkot Day 1

Night Sky, 10/16: Lunar Eclipse (almost) Calculations show that the Sun, Earth, and Moon will be very closely aligned on this day, but there will be no lunar eclipse. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Thursday, October 17 – Black Poetry Day* & National Edge Day & Pay Back A Friend Day

*My favorite poem by a Black Poet is Give Us Our Peace by Langston Hughes https://www.how-matters.org/2011/09/16/langston-hughes/

Truth and eggs are useful only while they are fresh. --Austin O'Malley When the Easter Bunny had made all the deliveries she was egghausted.

..........Passing trains that have no names.........Arlo Guthrie …..The City Of New Orleans

^^ Kenan Thompson has been on the show for 21 seasons. He started in 2003.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Coffee: You haven't had enough until you can thread a sewing machine while it's running.

Special Images of the Week from North Carolina: Removed because i mistakenly did not have permission from the author.

Moonbeam: If work was a good thing, the rich would have it all and not let you do it. --Elmore Leonard

Fun fact of the Week: The first amniotic eggs, which are hard-shelled eggs that could be laid on land, appeared around 312–340 million years ago. The first chickens evolved much later, around 58,000 years ago at the earliest, So the egg came first.

Video of the Week: Judy Garland singing The Atchison, Topeka, and the Santé Fe from the film The Harvey Girls (1946). It won Best Song that year. https://www.facebook.com/watch/?

v=374999901982787

It isn't enough to talk about peace. Once must believe in it. An it isn't enough to believe in it. One must work at it. --Eleanor Roosevelt

Omelet smarter than I look. It may be the cock that crows, but it is the hen that lays the egg, --Margaret Thatcher

..........Bought a one way ticket back to the life that he once knew.........Gladys Knight & the Pips …..Midnight Train to Georgia

^^^ Live from New York, it's Saturday Night!

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: “I won't back down” --Tom Petty “I may readjust my stance if you have a convincing argument.” -Tom Reasonable

Weird Word of the Week: Quodlibet: It started life in the sense of a topic for philosophical or theological discussion. It has since transformed its meaning to refer to a light-hearted medley of well-known tunes. https://www.worldwidewords.org/ww-quo1.html

Dragon of the Week:

Special Images of the Week from North Carolina: Remove because i mistakenly did not have permission from the author.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Remove a scuff mark from a CD or DVD. Rub a little ChapStick lip balm over the mark and buff clean with a soft cloth or a coffee filter. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/chapstick.html

A day without an argument is like an egg without salt. --Angela Carter How many chickens does it take to change a light bulb? It takes a whole flock, but they won't finish the job. One to Pullet loose, one to Lay out the bulb, and everybody else will just sit there and Brood.-

...........Can't you hear the whistle blow..........Lots of People …..I've Been Working On The Railroad

^^^^ Alec Baldwin has hosted a record 18 episodes.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I was kidnapped by mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Creation Charlotte 2024 (11-13, Concord, NC) The road so far...the road ahead https://www.creationent.com/cal/ce_nc/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: Collide 2024 (10-11, Atlanta, GA) The South's largest Data and AI Conference https://datasciconnect.com/events/collide/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Toucan Sam → Mascot

Comedyhens tell the best chicken jokes. A hen's egg is, quite simply, a work of art, a masterpiece of design and construction with, it has to be said, brilliant packaging. --Delia Smith

..........He hears the silence howling.........Jethro Tull …..Locomotive Breath

^^^^^ Chevy Chase was co-creator of Weekend Update and was the anchor for the 75-76 season Writers Herb Sargent and Al Franken were the other creators.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: Documents filed during legal proceedings in the US have revealed that Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's son Yair Netanyahu had commercial ties with an American company called Parlement Technologies, the former parent company of Parler, a controversial social network affiliated with the far-right. Parler went offline in the wake of reports that it fueled the January 6th coup attempt, https://www.haaretz.com/israel-news/2024-10-02/ty-article/.premium/the-secret-commercial-ties-between-yair-netanyahu-and-far-right-social-network-parler/00000192-4856-d07b-aff3-5ff690880000

Quote of the Week: I have noticed that even people who claim everything is pre-determined and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road. --Stephen Hawking

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Pro Tip: Deporting half of the agriculture workers won't lower grocery prices. --Submitted by gr of oh

Today's Peace of History, October 11, 1987: More than half a million people flooded Washington, D.C., demanding civil rights for gay and lesbian Americans, now celebrated each year as National Coming Out Day. Many of the marchers objected to the government's response to the AIDS crisis, as well as the Supreme Court's 1986 decision to uphold sodomy laws in Bowers v. Hardwick

A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg. --Samueo Butler JD Vance's egg was seen acting weirdly today. I guess it's eggcentric.

..........She's a mighty good road.........Johnny Cash …..The Rock Island Line

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, 2024, eGgotic ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: In order to create, one must be willing to take risks and push boundaries. --Jerome Robbins.

Cost of War:

• As of 10/10/24 State Department Costs: $247,840,494,552
• As of 10/03/24 State Department Costs: $247,275,980,549
• As of 10/10/24 Homeland Security: $1,180,913,044,667
• As of 10/03/24 Homeland Security: $1,180,299,808,432
• As of 10/10/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,251,348,012,206
• As of 10/03/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,249,771,026,199
• As of 10/10/24 Military Costs: $3,109,782,907,489
• As of 10/03/24 Military Costs: $3,108,85,484,209
• As of 10/10/24 Veterans Care: $3,910,801,318,274
• As of 10/03/24 Veterans Care: $3,898,845,749,995
• As of 10/10/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,700,688,615,498
• As of 10/03/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,684,779,161,504

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

When will our consciences grow so tender that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it. --Eleanor Roosevelt

Famous Last Words: Until now, no one has ever invited me. --Orson Welles who died 10/11/85

..........Then to have your ham and eggs in Carolina.........The Andrew Sisters …..Chattanooga Choo Choo

Ellen Egg was angry about the new standards set up by the Chicken Advocacy Committee. She crossed to the middle of the road and stopped. She was ready to lay it on the line. This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them. --Gracie Allen

May Peace be your shell
And Joy be your center
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh 

dRunken ePistle

Famous First Words: Hey, Here they come... Kahn, Leonard & Greene The Toy Parade ~~This song served as the theme song for Leave It To Beaver which premiered on 10/4/57.

Happy Taco Day!! An Irish Taco is a beef taco served with Baileys. There's a fly in my taco. Don't worry the spider in the salsa will get it.

..........Next time won't you sing with me.........No artist listed …..The Alphabet Song ~~Today is Kids Music Day!

He serves his party best, who serves his country best. --Rutherford B Hayes

It is a quiet Friday morning. The sky is clear and very pale blue. The sun is just rising and trying to paint it bluer. A very slight breeze stirs a few leaves at ground level, but the tops of the tall trees are still still. The trees are stately and beginning to show their fall colors, although green is still prominent. No wind moves the leaves or branches. From this window at Jo's I see a Hydrangea bush whose fat flowers have all turned brown but whose leaves are still variegated and fresh. A utility pole dominates the left side of the window pictures (Windows reminded Michael Valentine of the living art on Mars – Stranger in a Strange Land). It is solid and a brown weathered to gray. Beyond that is Hickory street and cars and houses. All quiet and unmoving at 9 am. Puck has been out. He investigated the backyard; it has so many new smells. Now he is resting by my chair. I am sipping half-caf, creamy and sweet – and writing to you. Wow, what a morning.

Hope your weekend is tasty and sweet, ePistliers, but with a kick.

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Father to young daughter: Listen to me: Gender is a construct, society is a construct, money is a construct. But bedtime is very, very real. --Kit-Me Kate

Happy Vodka Day!! If they made taco flavored Vodka I'd be dead in an hour. Vodka may not be the answer, but it's worth a shot.

..........Wash the stamps off of the top of head...........Pete Seeger …..I'm Gonna Mail Myself To You ~~This is real. It was written by Woody Guthrie https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1GQ8pJXWAA

Trivia Questions: It is World Child Health Day

• ^ What is the leading cause of death to children under 5?
• ^^ What is the leading cause of death to children between the ages of 5-10 in the USA?
• ^^^ What is the leading cause of death for teenagers in the USA?
• ^^^^ What group of children are most at risk for death by homicide?
• ^^^^^ What is the second leading cause of death for teenagers in the USA?

Big Hello: Ƿes hāl – Old Prussian ~~That symbol which I could not find on any of my fonts is called a wynn. It is an old English letter pronounced as w. It didn't say what the old Prussian letter was. ~~As I am old and have some Prussian ancestors, I feel this is another example of England colonizing everything it laid its hands on. https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: No one in my life believes in me more than the waiter who just gave me a single napkin to use while eating. --Submitted by INRITH

Image of the Week: This photo is taken southwest-ish but mostly up in Jo's backyard. 10/2/24 3 pm more or less

Library Joke of the Week: I asked the librarian if she knew any authors who wrote dinosaur novels. She said I should try Sarah Topps. --Submitted by Laughing Librarian

Waiter, will my taco be long? No, ma'm, it will be round. / I love water. I especially love it when it's frozen and surrounded by vodka and orange juice.

..........And they swam, and they swam right out to sea.........Lady Nina …..Three Little Fishes

Moonbeam: The race is not always to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but that's the way to bet. —Damon Runyon

Blasphemy of the Week: Gods always behave like the people who created them. --Zora Neale Hurston

Puzzle of the Week: Take the phrase NEW TOWELS. Rearrange its nine letters to get the brand name of a product that you might buy at a supermarket. --NPR Sunday Puzzle 9/29/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Procrastination is a dish best served eventually. --Submitted by ma of md

Russian Holy Spirit is a drink of vodka and holy water. Taco Bell is promoting its fish taco with an aquatic reptile called a tacodile.

..........Whenever we go out, the people always shout.........Danielle Parker …..John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt

^ Globally, infectious diseases, including pneumonia, diarrhoea, and malaria are the leading cause of death in babies and young children.

Almanac: It is Friday, October 4, 2024. The moon was new last Wednesday (10/2) and is in Scorpio. It is Improve Your Office Day, International Ship in A Bottle Day, Kanelbullens Dag (Cinnamon Roll Day),Ten-Four Day, Vodka Day, World Animal Day, World Child Development Day, National Taco Day, and World College Radio Day. Because it is the first Friday, it is Kids Music Day, National Body Language Day, National Diversity Day, National Manufacturing Day (MFG Day), Manufacturing Day, World Child Health Day, World Plaid Day aka Plaid Day, and World Smile Day. Finally, because it is the first full weekend in October it is National Storytelling Weekend.

Among those born on this day were Louis the Stubborn (X, 1289), Richard Cromwell (1626), Rutherford B. Hayes (1822), Damon Runyon (1880), Buster Keaton (1895), Malcolm Baldrige (1922), Charlton Heston (1923), Dick Tracy (1931), Anne Rice (1941), Buddy Roemer (1943), Susan Saradon (1946), and Armand Assante (1949).

On October fourth Mexico became a republic (1824), the Orient Express made its first run (1883), the comic strip Dick Tracy was first printed (1931), the American Contract Bridge League voted for segregation (1949), Leave it to Beaver debuted (1957), Sputnik was launched (1957), Gambia achieved self government (1963), Lesotho (Basutoland) gained independence (1966), and Farm Aid '97 raised over $1 million for US farmers (1997).

Night Sky, 10/4: The Great Square of Pegasus balances on one corner high in the east through much of the evening. Two fists at arm's length to the Square's lower right shines Saturn, somewhat brighter. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Future mad scientist and his Igor. ~~No, I don't know which is which.

This Week: Saturday, October 5 – Get Funky Day & Chic Spy Day & World Teachers Day

Sunday, October 6 – American Libraries Day & Pickle Day & National Badger Day

Night Sky, 10/6: After dark look just above the northeast horizon — far below high Cassiopeia — for bright Capella on the rise. How soon Capella rises, and how high you'll find it, depend on your latitude. The farther north you are, the sooner and higher.

Monday, October 7 – Chowder Day & World Cotton Day & World Habitat Day

Tuesday, October 8 – International Face Your Fears Day & National Salmon Day

Night Sky, 10/8: Draconids Meteor Shower. Best viewing is in the early evening. https://earthsky.org/astronomy-essentials/everything-you-need-to-know-draconid-meteor-shower/

Wednesday, October 9 – Bullying Prevention Day & National Curves Day & S.A.V.E. Day (Stop America's Violence Everywhere)

Thursday, October 10 – National Handbag Day & Hug A Drummer Day & World Homeless Day

Live everyday like it's Taco Tuesday. If we start calling vodka “potato juice” would it be considered a health drink?

..........Well, he rode up to Miss Mousey's door, Uh-hun.........Bob Dylan …..Froggie Went A Courtin' ~~Yes, this is real: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8c8kO5RQIQo

^^ The leading cause of death for children ages 5-9 in the US is unintentional injuries or accidents. The next two causes are cancer and assault.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I'm old enough to remember when treason was a dealbreaker. --John Pavlovitz --Submitted by gr of oh

Moonbeam: Literature is air, and I'm suffocating in mediocrity. --Armand Assante

Fun Fact of the Week: It' World Smile Day. Experts have identified 19 types of smiles. However, they only list 10 and the other nine are combinations of the orginial 10. The originals are: Embarrassed, Qualifier, Contempt, Angry-enjoyment, Fake, Flirtatious, Duchenne, Fear, Miserable, and Dampened. https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20170407-why-all-smiles-are-not-the-same

Video of the Week: Dick Tracy Cartoon: Pearl Thief Grief, 1961 (4:30) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIa8wfIeZVA

To vote is like the payment of a debt, a duty never to be neglected, if its performance is possible. --Rutherfod B Hayes

Someone sent me an email about using vodka for cleaning around the house. It works. The more vodka I drank, the cleaner the house looked. Fred just ate 14 tacos. Now he's in a tacoma.

..........Who lives in Drury lane?.........The Countdown Kids …..The Muffin Man

^^^ Accidents are the leading cause of death for teenagers accounting for nearly half of all deaths. Cars accidents are the leading cause of deaths accounting for more than a third of all teenage deaths.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Never do anything you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics. --Submitted by bc of tx

Weird Word of the Week: Paroemiological – Related to proverbs. https://www.worldwidewords.org/ww-par4.html

Dragon of the Week: Dragon Head Mountain, South Sinai, Egypt

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Remove a ring stuck on a finger. Coat the affected finger with ChapStick and slide the ring off. The ChapStick lubricates the skin. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/chapstick.html

Taco Tess won an Emmy for playing a cop in Better Call Salsa. “A vodka, please.” “Sir, this is McDonalds.” “Okay, give me a McVodka.”

...........Yeah, we'll all go out to greet her when she come.........Daniel Radcliff …..She'll Be Comin' Round The Mountain ~~This too is real: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTJjLZSQehI

^^^^ Homicide is the leading cause of death for non-Hispanic black male teenagers.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: The summer is over. Hope you're happy, you pumpkin spice loving psychos. --Submitted by RHOZ

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Archon 47 aka Archon 2024 (4-6, Collinville, IL aka St Louis on the wrong side of the Mississippi) https://archonstl.org/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: 4^th International Conference on Science and Technology Education (2-3-4, Porto, Portugal) With its magnificent location by the Atlantic coast, Porto is the city of the world famous Port Wine and the River Douro. https://www.fe.up.pt/ste/2024/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: New Towels → Sweet 'n low

Unlike some people, Belvedere always goes down smoothly. Sister Martha always takes a few avocados to church with her. She likes holy guacamole on her tacos.

..........Beneath the trees where nobody sees.........Henry Hall …..Teddy Bears Picnic

^^^^^ Suicides have become the second leading cause of death among teenagers in the US. The teen suicide rate increased from 8 deaths per 100,000 (1999) to 8.7 deaths per 100,000 in 2014.

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: Some of Mark Robinson's favorite conspiracies: that 9/11 was an “inside job,” that climate change is “junk science,” and that Parkland survivors were “paid actors.” https://www.joshstein.org/press-releases/huffington-post-calls-mark-robinson-an-unbelievably-bonkers-conspiracy-theorist ~~He's running for governor of North Carolina

Quote of the Week: The task is to transform society; only the people can do that. Not heroes, not celebrities, not stars. --Huey P Newton

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I feel like I'm in season 5 of my life and the writers are just making ridiculous things happen to keep it interesting. --Submitted by ar of ks

Today's Peace of History, October 4, 1997: Demonstrations across the country occurred protesting the scheduled launch of the space probe Cassini because its power source was three plutonium-fueled Radioisotope Thermoelectric Generators. The probe carried 72.3 pounds of plutonium, the most ever put on a device to be launched into space. The concern was for an accidental release in the event of a launch mishap. Plutonium is the most toxic substance known.

I'm nacho average taco lover. Hakuna ma 'vodka. It means no memories for the rest of your day.

..........I don't know how she swallowed a cow..........Judy Collins …..There Was An Old Woman Who Swallowed A Fly ~~Yes, but she was on Sesame Street. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qC_xO2aN_IA

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, October 4, 2024, dRunken ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: To really ask is to open the door to the whirlwind. The answer may annihilate the question and the questioner. --Anne Rice

Cost of War:

• As of 10/03/24 State Department Costs: $247,275,980,549
• As of 09/26/24 State Department Costs: $246,722,840,295
• As of 10/03/24 Homeland Security: $1,180,299,808,432
• As of 09/26/24 Homeland Security: $1,179,698,986,548
• As of 10/03/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,249,771,026,199
• As of 09/26/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,248,226,030,502
• As of 10/03/24 Military Costs: $3,108,585,484,209
• As of 09/26/24 Military Costs: $3,107,412,399,484
• As of 10/03/24 Veterans Care: $3,898,845,749,995
• As of 09/26/24 Veterans Care: $3,887,134,195,158
• As of 10/03/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,684,779,161,504
• As of 09/26/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,669,195,067,787

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

The progress of society is mainly the improvement in the conditions of the working folk of the world. --Rutherford B Hayes

Famous Last Words: ...Get it while you can. --Janis Joplin died 10/4/70 of a heroin overdose.. She was alone. These are the last words from her last album released posthumously.

..........All on a Saturday night.........Jack Hartman …..Loopty Loo

Roses are read, violets are blue, vodka costs less than dinner for two. Have a spec-taco-ular day!

May Peace quench your thirst
And Joy satisfy your hunger
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh: (It doesn't work for vodka – I tried)

dIverse ePistle

 Famous First Words: It was spring without voices. --Silent Spring by Rachel Carson Published 9/27/1962

September 27 has at least 16 commemorations assigned to it. Let's begin with International Forgiveness Day! Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee and I'll forgive Thy great big joke on me. --Robert Frost Sometimes the first step to forgiveness is understanding the other person is a complete idiot. I'm praying for forgiveness. Kansas summers have taught me I do not want to go to hell.

..........I think that any love is good lovin'..........Guess Who with Randy Bachman …..You Ain't Seen Nothin' Yet

The real weapons of mass destruction are the hardened hearts of humanity. --Leonard Cohen

It is a delightful Friday... is it still morning?...with 73°F temperature and the sunshine enlightening a beautiful pale blue sky. Next week, I am going to go stay with Jo. She is having a hip replacement in December but needs help now because one can't bend, walk straight, lift things, etc. So I was at her house this morning while we made some decisions. I'll be moving on the first of October. Also on the first, Jeff is moving to his new apartment 3250 Michigan St, Apt 9-306, 66046. Big changes. Puck is going with me and will make two new friends, Mary and Martha, Jo's Shih Tzus. (I am taking my computer so the ePistle will continue.) Jeff is a little anxious about living on his own but he's also looking forward to it. Puck doesn't know yet so he's fine (sleeping on the recliner). Also, there is a new roof on our house – it looks great and the roofers have just finished cleaning up so they'll be gone soon. And this sums up my week pretty well.

Hope your weekend celebrates everything, ePistliers

First Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Crush A Can Day! I used to work for a recycling plant. My job was crushing cans. It was soda pressing.

Save The Koalas Day! Koalas: The epitome of cuteness and the koalaty of cuddliness. I am a koala in the bedroom; I sleep 22 hours a day. Koala bears aren't bears; they are children in bear pajamas.

..........Sparkle someone else's eyes.........Guess Who with Randy Bachman …..American Woman

Trivia Questions: Family Health and Fitness Day!

• ^ How many calories are burned by muscle compared to fat?
• ^^ What is the average number of steps taken per person per day?
• ^^^ What is the recommended time for children to spend exercising daily?
• ^^^^ What is the most common blood type?
• ^^^^^ How many times does the human heart beat in a day?

Big Hello: Wes hāl – Old(e) English https://www.omniglot.com/language/phrases/hello.htm

Second Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: National Scarf Day! When its human converted to Existentialism, the scarf had to learn to wrap itself around a bunch of new ideas.

Image of the Week: Puck explaining to mom why he had to pee on the floor. (It was raining outside and I was afraid my pee would cause a flood.)

Fake Library Statistics of the Week: You aren't a real librarian until you've been shushed by a patron. https://www.facebook.com/FakeLibStats/?fref=ts

National Bakery Day! John Lennon worked in a bakery while he was in high school. That's what inspired “Loaf is all you knead”. You can recognize alt bakers' they always go against the grain. The latest television hit is a series about dead bakers. It's called The Walking Bread.

..........I love to work at nothing all day.........Bachman Turner Overdrive …..Taking Care Of Business

Moonbeam: How strangely will the Tools of a Tyrant pervert the plain Meaning of Words. --Samuel Adams

Blasphemy of the Week: Beware of any Christian movement that acts as though the world is full of enemies to be destroyed rather than of neighbors to be loved. ---Mark Chape

Puzzle of the Week: From listener Rawson Scheinberg, of Northville, Mich. Name a US state capital. Then name a world capital. Say these names one after the other and phonetically you'll get an expensive dinner entree. What is it? NPR Sunday Puzzle 9/22/24

Next Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: If people make you sick, maybe you should cook them longer. --Submitted by sb of ar

Ancestor Appreciation Day! If you know the words Birth, Marriage, and Death in several different languages, you are probably a genealogist. Those little leaves on your Ancestry.com tree are cruel minions sent to make sure you stay up four hours longer working on genealogy. I'd rather look for dead men on Ancestry.com than living ones on Match.com.

..........You can see the morning but I can see the light.........Bachman Turner Overdrive …..Let It Ride

^ A pound of muscle burns three times more calories than a pound of fat.

Almanac: It is Friday, September 27, 2024. The moon went into the last quarter last Tuesday (9/24) and is in Leo. It is Ancestor Appreciation Day, World Tourism Day, Crush a Can Day, Gay Men's HIV/AIDS Awareness Day, National Bakery Day, National Brave Day, National Day of Forgiveness, National Doodle Day, Fall Astronomy Day, National Scarf Day, National Walk to Work Day, Native American Day, and Save the Koalas. Because it is the fourth Friday, it is American Indian Day. Finally because it's the last Friday in September it is Vegan Baking Day, and Support Purple for Platelets Day.

Among those born on this day were Samuel Adams (1722), Thomas Nast (1840), George Raft (1895), Sam Ervin (1896), Louis Auchincloss (1917), William Conrad (1920), Jayne Meadows (1926), Randy Bachman (The Guess Who, 1943), Meatloaf (1947) and Shaun Cassidy (1958).

On September twenty-eighth the Jesuit order was founded (1540), John Adams was appointed to negotiate peace terms with Britain (1779), the Democratic National Convention voted to admit women (1919), the US officially recognized the Nationalist government of "China" (1928), the QEI was launched (1938), the Tonight Show with Steve Allen premiered (1954), and Sierra Leone became the 100th nation to join the UN (1961).

Night Sky, 9/27: This is the time of year when the rich Cygnus Milky Way crosses the zenith about an hour after full dark (for skywatchers at mid-northern latitudes). The Milky Way extends straight up from the south-southwest horizon, passes overhead, and runs straight down to the north-northeast. http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/sky-at-a-glance/

Fraternal Picture of the Week: Two boys and two rabbits and two legs and a lot of straw

0

Extra Funniest Thing of the Week: Tonight Show Survey: Question: Are you planning to… Response: 100% - vote early. Yes~

This Week: Saturday, September 28 – International Lace Day & National Good Neighbor Day & World Rabies Day

Sunday, September 29 – Gold Star Mothers Day & National Coffee Day & Michaelmas

Night Sky, 9/29: Face south and look high these evenings after dark. The brightest star there is Altair, the southernmost point of the Summer Triangle. The other two are Deneb and Vega more nearly overhead. A marker for Altair is always its little neighbor Tarazed (Gamma Aquilae), currently a finger-width at arm's length to Altair's upper right.

Monday, September 30 – Ask A Stupid Question Day & Orange Shirt Day & Recovery Day

Tuesday, October 1 – International Music Day & National Lace Day & National Walk Your Dog Day

Wednesday, October 2 – Guardian Angels Day & Name Your Car Day & World Farm Animals Day

Night Sky, 10/2: Annular Solar Eclipse: Visible in the Pacific and in South America/ https://www.timeanddate.com/eclipse/solar/2024-october-2

Thursday, October 3 – Bring Your Bible To School Day & Techies Day

Vegan Bakery Day! Most ghosts are vegan because it's super natural. My girlfriend really changed after she became a vegan. It's like I've never seen herbivore. Almond milk is called “milk” because not one can call it “nut juice” with a straight face.

..........Really love that rock and roll.........Meatloaf …..Hot Patootie, Bless My Soul

^^ The average person walks about 7,500 steps per day.

Preantepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: WWI: When a Serb kills an Austrian in Bosnia so you, an Englishman, must fight the Germans in France.

Moonbeam: The president seems to extend executive privilege way out past the atmosphere. What he says in executive privilege is nothing but executive poppycock. --Sam Erwin

Conspiracy Theory of the Week: First she gets the vote, then she gets your wife. The belief that voting will turn women into lesbians: https://medium.com/history-of-women/a-review-of-some-anti-suffragette-postcards-from-the-early-1900s-f4f7adb6b84

Video of the Week: Jack Kerouac with Steve Allen on the Tonight Show 1959 (5:21)

If ever a time should come, when vain and aspiringf men shall possess the highest seats in Government, our country will stand in need of its experienced patriots to prevent its ruin. --Samuel Adams

World Tourism Day! Remember both the common tick and the Eiffel Tower are Paris sites. We are visiting the pyramids in Egypt because they were too heavy to transport to the British Museum. The story that the Great Wall was built for defense was a cover up of the fact that it was really built as a skate royal board park.

..........but I just won't do that.........Meatloaf …..Anything Thing For Love

^^^ Children should spend at least an hour a day exercising...Jump rope, hop scotch, walking, biking, running games, etc.

Antepenultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: I will have the English major's breakfast – eggs over easily.

Weird Word of the Week: Omnishambles – an insult implying an organization has made several serious policy and public-relations blunders... https://www.worldwidewords.org/tp-omn1.html

Dragon of the Week: Not sure if this is a dragon or Godzilla, but it's cool either way.

Wacky Uses for Common Products: Moisturize skin. Rubbing ChapStick on your face protests the skin from wind burn while snow skiing. https://www.wackyuses.com/wacky/chapstick.html

National Brave Day! We're all brave until we realize that cockroaches have wings. Do you know that story of the brave German boy who could only count to three; he knows no vier. Bravery: Chancing a fart when you've had diarrhoea.

...........I'll be gone when the morning comes.........Meatloaf …..Bat Out Of Hell

^^^^ O Positive (O+) is the most common human blood type.

Penultimate Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Meanwhile in Kansas the temperature went from 90° to 65° like it just saw a state trooper. --Submitted by RHOZ

Science Fiction Convention of the Week: Capclave24 (27-29, Rockville, MD) ...a small relaxed literary convention... https://capclave.org/capclave24/

Actual Science Conference of the Week: Association of Science and Technology Centers (ASTC) Annual Conference (9/26-10/1, Chicago, IL) ...leaders in museums and science centers... https://astc2024.eventscribe.net/

Answer to Puzzle of the Week: Dover (Delaware), and Seoul (Korea) → Dover Sole

Save Your Photos Day! The picture of Einstein with his tongue sticking out was taken for comedic purpose, and the quote “He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. “ is a signature line of his. --Monique A thorough survey of the crowd at the Trump rally revealed that 97% of the crowd was photographers hoping for a shot of the next attempted assassin. The Portrait Photographer specialized in youies.

..........I'll tell you about the magic; it will free your soul........Shaun Cassidy …....Do You Believe In Magic

^^^^^ The heart beats around 100,000 times per day.

Quote of the Week: Is Capitalism your religion? --Dr Butch Ware, Green Party Vice-presidental candidate https://www.ays.media/podcastnoor/butchware

Final Hip Replacement Update of the Year: OrthoKansas has declared me well. They scheduled me for a one year check up next June and sent me on my way. Yay!!!

Final Funniest Thing I Read of the Week: Furniture Store named Shack of Sit

Today's Peace of History, September 27, 1990: The last US Pershing II tactical nuclear missiles were removed from Germany, fewer than ten years after their installation provoked a massive anti-nuclear movement across Europe.

Ancestor Appreciation Day! --because the last section was really about genealogy. My great grandma was 80% Irish. They called her Iris. Today I'm going to go see my 81 year old grandpa for the last time. Tomorrow he'll be 82. I'm told my great, great grandma began walking 2 miles every day. She was 74 and lived in Kansas City. She died at age 86 somewhere around Seattle.

..........I met her on a Monday and my heart stood still........Shaun Cassidy …..Da Doo Ron Ron

Masthead of the Week: Friday ePistle, September 27. 2024, dIverse ePistle. Online at: http://fridayepistle.blogspot.com/ Exclusive editor: Christine Smith. Lawrence, KS.

Moonbeam: Ours is a government of checks and balances. The Mafia and crooked businessmen make out checks, and the politicians and other compromised officials improve their bank balances. --Steve Allen

Cost of War:

• As of 09/26/24 State Department Costs: $246,722,840,295
• As of 09/19/24 State Department Costs: $246,163,433,960
• As of 09/26/24 Homeland Security: $1,179,698,986,548
• As of 09/19/24 Homeland Security: $1,179,091,356,643
• As of 09/26/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,248,226,030,502
• As of 09/19/24 Interest on War Debt: $1,246,163,299,899
• As of 09/26/24 Military Costs: $3,107,412,399,484
• As of 09/19/24 Military Costs: $3,106,225,825,459
• As of 09/26/24 Veterans Care: $3,887,134,195,158
• As of 09/19/24 Veterans Care: $3,875,290,058,974
• As of 09/26/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,669,195,067,787
• As of 09/19/24 Total Cost of Wars: $9,653,436,281,854

https://www.nationalpriorities.org/cost-of/

Liberty will not long survive the total extinction of morals. --Samuel Adams

Famous Last Words: ...nature exists for the convenience of man. --Silent Spring Rachel Carson

..........Do you remember when we were young and unashamed........Shaun Cassidy …..Walk Away

Fall Astronomy Day! The Dog Star decided to go into stand-up comedy. He failed because he was too Sirius. How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb? Only one because they've got all night as it's ****ing cloudy. That's my last Astronomy Convention. It was creepy. There were a bunch of black holes in the corner discussing dark matters.

May Peace define your demeanor
And Joy establish your manner
prairie mama
christine

Last Laugh: National Doodle Day!